081 I Jumped Into Niagara Falls & Survived

Jordan, a man who battled severe social anxiety, terrifying psychosis episodes, and a schizophrenia diagnosis, shares his incredible story. He jumped into Niagara Falls and, through his profound faith in God, miraculously survived.

In this raw and powerful interview, Jordan opens up about the depths of his struggle, the moment he attempted to end his life, and the inexplicable way he emerged from the raging waters. His journey is a testament to resilience, the power of hope, and the unwavering strength he found in his spiritual beliefs.

This is more than a survival story; it's a testament to the human spirit's capacity to overcome unimaginable darkness.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

So initially I was diagnosed with a drug-induced psychotic episode. Eventually they diagnosed me with schizophrenia, but now it's, thank God, it's been downgraded to bipolar. I always thought the drugs and the alcohol helped me with my communication abilities and my social ability. I started to develop thoughts that people were following me out to get me or after me. I thought that meant someone was following me or after me for some reason, that I had done something incredibly wrong in my life. And I chose to take my life because of it. And I stood on that rock for over eight hours, 400 meters from the edge of the falls, waist deep in the Niagara River, staring death in the face.

SPEAKER_00 0:57

Welcome to Multispective. I'm so excited to have you on this podcast episode.

SPEAKER_01 1:03

Thank you very much for having me. It's absolutely fantastic and a blessing to be here.

SPEAKER_00 1:08

Yeah, I love this positive spirit and this positive vibe. And I feel like once we kind of know a little bit more of your story, all of this is going to come together. I

SPEAKER_01 1:17

think I was just a happy kid the whole time and I was just thinking some weird shit in my head, you know?

SPEAKER_00 1:22

Yeah, yeah. So, Jordan, tell me a little bit about your childhood. Where does it all begin for you?

SPEAKER_01 1:28

i grew up in a small town called smithville um it's in the west lincoln or close to the niagara region of ontario canada it's like a little country like a little farming town we had the the chicken mill that everyone kind of went to play by the creek down in the woods and we would build our tree forts and go watch the cheerleaders play at the high school and now back in the woods we would have a bonfire and that's sort of where i grew up as a child we would ride our bikes to school. It was very much an innocent childhood. My parents brought me to church regularly, and at that point in my life, I always make the comment that I don't know if I really connected, but recently someone informed me, actually, that at such a young age, I was already making comments and sharpening Sunday school teachers with some very deep questions but yeah i moved to the niagara region st catherine's niagara on the lake in the fifth grade where i went to a new school and uh i i always struggled with um the demon of social anxiety um you know i wrestled with feeling like i wasn't enough and like other people were judging me or out to get me or against me quite often in my childhood as well it didn't manifest into something really detrimental to me until later in life but as a kid i i sort of had those prodromal symptoms all along I went to a new school in grade five and I was heavily picked on as the new kid in school. I was bullied quite a bit and I took it upon myself to, you know, try and fit in and do what I can to fit in, which sometimes involved telling little white lies or even blatant ones like Eminem is my brother to the kids in school. And it was all in a stupid childish effort to fit in with the new kids. But it only made matters worse for me because kids looked at me and they go, well obviously Eminem isn't your brother you're just some kid from Smithville Ontario but yeah I was introduced to a youth group and a Pentecostal church called Central Gospel Temple at the time it's now Central Community Church and I was heavily involved in just a loving inclusive environment there and I found a home I gave my heart to God at 12 which honestly is I believe saved me. I mean it did literally save me.

SPEAKER_00 3:58

So you mentioned that you had social anxiety growing up. Did you turn to your family, to your siblings, to anyone else that you could feel comfortable and safe with to share these difficult challenges you were experiencing?

SPEAKER_01 4:13

Yeah, absolutely. I had a good support network in my family. My sister was the first person I reached out with when I started having incredible problems that I now know as a psychotic episode. And my sister, you know, she trains mental health professionals. She's done addictions counseling in her life. And she's been a great support, as has my mother and the rest of my family. They're all there for me. They love me no matter what, which I'm extremely grateful for because I know not everyone has that kind of support network.

SPEAKER_00 4:48

It's great that you had sort of that foundational, you could come home to a safe place, to a set of people that loved and cared for you. You mentioned psychotic episodes, Kenny. walk us through that?

SPEAKER_01 4:58

Yeah, absolutely. It was around the age of 24 or 25. I started noticing some incredibly strange and surreal things going on around me. I started to develop thoughts that people were following me out to get me or after me. I was noticing unusual behaviors in my roommates, in people of the public. I was taking the bus to work and I would be thinking that, oh, I need to be seen on camera. And then someone would walk in front of the camera and I would think that they were trying to make it look like I was doing a drug deal on public cameras and all sorts of kinds of strange and unusual thoughts like that. I now know what doctors describe as a psychotic episode, at least to my understanding to be a spiritual battle and something that's incredibly demonic in nature. I sort of feel that it was God speaking to me the entire time just through creation, but in an incredibly unusual way that I'm not sure everyone completely understands.

SPEAKER_00 6:06

Yeah, so, I

SPEAKER_01 6:13

mean... I've learned over the years, you know, in church environments and settings that we kind of have three voices within ourselves. There's the voice of God, there's the voice of ourself, and there's the voice of the adversary. And they're all going to sound like your own thoughts. But I mean, at times, I suppose it can, when you're thinking to yourself, sound very similar to either someone you know, or a public figure or someone else. But yeah, it's It's quite incredible. I had been doing a good number of drugs and drinking too much prior to a lot of this, and I started to notice just unusual thought patterns that I was having. And I looked at the TV at one point, and I saw the number 14. And 14 had always been this number that tells me that God is with me every time I see the number 14. And then years later down the road, I was speaking with a friend, and I found out that the 14th day of the Nizam calendar is the day before Jesus' crucifixion. The crucial part to it, and this is something the Bible calls us to do, is to pray without ceasing. So anything you think in your head, that is a prayer to God whether you know it or not. And if you consciously pray to God and ask Him questions, He will answer and He will respond in the physical world.

SPEAKER_00 7:48

Interesting. So can you just talk to me a little bit more about your journey? So you mentioned that in your early 20s, you started having these episodes. Can you give me some instances, some circumstances? What did it look like for you? What did it look like for maybe your family around you that they would see you? How were they able to sort of tell that, hey, something is not quite right here? I know you mentioned that you were having these kind of thoughts in your head, but how did it manifest physically for you?

SPEAKER_01 8:15

So quite honestly, it was like a month-long panic attack for me. I would have moments where I would stand frozen, almost being unable to move, unable to think, unable to reason. And it was just an incredibly terrifying time for me. My answer to everything was, I don't know, at one point, because I didn't know what was going on around me. And I was terribly confused and afraid and terrified. by interactions with the world.

SPEAKER_00 8:51

So you actually did have an awareness that something was wrong. Because I do know a lot of people who get into, have episodes that are not aware of the thing that's wrong. They're so deeply in it that they don't know that, hey, something is off.

SPEAKER_01 9:07

I think that's actually accurate. I didn't really know that something was wrong. I was just terrified and I didn't, I was unaware that there was something off in my brain.

SPEAKER_00 9:18

Right. What would doctors call this? I mean, this episode, is there a term to this condition that you were having?

SPEAKER_01 9:25

So initially, I was diagnosed with a drug-induced psychotic episode. Eventually, because these psychotic episodes persisted without drug and alcohol use, they diagnosed me with schizophrenia. But now it's, thank God, it's been downgraded to bipolar. I no longer experience psychosis. And that's not only Possibly with the help of medication over the years But largely in part due to a spiritual shift and the healing that God's provided me

SPEAKER_00 9:59

interesting so How did they diagnose this with a drug-induced psychotic episode first? What was it that you took that caused potentially this?

SPEAKER_01 10:13

So at one point in my life, I was taking a lot of cocaine and MDMA. I think primarily it's the cocaine that maybe caused the paranoia and confusion. Doctors do attribute psychotic episodes a lot to marijuana. I know from their research, and I was smoking probably about a half quarter a day, quite a good amount of marijuana. To me, I'm not so sure that it's necessarily exactly the drugs that caused it. More so just experiences I had in the world that... you know the the enemy or satan took advantage of and uh started to attack me harder i think because i had a higher spiritual calling and and i've been through an amount of suffering that has brought me to this day honestly and and this time that i'm going through right now um on a bit of a missions trip um where i i still experience attacks but i i also experience incredible blessings along the way

SPEAKER_00 11:22

the psychosis is not happening to you because now you're one more aware of of it you are understanding hey this is kind of i can feel Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:51

I think I would be in denial to say that it wasn't addiction. A lot of people say it's recreational, and they don't realize that they're trapped in a cycle of addiction and dependent use. Even habitual use can sometimes toe the line into addiction the more you use it, and you don't even realize that one drink a day, if it's every day, is also seen as addiction. I took a lot of the weight of my parents' emotions on during their divorce. And I also struggled incredibly with the social anxiety and feeling insecure and just like I was less than or not enough. And I always thought the drugs and the alcohol helped me with my communication abilities and my social ability and being able to speak to women and friends and stuff like that. Where in the long run, I actually believe it it hindered me extensively.

SPEAKER_00 12:49

Yeah. I think a lot of it is like, you know, we can really have a good sense of like a good family base and everything. But at the end of the day, it's, if we are feeling, you know, disconnected or we're feeling lonely or a sense of, you know, not belonging in a way, then, you know, it can set us in a very, very dark path in our later lives. And so I can see how sort of this all spirals out for you. So you were in this sort of state of paranoia and the psychosis you mentioned for how long?

SPEAKER_01 13:20

So I was in and out of psychosis for... You know, months at a time, weeks at a time, up to six, seven weeks at a time, a number of times in my life. It was persistent for me. It wasn't like a one day or a one hour experience. It was something that was extensive and absolutely terrifying.

SPEAKER_00 13:41

Were you also experiencing hallucinations? Were you seeing things as well? Or was it mostly just auditory?

SPEAKER_01 13:47

That's the thing about what I experienced. I don't believe I hallucinated at any point in my life. I was never seeing or hearing things that weren't real. Now, the schizophrenia diagnosis does fit because I had delusions that were firmly held. And at one point, my motor actions were slowed and distorted as a result of what I was going through. So I did fit two of the criteria for diagnosis, but I've never hallucinated in my life. I've never experienced auditory or visual hallucinations.

SPEAKER_00 14:23

And how did this sort of affect things like your friendships, relationships? Relationships, work, job? I

SPEAKER_01 14:29

was able to hold down a job for the most part. But later in life, things really started getting to me mentally and physically too. It was just exhausting and draining. And I found myself in and out of work, unable to hold on to jobs, unable to do anything with a rigid schedule because I was unable to get up on time and take care of myself. And I went through some very depressive type states as well.

SPEAKER_00 14:56

So walk me through sort of like the time when it got really dark for you, really bad for you.

SPEAKER_01 15:02

You would have to say the darkest time of my story is my life attempt. And quite honestly... I don't see it as a dark time. I see it as an incredible blessing. But people look at it and they say, what the hell? Like, who would ever think to do this in their life? And I was thinking some strange things and some very unusual thoughts at the time. And I was noticing these one in a million coincidences over and over and over again. And because I was noticing these coincidences, I was terrified. I didn't know what was going on. I thought that meant someone was following me or after me for some reason, that I had done something incredibly wrong in my life and I chose to take my life because of it. I drove up and down the Niagara Parkway close to Niagara Falls and eventually stepped out of my vehicle, left it on the side of the road and waded into the water above the falls. I floated the rapids with my body for about a kilometer before I had this incredibly surreal experience in which I believe I met God. I saw my body in third person. This was a visualization I literally saw myself in third person tumbling about the rapids as my soul was like ripped from my body and it was during that moment that I heard the thought that it wasn't my time to die and I knew that that was God speaking to me in my mind and I was returned to my body at that exact second and then spit out of the rapids to a place that was relatively calm where I could swim to safety and I swam to the edge of the river through a another set of rapids, which is a miracle in itself. And I located a rock close to the edge of the river, protruding from a wall of the Niagara power generating station. And it's funny because it's this incredible power that I overcame being the water and the river. And it's this incredible power being God that saved me. And this rock I found in the river, I can only see as a metaphor for the rock that Jesus Christ has been in my life, which is absolutely incredible. And I stood on that rock for over eight hours, 400 meters from the edge of the falls, waist deep in the Niagara River, staring death in the face, until I was finally rescued. Early in the morning, a lady poked her head over the railing just above me, and she just let out a, do you need help? to which I responded with an obvious and emphatic yes. Like, please get me the hell out of this river and back onto dry land.

SPEAKER_03 18:30

My gosh.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

Yeah, it was an incredible experience and I only see it as a blessing and it taught me to value and cherish life. And now I appreciate every single breath I take that much more. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:47

Would you say that that moment that you had like this outer body experience and you were watching your body in third person, was that like an NDE? Would people call that a near-death experience?

SPEAKER_01 18:57

I believe they would. And, you know, some people say it's a psychological thing. You know, you're just fearful of your, you know, descent into death or facing death in the face or staring death in the face. People would generally say that you're fearful of staring death in the face. But I would actually say more so that it's the moment between life and death where God begins to call you home and sends you back to earth.

SPEAKER_00 19:26

Yeah, like you. The most painful... Part of death, I think, for people is the fear before it. And the moment that you let go of that fear and you just accept that, hey, look, this is, it is what it is, you know, like today's the day that I die and I'm not, I'm just not going to fear it anymore because I've come to accept that that's happening. And I just, you know, wish everyone else in my life and in my family well. And, you know, you let go of that feeling, then it is actually a very, very overwhelmingly peaceful experience. Do you think that that kind of happened to you at one point? Did you feel like an overwhelming sense of peace during that time?

SPEAKER_01 20:10

I did, and it was incredible. Like, I was embracing death when I first dove into the rapids. I was exhaling underwater, trying to kill myself, and eventually my body just kind of went limp, and I went along for the ride, and I shot the rapids with my body until I was finally spat out.

SPEAKER_00 20:29

Tell me about any injuries. Did you sustain injuries? You must have had some injuries.

SPEAKER_01 20:33

Absolutely none. The hospital checked me for pneumonia because that water is pneumonia-inducing year-round. I had nothing. They did an x-ray of my lungs for water on the lungs. I had absolutely nothing going on in my lungs. My heart was rock solid. I had no physical injuries. I had no cuts or bruises. I just had a healed soul and a new lease on life.

SPEAKER_00 21:04

My God, that's crazy. Did they say this is a miracle? Were they like absolutely shocked to see this?

SPEAKER_01 21:11

No, they said this kid's schizophrenic. Give him some medication. And when I told them that it was God and God healed me two years later, they really struggled to believe me. And I think that's something that is you know, difficult to process for me. I mean, at times I struggle to see exactly what's going on within the institution, and I know there's definitely a lot of good that goes on in the mental health world, but I think there's good and evil not only in every institution in the world, but also in every person and human and being on this planet, right?

SPEAKER_00 22:01

I mean, I guess good is no good if there is no evil to sort of like balance it in a sense, right? It's just like in the sense that you'll never appreciate the sun or daylight if you don't have night to sort of like balance that too. But when you got out of this, you obviously go through the whole medical system, check for everything. You know, the doctor said that you're schizophrenic. What happens after that? Do they get you a medication? Do they put you in an institution? Like what happens after this for you?

SPEAKER_01 22:32

Yeah, I was in the mental institution in the hospital for six or seven weeks the first time, where I just... I struggled through. I was having strange thoughts still, not knowing what was going on. They were giving me medications left, right, and center that I felt didn't really do anything for me for the most part. I think the most healing I found was in my mental shift, in seeing the strange things that scared me as an attack of Satan and the good things that were positive as a message or word from God. And that was what provided me the most healing Do

SPEAKER_00 23:13

you sometimes still sort of like battle with feeling like, you know, with the depressive thoughts or with some kind of paranoia sometimes? Not at all. And the fact that you sort of did that all on your own and just by your faith in God, right? And how that sort of just like completely lifted you from it. So Jordan, can you tell me a little bit about what would you say is like your purpose today? I mean, given everything that you've gone through, what is your purpose today?

SPEAKER_01 23:37

Honestly, my purpose is to share and spread love, hope, happiness, and purpose to everyone in life. And I just do that in absolutely any way that I can.

SPEAKER_00 23:49

Yeah. Tell us a little bit about the organization that you started.

SPEAKER_01 23:54

Yeah, so in the hospital, actually, I founded a nonprofit organization that I've called One True Love and Light. The One True Love and Light is Jesus. But we provide free mental health and addiction services and support online. And recently, as we've moved into Winnipeg, we're working on implementing a free designated driver service and a ride service to kind of disrupt the taxi and the cab industry and provide anyone in need with a ride anywhere they need to go for free. All volunteer based and with no expectation or judgment.

SPEAKER_00 24:37

Yeah, I love that. Yeah, your story is really, really powerful. You should definitely think about maybe writing a book about it or documenting. I've

SPEAKER_01 24:46

written a book. Absolutely, yeah. So I've written a book called Grace in Recovery, A Path to True Freedom. It's available on Amazon. I have music on Spotify, Apple Music, and anywhere else you stream. Jordan DeYoung, check it out. A lot of the lyrics are written by me. And with the help of artificial intelligence, I've put along some music and vocals. I do intend to re-release and re-record things myself. But at present, I'm using that um to get myself through every day honestly i listen to my own music every day i've got it pumping in the car and i'm just

SPEAKER_00 25:25

going your book is about your story your journey

SPEAKER_01 25:28

is it yeah so the book is uh it's actually a blend of uh alcoholics anonymous and celebrate recovery um it's a christ-centered approach to recovery um from drug addiction mental health issues and absolutely any type of trauma in life um and it it also includes a the autobiography of myself too.

SPEAKER_00 25:50

Yeah. Jordan, thank you so much for being on this podcast and sharing your story and being vulnerable on air with us today.

SPEAKER_01 25:56

Yeah, my pleasure. It's been a blessing to be here. Thank you very much.

SPEAKER_00 26:04

If you enjoyed the episode and would like to help support the show, please follow and subscribe. You can rate and review your feedback on any of our platforms listed in the description. I'd like to recognize our guests who are vulnerable and open to share their life experiences with us. Thank you for showing us we Thank you to our team who worked so hard behind the scenes to make it happen. The show would be nothing without you. I'm Jenica, host and writer of the show, and you're listening to Multispective.

UNKNOWN 26:37

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