Women & Money: The Shit We Don't Talk About!

Setting Holiday Boundaries Without Busting Your Budget with Lisa Chastain

Barbara Provost & Maggie Nielsen Episode 113

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The holidays don’t have to break the bank or your sanity.

This week, we’re joined by Lisa Chastain, a renowned expert in personal finance and dedicated to empowering passionate and successful women to overcome the shame and guilt surrounding their finances. Lisa has built her entire career supporting individuals to rewire their money mindset and adopt a strategic framework to focus on healthy spending rather than restrictive budgeting. 

Lisa shares how childhood experiences shape our holiday spending habits, why quality time beats quantity of gifts every time, and the five money personalities that show up when December rolls around. We also dive into her favorite holiday hacks, like stacking credit card points, creating “holiday-only” savings accounts, and forecasting your finances months in advance.

Whether you’re worried about overspending on gifts, feeling guilty about saying no to parties, or just wanting to make this holiday season more meaningful, this conversation is packed with perspective shifts and practical tips you can use right now.

00:00 Intro: The Ultimate Mantra

00:46 Navigating Financial Independence

01:03 Guest Introduction: Lisa Chastain

02:03 Setting Holiday Boundaries

04:17 Shifting Holiday Mindsets

07:47 Money Personalities and Holiday Spending

11:23 Strategic Holiday Planning

15:15 Credit Card Points and Holiday Savings

19:45 Values-Based Holiday Planning

Lisa reminds us that financial freedom isn’t about perfection, it’s about intention. If you're ready for even more support before the holiday rush hits, join us on Oct 16th for our next Money Talks session: Real Strategies to Protect Your Wallet and Your Wellbeing Before the Holidays. Click here to register for FREE and bring your questions!

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Barb: Maggie, what's your favorite holiday memory from when you were a child?

Maggie: It's all about the magic. First of all, I still love like stockings just because it has every, the little things that you need. You never know. I just love a little goodie. But one year, we were younger, we got you guys up out of bed, blah, blah, blah. Went downstairs, did our Christmas thing.

And of course dad was like, you know, the story. Dad was like, I think I heard something upstairs. And so we went upstairs and there was like this big chest there for you as a gift. And it was just one of those things, like we had no idea how it got there when he did it. Like he seemed to be there the whole time.

And I just remember being like. What the heck? Like how did that happen? Because usually, not usually, but

Barb: Always, you can figure it out. That's what you were gonna say, right, Maggie? Yes. I know you little booger. You can always figure out a surprise.

Maggie: try to, I love to be surprised, [00:01:00] but it just is like I'll end up having to grab something. Or like one time we were looking all around the house for something, so like, I saw the TV that you guys bought, and I was like, no, I didn't know. But that one I was like, I had, and it was one of those things like I don't really care about a chest, and it wasn't even for me, but I'm still just like awestruck of how it happened.

The magic.

Barb: It was magic. It wasn't there and then all of a sudden it was, and you didn't know how it happened. So you were probably very frustrated. 'cause you know everything. You were a little girl that always figured everything out before we could even surprise you. That was the problem.

Maggie: but I still love a surprise, so sometimes I just try to pretend like I'm not even, I don't even try to look, 'cause I want to be surprised, like I have to hold myself back. But I know I'd love a surprise later.

Barb: Yeah. Well, and I I remember when we tied all the packages up.

Maggie: Brown paper packages tied up in string.

Barb: Yes. That's what we did one year

And then we'd always play spoons right in front of the fireplace with our dog, Bachi. Who [00:02:00] always wanna sit right in the middle. Right. And you guys would always make cookies.

Maggie: Yeah, it's always my thing is making some cookies. I'll feed you guys some cookies. Anyone who's listening. 'cause I usually like to make at least five kinds, but in a house full of three people, that's a little aggressive.

Barb: It's a lot of cookies. Yeah. And they're great. And then nice Christmas morning breakfast.

Usually a nice strata and a coffee cake, all homemade. And nice, hearty, healthy winter walk outside with the dog.

Maggie: And then you would usually take a nap and make us all watch the sound of music.

Some reason women your age love the sound of music. I don't know what it is, but like your generation, the hills were aligned.

Barb: They're alive, not aligned.

Maggie: They're straight hills. Okay? They're all in a row.

Barb: And I didn't hear you say one thing about a gift.

Maggie: I mean, we had some good ones, but yeah, it was always the magic behind it. Like one year we got a game cube, which was crazy and we're like, it doesn't fit in the [00:03:00] tv. 'cause the TV didn't have like the red, yellow and white little pro things. It was a really small tv and you're like, go down and just double check. There was a new TV with the three little prongs in it and we're like, look at that. It was magic.

Barb: I know. I just wave my magic little wand.

Maggie: I know you do. That's always you up all night putting together the toys. Loving to stay up late

and put some magic.

but.

I know the holidays can be stressful for people as well, we have these great memories, but I know there's a lot of stress and a lot of hard work and a lot of anxiety sometimes going into it, of making sure everything's done. But we're just gonna flashback and remember why we're all here.

And that's really to enjoy the time, enjoy the magic, and it's not always about all the spending.

Barb: No. And after this conversation with Lisa, I'm really taking away, the memories of. When we went downtown and got some hot chocolate, went to the little outside mart, even though it was so darn cold, but we had some nice hot chocolate and we just [00:04:00] strolled through the cold and things like that.

Those are memories that I cherish and love and remember and really wanna delve more into those types of memories. You and I took that little holiday bus one night member around the city and things like that, which was so beautiful and fun. And just those types of events and time spent together are really what's fun around the holiday time.

Maggie: And I think this is also a great time. I always have to remember that some people do love to give and I have to let them love to do that. It is their love language and I have to let them do their love language.

Barb: people don't have to feel pressured to give 

Maggie: No, but you know, you gotta let people do what they wanna do. I'm gonna wanna push cookies on you.

That's the way it is. Not everyone wants a sugar. I do.

Barb: well, let's 

get into what Lisa has to say. She has some amazing, great vibe around great ways to engage. holidays and not be stressed out about money.

Maggie: So put your feet up and take a listen.

 

[00:05:00] Gloria Steinem once said, we will never solve the feminization of power until we solve the masculinity of wealth. Barbara Provost and Maggie Nielsen are the team at purse strings that will help you navigate the ins and outs of financial independence so that you can be financially fearless. This is women in money, the shit we don't talk about.

Maggie: For this episode, we are thrilled to have Lisa Chastain with us today. So before we dive into all about, setting holiday boundaries, without busting your budget, could you share a little bit who you are and what you do with our community?

Lisa: Absolutely. I'm a full-time money mindset coach, and I'm on a mission just like purse strings for women to be the leaders of the world financially, which is gonna take some mindset work for us to get there. Wasn't always great with money. I'm a blue collar girl, [00:06:00] born and raised here in Las Vegas, and so just like my dad says, I was raised in the school of money by some hard knocks through financial failure.

Even as a financial advisor, I had so many things that I had to learn about money and what I'm really passionate about mechanics of money, they're important, budgeting, cash flow, those kinds of things. But my heart is with helping women understand why they make the decisions that they make, really getting to the root cause of what motivates us financially.

And so I'm really excited to hop into this conversation about the holidays today.

Maggie: Yeah, we're excited. As I know, the holidays can bring up a lot of emotions, especially a lot around money and spending. It can kind of be like a financial minefield. So how do people shift from like the stress and guilt to setting clear healthy boundaries about spending?

Lisa: So I'll take you on a journey because I love having this conversation with my clients and also with different groups. If you individually think about what was most important to you and [00:07:00] what you remember about your holidays, most people I ask that question to is not around the number of toys or gifts that were under the tree

Almost always when I ask point blank to someone, what do you remember about the holidays that you want to hold onto? It's the memories they have with their family, and I think that's a great way to cut through the noise and the chaos of the spending frenzy and all the marketing that we're getting from different people who want our money for the holidays. It's a huge time of year. I get that. But before we jump into spending, let's think about and be intentional about what are the memories from our childhood that we're trying to recreate, and is that really what we want? Are we just operating out of a program from our childhood that's what we should be doing?

And that's a game changer for a lot of my clients.

Barb: Yeah, I get that. Because holidays are so different for each one of us, depending on. Our family of origin and how we were brought up. And I've said this before, but you [00:08:00] know, I'm one of 13 children, so you can imagine our holidays were quite different than the holiday I tried to create for my own children, which was two, so, very different and in so, so many ways.

Always wanting to make sure it was, of course, like we all do, special, meaningful that, I always wanted to make sure every holiday had like an extra special gift that they remembered that exact holiday for. I actually hate the holidays for that reason. It's so stressful.

It's so, I need one more this, I need one more That, did I get enough? I'm counting who got what, and it's never enough. You feel like you're never done.

Lisa: Yeah, that's scarcity. Talking right there, talking about money, mindset, that scarcity, that it won't be enough. And let's hone in on our children for a minute. What do we want for our children? We want them to know that they're loved. Without even realizing it unconsciously, we're connecting and attaching what we spend on them and what we give [00:09:00] them to love, and they don't need any of that to feel loved.

So one of our favorite holiday traditions is we go out and serve. Because we want the holidays to be about so much more than what they have under the tree. And actually now that my boys are teenagers, we go to experiences. We're taking our kids to Disneyland. We're not gonna fill the tree full of gifts.

Yes, that will require us to spend some money, but it's quality time. And the research backs this up when it comes to spending. The more you spend on experiences, the happier you are versus the things.

Maggie: that makes so much sense. I mean, and you think about like any part of your childhood, the big things that pop out are always like a family trip, big or small, even if it was like a road trip to see someone a couple hours away, it was still like, remember that bus stop that we saw and all those people, or just some goofy things that you can't even plan for or pay for.

It's just like the adventure along the way. How do you kind of shift though from. You have your children, but then you have everybody in your life that you feel like you have to get something for the house cleaner, the mailman, the [00:10:00] babysitter, the teacher, all these people where it's like, that is where I feel like the budget breaks because then you're like, I don't remember if I got something for them.

Did I get something last year? Blah blah, blah. And people are putting stuff out for the Amazon guys, and it's just like, alright, like where, I get that everyone wants to feel seen, but then it's like, alright, now, like, come on.

Lisa: Yeah, it becomes a tit for tat, well, you got me something so I have to get you something. And in my twenties for sure, I was in that rat race, if you call it that, of I wanna make sure that someone gets something then it always goes back to.

Something maybe that we're imagining from childhood or Disney taught us this, that there's this magic of opening a gift on Christmas morning. And Scrooge will tell us that it doesn't matter. That's not the thing that matters. At the end of the day, tiny Tim taught us everything. That it's the people in our lives that are most important.

So the question becomes, what can we do then? To make someone feel appreciated and [00:11:00] loved. If it's not buying a gift, a simple letter of appreciation or taking a walk with someone, quality time trumps physical objects when it comes to showing our appreciation for people, which also requires you to be strategic with your time.

I love my husband for so many reasons, and this is his holiday tradition. He bakes pies. So we don't give traditional gifts. We don't spend time buying gifts for the people that we love, but the people on the list know that there's a blueberry pie coming for them and they cherish that.

that doesn't cost a lot of money. But everybody knows that Jimmy's gonna bring 'em a blueberry pie.

Maggie: And how many blueberry pies are you gonna get? I mean, you're not gonna get any doubles, sadly, almost. 

Lisa: That's right, but you only get it once a year. Everybody loves it. So I think that we're in a great space and place in our culture and as women to just reimagine and revisit what the holidays are all about altogether.

Barb: I love that reframing of it and really thinking outside the box instead of just buying [00:12:00] something off the shelf, being more, human, more personalized, more thinking about, taking a walk or writing a note about. A memory or something that you just would love to say to someone that maybe you just didn't have time to say before.

So that's really beautiful. I love it. And if you've talked before about ditching, like strict budgets, right? And focusing on a money personality instead. So can you share a little bit about that and how that plays into managing holiday expenses without feeling restricted?

Lisa: Yeah, every money personality's gonna have a different attachment to what they want to spend. And I'll give you a good example of this. So there's five money personalities in my world, and there are lots of iterations of this, but in my world, we keep it pretty simple. We have the saver, the giver, the spender, the dreamer, and the avoider.

You can imagine with each five of those personalities, who is going to value what, when it comes to the holiday season. I have a client they live in New Jersey. The wife is a [00:13:00] spender. The husband's a saver, he's very diligent and thoughtful in the way that he spends money.

And also he doesn't need a lot of material things. He's not a materialistic kind of guy. And so for Christmas, when it comes to their two kids, this is where they fight. The most because he's telling her, babe, like we just don't need that much. Let's just get them one quality thing because savers think in terms of quality over quantity.

And she says, that's not how I was raised. Spending money is my love language and we've gotta have all the gifts because that's what we did as kids. So it almost always goes back to childhood and how we learned how the holidays are supposed to be, and each of these money personalities are going to have different attachments based on what they value.

Most importantly, what they believe when it comes to money. The Dreamer money personality has a different mindset With money. The avoider is going to avoid the conversation altogether. And so that also pertains to our individual strengths. And when we look at the disc profile, there's other [00:14:00] kinds of assessments out there.

 People have different strengths when it comes to money. A saver could be based on their strengths, a good budgeter, but they also could be holding the purse strings. And like choking the other partner by saying, no, we can't spend any money at all, even though we have millions and millions in the bank. So we gotta check ourselves on that.

And to be honest with you, most people that I know and work with might have a budget, but they don't really follow it strategically. So I prefer to go back to a vision for the holidays and start with that. What is our vision for the holiday? What's the experience that we want to create with our kiddos?

What's most important to us about this holiday season? And realize on the national average, per individual, right now in America, it's $800.

Barb: Wow.

Lisa: Now for a family of 13, that would add up pretty fast. Right?

Barb: That wasn't what was spent. That maybe total out of everyone, But I, 

Lisa: I would say that the reason for that is that we're not being [00:15:00] intentional. We're just on the go train. That money equals happiness and that these gifts are going to equal something. And that's just not the case when it comes to research and psychological studies. So be mindful of that. And ask yourself this before you spend any money.

Is it worth it? Is it going to be worth going into debt? Is it going to be worth taking money outta savings? Only you can answer that question.

Barb: Yeah, for sure. And the other thing I felt, or I saw was when my children were young, was the. Kind of keeping up with the Joneses, especially when the children are like, this is the biggest toy out there and everyone is getting it. That's a tough place to be because sometimes those toys are very expensive and hard to find and all of that.

Right. So that was a tough time, but I'm with you on the experiences though, too.

Lisa: When it comes to budgeting, the best thing you can do is get ahead of it. And if we know, the national average is $800. Now would be the time listening to this [00:16:00] episode in this moment to understand if you're not budgeting, I prefer financial forecasting. I prefer to look at my finances six months ahead of time where I know exactly how much I have come December or November.

And so if you know that's the national average that we're working with, what do you have? Versus what don't you have? That's a quick reframe for you to look at as a family. Okay, well what do we have to spend on Christmas? And then how do we manage that and how do we plan for that? That's a way more fun conversation versus looking at a budget and saying, well, we don't have anything.

And I think sometimes we default to that and that's not a helpful or healthy money mindset in my opinion.

Maggie: $800, I would've guessed higher. A hundred percent. I mean, as a single person, I can see spending 800 between like family and stuff, maybe a little less, but like if you had kids and stuff, 

Barb: Wait, isn't that 800 per person?

Lisa: 800 per person.

Maggie: like you spend on each person.

Lisa: 600. It's 600 to $800 per person, which is similar to the back to school spending.

Maggie: [00:17:00] Oh.

Lisa: And it just keeps going up every year, of course. 'cause electronics are more expensive. Kids want those kinds of things. That's my least favorite kind of financial advice to give is do this, don't do this.

It's just a more of a, like, can you be more thoughtful about it? And at the end of the day, what's going to matter most? The kid in that moment, yeah, they might realize that they're not getting the iPad or the thing, but over, over the course of time, it ends up evening out in experiential happiness and memories that they're making because kids wanna spend quality time with the people that they love the most. 

Maggie: So many of us feel pressure to say yes. To everything during the holidays. So what mindset shifts help you kind of say no without the guilt and sometimes without the fomo?

Lisa: That's a tough one. And I think it's going to depend on what stage of life we're in and realize that every decision that we make is emotional. It's hard to take the emotions out of it. So when it comes to fomo, future pace yourself. This is a neurolinguistic programming strategy. And ask [00:18:00] yourself this, is this going to matter when I'm dead, like hardcore?

Probably not. Okay. And if it is FOMO or the pressure of saying yes to everything, realize that your mental energy and your physical wellness matters more than anything. It serves no one for you to run yourself ragged in the holiday season. Again, that's scarcity. We wanna be abundant and abundance means that I have self-love, I have boundaries, and I understand the role that I play in these people's lives.

Renegotiate if you can't make it to every single holiday party, pick the one that's most important to you with the people that you know you're going to be really happy about being around. Start there and renegotiate anything. Say no to anything that isn't going to matter to you when you're dead.

Most of it will not matter.

Maggie: Yeah, I'm thinking like those old holiday work parties I used to go to that were just like, now Barb and I, we just do a little celebration. But when some of those, it's like we're, even if you're trying to show face to be good at the [00:19:00] business, it's like, ah, this is not where I would like to spend my energy right now.

Especially when you have a thousand different things to do and you've already seen a thousand different people and you're like, this is not the one I'm gonna say yes to.

Lisa: Yeah. I talk about a general generational conflict. I think that we learned a lot from the boomers in terms of obligation. And millennials, but more so Gen Z right now are basically saying, I don't subscribe to those philosophies. No, thank you. I think we have a lot to learn from Gen Z and their ability to put the boundaries in place and just realize that we don't have to be everything to everybody.

Maggie: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

Barb: So what's one surprising money habit you encourage? That actually frees people up during such a busy season.

Lisa: Credit card points.

Barb: Oh, say more.

Lisa: Yeah, we just had this conversation in our mastermind with a gentleman who came and taught us all about the ways that you can maximize credit card points, but how cool would that be? Let's just say that you find a really good cashback card [00:20:00] and for the entire year. So I do this candidly, and I have a few different places where I like put money away.

For the holidays. Acorns is another place where 25 bucks a week goes into my Acorns account and I just stack the cash. So lots of different places you can kind of squirrel it away. But with credit card points, if you had one great cash back card, and there are a lot that are on the market right now, even for using your debit card, you can get cash back and you can allocate those points or that cash back for the holidays.

Then all year long, starting right after the holidays, you can start accumulating those points and seeing there's different times in the year too where you can use those points and maximize them. So how cool would that be? You could earn points in cash back and then use those for the holidays. And then girl math, it's basically free,

Barb: That's brilliant. 

Lisa: Yeah. So use the hacks that are out there. Credit card points didn't exist 20 years ago, but they do today. And so I'm not really a hardcore, no credit cards, [00:21:00] all kinds of things. It's just let's use what we have available to us. And Acorns, even Coinbase to a certain extent I invest in different with.

Discernment. I invest in different stocks and I am seeing those rewards, and then I cash 'em out for the holidays and we're good to go. We just don't have to stress about the holidays. We know they're coming once a year,

Maggie: Yeah, we always act

Lisa: strategically, right? Like, oh my gosh, it's here.

Barb: Back in the day when I worked at a bank, we used to have Christmas accounts. People would open them up, you'd get a little present almost when you opened them up and they would be like you would deposit a certain amount every month, $25, $50, whatever, every month. You'd open 'em up at the beginning of the year, and then at the end of the month you would draw all your money, it'd be closed out, and that was your Christmas money

they were actually called Christmas accounts. And they even had [00:22:00] vacation accounts too. So same difference. They're not tagged that anymore. But you could use savings accounts that same way where people dedicated money towards these certain, places they knew that they would eventually spend their money.

Lisa: But I love the idea of points because we use ours for travel, but certainly for Christmas is brilliant because several hundred dollars is probably stacked up by the end of the year. That's right. That's right. So use the resources that you have available to you think ahead of time. Not everybody does that successfully, but let's do that to the best of our ability. And I'm a huge fan. So instead of budgeting, that's what I implement. I have different accounts for different purposes. I know exactly what money I have for the week, what I have money for the long term.

So by teaching your brain how to see your money, brilliant. Right? Open up an account that's just for the holidays, stack money away every single month. You get paid biweekly or whenever you get paid, every paycheck put a little bit away, and then it's less pressure. It's a little bit easier. It feels [00:23:00] better.

Another thing I would suggest is to go back and look at what you spent on Christmas the last year and the year before. Give yourself some averages to work with before you set up some type of saving strategy. That helps a lot.

Maggie: Yeah, that way you actually have a real number to work with. 'cause sometimes we just pull one out of thin air and it doesn't quite add up. But the points are so funny, and I know this could be a whole different conversation, but I was, bickering with my brother the other day. And we were talking about, he's like, I don't get how people get these, all these flights with their points.

He's like, I never have 'em, because he always applies them to his credit card. So the bill's smaller every month, and I was like, well, yeah, you don't like build them up and spend them. He goes, well, yeah, but why wouldn't I put them to my credit card every month? And I'm like, well, they're not gonna be both.

You only get them once. Right? And so it's just kind of really having that plan of like, it's for the trip or it's for, it's like already pre allocating them as well, you can't send 'em now and again later. So you gotta figure out how to, is it a trip? Is it Christmas? When are we gonna use 'em?

Or just every month.

Lisa: Sure. And I mean that [00:24:00] industry is super savvy now and you can transfer points from one place to the next and really maximize your points. So if you're gonna go that route, I say maximize everything that you can, but coming in full steam ahead to the holidays.

Just be honest with where you're at and come back to what is the memory that you're trying to recreate. 'cause the whole point of that is that you can't. And if you're trying to recreate memories, you're attached to something that is not realistic. So come back to self. Look at your values. Value-based planning, values-based living, what do you value most and operate accordingly financially.

Maggie: And I think that kind of leads right into our next question. 'cause we talk about, money freedom isn't about perfection, it's about intention and that self-compassion. And so how can that perspective, make the holiday season feel less stressful and more joyful? I know you said it's a lot about thinking about what you want those memories to be.

What else would you add there?

Lisa: Talk to the people that [00:25:00] you love and ask them what's important to them about the holidays. You might be surprised. So even your three or 4-year-old child is capable of communicating what they want. So before you go into debt, before you spend all the money, have open honest conversations now with people in your life about what they value and what's important to them.

People have different money personalities, people have different love languages. And again, if all we're doing is trying to manage other people's expectations. Almost always someone is going to be let down in that conversation. So just come back around to what's important and what's valued versus expectation.

Because if you spend the Red Rider BB Gun, do you remember that movie? Okay. All he wanted was the Red Rider BB Gun. That's all he wanted, and the end of the movie ended very differently. Then it being the red Rider BB Gun. That made him happy and he was obsessed about it, but when it came down to [00:26:00] it, it was spending time with his mom and his dad and his brother.

And I know he wouldn't take that memory back. So we get obsessed about these things, but it's really the people that we love at the end of the day that matter the most. So just remember that.

Barb: it's so important and to keep that, it's almost like we, we need a mantra for ourselves when we do get caught up in the holiday, chaos if you will. I'm not a spender, so I don't even like the stores and all the shopping. In fact, we don't do a lot of gifts. My husband and I, we don't even buy gifts for anniversaries or birthdays or anything because that's not important to us.

What's important to us is just spending time together. Maybe we go to a nice dinner or we, spend time going to dinner in a movie or something low key. That's all we need, but I can see where people get caught up in a lot of the, when you're, I just see them at the malls, they're just piling away the gifts and the bags and all of that.

But it's almost like you need a mantra that's I don't know what the mantra would be. [00:27:00] Lisa, do you have one that would be kind of like, What's important to me right now would be spending time with my family and not, something that's purchased in a box or something like 

Lisa: Mm-hmm.

I don't know about a mantra. I think that we could give that to our listeners for homework to really think about what would be the thing that would help you stay out of the chaos and be intentional because, I myself, I don't love going to the mall and those kinds of things, but I know my husband is a spender because that's his love language and that's how he learned love.

So I wouldn't wanna make him wrong for wanting to spend money, but what I can do to the best of my ability is communicate to him that's not what matters to me, and that's not my love language. And he can go and buy me the nice thing, but at the end of the day, what I care about is waking up and having breakfast together Christmas morning.

And my boys coming out of, they have bedhead and they're rolling out, and the stalking sometimes is even more exciting because they went to bed and it wasn't staffed or full, and now it is. And just some of those magical pieces. So I think the [00:28:00] ultimate mantra could be, will this matter when I'm dead?

And if the answer's no, don't buy into it. Remember that 85% of the world's wealth is spent by women. And marketers know this, and they are targeting us now for the holidays. And you have to realize that in the consumer culture, you're being targeted and it's unconsciously back there.

So the other check, the reality check would be, is this what I want or is this what I think I should want? And be aware and conscious of that.

Barb: Or is this what a marketer's telling me I should want,

Lisa: That's right. Why are commercials, the commercials are so emotional for that reason. You see someone in a, they get a new car and you see their reaction and they're so happy for those 30 seconds. But what you don't see on the other end of it, which is what I see in my office, is the couple fighting about the new car because they [00:29:00] can't afford

Maggie: It blows my mind. I'm like, if you are sharing a budget and bought one much less two cars without consulting each other, I'm like, are you serious right now? I would be pissed unless you paid that full price outta your own little piggy bank. Like, don't add that extra bill. We didn't talk about that.

That's right. It's madness. So shut it down. Center and focus in your nervous system. We do that work in my world too. Breath work and meditation and calm it down and just. Stay totally focused on what's most important to you and you'll have a happy holiday season 'cause you choose to have a happy holiday season.

Now I've gotta know, what do you like to make for your holiday breakfast?

Lisa: I don't cook.

Maggie: Okay, so whatever someone's making is

Lisa: What? Well, yeah, so Backstory is my husband loves food. He's the live to eat kind of person. And I just eat because I have to. And so it doesn't matter to me. And he loves being in the kitchen and he loves making those experiences happen.

So whatever Jimmy's gonna cook, I'll eat. 

Barb: [00:30:00] So for listeners who are feeling overwhelmed, just thinking about the holiday costs right now, what's the first small step they can take right now to feel in control.

Lisa: The holidays are such a special time. They really are. But they can also be really stressful. We all know that. That's exactly why we're here. So one thing that you can do right now is imagine how you want your holidays to be this year. Not operating from your past. Because if we go down that memory lane road, maybe we're trying to heal and fix things over time, like those emotional conversations come up in the holidays.

So be kind to yourself. Slow down right now. Slow down. Take a deep breath and ask the important question of what's most important to me? How do I want to feel about the holiday season? Actually feel, do I want to feel calm and peaceful and protect that energy? Because we make spending decisions based on emotions.

So tap into the [00:31:00] emotions that you want, not the emotions that you don't want. Focus on creating that today and moving forward into the holidays.

Maggie: I think this has been a great conversation and makes me think like I'm kind of excited to like take it slow and hang the lights, and bake the cookies and really, sometimes it's so much rushing to like this specific day where it's just like each little step along the way is like a fun little time as well.

So, I'm so glad you gotta come and share your expertise, especially in this area. And there is a question we like to ask all of our guests. And so now it's your turn. What is your definition of financial freedom?

Lisa: My definition of financial freedom is waking up in a home that I love with people, that I love doing things that I love. If I can do that every single day for the rest of my life, then it'll be a job well done.

Maggie: That's a new one for us. We haven't heard one like that before.

So, yeah, thank you so much, Lisa, for coming on and sharing your expertise. We're [00:32:00] definitely gonna have links to, all your socials email and that money personality as well in the show notes so people can dive more in there. And yeah, we appreciate everyone listening and so please give us a follow, give us a share, and until next time, be financially fearless. 

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