How well do you know yourself? Introducing three of my favourite tools to help you shine

Welcome to the SELF.STYLED.LIFE Podcast with Janelle Wehsack

In today’s episode we talk about how well do you know yourself and three of my favourite tools to help you shine. 

Having an idea of how you’re wired and what your preferences are is fundamental to self-styling your life. You see, whilst we like to think we can control others through our words, actions and behaviours, the truth is the only thing we can control are ourselves. And the better we understand our own make-up and conditioning, the easier it is to make sense of and tailor our own responses, reactions, behaviours and patterns. It also helps  us to stop following the herd and inspires us to bring things into our lives that suit us and work well for us. These things can be everything from work opportunities to hobbies all the way through to how we spend our vacation time. And when things are working well for us, everything feels easier, more natural and way more fulfilling. 

So in this episode, I’m sharing three of my favourite tools to help you learn more about yourself.  We’ll explore: 

1. Discovering your unique Human Design
2. Using a Strengths finder
3. Learning about your Personality Type

Resources mentioned in the episode:

If you’re after a Human Design chart check out https://www.catskreiner.com/chart

Personality type - 16personalities.com

Strengths finder - https://www.viacharacter.org/Account/Register or https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/home.aspx

Find more from Janelle here:

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Book your discovery call: https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=16605569

Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/janelle.wehsack/

Download the Boundary Blueprint here.

Transcript

Transcript – SELF.STYLED.LIFE Podcast with Janelle Wehsack

Episode 19 - How well do you know yourself? Introducing three of my favourite tools to help you to shine

Hello hello fabulous human and welcome to the Self.Styled.Life podcast with me Janelle Wehsack. I hope that things are awesome in your world this week. I also hope you’re staying warm. As I’m recording this, the Australian east coast has been thrown straight into the depths of winter with an absolute arctic blast and I feel like I’ve been wandering around wrapped in a blanket for a week and a half. Which explains why I’m also excited to share that Scotty and I have finally decided that the time is right to travel again. Yes, we’ve booked a trip to France - it’ll be our first in 3 years by the time we get there and I know that the freezing weather was one factor in us choosing to travel to the French Riviera where we’re hoping for a big dose of warmth that only the south of France can offer.

France and warmth are two things that I know I need in my life. But for a long time, I had no idea what I wanted or needed in my life. It’s taken me a long time to sort all of that out. So today I want to fast track things for you by introducing you to three of my favourite tools to help you learn more about you. Understanding yourself, how you’re wired and your preferences is key to placing yourself in situations and environments where you can shine. 

But before I get into that, I want to introduce you to self-styled Sundays. I know that Sundays can be a write-off for many of my corporate friends. You want to be spending fun time with the family, doing something creative, getting prepped for the week ahead, or just relaxing. But instead, you’re already feeling anxious about how and when you’re going to do ALL of the things in the coming week. Sometimes that’s related to your corporate workload. Other times you’re focussed on ‘life’ things. Either way the Sunday afternoon blues are a real thing.

I promise that you can manage work, family and your well-being. You can even squeeze in some fun. And my clients often find that any anxiety they’re feeling about their work lessens when they think about their life as a whole. But none of this comes without a smidge of intention and a dash of planning. Which is why I’ve created self-styled life Sundays. If you’re up for it, join me in giving five minutes every Sunday to self-styling the week ahead. I know you can find five minutes on a Sunday and I promise that the return on your time investment will be worth it.

So how does it work? Every Sunday I share an Instagram post outlining the ways I’m going to self-style my life in the week ahead. I don’t overcook it - I share five simple plans for the week, in the following areas: career, well-being, creativity, family and fun. And as long as I show up for all five, I'm guaranteed to get to the end of the week feeling both balance and accomplishment. 

I’d love it if you joined me in the practice. You might want to leave a comment on Insta about how you’re going to self-style your life in the coming week. But, if that doesn’t feel like fun for you, you could simply write how you’ll show up in your private journal. It’s definitely NOT the sharing that matters here - it’s all about the intention that you take into your week. I’ll share my Insta link in my bio and I really hope to see you there.

Ok with all of that shared, it’s time for me to get on with today’s episode. Getting to know yourself better. Now this isn’t a new idea. After all, the maxim ‘Know thyself’ was inscribed in the forecourt of the temple to Apollo at Delphi. Since ancient times, it’s been recognised that understanding ourselves and how we tick is an important part of life.

And in my mind, having an idea of how you’re wired and what your preferences are is fundamental to self-styling your life. You see, whilst we like to think we can control others through our words, actions and behaviours, the truth is the only thing we can control are ourselves. And the better we understand our own make-up and conditioning, the easier it is to make sense of and tailor our own responses, reactions, behaviours and patterns. It also helps  us to stop following the herd and inspires us to bring things into our lives that suit us and work well for us. These things can be everything from work opportunities to hobbies all the way through to how we spend our vacation time. And when things are working well for us, everything feels easier, more natural and way more fulfilling. 

Now my friends in corporate might find that this sort of exploration and understanding can feel a little icky. I’m sure there isn’t one of us who’s worked in corporate who hasn’t filled in a questionnaire and soon after seen their name plotted somewhere on a whiteboard or a piece of butcher’s paper. Over the years I’ve been categorised as a colour, an animal, a single letter and a group of letters depending on the facilitator's model of choice. All in the name of team building. I mean, if you know about your coworkers style and preferences, surely things will gel more easily? 

I say that last sentence in air quotes because my observation on this over the years is that this is not necessarily the case. You likely already fully understand your colleague’s style. And in the work context there’s a good chance that humans have answered in the way they’d like to be seen rather than how they actually are. So at the end of the day, these things come off as feeling forced, leading more than a few in corporate to question the value of these exercises. 

But if you feel like that might be you, I encourage you to suspend your judgement for a minute. This time you’re doing this for you. So that you can start  building activities, opportunities and styles into your days that suit you, that feel like you and leave you feeling fulfilled rather than frustrated. Only you need to see the results. And you’re the only one who has to do anything with those results. So you’re safe. And you’re also in control. So jump in and have a play with these tools and see where they lead you.

Ok, let’s dive into the first tool which is to 

Discover your unique Human Design

When I first learned about Human Design a few years ago. I initially dismissed it. Not because of its links to astrology, the I Ching, the Chakra system and the Kabbalah - in fact, the blend of different systems actually made sense in my mind. No, the thing that put me off was learning that the whole system had been apparently channelled to its originator, a Canadian known as Ra Uru Hu, back in the 80’s. That part of the story clashed with my childhood conditioning and subsequently I didn’t pay attention to Human Design for a number of years. 

But whether it is the circles I run in, where Human Design just kept coming up, or whether I was just supposed to learn more, my curiosity eventually got the better of me and I sent away for my human design chart. The whole premise of human design is that we have a unique set of keys that make us, well us. And when we live in alignment with our design, things are fun and easy and flow. And if you’re living out alignment with your unique design, while you won’t necessarily be unsuccessful, things are unlikely to feel as What I learned was fascinating - and so accurately me. From the snippet of information I shared - my date, time and place of birth - no more than the info you’d share for an astrology reading - I got served information that described how I’d felt for as long as I could imagine. The accuracy was enough to encourage me to book a reading with an American Human Design practitioner. If I’d thought that reading about my design gave me insights, then I was in for next level when I had someone tell me about my design. Since that day, which was at the end of 2020, I’ve gradually been practicing how to live by my design. When I say live, I mean to make decisions and choices aligned to my design, work with my energy levels and not be sucked into doing things that work for other people. Learning my personal design has helped me trust myself and especially my gut and my intuition. More and more I’m able to turn inward for the answers and I feel like I’m less likely to look for silver bullet answers or for someone else to tell me how things should be done. 

If you’re interested in learning about your unique design via a free chart, there are a number of sources out there. We’ll pop a couple of links in the show notes if you’d like to check them out and choose one that suits you.

Tool number two - Use a Strengths finder

I remember when I went to a coaches training one day and the lead facilitator, who had trained in Positive Psychology with Martin Seligman, started talking about the fact that we should be focussing on building on and leveraging our strengths rather than trying to fix - I’m using air quotes there - our weaknesses. This was a complete revelation for me. Right up until that point I’d been encouraged as a human and as a leader that it was my job to uplift gaps, problems and weak spots, both my own and my team members. The thing is, as human design teaches us, we’re all unique. We’re not all supposed to be good at everything but no one tells us that. And so we end up feeling frustrated at best and inadequate or incompetent at worst.

Two reputable tools for helping you find out where your strengths naturally lie come from Gallup and a group called Via. Both offer free and paid versions of their strength finders. I find the free versions of both enough to get you started in this space. I’ll put links to both in the show notes.

The next trick is to start really incorporating your strengths into your day-to-day life. Once you have your lists of strengths, try to use them regularly in your work and your life in general. Because you are prioritising using the skills and traits that come naturally to you, you’ll likely  find that things again will feel easier, and you’ll be able to build your confidence and your self-belief quickly as you play in your sweet spot. How cool is that?

Tool number three - learn about your Personality Type

Regardless of whether you work in corporate or not, it’s likely you’ve heard of Myers Briggs personality testing. You might have been asked which combo of the four letters you are. I’m an INFJ but you might be an ESFP or an ENTP. In fact you could be any one of 16 different personality types. While it sounds complicated (and has the ability to cause some eye rolling in corporate circles) all the Personality Types really tell us are our preferences or styles when it comes to the ways we interact with the world. The first letter tells us whether we lean towards Extraversion or Introversion. The second letter indicates whether we prefer to use our senses or our intuition. The third gives us insight into whether we prefer to think or feel our way through life. And the final letter tells us whether we tend towards using judgements or perceptions. 

Like the earlier tools I’ve talked through today, understanding your personality type can help to set you up for success by allowing you to make the most of your natural preferences rather than trying to force yourself to do things that make you feel like a square peg in a round hole. Knowing that I need time alone, that I go best when I follow my intuition, that feelings are important to me, but that I need structure when making decisions has been game changing for me.

If you’re new to personality types or if you’d like to revisit your personality type as part of understanding your own preferences better, I recommend the free site called 16 personalities, which is the numbers 1 and 6 followed by personalities.com. And again, if you’re listening along right now and can’t take notes or type in a browser, I’ll include a link in the show notes. 

Ok, so there you have it. 3 tools to help you get to know yourself better so you can shine at work and in life.

Just a reminder on the tools again - the first was understanding your unique human design, the second was leveraging your strengths and the third was having a fresh look at your personality type. I know that showing up authentically is an overused term but knowing yourself by using these tools will really help you to show up like the real you  and that’s when you will really shine.

I really hope that you found today’s episode a combination of interesting, informative and inspiring. I’ll be back soon with another episode of the Self.Styled.Life podcast. But until then, stay fabulous xx