The Speech Source
Mary Brezik and Kim Dillon are two pediatric speech-language pathologists with over 25 years of combined experience. As speech therapists, we are often the first professionals to assess young children once they are referred by their pediatrician. Either they are not talking well or they are not eating well. We get to know our patients, their families, and how they are developing. We have a front row seat during the first critical and formative years of development for those who receive our services. Because of this, we have developed relationships with other professionals, observed what parent questions and concerns often arise, and see a need to share the resources and information we have compiled over the years. Join us as we dig into topics that show all of the overlapping aspects of child development and intervention. We invite you to be a part of our collaborative platform as we discuss, learn and grow for the betterment of our kids!
The Speech Source
S3E4: Elevating Everyday Fashion with Stylist Betsy Beaman
In this episode, Kim and Mary talk with Betsy Beaman, the owner of BBeamanStylist, a personal stylist and consultant business. Betsy shares her journey from working in the nonprofit sector to creating her own styling business, offering valuable insights into the challenges and joys of entrepreneurship. She discusses how her early career in communications and donor relations, particularly her time at the Presbyterian Night Shelter, pushed her outside her comfort zone and provided life lessons that shaped her passion for helping women express themselves through style. Betsy emphasizes that her approach to fashion goes beyond following trends—it's about finding what makes her clients feel good and confident. Reflecting on her first memorable fashion experience in sixth grade, she highlights how those early lessons still influence her philosophy today.
Betsy’s motivation is to help women find confidence and joy through style, making personal styling attainable for busy women who may not prioritize themselves. She opens up about the ups and downs of building a business, including self-doubt, imposter syndrome, and the challenges of balancing motherhood with entrepreneurship. She emphasizes the importance of staying true to her mission and finding mentors and support systems. Throughout the episode, Betsy provides practical style tips, such as making small wardrobe changes—like switching leggings for jeans or adding accessories—to elevate one's look while maintaining comfort. She explains how small physical shifts can positively impact a person’s mindset and mood.
Betsy discusses her commitment to authenticity in her business, rejecting the influencer trend of pushing products that don’t align with her clients’ needs. Her goal is to build a business that not only supports her family but also sets an example for her daughters, showing them that women can create successful businesses on their own terms. She emphasizes the importance of having a clear business plan and staying accountable to one’s original mission, pivoting when necessary but always holding onto the core vision.
Listeners can connect with Betsy on Instagram at @bebeemanstylist or visit her website at bebeemanstylist.com. Tune in to hear Betsy’s authentic approach to style, business, and life—and be inspired to find joy in your own journey. If you’re ready to elevate your wardrobe and discover your style, reach out to Betsy for a consultation or explore her tips on Instagram. You can find her on Instagram @bbeamanstylist or visit her website bbeamanstylist.com.
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Today we are talking with Betsy Beeman. She owns her own company called Be Beeman Stylist, where she is a personal stylist and a consultant, and Betsy has a degree in communications from Dallas Baptist University and has experience with marketing and operations with many different companies. She is a wife to Sam and a mom to two beautiful little girls. Her oldest just started kindergarten this year and we are really excited to talk with Betsy today just about how she got to where she is right now and starting and creating this business, her passion. And I know Betsy personally from an organization in the community Presbyterian Night Shelter, and I know Betsy personally from an organization in the community Presbyterian Night Shelter, and I will never forget, Betsy, what was your official role there?
Betsy :Official was director of communications, but it was also donor relations, donor maintenance Okay.
Kim :Yeah. So I was on a committee where we were doing some fundraising. But I will never forget meeting you for the first time was when you gave the tour of the men's shelter. And they have actually redone the men's shelter and it's great. But just think of a men's homeless shelter Like this is just an interesting place to be.
Kim :And you have cute little fashion, cute style, betsy, giving these tours in this building with I don't know how many men, but I was very enthralled with the whole process of where I was. But I really was distracted with Betsy because it just didn't go together to me. So to see where you are now, it just makes so much sense to me because that was who you are, even outside of the company that you run. Now you were living. That that's who you were, just your unique style and the way that you were able to present yourself in any setting, and it showed even in that. So that is my initial kind of introduction to you and it has held true over the last several years and so I'm just really excited to get to talk to you today. So welcome, betsy. Thank you.
Betsy :First of all. I think that's the funniest story ever, because I've been in nonprofit, honestly, the majority of my career and so I've been in those settings before. But I'm in fundraising, so the fundraiser girl is the fun girl that gets to go do activities and raise money and go to fancy galas. And when I stepped on foot at PNS, initially I thought, new challenge, this is different. And when it was, hey, you're going to be giving tours, you're going to be doing all of these things, it pushed me so far out of my comfort zone. But I really enjoyed it because I could finally piece together why you need to help these individuals, because here they are, they're trying hard, they're getting jobs, they're not just sitting on the streets, and so I did love it so much.
Betsy :But I shifted my wardrobe very dramatically. From week one or two I think it was the first month that I was there I came back and said pants, any pants. I hate wearing pants. To be honest with you, I love dresses, but it just wasn't the setting for that. And so I learned so much and I'm grateful for it.
Betsy :But I love that. That's how we connected and I'm so grateful to be here. I've loved everything that you're doing and I just I love this topic of giving voices to women who are trying new things, voices to moms to get jump out of their box, to do something uncomfortable and you know, what I know to be true is some of us don't have the same personality or the courage to want to do that. But when we can hear other women being open and honest and talking about the good, but also talking about the bad, I think it can inspire people. I think it can push that person who's been wanting to start their own business for 10 years. They just never had anyone to really give them that push. So I just love what you guys are doing and I'm so grateful to be here.
Mary:This will be awesome to have you on today because, I said, kim and I do our research before we have you on, despite knowing some backstory, of course walking in. But you are a really fascinating person and I am really interested to hear. Before we get into all the things that we want to get into with Be Beeman, I think we need to start from the beginning because you have done so much like you even said, with Presbyterian Night Shelter that really paved the way for you to be able to do what you do today. So can you tell us a little bit about your background? I know you have a marketing background and communications. Tell us a little bit about what that first job was for you and walking through what you did in the nonprofit world.
Betsy :to start off with, Every time I think about it too, I'm so thankful for all the opportunities. Surprisingly enough, I've just met the most amazing women who have taken me in and nurtured me, and so whenever I started, I graduated right when the recession hit, like the recession of 08. It was so scary. The only job at the time I could get was a hostess, and I was terrible at it. I was a Cool River Cafe hostess and I was awful. And finally I was like, okay, I'm from a really tiny town and I was faced with do I move back home and try and make something like that work, or do I try something different? And so I had seen the nonprofit.
Betsy :I grew up with both my parents active in just volunteering for charity. They're just the kindest people I've ever met and I always knew they got the most joy by serving others. That's just a theme in my life. I get joy by being around other people and I get joy by helping others. So I saw this position that was helping individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities, and it was in Arlington. I was making $27,000 a year At the time. I just remember telling my dad how do I do this? Because, again, the economy was in the crapper. And so my dad was just like things will happen. But you got to hustle. And I just remember being like, okay, I got to hustle and what my job?
Betsy :It started as just a customer service rep right, it was just me answering the phone, doing payroll but what I noticed was it was these very complex Medicaid programs for individuals who have intellectual developmental disabilities, and I just noticed people having more questions than answers and I just wanted to learn everything about it so I could help them. There was a position it was a client coordinator position and we would go out and help individuals understand that they have these services. But so many people don't know about them and they're so complex, and so what I did was at the time I was like I got to make more money because I'm making nothing and I need to work my way up. But to work your way up I need to learn everything. So I learned everything about Medicaid and I figured it out, and my favorite thing was these programs really help people. They help people stay in their home instead of going into an institution or a nursing home, and so I worked my way up a little bit in that program and then started to go into individuals' houses, and it could have been anywhere from multimillion dollar homes with a child that was born with spina bifida, whatever it was, or it could have been an elderly woman who, honestly, is able to stay in her home. She's just paralyzed from the waist down and she needs assistance every day. But that opened up my eyes into a world of individuals who just need help. Now, these were really complex issues, but I could find a way to connect them, even if I couldn't provide them with it physically myself. I could find a way to connect them with that, and that's when I think my passion around really being involved and helping people just took flight.
Betsy :I was lucky enough to have a great mentor. The CEO she's still there today took flight. I was lucky enough to have a great mentor the CEO she's still there today. Vicky, she molded me, she taught me how to be a leader. I love her so much. But she opened the door for me to fail when I needed to. But she also opened the door for me to find new opportunities and learn and grow.
Betsy :I was immature. I was just right out of college. I went to a private Baptist university. I was very sheltered, to be honest with you. So there was so much I needed to learn and she gave me that runway and so really started that nonprofit career there and essentially fell into fundraising and development.
Betsy :Because I think people would be like we, like you on the social service side, but you like talking, don't you, and you want to go talk to people about how we need money, and I fell into that a little bit. I knew some of it, obviously, but a communication degree can take you wherever you need it to go, if we're being honest right. So I stumbled into fundraising also, but what I loved about fundraising was getting people who had no idea about the organization or about this complex issue and getting them to care about it. Even if they didn't have a family member that had a disability, I didn't care. I could tell you the story of these amazing warrior people that I was in their home, I was seeing what they were doing every day and I could tell you that story. And as long as I could tell you that story, you've heard it and now you may want to help them, and so that became my passion of helping people. Tell their stories is probably the best way. You can never fully tell someone's story if it's not you, but giving them the tools or providing them with something to help them tell their story is really where my communication and nonprofit world collided.
Betsy :And then I spent some time in New York, which is a beast in and of itself. I don't know how many people are like born and raised in Texas, but if you didn't have a ring by spring at my college, you were just like big L loser type of vibes, like it's great now, it's totally fine now, and I love that for people. But I didn't have any prospects, and so I had someone who said why don't you try somewhere new? And I was. It was in between California and New York and I'd never been to either of those places, and so I thought somebody, tell me something different and I'll go there.
Betsy :Someone said if you go to New York, you don't have to have a car. I convinced my parents by doing a PowerPoint presentation to let me sell my car. I packed up all my belongings and I moved to Manhattan. I was there for almost five years, was in the heart of the city for three years and then moved to Queens Astoria, queens for two, and that really. I've always been passionate about clothes, that's just. It's one of my favorite things I can remember. Someone had asked me what was my first experience of yeah, that's what, that's cute, I like that. And it was when I was in sixth grade and I saw these leggings and they were like black background but just floral everywhere and every color you could imagine.
Betsy :Nowadays we're going to be like no those are a no-go, but in sixth grade I just thought they were the coolest thing ever. I had a really cool mom who was very just fashion forward but in her own really unique way, and she was like let's get them. And I remember her asking what I would pair it with. And I paired it with a bright yellow old Navy fleece sweatshirt and I was a vibe and I remember someone making fun of me that day and when I got home I just thought, but this is a dope outfit, like why would you make fun of me? This is an awesome outfit. And again, from there it was like I just I'll wear whatever I want. I'll do it, especially with clothes. But in New York it was like everybody's wearing whatever you want to be.
Betsy :And and the most beautiful thing was you would move from neighborhood to a totally different world, and I was entranced by that. I loved that. Everybody was different. You weren't put in a category of you can only be here. You can only be here. No, you could be whoever you wanted.
Betsy :If one day I wanted to dress the most conservative I've ever dressed fine. If the next day I wanted to wear underwear and a t-shirt, I could also do that, and to witness that was really beautiful and amazing, and I think it was in that moment where I realized that, for me, personal style is a way to express who you are, and I had always been really passionate about that, and it just took me a really long time to finally embrace that and make it a career. If you will. Right, I'm still working on it, but my evolution of like how I got here can really just be summed up into I love making people feel good, and I wanted something that was tangible to make people feel good, because we live in a world right now that's hard. We're constantly surrounded by what looks pretty on your phone, right, but that might not be someone else's reality, and so I just wanted something tangible and maybe a little easy right when we think about okay, I need to get better, maybe I'll go to counseling Counseling's hard I need to get better, maybe I'll try medication.
Betsy :That's also hard. These are all really hard things to wrap your brain around. But if clothes clothes might not be that hard, we're talking about a tiny shift every morning. So I wanted something that felt easy for someone and not as overwhelming to think around transforming themselves, not just like counseling or whatever it is. I just wanted something that was easy, that we could talk about, be fun still and not so heavy or so serious, to help them understand that it can be a tiny shift in what they do that changes everything else for them mentally. So I would say that's where my brain started to go around. Even in the nonprofit world, I just started to notice if I used my voice and use something tiny like what you're wearing every day, I could really make that impact that I wanted to make.
Mary:I love that you remember those leggings in sixth grade. I really got a good mental picture there I'm picturing right now, maybe at Justice, or Limited 2 back in the day, limited 2, yes, I love that story, though, because it makes so much sense when I see your business now and your underlying tone.
Kim :You give great tips and suggestions that are so applicable, but it's always styling yourself for who you are and what you feel good in, and not necessarily what everyone else is saying and what the trends are, and that so goes back to you in that outfit, because even when someone made fun of you, you're looking at yourself and you're like, no, but I like this and I want to wear this and I feel good in this, and I think that's really what you're trying to teach people in your business is how to find that within themselves, what their style is, and I just think that really ties together. Now that you shared that story and I do hope you can find a picture- of that story.
Betsy :I know I need to. I need to Making things so complicated when we already have such a complicated life and world. Don't make clothes complicated. I'm trying to remove these rules and these trends, to just ask yourself what do you like. To just ask yourself what do you like? And if what you like are you know now at the time, hideous floral pants like, let's wear them. Let's find a way to make them a little bit more versatile. Right, maybe not always the old Navy, bright yellow fleece sweater, but let's find a way to wear them that fits who you are, that makes you feel good, and I think clothes and the way that you see yourself in clothes can do that on a really small level. That can help everything else feel less overwhelming.
Mary:Does that make sense?
Mary:Definitely, and I think there's a lot to that, especially.
Mary:I know Steve Jobs has written about the whole idea of why he wore what he did every single day and the idea that there is so much mental energy that you have to put into what you wear every day that reflects on you and your style and whatever that several CEOs have just decided. You know what? I'm not going to put that energy into it and this is going to be my uniform every day. But for most of us who aren't running Apple, we don't have that luxury of deciding I'm going to wear the same thing every day. We're definitely more versatile than that. What would you say is the oh, the most universal, is the most universal uniform, if you will, for the modern mom who might be running in between school pickups and carpool but then also be meeting with some kind of client or patient in between and then running to a birthday party afterwards? What is that kind of general uniform, if you will, that makes somebody feel good what is that kind of general uniform, if you will, that makes somebody feel good.
Betsy :I like people to challenge themselves a little bit, but not so much that it doesn't feel like you. So one of the biggest things that I find, especially for working moms heck, stay-at-home moms is that we can't get out of this athleisure wear every single day. Because, number one, we can't get out of this athleisure wear every single day because number one it's insanely comfortable. I get that. It is very easy, especially when you are just barely making it right. So what I like to say to I get this question all the time. It's like how do I get out of my leggings? Instead of thinking about it as a complete outfit overhaul, think about it as what one piece, whether it is an accessory or an article of clothing that you could switch out, that you're wearing right now from your day to day. That could just slightly elevate it. So I think the best example I could give is this crusade of I hate jeans. I don't know, I don't know why people don't like to wear jeans. It is what it is.
Betsy :But think about if, every day, you're wearing a workout top and leggings and tennis shoes and you're going to a birthday party, like you said, or you're going somewhere happy hour and you're wanting to look a little bit more elevated? Instead of the leggings, throw on a pair of jeans. It can even be jean shorts. It's a billion degrees outside. You still get to keep the comfort of the t-shirt right. Still keep the fun tennis shoe as well, but throw on something that just feels a little bit more elevated. It feels less comfy at the beginning, but when you are out and you've only changed that one piece, heck, it could be putting on necklaces and some earrings. Forget the jeans. Keep your athleisure wear on. Put necklaces, earrings on, Grab a fun bag, Find a cute baseball hat.
Betsy :So it's just these little shifts, Just try it. All I want you to do is push yourself just a little bit to try something. Because of all the research I've done and all of my clients, they notice not only do they feel better, but this isn't that uncomfortable, this isn't that bad. This little shift has made a huge difference. Right, there's not ever a perfect outfit, but for me, if something ever feels off, ever a perfect outfit. But for me, if something ever feels off or you're just this, ain't it. I wear this every day. Take one piece of the entire outfit and change it to something that you never would have thought before.
Kim :Sometimes we just need to change in something simple like our clothes or outfits to help us make a little change or shift in our life when we're feeling stuck or when we're feeling tired or not motivated. You're right, the little physical changes like that can also have an overall effect on all the other things that we're going through.
Betsy :Yeah, and I'm not a proponent of hey, deny everything. We've all tried it, right. We've all been there where sometimes we're like I'm just going to bury that, right. But we call it little T trauma. So I'm not necessarily saying, okay, listen, forget about everything and just wearing new clothes will fix you. It won't, but really what it will do is it'll shift the chemical imbalance in your brain a little bit because you're starting to think about yourself a little differently. When you start to wear the same thing over and over again and it's not flattering or you don't like it and you're not getting any affirmations from anyone, you get down in the dumps is what my mom always called it. You're down in the dumps, vets, and you get that way. So, even just that little shift and trying something new, there is power in what it does for your brain and that's just something that I think clothes can do in such a simple way, even if it is like a cute baseball hat. Keep everything else on, keep feeling comfortable, keep wanting to wear athleisure, wear. Throw on a cute baseball hat. Find a cute colored bag that brings out the color of your tennis shoes. Right, let's say you're not a really big fan of dresses. Find a pair of cute colored tennis shoes, right, don't just go with a white or black pair of tennis shoes. What's your favorite color? Is it blue? Find a cute pair of blue tennis shoes and just try and see how that makes you feel, because if you're not trying it, you don't really know.
Betsy :And that's my biggest thing that I think a lot of my clients start to notice is they'll pull something out of their closet and they'll say I haven't worn that in forever. And I'll say let's put it on. And we put it on and we dive into it. Why'd you buy it? I really like the color. Okay. What do you like about the fit? I hate the fit. That's why I never wear it. Okay. So what we're noticing is this isn't the right fit for you, but you love this color. So let's find what is the right fit and go buy it in that color.
Betsy :So it's just these little things that I do think it takes a little bit of energy up front. But once you hit that stride, you're like okay, I love blue, but I know V-neck is really bad for my broad shoulders, so I'm going to look for a blue crew neck t-shirt. And once you get to that point which I've seen so many of my clients do. We start making breakthroughs, we start getting to the point of well, they're not therapy sessions, but I'll be in a closet detox. And they'll say I just honestly haven't thought about myself since I had our kids and I really want to prioritize myself. And we started with us just throwing away a pair of jeans that don't fit them anymore. And we started with us just throwing away a pair of jeans that don't fit them anymore. But it's just those little light conversations that can move into some of the heavy stuff, but really starting to just unpack it all and make you feel better about yourself.
Mary:Betsy, you are obviously so passionate about what you do and so good at what you do because you make it as you're talking. I was just struck by the fact that you make it so simple or sound so simple, but that's not in those questions that you're asking. Do not come intuitively to me as I look in the mirror or as I look in my closet, or overwhelmed by a store to be like, oh my gosh, what neckline am I looking for? What colors am I looking for? So I know that you're so talented in that way. Tell me a little bit about how this skill and this passion becomes a business model. How do you get the six-year-old obsessed with clothing and loves fashion and knows how to sell and how to read someone and get that marketing fundraising background? I see it all coming together now for being a personal stylist, but how do you turn it into a business?
Betsy :The first thing I will say is it takes courage and it takes the reminder that I am so thankful that I have, but it takes the reminder that I am loved, I am smart, I am kind, because I think just starting a business in general can be very difficult, but starting a business that is so personal and vulnerable to so many people can be even more challenging. I took inspiration truly from women like you guys that I'm blessed to be surrounded by women who just decided that they don't want to do what everybody else is doing and they want to do something for themselves. They want to build something for themselves. I joke, when I lived in New York, I became like a mini feminist, if you will, and then I created two beautiful, tiny little girls, and I also have a twin sister and an older sister and I've watched them struggle so much with self-confidence and struggle with wanting to do something but just not having the courage to do it or not having the mindset to do it. And I'm so blessed to be a part of powerhouse women who just said ethic, I'm going to do it and if else and if it doesn't, then I've created something pretty powerful and pretty amazing. And so I started the dream when I lived in New York and I actually was a nanny for a powerhouse woman. She was an executive at Weight Watchers and I just loved everything about her and her style was impeccable and she was so chic and we would go into Lord and Taylor and I would just watch her and she did not have any self-confidence issues. She knew what she wanted and I looked at her and I thought, yeah, I want to be that. I think that's pretty badass and I want to be that. And when I was blessed to be in a consulting gig called Collective Growth, I also witnessed a powerhouse woman named Marianne, who was the way she speaks to individuals, the way that she speaks life to people.
Betsy :I wanted to do that, but I wanted to do it in my own unique way and I wanted to take something like fashion that I love, that I find so fun, and I wanted to turn it into something that everybody could think that they could love it too, because I think there's a difference in a personal stylist or a stylist, a fashion stylist who's going and like styling Blake Lively right, that's not me. They're wanting her to be up to date on trends and the latest designers. I find personal style. I created my own definition for it of I just want you to finally feel good in what you're wearing and if that is not the latest trend that is a crop top, because you had two children and you carry all your weight in your midsection speaking of me just a tiny bit then that's okay, but we can find you something like that.
Betsy :So it was watching a business that I was a part of, a young entrepreneurial business, flourish, and it was also doing a lot for that business where I thought I can do this, maybe I can do this, I could try this. Back to my original nonprofit gig, I didn't know anything about Medicaid it's so complicated. Everything about it is is complicated. But what I knew was I could read about it, I could learn about it and I took my passion of just love loving getting dressed and created my business model around just wanting to love getting dressed, wanting to love when you walk out the door you feel really good about yourself. And I took inspiration, I think a little bit, from New York stylist that I really like and just decided to create that in this world that is Texas a little bit, but create it in a way that was I can do a service for you, like the closet detox. I'm going into your closet and we're cleaning out your closet, but also, while we're cleaning out your closet, we're building a narrative of who you want to be.
Betsy :I mean down to my style discovery quiz. It's long, but I ask you I want to know what your favorite color is. I don't really care what your hair color is. What's your favorite color? One of my favorite questions on my discovery quiz is what was an outfit you wore that made you feel your best? And the answers vary and I love that. But I get to know them in their wardrobe and in their closet in such a beautiful way. That is, yes, personal stylist, I pair outfits for you. I do all of those things, but we start to understand what you really like and that's what that's.
Betsy :The business model I wanted to create was, yes, personal style. Most people can get behind. I don't like what I'm wearing. I need someone to help me. But in our process that we go through, at the end you found what you like. You've dabbled into trends and what fits your body shape. You know what your body shape is now. Right After whatever it is that you've gone through, you know your new body shape, you know how to dress it, but you also know what you like and you have a better understanding and tools to have it not be, as you said, mary, overwhelming when you walk into a store. And that's how that business model started. It's really interesting how the ebbs and flow of just the business is.
Betsy :I'm in a fun stage now where I want to grow it, but I'm not sure how, and so in that instance I'm bringing in experts. Because let me just tell you my husband will say it I don't know finances. I don't. I'm bad at that. I'm horrible Y'all. I didn't have a credit card till I was 27 years old horrible Y'all. I didn't have a credit card until I was 27 years old. I just got a credit card with my own business name that I've never had before. So I'm lucky enough that I've been able to witness these amazing entrepreneurs build a business and learn from them their mistakes and their triumphs, but then also understand I can't do it all. So I'm going to bring in experts, like a finance person or a billing specialist, whoever it is, to help me fill in those gaps.
Betsy :And I think that's the evolution of kind of that business model.
Betsy :I knew what it was.
Betsy :I had my business plan.
Betsy :I have standard operating procedures, which a lot of people don't have those right now.
Betsy :But that was my background.
Betsy :That's when I knew.
Betsy :But now I'm okay.
Betsy :I need to. I need people to step in. I want to make sure I'm doing this correctly from a finance standpoint. I want to make sure I'm building the business the right way. So I think that's how the evolution was.
Betsy :It started with courage and then it was just get all the knowledge. You can learn everything, ask all the questions and start building it based off of my dream and my hope, which was to make people feel good, to make people happy and excited, to get dressed again and make it into a business that could support my family. And the main goal is so that my two girls, hattie and Ollie, can see that women can do this, that they can start their own business, that they can have a family. It's hard and they see how hard it is on me. I cry. I love crying. I love a good shower cry, but I cry. I share my frustration. They're little, but what I hope is in 10 years from now, they're going to see that I built something and I built it so that they could build something. Whatever they're passionate about, that they could build it too. So again the answer to your question, but like in a roundabout way.
Kim :You're targeting all the things that we want to know about just through conversation, so this is perfect.
Mary:I feel inspired, like we've got to just get on our to-do list today. Betsy is charging ahead in this world. She's got it.
Betsy :When I'm crying next week, like I'll call you too, cause I think that's my, I don't know That'll it'll probably be what I. Maybe what I want to talk about the most or what I want the girls to know is I'm not over here. Okay, who's ready to quit their job? No, I still have two other jobs. I'm not doing this full time. I'll send out leads, and one month I won't have any, and the next month I'll have 15.
Betsy :And so I don't want to paint a picture of yeah, look at me, I got my lap together. I do not. Yesterday, I wore my dress on backwards all day and I'm just thinking I'm so cool. No, but you can still do it, and it's okay that it's hard, because the hard times when I'm in it and I'm crying and I don't know what I'm doing or someone essentially made fun of me which that has happened before around my content those are hard days too, and I don't want to keep going sometimes, but what I know to be true is if it's bringing me joy and I still get I got a text yesterday from a client who said she just wore this outfit and she's never felt better then I've done.
Betsy :What I needed to do, and that's what I'm moving into a little bit is I just want us to be more open and honest with each other, and so I think that's a part of running any business, whether you're selling a service or you're selling a dream, whatever it is. To acknowledge that it's not sunshine and roses every day is to acknowledge that you could fail, but to be okay with it and to sit and be in those really difficult moments, because in the difficult moments is where you gain so much knowledge and so much insight about yourself, about your business. I've been a part of watching a hotel local hotel here be built from the ground up and it was supposed to launch right when COVID hit and the amount of money that was put into the money, the time 10 years in the making and then, all of a sudden, something happens that's completely out of all of our control. No one's traveling this industry the hospitality industry is tanking and to be able to watch these brilliant business individuals come through and say we're going to make it work, and see the failure, because I witnessed failure there, but how they recovered from it was powerful. And I think that, for me, is what I'm learning about right now about myself is how to lean into having uncomfortable conversations, whether it's Sam, my husband, having one with me, whereas, hey, maybe we try and hustle more. Whatever it is, he's so supportive, I'm so thankful. Or it's me having imposter syndrome. I have that Sometimes.
Betsy :I look at myself and I'm like, should I be doing this, but fighting through those feelings and sitting in them when you need to, instead of just burying them down inside, sitting with them, making it really difficult and hard, and then getting up the next day giving yourself that happy pep talk? I mean, I remember it vividly. We're in choir. There are two girls. One of them's name is Tiffany. I don't remember the other girl's name, but both of them telling me like how ridiculous I looked and how dumb those clothes were and it looked ugly and that color was ugly and I remember that night being really upset and I was crying. And then the next morning I just thought to myself I don't care, I don't care, I like it and it's what makes me happy. And as long as it can make me happy, let's keep doing it. And I have to have those pep talks with myself. I find myself having them more now than I probably ever have. But as long as I'm happy and healthy and I'm helping people, let's keep going Right.
Mary:So one question I had for you that kind of brings it up is I had worded it a little differently than making fun of someone. But what if you have creative differences with your clients? What happens? I'm sure this happens in literally every context. Yeah, you're helping start a hotel, you've got a lot of creativity in that room, but you've also got a lot of conflict and a lot of different ideas in that room. But you've also got a lot of conflict and a lot of different ideas. How do you handle that with the client when you might have a different idea of what looks good on her body than her? Of course, there's so much of that is very subjective, but there's also some objective truths as well to what looks good on a person, truths as well to what looks good on a person. And then how do you manage that conflict? Or just manage styling someone where, ultimately, the client is in control of what they choose to purge or purchase, and then you, as their stylist, though, have their name, your name attached to hey, I was styled by Betsy.
Betsy :So how does all of this work, yeah, but I think that's a real. I really liked that question, especially in my kind of like industry, because I am, I'm seen as the expert. But the way I've set up my business model is I'm I just want to be an expert in what makes you feel good. I'm an expert in your body shape. I know it looks good on your body shape right. But I'm not going to sit here and say I'm an expert and I know every single trend, micro trend. I don't know any of them. I know some of them, but not all of them. They change all the time.
Betsy :For me, conflict my process is. I tend to, especially if it's a closet detox process. So essentially what I do is we start I think this will help draw the picture a little bit but we have a conversation in virtual or in person, and I learn what I can about them. I learn what their needs are and then I learn what they want to get out of it. So in my mind I'm always remembering, even in times of conflict or in times where it's uncomfortable. I have in the back of my mind what's their end goal, what is it they told me that they wanted, and let's make sure we're on that path. But then when we do the style discovery quiz, it's all these different questions and I really dive deep into it and I tell them be as open and honest as you possibly can. So I've got such great information already that I find that to be such a great open door to you've given me a little insight.
Betsy :Let me give you a little bit of what I'm hearing you say, and that's a language that I learned at my old gig, because we did a lot of coaching. We did a lot of executive coaching and what you want to make sure is you hear what the person's saying and not interpret it for themselves. I don't know if I see as much conflict, but I see a lot of emotional attachment to why people wear what they wear, and the last thing that I want to do is make you feel sad for the decisions and the reasons why you picked that sweater. But I will tell you in a kind encouraging way that I am right. I will tell you I love this for you, but I just want you to notice how, if you shift just this one thing what it looks like on your body and I don't know, eight times out of 10, they see it the other two times. They don't, and that's okay. It really is okay. It's just little things, but I find my process to be more welcoming and open because I just want to know what they like.
Betsy :I don't really know, no one can see this, but I'm currently wearing a dress that has great peonies on it the dog peonies, whatever a dog that has all the hair and a pug with angel wings on it. No, not everybody wants to wear that. I love it because it's quirky and it's hilarious. I really like the fit. Not everybody wants to wear that. I love it because it's quirky and it's hilarious. I really like the fit, but not everybody wants to wear that.
Betsy :But we're stuck in this world where it's. You should wear this. Look how cute it looks on me. This may look really cute on me, but it's not going to look cute on everybody. So, instead of thinking around, this is what this girl was wearing. She was wearing this and it looks so cute. Okay, we'll try it. Let's try it, but it may not fit your body shape and if it doesn't, let's find something that looks similar that might fit your body shape. So I think it's just the way I shift the perspective around clothes and move it more towards what makes you look good, instead of capri pants or back.
Kim :Betsy, I was just about to use that because I saw that yesterday and so this I've always had an issue with capri pants because I hate the way they look on me, but I was wearing them because everybody was wearing capri pants. You can look at your website and see how individualized your services can be for someone and I know that's when you get really deep and, just like you said, get to know the person and really focus on what they're needing and what they're wanting and design their style. But you can go to your Instagram account and that can change your whole entire wardrobe. Right there, your reels and your posts are so informative Just five things you should have in your closet for the summer.
Kim :Or how to dress for a networking event. Or I love the one about we have the Nordstrom sales and the Amazon Prime, and how to shift your mindset when all that's coming at you and really not get overwhelmed by that. But your information is so specific that everybody can benefit from. So whenever you were talking about that, about the capris, I was like I learned so much just from your Instagram account. That is for everybody.
Betsy :I would say I think it was one of those things where it's like, how do you? A lot of individuals who weren't even in like the fashion industry would ask me what sets you apart? What is it that sets you apart? And the one thing I always want to be and if this, if BBM and stylist stops becoming this, I won't want to do it anymore is I just want to be authentic, because we live in a world very similar to look at how cute these capris are. They're so cute and they are.
Betsy :I have seen some ladies make capri pants look chic, beautiful, an oversized blazer, stunning and beautiful. But at the end of the day, if it's not authentic to you or it doesn't relate to your everyday life, then it's not sustainable. And we're living in a world, especially in the influencer world, and I want him to influence the world. I'll go social media In our world of social media, especially for women. We are living in this world of unrealistic expectations from individuals who are not being their authentic self and it's not a knock on them. I admire people who have made good money in that influencer world. It's not a knock on them at all. It's just.
Betsy :I knew I wanted to be authentic Right now. If you ask me for what I'm wearing, I will send it to you, and this could be Betsy. You're not doing a good. It's not a good business model, and that's okay too, but what I won't do is have my feed be filled with here. Try this, wear this. You wear this. You should purchase this. This is on sale at Amazon, because number one that's not me, and number two I'm very different than other people. Honestly, if you wanted my insights, I'm going to send you a bunch of weird pattern dresses with dogs on it, because I'm quirky and I like quirky stuff, and I think that will always be.
Betsy :My goal is. I just want to be authentic. I just want to be real to this world. Today, I have on a really fun outfit that makes me feel so good. Can I be honest with you? Tomorrow's Friday, and I work from home on Fridays I will look like a bridge troll. I will wear one of my husband's t-shirts and I will wear sweatpants, because I turned the air down to 69, even though I'm not supposed to and I want it to feel like winter, and so that day I'm not going to look like a personal stylist who has her life together, because I won't have my makeup on because I don't want to, but it's authentic to me and it's authentic to the world that we live in that you cannot be on spot all the time.
Betsy :You just can't. So if I can be authentic and still give insights and tips and helpful things, that I've done my job, I think I've done what I wanted to do. Obviously, my goal would be like hey, book me for your services so you don't make the mistake of rocking capri pants when you don't really like them. You just thought you liked them and you don't. I have two very influential girls who I fought hard for.
Betsy :I suffered two miscarriages. The first one was before my firstborn. The second one was before my secondborn and I knew what that loss meant and what that pain meant, and obviously, as a mother, I never want my girls to experience loss and pain, but what I want my girls to experience is just like independence and self-love. I'm constantly surrounded by women who do not love themselves and I hate that. I hate that it's a culture that we live in. I hate. We live in a world where we're all keeping up with the Joneses but we're also mean to each other and it's a competition.
Betsy :I don't want that at all. What I want my girls to know is they love each other, they love themselves and they love others. And, however, I can do that authentically. And again, that's a big stretch to hey, you're a personal stylist, why don't you calm down, betsy? But that, that is my goal, that is what I want. I want the girls to see that and I want the girls to be equipped with the tools and the resilience and the information to be women who love themselves and are here to build other women up and love other women and not tear them down. Right.
Mary:I think, the end of the day, you would be hard pressed to find any woman who would really say oh, absolutely not, I don't need a personal stylist, I've got it all figured out. My wardrobe is just where I want it to be. There's no way right. We all know that every single person could benefit from having a personal stylist. My question to you is how do you turn that into clients? So you are surrounded with women, as you just said, who perhaps do not love themselves, who are feeling like a failure, who are feeling like they want to present themselves differently. How do you get those women to A even know about your services and B transition to being clients? I know that you talked about leads earlier, sending out leads.
Betsy :Tell us a little bit about that process, but I was someone who was providing helpful advice, and again, when I think about advice, I just think about something really like simple as what's a capsule wardrobe? So many people don't really know what that is right. And so when I started this, I thought, let me try and build organically an Instagram that was authentic but was filled with tips that could really start to ask the question in your brain maybe I need her. Right, that's my. The first thing is I have I'm the. If you're starting your business in general, the biggest thing you need to know is what is your ideal client? Who is it Not like she's blonde and she lives here? No, how old she is, how much money does she make? And I'm saying she, but how old they are, how much money they make and what's their key problem. And so when I figured that out and I'm so thankful for my marketing and my marketing background I could do all of that, but once I knew that, then it was like okay, so there's, these are their six issues. Let's say it's that I think I have a list of 10 problems, and so I would. Then I built out my content and I still build out my content on how to solve for those 10 problems that they have, because, at the end of the day, when you need something, you're going to. I need a personal stylist in Fort Worth, so you're not. Really. I want to feel good about my body Like no one's typing that into Google, right?
Betsy :They're typing in what they think is a personal style or a great resource would be Tanglewood Moms, where it's I'm struggling. I need help finding clothes. I don't know where to shop anymore. What are the cool kids wearing? Where are the shops? Kind of things like that. So I did a little bit of market research around. What people are asking. What people's responses were was also something I really looked at. I wanted to know, not just like what stylists said, but what do people that they respect, their friends, their peers, what did they say? How did they respond? And then from there is where I started to then again build my content, create content that was addressing their key issue, right, and then just giving them like a couple little tidbits and one.
Betsy :We cannot really retain more than three tips a day. To be honest, like in anything, we're busy enough, but we can't retain that much information. So I try to stick with short three tips quick advice here, quick things here, but it's all things that are trying to answer their key problem or their key issue. And I think from there then I start reaching out. So I am trying to get better at it. I'm growing and learning and what my strengths and weaknesses are.
Betsy :I'm not a great salesman. I'm not overly pushy. If someone just says no, I say okay. Or if they ask me for something, I don't just give them my package. I actually just help them. So I need to work on that and I started in February, so I am getting better on that. And I started in February, so I am getting better at that. But I would say for me it's addressing the key need and doing a ton of market research, but addressing that key need. That is what's your problem. And then from there, just creating content around. And then from there, just creating content around. I have four pillars of how I help people and what I try and do weekly is provide content, whether it's Instagram or sharing something on a blog post or sharing it when I'm in a networking environment. But I try and use one of those pillars to connect to someone, and it's not always. Hey, girl, is your closet a mess? It's not it doesn't.
Betsy :It's not really like that. I'm more conversational if you guys can't tell. So it's really. Can we believe that? Crop like crop tops are here? Where's a full length shirt, like that's? I've used that at one point in time where I'm like, do you want to wish they had a full length shirt around here? Because I don't, I'm not gonna wear a crop top. I've had four pregnancies, essentially, and this isn't it. The middle is not my best feature and I need a long shirt, darn it. And it's little things like that. And, of course, if you can't tell, I use comedy a lot.
Betsy :I don't want this to be so serious all the time. I want it to be fun. I want you to enjoy it while we're there. So if, like, you're popping a bottle of champagne because you're really overwhelmed by the process, let's go. I'll have one with you If you need a coffee, if you need a break. That's happened before, but I just want it to be fun and I think I need to shift. To be honest with you, Mary, I need to grow. I need to maybe be more of a hustler. I don't know. I am working on those things. I know what my strengths are, I know what my weaknesses are, but I think, if I can keep making it fun and make it attainable, the best. I think the best word I can say is attainable.
Betsy :Because fashion feels so unattainable sometimes because what you're not thinking of is someone who is honestly working a 60 hour a week job. They don't give a S about. What they're not thinking of is someone who is honestly working a 60 hour a week job. They don't give a S about what they're wearing because they're exhausted. Or someone who has three kids and the only time they have for themselves is nap time from one to two. Right. So you already have too much on your plate. I don't want to make it more stressful for you. I want to make it relatable. I want to make it relatable, I want to make it authentic, I want to be real with you and I want to make it attainable. Because it is attainable, there is a way that you can find something that you like to wear that makes you feel good.
Mary:I think you've done a really good job sharing. I know that I asked a specific question about volume of clients, but, in the same breath, truly what you're sharing and what Kim and I experience as well with our businesses, is that so much of success of being an entrepreneur is not how many clients you have. It is not, at the end of the day, how many dollars did I contribute to the family this month. You're going to be chasing your tail for the rest of your life if that is your goal, because you can always add more clients.
Mary:But I think that this was a really great episode to show how you start a business right from the ground up, with the right mindset, with the right passion and, like you said, the pillars in place so that you don't get lost by the shiny things along the way that you might get distracted with, or by all of your Instagram feed. And we've all seen those influencers. Where they're, we're like, oh my gosh, they're. They started off recommending this, but now we're seeing their athleisure and then now they're giving recs on what's in their pantry. What is going on so that you've really been able to stick not only true to your brand, but just have your followers evolve with you to come along on the journey and, like you said, feel good along the way, which is just phenomenal.
Betsy :I think that to me not that I'm an expert at giving business advice at all what I've seen to be true in all the day I've seen so many things like. I've seen so many successful things I've seen a lot of failures as well. What I know to be true is, like at the beginning, if you don't spend time in the operation side of your business, you could get really successful and still fail. You could get really successful and still fail. There's a great girl on Instagram and she breaks down these multi-million dollar companies that, like she just broke down. I'm trying to think maybe a hey dude, she broke down, hey dudes, about how their first year in sales they sold something like a hundred million and then they got sold by Crocs and now their value since they went public is, like completely plummeted. You think those people thought when they were selling a hundred million dollars worth of the ugly shoes I've seen in my life, thought at that moment, we're not going to go down from here, we are going, we're here, we're yachts, let's go. And so I think for me, it's.
Betsy :I will always go back to my original business plan. It's. I have a one pager. It has my goals, though In 10 years, I may not be here or they may drastically change, but I'll always go back to them because that was what my goal was wanted to do. And then I will also make sure that, before I launch seven different things, I have a plan to help me make everything that I've launched good, because I could launch a bunch of crappy stuff and I could we call it lipstick on a pig. I could put lipstick on a pig. I really could, because I could sell whatever if I wanted to. But if it's not my end goal, if it's not bringing what I want out of the business, it's going to fail eventually.
Kim :It really is.
Betsy :People are going to see through it. We're seeing a swing with influencers right now. The Kardashians is a great example. We were all over Everyone's all over the Kardashians. They were celebrating them for their bodies because they weren't paper rail thin. Now guess what? They've swung the entire opposite direction. They're all paper thin, they're all losing weight like crazy and they're not as relevant anymore.
Betsy :Kylie Jenner she started three or four different businesses that failed. So there is a world where this may not work out. You need to ensure that you have those foundational pieces of why you started this business. Always check yourself, whether it's monthly or yearly, I don't care, but have an accountability partner and have someone say what was your original goal? Let's go back to that. Go back to what you want. What was your vision? What was your dream? What did you want to do when you started this? What did you want to do? And I think, if you can keep that sense of accountability, I, at least from what I've seen and what I see now at Be Beaman Stylist it is.
Betsy :It's my little coach. Like I ran, that was the only thing I was good at was cross country. I wasn't terrible at everything else, but I ran cross country and I was really good at it and I would remember my dad, who I love dearly. He would always be and he would study the course and then he'd be at these little places where he knew it would be really hard for me and when I was like I gotta give up, like I can't do this anymore, and my dad would just be there and he would be cheering me on and he'd be like you're got two people behind you, one person in front of you, they're 10 seconds away from you and that's your business plan, that's a partner, that's a friend.
Betsy :I'm using a great resource with Tarrant County Small Business Association. It's free. If you live in Tarrant County and you started a business, you can go there. But having that person and that foundational piece to help you along the way, as you're building the plane and flying it at the same time, you need those pieces and those people in place to help you. When I had a month, it was in June, I think I had a month in June where I sent out 25 leads of people who were like I'm interested, I want to know, and I got two out of it and I was so sad and I just remember being like does no one like me and somehow my algorithm got messed up and in that same month one of my videos only got like 100 views.
Kim :And I was like is my?
Betsy :mom, the only one watching this. Should I stop? And no, I had my encouraging people, but I had my business plan and it was right there and I knew that it wasn't always going to that. None of this is always promised and it's going to be okay, but I think having those things in place are key to make your feel successful and be successful.
Kim :You mentioned earlier when you were talking about what you're wanting to teach your girls and being authentic, and that you're just a personal stylist. You are so much more than that and I think anyone that just listens to five minutes of this episode would know that. I think your ability to relate to other people when they've hired you, you're giving them so much more than just personal style tips and you are funny and you are so easy to talk to and you're so encouraging and you're perfect for this job. You are doing so many great and wonderful things and I feel excited to have gotten to witness the beginning of it and how it's going to thrive and we just appreciate you sharing all that you've shared with us today.
Betsy :I mean it and I don't. We you know we have to wrap up soon. What you guys are doing is just powerful and I think, if anything, the most encouraging thing is being a part of a group of women like this and talking about stuff like this. Cause, yeah, did we talk about our business? Yeah, we did. And you guys, you guys talk about so much on your podcast, but you're also just talking. We're women who are busy, who have crazy lives, who are traumatized, who are stressed, who are happy, who are sad. We are so complex, but having a platform to talk about it, having a space to talk about it, and I think even just opening the door to hear the good, the bad and the ugly is just as powerful. So I love what you guys are doing. I'm so excited for this next season and I really am. I'm just. I'm thankful that you thought of me. I'm thankful for y'all listening to me ramble for so dang long. I'm not short. We know that it was awesome, crazy, but I appreciate you guys.
Mary:This is just. I cannot wait for this to launch. I know so many people are going to get a lot out of this and I'm honestly, I'm excited to listen back to this when we do our editing process.
Mary:I'm excited to just take in all the things that you said. I really want to just think about them more. You just had so much good advice to share with all of us and all of our listeners and anyone who is an aspiring entrepreneur, but also just anyone who really wants to hear from someone who is just doing it really well. So we appreciate you and thank you for being a guest on our podcast.
