114. Grief Before Debate: Christian Perspective After Canadian School Shooting

A small northern BC town is shattered by a school shooting, and the noise machine spins up fast. Before the takes and the threads, we slow down to honor the lives lost, sit with our own shock, and ask a harder question: what actually helps a grieving community right now? From my seat inside the response at work, I share how “action mode” can hide unprocessed pain, why early political battles rarely serve the wounded, and what love looks like when the cameras leave.

We walk through the pressure points exploding online—gun rights in Canada, school policies around gender and identity, and the instinct to use tragedy to score points. I don’t dodge the hard topics or the need for change. Instead, I offer a framework for timing and tone: grieve first, then advocate wisely. That means truth without hate, clarity without contempt, and courage anchored in compassion. We talk practical, too: how to support families with meals, check-ins, childcare, and donations; how to show up for students who are scared; and how to move beyond social media into real influence.

We also name what’s been building: a youth mental health crisis fueled by screens, isolation, and broken systems. Real solutions live in consistent presence, local counseling access, church and community rhythms, and parents reclaiming digital boundaries. If you’re ready to work for change, we map the right channels—MLAs, MPs, school boards, and legislative petitions—so energy turns into outcomes, not outrage. Listen to ground yourself, gather your people, and choose compassion over performance. If this resonates, share it with a friend who’s hurting, subscribe for future conversations, and leave a review to help more neighbors find a path toward healing.

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Transcript

The Shooting That Shook Our Region

Inside The Response At Work

When Logic Masks Our Grief

Gun Rights Debate Ignites Too Soon

Schools, Policy, And Misplaced Anger

Centering Families And Real Support

Youth Mental Health Crisis Exposed

Resist Social Media Infighting

Truth Without Hate

SPEAKER_00 0:40

Hello and welcome to another episode of Counterculture Mama Podcast. I it has been a while. I started a new job in December. I after coming to Jesus and really putting my my business aside, um, for those of you who are new here, I had an oracle and psychic and Akashic Records um new age-based business. And over the past couple of years, as I've been slowly being called back to Jesus, um, obviously that had to go. Um, the convictions I would say started long before I even consciously gave my life to Christ. And of course, after I did that and after I got baptized, um he brought me the rest of the way. And so I walked away from an income stream, a um, you know, a huge part of my life, and I had to kind of just trust that the Lord would provide, and he did. So I have been working full-time since the start of December with a job that kind of fell into my lap. I wasn't actually intending on going back to work, um, but here we are. So as a result, it has been a lot more challenging to sort of adapt and you know make time for church and my faith and my life groups and all of those things that matter to me, as well as obviously my family, and then working full-time on top of that. So I apologize for being away for so long. I don't know at this point how consistent this podcast will be, but I will make an effort to at least come in with short little episodes here and there as I can. The reason for the episode today is unfortunately not um not something that I overly want to be touching on. It's not something that I wish had even happened, honestly, but um this past week uh a community about two hours away from where I live um experienced a mass school shooting. And obviously it's come as a shock to our region, it's come as a shock to Canadians as a whole. Um you know, we have heard of school shootings uh in the US, but uh on Canadian land it's really not commonplace at all. Um you know, we we can probably count on two hands how many mass shootings we've had in the last 50 years. And so um something like this, it it shook us. And with the role that I have with my job now, um I was kind of thrown right into the middle of it. I was privy to information before it was being released publicly. I was finding, you know, resources and ways to support our community, and so there was really no escaping it this week at work. I um yeah, I I I was kind of in the middle of it. And because of that, you know, I went straight into action mode, right? Of being there for other people, of looking for solutions, of looking for answers, of processing with logic. Like I was I was right in there, um, just trying to hold it together for everybody else because I knew that I was needed. And um, not that this is about me, but it just kind of all hit me at the end of this week, um, that I'm not okay either, and I need time to process too. And uh yeah, so when when things like shootings happen, especially, you know, close to home, especially when I also have, you know, a 12-year-old in school, and uh, you know, there's there's a lot of threads that make it very personal. And in this part of the country, in this part of BC, we are very tight-knit among the communities, um, because our populations are very low. We're pretty remote, like two hours away is actually super close for for us. Like, that's that's basically our backyard. Um and so with all of that, you know, not only have we been sort of in in the eye of the storm, but we've also been um seeing it everywhere, right? Obviously, social media is a thing. Um and so we're seeing it in local Facebook groups where parents are concerned for their kids' safety. We're seeing it in, you know, BC wide groups, Canada wide groups, um a lot of different circles are talking about it. We're seeing President Trump uh talking about it and calling attention to it. And um, so it's expanded a lot farther than what like the average piece of Canadian news travels, right? Like most of the time, my American friends don't hear about the things that go on here. Um and as such, it's sparked a lot of debate. There are a lot of political things going on right now um in North America, but especially in Canada, especially in BC. Um, you know, our our federal government is wanting to basically remove our firearm rights. Um, they have been dismantling that for probably the last five or so years, and um, you know, targeting lawful gun owners in order to um, you know, quote unquote make make the streets safer, even though statistically we know that it's not the legal gun owners that are committing firearms-related crimes. Um and so that is obviously like flaring up uh people who are pro-gun rights. Um, and I I I fall in that camp. Um, but a lot of the people who are pro-gun rights are um using they're they're almost bypassing the tragedy of what happened and going straight to defending guns, right? And anybody who's awake, anybody who knows what's going on in the world, like we see the plays, right? We know that it's coming where the liberal government is going to use this as a way to push the gun buyback that they're doing and you know, push through the legislation to take away our guns. Um, we know that that's gonna happen. And it's frustrating. Um, and at the same time, now is not the time for that debate, right? Three days ago, we lost a a whole bunch of people, right? We've got two that are in the hospital fighting for their lives. And um, so to to turn it political this soon and this quickly, yes, we need to be aware of what the government is gonna do and the way that they're going to spin that in the propaganda machine. And at the same time, like, we need to pause, we need to grieve, we need to feel our emotions, we need to rally around these communities and these families that are impacted by this. And now is just not the time for that debate. The other debate that's coming up is the one about trans and LGBT policies in schools. And again, that's a very valid debate. There's a lot of concern there. There's a lot of stuff going on in the school system that is absolutely not okay, that is absolutely unacceptable. There are things going on in the court system. There have been cases where um parents have been threatened of their parenting rights uh because they're not supportive of their kid receiving blockers and hormones and and you know, transitioning on a on a physical and physiological level. Um so like it's again a very real issue that does need to be addressed. Policy does need to change, and we do need more Christian values um infused into our morality as a society, um, which historically has preserved our society and will continue to like right some of these wrongs. But at the same time, um, same thing, the time for that conversation isn't right now. Um, you know, whether it's talking about the mental health resources in our region, which is an issue, um, they they are lacking, and that's that's a real thing. But um, you know, whether it's mental health and oh, we should, you know, lock people up when they when they display certain traits and things like that, or whether it's um, you know, just using this as again like a mascot of this is why we should hate trans people, like this is not a place for hate for one. And I and I know people are emotionally charged, and so I'm trying to give people grace in that too, but like we don't need to engage in infighting and go after one another um in a time of tragedy. We need to take note of of some of the factors that are at play. We need to take note of where this is gonna go and the way that it's gonna be spun, and at the same time, we don't need to address all of that right this second, right? The first and foremost priority is the families, is the community, and honestly, is taking care of ourselves too. Because there's only so much that can be done for these for these communities, you know, you can give your money on the the GoFundMe or the e-transfer that's set up. Um you can um, you know, physically be there if you know somebody in the area, you can physically like be there for them as a friend and a safe space to talk. Um, you know, you can check in on them and things like that, but like outside of that, there's really not a lot that we can do. And I think a lot of us feel really powerless in this situation, right? Because there's nothing that we can do to fix it right now, and so that's why we go to war um with each other and we start to infight about oh, it's this or it's that, and we need to fix this and this needs to change, and it's like none of that is creating like productive outcomes either, right? Like, if there is something that you feel strongly about that is happening as far as policy, that is happening as far as um, you know, mental health and the mental health crisis that we're having with children right now. Um, for those of you who who don't know, um, at the start of January of this year, there were two youth in our community who committed suicide. And um so there's been a lot of of signs pointing to there is a youth mental health crisis. And, you know, it has to do with devices, it has to do with social media, it has to do with absent parents, it has to do with our justice system, not incarcerating people who are committing crimes against children. Um, there's a lot that's in jambles right now, and so a lot of that stuff is like coming up to the surface, it is coming to the light, it is being seen, and even the Bible says, you know, do not partake in deeds of darkness, instead expose them, right? And so there is a need for this stuff to come to the light so that we can really look at it as adults and as stewards of our children and say, hey, like this needs to change, this is not working. Um, and that's all important stuff, but the reality of creating that change isn't on social media, and so when you get sucked into these social media debates, when you start to use that as your little soapbox to stand on to say, this is what I believe, or this is because of this, or this is because all trans people need to be locked up, um, which by the way is horrible. What an awful thing to say. Um like fundamentally, you can disagree with the policies, you can even disagree with the way that people live their lives, you can definitely disagree and fiercely fight the indoctrination of our children and the gender-affirming care and all of this stuff that statistically now we're seeing is leading to worse mental health outcomes than if they had never transitioned in the first place. You know, we can talk about the lies that these doctors are selling these kids of, oh, it'll fix all your problems. We can talk about the ones that have gone through transition and then on the other side of that been like nothing's better, or have poor surgical outcomes and complications, and then the doctor leaving them hung out to dry, there are countless testimonies of that kind of stuff happening, and so yes, that's all stuff that needs to be talked about, that's all stuff that needs to be looked at, that's all stuff that awareness needs to be brought to. Um, but again, there's no place for hate. And at the end of the day, getting caught up and fixated on what the media is or isn't saying, and on um, you know, the identity of the shooter and things like this, like those are not the things that are going to bring healing to the community that needs healing. Those aren't even the things that are going to make us feel good about what happened, right? Because there is no feeling good about what happened. And so, um, you know, the Bible also says knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. And when we think about it from that perspective, it's like, yeah, your opinions might be factually correct, right? Like there are parts of what you are saying that hold truth. But again, we need to be building each other up right now. We don't need to be winning a debate or winning an argument or saying, see, I told you so. I told you these policies were bad, I told you that this was an issue. That's not what we need right now. We need to be building each other up. And the policies, take those to the appropriate avenues. Because when you start to look at the world from a perspective of the enemy, Satan seeks to kill and destroy, and God is a God of restoration, God is the creator, God is the one who can redeem things and heal people miraculously, right? When you start to look at it in that understanding and through that lens, what are we actually doing when we're fighting with one another? We're seeking to destroy the other. Is that from God? And so that's my invitation to you. If you feel like you're getting caught up in, well, this is why we shouldn't be transitioning kids, I agree. And well, you know, we shouldn't be taking away guns because of this, like, you know, that person just shouldn't have had guns. I agree. Okay? Like I hear you and I agree and I understand. And at the same time, those are not the productive conversations to be having when we are in mourning. And so we need to rally together. We need to stop running from our emotions, right? Because I do the same thing. I'm like, you know, processing all of these different pieces going on, and and I immediately will take it and make it political so that I don't have to feel what I'm actually feeling. I can just channel that outrage into policy and government and what's wrong with the world. I do that. I am an imperfect person, okay? Um, but it's having the awareness of that tendency to want to do that, and then choosing something different. And choosing something that aligns with what our Lord modeled to us. That is really what's going to make the difference. That is how we can be the light in today's world. We don't have to compromise our Christian values. We can continue to move on and move forward and advocate for change that aligns with God's design, that aligns with the Bible. Um, but that doesn't, that doesn't justify the infighting, that doesn't justify being, pardon my language, an asshole on social media. Like it doesn't. And so I I just wanted to come on and talk to you about that. Um, because I feel like so many people are losing their humanity in this conversation. We're forgetting what really matters, we're forgetting the lives lost, we're forgetting the impact of what these families are going through, what the entire community is going through. Like Tumblr Ridge is a small community. They have less than 2,500 people there. So everybody knows everybody. It is very tight-knit. There is not a single person that lives in Tumblr Ridge that is not impacted by this tragedy. Whether that is a threat to their sense of safety in their community, whether that is personally knowing a victim, whether that is their own kids were in that school when that shooting happened, even if they came out physically unharmed. Like, let's look at the spiritual and mental and emotional harm that these kids are now having to pick up the pieces from, and that these families are now having to pick up the pieces from, right? Like, these are the things that we need to be thinking about and taking into consideration, especially as Christians, but as decent humans in general, like we need to be thinking about these things. We need to be thinking about those people. We need to put the humanity back into it. And I know that that's hard because it's easier to disconnect, it's easier to dissociate the humanity from the issue. And it's easier to go to war with an ideology than it is to sit in the discomfort and the loss and the pain of the people who have just gone through this. But true unity is being able to sit in the uncomfortable. You know, as Christians, we are called to speak uncomfortable truths. We're called to speak them with love, by the way. So if you're falling outside of the realms of expressing yourself from a loving and compassionate place, you need to look in the mirror. You need to look at yourself. Um, you need to pray on it and figure out how can I, you know, not compromise my convictions, but do so in a way that is loving. Again, not affirming. Loving. And sometimes loving is saying no. Sometimes loving is saying that's not right, or that's going to cause more harm. And that's why I'm against gender-affirming care, right? Like, there are things that just because we affirm them does not make us loving. And we need to like really get that straight. And the Bible is the measuring stick that we are meant to measure that against. But at the end of the day, even when we disagree, even when we share hard truths, we need to be coming from a place of love that was modeled to us by Jesus, who lived a self-sacrificial life and called us to die to ourselves. So it's not about your ego, it's not about you being right, it's not about your ideologies, it's not about I told you so. It is about being a decent human being, first and foremost, and uh continuing to fight the policy changes that need to happen in the correct avenues. You know, if you're in Canada, contact your MLA, contact your MP, like go through the appropriate channels, um, start petitions. You can start like legislative petitions to change the education system and different things in BC. Um you know, there are all these different avenues. And if you're not sure where to go, um you can contact me. I can I can direct you in the right in the right path and the right person to contact as far as like lobbying for these types of changes. But social media fighting isn't it, it's not productive, it's not loving, and uh it's really just creating more harm, more pain for the families of the victims and those affected. Um, and my invitation is. Just to remember that. So I will leave you with that for this week. I hope to be on here again soon. Um, and we'll catch you in the next one.