Shahin's Corner - The Podcast That Bites
Shahin's Corner - The Podcast That Bites
Shahin's Corner with Special Guest Shawn Michael Crane - Transcending Adversity to Strength: The Power of Personal Growth, Discipline, and Community in Life's Journey
What if your biggest adversity became your greatest advantage? Join me as I sit down with the inspiring Shawn Michael Crane. From witnessing his parents' struggles with drugs and alcohol to enduring a life-altering period of incarceration, Shawn's journey exemplifies the transformative power of personal growth, discipline, and physical fitness. He shares his wisdom about how suffering can be a catalyst for growth and why we need to appreciate our privileges. Our conversation serves as a stark reminder of life's finality, and stresses on making the most of our time and opportunities.
In the second part of our discussion, Shawn and I delve into an essential journey we all must embark on – self-development. We dissect the role of personal development in expanding our mindset, exceeding our expectations, and battling negative self-talk. Shawn provides practical insights on aligning with our highest selves and maintaining confidence, even when the going gets tough. What's more, he shares his unique perspective on the preciousness of life, developed amidst the direst of circumstances.
Finally, we discuss the power of community in personal development and mental health. Shawn introduces his online program that offers a platform for men to share experiences and support each other's growth. This enlightening conversation leaves us with the necessary tools to live to our fullest potential, inspiring us to break out of our comfort zones and strive for more. If you’re searching for motivation and guidance on your own personal development journey, this episode is a must-listen. Join us in this powerful exploration of life, growth, and the strength that lies within adversity.
with Warner. I'm really excited with the guest that we have today. He's just a bad ass man, and he was messing up the internet with his biceps just earlier, about five minutes ago. So but before we get started, I want to. I want to show you this video.
Speaker 2:You my name is Shawn Michael Crane and I spent over 2000 days in prison changing my life. Now, through that experience, I was able to form an unstoppable mindset that has allowed me to literally create my dream life. That's coming home, and I want to teach you exactly what I have done. Don't be one of those people that say you're going to do something and then you go back to your old ways.
Speaker 1:Shawn Michael Crane. How are you, buddy? I'm doing awesome, man. How you doing, I'm doing great. Hey, man, I appreciate your time today. I knew you're a busy guy. I first saw you a few months back on Ken Jocelyn's stage speaking in front of a couple hundred people and it just your content was pretty powerful, man. I mean to be honest, when you first came on I'm like great, you know another big, muscular guy on stage and then you started talking, man, and you connected with me with your content. I want to get into that a little bit, but before we kind of get there, let's just talk a little bit about you before prison and kind of what your lifestyle was like and what got you stuck into some trouble.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, first of all, it's one of you said that about. You know, when I walk on stage you're like great, another muscular guy. You know, sometimes people think that someone who's physically fit they're going to be maybe like full of themselves or just want to talk about how great their aesthetics look. And like I teach guys all the time that you're physique and the way you care yourself is a sign, it's a signal to the world about how much you really care about yourself deep down inside. Like that's the way I look at it. When I walk into a room, I want people to remember me. Like he was well spoken, he had good confidence, good energy, he was physically fit. So it's funny you said that because I grabbed your attention for one reason, but then, hopefully, connected to you on a deeper level, and that's always my goal. You guys, like I want to connect you on a spiritual level, like I want you to feel emotion when I speak and when you hear my story.
Speaker 2:And this goes all the way back to all the hardships and challenges I went through in life. You know, growing up, like a lot of people, I had big dreams and these passions, like when you're a kid, the world is just a blank canvas and you feel like you can do and become anything you want and at some point we're introduced to reality. Some point we emerge from that dream like state that we're brought into this world, in, and then reality sets in and we're like holy shit, this is what it's like, this is life. No wonder all those adults are always so jaded and grumpy, right Like that's what happened to me.
Speaker 2:So growing up I'm from Santa Barbara, california, a beautiful beach community right near the ocean. I'd be at the beach all the time surfing, or I'd be playing sports. I played basketball, football, baseball Every day at school and after school me and my friends would be out in the streets playing sports. It was a beautiful life, man, and I just wanted to be a professional athlete and I wanted to pursue those dreams. And at that age at eight, nine, 10, I knew exactly who I was supposed to be in this life. But then I started noticing my parents struggling big time at home and I started seeing them fight and I started seeing them altered on drugs and alcohol and on a couple separate occasions I saw my mother overdose and the ambulance and paramedics show up and they're putting her on this stretcher and putting oxygen on her. It was terrifying man. So in that moment, that beautiful life that I thought I existed in completely disappeared. My world started to turn really dark and cold.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know there's so much. Actually. I'll tell you what. I have a presentation coming up in a couple days. I'm going to talk about being shredded on stage, right. It's something that a little background on me. I played pro sports in my 20s and I was out there, you know, seven days a week for almost 10 years, religiously. I mean 4am runs, three a day training sessions. It was crazy, right. So about six months ago, maybe about a year ago, I still stayed fit, you know. I was probably working out, you know, at the gym three times a week, running, you know, and then some weights and then trying to play, you know, game every week and then some tournaments. I just made a commitment, though. My commitment was I got to do something every single day right In the extracurricular activities as far as being in the gym. So I tell you, it's funny you say about discipline and being fit. I think that's a huge starting point in trying to get that mindset right. You know there's so much.
Speaker 1:There's so much I want to talk to you about, because you really connected with me on stage, because you know it's one thing and here's the challenge we tell ourselves all day, every day, probably multiple times a day I got it, this, I got it that. You tell people, your loved ones, your friends, I'm going to start this, I'm going to start that. But then when it gets hard, man, you just don't do it. And I think the first part in that direction can be simply just getting off your ass and go into the gym and it can be a half hour start for you, a one hour start. So what I've done is I'm trying to actually talk to my wife about it yesterday. I'm like listen, one hour a day. I can get in the gym One hour a day. Whether I'm doing cardio, whether I'm lifting weights, whatever, it is one hour a day.
Speaker 1:So I have over the past, you know, almost year, maybe nine months or so, and I can tell you that I'm not 100% at it, but I try to get in five, six days a week, and then I try to play once a week as well. So I'm doing something active every single day. I told my wife yesterday that I've been married over 10 years now and it's probably the strongest I've been. As far as being in the gym, I've cut back a little bit on my cardio, but I got to bring that up too. But I tell you, man, if you were on stage and you were fat and kind of, you know, went out there, that immediately would have probably turned me off. I think what happened is when you went on stage and you were shredded, I was like, you know, cool, at least he's fit, he's on stage, let's see what he's got to talk about. So it kind of gave me that you know you talk about in your content about judgment, right, yeah, it was in the first five seconds.
Speaker 2:Yeah, people act like that's such a bad thing. You've got to understand the way our brains operate. It's survival, you know hundreds of thousands years ago. We're always scanning our environment to see where the threats are. Are there predators? Like? That's the way our brain is wired. So people still use that aspect of their brain now and we judge people instantaneously If you pull up in a Lamborghini, versus like an old beat up truck, like instantaneously you're going to be judged If you get on stage and you're fat, now to shape.
Speaker 2:To me that says that shows a lot. It shows a lack of self worth, a lack of discipline, a lack of commitment and follow through versus the guy that shows up on stage in good shape. I know what it took to build that physique. I know the internal battle he had to win day by day. I know the discipline of his food and just pulling his ass up out of bed and getting to the gym. So immediately you're going to give that person more respect. Now we're not saying that people who aren't in shape are bad people. I'm just saying, when it comes to peak performance, if you want to find true enlightenment, if you want to be the best husband, the best father, like you have to understand that that baseline of discipline and commitment it's everything, because everything, like you said, builds upon that.
Speaker 2:I didn't just get here magically because I said, hey, I want to be a speaker, I want to, like, do this. Like I had to earn every step of the way. I had to fight through so many internal battles, like when that alarm goes off in the morning. That's when you find out what you're made of. I was tired this morning, did not want to get out of bed. It was dark. My son was cuddling with me. He's three, he's my little buddy. I had all the reasons in the world to stay in bed, but I knew if I didn't get up and I didn't go conquer that first internal battle, I would have had less positive thoughts, my energy would have been off. Then I'm showing up for this interview, I'm showing up for my wife and kids and everything I do for the rest of the day is compromised because I couldn't win that initial battle with self.
Speaker 2:And here's the thing man like I went through a lot of trauma growing up. I have demons that I still battle today. Like, once you vanquish your demons, I'm 12 years, sober now right, went through prison, got through life in prison, a life sentence, like, once you go through that stuff, it doesn't just disappear from your memory and your psyche and your internal Like. It's still inside of me, like those memories and experiences. But I found ways to combat them. Every single day. I don't put a needle in my arm, I don't need to drink, I don't need to escape. I can stay present and grow and continue to grow through all the stuff I'm facing and because I found healthier habits and ways to channel that energy. So, for me, exercise I'm obsessed with being my best. I'm obsessed with exercise, eating right, self optimization Like I'm obsessed with these things but they lead me to becoming a better person over time. So it's my way to still combat those demons inside of me and continue to show up and show people what's possible when you don't give up on yourself.
Speaker 1:You know, I have to say, if I was 35 years old I wouldn't have understood what you just said. I think at 55 now it just makes so much more sense because I'm so much more self aware of myself. There's a certain level of emotional intelligence you have to understand in what you said, Because the fact is most people don't do it. Most people wake up in the morning and go. I should go to the gym, but fuck it, you know. And the list goes on and on. I should. There's just a lot of I should, but then we take the easy door, we take the easy road, and so, you know, I want to talk a little bit about your experience in prison and what when your true aha moment was, because I genuinely believe that at some point you just have to kind of, I guess maybe you can gradually make a decision, but there's got to be a moment where you just say that's enough. You know, yeah, no, absolutely.
Speaker 2:And can I touch on what you just said before we get into that, because I think this is really important for viewers. You know Napoleon Hill, who's famous for writing thinking grow rich. He also wrote a very profound book, outweighing the devil. I'm not sure if you've read it, but he talks about how people, over time, make these small decisions day in and day out that weaken the results, like their willpower right, like smoking. He uses that as an example. Now we can use food or phones or all these small little actions throughout the day that reduce our willpower and discipline, and over time it affects every aspect of life because then we're less likely to be able to push ourselves in the gym, push ourselves in a tough season of business, push ourselves through a difficult couple of years in our marriage, whatever it is.
Speaker 2:But the guy who forges discipline and every little thing that he does and he's building up that mental willpower Right, that's the guy that you see being able to forge through anything in life. So I just want to point that out to the viewers. Like the sentiment or the statement the way you do anything is the way you do everything. That's what that means, like take pride in every little detail, like I'm talking about the way you walk, the way you tie your shoes, do you make your bed, you wash that dish in the sink. You look people in the eyes when they're talking Like if you do all the little things to the best of your ability, it starts to carry over in those bigger moments of life. So I just want to touch on that, Sean.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you, man, I you know, one of the things I talk about with doctors is I talk about you know how can we be better, how can we improve?
Speaker 1:How can we and doctors just have such a energy to go towards? As soon as we talk about how can we improve, they go towards clinical dentistry. They go towards wanting to learn another dental service, wanting to learn how to maximize that specific service that they've taken a deep dive into, which is great. There's nothing wrong with the quality of wanting to be the best dentist you can be. But, man, let me tell you the biggest part that we miss. The X factor is the self development side. The self development side is where you can truly be a leader. The self development side is everything we're talking about here in the first 15 minutes, is everything a leader has that can be on stage, that can be somebody different. Dude, on Thursday night I'm going to say to probably 25 DMD doctors in the room I'm going to say you know, in our profession I have tremendous amount of respect for our profession. I love our profession, but you know what? You can be a doctor, fat and lazy, and do 300,000 a year, or you could be shredded and do a million. That's your fucking choice, right, that's right, and so that's that's the thing,
Speaker 1:Right now, this moment where we're having this conversation. This is the difference between. You know, people always go change mindset. Ugh, you know, everybody just talks about the same shit all the time. But, dude, this is it right here. You know, just be the best at whatever you're doing. Be the best at what that is, take pride in whatever it is that you're doing. And you know what? The first thing is how you look. I tell you, man, doctors, dude, they're 50 pounds overweight. Their neck, shoulder, lower back, their core, all that stuff starts falling apart. They start getting on meds and I'm listening to Gary Brecker right now quite a bit and he's talking about all the bullshit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, dude, all the bullshit that the meds will do to you, I mean it's I'm taking a deep dive into self development. I need to continue to self develop. I know that. You know I think I'm pretty damn good dentist. Clinically I'm pretty sound. Or certain procedures I don't like doing Well, fuck it, I don't like doing it. But I think what I'm really intrigued by right now and this is why I have you as a guest and this is why I went to Ken's event is that I'm intrigued by people that dive deep into self development and and they're actually disciplined to do it.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, and let's let's. The reason people don't is because it's hard, like the way you feel is a byproduct of how you live. So if you have a bunch of money and you have a great profession as a dental surgeon or whatever you're doing, but you're in this shot out body and you're eating crappy food and you're taking pills and meds, that person seldom has true inner peace or enlightenment, like I experienced the most profound form of inner peace and enlightenment in a prison cell, facing life. And let's get into that Cause. This is where everything that I've learned and teach stems from.
Speaker 2:It was real life experience and I was locked in a cell at 23, facing life in prison for a crime I didn't even commit. So all the variables were there. You had that extreme experience of being incarcerated for something you didn't do. No one thinks that'll happen to them, that's something you see in movies, that'll never happen to you, and I right, no way. Well, it did. So you have that variable.
Speaker 2:Then the isolation 24 hour a day, locked down with nothing, no phone, no kids, no job. I'd have to worry about money, nothing. So I was able to, like, tap into this place in my mind and generate this awareness over time that I never would have had the opportunity to otherwise. And then sobriety. So I hadn't been sober for 10 years. I was numb. I was taking pills, smoking, drinking A lot of people are numb right now, they don't realize it but a couple of glasses of wine a week, a little vape pen here and there, a perc set. They don't look like addicts and they don't think they have a problem. So what happens is you sever that clarity and that connection to source when you're not completely sober. I don't care who you are, I'll debate this with anybody in the world If you're not a hundred percent sober, you'll never be able to reach your true potential in life. That's my belief.
Speaker 2:So those three variables and just being in that situation, thinking my life was over, it did something to me on the deepest level that is even hard to articulate with words. You know, I tell people all the time it's like I feel like I died and got a second chance at life. I feel like for the first 23 years of life I was seeing the whole world through black and white, right, maybe a little bit of color. When I was a kid I had that. But then something happened inside of me where now I could see the whole world in color. It was the most beautiful, resplendent, mesmerizing colors and images. This was what was happening to me on a spiritual level. It's the only way I could describe it.
Speaker 2:Because when everything's taken from you and you don't have family, you can't go outside when you want, you don't pick and choose what you eat, or any faster than life, suddenly, all the things that we take for granted or overlook or never even think about, you start to cherish those and understand how precious and valuable they truly are. So for me, that's when I started doing every little thing to the best of my ability because I had nothing. I would clean myself floor like it was a palace not any crumbs, not any dirt. I would take so much time to clean myself floor and I would just be in this zen, hypnotic trance, man. Nothing else in my life even existed in those months. It was just that endeavor. And then, when I would work out, I'd work out like it was all I had and I would just cherish my body and I would show how grateful I was to have the function of my arms and legs, how grateful I was to be alive through those workouts.
Speaker 1:And so every day, with Well, it looks like we lost Sean for a second. I'm sure he'll pop back in here. You know, the thing that he's talking about right now is so important because we have the luxury of living in America and I want to talk to him about this because this has happened right now and in many parts of the world. And you know, it's one of those things that let me just text them real quick, real life events right now, man, in a sense of what's happening in Gaza, what's happening in Ukraine, it's easy for us to be kind of on the outside, on the sidelines, given the play by play, but, and you know, it's interesting how social media has just kind of brought everything right in front of us. I mean, war has been going on for years, for centuries maybe, and it's never been brought to the TV screen like it is today.
Speaker 1:And it's so sad to see everything that's going on with innocent people all around the world, whether it's the Palestinians, whether it's the Jews. It's interesting, and I'm not a very religious person In fact I've probably become more religious more recently and that's a different discussion all in itself, as far as my own self development and the things that have happened in my life in the last year. But I can tell you, jews, muslims, christians, we're not far apart, man. We're not far apart. And in fact, as I'm taking a deeper dive into understanding these different facets of religion, it's amazing how peaceful all of our religions really are and it's unfortunate what's happening. But we have the luxury here in America, man, we have the luxury to take the easy road and get away with it. And getting away with it is really hey, sean, what's up? Man?
Speaker 2:Not my day with that.
Speaker 1:Hey, it's all good, I know it, shit happens, dude. But look, here's the thing you were talking about your experience and having a palace in your fucking prison, right? So, and I'm intrigued because when you were off, I was talking about the luxury of living in America and a little bit about what's going on in Gaza and Ukraine and people and what social media has done to bring things so much closer to home today than ever before. But I want to talk a little bit about the luxury of living in America, but I'm sure it wasn't luxurious living in a prison cell. So go ahead, man.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, I love America and I think we have so many opportunities. Like you know, I'm a felon who went to prison and who come home and rebuild my life Like we have these opportunities here. But the best thing that's ever happened to me is going through those struggles and suffering. Being incarcerated was by far the best thing that ever happened to me in my life, because I didn't realize how good I had it. Okay, and a lot of people in America don't. They take things for granted, they bitch, they complain and they don't even go after their goals and dreams. And then they're going to sit here and talk shit about other people or be upset with their life because they don't know what's at stake and they don't know what it would be like to have all this taken away. And so the best thing that happened for me is I had it all taken away and I was just, you know, thrown, thrown into this dungeon and to the cell where I had to figure it out.
Speaker 2:And the best thing was it forced me to look internal. You see, I think our whole life we're bought up to look externally at things. We're looking to our parents, we're looking to kids, at school teachers. Then we start wanting to accumulate things that we see other people having very seldom our people taught or prompted to look within. And so I had all the distractions stripped away, I had everything just taken from me and I started finding this voice within myself, this truth, this clarity. You know it was God. Whatever you believe, if you're, whatever your religious background is I don't affiliate with religion, but I know definitively that I believe in God and you know I'm a spiritual man and that's what started to happen to me in that cell is I just became so attuned and tapped in on such a deep level.
Speaker 2:And so the first thing I did because you brought up earlier about, like, making commitments right I knew in my heart that I had not lived up to my potential and I hated that feeling. I looked back on nothing but regret, nothing but procrastination, excuses, and I hated myself for that. So imagine me walking around in my life hating myself. No wonder I'm using drugs and alcohol and doing all these things. I don't even want to look myself in the mirror, let alone talk to other people and show them who I've become. I was embarrassed.
Speaker 2:So in that moment I said never again.
Speaker 2:Never again will I contribute to this feeling Like I don't care what happens to me.
Speaker 2:Other people can try to cause harm, I can go to prison, but I'm never going to be an adversary in my life. I'm going to be my greatest advocate from this moment forward, and I just made a promise that I was going to give my best effort to everything I did, and I was going to be my true self, like my best self, so that when I looked in the mirror even if it was one of those scratched up jail mirrors I could see a reflection of somebody I was proud of. That's all I wanted in that moment, and so I knew I had to be sober. So I made a commitment to stay sober for the rest of my life. I knew I wasn't going to glorify violence or be around the other guys in prison who were doing those things, and I just started making these commitments and committing my life to these hard truths that I knew would lead me to a life that I was proud of or become in a person I was proud of, and that's literally where my personal growth and my personal development started.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, why do we have to wait until everything is taken away from us before we have our aha moment? Right, I mean, this is the challenge, because the reality is, because we live in a pretty luxurious country. Right, I mean we can argue, but you know, obviously, well, we have a bias. We live in America but we believe it's the best country in the world. Why not just be the best you can be without having everything taken away from you? Why not not have your lowest moment in your life? I mean, I asked myself this question too. I mean, you know, I left my parents home at 18. And like I didn't even I mean it just it's. It's kind of maybe a little comical at 18 today to realize to not know the birds and the bees and like I didn't understand a lot of things.
Speaker 1:When I was growing up at home, I lived a very simple life because my parents lived a very simple life. They didn't drink, they didn't smoke. They've been married over 50 years now. We immigrated to this country in 1978. I was 10 years old at the time and that was because of the uprising and the issues that were going on in Iran at the time. And I've lived here. I mean it's funny because I've lived here 45 years. I've lived here longer than Americans that have been born in the States, right, many of them that I talked to on a daily basis. But the point is is, you know, from 18 to to probably about 35, you know, and I don't smoke, I don't drink, but you know, my life turned and so now that I look back in my early 50s, I'm like wow, like where did?
Speaker 1:I do all the time that I wasted, you know, with. I mean, look, you play pro sports, but you're after three, four hours a day on when you're in regular season. You got nothing going on, you're just sitting around right and all of that time wasted. And it continues on and on with all the time I've wasted from, let's say, you know, 18 or 25 to 50. And and now you know, obviously today as well, I still feel like I waste time. But why? How do we maximize? This is the question. First, and this is important to understand, first, we have to realize that we always take the easy road, and the easy road has to stop. That takes self discipline. But when? When do we try to maximize our time? I mean, even today, I'm trying to maximize my time. So now, in your case, let's say, you hit your moment that you're like I'm going to be my best self. How are you maximizing your every day now?
Speaker 2:So now, in my current life, right now, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2:So I mean I spent the last 12 years on this journey. I think initially for a lot of people it's trying to get clarity around what they feel as a purpose in life. You know people always ask like well, what if? If you want to maximize your time, don't you want to know where you're going and why you're going there? Like, otherwise it just you won't be as committed, you won't be as dedicated. So I had so much time to work on myself and think about what I wanted to do in life that I have that answer. I know what I feel my heart. I'm born to do, and that's be of service and help people Right.
Speaker 1:Well, let me say this, Sean, if you don't mind, because I think this is what's important here, as well as the self-awareness component of maturing as you age, right. I mean, like you realize your moment when you got into prison and you realize that now I got to change my life, I got a second chance. Most people don't realize that they only have one life to live.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that's a good yeah, that's a good place to start, honestly. So, because a second ago you're like why do people waste so much time? Why do we do this? Why do we do that? Simply put, they don't know what's at stake and most people don't actually think they're going to die Like nobody's ever died and had that experience to shift their perspective. So you know it's our perspective and you're brought up in this world. You don't ever think it's going to go away Like we see people die. We know it's a thing, but no one's ever experienced.
Speaker 2:And there's something about real life experience that can instantaneously shift your perspective and change the way you think and feel. That's what happened to me. That's one of the things that I strive to help people to understand consistently in my content or coaching clients. I help them to understand that this time is precious. It's temporary and you're either going to get to the end if you make it that far and have a lot of regrets that you look back on, or you're going to look back and have pride and gratitude for taking action to create a life that you truly wanted and so understanding what's at stake.
Speaker 2:If you don't become that person, you're being called to become, like 95% of the men that reach out to me for coaching, don't feel like they're all in in their life, and that's where the problem stems from.
Speaker 2:They're not eating right, their bodies reflect not working out, not eating right, they're not as happy, they can't be the way they want around their family, like just all of these symptoms, because they're not just attacking their life, they're not utilizing their time, they're wasting it, and it's because they don't know what they really want and where they're going and they don't have a plan, day by day, that's going to build momentum and align them to that person.
Speaker 2:So that's it right there, though, in a nutshell, man, I don't think people fully understand what's at stake, and that's why you see individuals who have come to this country from other countries like yourself, people like myself who have gone to prison, or individuals who maybe overcame leukemia or cancer, went through some horrific car accident, had to rebuild their life. You see a depth in those individuals, right, and you can call it wisdom. Some people it happens over time, with age, or some people younger who have gone through really traumatic life experiences, but it changes their perspective and the way they look at this world, like they're seeing the same things as other people, but they think about them differently. And so that's it, right there, people just waste time because they don't think they're actually going to die man, they think they're going to live forever.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know I'm going to talk about this as well, because doctors always complain about I got no time. I got no time and it's just that we're, as a profession, we're just so inefficient. And it's interesting because if you really sit down and break down your time, you got a lot of time. You just don't know how to manage your time, and I think that's really important. But let's go, let's talk about what your goal is now when you get on stage. Right, so you got an hour of time. What are you trying to accomplish when you get on stage?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So obviously I want people to feel something like. I want them to experience emotion, I want them to cry, I want them to get fired up and inspired, I want them to use that experience as a mirror, to look back on themselves and ask themselves this question like am I all in and is the way I'm living going to lead to true fulfillment in the best life possible? Because I think it's so easy for people to get lulled into this false sense of comfort, like that's why people don't change. They're comfortable. But when the pain threshold is met right, when something bad happens, like you said, suddenly we want to change that. So we'll do anything to get out of that feeling of pain or sadness or whatever the emotion is right.
Speaker 2:Some people are extremely motivated by what's to gain right, so like money, success, a better body, a better relationship, like some people are very driven by that aspect, that particular side of the spectrum.
Speaker 2:But most people are motivated to avoid pain, to remedy pain. So I think that's why a lot of people don't change, because our world is so comfortable and easy. And so my thing with anyone that I work with is I want to push them and test them, I want to get them out of that comfort zone, because that's where we're forced to adapt, that's where we grow and that's where we feel all those positive effects like true fulfillment, gratitude and how you're living and who you're becoming Like. Some of the best feelings I've ever had in the world are after overcoming very difficult challenges in my life. You know so, when I'm on stage, I want people to really reflect and be honest with themselves, but I want to strike a nerve in such a way where they're either inspired to be their best self because they see and understand who they can become, or they start to feel what's truly at stake for them and it's usually pain and emotion, and that can be a catalyst for change as well.
Speaker 1:You know we can push ourselves like again, going back to dentistry, we can push ourselves. And you know, before I started dental school I'm like how in the hell am I going to take seven exams in four days, right? And so you push yourself and you get through it. And you know, when it comes to self development, if you really are honest with yourself and not lazy, but if you're really committed to self development, as you go through the process you learn things about yourself that you didn't believe was possible within you. The only way you know that is if you challenge yourself to actually push through what you promise yourself you're going to do.
Speaker 1:You know, I'll tell you, the last six months I've been pretty consistent and it allowed me the opportunity to tell my wife that this is the strongest I've been in the 10 years we've been married. I felt pretty good about that. I go in the gym. I'm like shit, man, I could lift this much. I didn't. I couldn't lift this weight just six months ago. I couldn't lift this weight five years ago. Not a I'm not saying like I'm a muscular bodybuilder type guy, but I know like I know my body pretty well, being an athlete in my life, and it's a good feeling, right. And so now it's more of an addiction to get more of that for myself, to challenge myself, to push myself.
Speaker 1:But six months ago when I started I wouldn't. I wasn't thinking. You know, there's going to be a day that I'm going to be feeling really strong and the strongest I've been in. I wasn't thinking that at all. I'm like shit, man, let me just get in the gym a little bit more. You know, and it's things like that that, you know, you kind of clap for yourself, you kind of cheer yourself on.
Speaker 1:You start getting this internal. You know, pom-pom, rah-rah-rah within yourself to go, fuck, yeah, man, I'm getting back in there, cause that that's a good feeling to have internally, to be able to talk to myself to say, hey, man is the strongest I've ever been. These little doors open for you as you continue to be committed to developing. I got work to do, man. Like I fall, I like shit. You know I don't eat very well. I don't eat like shit, but I don't eat very well. I can definitely improve my nutritional habits, right. So there's certain aspects there that I need to improve on. But I'm telling you, man, when you start getting into challenging yourself, you almost become your biggest fan and you just continue to push yourself internally and you don't beat yourself up. You're talking about voices and you control the voices in your head. I want to talk about that a little bit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, you have to be your I say your biggest advocate. You said like cheer yourself on. You have to be. You can't rely on other people's motivation, like a lot of people look to others to motivate them or like, oh you know, my wife's going to hold me accountable. Guys are telling me, or the guys at the gym, I'll go meet them or they'll get a trainer, but what if those people aren't there? Or what if they're having a bad day? You have to create that within yourself, right, dude?
Speaker 1:those voices, though it's like when we talk to ourself. Most people I mean look, I just was listening to Gary Brecca a few times this week and you know 60, I think there's 44% of America on anti-depressants, over 50%, or you know, got hypertension. I mean our society's kind of fucked up with all the pharmacological medications that are out there, and you know those guys won't argue because they're making the billions. But the point is is that we don't have confidence in ourself. Our voices are like now you're not good enough, you're not good looking enough. Nobody's going to listen to you.
Speaker 1:Who cares about what you got to say? You got no value, you're full of shit. You can't do that. Are you crazy Like you're going to go learn? No, man, get off that thing. No, you get off your high horse. Stop dreaming, stop. You got to get into the real world. The real world is you can't. These are the voices that go through our head and, before you know it, we're just beating ourselves up every single day to the point where it's like you lose the confidence, you're worried about judgment and I'm telling you, man, the fight is in your head 100%.
Speaker 2:Can you hear me? You kind of cut up. Oh, there you go. Yeah, I can hear you.
Speaker 2:It makes me sad to see people go through life with such negative internal dialogue, like you're talking badly about yourself, when all you have to do is start taking actions daily that make you feel proud of who you are. Let's trace it back to what we said earlier discipline and willpower. This is why those are so important to develop early on, because if you're consistently eating bad food like you used that example a second ago or you're missing out on the gym or you're like you're not doing these things that you said you were going to do, it's impossible for you to have consistent, positive self-talk and feel good about yourself if your actions don't align to who you want to be. So this is what I would challenge anybody listening to do I want you to get a piece of paper and write down every detail about the life that you would want to be living in five years. If you knew that somebody God, a magic genie, whatever you believe in would grant you those wishes, like anything that you write down on this paper is going to come true about your physique and how you look and feel, like what you're doing for work, your career, how much money you're making, what are your relationships like? Where do you live? How many homes do you own? Whatever you want you can write down, but write down the truth. Don't write down these outlandish things that you wouldn't even value and appreciate. What life would you actually love to be living Like? You'd wake up every day and you would just be so in love with your life? Can you imagine what that would look like?
Speaker 2:The first step is to actually write that down, because you have to create alignment to that person. Now that might be five, 10, or 20 years down the road, but this is what I did. This was 12 years ago that I did that exact same exercise and I made a commitment that I was just going to work every day on moving towards those things. I didn't have this timeline where I had to complete it in five years. I didn't have expectations. I just said every day I'm going to work towards that life because that's the life that would make me proud to live and I would be in love with. I know what this other life was like. I was miserable, I hated myself. I never want to feel that way again.
Speaker 2:And then it takes work, and it takes sacrifice and commitment and it takes faith. Most people don't have confidence in themselves and they lack faith that if they just work hard and do the right thing day by day by day, somehow some way things are going to get better. That's all. I have Faith that if I did the right thing day in and day out, I was going to end up in a place in my life that I was happy to be at.
Speaker 2:And people with faith will continue to fight and move forward. They won't quit and give up. But when you lose hope and you lose faith, you give up on the journey and you give up on yourself. And that's what people are doing, man, all day, every day, they're doing these things. They regret they're not following through with their promises and what they're saying is like I don't believe in myself, I don't have faith that I can create a good life, I'm not good enough, and, of course, those negative thoughts are compounded over time.
Speaker 2:So here's the last thing I'll say about this subject the best way for really anybody, but especially a man, a young man, middle-aged man if you want to change that internal dialogue, working out first thing in the morning is going to be the best way to offset those thoughts.
Speaker 2:It changes your physiology, right. It's going to change those thoughts in your mind and it's going to change the way you feel, your energy and how you operate. Going into the day, like, we have to make it very simple and straightforward for people to execute and you said this earlier like, as you continue to work on yourself over time and you develop yourself, both physically, mentally reading more books, listening to podcasts and journaling right, talking to smart people, having good conversation, working on your body, the craziest thing starts to happen. But your perspective changes, new ideas change, your belief grows and really the way you view the world and think about yourself starts to change. So the person who hasn't begun that journey it's hard for them to really understand what it's going to be like in five years if they were just consistent from this moment forward. But their whole life can change because of the way they're thinking and how they're feeling will evolve over time the more action they're taking.
Speaker 1:Well, let me ask you a question because I think this is an important point as well. How long have you been on stage like presenting, talking? You know your books gone out and all that stuff. How long has that been in your life?
Speaker 2:I mean really just this past year. So I had one speaking engagement a couple of years ago and then this year I spoke about 10 times and this was a vision and a goal of mine and it took time for me to build myself up, to be valuable to people, valuable enough to speak on stage, to build the right relationships with people who could put me on stage and to make that happen. But this year, yeah, this year has been a great year.
Speaker 1:So this is the point. The point is, your process started 12 years ago. 12 years ago and this is one of the things that people have to understand is, when you start, it's dark, nobody knows, nobody understands. It's very much an internal dialogue that you have to build within yourself to accomplish something. To accomplish something. Look, 12 years ago. Did you think I'm going to go through this process because, 12 years later, I'm going to get on stage, I'm going to write a book? No, right, no. And here's the thing.
Speaker 2:12 years passes one way or another. So for somebody listening who's like, oh my gosh, I couldn't wait that long In 10 or 12 years hopefully you're still alive Now do you want your life to be the exact same as it is right now, or maybe even worse? Or do you think if you dedicate yourself to a path that leads towards some goals you have, you might be looking back in 10 years going thank God I took action, like I get up every day, man, and the things I'm able to do now. I'm so grateful that I made the choices I did 10 years ago and I did the work Right. And you said something really important a second ago the work in the dark allows you to shine in the light. So all that work right 10 years ago is now allowing me to become valuable to people and get results now because of all those thousands of hours that have compounded over time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's the point. The point is, as you're talking to middle-aged men, you know, in their 30s and 40s maybe, and they're listening to you, I think the key message here also is is this is not overnight success.
Speaker 1:This is a process. It takes time. That discipline is something that you have to build within you to become that iron rod that allows you to continue to progress in advance. One of the challenges a lot of times, I believe internally, is that you do something for three to six months and then you just give up on it because it gets harder and harder. It's more difficult, more difficult. So that's one of the points here is that as much as we talk about self-development, it's an ongoing long game of life. It's not a you're not going to hit a finish line. The finish line is death.
Speaker 1:However, what you can do is you can start. You can start maybe as simple as getting in the gym for 30 minutes every single day, as simple, although it's so difficult. Right, but there's certain things you can do in your life. There's certain vices that you might have. Maybe it's alcohol, maybe it's drugs, maybe it's pornography, maybe it's, you know, whatever it is. Maybe it's coffee, maybe it's candy. I mean, you know, put the donut down, stop drinking beer, you know, after nine o'clock at night, and pizza, I mean, whatever it is that you got. To stop those vices. Start with the process and it's always these little things that you change, that become big things and magnify and multiply over time. So I mean I'm working on certain things and I still got other things I need to work on too.
Speaker 1:And the only person you know as an athlete you can the coach tells you to run to that cone and run back. Right, but the reality is many people don't run to the cone. They cut short because they want to finish first, right In the group of 10 or 12 guys that are running, or 20 guys. You don't want to be last, but you know everybody's cutting the cone, so you want to cut the cone too. So you end up, you know, being in line with everybody else. Crossing the lines of the coach goes yeah, he's hustling. It's the point of that difference of you running to the cone and back and pushing yourself to get to that cone. I think that's the key here and that's the differentiator is that you know there's going to be certain aspects that if you try to cut corners and you try to go short, you're not going to magnify your life, and those are things that I have to work on too. There's certain things that I cut corners on that? I shouldn't be, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, I got to continue to work on.
Speaker 2:Here's the thing too, man. I felt so dead inside for so long. You know, I was so miserable See, my parents just killed themselves with drugs and alcohol, losing both my parents at a young age. My dad went to prison. I was 14. My mom abandoned us to the streets. I was just in this living hell, man, and I hated my life, and I was so broken and I had no joy, no peace, no love.
Speaker 2:And when I got incarcerated, man, I looked back on all those years of life and something inside of me just told me that I had to fight, that this wasn't it, you know, I couldn't go out like that. That wasn't my life, that wasn't what I was here to do, you know. And so, from that moment forward, I just started fighting every day to rebuild myself. And what happened was I started to feel these emotions inside of me that I never experienced, like real love, real gratitude, real inner peace, like it was the best feeling in the world. And I couldn't believe that I was experiencing those emotions in a jail cell. It just rocked my world, man, and so my purpose, from that moment forward, just became to keep that energy alive. I was so scared that it was going to vanish or that I was going to go through prison and come home and go back to my old ways, and so I just wanted to keep that feeling alive inside of me. I loved the way I was feeling. I couldn't believe it. So every day I continued to take those daily actions that brought about that emotional state, every single day. I didn't matter if I was in this prison, that prison, if I had five years left, if I was still facing life, whatever it was. Every day I just wanted to feel that way.
Speaker 2:And so for the viewers and the listeners like, if you start to do that in your own life right now, I don't care if you have a bunch of money or no money, I don't care if you have a family or no family, I don't care if you have success or no success. If you're not creating that internal state within yourself, you won't be able to appreciate what you have. You won't feel it the same way. I've been there. I know what that's like.
Speaker 2:Number two you could have very little and have to rebuild your life. Let's say you're somebody like me that decides you want to quit drinking or tomorrow's day wanted to gym, and you're like, damn, I got a long journey ahead of me to lose this weight, whatever it is. Don't think about that. I promised you, in a very short period of time, the way you're going to start to feel about yourself because you're finally taking the right actions. It'll be one of the best experiences of your life. And then, every day, keeping that energy alive and cultivating that internal state, over time you'll start to see the results materializing your life.
Speaker 2:So I just want people to know that, man Like, the reason I will never stop until I die with this process of bettering myself is because of the way it makes me feel Like I would never just want to go and sit in front of the TV all day and eat a bunch of chips and drink beer and just waste that day away. It's too precious to me, man. I gave up a lot of time, I sacrificed a lot, I neglected myself for so long. I wasted too much time to do that again. So that's why I do what I do, man. It's like the way it makes me feel is priceless.
Speaker 1:You know, and this is the message for me, Like I talked to, I've been talking on stage since about 2017 and virtually in live, and I can tell you I've shifted in my message, and very recently as well is to say look, it's not about clinical dentistry, it's not about the business side of dentistry, it's about you. Right, it's about you. It's about the internal battles that you have within yourself to become internally happy. Some of the wealthiest doctors that I know not very happy internally. You won't see it. You know they're smiling, but the reality is there's some dark demons inside that they're fighting and it's well hidden.
Speaker 1:Money can hide a lot of things, but at the end of the day, man, you put your head on the pillow. So the point I'm trying to make is that that's what I'm intrigued by right now is yes, we need to have leadership skills. Yes, we need to have clinical skills. Yes, we need to be the best dentists we can be, but self development is a huge component of that formula, working to its maximum potential. If you maximize who you are, your career will maximize, and that's what I'm intrigued by right now is how do I get the best out of not only myself, but how can I get the best of the people that I'm communicating with?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, that's the personal development aspect of any career, any job. Being a parent, it's the number one factor that people need to lean on to improve the quality of their lives, or their results by far. Because when you elevate yourself in such a way where your thoughts are so positive, your energy is so good, your health, everything that you're doing is just optimized. You share the same information or say the same things, but people hear it differently. They feel it differently. So if you want to inspire your wife to work out more, you want to inspire your young kids to be healthier, to be good people in this world, you have to be that person first. So they look to you and they're like dang, I want to be like that.
Speaker 2:Or when you step on stage, or when you're sharing these to these other doctors, whatever it is that you're doing, you want them to look at you and be so impressed by who you are that they wanna know that information, they wanna apply. They're like, if he's doing that, if he's talking about that, I wanna be a part of it, cause look at how he carries himself. I feel his energy, look at his confidence Like it's everything, man. And so if we're talking about persuasion and leadership and really making an impact. It starts and ends with us, and if our message is not vibrant, if it's not articulate, if our energy's off, it's not gonna have the same effect on people.
Speaker 1:Well, let's talk about that a little bit, because I wanna learn a little bit more and I want the viewers to learn a little bit more about what you're doing to help and I believe you're working mostly with men, and so tell me a little bit about your coaching and what it is that you're doing to make a difference.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So when I got out of prison, I started coaching men in the gym because I wanted to help people. And then, during COVID, I pivoted and took my business online cause. I lost all my clients, all my revenue overnight, right, and I had a young family to take care of. But I knew I wanted to help people with more than just fitness. I wanted to help people overcome depression, addiction, anxiety, right, like mental health all the things that I overcame during my time in prison. I wanted to show other people how to do the same so they could create a life they absolutely love and cherish.
Speaker 2:So fast forward three, four years since I started my coaching business, we now have men from all over the country in my program and it's mindset, it's fitness, it's nutrition. We have an app that they download when they sign up with me and they get daily workouts, they get nutrition coaching, they get mindset coaching and it's more of a brotherhood and a community than just a program. Like we meet every week on Zoom and talk, we do in-person meetups every quarter where we all come together and share about our lives, share about our journey of bettering ourselves. And these guys I'm talking to them daily, messaging them, checking in on them. So the coolest thing that I've seen in men in general is we need a tribe. It's so hard for a guy who's 300 pounds to lose the weight because he's in that same environment with those old habits he's battling internally. It just seems impossible. But you get that same guy around 20 other men who are on that same weight loss journey who are encouraging and supporting him right, and they can see somebody like me who's been through some crazy stuff and overcome it, to inspire them. That's a catalyst for change because that guy starts to believe by seeing everyone else that maybe somehow, some way he could do it if he follows that same path they're on.
Speaker 2:So that's what we're doing. I mean, we have hundreds of guys in my program who are getting sober, improving their mental health, improving their physical health and making a real change in their lives. And so for any man who's listening, if you're looking to be a part of a group like that, you wanna lose weight, you wanna find that drive inside of you and again that purpose, so that every day feels exciting and you're enlivened in the way you're living. Like, reach out to us, man. I wanna empower as many men as possible because there's a ripple effect, like I can't change the whole world. But if I empower hundreds of thousands of men to do that in their communities, for their families, in their business, now, we're gonna reach hundreds of millions of people over time. So that's my mission is to speak on stages, share my content and inspire and show as many men how to change and to create the ultimate lives as possible.
Speaker 1:Well, I tell you what, man. Sometimes we feel like we're not heard and sometimes we feel like we're the only one talking on the screen or in the microphone. But I can tell you, when you went on stage, you connected with me, and that's not easy to do. So I wanna tell you that you were heard. I was impressed by your content. I'm impressed by how you've turned your life around. You're an example of being able to have everything taken away from you and you continue to strive to obviously help others, which I think it's probably the most powerful thing, is to serve right? Yes, there's a financial component to everything, but I think, ultimately, when you really dig in deep into people that are trying to give back, is that they wanna serve, and I think that's really powerful. So, sean, I mean it's been awesome talking to you. How can somebody get a hold of you? Do they go on Instagram? Maybe you can give us some guidance on how someone can get a hold of you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, on Instagram, it's easy at Sean S-E-A-N and then the letter M and then my last name, crane. So Sean M Crane. On Facebook, at Sean Michael Crane. Those are the two major main platforms that I'm on so you can reach out, send me a message. I always answer all my DMs.
Speaker 1:Listen, man, I appreciate your time today. I came up to you afterwards you were gracious enough to talk to me for a few minutes after you went on stage and I came right up to you, man, I'm like, hey, man, you wanna be in my podcast? You're like, fuck, yeah, let's do it. And here we are. So, like you said in the initial promo, say what you're gonna do, right, or don't say it at all. And I appreciate you following through and I wish you the best of success and, man, let's stay in touch and let's stay connected.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, brother. I mean, I appreciate you having me on, love what you're doing. I'm seeing your content, the people you're interviewing, and we need more of this. We need more leaders. We need this type of conversation, cause a lot of people they don't think this way, they don't have these types of conversations.
Speaker 2:So my mission is to get this information, this way of living, out to the masses so we can change what's happening. No pharmaceuticals, nobody overweight, people working out, eating healthy food. They don't have to drink to escape their life. They love their life. Imagine the household that. Imagine the parents raising kids in that type of household, versus the opposite that's taking place. It's personal to me, man. I want to see everyone thrive and happy. So thank you for giving me this platform to share my message on and for anybody that's listening. Man, I just want you to know that inside of you, I know you have a calling to be great, to elevate, to do something different in your life. This is a short journey and that calling in your heart is the path that you need to take. You're much more capable than you realize, but you got to start the process now to find out, so you don't get to the end of your life and have regrets. Don't let that happen to you. I love you guys. Have a great rest of your day, man.
Speaker 1:Thanks, Sean. I appreciate you, man. We'll be talking soon here after this podcast.
Speaker 2:Sounds good brother.
Speaker 1:Well, that was really cool to have Sean on. I appreciate him coming on and I look forward to having another podcast here shortly. We have next week. We got Greg Reed Really excited to talk to him. Man, three feet from gold. He's written so many books, authored, I believe over 150 books. But, man, come follow me, share my podcast with others, with your friends. You know this is not about me, it's about you. I wanna help you. I hope Sean here today inspired you to take one vice out of your life, do one thing different to get you on the right path. Reach out to him if you need help. If you need somebody to inspire, somebody to motivate you, somebody to kick you in the ass, I get it. But you know, with that said, I'm Dr Shane Safarian. Thanks for joining me at another episode of Shane's Corner. Until next time.