SpeakLifeAZ
The testimony of Jesus in, with, and through everyday people like us. A father and son who were addicts for over 20 yrs. You name it, WE DID IT, TOGETHER!!!! we used to use drugs together now we share about what God Has done for us to encourage the body of Christ and anyone else who may listen to this that is feeling hopeless and empty. LISTEN TO OUR STORY...and the testimony of others who feel led to share with you.... GOD BLESS YOU....TODAY WE CHOOSE TO SPEAK LIFE AZ!!!!!!!!!!
SpeakLifeAZ
Dani K. Testimony
How does a vibrant faith journey begin amidst the challenges of a global pandemic? On this heartfelt episode of SpeakLifeAZ, we explore this question as we welcome our guest, Dani K., who courageously opens up about her personal testimony of faith and resilience. We also take a trip down memory lane, recalling the roots of our podcast, born from the need to connect and share stories of transformation during the COVID-19 outbreak. With gratitude, we honor Dani and other inspiring guests whose tales of triumph over adversity continue to uplift our community.
From humble beginnings in a living room to a thriving community in a storefront church, Pastor Bill Abbott's story is one of unwavering faith and dedication. We share personal anecdotes about adapting to the fast-paced life of Mesa, Arizona, and the role faith played in overcoming the challenges of such a transition. This episode touches on the complexities of family dynamics, the secret struggles of a pastor's child with addiction, and the relentless pursuit of recovery. The journey emphasizes vulnerability and authenticity, underscoring the importance of supportive faith-based communities in personal and spiritual growth.
Throughout our conversation, we shine a light on the transformative power of recovery communities like Celebrate Recovery, where openness and honesty pave the way for healing and connection. We dive deep into the universal struggle with anxiety and addiction, reinforcing the message that recovery is a lifelong commitment. As we wrap up, we invite you to become part of the SpeakLifeAZ community, sharing your stories with us and joining us in spreading hope and positivity. Whether through a spontaneous prayer gathering or a heartfelt testimony, every shared story holds the power to inspire and foster resilience.
ready, alright thank you, jesus we're gonna go live in 3, 2, 1. All right, everybody. Welcome back to the Speak Life Bay Z podcast Testimony of Jesus and Everyday People. I'm your host, Eddie, and always with me is my son, Roddy. Jesus, what's going on? Buddy man, dude, what a great day. That was a good one, man it really was.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I practiced piano today, did you? Nice dude? Yeah, man, I'm learning how to roll my my fingers.
Speaker 3:I'm learning some notes, buddy get that little lamb down, yet shut up dude mary, I'm working on it man, I was doing it when you were uh visiting uh house sitting yeah I went over there and was digging in that too oh really, oh yeah, you got on and sat down and started to read the book and I got fingers buddy. Come on, bud I was actually pretty good at it. It shocked me.
Speaker 2:Musically inclined bud Jesus. Yeah, I'm excited for this one brother. Yeah, this is going to be good.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, who'd you?
Speaker 2:bring with you man dude.
Speaker 3:Well, we'd like to man. God made it very clear to honor his kids when they come on. So thank you so much. It's an honor for us to sit down with you and capture your story and hear what God has done in your life and how he's moved. So we just want to honor you in that man and say thank you for that.
Speaker 2:Thank you, glad to be here.
Speaker 4:Absolutely yeah. For me, danny. It's always cool when we get people that we know that are willing to come on and share their testimony.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:It just kind of shows me and Dad, man, that people do believe in what we're doing. Yeah, because a lot of times, man, you feel like, is what I'm doing even making a difference? Yeah, what's the purpose of this?
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 4:And we get people like yourself, man, who we know, who has been through some stuff, man, and has come out the other side.
Speaker 1:Who we've done some life with, done some life with.
Speaker 4:You were there, you saw me moving those metal skate ramps. Remember those metal skate ramps in the middle of the summer, buddy.
Speaker 3:Yeah, my back, don't miss that.
Speaker 4:He just had PTSD, oh man, but it's just, it's a blessing. And so have you ever listened to one of the podcasts before?
Speaker 2:Just the one you sent me today. Okay, about Lacey, yeah.
Speaker 4:Well, so let me pray real quick and then we'll kind of just get into it. Jesus man God, thank you God I. Then we'll kind of just get into it. Jesus man God, thank you God. I thank you for what you're going to do today, lord. I thank you for Danny.
Speaker 4:I just pray for her right now, god, and just if there's any nerves, anxiety, anything like that, in the name of Jesus, just fall away. Thank you, lord. Lord, I thank you that this is a safe place, god, where we can share about what you've done in our life, what you've done with us, what you've done in our hearts, god. So I just pray, lord, that your story gets told today, because it's you, you're the one who's brought Danny through this, everything she's been through. So I thank you that you're going to use this testimony, god and people are going to relate with her. People are going to understand where she's coming from God. So I thank you that you're going to relate with her. People are going to understand where she's coming from God. So I thank you that you're going to use this for your glory, in Jesus name, amen, amen, amen.
Speaker 4:So, danny, when God gave this to us, it was actually 2020. It was during COVID, and even then we didn't. We didn't start doing what he told us to do right away. He told us sit down and record people's testimonies and me and dad, we, we started setting up studios in my room and started doing facebook videos preaching to people all the gods just up there laughing. He's like when are you gonna do what I told you to do? Um, and it's cool because when we came here, man, and a couple years in and um, I went to my pastor. I'm like pastor dave, can I use kids big to set up for the podcast? He's like yeah, um, and now here we are, a couple of years into this thing and it's. It's awesome what God's doing and how he's using the ministry.
Speaker 4:Um, it's not just audio. We're on video on YouTube. If you're out there on the YouTube channel, go ahead and hit that bell to get all the future notifications. Man. But basically what this is, it's just a testimony of Jesus and everyday people. It doesn't matter if you're like myself and you're working at a church and facilities and maintenance and making the wheels spin around Like dad muffler shop out there in the car shop, man cutting up metal and working, or yourself. We are all everyday people. We've all got a story to tell. Um and I think that's that's the beautiful part of this is because I come across. I ask a lot of people hey, we got a podcast, you want to come on and share your testimony a lot? No, I don't have a story or no, I'm private, I, I don't want to share. So when we get a, yes, it really truly we want to honor you, but basically, just a couple different parts of this.
Speaker 4:We want to know who danny is. We want to honor you, but basically just a couple different parts of this. We want to know who Danny is. We want to know where Danny was born, brothers and sisters, mom and dad, what the home was like growing up school, me and dad working in recovery, celebrate recovery. A lot of the hurts, the habits and the hangups that we struggle with as adults, a lot of those things happen as kids Traumas, abuse, if you want to get into any of that man. But I think the most important thing we want to record today is your encounter with Jesus, that moment when God became so real to you and you knew wow, jesus is real and Jesus loves me. Because that encounter is different for everyone. God met me at Teen Challenge at 15th Avenue in Grand. God found my dad in a prison cell. So we want to know where the Lord met you at and then afterwards how your life changed after the encounter.
Speaker 4:Because you know, reading the um and just talking to people, man life change is the evidence of a true encounter with jesus transformation, um, and then, at the very end, I think one of the cool things we do is you're still young man, you're still breathing. God's not done. There's more. There's more for you in life, um. So we want to know what you're hoping for in the future, um, what you, if there's a ministry you feel called to, and just different things, man, so that we can pray for you in the end. But we actually have faithful listeners that pray for every single person that comes on and shares what they're hoping and believing for in the future.
Speaker 2:Awesome yeah, thank you.
Speaker 3:So what was it like growing up, dani man?
Speaker 2:So I grew up on an Indian reservation. My parents were missionaries.
Speaker 1:They're the islam is a god church in parker, arizona.
Speaker 2:Um, basically I was born on a saturday in church on sunday. Um, that's kind of how it went um, okay uh what all I've ever known in his life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, american indian.
Speaker 2:Yeah, navajo apache apache navajo yeah, so wow um, I mean, it literally wasn't the day after, but it was pretty much, you know. So my mom played the organ, my dad led worship and preached, so your dad was a worship leader.
Speaker 3:I did not know that, I didn't know that we didn't have a whole lot yeah okay I can see that.
Speaker 2:I can see that too that's why he took away the tambourine I love you, pastor bill so he, yeah, he led music and my mom played the organ, and so I was, you know, in my carrier next to the next to the organ, while we would have church and, yeah, our, where we lived it was, our trailer was on the church grounds there, so everything we did was church you know, so yeah, that's where where I was born, and we lived there until I was 11 really wow wow, oh my goodness, where'd you go to school out there?
Speaker 2:we had a christian school um at the church.
Speaker 3:The church, oh wow, my uncle joe was the principal.
Speaker 2:Um, my aunt renee was one of the teachers. My mom was one of the teachers and my dad, of course, was Christian school At the church, the church, oh wow, my Uncle Joe was the principal. My Aunt Renee was one of the teachers.
Speaker 1:My mom was one of the teachers.
Speaker 2:Wow, and my dad, of course, was one of the teachers, so that's where I went to school when I was there, wow. I never did public school.
Speaker 3:Really yeah, that's awesome man.
Speaker 4:Because I got family up in Page and up in the navajo reservation and the native americans can be kind of rough towards white people. Yeah, it got that way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was like you're as white as it can be man for a white girl how that had to been crazy it's one of the big reasons why, um, my parents, you know, started really truly praying about god, what God wanted them to do was because there was a lot of picking on and you know as I got older. So that's one of the big reasons why they really started praying. You know about where God was going to send them next.
Speaker 3:Did the Native American kids come to school with you guys too?
Speaker 2:There was a lot. Yeah, there was a lot of them. Yeah, Really yeah.
Speaker 4:Was the school Christian.
Speaker 3:It was a christian school, christian school there, yeah, yeah, okay, wow, man, that's pretty. I remember your dad telling a story about people coming to threaten to kill him oh yeah, that happened quite a bit yeah that's crazy man when was uh people possessed with demons and all kinds of good stuff? Yeah, man that drinking will get you, but spirits yeah they were the worst of the worst drinkers, for sure yeah, it was like you saw that I'm not gonna tell that story, never mind okay no there was somebody that I work with that.
Speaker 3:We had a conversation today about spirits and I was like you're willfully taking them in, dude, yeah but anyways yeah um, so just you weren't just yourself, obviously so no, so it was um.
Speaker 2:I have a sister and she she was born um in lake havas, which is just up the river from where Parker is, and we're seven years apart.
Speaker 4:so You're the oldest? Yeah, I'm the oldest yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:And then I also have two other siblings Sorry, three other siblings, but they're all adopted.
Speaker 3:Yeah, okay, but they came later, right, yeah, much later, yeah, when you guys moved to the town right, yeah, nice man.
Speaker 2:So it's just you and your sister growing up with mom and dad and your uncle and aunts right all kind of in community working at the church my aunt renee and uncle joe they pretty much were, you know, we were all just so close and my cousin shauna, we pretty much spent all our time together.
Speaker 3:So did they live on the property with you?
Speaker 2:guys.
Speaker 4:No, they lived down the street a couple miles, yeah, all right, but still on the indian mess, yeah, yeah, amen yeah, it's different upbringing, for sure but how would you describe your childhood?
Speaker 2:yeah, so I was very, very sensitive child, um, super fearful, um, but again, I'm super sensitive. So I was really sensitive, I think, to a lot of the dark things that were happening, because the American Indian people are very, not superstitious, they're the real deal. They're dabbling a lot of witchcraft.
Speaker 4:So, I was super sensitive to that, so I was very afraid as a child, always, always afraid.
Speaker 2:So when my mom and dad said that I would always say that I would see angels, like god would always show me angels, because I was so afraid all the time so wow, yeah, being that sensitive, you could probably just sense, feel, sense that man feel evil, yeah, and then we would have you know, like um, revivals and things like that, and on the regular you know we would. I would see mom and dad and aunt and uncle casting demons out of people you know so full-on manifesting, so that didn't really help the fear and anxiety too much.
Speaker 4:As a kid you're like what is this?
Speaker 2:This is crazy Right and you know who the power is. But I mean still seeing it like that, as a child, is a lot.
Speaker 3:That's a lot for a kid man.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:I can imagine that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was pretty scary, but um I always, I mean, I knew I was safe but, it was just the sensitivity of the spiritual realm, you know was. I think the mask was off there you know, like we don't see a ton of that stuff, like you know, in our everyday lives here but, there, it was just like the mask was off and it was just. It happened so much more.
Speaker 3:it seems like we know that the enemy doesn't have the capability to be everywhere at one place, so we know that he has his strategic places where he plants his demons.
Speaker 4:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And so areas like that, where you know witchcraft, medicine, men things like that, areas like that, where you know witchcraft, medicine, men, things like that are being practiced. That's like stomping grounds for headquarters for demons to reign.
Speaker 4:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And there you guys are, right in the midst of it.
Speaker 4:Trying to bring up Jesus. You know what I mean. That could be very. You guys ever get attacked. Well, you know my dad. My dad's pretty much a warrior. Oh, yeah, yeah, we.
Speaker 2:I mean never physical, but I mean on the regular. He would have people that would you?
Speaker 3:know come going to kill Abbott right and so threaten to you, know, stab him and you know all kinds of awful things, but yeah, I love how he stood up to him and said not today. You want to tell him, yeah, you're not gonna do. Not doing that today, devil, yeah, my dad's pretty pretty amazing like that.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he is man, I think that's I think that's what drew us to him was just yeah he's just a good, he's just so real yeah, man, if y'all want to hear his testimony, you can go on the speak life az podcast and go check out that testimony.
Speaker 3:Pastor bill abbott, it's funny because older people are are.
Speaker 4:We've had a few older people on our thing, dad, you're not supposed to say that and they kind of, they kind of you got to be nice bud, he's wisdom but they, they like hit high points they highlight their testimony, they don't really go a quick
Speaker 1:highlight. Like your dad, we had to kind of drag some things out of him a little bit you know what I mean, because he was just kind of hitting high points.
Speaker 3:But we've noticed that a lot of people are like that, Like we had our pastor.
Speaker 4:It's hard to get details.
Speaker 3:Our pastor's mom was on and she's, you know, she's wise, believe me.
Speaker 2:Sure, I don't know how to say it. But she was kind of same older you kind of lose your, you know yeah, yeah, whatever it is, but you'll, you'll tell whatever, but yeah, so at a, at 11 yeah, 11, yeah and um. The lord led um, you know, my dad to mesa yeah um, where we started church basically in our living room and then from there it went to a storefront and then from the storefront went to our building that you guys have been at yeah. Out there on Ellsworth and Brown.
Speaker 3:So yeah, with the big plaza, yeah, yeah. What was it like going from the reservation to here?
Speaker 2:It was terrifying because, well, when we came here, I had to go to a public school and you know, parker was Tulane, tulane Road, and so everything was just so much slower paced and just not a lot of people, and so when we came here, it was super terrifying and super scary you know, because there was just Hustle and bustle.
Speaker 3:What school did you go to? Yeah, mountain.
Speaker 2:View no, salk, it was elementary.
Speaker 4:So, I went to Salk.
Speaker 2:Elementary School. Yeah so, but yeah so it was pretty scary coming to the city.
Speaker 1:I guess if you will.
Speaker 2:But you know we were so used to driving 25 miles an hour, you know, and get on the freeway out here, Forget it, You're going to get, you know, hauled over.
Speaker 4:We're all doing 80.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's funny. I mean we collectively, as a society, we determined that 80 is now the speed limit on the freeway.
Speaker 1:Yeah, at least If you ain't going 80, you're getting run over.
Speaker 4:At least Forget it. Get in the right lane, Move over slowpoke.
Speaker 3:So what was it like going from that church to the storefront kind of thing. You know what I mean. Was that different?
Speaker 2:So when we first came here, we started in my parents' living room and then from there, then to the storefront.
Speaker 3:who was in living room, just the family, just family. Pretty much aunts uncles um cousins.
Speaker 2:Yeah, amen, it was just family and we had a few others what drove you guys to the storefront?
Speaker 3:just the need to expand. We started expanding, yeah, yeah, we just it got really. Uh, you know we couldn't have church in our smaller living room you know in 1500 square foot home you know, so we in a bigger numbers yeah numbers drew us there, yeah Come on, you started getting people that were like not family, that started coming Somewhat yeah. Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 1:Once we got to the storefront.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we started getting a lot more people.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So, that's where.
Speaker 4:Ryan showed up to. Yeah, he was in the corner selling stuff.
Speaker 3:What? Who did? Brian bett, oh, oh. And in the storefront yeah, he had a little sales over there that he was selling tools. Oh my gosh, I didn't remember that's how he met your dad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh my gosh, I didn't realize that's how they met.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh my gosh, yeah interesting, so yeah but um so what was school like when you got here?
Speaker 2:So the elementary school was terrifying. It was scary. There was just so many kids. And so again, I was terrified.
Speaker 4:Were you little as a kid. Were you on the littler side.
Speaker 2:Not really, I was probably average.
Speaker 4:Okay, yeah, I was average yeah.
Speaker 2:But then, shortly after that, my mom got a job at a Christian school, and so then, from then on, I went to Christian Christian school private school.
Speaker 4:So a little bit smaller, not as many kids, more, more what you were used to on the res.
Speaker 2:My, my mom worked there. My, my aunt worked there, so I mean it was a lot. It was. I knew more people, so I was a lot more comfortable.
Speaker 4:Any, any sports or any, any hobbies as a kid I was a lot more comfortable. Any sports or any hobbies as a kid.
Speaker 2:I was a singer, so I did the arts stuff In high school. I did choir and drama and that kind of stuff, but never sports. No, I wasn't a sports kid Did you ever pick up an instrument Piano somewhat.
Speaker 1:I'm learning Not enough so.
Speaker 4:I didn't like to practice.
Speaker 2:Yeah, sing, and I still sing there at the church, so Amen.
Speaker 4:How was school for you being on the res and then coming into the public school and then the Christian school? How were your grades? How was school for you? Was it something that was hard? I did good.
Speaker 2:I did pretty good. I got pretty good, pretty decent grades. Okay, I did pretty good, I got pretty good pretty decent grades. Math and science not so much, but the other ones I did fine in. I mean, I wasn't like a straight A student, but I was probably A B student.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, where do you think this? It seems like you have this growing up. You had this spirit of fear Even when you left the reservation. What do you think that derives from?
Speaker 2:I don't know it started. You know I started living on the reservation with all of the evil activity. You know that was happening and then it just kind of like.
Speaker 3:You think that was like the root? Of it maybe Just seeing all the demonic activity. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, and then I was just a very anxious child, you know.
Speaker 2:Just always. You know I watched. My grandma's house was also on the property there in parker, and so I watched her house burn down.
Speaker 4:So I mean just just stuff like that, but yeah, so I think that's where it started.
Speaker 2:For me was the fear you know, peace but, um, it maybe got a little bit better, um, as I got a little bit older, but I don't know why it just seemed to that's been.
Speaker 4:My thing is fear yeah, okay, amen fear, so amen I'm still struggling with it, man. God's working through me with a fear of a lady and letting a woman come into my life because I'm like it's crazy, danny, I'm almost 40 man. Well, I am 40 and I live at home with my parents, you know and and it just it's a, but you know what's?
Speaker 4:crazy is. Last week I was kind of wrestling with God man and when's she going to come, lord? And you know he told me. He said you're letting the fear of hurting a woman keep you from the joy of loving one.
Speaker 1:I was like dang.
Speaker 4:So, god, I mean fear is like dang. So, god, I mean fear is real man. We all struggle with different things in life, right, you know?
Speaker 2:so it just uh when I gave that up, that the fear of not being married, that's when it seemed to happen.
Speaker 4:Oh, for me.
Speaker 2:I always thought that I would find my husband in church.
Speaker 2:You know, I thought, oh, being a, a church kid, you know I'm gonna marry some missionary and we're gonna go minister and you know, south America, or something right, and that's what I always thought and wasn't happening, like that didn't happen, like that. And then didn't meet him in church. But I mean God had a plan, brought him in and you know, save, sanctify, got holy ghost, you know, and so, but yeah, so it didn't. It didn't happen for me until I let it. Let it go you know I just said it's never gonna happen.
Speaker 2:So what the heck? And he was actually a blind date, so it was pretty crazy god brought it out of a space that I didn't think it would come from. Come on no so but um, but yeah when did you guys meet?
Speaker 2:We met. Well, we got married in 2002. So what? 2001, 2000,. We met. We didn't date very long. I think we both kind of knew it was what we both wanted, and come to find out it's what God wanted. So that's when we met, we got married in 2002. And then, shortly after that, Austin know, Austin came in, oh three. We weren't married very long before we had our first child, um. And then I've got three. I've got Austin and then Haley.
Speaker 4:Austin's in the military right now he is. Love you, Austin, Praying for you bro.
Speaker 2:He's in Romania actually.
Speaker 4:Romania yeah.
Speaker 2:He's deployed right now.
Speaker 4:Isn. He's in Romania, actually Romania. Yeah, he's deployed right now. Isn't that crazy it is. That's a little God moment, right there considering where all the adoptions and stuff came from, and now that's crazy, yeah, man.
Speaker 2:It's terrifying as a mom, you know you're first born and he wants to, of course, go on the Rangers and all that kind of stuff. But just put it in God's hands because I, you know, I want to keep him in this little bubble keep him safe, and I can't, I can't do it, so gotta let him live much more capable than I am. So, um, yeah, and then my daughter came along.
Speaker 4:How old were you when you met her?
Speaker 2:I was 27, oh wow, oh yeah, I was older okay, so high school.
Speaker 4:You finished high school. When'd you graduate?
Speaker 2:94 I graduated, so it was a while yeah and so you were staying with mom and dad in mesa yep and working.
Speaker 4:What were you doing for work?
Speaker 2:well, I worked at a bunch of different places. Um, I worked for the boeing company for a while, did wire harnesses for. Oh, wow, wow um boeing like aircraft. Wow, yeah, I did that for a while thanks um, I did um. I was a dental assistant for a while um had a lot of different jobs just trying to find your place and yeah, and then I was. I worked for dillard's department store selling makeup, so done quite a few things.
Speaker 4:Did you feel called to ministry?
Speaker 2:I always felt I was called to ministry, but not.
Speaker 4:Full time, that kind of thing yeah.
Speaker 2:I was always the helper. I was always kind of the back scenes type person and I've always sung, but I've always been a backup singer. I'm not so I guess it been a backup singer.
Speaker 4:You know, I'm not.
Speaker 2:So I guess it's not a. There's not a name given to it. I guess full-time ministry. It's just kind of like whatever needs to happen.
Speaker 4:Whatever it takes. You know, that's what. That's what we say. Yeah, I mean, whatever needs done, get it done.
Speaker 2:Our family, you know, was basically, you know, doing everything the church needed. And if something needed to be done, you just do it, and that's just. You know, that's what my dad taught me, and you just see something.
Speaker 3:That's kind of how you grew up. Yeah, just I mean see, knowing your family, the way we do is just whatever it takes man. If you're family, you're in.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. Absolutely, you're going to help out in some way. Shape. That's awesome man.
Speaker 3:Yeah, any dating after high school. Did you have?
Speaker 2:any. No, I liked a lot of different guys, but there was nothing any serious. You know, I was boy crazy.
Speaker 4:Bring home some boys. Pastor Bill, like no, get out of here Between my dad and my Uncle Joe. Yeah, uncle Joe's a big man. It's not happening, so yeah.
Speaker 1:Love you, Uncle.
Speaker 3:Joe, I can see your dad now that happening. So yeah, I could see you.
Speaker 2:Love you, uncle joe I could see your dad now that's. That's freaking hilarious yeah, yeah uncle joe's in heaven.
Speaker 3:So yeah, but yeah, yeah, he.
Speaker 2:Well, you knew that he had passed away but anyway amen. Um, yeah, so we met um, got married no two, and then I had austin in 03 and then um we had waited till um the 08 daughter was born and then, in 2010, my youngest was born.
Speaker 3:Brayden yeah, Brayden yeah.
Speaker 2:So my daughter's 16. She just got her license.
Speaker 1:That's crazy.
Speaker 2:That's crazy.
Speaker 3:She was like yeah, we were there, yeah.
Speaker 1:It seems like we were just there a couple years ago, but it's actually been.
Speaker 4:Six years. Yeah, it's been a while.
Speaker 2:Times wise man years, but it's been a while time.
Speaker 3:Wise man, that's crazy dude. Yeah, she just got her license and we just bought her a car.
Speaker 4:So, oh no, scary, scary, letting her out on those. How are you keeping this one safe, mom? Yeah, not so much. It's you, god. She's in your hands, lord. Yeah, oh man.
Speaker 2:And then brayden, of course.
Speaker 4:You know he's a little rough and tumbumbling kid Saved the best for last Running around all over the place.
Speaker 2:So lots of good stories with him.
Speaker 4:He's keeping you young, ma, at least keeping you on your toes, that's right, man, for sure. Pay attention to me, for sure, yeah.
Speaker 3:So how'd you guys get the building, the building that you guys are in now?
Speaker 2:So my cousin sean were you guys always sport?
Speaker 3:no, you guys were simply guys. How'd you guys get to four square? Yeah?
Speaker 2:yeah, we were ag for a long, long time how'd you guys get to be four? Square. Well, my, my, my cousin anointed that the land there and um there was nothing out there. I forget yeah no, there wasn't I forget exactly how we became four square. I think we needed, we needed, uh, some funding to be able to do the building and all that kind of stuff, and that's when we had joined the Foursquare denomination, because our church plant.
Speaker 3:They like church plants. Yeah, I'll never forget when we were there, your dad took me for a walk around the property and I'll never forget this man and I tell people this all the time that he stopped and looked back and he said the only mistake I ever made was and he was talking about the building.
Speaker 1:He said that's all I was believing god for.
Speaker 3:He says I wish I would believe god for a bigger building, a huge land and in my mind. The one thing I heard is this is what I took from it.
Speaker 4:God's only going to give you what you believe what you, what you believe in for, and so, from that day on, man, I always tell people be careful what you believe in God, for because that's what he's going to give you. He's a big guy.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:Makes sense yeah, yeah, I'll never forget that, man, yeah.
Speaker 4:Love God and love people.
Speaker 3:Tell him the truth.
Speaker 4:That was the second one, dad man he just, it was so simple yeah, just the simplicity of the gospel man, and that's what I needed in that season absolutely I made a shirt that says that did you yep says love god, love people.
Speaker 3:Tell them the truth.
Speaker 2:That's awesome. Yeah, that is awesome, yeah yeah, we were.
Speaker 3:So when was that? That was 2017. Yeah, we were called to to do street. We wanted to do park outreaches and things like that, and I talked to one of the pastors here and he was like we're in. Gilbert, we don't really have that kind of need here.
Speaker 4:Oh, you see the black.
Speaker 3:And here's the mistake I made was I left my covering to go find somebody who could help me understand what that looked like. And somebody told us about your dad and it was like go find Pastor Bill, he can tell you all about it. You know what I mean and that's what we did. So we went to your dad just to gain knowledge and understanding of what street ministry looked like. You know what I mean.
Speaker 4:Well, we were going to three churches. I had just I had just come back from california and out there in california I was a part of living word and they're four square, okay. Um so, and being was pastor ryan. Pastor ryan told me about pastor bill. Okay, and I knew pastor bill was four square and I was out in four square. I well, all right, we'll go check out.
Speaker 1:Foursquare.
Speaker 4:So we were checking out Foursquare, we were coming here and then Sunday afternoons we'd go into Living Word and Mesa at Pastor Jeff Wow. Yeah we were doing these three man, oh my gosh, and it was like it was our Jesus tour. We were Just trying to find you know the place and what God was going to do with us man. And being here it was because I personally would like look at pastor and I'm like what does this guy know about the hell that I've been through?
Speaker 2:This dude's blessed man yeah.
Speaker 4:And so that one thought took me out of my home, where God's called me to, and I went over out into East Mesa. It was my wilderness season. I literally left my covering to go out so I could do ministry, and I fell flat on my face.
Speaker 1:And we did ministry.
Speaker 4:We did ministry, but it was, we did ministry.
Speaker 3:We did ministry, but it was it was us, it was us, it was us doing ministry. See what people don't understand man is is. You can do ministry and God not be in it.
Speaker 4:Yep, you know what I mean. Yep, just a lot of work.
Speaker 3:You can do that and that's what we did we. We left our covering to and we did I mean.
Speaker 4:Those skate ramps, that was a lot of work. Yeah yeah, the park outreaches, man, those were a lot of work. Right, the food bank, that was a lot of work, my God.
Speaker 3:And did we help a lot of people? Yeah, we did. Yeah, we did, we did. Did we bless a lot of people? Of course we did. Was God? It was a rough time for us. It was us laboring right and us laboring without god, and I remember there was a time that god was like you guys got way ahead of me man, yeah, it's so hard, though it's so hard to know, you know sometimes because I'm a runner yeah, god gives me a word and I'm gone you know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And then I get somewhere and I'm like where you at god and he's like dude, we're still back we still got a lot to work on back here, man. You got way ahead of me, dude, and that's what happened in that season was we took off running and God was not with us. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Right, yeah, it's very difficult to know sometimes, though.
Speaker 3:Yeah, what I learned in that was just because God gives you a word doesn't mean you just take off and go do it. You got to start praying and asking God where's the people that are going to?
Speaker 1:do this when?
Speaker 3:are you in it?
Speaker 1:How are?
Speaker 3:we going to do this and pray man. Because it's easy to get a word from God and just take off.
Speaker 4:Make your garage the food bank pantry. Mom freaking out, get this stuff out of here.
Speaker 3:We did. We went and bought freezers.
Speaker 4:Man dude shelves in our garage. Yeah, and it was a lot of work. It was pissing. Yeah, mom and dad weren't in a good place. I was gone every day. Yeah, man.
Speaker 3:Because, in order to have a park outreach, you had to go put out flyers to let people know you were going to be at the park, and that takes time.
Speaker 3:Every afternoon, every afternoon. So wednesday, thursday or tuesday. Wednesday, up till thursday, outreach we were driving through neighborhoods handing out flyers to let people know, hey, we're going to be at the park and it. It took every free time I had because you got to go get the food from the food bank, you got to come home and sort it out, then you got to make your boxes and you got to go push out the flyer.
Speaker 2:My god and it was a yeah you guys were running that out of your home. Yeah, oh, my goodness, I didn't know that. Yeah.
Speaker 4:And we wanted to run it out of the church, but it was out of our home. There was a time we literally showed up to a park.
Speaker 3:My biggest fear was we were going to go do all this and nobody was ever going to show up. There was always somebody and God promised me he'd always bring somebody, and we were literally there for man an hour and a half. Nobody showed up. My biggest fear had come true.
Speaker 4:We're packing up and loading everything up. Just as we closed the tailgate with the last thing, somebody rolls up on a bike. Oh, you're leaving. No man, we were just unloading, bro, Unloaded all for the one Tuesday.
Speaker 3:We turned around and unloaded everything and went back over there and cooked some more hot dogs and fed that one dude and wow, yeah, it was a lot of work, man.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I would love to do it again, with god in it in god's timing.
Speaker 3:You know what I mean, because it's still something that's very much needed. Um, and those are my people. I know that god's called me to those people because we all know that there's certain people that certain people can reach, and those are my people. Prisoners and people on the streets. Man, those are my people. God is very clear that you're going to reach those people.
Speaker 2:Well, with your story they can relate to your story.
Speaker 3:Dudes in suit and tie. Leave those to the dudes in suit and tie. I'll reach them.
Speaker 4:I'll get their pocketbooks. Sow a seed in Jesus' name. That was your specialty, right?
Speaker 1:He Sow a seed in Jesus' name.
Speaker 3:That was your specialty right, he can get any. Oh Lord, help me. God, he's just so full of life that people just flop to him.
Speaker 4:I would go into businesses man trying to sell this chocolate and people would be like no get the heck out of here. I'm like, well, can I just bless your business. I'd pray for him Get over here.
Speaker 1:What is that? Chocolate you got, yes, got so, uh, all right.
Speaker 4:So 2001, you meet eric. Um, you're in your late 20s, you've done a myriad of jobs and you knew right away that eric was the one for you pretty much.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it didn't. It didn't take long um for me to know um, so there was just you know that piece. And then you know you talk about waiting and you know I'd waited, and it just one thing. You know everything would fall into place. You know, we just had everything in common and you know he had a background in church and, of course, my background in church. So yeah, it didn't't take long.
Speaker 2:and then we got married and um, after my first child, austin, I started having um, this kind of what led me into my um, where I got involved with drugs and stuff so, um, I started having really bad panic attacks when I had austin and um, I went to a psychiatrist who, unbeknownst to me, was very liberal in her medication management and her answer was lots of Xanax. So she would give me huge bottles of Xanax and I was also having back pain at the time, so she was giving me hardocodone for my back pain. So it didn't take my brain long to realize that the xanax is amazing I don't have to feel I can just be numb and just exist um, and so you know, between that and the pain pills it was a bad combination and it got out of hand real fast how old were?
Speaker 2:you what 27, 28, 29, what 32, 31. So yeah, and that's pretty much that's what started my history when it came to drugs and alcohol.
Speaker 4:So this is like growing up as a kid on the res you weren't drinking and dabbling no.
Speaker 2:In high school you weren't messing around no, it wasn't until this time when wow Because drinking, I mean, was already new in Dad's house, you know, there's just no way. That's just you know, in his eyes, people that drank were the drunks that hung out at the DQ in the streets, you know, lane. So it was never an option and I also had a pretty strong fear of it so a healthy fear of it, you know. But um, but then once I started getting those prescriptions, that's when it got yeah pretty crazy, pretty fast um did, how did?
Speaker 4:uh, because you're still going to church yeah you're, you're singing right and background and the struggle starts coming in. Yeah, and you. Well, you know, I mean I was getting high in in church in the bathroom right you know, so it just got out of hand real fast yeah it's you know, I would.
Speaker 2:And then, during that time, I also started experimenting with alcohol. So I mean, I was mixing alcohol, xanax, xanax and paying pills, you know. Man, that's a bad combination I would run out of my Xanax early because I would finish, you know, a three-day prescription in a day you know, or something. And then I would you know, multiple trips to the ER because I had had seizures, and so it just was many, many years of that. And in 2018, my sister actually staged a. They did an intervention.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh, really.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I came home and all of my family was in my living room. Wow, I already knew what they were there for, you know and so. But at that time I was, I say, running and gunning, but, like you know, all of the hiding and the secrecy you know was just, and once I did, once I saw them there, I was just like okay, it was just such a relief.
Speaker 3:I'm like okay, fine, everybody, everybody knows even though they always, they always did know but I didn't think that they knew what was happening. We always think we're secretive, right?
Speaker 2:yeah, nobody knows they all know, yeah, so my sister had um the treatment place picked out. She had already checked all my insurance um everything, found a bed for me, and so and so you, you said this is 2018 2018 and you said that the at 32 in prescription pills and stuff so it just yeah, I mean that the whole time
Speaker 2:frame for me was like it was. It's like a blur, because um xanax stills your yeah your memory yeah, no memory so like people would ask me dates and that kind of stuff and I really don't have, like I would have, periods of sobriety here and there, um but nothing long term yeah um.
Speaker 2:So when 2018 when she's you know when we did that um went into treatment, I did a 30-day inpatient and then I did a two-month IOP after that, okay, and then I ended up I had four years of sobriety, so I mean, I got a pretty long stretch there.
Speaker 4:Yeah, wow. So when we showed up you had just gotten clean.
Speaker 2:But you guys couldn't know that. You couldn't know that I struggled right. Because, again, the pastor's's family, the pastor's kid you can't have any. You can't have any issues right I mean, it's you're supposed to have it all together you gotta be the example for everybody that's the mindset, yeah I hate that for pat for just yeah, kids, that are pretty frustrating you know and
Speaker 2:it's the just. The spotlight is on you. There's different things are expected from you and that's just the way it is, and so that, I think, kept me in my addiction so much longer, because I can't let anybody know I had to hide it right you know, and my aunt's finding shot bottles in my diaper bag, you know stuff like that you know, Wow so yeah, pretty much nobody knew you know at least congregation-wise. My family all did.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But people in our churches didn't know.
Speaker 4:Wow, dang, and you know this was the mindset.
Speaker 2:Is you had to keep it quiet?
Speaker 3:you know, and just sneak. Especially being a pastor's kid. So, we were talking before about how that stigma of being, you know, a pastor's kid how, yeah, how, you got to be perfect.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you know, and people forget that even if you're a pastor's kid, you're still. You're still a person. We still have struggles, we still have. We're still living in this right fleshly body and and for you it wasn't like you went to the streets and and and were getting high, it was a prescription thing, you know what I mean. That led into that.
Speaker 3:Yep, and I think, man, you know, just knowing pastor's kids that I do now, and knowing the stigma that the outside world puts on them not not just necessarily their family, but other people that are seeing you, are like they're holding you to the standard that's. It's not. It's a standard that you are not qualified or equipped to reach, because you're just a person, right and being a pastor's kids. Just like we put pastors up on pedestals yeah, we put their family and their kids up there too, and that's my goal in this. My goal was having you on. Was that maybe a pastor's kid will hear your story and will speak up and share that they're struggling, because we need pastor's kids to know that, just because your mom or dad are running a church or a pastor of a church that there's still, you still are susceptible to the world and the things that are in it, that it's okay to let somebody know.
Speaker 2:Hey, I'm struggling I mean because you think it's going to look bad on your parents if they really knew that my addiction had gotten that bad it's going to look bad. Yeah, you know so, and you last that bad.
Speaker 3:It's going to look bad, and you last thing you wanted your parents to look bad, so you're trying to hide it, to protect your parents while you're still struggling. You know what I mean? Yeah, and I'm glad your sister did what she did, and I'm glad that they did what they did for you.
Speaker 2:I'm grateful. I mean, at the time, you know, you were angry but then again, at that point I had done Well.
Speaker 3:we're always angry when we're caught in our addiction. He got caught.
Speaker 4:We're like can't get up there was also a Were you ready there was also a peace and there was also like okay, you were ready, I don't have to carry it any longer, you know Amen point, I didn't care, I didn't care who knew that I had a problem, because I just it was over.
Speaker 2:You know, the fight was over, keeping everything quiet was over, and and it was the hardest and you talk about when you knew Jesus that's when I really got a hold of God. Yeah, because up to that point I had never had anything so hard happen.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But when you are stuck in that addiction like that it is so, it's just so lonely. And when I finally gave up and said, okay, god, fine.
Speaker 2:You know, when I was in that treatment center the first night detoxing, god was so real yeah because at that point I didn't have anybody else yeah you don't have a choice, you don't have anybody there, it's just you, and you know crappy mattress, crappy food, dark room, know no pictures on the wall, it just and just. I've never felt more alone and that's when, god, truly I guess that's when I truly was at my end, you know where I said okay, god, I really got to get a hold of you, because if I don't, I'm going to number one. Number one I'm gonna die. If I keep doing this, keep combining stuff, um, I'm gonna lose my, my marriage, I'm gonna lose my kids. I mean, by that time, it's just a grace of god that I didn't yeah, I didn't get a dui, that I didn't kill my kids, kill myself or kill somebody else because the amount of times I drove, intoxicated, with my children yeah I should have had a crazy amount of duis, wow and done prison time yeah
Speaker 4:and so it was, it was years yes it was a long, it was super long time.
Speaker 2:Wow, danny yeah, just you know flop floundering around like a you know fit and my, my parents were doing the best that they knew how to do to help me yeah you know, they really hadn't walked a road like this with anybody yeah um, and then for a good while they didn't really know how, um, how deep it was how much it. You know how much I had been doing yeah and um combining, you know, combining things I should have been dead.
Speaker 3:yeah, um, especially for as long as you did it, because it was probably a good 10 years or so that you were Super long yeah.
Speaker 2:Again with the bandazanics. I did the you know dates and all kinds of stuff escapes me because it does, it robs your memory.
Speaker 1:If you take it appropriately, it doesn't but of course that's not the way I took it, so but then that's you know, the first night in treatment is when I really I got right with God and.
Speaker 2:I really was legit and for the first time, just authentic.
Speaker 3:Would you say before that moment there, that growing up in the family that you grew up in, that it was just?
Speaker 4:what we do.
Speaker 3:It was just what we do, we're a family. You know what I mean we just go to church, we do all these things, you know I know god, I I read my bible. We do these things, but the relationship I think, a lot of times. I heard somebody say the other day that how do we, how do we really know if we never really have a struggle, how do we know we need a savior?
Speaker 3:right, you know that song, yeah, yeah, yeah and um, would you say, up until that moment you really just god was just so natural and so in your part of your life that you didn't really realize until that moment that I'm in this place.
Speaker 2:I need, I need this savior, that I mean I, you know, with youth and stuff I would you know at camps and things like I you know with youth and stuff I would you know at camps and things like that I would you know, get filled with the Holy Spirit and slain and you know.
Speaker 4:Holy Ghost time. Oh, so you had a couple encounters with God and stuff growing up.
Speaker 2:Up to that point, I had several encounters with God.
Speaker 4:Like.
Speaker 2:I had really, you know, experienced the power of the Holy Spirit, and but to where? To where I I needed. I was at my end. I could not what I was going through. I could not, I could not handle it anymore. I could not, I could not not use, I could not not combine stuff you know, and so, yeah, I mean, that's when I really, for me, God is always there, right, but we have to be the ones to be at that place. You know where, God, you got to do this. I can't do it.
Speaker 1:I can't save myself now.
Speaker 4:Broken before the Lord. Yeah, I was just sharing on a relapse. Last night in Celebrate Recovery I taught the lesson and one of the things I was talking about was we determine our proximity to God, we determine how close we are in our relationship with him by how we seek him, by how we follow him by how we obey him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, us, yeah.
Speaker 2:Man. Yeah, so it was the hardest thing I've ever done, but it was absolutely the best thing I've ever done. Yeah, you know, and because of all the years of using and everything like God has already used my story to help other people, you know like I've been very outspoken now on Facebook about it and.
Speaker 3:I've had people that you were very open with us when we came to your church, because I remember you sharing about this kind of stuff.
Speaker 4:I remember you opening up with me because we had struggled with addiction and you and we had just gotten there.
Speaker 3:You were probably one of the people that we made a good connection with.
Speaker 4:A connection with because you were real with us, because of the similarity and the proximity of our stories even though
Speaker 2:you know.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you were probably one of the ones that we really just felt that connection with.
Speaker 2:We junkies got to fit together stick together.
Speaker 4:We know our people. It takes one to recognize one.
Speaker 2:Oh, my God Struggling with addiction is the most humbling.
Speaker 1:It really is.
Speaker 2:I say being an addict, I mean if you're an addict, you're not always going to be an addict. I know that, but it is the most humbling thing.
Speaker 4:It is.
Speaker 2:You know, to struggle with something like that that you just can't function without it. You know that you just can't function without it.
Speaker 3:You know, it's literally being out of control For me. I think one of the things that I learned in the beginning of my recovery was I cannot let myself get out of control again. So I started becoming almost a control freak in every aspect of my life. You know what I mean. I control where I'm at, what I'm doing, who I'm seeing, who I'm calling, who I'm talking to that I just became such a control freak yeah, because it was 20 years of just being out of control yeah, doing whatever my mind is I have to be in control now and I might still be struggling with that a little bit to be honest with you that I still have to control my environment.
Speaker 1:We got a group for that right I.
Speaker 3:Talk about it in a small group. But you know what I mean. That was my thing, that's how I helped myself in the beginning stages of my recovery was to control every aspect of your life and don't be out of control.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 3:Because I knew that other thing was out of control and I didn't ever want to be out of control again.
Speaker 2:Sure you know what.
Speaker 4:I mean Right, yeah, well, I to be out of control again. Sure. I mean right, yeah, yeah, we got buddy. Uh, it's well, I'm just thinking I'm like man 2018. So she goes through it. She goes in. There's the recovery centers, um, she starts working in recovery and then, covid dang.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was very involved in um a narcotics anonymous program. I had a home group and everything oh wow I was leading meetings and that kind of stuff, yeah. And then COVID hit and then everything was shut down. Yeah, and then there was the online platform. That started happening, so I was leading meetings online for my recovery group there oh wow. I was also somewhat active in Celebrate Recovery here and there.
Speaker 1:So, but not to the extent I had gotten with my home group for Narcotics Anonymous.
Speaker 2:But you know, and I had a good four years clean time but I stopped doing the work right? I stopped working. A program. I stopped, you know, meeting the Lord and focusing on.
Speaker 3:You know I, if I don't right now, you know if I don't come on continue um seeking him you know and that's what I did.
Speaker 2:And someone had a prescription and I soon found out and I was I was on again.
Speaker 3:You know, and me and rowdy have a saying he used it last night is if you're not in active recovery, you're on your way to active addiction. As an addict, as a former addict, with our mentalities, you have to work this thing daily, absolutely it took me two years to understand this because when I first started coming to Celebrate Recovery, I'm like I just want to be fixed.
Speaker 4:I want to be fixed and go on with my life, go back to life. I'm good and I just want to be.
Speaker 3:I just want to be better and that's real man. Here I am two years into it and I'm. I'm just. I realize now, no, this is, this has to be my life lifestyle, because if I'm not actively doing this and even even my team will tell me to take a monday off and I'm like I can't, I'm not here because I have to be, or I'm here because I need to be here because if I'm not here, then I'm missing out on the opportunity to be engaged in my recovery recovery, you know, I mean because if I miss, then it's going to be okay to miss again and it's going to miss again, and then it's still going to kill.
Speaker 3:Well, just this one time I can do this.
Speaker 4:And then it leads into you're right back into active addiction that hidden life, and it's it's easy to get there, man.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 3:So we always tell people, if you're not in active recovery, you're on your way to active addiction again. There's no middle ground.
Speaker 2:You're either active recovery or you're on your way to addiction. Again, I'm one pill away? Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 3:But I'm glad you said that, man, because people need to understand that that we can get to a place of complacency where oh man. I'm good, I can relax. I haven't used in 10 years. I have somebody, I know that was clean 18 years, but they got away from church.
Speaker 4:Somebody showed up at the job and had a sack.
Speaker 3:They got away from people that they had their best interest. Somebody showed up with some meth and before you know it, they were on an eight-month bender again. Yeah, it happened After 18 years.
Speaker 2:I know you would think that, right, I have it figured out now, yeah.
Speaker 3:Good, but all it took was somebody to show up and oh, yeah, cool. I can do this just for this one time, and boom, you're on an eight month. You know what I mean, yeah, and so for me it's like, yeah, hearing stories like that, though, makes you, yeah, yeah, I better watch myself. But for me it reminds me that if I'm not in community, that's a sunday church, that's that's life groups throughout the week, my monday night recovery groups if I am not intentional at being at those places and being around those people, then I'm susceptible to that, to fall back to that 100%.
Speaker 4:Got to have your accountability Dude. So much, man.
Speaker 3:I'm glad you brought that up, sis. You know what I mean. That's so good. People need to know that man.
Speaker 2:Well, the slogan, just for today, that's, you know so true. I don't know what even tonight might hold.
Speaker 4:One day at a time.
Speaker 3:Right now.
Speaker 2:When you were in your addiction, did you think your husband ever had any uh knowledge?
Speaker 1:yes, my, oh gosh, absolutely my husband is um, he's actually well.
Speaker 2:He's had issues with alcohol, yeah, you know.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he's sort of the one that introduced me to alcohol, because up to that point I had not oh, drank yeah okay so um, but yeah so he's had, he's got a whole he's got his struggle recovery story that he will have to get him on here and share his podcast he'd absolutely love to, just so you know your husband was wonderful to us.
Speaker 3:I love him.
Speaker 4:He was the only man at that church that he would sow seeds into us in the speak life. He'd come up and just give me a hundred dollars.
Speaker 2:I'm just like that's awesome your husband really touched my, my life yeah, we appreciate him, just so you know, yeah, he's got an amazing story, yeah, so so yeah I'll be scheduling you get ready.
Speaker 4:So I was the addict.
Speaker 1:He was the alcoholic right, so we were simultaneously using so our home was pretty, pretty crazy yeah all like from when you started having kids, yeah, oh, at a very young age super, yeah, my oldest son of okay he's.
Speaker 2:He was the one that pretty much experienced the most, really, um, you know, and my daughter somewhat, and my youngest brayden not so much, because he was so small at the time yeah but yeah, so they've got a lot of unhealthy memories that you know. I just have to give it to God and hopefully I'm, you know, doing my best and they're proud of me you know now, and Eric now, of what we've been doing.
Speaker 2:You know, they know how hard it is, because they lived it with us, you know, and we relied on my parents so many more more times than I can count to keep them on a weekend keep them. You know my sister and her husband and, um, you know just that family. They would take care of my kids when we were doing our thing you know and um, so yeah, it's we. Yeah, he was the alcoholic and I was the addict, and so, yeah, it was pretty crazy tumultuous. And but we're only here because you know my parents prayed, you know I prayed, we prayed you know, and that's the only reason why.
Speaker 3:Grace of.
Speaker 1:God, both of us are still alive, and you know, we don't have any issues with.
Speaker 2:CPS Austin's the one that told your dad I think rowdy's smoking weed, did he?
Speaker 1:oh my god I think I smelled weed on rowdy, really. Yeah, oh my gosh yeah.
Speaker 3:So they all came to me and was like, really, oh my god, I was four years clean.
Speaker 4:When I went there, when I showed up to mesa east East, I was four years clean. And that guy who I ended up getting from Teen Challenge to come and live with us, johnny, me and him started hiding the drinking, and the drinking is where it all they'd go to sleep and I could go sneak out and the drinking turned to dope and that's where I just fell off the map.
Speaker 3:That's why, one day, I just never came back. I was lost again. That's why, one day, I just never came back. I was lost again. That's why we could open our home to people.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh no, you have to protect your absolutely. You have to protect your family and your home.
Speaker 3:Because we thought we were going to use our home to start a men's home and kind of start there with him and Johnny, and then all that happened and that's when, I was like we happened, and that's when I was like my, we ain't bringing another dude in this house.
Speaker 4:I don't care who they are, I mean for you. Well, I'm sorry that austin said that. No, it's good, it's good, it was good. You can laugh about it now, but yeah, at the time not so much. How do you know what wheat smells like young man probably because his friends, yeah, I'm sure but doing those man, those skate ramps?
Speaker 2:dude god dude.
Speaker 3:I mean, as fun as that was and I loved seeing the kids do, they were having fun and but those things were so much work right so much work. I mean they're still they were solid steel ramps. Right, it's insane trying to move one of those things with a dolly.
Speaker 2:Oh my broke your guys' back. It was crazy.
Speaker 3:It was crazy. I told Rowdy one time after that I'm like dude. I don't know if I can keep doing this.
Speaker 2:My back is trash. I don't see how you guys moved them.
Speaker 3:The will of God.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't see.
Speaker 4:Where there's a will, there's a way.
Speaker 2:I know, my dad would be out there doing it too.
Speaker 3:Well, I was like you guys want to do something around here, do the raps yeah let's
Speaker 1:yeah.
Speaker 4:Yeah, let's start that ministry up again. Oh geez, but.
Speaker 3:I still get these video clips on Facebook of the kids skating and stuff and I still get this great feeling in my heart just to see those kids just enjoying.
Speaker 4:Well, they're a seed sown bro.
Speaker 2:We've had yeah we've had some of them still come back, like you know, to our church you know here and there and said, yeah, I used to go to your skate ministry and you know it's like wow
Speaker 3:that's amazing the bike thing out back and just I mean I can imagine, because I heard stories back in the day when that thing was just popping and thriving and just how kids in the neighborhood. I mean what a wonderful place to have. Yeah. I mean before there were skate parks. Right To be able to have this church that had this huge call for us.
Speaker 2:Oh, dude, yeah, and we thought it would continue. You know, continue and I don't know. I mean, I guess the need just kind of filled out, it's the laborers, it's the workers. The men got older and they become heavier to move.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean because we went to your church there was a lot of older people.
Speaker 1:A lot of older guys.
Speaker 3:You need young guys to do it, when we started saying, oh, we're going to do escape ministry?
Speaker 4:again a lot of them said, oh, we did that for a season. They didn't want to help because they knew. They knew what was coming. We didn't know what was coming, we had to step into it to find out, right?
Speaker 2:Just kidding.
Speaker 3:I think the most beautiful part about that season with you guys was my mother-in-law Mother-in-law was later in life.
Speaker 1:I love you, Grandma. She was later in her years.
Speaker 3:And we would go pick her up and take her and she loved it.
Speaker 4:She loved that church. You know what I mean. She loved it. And your dad would always come around, get on me and come to Grandma, get down on her level.
Speaker 3:You know what I mean, and just I mean, your dad did that with everybody. You know what I mean. And just to that season, right, there was I I'll. I will always cherish that moment because of my mother-in-law and having that time with her when nobody else. She was older and it was I mean, she had a walker and stuff, it was a wheelchair, we'd have to put her in. A lot of people didn't want to deal with her because of that, but for us to go pick her up every Sunday.
Speaker 4:Take her to church.
Speaker 3:Take her to church. Yes, you know what I mean Go get breakfast, lunch afterwards or whatever. You know what I mean, just those times man was special for me. You know what I mean. That's awesome. And not to mention your dad. Your dad was freaking amazing.
Speaker 2:I know.
Speaker 3:There's no, there is no words for that man, because he would make time for us and he would had set time aside during the week and he would sit down with us and talk with us and try to disciple us and just knowing all that he had going on to spend that time with us. There was a time I went there to go see him and I I got there early and I'll never forget this man. He was in his office and the door was open. I don't think he knew I was there, cause I came around a corner and I could hear him in there and this is the first time I've ever heard a man of God crying out to God. Yeah, and he would. I mean it wasn't just quiet. This man was. He was crying God, where are you? And I was it caught me off guard. I was like I'm walking.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:It was a moment and I'll never forget hearing him crying out to God like that, and it always amazed me that your dad was just that kind of man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so real.
Speaker 3:He lived and walked. He was doing a live video one time and God told me he speaks Bible.
Speaker 4:Have you ever opened his Bible and looked?
Speaker 3:through it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he lives it.
Speaker 1:You just hear his he just gave his first Bible to me, actually that he started his ministry with and I just he gave it to me and I was just bawling, crying I was like just what it means, you know and how many sermons were preached
Speaker 3:out of this thing. You know, but yeah, and you go through it and it's the notes lined and no, yeah, just every portion of the yeah, we took a picture of it one time, man, and it was, yeah, when I recorded, when I recorded this podcast, he was opened it up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, let me see that it's amazing yeah the picture of it, because it's just, it's a man, it's a son, yeah.
Speaker 4:it's in love with his father yeah, that, that's what that is.
Speaker 2:That's a love relationship. Yeah, there's no words for him. For sure he's amazing.
Speaker 3:There is. Even at his age he's still going hard at it, man, I always tell.
Speaker 2:God and I still tell him, if I can be, you know half the person, he is God. Then I'll have done good in this life. Then you can tell me well done you know. Just make me you know, I always tell him to find somebody that knows your dad, it could not stay.
Speaker 3:If they said that your dad did not love the Lord, they would be a liar, yeah. They're crazy If they knew your dad for any, any small amount of time and they could not say with confidence that your dad did not love God, confidence that your dad did not love God.
Speaker 2:Yep, it's evident.
Speaker 3:It's very evident that your father was just madly in love with God. That he believed it to a point of giving his life Right, that man's life was dedicated. Yep, I mean that man walked, breathed, talked Jesus, yes, in his job, in his home, at the church, with people that he met. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:And just like when Lacey did her testimony or life story, she said my parents were the same on stage as they were at home and that's exactly how my parents were.
Speaker 1:Same same genuine.
Speaker 4:I think it's part of the reason why, when the addiction entered into your life, why you kept it such a secret and so hidden Right. Because you didn't want to make dad look bad.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 4:You didn't want to, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 4:And that's just. That's honor. Yeah, that's a way to actually honor your parents, because even though what I'm doing is stupid, man, I don't want it on you, dad so right, it's just something I'll do, so I can kind of see how the enemy would use that to keep you trapped right but when you would, I mean if I would ask him now.
Speaker 2:You know he would have never wanted. It wasn't a spoken thing, where you keep things, you know you just hide things, danny, because you know we can't have any problems?
Speaker 4:no, he would never say, it was never a spoken thing. It was just that pressure that was put on you, you know.
Speaker 2:But but yeah, you just felt obligated, like you had to keep things had to be together, you know like we would always joke because we'd have the worst family fights on sunday morning before church every week.
Speaker 4:No, never fails you know yeah you and eric and the kids no, no, no no, my home life, my parents and me.
Speaker 2:You were growing up me and Jody and my mom and dad the worst fights you've ever had.
Speaker 4:Have been on Sunday morning before church before you walk in the door, you gotta put a smile on you know, everything is wonderful how are?
Speaker 1:ya, I'm good because, if an enemy can disrupt you before you get to church?
Speaker 3:maybe you won't get to church. You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean.
Speaker 3:Yep man, how many adopted kids did your parents take in?
Speaker 2:Oh goodness. Well, just my mom and dad adopted three.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But throughout my whole extended family. I mean it's like 20, I think.
Speaker 3:I only know of JoJo.
Speaker 2:JoJo.
Speaker 4:Ivanka there's.
Speaker 2:No, so well for my, just my mom and dad they adopted Charlie from Bulgaria, Jojo from Russia and then Sarah from Bulgaria. Okay, Just our family.
Speaker 3:I think we only know Jojo right? Yeah, I don't know if you guys ever met.
Speaker 4:Yeah, no, sarah, you knew Sarah but, charlie, I don't know if you've ever I think we've met Charlie he's been in has his own story, but he's been in California.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But yeah so.
Speaker 3:Amen, okay, yeah, yep. What made you guys go to Bulgaria and Russia to adopt children? So when it came to adoption, Because you guys were older, right yeah?
Speaker 1:Teens, I was like 18.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and.
Speaker 4:How'd that make you feel when they said we're gonna adopt kids?
Speaker 1:what I loved it.
Speaker 2:We loved it really yeah, we got to go with them when they went to get jojo in russia, siberia, yeah, and that was amazing, um but um you guys were happy you were getting a little brother yeah, yeah, it was, it was, it was really cool my dad always wanted, you know, always wanted a son yeah and he had two girls and my mom was done she's.
Speaker 4:I'm not going through that again yeah, so um I see how much you love jojo, and especially through social and what he means to you. And, yeah, now he's making better choices for himself he's doing how much.
Speaker 2:That's an amazing, yeah, amazing. He has an amazing testimony too.
Speaker 3:You'll have to get him on here when he around, you could tell that your dad just loved him.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Because he was always like.
Speaker 4:JoJo you know what I?
Speaker 3:mean, yeah, but what made you guys go way over there when there was kids here that could have been adopted?
Speaker 2:So a lot of the kids you would adopt here. The rights of the parents aren't severed. So with overseas adoption the rights are severed.
Speaker 4:So with overseas adoption.
Speaker 2:the rights are severed, so there's no chance that you know parents can decide when they get their stuff together that they want their kid and their life again.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So that's pretty much how it started All right. But then we got in contact with All God's Children International because of Shauna, and that's when she adopted Cooper and that's kind of what started. I love Cooper. Yeah, love that. He's special.
Speaker 4:He was shauna and that's when she she adopted cooper and that's kind of what started cooper, yeah, love that he's special, he was, he's the best.
Speaker 2:He's hilarious yeah he has the uh cooper's what's called cooper's closet. Now it's our pantry at church.
Speaker 3:Come on, man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the best really yeah, it's really cool but um, wow, he has to be monitored, of course but it but it's Cooper's closet, come on. So yeah, that's so cool yeah. Good for him, man so then that's how we got involved with August Turner International and it just kind of like trickled down, you know. Then it was my parents, of course. Sean and Jeff got theirs and then my parents, and then Jeff's mom and dad, and then my Uncle Joe and Aunt Renee adopted.
Speaker 2:And yeah, so it just kind of was like a triple effect, you know ripple effect, yeah, so God has you know, given all those kids a second shot at life, you know when many of them would be dead.
Speaker 4:Yeah, come on, we have a buddy that's from Russia too that was adopted, yeah, yeah, yeah, interesting stories from people We've got a lot of people here in this church that foster and adopt and are working with the state Wow.
Speaker 2:Yeah, nice, that's a ministry in itself.
Speaker 4:It is Our senior pastors adopted a little girl. They were in 55, 56, 55. And they went and got a little one-year-old drug exposed and now she just turned six and she's being raised in the house of god all these years with pastors and that's amazing yeah, they went and saved a life.
Speaker 3:That's awesome that's so good. So what are you doing these days, danny?
Speaker 2:so right now I've just I've been working, I've just been mom because my youngest um has some special needs challenges and I've had to kind of be available for um school stuff, behavior therapies and all kinds of stuff yeah, so just really been a stay-at-home mom. Um, that's all I've been doing um amen, that's good, eric's able to support. Yeah, yeah we're fortunate that I don't have to work but the kids are all older now, so I'm actually trying to look at some job opportunities okay um, because for me, one of my triggers is boredom so if I'm home, you know I idle time.
Speaker 3:Idle time is the devil's playground. That's absolutely how it is for me, so I'm same for me, man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, gotta stay busy so I'm looking at some different things, but yeah, I've just been staying at home. We take care of my husband's mom. She lives with us and I've nursed her through a couple surgeries. Nice man so we pretty much on the daily are doing stuff with her, taking care of her.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:And then I'm available to, of course, help with mom and dad. Now they're actually living with my sister and her husband. Now they have a casita on their land, yeah, yeah, and they live with them Okay.
Speaker 4:Because you know they're at the age where they can't take care of a house and you know all of the yard and everything.
Speaker 2:So, I'm able to kind of help there. Come on, so kind of what I've been doing so.
Speaker 3:Seeing your dad's videos, you can tell that he's he's getting up there. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:He's starting to have some things.
Speaker 3:Yes, you see that one eye that's kind of sagging a little more than the other and I'm like, oh man. But he still gets on there and does his videos man and I'm. You'll never stop, no, no, I love your dad. I hope you know that. Absolutely yeah, that dude just loved us. That's all he did. He just loved us, told us the truth, yep, and he wanted I think he wanted more for us than we were ready for. Yeah. You know, what I mean and because we were still just trying to find our way.
Speaker 3:Sure but he really wanted the best for us, man, and I'll always be grateful for our time with him. You know what I mean, because that dude taught us a lot. He showed us how to love people. He showed us how to just be light to people.
Speaker 2:Right, you know what?
Speaker 3:I mean, it's not our job to judge them.
Speaker 4:Tell them what they're doing wrong. Just love them right where they are.
Speaker 3:That's what he's telling us. Just love them where they're at you know what I mean? And just just love them. Man, that's all he would say is just love them, and god will take care of the rest. And and I honestly, danielle, I, I carry that with me every day. That's one of the things I you can ask.
Speaker 4:Rowdy, I'm not I'm the same way. I'm not even kidding. Man, don't get mad at people.
Speaker 3:People are broken people are people you just gotta love them tell them the truth and if they decide to stay one way, don't take it personal. It's not our job to save them.
Speaker 4:It's our job to tell them the truth.
Speaker 3:It's our job to be the example so they can see.
Speaker 4:Oh wait it is possible to live a different life. That's what we're called to do now, man. Our life we've been bought. We've been bought by the blood, and now our testimony is to help other people. Our struggle is so other people can. Oh, I know what that was like. I went through that, dude. Let me tell you what worked for me, bro, and now we're able to help others, this Celebrate Recovery that you guys are doing over there.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, come on sis. Tell us about that. We're trying, we're starting. Yeah, we're still very fresh. We're still, you know, trying to find people to do music and that kind of stuff.
Speaker 4:But we, you know, we've videos. We don't do live worship, we do videos.
Speaker 3:Really, yeah, only videos and here's why I'll tell you why go ahead.
Speaker 4:We went to this and nothing against celebrate music.
Speaker 3:God bless, god bless him but we went to this one and there was a female singer. Yeah and my, my struggle is sexual integrity, sexual integrity. And I spent 30 minutes.
Speaker 4:Hello, somebody Looking at this girl wearing tight pants and tight clothes. I was not worshiping.
Speaker 3:I'm going to be honest I wasn't worshiping. All I could think about was her.
Speaker 1:Her. You know what?
Speaker 3:I mean.
Speaker 4:We left there and we're talking about it and I'm like dude, we're just doing videos. I'm like I struggled that whole time, man, and he's like, wow, I'm wondering how many other men that their issue of sexual integrity had that same issue, because we were working to go to put a band together and have live worship and it was like wait, we don't need that on the stage, especially if men are going to be in that room struggling with sexual integrity.
Speaker 3:So we just do videos and I'll tell you this We've had a pastor from Sun Valley come to our Celebrate Recovery.
Speaker 4:The biggest CR in the state.
Speaker 3:And he was like man. Your guys'. Worship is powerful because it's not who's on the stage singing, it's the people who are worshiping. God and it don't matter whether it's a who's on the stage singing. It's the people who are worshiping God Absolutely, and it don't matter whether it's a video live band. If the people that are there are worshiping God. The Spirit is there.
Speaker 2:So maybe that'll help you guys.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we'll have to look at that you know what I mean, because if you guys are worshiping and there's just videos playing, the presence of God is still going to be there.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4:And uh, we'll have to try that yeah Um if you need me to come over for a testimony or a teaching or something, I can come over and help man, absolutely yeah.
Speaker 3:Don't ask me to come to teach.
Speaker 4:You'll get a 10 minute teaching. I love you, dad. Why don't you want to teach? Oh, I teach.
Speaker 3:He'll teach. Oh, I teach. So my thing is as I do the screens, I do the tech, I do the sound, the behind the scenes.
Speaker 4:I do the screens.
Speaker 3:I do all that stuff right and I love that I get to do that, but God is like cool. I want you up here, You're going to go up there. I need you up there and I'm like, but I don't want to be up there because I'm fearful of speaking in front of people and he's like but you can't grow back here man you're gonna grow up there and so I got your next lesson for you.
Speaker 4:There are times that I go up there and I do a good job.
Speaker 3:There's times I like last time. I don't know what it was about that time. It was very.
Speaker 4:He freaked himself out, man, the anxiety yeah.
Speaker 3:I'm not an anxious person, by any means. Yeah, but that day.
Speaker 4:Oh wow, I think it's because you had the day off.
Speaker 1:Maybe, and we were teaching that night, so you were thinking about it and you weren't working.
Speaker 3:A 20 minute lesson got done in 10 minutes. I literally went.
Speaker 4:I went to take attendance and I come back he's done, he's done.
Speaker 3:I'm like oh, god whoa, with minimal eye contact and it's okay, bud, there's grace.
Speaker 4:There's grace in recovery, man. But God also showed me something too and that lesson there was.
Speaker 3:You've heard of the five Ps, proper preparation prohibits poor performance. Come on, buddy, I did not prepare for my lesson, so when I got there, you've heard of the five Ps, mm-mm. Proper preparation prohibits poor performance. Come on, buddy, I did not prepare for my lesson. Hello. So when I got there, it was just literally me reading the lesson out of the handbook.
Speaker 4:Oh okay, and so there was no, thank God that CR has that available for us.
Speaker 3:Yes, of course, thank God, yeah Right.
Speaker 4:But we're to add to that, we're to put our skin on their lesson.
Speaker 3:Yeah, man, and so without me preparing ahead of time, because me and God have this thing. Okay, god, if you call me to do it, I'm just going to show up and you're going to show up and we're going to do this thing together, and so that doesn't happen every time, when it's me showing up and me doing it, God doesn't show up.
Speaker 3:That day was's me showing up and me doing it. God doesn't show up. That day was just me showing up to do it. I didn't pray, I didn't do nothing. I was just I'm gonna go do this lesson, I'm gonna do it. I'm just gonna get it done because I don't want to be up there. And that's how it happened. It was 10 minutes and yeah, yeah it was a growing moment a two hour cr lasted an hour and a half because of the short People were happy.
Speaker 4:They're like, yeah, we're getting out early, praise God.
Speaker 3:But I'm growing, he's growing man. God wants me up there for a reason. I know why it is, but I'm just.
Speaker 4:You're called to speak his word, bro.
Speaker 3:And I keep getting these dudes that are prophesying over me.
Speaker 4:I see you speaking in front of thousands of people I'm like remember the one who baptized you, bro, and so I see you speaking before men but I have to get out of my my own way.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:I have to, I have to pray, I have to be prayed up, I have to be in God's presence before I go do it. I can't just not do that. Show up and read a lesson, because that's what you're going to get. You're going to get a 10 minute lesson no eye contact, no God, no nothing in it and be out the door. Sure so for me, I have to pray.
Speaker 4:I have to be prepared. Put in some time, yeah, so it's pretty interesting man, it's good.
Speaker 3:But if you need somebody man praise God, I'll come myself for you, you and.
Speaker 2:Mike, me Mike and Eric.
Speaker 4:Amen Right now. Yeah, amen, it's good. Just us three. Yeah, it's really good. God will bring your team. What nights God will bring your team?
Speaker 2:Tuesday Well, we've been doing Tuesday nights, but we're possibly going to switch it to Thursday nights.
Speaker 3:All right, what time?
Speaker 2:We just haven't had a whole lot of interest pretty much.
Speaker 4:Are you guys on the group locator? Have you been connected with the?
Speaker 2:state rep Not yet, because you have to have so many meetings, or something like that, first.
Speaker 3:So let me give you some advice. We're coming up on our two-year anniversary, I think. Right two years, yeah Two years, february, two years, that first year, man, eight people, twelve people seven people, thirteen people what my advice to you is that CR is for you, that's for your recovery that's for Eric's recovery, that's for Mike's recovery you guys show up and do your recovery for you don't worry about the numbers, people will come eventually that's for Mike's recovery. Right, you guys show up and do your recovery For you.
Speaker 3:Don't worry about the numbers? Yep, yeah, people will come eventually, mm-hmm. But if you show up and say, hey, I'm here for my recovery and focus on that, right, don't worry about the numbers and who's coming and oh my God, we got to pick a different. Just stay focused on your recovery.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 3:And don't worry about the numbers. People start to come.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:We just had one of our biggest nights. Last night we had like 42 people. That's amazing, you know what I mean From a first year of having 8 to 12.
Speaker 4:Yes.
Speaker 3:Now here we are almost at the end of our second year, and it's starting to grow.
Speaker 4:People are bringing people. That's wonderful. Yeah, yeah, people are bringing people. That's wonderful.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so don't. The Bible says don't despise small beginnings. So don't worry about the numbers, just pick a date, stick with it.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 3:Spend the same time. Just be faithful. You'll get on the CR app. People in your area will look and find it.
Speaker 4:Sure, and before you know it, you'll be at 10 people.
Speaker 3:Before you know it, you'll be at 15 people like whoa. We need two women's small group. We need three men's small groups.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean, because that need is out there.
Speaker 4:The need is there. It's the laborers.
Speaker 3:The beautiful part is, if you go on a CR app, man, especially in the valley here where it's tight-knit, they're everywhere there's 78 of them People can go on any day of the week and find a Celebrate Recovery meeting, and I love that. Yeah, you just got to find your place your people right me I I went to sun valley. It's 120 people. I'm like this is way too big for me.
Speaker 3:I don't right, I don't like that, yeah because you can show up, go to a meeting, not talk to nobody, and get out the door and there's no accountability, right, yeah, or at our small one, it started out with you know, everybody that's there.
Speaker 4:And when they're not there. Hey, bro, missed you tonight.
Speaker 3:Dude, yeah, so when you get too big like that and praise God that they're that big, they can handle that. Me personally, I'm like I don't want to get lost. My addiction is too important. My recovery is too important to get lost in a big meeting.
Speaker 2:That's how I am too.
Speaker 3:So big meeting. That's how I am too so so just focus on your recovery.
Speaker 2:I mean, don't worry about the numbers, the numbers will come, man uh, give us an address where they can come if they want to east mesa east. Mesa elsa brown 93, 50 east brown road.
Speaker 3:Come on, you're in the east valley patch of junction area and looking for a celebrated recovery man tuesday night what time?
Speaker 2:elsa brown 6 30 tuesday night 6 30.
Speaker 3:come on, man, that's so good you guys are doing that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's um. You know it's taken taken some time and it's not easy. God knows, I've got plenty of experience and. I never knew, michael. Had you know a history like he did either?
Speaker 1:Of course.
Speaker 4:I know Eric and I did. Yeah, it was crazy.
Speaker 1:We've done church together for how many years Eric and I did? Yeah, it is crazy We've done church together for how many years?
Speaker 2:You know and yeah, so, but then once I started coming out about my problems, you know people start oh well, I you know. Yeah.
Speaker 4:It just takes one. Yeah, it just takes one.
Speaker 3:Nobody wants to be the lone guy that struggles yeah.
Speaker 1:You know what I?
Speaker 3:mean Right, and so when you open up it's like, oh yeah, somebody can relate to right.
Speaker 4:I mean, and for me, I, I love our people I love our cr people man, they're a special group and it's forever family.
Speaker 3:But but they're, they're real real man unfortunately, on sunday mornings you get a lot of masks.
Speaker 4:I'm good, I'm good. How are you People just got to church after huge fights? I'm great. Yeah, great day.
Speaker 1:God bless you. So Sunday mornings you get a lot of masks, man.
Speaker 3:Monday nights, there ain't no mask. You got people that are raw, real, and I love Jesus, but I'm struggling.
Speaker 2:That's why I really liked NA because when I was in treatment they took you to Narcotics Anonymous meetings and I loved that people were real and they were, you know.
Speaker 4:F-dominant. Oh yeah, they're just real people, straight people.
Speaker 2:I like that rawness. And when I had gone to Celebrate Recovery previous. It was a whole lot of church.
Speaker 4:And I didn't like that because you know I have a problem.
Speaker 2:I can't stop. You know I don't know when to put it down, when I pick it up. Yeah, you know and being real, and so that's why I gravitated toward narcotics anonymous, because those people are rough yeah and they're raw and they're off the streets and that's what I liked, because they were real you know I've been around plenty of stuffy church people my entire life we get we get some live language
Speaker 4:yeah, do you? Yeah? Yeah, we gotta talk about it in our small group. Open chair. There may be some cussing you might and we don't hold it against him no man right, no, and we shouldn't we let people know.
Speaker 3:You know this. Yeah, this is a Christ-centered recovery group. The main focus here is not taking the Lord's name in vain. Right, we are in recovery, you're going to hear somebody drop something Right and we're going to show you grace man. But you know and we do, we don't pull them aside and be like oh you can't, it's just a word. Yeah, it's just a word. It's just a word. Our society, right, tells us what it's so awful. Well, we've got to let the Holy Spirit change a person.
Speaker 4:That's right. It's not our job.
Speaker 3:The Holy Spirit's the one that does the work you know what I mean To call somebody out and oh, you can't be cussing at a celebrity. For the people to come in and feel that they're safe, that they can open up and be honest and drop an F-bomb and not feel like they're being condemned in a church because I dropped an F-bomb.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And we're just people and we're in recovery.
Speaker 4:We're working through some things and sometimes damn it, we're pissed off and we want to vocalize it.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And there's nothing wrong with that man.
Speaker 2:Gotta be authentic. Gotta have a safe place.
Speaker 3:It's the religious people that get mad Yep. You know what I mean. I don't think God ever got mad because somebody cussed God out.
Speaker 2:Who did he hang out with?
Speaker 3:Yeah, come on man, the tax collectors, the sinners.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the dirtbags.
Speaker 4:God would much rather have you come to him, cuss and telling them that you're pissed off.
Speaker 3:He'd be like finally, now you're getting real with me. I was going to say oh, you shouldn't talk to me like that.
Speaker 4:Oh, God, I'm going to sit you in a corner.
Speaker 3:Finally you opened up and came to me, dude.
Speaker 2:Absolutely yeah, that's how we are.
Speaker 1:I like real people that are real.
Speaker 2:That's why I gravitated towards the NA program.
Speaker 4:Amen. And if you're out there and you're watching this or listening to this, we're not saying NA or AA or CR is better than anything. You got to do what works for you. And if you need 90 meetings in 90 days, get your AA, your MA, your NA, your CA, your CR. Get them, because you know what you need in your recovery.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, I just felt like I had to say that I think most people that are in Celebrate Recovery come from other 12-step backgrounds.
Speaker 4:With higher powers.
Speaker 3:For me it was Alcoholics Anonymous. Sure, I never made it to an NA or CA or anything.
Speaker 1:It was always Alcoholics Anonymous.
Speaker 3:And I went through a lot of those in my younger years, you know what I mean, but for me I just couldn't do the doorknob right.
Speaker 4:Yeah, a tree? Well, I'm gonna cut your tree down today.
Speaker 3:I'm like it just didn't work for me you know what I mean, but I, but I went through those ones you know what I mean so man just for me recovery, just find what works for you man absolutely I don't care where you get sober where you. You get clean, just get clean and sober man you know what I mean your family needs you, people love you and they just want the best for you.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 4:I think another thing is I know, did we apologize for the body of Christ?
Speaker 1:No not yet.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:So all the man, jesus, personally, danny, just sorry. Sorry for quote unquote leadership and recovery, wherever they've been, whoever they are. Um, that the judge, and because you're, you're in working for, for your, your recovery, and for somebody to to say anything about medication and oh, you abused it and you've lost your time and it's no good.
Speaker 3:Sorry because that's not okay that's not okay.
Speaker 4:I couldn't imagine myself with some of the guys that I'm working with, that I know that I've recently encouraged them bro, go see a doctor, dude, go get the help that you need, man, so you can steady out in life. Bro. And I could not imagine telling one of those young men oh, your sobriety is no good because you're on an anti-anxiety med or you're bipolar and you're taking a med, your sobriety is shot. Now. That's wrong.
Speaker 4:And many people are in recovery for many different things. There's sexual integrity, there's grief, there's drugs and alcohol, there's codependency, there's control and anxiety. There's overeating, compulsive, I mean. There's grief. There's drugs and alcohol. There's codependency, there's control and anxiety. There's overeating, compulsive, I mean. There's a bunch of stuff so you never know where somebody's at in their walk and in their recovery. Yeah, that's why, that's why I love your dad and it's really just loving people right where they are, yep, and just letting god do what God does with them and you just be there as a shoulder and an ear and a number to just know man. So I just personally wanted to come on here and apologize for the body of Christ and any leadership that have put that pressure or that thing on you because that comes from that old school church and oh, you're not believing enough, you gotta pray harder.
Speaker 1:Where's your?
Speaker 4:faith at, and that's just not real. That's not what it is, man. Sometimes people have stuff that's off from addiction, from the crap that we put in our bodies for how long. So, man, I love you. Thank you so much for for coming on and and sharing um. What, what are you? So you? You talked about um, like where the addiction came in. You've talked about how the intervention happened, um, you talked about how, the four years and how you started to slip again. But now you're back up on the horse. You guys are working to start a CR. What is God? Because I know there's more for you. Sis, just sitting across the table from you, I can feel God ain't done with you. God ain't done with you. There's, there's some, there's some women the Lord's going to use you for, especially the younger generation, so they don't have to go through what you went through.
Speaker 1:Um and.
Speaker 4:I'm believing God's going to use the ministry to bring them to you so that you can, kind of like, mother them through their recovery. I mean it's. It's going to be beautiful, because it's always cool to be able to help others, right where our stupidity ends up being used for some good. So it's like, wow, god, you really are good, right, um, but so what are you? What are you hoping for, man?
Speaker 2:so, yeah, what are you believing? For the whole part of recovery, I, that's my pat, my, my passion is just to be able to help. I always told God that if all of the pain and trauma that I've been through with addiction just helps one person, it'll have been enough. Well, that's already happened like four times over.
Speaker 1:Come on like four times over.
Speaker 2:So that prayer God has already answered, but is just to help as many people as I can find the freedom that I have found, you know, and to just be real with people you know that addiction doesn't discriminate.
Speaker 4:You know, it happens to everybody.
Speaker 2:They don't care how old you are. You know how long you've been in church whatever, they don't care if you're a pastor's kid, it doesn't matter
Speaker 4:right.
Speaker 2:So just, really just to help anybody that I can you know, find recovery you know, to say hey, I know what it's like to not be able to stop. I know what it's like to go through a 30-day prescription in two days you know um to have seizures because you ran out of your meds, you know, whatever. So um you know.
Speaker 2:And then just the ministry for um, for addicts and alcoholics, that my husband and I will, god will just use our stories to help as many people as possible. Um, you know, I God's led me to share my story with people in the community and stuff, and um, so yeah, I just want God to really make that blossom, um, because there has to be a reason why. You know I've gone through everything you guys have gone through everything.
Speaker 2:You have you know and I think that's going to be. You know all you know. I've probably have gone through everything you have. You know, and I think that's going to be you know all you know. I've probably have gone to, like I don't know, seven detoxes, probably three treatment centers, multiple ilps. I mean, there's somebody else that can't seem to stop you know that's gone through all that so um, just forgot god to use that and um, for god to continue to.
Speaker 2:You know, bless our church and bless what god's doing with our church, your guys's church, your guys's ministries um, yeah, that's pretty much if, if there was a pastor's kid that was listening.
Speaker 3:Who is struggling? Who is? Dealing with anxiety who is dealing with something that they feel that they can't share. What would be your message to them?
Speaker 2:That everybody struggles. I mean it's just because of your name you know who your parents are. That doesn't matter. Addiction, like I said a minute ago, doesn't discriminate. And just because you're part of a pastor family doesn't mean that you don't struggle. We just get really good at hiding it.
Speaker 4:What would be their best choice to make to get out of it? Reach out Find somebody you can be honest and open with.
Speaker 2:Honest and open.
Speaker 4:God can't heal what's hidden.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we're not busy on a Monday night man.
Speaker 4:We'd love to have you. Yeah, for sure, we'd love to have you at our CR.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely, you can come and check out, kind of how we do things man. That'd be awesome. I'd love that. Maybe you get some cool ideas. Six, six At six, we start we feed Food. Yeah, next week is testimony night, so we're going to be feeding.
Speaker 4:I got a good testimony coming in too Carrie, Carrie's guys oh yeah, they're really good.
Speaker 3:Okay, nice Recovery, awesome. Yeah, if you ever, you know I'm going to schedule her.
Speaker 4:Well, I was talking to her and she's like that, she's writing it out for a CR. Come on man. Yeah, that's what I was doing.
Speaker 3:Once you're getting it written out.
Speaker 4:I'll schedule you and you can come in for one of our testimony nights and share your testimony.
Speaker 3:That would be great. I'd love that. I would love that. Bring your husband with you. Man, we'd love to see him.
Speaker 2:I'll have to do that, but it's like you, discount, because I've been a Christian my whole life, you know.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:What's so great about my story? I've been a Christian my whole life. You know you're not that person that was, you know, strung out or whatever you know, but it's. Everybody's stories is relatable to somebody else.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, so we got this buddy, jim man, he's special.
Speaker 4:He is man. He's literally in his 70s, 60s, 70s in his 60s and he's been in the church his whole life faithfully serve.
Speaker 3:God's never smoked, never drank, don't cuss, don't just. None of the just been faithful to god his entire life. God's been faithful to him his entire life.
Speaker 4:An architect and he lives a good life. He's a blessed man.
Speaker 3:He's always. I don't have a story. I'm like what are you talking about, dude? You got the best story there is His kids serve God.
Speaker 4:His grandkids are in the house. Your entire life that's wonderful.
Speaker 1:Wow, all over him, I'm like for someone like me.
Speaker 3:I hear your story and I'm like yes, that's what I mean, and he's like but I don't have you. I'm like nobody wants my story.
Speaker 4:Why do you want my story? You want to go through that hell I'm like. I'd much rather have your story.
Speaker 2:That's how you view it. You think it's more powerful, jeez.
Speaker 3:You know and it's not man it's a lot more headaches. I'm more sleepy. The father of faith come on you have david's story the man who fell all murder. All you have these two wonderful stories. They're totally different stories. Would you rather have abraham's or david's? I mean, I'd much rather have, yeah, yeah you know what I mean, but they're both in the bible, right. They're both there for a reason. They both need to be told, right? You know what I mean, because someone like me is going to hear jim's story and be like that's my god, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3:And people are gonna hear my story and be like that's my God, you know what I mean. And people are going to hear my story and be like, damn, that's my God.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. God can bring you through that, so they're both needed.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely For sure. Thanks, man. Thank you for having me. It was good to see you again, man. You too, really good to see you guys.
Speaker 3:It's exciting a we don't really know what we're doing. If anybody says a servant God is boring, they're not, they're not.
Speaker 2:No, right, they're not. Yeah, my dad always says that, right, yeah, it's never a dull moment, man it's real.
Speaker 3:I mean especially like me and Rowdy. We're pretty. I don't know we're pretty out there, is that what you want to call it? But we're the God bless you. Jesus loves you. And he went to go pick up this picture frame for his bachelor's degree. He's got a bachelor's in theology now.
Speaker 2:Oh gosh, Congratulations. We went to go pick up his picture frame.
Speaker 3:And the kid's like, oh, I've got to walk you up front. And we're like, cool, let's go. And we start walking. He's like, what are you guys doing tonight? And we're like, oh, what's that? Oh, it's a. You know, we start talking to this kid about it. And we get to the counter and we see this lady beelining for us all the way over. She's like I know about celebrity recovery my son and we start telling us about her son who's in recovery.
Speaker 4:Yeah, 70 days and right there in Hobby Lobby man we tell her can I pray for you? I want to pray for your son.
Speaker 3:And a cashier lady who's just she's like let's pray right now.
Speaker 4:I was like, oh right, in the hobby lobby, the four of us are praying for this lady's son and she's bawling.
Speaker 3:And all it started was just being real and open and talking about what we're doing and celebrate recovery, and you know that to me that's exciting yeah absolutely. There you are in public and you're praying and talking about God and celebrating recovery and what God's done. That's amazing.
Speaker 2:That's not boring. No, it's not, if you find that boring.
Speaker 1:God help you. What kind of person are you?
Speaker 2:Yeah you know what I mean, but it's definitely not a boring life. No, it's not.
Speaker 3:I'd much rather have this life than that.
Speaker 4:Amen Amen.
Speaker 3:I wake up and know where I'm at.
Speaker 4:Oh yeah, just the fact that I get to wake up, that means I went to sleep.
Speaker 2:Remember what you did last night.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:You or me, I'll pray.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'll pray for you. Alright, get it, bro. Thanks again, sis man, thank you. Such an honor man. Thank you.
Speaker 4:God, I thank you so much For Sister Danny man. Yeah, man, I thank you so much for Sister Danny man. I thank you for Eric, god. Thank you for Romans 12, lord, thank you for Papa Bill, god, thank you for what you've done in her life. Thank you for the example she is to many, god, now, thank you that she is a woman of influence. Thank you, lord, she is a woman with experience. Thank you, lord, god, she's been through some things and you've walked her through it and now, god, she's ready to help others through their stuff. Thank you, lord. So I thank you for Romans 12 and the CR ministry. God, that they're starting, because out there in East Mesa, god, the need is real. Thank you, lord. So I thank you, god, that first, that CR is just going to be for them, god, and you're going to build their team, you're going to really strengthen their team, and then you're going to bring the people. So, god, I just thank you for what you're doing. Lord.
Speaker 4:When Danny was talking about just the future, god, I just saw her writing, writing a book and setting down and putting these words into paper and onto a computer. Um, so, lord, I just, if there has ever been an inkling to write and to share. Um, god, I pray that this is just confirmation for her to know that I want to use your experience for my glory and I thank you. You're going to bring finances into the home through the book. Um, so, god, I just pray that your will be done in her life. Um, I thank you that brayden is in in your hands, hayley is in your hands, austin is in your hands. God, she's done well. I hear you saying you've done well with my kids. Thank you, lord.
Speaker 4:So, lord, I just pray for just a great finish to 24. But, Lord, I thank you for what you're going to do in 25. Because there is increase, there is souls, there is multiplication in the ministry. God's not done so. Lord, I thank you that the relapse was part of her recovery, because there's going to be people that are going to come in God, that are going to go through and experience the same things. So I just pray, lord, that you use this testimony like only you can Encourage your people and bring some salvation or some recovery through it For whoever's going to listen or whoever's going to watch. We ask that in Jesus' name, amen, amen, danny, can you do us a favor and pray for Speak Life AZ and pray for me and Dad and just whatever God's doing with this thing. Yeah, lord, thank you Jesus.
Speaker 4:Thank you, lord, god for Lord, life az and pray for me and dad and just absolutely whatever god's doing with this thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, lord, thank you jesus for. Thank you, lord god for lord rowdy jesus, and thank you, lord jesus, for eddie god. Thank you, lord, for their ministry, jesus, that they have started. God have been working on god. I just ask, lord god, that you will multiply, multiply, lord, all of their efforts. God, multiply Jesus. I pray and bring finances, lord, where finances are needed. God.
Speaker 2:Thank you, God and I just ask that you will bless them and keep them and strengthen them, lord, god, as they do what you want them to do, father, and speak to people that you want them to speak to Jesus. Thank you, lord. I thank you, lord, god, for what they're doing. I thank you, lord, god, for what they're doing. I thank you for the ministry. I thank you, lord, for the people's lives that have been touched. Father, through their efforts. God, I just ask for your blessing, lord, god, over them and over their families. God and over their church, lord, and over their ministry. God, we give it to you, lord, god, and we thank you, father, for all that you're going to do with it. Lord, god, beyond, lord, what we could ever dream or imagine, god, or think. Father, thank you, god, we put it in your hands In your name, jesus, amen.
Speaker 4:Amen, man, everybody. Well, first, dani, I just want to say thank you again. Thank you for having me. It's truly an honor to have you, sis, Thank you, appreciate you guys, everybody out there. Man, I don't know where you're listening to us or watching us from, but if you could please subscribe to the channel and go on and leave a comment, even if you just type one word Jesus, I'm leaving the comments on. It really helps with the algorithms and stuff. If you yourself want to come on Speak Life AZ and share your testimony on the podcast, you can reach out through social media Speak Life AZ, all one word Instagram, twitter, uh, facebook, um, but until the next time, man, we're going to continue to speak life AZ. God bless you. You guys get your music.