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The Longing Lab
Do you ever find yourself so fixated on longing that you can’t enjoy the present? Longing for a lover, an exotic destination, a lost loved one, or a past time in your life? The Longing Lab takes a deeper look at the science of longing and the culture that drives us to long for what we don’t have. You can expect insightful conversations with individuals uniquely qualified to talk about longing. Host, Amanda McCracken, has written or spoken about her own addiction to longing in national publications like the New York Times, Washington Post, & the BBC. The goal of the Longing Lab is to inspire individuals to make positive changes in their lives. Look for her book, When Longing Becomes Your Lover (Hachette), in February 2026!
The Longing Lab
James Beard award-winning restaurateur Bobby Stuckey on longing, listening, & longevity in hospitality
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Episode 39 Bobby Stuckey, James Beard award-winning restaurateur and master sommelier, discusses how he finds joy in the mundane, the essential skill of listening in hospitality to understand what customers are longing for, and how endurance running has contributed to his longevity in the profession.
Bobby Stuckey, founder of the James Beard Foundation award-winning and Michelin-starred Frasca Hospitality Group, is a renowned Master Sommelier, restaurateur, winemaker, and cookbook author. With a career spanning nearly four decades, Bobby's journey from busboy to award-winning operator includes notable roles at The Little Nell and The French Laundry, where he helped earn numerous accolades, including the James Beard Foundation’s Outstanding Wine Service Award. In 2004, Bobby and his business partner Lachlan Mackinnon-Patterson opened Frasca Food and Wine in Boulder, followed by other successful ventures like Pizzeria Alberico, Sunday Vinyl, Tavernetta, Osteria Alberico and Tavernetta Vail. A passionate advocate for the industry, Bobby received Food & Wine’s Mentorship Award in 2024 and the Julia Child Award in 2025. He is also a founding member of the Independent Restaurant Coalition. When not working, Bobby enjoys spending time with his wife, Danette, listening to vinyl, running marathons, and supporting sustainable practices in the restaurant industry.
Learn more here: https://www.frascafoodandwine.com/team-member/bobby-stuckey/
In this episode, (in order) we talked about:
*What fine dining means to different people
*The importance of listening in hospitality
*Why he busses tables at his own restaurants
*Identifying and satisfying longing in different customers
*Stuckeyisms related to preparation (i.e. the piggy bank theory)
*The role endurance running has played in his life
*Ways in which he’s a coach at work
*Future goals
Quotes
“I enjoy the mundane and the normal things that sometimes people would find boring or tedious. And I find a lot of joy in that, and it reduces the longing effect.”
“Sometimes I get recharged to this inspiration of the craft of hospitality through people you wouldn't think would be inspiring for my craft.”
“Hospitality is not about you. It's about someone else. We're not great at it in our country. Our culture has many beautiful things. The American culture is not about hospitality. We're not about thinking about the other person. And part of thinking about the other person is listening.”
“If we just obsess about perfection, it's unobtainable. So, what we have to do is do the best and work on our craft every day…We need those Friday nights, though, because then we learn skill sets that you can't read in a manual. How do you change gears and how do you stay like a swan when, wow, it seems like everything's up against you.”
“Running to me is part of my whole ecosystem of longevity in this profession.”
“Things that I would love to see have nothing to do with awards for Frasca. I think, at the moment, I would love to see policy writers on the civic level, the state level, and the federal level understand restaurants better.”