Muse & Mastery

Audacity Redefined & Self-Mastery with Mrs. Cynthia B. | Ep. 93

Aliya Cheyanne Season 6 Episode 93

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What happens when heartbreak is no longer the headline and your life becomes the story? On this episode, I sat down with author, mentor, and creative guide Mrs. Cynthia B to explore how personal responsibility, audacity, and intuition can turn pain into a blueprint for self-mastery. From unsent letters that became a first book to a thriving practice rooted in inner work, B shows how healing deepens when you stop outsourcing your power and start writing your own script.

We dig into the real timelines of growth—the unsexy, slow parts that compound when nobody’s watching. We connect creativity to spiritual freedom, honoring a practice that’s wide and elemental to claim a life that truly feels good. B also reveals her bold pivot from The Crimson Kiss to Audacity Redefined, and why shifting the foundation from men-centered healing to woman-centered self-development changed everything.

You’re not starting from scratch; you’re starting from experience.

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Festivities in Belize by RAGE Productions

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Mrs. Cynthia B:

So I found my resolve through accountability and personal responsibility. And that is the core of every message that I put out. It is personal responsibility and accountability for the role that you play in your own story, in your own movie, in your own life.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Hi everyone. Welcome back to Muse and Mastery. I'm so excited that you're here today, and I'm super happy and excited to be joined by a very special guest today, Mrs. Cynthia B. Hi Ben. Hey. How are you doing, girl? I am good. Thank you for having me. How are you? I'm doing good. Thank you for being here. So I am super excited for this episode because B has been my coach for over a year. She has been a mentor and a guide and a creative support system and a huge encouragement around a lot of the creative work that I've been doing from my subsack to working on surviving singleness, which we keep talking about it. It's coming. And even just putting myself out there more. Beyond being a coach, she's been an incredible sounding board and my friend in my head. And I'm just super grateful. And I shared with BB4 that it's been one of my dreams as a guest to have her on the show. So I'm really honored that she's here today to talk more about her creative career, which is longstanding, incredible as an author, as a coach, as a guide, as someone who is very spiritual and brilliant and a creative powerhouse in her own right. So I'm really excited today to talk more about her creative journey and the season that she's in today. So welcome to the show again, B. Thank you very much.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

It's so nice to hear myself described like that. I was like, do tell, keep, keep going, tell more.

Aliya Cheyanne:

I could go, I could go on and on.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Thank you.

Aliya Cheyanne:

But before we start to dive into our conversation today, I would love to kick it over to you to share a little bit more about who you are in the world today and how you'd like to be known.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So wow, you can tell that I've never been, not never been, but it's very rare that I allow myself to be interviewed. I'm like, what do I say about myself? Um I am a little bit of every woman I have met along the way who's inspired me. I am a very determined and audacious woman who loves to teach other women the principles of inwards and outwards that everything starts and ends with self. And that before you are out here looking at anyone else to give you anything to really hone in on yourself and make sure you're giving these things to yourself first. I am a coach, I'm a mentor, I'm a guide, but very specific to women who are committed to the art of self-mastery, essentially. Women who want to learn themselves, honor themselves, commit to themselves, show up for themselves and their lives in a way that makes it so they create a life that feels good for them, never mind what it looks like to other people.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. I think that's very true. And that's been my experience working with you so far. And I'm very grateful for that too. You've been an incredible sounding board in that way. So thank you for all that you do. I think all of that is fantastic, and it's a little bit of a minimization of all of the work that you've done for a very long period of time. So I would love to talk a little bit more about just your journey. You have been in the game for a very long time doing really transformative work, supporting women in different seasons of their lives. And I would love to zoom out, look over the course of your career and talk a little bit more about some of the through lines of your work and also the ways in which it's changing right now. So can you share a little bit more uh for folks who may not be familiar with your work? Maybe they're meeting you for the first time on this show, just what that's looked like for you.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

For sure. So I started, Jesus, 13 years old. I was 28 years old. I'm 40 years young right now. But I was 28 years old. So 13 years ago, I started The Crimson Kiss. And essentially I wanted to be an author as my childhood dream to be an author. And, you know, like most of our childhood dreams, life happens. We start to adult and we got to put that ish on a back burner so we could pay bills and survive. And I got to a point where in my old job, where I was like, this is, I can't, I can't, I can't keep doing this anymore. And I have to figure out a way from myself. And I really was, I'm very rebellious was a cause. And I didn't believe that going the traditional route of becoming an author. I just believed there was another way to do it. I didn't feel as though, like, who are you to tell me my book is good enough or not to be on the shelf, right? Or not even on a shelf, but to be in the hands of other women. So I got on Instagram, which I didn't want to do. I'm not a social media person. Always a late, I was always my friends who were like, you need to get on this new app. You need to get so I got on Instagram at a time where it was very much just budding. And um I at the time it was, I'm sure you know the names like Horatio Jones and like Melissa say something, like RH Sin, like all these people. And they were, they would have these like little quotes. And I was like, what is this?

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

And I started to realize, oh my gosh, these are people who they write their own books, right? So I started to do some research and I found the world of self-publishing. And I said, Oh, cool. So I taught myself how to do that because I did reach out to people and asked for help and nobody responded to me. But that's okay because I'm not entitled to a response from strangers, and that's fine. I figured out how to do it myself and I released my first book, Letters to My Ex February 29th, 2016. But I was building my brand, The Crimson Kissy for that. And and why I didn't even think of it as a brand at that time. I know that my sole purpose essentially was I had been through, you know, child, some heartaches with men. And at the time, they were so heavy for me. And I had written these letters, so I have this thing that I did and I still do, where I write letters to people when I'm very upset and I never send them.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

People who hurt me, people, whatever. I just write a bunch, just say whatever the fuck. And then I didn't send them. But I had a bunch of these letters in a box that I had written to an ex five years prior when we were together. And I said, Well, that's gonna be my first book. So I put them together and I made them a book. So the book was about my very real raw pain through a breakup, but then my very real raw resolve through this breakup. And that the breakup was a catalyst to my inner work, right? And the point of the book and the point of everything I do to this to this very day was to allow women to see, yes, this thing happened, but two things can exist at the same time. What did we learn? Right. And that also the relationships that we have with men are a direct reflection of the relationships that we have with ourselves. So if you are in a shitty relationship, there's some shit going on inside of you that absolutely needs tending to and healing. Right. Um, so that was the foundation of my the Crimson Kiss in a nutshell. I also am notoriously known for being extremely honest and for just kind of laying it on the line and saying what it is. So I found my resolve through accountability and personal responsibility. And that is the core of every message that I put out. It is personal responsibility and accountability for the role that you play in your own story, in your own movie, in your own life.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Did I answer your question? Of course you did. Okay. And just listening to you speak, a couple of things come to mind. We have talked many times about how like social media just ain't it. It's exhausting and all the things. At the same time, me personally, as someone who's chronically online, um, there is a trend or thing happening right now, particularly on Instagram where people are reflecting on like their 2016. And yeah. And it's so interesting that you mention your your first book, like Letters to My Ex, like the season that it came out in, the year that it came out in, and the way you're talking about how your work really encourages women to reflect, be honest with themselves about what's going on internally and how that's pouring out in their connections and relationships, really speaks to the arc of a lot of your writing work in the previous season, too. Um, as you've taught me, like as I've discussed with you as well in working on my own book, how much healing comes just from writing to the point where there are seasons where sometimes you gotta put it down, maybe do some other work and come back to it later. But it really just speaks to how you wrote and did so much work to heal yourself and how by extension that has really supported and helped other women on their paths to healing too. So I think that's really profound and powerful. And just the timing of it too. Like, you know, you and I have talked about in previous sessions the year of the sick and the shedding and everything else. And just we'll talk a little bit more later about how you're pivoting and how you're transitioning and rebranding, but it really is the season for shedding the old and ushering in the new. And I think you've done that so brilliantly throughout the course of your work. Um, I haven't known your work for 13 years. Like I've known you a little bit later, like maybe the last few years, but you found me in a season where I was navigating heartbreak and I really clung to the crimson kiss and the lives and all of that stuff. It forced me to reflect and to journal and to think. And then later through group workshops and one-on-one time, I've learned and grown so much more. And I'm grateful for that. So, as someone who's a client, who has been a client in the past, just really grateful and um just a testament to your work. So thank you. I appreciate you. Thank you so much. I appreciate you. And I'm so proud of you. Thank you, Cece. You're welcome. You're the best. So I want to talk a little bit more about your audacity and your audaciousness. So I always try to pick a word of the year, basically. And in 2024, my word of the year was audacity. Like last year it was devotion. This year it's healthy because I'm trying to get my life. Um but I love audacity. I think it's so important. And I love that you're leading with that now in your work and also in the clients and the women that you're calling into your sphere and your orbit who are aligned and on a similar path. And I think it's incredibly audacious to be a creative woman and a spiritual woman in this world, in this capitalist and everything else that we are surviving. So I would love to talk a little bit more about how that shows up in your daily life, in your routines, in what ways like being creative and spiritually free has been medicine for you. Just any thoughts that come to mind around that?

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So I'm a Pisces, let's start there. I'm a Pisces, let's start there. And I am I am not a woman who likes to conform, and I am not a woman who likes to feel like I'm in a cage. So traditionally, my entire life, and it's funny because very early on in life, my mother was like, you are gonna make sure you get a job where you can be your own boss because you, and I was like, you're probably right. And I don't like to feel like I don't have a choice. Um freedom is very important to me to be able to disconnect with myself and to flow with myself. And obviously, this comes with discipline and structure in the midst, but the overarching theme has to be that I'm free to discipline myself or not. Yes. Right? To create the structure or not, right? That it is very much rooted in a choice that is coming from me and not that it is from someone else telling me, no girl, sorry, you can't take the week off. Sorry, I thought that PTO stood for prepare the others. Like I will listen, here's here's what's gonna happen. I quit. Like that's now you're gonna. Right? Like it's just it never it and it's and I understand sometimes in life you gotta do what you gotta do to, you know, sometimes you gotta use what you got to get what you want. But I understand that, but at the same time, for me, that can't be my constant, right? So there's that in terms of the freedom, and then it's also directly connected. I'm a very spiritual woman in uh my spirituality is free as well. So I don't conform to one thing, right? I'm not like I'm not religious by any means. I am tapped into earth, air, water, fire. Right? I'm tapped into the moon, I'm tapped into my cycle, I'm tapped into God, spirit, ancestors, Jesus, Mary Joseph, Mary Magdalene, Lilith, all of that, right? Like there's not just one way for me. So spirituality and freedom go hand in hand. And I also am very much of the belief that healing in and of itself is a spiritual journey. It's a spiritual thing because when you heal, you are reconnecting to yourself and you yourself are a spirit occupying a human-ass body, right? So you're connecting to yourself, and the more you're connecting to yourself, the more you are connecting to the elements around you, the more you pay attention to the way the wind shifts, the more you pay attention to the bark on the trees, the more you are more inclined to hug a tree and give it your secrets, right? The more you will telecrow what someone did to you and let them go deal with it, right? Like, but these are things you learn through your spiritual journey, and your spiritual journey is directly connected to your intuition. And I am of the belief and the knowing rather that women specifically are portals. We are the only portal through the direct portals to source energy. So, how can we not be spiritual? However, you want to call it, however, you want to connect to it, but how can we not be spiritual when we are the direct portal to source energy? We are the only ones who have it. Yes. So that's my thoughts on that.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. I agree with you. I talk about that often on the show and on SubSec about how nature in and of itself is my church. And I tend to be a bit more open-minded about things and connection and spirit. So that's another way that I felt deeply connected and aligned with connecting with you as my coach, because we can have these conversations in a way that is less judgmental than other spaces. And I completely hear you when you talk about how closely spirit and spirituality is connected to freedom. Because as creative women, as creative beings, that's so important to feel like we have the space to be and pursue and act and receive in ways that feel aligned to us. That's the only way that many of us who are creative can survive to be able to cultivate the lives and the days that give us the spaciousness and the freedom to pursue the things that we desire. So 100% stamp on that. I feel you, girl.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

And even that to be a creative woman and to decide to embody that is in and of itself an act of rebellion. And in and of itself is a very audacious thing to do. Because in a world where we are, something I always say is to put it in perspective for women, it is father time and mother nature for a reason. Right. You've never heard father nature is gonna do his thing. No, right? Like right. And so if you zoom out and you really listen to the term father time and mother nature, you realize that we are operating in a system as women who are meant to be connected to spirit, to nature by fathers, air quotes here, who are like, no, this is the time you need to be on. And we are we are conditioned to believe that this is how it needs to be, right? And when you decide for yourself that you are going to explore yourself, like, no, wait a minute, what if what if I didn't conform to you? Daddy, like what if I what if I didn't do that and I, you know, went barefoot in the grass and talked to some everything around me, right? That is moving and breathing, what would that feel like, right? But when you do that, you go against the quote unquote grain. And of itself is an audacious thing to do. And fear is a normal thing. I think it's very healthy. It's fear is trying to just protect us from it's just our brain trying to keep us safe, right? And I wish that more women would not let their fear cripple them or stifle them or keep them bound to the confines of father time.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Right? We can work together, but it doesn't have to be one or the other. Because essentially working together is the the masculine and the feminine, the yin and the yen, the shadow and the light, the wisdom and the ignorance, the soft life and the disciplined life. All of these things have to work together. You know, I say I'm a Pisces and And it's like my duality that calls for these things. But I also know that duality, multifacetedness, but duality in itself is something that so many women, regardless of when you were born, can benefit from. Mm-hmm. Right? So yes.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. I think that's so true, and we lose sight of that. You know, I low-key have uh ADHD. So, real quick, there's a podcast that I like. It's called Around the Way Curls. And in their intro, that's something that they say all the time. Duality is a thing. Like we have to be able to hold two truths at once. We have to be able to sit with cognitive dissonance and move through it. We have to always remember that there are two sides to every coin. And exactly what you said, like all the parts work together to serve a purpose. And when we remember that, when we integrate that, we're able to move forward. And there's a show that I like on Netflix. It's called The Sandman. It you know, it's about like mythological Morpheus, like, you know, the god that rules the dream realm and all these other god gods, like the endless, desire, destiny, like all these things. It's very much my speed. But in the final season, it's only two seasons long. There is an episode where the main character, Morpheus, is trying to right his wrongs, but prevent an inevitable death. And in doing so, he goes to his parents. No clue, no idea the entire series that he had parents. He's an endless, he's a god. He's not supposed to die. He's not supposed to, there shouldn't be anything before him, but there is. Who does he go to? Father Time. His father is strict and a little bit callous, not um as loving or deep as you would hope, but very much this figure of an authority figure, like a masculine authority figure that is very strict, does not bend, doesn't work out with father time. So who does he go to next? His mother. His mother is very obviously Mother Nature. She's in a garden, she's surrounded by lush greenery. Not the softest, sweetest maternal figure you would expect, but everything she says, she says deliciously, like with sweetness, in a way, in a way that Mother Nature would. And listening to you talk about like the yin and the yang and the masculine and the feminine, feminine, and the balance and the dance that we have to do at these sides, and like thinking about father time and mother earth, it makes me think of those examples, the duality, like the show, like how these figures are represented and how we can apply that to our own lives. So there's so much truth in that. And you spoke a little bit about what you had to unlearn on this journey as well. Like you had to move through fear. You had to unlearn the conditioning and the rules that we're supposed to follow. Um, and I think it's up for each individual to reflect on what they need to unlearn in order to move through a season of creativity and spirituality in their own right. So thank you for sharing that, Cece. You're welcome. 100%. I would love to talk a little bit more now about where you're headed. So you have always supported women with change and transformation. I think in this season, you're more focused on women who are feeling the call to level up and do that in a way that does not solely include, you know, relationships, toxic relationships. It can be a part of it, but it's not the totality of it. Like women who are looking to level up in other ways. Like there's so many other ways to level up in life. So I would love to talk to you a little bit more about what you think women misunderstand most about growth and transformation.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

I think that the thing that women misunderstand most about it is that it is not an overnight thing. I think that women there's an event that happens in a woman's life. Usually it has to do with a man, it just is what it is. Right? There's an event that happens and they're like, I need to change, right? And then they find spaces, teachers, mentors, coaches, guides, where they're like, okay, like I'm gonna do this. I think they're at the assumption that they're gonna come in and in two months they're gonna change their life. But that is not a real thing. Because if you have had example, remind me of how you are again, we're you're 30. Oh, I'm turning 34 in the 29th. Turning 34, right? Turning 24. So let's say you come, you're turning 34, and you're like, today's the day I want to change my life. That means that you probably have a solid 30 or 29 years worth of patterns that have been embedded in you. Oh God. Through whether it's directly or indirectly, that have through messaging, through whatever the case may be, that have shaped you and have also allowed you to survive, keep you safe, so on and so forth until those things have expired and you didn't know that they expi expired, and you're still doing the same thing that you did when you were eight. Right. That at the time kept you safe as an eight-year-old, but you did it so much that it became a pattern.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

That's not going to change in two months, right? We have to first, and you're not gonna come in and blab you don't know what you don't you think that one thing is an issue. This is what women do. They come in and they think one thing is an issue, and I'm just that's cute that you think that. Cool story. But we we uncover what the issue is as we go along. The thing you come in is the catalyst, but the real issue is embedded in the roots, and these are years and years and years and years of roots. So we have to unearth them and then plant new seeds and then tend to the soil and to the garden that's gonna grow. That is not an overnight thing, right? Whether you're doing that with uh assistance, right, with a guide, a coach, a mentor, whatever the case may be, or you're doing it on your own, you have to give yourself time to unlearn the old and relearn the new. We need space.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Right? We need to give ourselves time, space, compassion, grace. But we also, see, here comes the duality, got to give ourselves a kick in the ass and say we're gonna be committed to doing this, to follow through. Right? So I would say that is the biggest misconception that women have when it comes to this. I also will add that a lot of women don't realize the way that they have centered men in their lives so insanely that a lot of times women will be like, I want to do my inner work right there in their single seasons, and they're like, I want to do my inner work so that, you know, later on down the line, I will be right for, you know, man that I want. And I'm always like, no, you're still centering men, even in your own inner work, girl.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. Yeah. It has to be about you.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Even in your own inner work, you're centering a man that doesn't even exist. He doesn't exist. You don't even know if he's real. And more, moreover, everyone is not guaranteed a partner in life. So if that is your understanding of I'm gonna do my inner work so I could be good for another person, you are gonna be highly disappointed if you get to the end of the rainbow, so to say, and no one is there. This has to be about you for you, because of you. And everything else that comes in is a plus. It is if you have a Sunday and there's no cherry on top, you're like, oh shit, I wanted the cherry. But this Sunday's really good. You still won't eat this the Sunday and my food's really good. But if there's a cherry on top, you're like, oh, that love it. It's an addition. Thank you. Right? So you have to be the Sunday. Mm-hmm. These other motherfuckers is the cherry. Yes. You know? It doesn't make the Sunday, it just adds to it. Mm-hmm.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Mic drop. This is supposed to be my healthy season, but I really love that Sunday analogy. And and it's so true. Like, it has to be for you foremost. Like, yeah, that's something we talked about too. Like, even in your support as an author coach with writing surviving singleness, like, because I was I was having this issue with writing about it and talking about it as an individual and like really just wanting to focus on myself, my experiences, like how we can create our best lives. But there were later chapters where I was thinking about, okay, well, how can you apply this and add this toward dating? And I felt like I was in such conflict with my own idea because it was like, oh, this still kind of feels male center. Like, how can I be writing this from one lens and one perspective, but still like including this? And we talked about how it could make sense and how it could work and how it doesn't have to be the focus, but it's a it's a plus. It's the cherry on top of the Sunday. If you decide that that is the path you want to go down. And for folks who are not interested in that, who either want to remain single by choice or who find that circumstances are not leading them to their person, you still have to focus on being the Sunday. And just being able to talk about that has been really powerful. But also understanding that changes don't come overnight because just like you said, because as you know, even with working with you for over a year, like we know changes have not come overnight for me. Like I'm still groaning and figuring stuff out, but really learning to give myself the grace and the self-compassion to undo exactly as you said, decades worth of conditioning of patterns, either given to me by caregivers or like experienced, or I've done to myself and like choosing to do better, taking a moment to do better. So I think that's so powerful and so true. And one thing I want to talk about is I've been very interested in like healing, obviously, but somatically, like really living in my body. And I've noticed in moments where I felt like burned out by a job or a relationship or a career choice or whatever the situation is, like that burnout obviously can live in the body. I don't always recognize it as a growth point. Sometimes it just feels like exhausting, and that's all I can know that it is. But I would love to talk to you a little bit more around where our intuition comes in in those moments and where our discernment comes in when we're recognizing the difference between growth and burnout. Like, what does that actually look like?

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So you are not gonna know that you're growing while it's happening. You will only know that you're growing or that you've grown in retrospect, right? I'm gonna give this analogy. I do 12 to 15 K steps a day. And I started my Charlie, nothing. I've been trying to get into shape and do my thug thizzle, right? Yes. Um, but I made a commitment with myself that has a system. I'm gonna, okay, this is a long story. So let me just wrap it up. This part, this analogy, right? So a month and a half in, I'm getting frustrated because and I know better, but I'm getting frustrated because I'm looking in the mirror and I don't see any changes, right? I'm like, you still look the same. And I know I've been going hard and I've been doing very well with my eating and my work, I've been doing really well. My husband is like every day, he's like, babe, I can feel you. I could feel you getting smaller, I could feel you, and then I'm like, You can. Yeah. You can, you can feel that. And he's like, Yeah, I want to snug me to this thing, you can go, baby. I'm doing a thing. I'm like, Well, why can't I say it? Yeah. Like, thank you. But we're gonna see it, right? And so we're not going to it's going to be how it's gonna happen is one day I'm gonna take a picture of myself. I'm gonna look at the picture and be like, dang girl, you really did. You're doing the the thug thizzle, you're doing it, right? Like we look 10 pounds lighter, let's just right. But I'm not gonna see it in in motion. So I think that's really important for people to understand when it comes to growth, because a lot of women I I I I I have many, many clients who have that same sentiment. They're like, I'm doing the thing and I'm not seeing anything. And I'm like, what you don't see is that you're compounding, right? And eventually, in retrospect, you'll see how much you've grown, right? Yes. So that's one thing, one component I want to say about the growth thing in terms of our intuition and burnout. Burnout, so you had said earlier, you know, I feel burnt out when I feel burnt out from work, from this, from that, whatever the case may be. And that in of itself is where our problem is. We are associating our burnout on something else, right? But work is not burning you out. It is your inner knowing that you don't belong here anymore. You not listening to yourself is burning you out. It's never the thing, right? It is you not listening and you tolerating, tolerating, tolerating, tolerating. You're not listening to yourself, and yourself has been like, maybe since day one, mm-mm, girl, we should not do this. And you were like, shh, what do we like? And she was like, Okay, I'll tell you again tomorrow, right? And then every day she's like, hey girl, I don't think, hey girl, and you're like, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. And when they hey, and she screams and you're like, oh my God, I'm burnt out. This job is burning me out. Yes. But that's not what's happening. It's you ignoring yourself, is the thing that is burning you out. Because whether you are, you know, a lot of women are so disconnected from their intuition because they are so plugged in to other people, things, places, environments, right? They're taking their cues. This is why it's so important to be mindful of the people that you have around you, but they're taking their cues. We are influenced by the people that are around us. We are influenced by our social media feeds, whether you realize it or not. We are influenced by our four-year page, right? We are influenced, we are taking all this stuff in. And the more you are not paying attention to what is influencing you, the further you disconnect from yourself. It's taking you away from yourself. So obviously, when your intuition is talking, you're like, oh, shut up. What is this voice? It's like a gnat in your ear. And you're just like, get away from me. Right. But we all hear her, we all know her. We all just don't trust her because we are not, we are not doing the things we need to do to rebuild a relationship with her. Right. So you always know when a situation, an environment, place is not for you. We just ignore ourselves. And then we're right. I mean, it's like, I did not want to have a session today. This was not a session, this is an interview, and here you are. Yeah, yeah.

Aliya Cheyanne:

You're right. Go into that right now. You're right. Um, you're right. And when you said it, I was like literally, aha. Like, I have a friend, like one of my close friends, who's dealing with that right now, but I feel like her intuition has been pinging her for a while with work and it's just gotten to the point where it's screamed. And I've absolutely been there several times because I am a professional job hopper. But even in relationships and connections too. So it's true. Yeah. We know, we ignore until it gets Until it gets too loud.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

And now you want to blow up your life on a Tuesday publicly, and that's probably not the best thing to do publicly. So, you know, you know, you you but it's a it's like anything else, you know, it's a muscle that we have to use regularly so that it it works for us, right? And you can't expect to ignore your intuition for years and years and years, and then just one day, like, hey girl, okay, I'm ready to listen. She can be like, well, let's, hey, I'm intuition. How are you? Yeah. Okay, this is how it works, right? I always tell women, like, your intuition is your we are born. Once again, men have intuitions, it's fine. But nobody's like, well, you know what they say about a man's intuition. It's a nobody says that. And there's a reason why nobody says that. And they say, you know, there's nothing like a woman's intuition, because once again, we are directly connected to source.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Right? We are directly connected to source, and our intuition is a personal GPS. And I always say, you are inputting into your intuition like a GPS every day. And you don't realize that you're doing it. So every day you're like, okay, I want XYZ. Well, you saying that, your intuition was like, Bet, just like Siri does, and like, okay, in I know you guys, a lot of your probably your audience too is in the US, but I'm in Canada, so we don't use Miles. My right, my GPS would be like, okay, in 16 kilometers, turn right at the light. And I'm like going straight. And my GPS is like rerouting and will reroute me. And I'm okay, in five kilometers now, make a right. And I'm like, oh, I think I'm gonna go left. My GPS is like rerouted, right? Yeah. But in the same way that Siri will just keep rerouting you when you put a destination, your intuition will just keep rerouting you, right? Mm-hmm. You have to listen. You have to realize that you said you wanted something, your intuition is going to get you there, right? It's gonna take you on the path. And that path looks like you want to, we're just gonna use the fitness thing again because right. You want to feel better in your clothes, you want to look better in your look in the mirror, you want to lose 20 pounds, okay, whatever. So you type that into your GPS, your internal GPS, whether you realized it or not, and your intuition is like, okay, cool. You go to grab a bag of chips, and your intuition is like rerouting. Right? Rerouting, turn left to the fridge, grab an apple, right? Like rerouting, you know, and you're like, no. The whole day, your intuition is trying to reroute you back on the path, you know, no, don't have the chips, maybe have a pear, maybe don't put all that manga on the thing, maybe don't have the burger trying to reroute you, and you're just not listening. Right? You're just not listening. So you must listen. Yes. Right? And the more you listen, the better your relationship with your intuition becomes, and the more you are able to connect to your you you just know, right? Sometimes people talk to me and they're like, Oh, B like, how did you? I'm like, I just know. And I it's weird to say out loud because some people think you're a little crazy, or some people think, like, you know, okay, who does she? You think she is. I think that I'm a woman that worked very hard to realign myself with my intuition. And so when I say I know something, I know it for myself. It doesn't have to be for you, but I know it for myself. You know, what book did you read to know that? I didn't read a book.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Right? Dom your wrong, I love to read. But a lot of my stuff doesn't come from reading books. It comes from Yes. Right? So, and that in itself is a very audacious thing to say, right? Like I be knowing. You know? And then you'll you'll have people who will, well, you know, she's so full of herself. And my thing is as I should be, because who should I be full of? Who else should I be full of? If not myself, yes. Right? I should be full of myself so I can intentionally align myself with the course of my life that I want to be on. I should absolutely be full of myself. Yes, thank you.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So yes.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes. Listening and strengthening the muscle to listen. You can either take the path of least resistance, not saying that it's gonna be easy every time, like you'll still hit some bumps in the road, but you can either take the easiest, quickest, smoothest, most aligned path, or you can make your journey there much longer.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Or you can 100% because like my mom always says, a hard head makes for a soft ass. So yeah.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Okay. Exactly that. So you know exactly that. I do want to talk about the major rebrand and pivot that you're making in this moment. And you talked to us about the journey and the breadth of your career, where you are now and where you're headed. And I would love to talk to you a little bit more about what this rebrand and this pivot has looked like for you. Like what signs did your body and did spirit give you? And like, how are you navigating this big change?

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So, this is how I like to explain it. The Crimson Kiss, my old space, was a house I built on a foundation that centered men, essentially. And the reason why that it was is because we are healing and a lot of women are going through these breakups. And so I was what I didn't realize was I was teaching my pillars. I had my pillars in my house, inner work, personal accountability, personal responsibility, accountability, and shadow work on a foundation that was essentially about men and getting over men, healing from men, staying out of toxic relationships, red flags, so on and so forth. So that's what the bulk of my books are about, because my books were many chapters of my life where I was healing. Realized that the four pillars that I was trying to teach, a lot of women were like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, about these men though, right? And kept trying to pull it back to these men. But I had long outgrown toxic relationships. I had long healed from them, and I hadn't been in a toxic relationship, you know, for very many years as I was continuing to serve women who were. And everybody has their season and everybody has their, and that's fine. But I had long healed from those, and I was in a season of my life where I was more interested in and just womanhood development, the development of womanhood, navigating womanhood, navigating yourself. And so I realized I don't want to convince women. It started to feel like I had to convince women to like focus on themselves and not these mother focus, focus on themselves. And the more you focus on yourself, the more you align with yourself, the more when it is time to date, you'll know what to do, right? Or you'll be, I don't want to say better, better at it because you have a better relationship with yourself. So I said, after two years of feeling like I was convincing women, and this is another testament to even my own intuition, I was like, I need to start over. I need to start over in a space where the foundation that I lay for the house that I'm building and the pillars in this house is very clear that this is a space for inward then outward, right? And we are focusing here. We are focusing on the art of self-mastery, we are focusing on the art of listening to our intuition, the art of audacity, the art of discernment, the art of getting out your own way, the art of leveling up in your life, the art of stacking skills, the art of creating a life that you love, the art, all the arts, but but everything have to do with self. Right? I wanted to create a very selfish space purposely for women who need to want to realize they have to be in a selfish season of their life and redefine what that word means for them in the first place. Because a selfish is also another word, just like audacity, associated with something that is out of line, something that is bad, you know. Audacity redefined is the name of my new space.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Intentional, because a lot of women have a bad relationship with the word audacity, and rightfully so. We use it in shitty ways, right? He had the audacity girl to try to split the bill with me on the first day. He had the audacity to XYZ, right? But the reality is, no, as a woman, you need audacity to get the things you want out of life because no one's gonna give it to you. Yes. Right. And so similarly, selfish, you need to redefine what selfish means to you and understand that there are two sides of the corn. Selfish has a duality. There is selfish, that is sure. The we're gonna use the word negative here for whatever, right? The negative end. But you also need an element of selfishness to you so you can make space for yourself in your own life to do what it is that you want to do. Mm-hmm. Right. Like you really you need that. And so I wanted to, I realized in order for me to teach from a place or teach what I love from a place where I I have been for a while in my womanhood, right? I need to start over again in a new space where it's very clear that this is what we're doing and give women the choice, right? To be here. And it's fine. If you don't want to be here, that's totally fine. It's not your cup of tea. I ain't everybody's cup of tea, you know, saying I know that about myself, right? But my my error was in the old space trying to convince women to like to do that. And they were like, no, and that was wrong with me. So I moved.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Moved. And that is personal responsibility, accountability, my own shadow work, my own inner work in a nutshell. Yes.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. So and trusting your intuition. Trusting my intuition. And moving back to a space where you can feel free again.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

100%. Exactly. Where I can, you know, teach these elements, speak about these elements, and help women connect their own dots. Because something I always say is it's really about connecting your own dots. I am not eye on the fix your life, nor am I Miss Cleo. You've got to be a certain age to know who Miss Cleo was. But I am here to guide you as you navigate your journey of womanhood and as you unlearn what you thought being a woman needed to be, and learn what your journey of womanhood can be if you center yourself. What does that look like? Because a lot of women, it's not just that they center men in their lives, they center everyone else.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Everyone else except for themselves. And then they build up this resentment and this burnout, right? But essentially it's because you have made everybody else the main character of your motherfucking life, and they are coming in and they're obviously doing whatever they want because you scripted them that way. Mm-hmm. Right. You gave them permission to do that while you are waiting for them to give you permission to take back the rightful place in your own life. They're not going to do that because they benefit from the position that you gave them.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes. Making everyone else a priority in your own life but you. 100%. Right.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Yeah. And so that is what I am here for women for to help. A lot of women do not have big sisters. They don't have mothers. They don't have women in their lives, period, who reflect this stance. They don't have women in their life period who have done the work and who can guide them through a journey of womanhood that involves them centering themselves. And that's what I'm here for as a woman who has done it, continuing to do it, who understands how the difficulties of it, but that also just because something is hard, it doesn't mean you can't trust yourself to get the shit done. Right? So that's where I am now.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes. And it's a beautiful space to be. Thank you. Thank you very much. Building on everything you've shared about your own journey, listening to your intuition, listening to your body, reclaiming and redefining being selfish, being audacious, and all of these tools that are built into us innately as human beings, but especially and particularly as women. For the woman who's listening right now, who wherever she's at in her life, she's feeling like, okay, this thing in my life, whatever it is, is complete. Like I need to move forward. What would you say to her in terms of honoring an ending without rushing into the next beginning? What would your advice be?

Mrs. Cynthia B:

I'm gonna give the advice that I just had to give to myself six months ago. And that is going to be you are allowed to outgrow a new space. And now you are not starting over from scratch, you are starting over from experience. So that experience comes with earned wisdom. What did you learn from where you were? Take your time so you can create where you want to be or where you're going from that earned wisdom, from that experience. You are not in a rush, you're not in a rush, you're not in a rush. Take your time, write your heart out right in the morning, right in the evening, and underneath the moon, skin a marinky dinky dink. Okay, write, connect your dots, allow your mind to catch up to the identity that you are stepping into right now. Right. So if, for example, one of my things was I'm an over-teacher. I over-teach and I overgive. Right. I'm very much, these are two things that have traveled with me since I was nine years old. That I'm still to this day constantly having to catch myself. Hey, no. Hey, no. It's like having a two-year-old, hey, no, cut that down. No, right? You just repeat it over and over again. Right. Those things about me were in healing, but they're a part of me, and I have to constantly continue to heal them. So because I used to over-teach and over-give, that burned me out. That frustrated me. And so this identity, right? This space, this brand, this level of my teaching experience, I've honed it in. Right. So I'm not in a rush. I don't have to overgive and I don't have to over-teach. Right? Yes. I don't have to do any of that. This season of my life, we're tighter boundaries, boo-boo. Right. You have to put on a little timer for yourself and be like, oh, that's it. That's enough of my teaching today. Bye. And that's then that's what we're gonna, but bye now. That's what we're gonna do. Right. But you have to remember that when you're coming from one thing that you're used to and you're going to a new thing that you know you need and that you're creating for yourself. Do not be impulsive. Take your time. You are going to be okay because you are starting over from experience and earned wisdom, not from scratch.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

I've been talking to myself a lot. It's a whole lot of this. It's just like I tell my story. It's in, you know, page 79 of this new journal that I have.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yeah. That even just listening to that just felt really good to my spirit. And I know anyone listening, like you listening on the other end of this, I'm sure that resonated too. That's really powerful. Thank you for that reminder that we're not starting over from scratch. We're starting over from earned wisdom and experience because it's very true. As much as we've had these many decades of conditioning, like the work that we are doing to unlearn certain things and to build new habits and new skills matters and counts. A hundred percent. And it's not irrelevant. It's as important as anything else. So B, this has been so incredible. I'm so honored that I got to sit with you and have this time. I know you don't usually do this. I appreciate you. I appreciate you for holding space for me to have this conversation. Such an honor to have you on the show, to let folks get just a taste of what I've experienced as a client for over the last year, and I'm just deeply grateful for you. Can you let folks know where to find your new space, where to support your work, where to learn more, how to work with you, all the things. Absolutely.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So, first of all, I appreciate you for having me, Aliyah. Thank you. Um, I appreciate you a lot. I am honored. I'm honored to have witnessed your growth in the last year. And I'm honored to have been able to be a part of one of your navigation tools. Get emotional? Me too, girl. Me too. Me too. Um it's an absolute honor. This is this is my life's work because to watch women like you, my other clients too come in for razzled. Like absolute and sometimes even defensive to watch you transform into giving yourselves more grace, understanding yourselves better, and being more clear is why I do this. This is worth it a hundred percent. So I'm very proud of you, Aliyah. And I know that our sessions are coming to a break. Yes. So you can take the semester off and go into some other spaces. Um, and I'm rooting for you, but moreover, I know that what you have accumulated is your own earned wisdom and that you will be phenomenal. And I'm very proud of you. Thank you, B. You're welcome. Thank you. That said, you can find me at let them know. Let them know. Uh, that said, the new space is called Audacity Redefined. Audacity redefined will be able to be on any podcast you listen to. For right now, I am taking my time. So you can find the email list. I'll give you the email list, Aaliyah, and you can link it in your show notes. Yes.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yep.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

When you come into the email list, you will be brought through a workflow that is intentionally specifically made to help you work on your own shit. So do the workflow. And then I will obviously send an email to let people know when Audacity Redefined is officially launched. I don't have social media of any kind because I'm off that also. I've included all my apps. And so there won't be no social media. It'll be my email list and my podcast. So you can find me if you want to work one-on-one with me uh in mentorship coaching at audacityredefined.com. And I do have a second podcast that's live right now. It is a tarot podcast because I do do tarot and oracle. Why am I Pisces? Why wouldn't I? Yes. And I honor my dualities. So different places for different things. And that podcast is called Subject to Interpretation, where I do just messages of the day every day. Calm down. Sometimes I miss some days because I'm human. I'm gonna stop saying that. I'm gonna stop saying every day. And then two days later, people are like, B, where are you at, girl? I'm like, ah, life.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Uh you know, be back next week.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Um I couldn't get time to, you know, to record. But um but the point is mostly every day. The more you laugh, the more it's making me laugh. Like mostly everyday child, okay? Where I give just messages of the day. And the thing to know about me, I think it's really important for your audience to hear. These are not the way that I pull cards and the messages I give are very much in alignment with how I speak in every other realm of my life. Uh, you're not gonna get some bullshit ass karmic twin flame. You know, abundance is coming in. I don't do all that shit. I'm not here to stroke your ego. I speak to my core foundation is about inner work, personal responsibility, and accountability. So that is what I lead with. Sometimes it's gonna hurt your ego, but I'm not in the business of soothing egos. I'm not in the business of lying to women, and I don't support women lying to themselves either. So everything that I say is never sugarcoated. And, you know, like I say, move your triggers to the side so you've got room to open up your mind.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

So that's that part. Um, subject to interpretation can be found on all podcasts that are available. That has no social media either. It's just the podcast.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes, perfect. And I will link everything in the show notes. So all of your links will be in the episode description. It's been incredible having you on the show, and I can't thank you enough. It's my pleasure. Thank you for having me and for all the ladies listening.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Knees to chest and go be great.

Aliya Cheyanne:

Yes, that part. That part.

Mrs. Cynthia B:

Put yourself in a position to get the things that you want and you will get them eventually. That part. And be audacious enough to do it. Have the audacity of the part. Thank you, B.

Aliya Cheyanne:

You're welcome, Aliah. I appreciate you. I appreciate you.

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