SpeakLifeAZ
The testimony of Jesus in, with, and through everyday people like us. A father and son who were addicts for over 20 yrs. You name it, WE DID IT, TOGETHER!!!! we used to use drugs together now we share about what God Has done for us to encourage the body of Christ and anyone else who may listen to this that is feeling hopeless and empty. LISTEN TO OUR STORY...and the testimony of others who feel led to share with you.... GOD BLESS YOU....TODAY WE CHOOSE TO SPEAK LIFE AZ!!!!!!!!!!
SpeakLifeAZ
Starr G. Testimony
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When life's foundation feels shaky, where do you find stability? In this deeply moving episode, we're joined by Starr, whose journey from military child to prayer warrior reveals the hidden strength that holds up a community of faith.
Born into a Catholic military family that moved constantly, Starr's early experiences shaped her resilience and adaptability. Yet it was her mother's genuine love for Jesus—beyond mere religious tradition—that planted seeds for Starr's own spiritual journey. As a teenager in the 1970s, Starr encountered the charismatic movement that would forever transform her relationship with God, receiving the baptism of the Holy Spirit and discovering the power of hearing God's voice directly.
The core of Starr's testimony centers around how God met her in life's darkest valleys. After losing her 19-year-old son Matthew in 2001, she experienced a supernatural peace that defied explanation when God prompted her to worship in the midst of grief. Years later, when her grandson lived only 30 hours, she learned that God sometimes works differently in similar situations—teaching her that faith isn't about avoiding suffering but experiencing God's presence within it.
What makes this conversation especially powerful is Starr's vulnerability about the questions that arise when prayers seem unanswered. Her honest wrestling with God through loss offers profound insight into the "baptism of suffering" that Jesus himself referenced—and how such suffering ultimately transforms us to look more like Him.
Whether you're facing your own dark valley or simply seeking to deepen your faith, Starr's journey demonstrates how becoming a "pillar" in God's house often happens behind the scenes, holding up others through prayer and speaking life when they need it most. Her testimony reminds us that true strength isn't always visible but is essential to everything standing.
All right, everybody. Welcome back to the Speak Life AZ podcast testimony of Jesus and everyday people. I'm your host, eddie, and always with me is my son Rowdy.
Speaker 2Jesus. What up, dude, dude? Did you say Eddie-a?
Speaker 1I have no idea bro, it came out a little weird. I felt it. Yeah, I was like whoa, that was a little different. My mind was ahead of my mouth.
Speaker 2It's okay, buddy, how you doing? Man, I'm getting old, obviously. Hey, what did we do last night, bud, we got a blue chip bud. Denial getting old, I love you, man.
Speaker 3Well, it was funny, because last night I was hosting CR and we had a service chip and on the back is a great verse, so I pull it out to read it and I'm like, oh my God, I can't read it, so I had to have somebody else.
Speaker 1that was up there handing out chips. Read it for me and I was like dang dude. And I have reader glasses and I should carry them with me all the time.
Speaker 1Hello, come on, buddy. I'm not quite old enough to want to be old, but I'm not young enough that I am old God is good dude. Well, yeah, it is what it is amen bro a good day there's grace and recovery, but of course that was a really good day, man. We were hammered bro and just busy, and I love that man feeling good, so does my heart my heart loves when I work dude.
Speaker 2It sure does, but the body in motion stays in motion yeah, when I sit around and get lazy man, my heart not good. No blood pressure and all that stuff, yeah, yeah, when I'm working on busting my butt, dude.
Speaker 1I have the best blood pressure ever feel good, that's good, yeah, so I need to start getting up on weekends and moving. Come on, buddy, let's go. Dude, how about you? How was your day?
Speaker 2oh, it was great man. Yeah, I'm over at. Uh, you know our brothers watching kitty cats yeah man, it's great, the cats are crazy dude. That's awesome, but it's just, it's uh. When you're not in your own bed and you're not in your own house with your own stuff, it's a little.
Speaker 1It's a little different.
Speaker 2Yeah, but it's all worth it, man. Amen. My buddy's out with his family enjoying his vacay for the week.
Speaker 1Nice to be somebody that people can trust.
Speaker 2Huh Dude I literally used to rob houses bud.
Speaker 3Now people are asking you to come and watch them. Now you're babysitting them.
Speaker 2Only God can do that, people. I'm excited about this one, bro. Yeah, this is going to be great dude, you got one of.
Speaker 1God's anointed.
Speaker 2Man, I can't wait. Sister Star, what's up?
Speaker 4Hi guys, you mighty men of God.
Speaker 1How you doing, sis, I'm really great, thank you. God made it very clear to us man, especially when we started doing video, to when we get one of his children on to honor them, because one commodity we don't get more of in life is time. We're limited to what we have on this earth and when someone shares that with us to come share their story, it's an honor. It has great value to me personally to know that someone would share a little bit of their time with us, uh, to tell their God story. And for that, man, we honor you and we thank you and, uh, I'm excited.
Speaker 2Yeah, for, for for me, star, it's um, we, we get a lot there's there's. People are different and not everybody is at a place where they can come into a platform like this and share their story. Because a lot of times, man, we've got stuff and in CR we call it hurts, habits and hangups, and it's the stuff we have to heal from and part of the healing is literally talking about it and looking at it. But a lot of times the trauma and stuff we'd suppress it, push it down and move on in life and we never deal with it but do you really move on in?
Speaker 2life no, you don't, but it's still there. Poisons us from the inside my friend?
Speaker 1we don't know it, but we respond with bitterness and things like that when we're still hurt and dealt with it but so god but praise god. We're all different because, god, that would be boring, dude. If I had to sit in a room with 20 of me's, I'd be like Jesus.
Speaker 2Lord.
Speaker 1I love you Dad.
Speaker 2But for me, star, I'm stoked about this man because of just who you are, sister, and for my time here at LifeLink Church, the things that I have seen you do and the things that you are a part of and the influence you have in the tribe sisterhood, the influence you have in the prayer ministry, the influence you have with our senior pastors and the way that you pray for them and you're an intercessor for them. You are somebody here in this house, sister, that is making a kingdom impact and it's all God, of course, sister. But I've got to come along with the ride with you in a few of these different areas and it's really beautiful. I remember when I first showed up, it was me, you, your mama and Jeannie, and we'd be over there in the room and pastor would come and we'd sit them down and we'd start lighting them up for prayer man.
Speaker 2You know that was a great seat, but it was. It was truly an honor to be a part of that. I'm like wow, there's 600 people that are coming to LifeLink and there's four of us man that are getting here an hour early to pray for the room and pray for the, so when he comes in, holy fire can rain down on our pastor so he can go and do it. It's just, it's truly beautiful man.
Speaker 4That was great time with you too, there.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 4So important having you there.
Speaker 1God just showed me a picture. So you have this beautiful house right and it's like on this uneven surface. So there's these pillars that help hold the house up. But when people come see the house, they revel at the beauty of the house and they don't they don't ever pay attention to the pillar, pillars, that's holding the house up that's good, dad. God said you were a pillar come on, so you're not on stage, you're not in worship or band.
Speaker 1Nobody really not in a church. You're not in a church, you're not in worship or band. Nobody really sees star.
Speaker 2That's right. You know what I mean, that's right.
Speaker 1Except for those who know you. We know who you are, but to those who show up on a given Sunday, they will never really know that there's this pillar called star, that's holding up the body of lifelink and prayer and stuff like that. God says you're a pillar.
Speaker 2It's really good. Thank you, father, for that. Let me just pray real quick and then we'll kind of get into this thing. Jesus, thank you, lord, man, Holy Spirit, thank you, god. Thank you, god. Thank you for what you're getting ready to do, jesus. Thank you, lord. Thank you that you are here. God, I thank you for your daughter, star. I thank you, god, for all that she does and all that she is. I thank you, lord, for just how you made her.
Speaker 2God, I pray right now in the name of Jesus, just for her specifically. If there's any nerves or anxiety, just fall away, god. I thank you that this is a safe place, lord. Thank you, lord. I thank you, jesus, that Holy Spirit, you're here. You're getting ready to share and you're getting ready to use her words to speak to your people. You're getting ready to encourage your people. You're getting ready, god, I can see literally spirits are going to be lifted, People are going to listen to this and they're going to be able to relate in ways with you, god. So I thank you for all that you're going to do in this, in Jesus' mighty name. Amen, amen, man Star, that was great.
Speaker 1I just saw demons trembling.
Speaker 4They're like, oh God, let's get ready to start.
Speaker 2Hold on here, sister. A lot of people know your husband, true. A lot of people know Al For sure, but very few actually know Star. Yeah, I like it that way. Well, it's going to be cool. People are going to be able to watch this, because we got a lot of lifelinkers who are faithful and love this thing man, and some of them call it a good book. Who are faithful and love this thing, man, and some of them call it a good book. I'm like this is great. I don't know what you're doing, god, just have your way, lord.
Speaker 1We've literally had people connect because of one of our episodes.
Speaker 2Come on, buddy.
Speaker 1And two sisters in Christ that didn't know each other's story but listened and connected.
Speaker 2Because they had something similar.
Speaker 1And they actually I don't know if they ever really they said they were going to do a live group together. I don't know if they ever really did or not yet, but stuff like that happens.
Speaker 2They're connected. I'm not surprised.
Speaker 1Relationships are happening, so there's going to be women at our church that are going to listen? Who?
Speaker 2think they know you.
Speaker 1Come on and they're going to be like. I had no idea. That's right, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2So don Do it, God Do it. But so basically, man, when God gave this to us during COVID in 2020, we didn't do what we were supposed to do. You know, we like to run, we're runners, man. We run ahead of God and he's like dude come back here, son. We sat up in my bedroom and we're doing videos and Facebook, preaching and all this stuff. Man, it's like, nope, that's not what it was the crazy part is.
Speaker 1it was actually pretty good and people were actually watching. But, it was not what God told us to do. And so after, like the second or third one, it was a fight.
Speaker 2It was a battle. It was a battle, man. So it was the beginning of 2023. What was that? Three years when we finally were like dude, what is this? And he told me Speak.
Speaker 2Life AZ Podcast the testimony of Jesus in everyday people. It doesn't matter if you're like Dad and you're over at the shop and welding and cutting on metal and working on cars, or myself and you're here at the church and you're setting up baptisms and cleaning bathrooms and windows and floors, or like yourself, man, um. We all are everyday people and we all have a testimony. We all have a story, um. So basically, we just want to know who star is, we want to know what, where you were born, what life was like growing up, brothers and sisters, mom and dad, um school, how was school for you? What were the grades, sports, um. But I think, because me and dad, man.
Speaker 1Usually we ask if god was in the home.
Speaker 2But we know yes, this is going to be a story of god's faithfulness, just so you know um but just who you are, man and how you grew up and working in recovery.
Growing Up in a Military Family
Speaker 2We know the hurts, the habits, the hangups and all the stuff that messes with us later in life. A lot of times it comes from childhood hurts and traumas and things like that, and me knowing you, sis, and kind of a little bit of who you are, but I don't know where you got this fire for prayer and you know what I mean. Just a, really. So I'm excited to get to know this with you and your faith, um, but just uh, I think the coolest thing we really want to get today is your encounter with Jesus. Um, because dad encountered Jesus in a prison yard in Tucson, mine was at a rehab and teen challenge at 1515 West Grand.
Speaker 2We want to know where God got you and he became so real and it was your faith. It wasn't mama's and dad's faith or brother's, it became my. This is my God. So in some people it happens in a day, other people it happens over a series of encounters, a series of moments with God. So we just want to know what your encounter with God looked like, to where your faith became real and then afterwards, man, because anytime you have a real encounter with Jesus. It leads to life change. Things change, man. It's about transformation. The stuff before Christ doesn't please and satisfy the way it does after, and so we just want to know kind of what the life change was after the encounter with God. But then, at the very end, we want to know what you're hoping for, sis, and believe in God for, because you're still young, you've still got life ahead of you, man, and God has more for you.
Speaker 1And we know you and your husband are in this new season Come on. I know he's told me a little bit about what you guys are doing, so I know you guys are doing something, but we want to know, so we can pray and our listeners can pray and we're going to watch God move.
Speaker 2I feel like a person's influence on the earth. Their greatest influence is between 50 and 70. Wow, so those are the 20 years where a person can really make the biggest impact. So I just believe, sister, that God wants you to know that there is more for you ahead. There's more women that are going to be able to receive from you. There's more.
Speaker 1So, yeah, this is going to be great, dude. You know what I love about us asking you to share your encounter is it really shows how personal God is. I know, you know, because if all our encounters were the same and it would just be this one God, what's one like image of God where we get to see him?
Speaker 1The God in a box, Multiple different facets of how he's in Teen Challenge, how he's in prison, how he's in the home. You know what I mean. It's just I don't know. The last few ones we've done, God's really highlighted that.
Speaker 3You're showing people that.
Speaker 1I'm this personal God, I'm not just some big God.
Speaker 3I've literally come to a point where me and you are having a personal and I love that dude, I really do.
Speaker 1I'm sorry, I had to share that, because I love that. That God is that personal, that he knows where to reach us in our moments and knows the timing, everything about it. Yeah, he does. He's good so what was it like growing up, star friend.
Speaker 4Well, so y'all must know, my mother is Mexican, my father's a good old boy from tennessee, so they met when my dad was stationed in el paso and there used to be an air force base there. It's now. It's fort bliss, it's an army base yeah, he's an army guy.
Speaker 3We love our military period um.
Speaker 4So my dad and mom met and they dated for a year or so and then she was Catholic. He was raised um Baptist, I think, so she wasn't going to marry him unless he changed, converted.
Speaker 3Oh wow, oh wow.
Speaker 4And so, uh, he did that. He, he loved her so much that he decided this is worth it yeah.
Speaker 2So um men will do a lot of things for a woman.
Speaker 4I have to tell you one really funny part yeah of this story is that, prior to that, my mother's father mexican yeah in um different parts of mexico he fought with pono Villa's army.
Speaker 3Really, oh wow.
Speaker 4So he and another brother, there were five boys, I believe. They fought with Pancho Villa, who was like the I think they call it the. A liberator, he was a liberator and it's kind of like he was the oh, now I can't think of the guy's name, the folklore guy, but anyway he.
Speaker 1Billy the Kid.
Speaker 4Way back in medieval times Sorry. Anyway, sorry.
Speaker 3Robin Hood. He was the Robin Hood. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4But two of his other brothers fought against Pancho Villa's army whenever they would kind of meet up. Thankfully they never met up the brothers.
Speaker 3Really.
Speaker 4Wow. But when her dad, my mom's dad, was 36 and on his horse, he sees this 16-year old girl by the river in mexico washing clothes, and he decides I want that and he took her. Wow, so that's how my mom's parents got together totally different times.
Speaker 1Yeah, it was way different times different times different way to do stuff.
Speaker 4Maybe back then it was a little bit more like, okay, this is how it's done.
Speaker 1The moment that we were telling you about that we had with your mom and dad at the alleys. They told us their story a little bit like that.
Speaker 4I was like, oh, that's great. It was so funny, so you can imagine the things we've had to pray off, but anyway, but so they marry. And then my dad. It's really cute to hear their story. He had already gotten out of the Army I'm sorry, air Force and he was thinking that he was going to be able to get a job right there locally in El Paso.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And my mom. You know, all her relatives are in Juarez.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And I don't know. Like a week or whatever it is goes by and nothing.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And so he just goes right back to the Air Force recruiting office and he signs back up. He gets this huge bonus. Check. Next thing I know my dad's walking in with a big couple bags of groceries and it's like okay, honey, I got a job, I'm back in the Air Force. Oh wow, and they instantly assign him to go to Orlando Air Force Base in Florida.
Speaker 3Oh, wow, okay.
Speaker 4So that's where I was born.
Speaker 1Okay, in Florida, oh wow.
Speaker 4Okay, so that's where I was born.
Speaker 1Oh, okay, so a year later, I'm born in Orlando Are you the oldest. I'm the oldest, are you?
Speaker 4Oh, and then I have five younger brothers.
Speaker 3Oh, wow, wow.
Speaker 4So they live there two years I'm the oldest. Then, a year later, my brother Troy's born.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And six out of eight of us were actually born in july, so I'm july 26 choice july 7th. A year later, my brother, scott, is born, but not in florida. Now they've moved back to el paso because my dad is reassigned on a remote assignment yeah, and I think it was to thailand.
Speaker 2I think it was some thailand so you go where they tell you to go, exactly, sign your, sign your name up.
Speaker 4Yeah, so we were a typical military family, you know, and this is what my mom has got to get used to, and she does pretty good, and she had studied to be a nurse before she met my dad, and that's a whole story in itself. So, you'll have to hear that another time.
Speaker 2Oh, that's why a lot of the brothers have gone through, or in the health or medical. Oh, okay the time. Oh, that's why a lot of the brothers have gone through, or in the health or medical. Okay, she's a huge inspiration. That way we're supposed to have your mom on.
Speaker 4So stay tuned. Yeah, we're gonna have that story, guys. You can hear it. It's the best.
Speaker 1So, um, so then she spends, you know, the year with me, uh, troy scott your dad moved you guys all back to El Paso so she could be by her family. Yes exactly and work while.
Speaker 2Oh, so he got reassigned, but you guys all went there, correct, because it was a remote assignment where you can't take your family.
Speaker 4It's in Thailand. There are places like that.
Speaker 2It's because they don't have the bases, the facilities and the housing to support the families.
Speaker 4And my dad was doing. He was in communications in the military so he would put telephone lines. Intelligence Communications as in like literal telephone lines and stuff for housing. And he told me about the officers he would put housing in or communications in.
Speaker 3So it was really it was a cool job for him.
Speaker 4So then, but my mom was pregnant with Scott, had Scott, and I don't even think my dad made it back in time for Scott when Scott was born. Oh wow, because he had to catch one of those big.
Speaker 3C-5s or whatever they were.
Speaker 2KC-135, and fly back. Catch a flight across the ocean Exactly.
Speaker 4Exactly so. Then, after that one year remote assignment, then we moved to Washington State and so there was three kids in three years, skip a year. And then my brother um no, yeah, my brother, steve, is born we got to meet him in Washington State if you don't, if you don't mind, sister, when were you born? So I was born in 1960, okay, okay, all right 1961 Scott 1962 skip a year, uh go to live in Washington State and Steve is born.
Speaker 2Steve, I love you bud If you watch this we're going to have to get together watch some games. I need to eat some more of that food, bro. He's amazing.
Speaker 1He was the only one of your brothers. I haven't well, troy, of course, but Steve was the only one that I have not met.
Speaker 2No, scott, you ain't met Scott, I met Scott, I met Scott.
Speaker 1I used to play softball with Scott, oh wait no, who's the one in Florida?
Speaker 4Well, Troy is now in heaven, if you're thinking of who was born in Florida.
Speaker 1Okay, I knew Troy was gone, but Steve was the only one that was alive that I haven't met, and I got to meet him the other day. Yeah, because Sean and Jim are here. Yeah, yes, he played softball with Scott. He'd been a pitcher. That's so cool.
Speaker 4Okay, so then Steve was born and then the next year Jim.
Speaker 1Yeah, security here, yeah, yeah, yeah, my man, yeah, beautiful wife Christy is in choir, yeah, and then actually my mom got pregnant. All your brothers are in the house of God.
Speaker 2It's beautiful to see your whole family.
Speaker 4Various times.
Speaker 3Yes.
Speaker 2Well, they're just not here, Correct, but they're in different and they're serving God.
Speaker 1Correct, they're singers, they're pastors. We actually heard about your brother and Chris Peterson's testimony.
Speaker 4Yeah, which one? Scott, scott, scott.
Speaker 1Oh nice, Scott was his youth pastor.
Speaker 2Oh, is that what it was.
Speaker 4I thought it was the worship. Maybe it was worship. Was it here or when we were at?
Speaker 1living word bible church. Uh, so maybe a couple decades before before life link, you guys were at a church that's where the petersons were at, yeah, and then mike and k scott moved to the life link and scott chris peterson came with him because he's like I'm going where you're going right because chong yes yeah, it was crazy.
Speaker 2I was like whoa small world it really is.
Speaker 4Yes, wasn't his youth, yeah, yeah so it's fun to run into our old family church family yeah so um I love that, that our community is so connected like that.
Speaker 2Yeah, like brother matt, I had no idea that in the 80s y'all were hanging out together. I'm like this is nuts, dude. He's like a part of your family, dude, totally. He gets invited to the birthdays and I'm like y'all love if the briskets bro. I love you, matt, if you watch this bro.
Speaker 4He just did that saturday for my brother jim's birthday. So yeah, it was really awesome.
Speaker 2Come on, man, that's family. I know we're so blessed.
Speaker 4It just keeps expanding, amen. So after my mom had Steve and Jim, she actually got pregnant again with another boy, but she miscarried at five months, okay, yeah, yeah. But because of that.
Speaker 1Did she name him?
Speaker 4You know what? I can't remember if my parents named him. That's a great question. Maybe she'll remember. Yeah, that's a great question.
Speaker 2That's something we can ask her man yeah.
Speaker 4And then so the span between Jim and my youngest brother, sean, who was also at this church ushering.
Speaker 1I love that guy.
Speaker 4Thank you and his beautiful wife, madeline, yeah. He always gives me hugs and says yeah, I love sean bro, yeah, yeah great usher, so thankful for all of them yeah, well, he was born four years after jim, and it was when we moved to turkey oh, wow my dad, you guys lived over there years in turkey.
Speaker 2Wow, when was this? The?
Speaker 380s, we moved there in 1969 jesus so you were a little kid.
Speaker 4Nine and ten and in fact so again all these july birthdays. My mom I don't know if she was already pregnant with sean when we moved there, but sean was born july 16th 1969. That's when the astronauts took off for the moon.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And then they landed on. July 20th, my mom's birthday, so of 69. So for those of you that don't believe the moon landing happened, it really did this guy's a flat earther, flat earther I love you.
Speaker 2Dad.
Speaker 4I don't think that the yeah those altitudes and latitudes and longitudes would work for pilots if you didn't. If it was flat earth, but anyway, I'm just teasing, but yeah, we lived in Turkey for two years.
Catholic Upbringing and Spiritual Hunger
Speaker 2Okay, so up until this point it sounds to me like military bases. You're in the military schools. There's's a lot of structure, a lot of good family yeah good, great, great family, but it's military living correct um were you guys doing? Church we were catholic church because my mom was mexican so we're on the base good catholics wherever the churches were okay, yeah, okay, and we love being catholic actually we were all good catholics because we were all good catholics because, we go to church all the time.
Speaker 4My brothers, when they got older they were altar boys oh wow.
Speaker 2So you guys like were christened and had the communions and were like legit, legit, okay and but my mother modeled for us a love for the lord she totally modeled it.
Speaker 4You know she was a good catholic but she was a really good lover of j.
Speaker 2When you say that, are you talking about away from church? Yes, away from church and in church.
Speaker 4And you know, of course, the Catholic Church. There's a lot of things I love about it. We're no longer Catholic, we're just spirit-filled non-denominational.
Speaker 3Shut up, which we'll talk about shortly.
Speaker 4But what I love about being raised in the Catholic church was there's several things that they're so good at Tradition.
Speaker 2They've got some stuff that's beautiful to be a part of.
Speaker 4One huge thing is you realize you do sin. It's not just a greasy grace.
Speaker 2You're always going to get skidding by. Amen.
Speaker 4The grace of Jesus is like no, you have sinned, so you need to repent.
Speaker 2Yeah, amen, repent, confess, right, that's huge, come on. And then also, I'm getting emotional right now. I don't know why I'm like gee God, yes, we need all of that.
Speaker 1Repentance does that buddy? Amen, bro, I saved. He's the one gonna be transformed. Thank you, dad.
Speaker 3Let it go, holy spirit. I love it.
Speaker 1I love that you said your mom modeled for come on, man, because we've had we always and my life. We kind of knew already but we get a lot of people who who were raised in church grew up in it had to do it, but that's what dad did. But sure it was a wed night, saturday night, sunday morning, kind of thing.
Speaker 2It was when we were at church. Correct, that's when we did church, but at home, at home, there was no.
Speaker 1Yeah, there was no discussion of godly things, there was no prayer time, there was no let's read Get close to Jesus. I don't remember that, so it was just this format of we go to church, not we live this way we live with God. So when you say your mom modeled that for you, it was different than what people think.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 1You know what I?
Speaker 4mean Exactly, and thank you for asking about that, because I think that's so important. It is, it's huge she was still Catholic but, she was also really in love with Jesus.
Speaker 2We've had people on that were very devout and strong Catholics. Never opened their Bible.
Speaker 4Exactly.
Speaker 2It was just something that was up there, but they don't remember reading the Bible. I'm like wow, so there is other stuff. But when you say model, so that means Mama was at home and she was reading her Bible.
Speaker 4And I don't remember how many times I probably saw her read her Bible, but she just modeled like a love for. God and hungry for God, making us aware that there's more than just living this earth and my dad. He was definitely a Christian, but it was Mom, that was just more of the. So when we had this conversation, I asked your dad. You know it was mom, that was just more of the.
Speaker 1So when we had this conversation with you, yeah, I asked your dad, you know oh yeah he was honest and I and I appreciate his honesty. Man, you know, I mean love you jim, and uh so, but I'm not going to tell his story, but we kind of know how his yes, his story went a little bit, you know, yeah, yeah yeah, and so what was?
Speaker 1turkey like as a 10 year old military living is hard oh yeah, it can be, we've had a couple people who were military people and being in the military it's built you're no friends that you grew up with.
Speaker 2You're missing all the.
Speaker 4You're nailing it because I thankfully I'm not like an extra extrovert, but I'm, I don't mind, I love people I love being around people.
Speaker 2I love starting conversations with people a little easier for you to meet new people and so it was easy for four of us but two, I would say very introvert yeah, excuse me, your brothers and your brothers, two of my brothers are very introverted and so starting over every two years with new friendships and all was hard.
Speaker 2Yeah, and you could see it you could see it on them and just so you know, the military, the duty stations last about two years. There's a couple around the world that are three-year tours, but that's why you're constantly getting stationed new places starting over, because it's a constant reassignment.
Speaker 4Exactly, yeah, and so I probably just wasn't very aware of my life being a little different than all the other military kids. But if we went off base or if we were around family some of the family's relatives in Tennessee when we'd go back there or Mexico, of course our life is different from theirs, but for the most part it just felt like it was pretty normal. Pretty normal. And when we lived in Turkey my parents made a point especially, I think, my mom of us going to Ephesus, which would be part of our Turkey trip. So I've been in the ruins of Ephesus probably seven, eight times.
Speaker 4now it's incredible, so I remember it as a nine-year-old girl seeing it and when we went back for in 20.
Speaker 1Did you know what you were looking at?
Speaker 4Well, my mom was saying this is where you know.
Speaker 3this was holy, it was you know what you were look would you know what you were looking at?
Speaker 4my mom was saying this is where you know this was holy. Yeah, you know part of wow. She might have said it was part of the catholic church back then, but the whole point was, it was part of christianity.
Speaker 2Are you allowed to have cameras in these areas when we go? Oh yeah, so like I can have a gopro with. Oh dude, I need to work on that before we go. Bud, I want to have videos of all this stuff bro.
Speaker 3You got this nice phone with lots of storage space bud.
Speaker 1I love you dad. Well, that helps too.
Speaker 2It's easier to carry around.
Speaker 4But, honestly, when I went back again in 2010 on a trip with Joy Wright, pastor Dave's mom, I could tell just my child's mind remembered oh wow, this has changed so much.
Speaker 1That's the one where she hurt her leg.
Speaker 4No.
Speaker 1I wasn't on that trip, that was, both of her boys were on that trip.
Speaker 3Pastor Dave and Dr Drew.
Speaker 1But she but, yes.
Speaker 2I was so thankful to go on that trip with her and his an in-law.
Speaker 1So let me ask you this, because there may be a day I get to go and I praise god for that, that never happens. You will go, but is there I? Can you feel spiritual things there?
Speaker 4such a great question. You know what?
Speaker 1I mean, when you're walking into a place that was the foundation of christianity, I mean there's got to be some kind of just like now it's predominantly Muslim right so it's like now, it's a spiritual yeah yeah, wait right you got to be able to feel it yes, I do
Speaker 4because I am kind of more sensitive that way when I when we've been in Israel just to get off track for a second. We've been in Israel twice now there, We've got rabbit holes man, there is no off track here.
Speaker 2Let God lead you, yes.
Speaker 4You can. I love Israel. Of all the places in the whole world, that's my favorite because I can feel that Jesus was there. Wow. I feel him in the land. I feel his presence still, like we do in church when worship is incredible yeah. Those kinds are our prayer time time. Yeah. But the land when you're walking in it, you know I'm in the holy land, yeah and then going to places like turkey where so much of the new testament, so much.
Speaker 4Yeah, walk where paul was at man so the part of what you'll feel spiritually is some of that warfare, because, um man, you'll find out how many people were martyred for that early church during the early church.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's really and like horrifically martyred yeah, I mean even nowadays, sister, it's happening oh, I know, in syria, lebanon, there's a few different guys, there's a few different places. Right now they say where they're just killing christian.
Speaker 4They're going into christian schools with automatic rifles and just yeah, well, I think they say around 300 000 a year are martyred for the lord jesus.
Speaker 2So it's horrific stand up and take your place, martyrs. Jesus will honor you. He does, I think he has it. There's a special place in heaven for martyrs.
Speaker 4Oh, absolutely, there really is man, I think the bible says yeah, for sure but you will feel stuff and especially if you're just asking the lord, can you show me things? What exactly do you want me to see? So for all, I'll tell you really fast when I went back in 2007 with pastor dave's mom, joy and um sharon rome, she's uh another days.
Speaker 4Yeah in law in law right sister-in-law yes uh like her, yeah, yeah it was the pastor at the the brones. Yes, thank you, yeah so she and I were roommates and one night we were in um our hotel room and she had already fallen asleep and I think I was like almost falling asleep, and then I thought I'm just gonna go use the restroom and we, we had a our bathroom light, just enough to kind of give off a light so that we weren't in a dark hotel room and as I'm starting to get up I see this nice dark shadow go by.
Speaker 4And I was like okay, I think that wasn't a person, you know that was, I just got chills. But you know what? This is the. I'm sorry, I'm again, I'm on.
Speaker 2No, you're good.
Speaker 4The whole time. Almost every single time I go to israel or turkey, there's there, are, there's a worshiper in my head the whole time and it's pastor sheree. She's singing in my head and the first week of being in turkey with these precious ladies after a week, I'm like god. I'm not getting any sleep because I can't turn pastor sheree off she sounds so beautiful and I love it but why can't? Why am I hearing her? He says I'm protecting your mind.
Speaker 1Wow, the worship was like a beautiful protective. It was a barrier.
Speaker 3It was a barrier. I mean.
Speaker 4I was already putting the blood of Jesus and stuff over me but at the same time.
Speaker 1It was like he was told there were things there that were trying to disrupt what was taking place.
Speaker 4Yeah, voices and thoughts and stuff.
Speaker 2So it was pretty powerful as you're, as you're talking and you're sharing this stuff. I want to share this with you because it's crazy. It wasn't even something that was on my radar with our trip. So there was the trip's like six thousand dollars. Man, it's not true.
Speaker 2You know, I did a lot of fundraising for it and I was God provided for it and I paid it, and then, all of a sudden, I get a call from and they're like hey, we just got another donation for your trip and they want you to be in a room by yourself. I'm like what? And it was like because I was willing to go and have a roommate and go through the trip and like just love on my roommate, bro, and we would have prayer nights, and like holy fire. And they say you're gonna be in a single room by yourself on this trip. I'm like and I feel god tell me that he wants me and him to be in this room and this time. And I'm like, wow, god, because it wasn't even something that was on my heart or something I was wanting, because there's just another thousand dollars that I had. You know it's a lot of money, dude, but so when this happened, I'm like, wow, god, this is really going to be like a spiritual pilgrimage for me, so I'm so excited for this trip.
Speaker 2Dad's like I can get a house without Rowdy for two weeks. Take care of my dog man. No more worried about your mother, She'll be fine.
Speaker 1What's she going to do without you have her listen to Pastor Sri's worship.
Speaker 3It does wonders for your head. Amen For your soul.
Speaker 4Amen, so yeah, so we were there until I was 10 in Turkey, yeah.
Speaker 3And then we went to.
Speaker 2What did you do for school while you were there? Yeah, how was school for you? Are you a good student? Yeah, I was Getting good grades.
Speaker 4I think I was a good student.
Speaker 1Well, what was school like for you in Turkey? Was there like an American speaking school that you went to?
Speaker 2Yes, oh, some base now I have to stop and think because we lived off base um yeah, once you're so far into the military, you start to get more privileges and opportunities and you can go off base and they'll they'll give you baq and bah and all kinds of exactly it's crazy but it was.
Speaker 4No, it was military for military yeah, yeah, right so definitely you know english speaking and all that stuff did you see anything crazy in turkey? When I was living then as a child.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4Well, I totally remember, and it has not changed. I totally remember that the women are in the fields Sometimes you'll see men out there and the men are like sitting around in the cafes having their tea and smoking their.
Speaker 2Are you kidding me? The women are doing everything and the men are chilling Quite a bit.
Speaker 4Oh my God. I mean there's definitely men that are working, but the women rarely join the men in their tea time, their chai time or whatever, okay, living off of base, did you have opportunities to encounter Turkish kids? Yes, and I'm sorry. I meant to say it's the Turkish people that were doing this not the American people, yeah, yeah, yeah. And not that that's bad.
Speaker 2No, it's just culture. It's culture Everywhere's different.
Speaker 4And that's something that I just stuck in my mind as a 9 and 10-year-old.
Speaker 2Were they wearing the hijabs or the head coverings? Do they do that over there? Not necessarily. Well, some did.
Speaker 4Okay, yeah, but yeah, some did Like. If you go further away from like the bigger, izmir is like the fourth largest city where this base was this military base was. So if you go further out into the villages and all, yeah, you'll see more of the traditional Muslim garb and stuff like that. But yeah, and I would see that and we'd see people, you know, with donkeys and camels and all of the kinds of livestock they did All the smells Absolutely, all the kinds of livestock they needed.
Speaker 2All the smells, absolutely, and they were poor.
Speaker 4You know there was a lot of poverty there, but yeah, it was a great experience for the most part Leaving off of base.
Speaker 1how did the Turkish people treat you well?
Speaker 4I don't remember anything bad ever happening to us. I do remember people getting yelled at, but it wasn't us.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 2All right yeah.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 2Where'd you go after Turkey?
Speaker 4So then my dad was stationed at Scott Air Force Base Illinois. I think that was it. No, sorry, we went back to I think it was El Paso, because my dad did another remote assignment.
Speaker 3Oh, wow.
Speaker 4And then we so I might be mixing these two locations with each other. So we went to we might have gone to Effie warren air force base in cheyenne, wyoming, first, and then my dad did one more remote assignment and so you guys went back to juarez, closer to family. El paso, yes and my mom worked again and then, um, then after that, and you know, no more kids but um and after that, then we went to scott air force base, illinois so here's st louis and lived there for two years.
Speaker 4And then my dad. He had gotten a really good relationship with a fellow airman and it was actually Thailand that he went to in 73.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And this guy was moving to Chandler Arizona when he was getting out of the Air Force. So my dad was like, hey, maybe that's where we should go, because I myself, myself, my brother steve and my mom we had terrible allergies and also asthma and states that had a lot of humidity a lot of pollen, we would just be like heaving and you know, having so many asthma attacks and stuff and how long did your dad do after he re-enlisted the second time?
Speaker 4uh, so he stayed with the communications and he put in his 20 years wow, he just kept re-enlisting.
Speaker 2Wow, yeah, yeah, exactly, wow, and so then, it's kind of what happens.
Speaker 4So he retired, he retired military he retired military, but then he went into nursing really yeah, wow so he caught the bug too.
Speaker 1Him and your mom worked together. They did Really. That's special.
Speaker 4And behavioral health.
Speaker 2Really.
Speaker 4Worked with drug addicts. They'd worked with.
Speaker 3Wow yeah.
Speaker 4And stuff like that. They were amazing together.
Speaker 1They, you know, your parents, are a strange dynamic Cause your mom's like four, eight and your dad's like six, four. You know what I mean. Like 6'4". You know what I mean. It's such a blows my mind. I know they're so cute.
Speaker 2White boy from Tennessee and a Mexican from Juarez.
Speaker 4And when my mom used to be like 4'11". Now she's probably 4'6".
Speaker 1I'm like stretch start.
Speaker 4You can't shrink, you can't shrink. I'm supposed to be five feet tall. I think I'm 4'11, 1� or 11 and a half.
Speaker 1I don't know. I just got to put it out there. Your dad has the best hair. Everybody says that For a dude in his 90s, that thing is still just beautiful. I don't know he still spends time on that thing, man, and he drinks lots of love. What happened to Jim.
Speaker 4Which one? My brother Jim. Well, they say it skips a generation.
Speaker 2Sorry bud.
Speaker 4I know, say it skips a generation.
Speaker 1sorry bud, I know now I can't even picture my brother, jim, with hair. Did you know your your mom's parents at all?
Speaker 4so, yes, I knew my mom's mother and my dad's mother, but my uh dad's father passed I believe it was before they got married, like within a year before they were married, say six months, and then my mom's father passed within a year after they were married so none of us grandkids got to meet our grandparent really our grandfather really, and he was the one of the brothers.
Meeting Al and Starting a Family
Speaker 2Uh, that was fighting. Wow, yeah, yeah so it was almost like the women had to carry this story or the tradition of what they did.
Speaker 1Would you guys make trips to Mexico?
Speaker 4Oh yeah, really Mexico and Tennessee, wow Okay.
Speaker 2So you have, up until this point, you've traveled. Yes, and me knowing you now, girl, you travel.
Speaker 3You go and you fly.
Speaker 2So is this like a bug, something that you experienced as a kid and were like dude, I just love it.
Speaker 4You like traveling. I was so used to it, definitely. So, yeah, I mean it was, I loved it. I loved meeting people going to other places.
Speaker 2Seeing new things man.
Speaker 4And then I was the oldest, so if you ask any of my brothers, I might have been a little bit bossy.
Speaker 3And a little mom. Second mom had to be. That's real.
Speaker 4Mom and dad are working. I got to take care of you boys, yeah and I always thank God for that, because I feel like it spiritually trained me for a number of things. To be tough in certain ways or facing certain fears, and stuff like that. Um, yeah, were the trips to mexico.
Speaker 1Difficult for you guys, because I mean looking at you, your blonde hair obviously speak english you're white, yeah, I mean um your brothers. They right none of you, none of your brothers.
Speaker 2Really look, mexican you know what I?
Speaker 1mean, so going down there. Was it like who are these gringos? You know what I mean? So going down there was it like?
Speaker 4who are?
Speaker 1these gringos. You know what I mean.
Speaker 4Yeah, I think people would be a little bit like fascinated, or they would want to talk to us. Like some people would want to try to ask Did you guys speak Spanish growing up?
Speaker 1Not really, oh no.
Speaker 4So actually I spoke Spanish until I was three.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 4But then, when my dad wasn't able to speak Spanish, back to me and he knew I was going to be going to um english schools on base and he want. My mother was literally learning to speak english herself oh, wow he was like we just got to stick with one language okay so he, they regret that now, because then I would be fluently bilingual my mom was from france.
Speaker 1She moved here in 66 with my dad and by the time I think I was 9 or 10, I'm like teach me French. So that would have been 80, right, so from 66 to 80, she had spoken so much English that she forgot French, and she's like I don't really remember much of it.
Speaker 4I'm like oh.
Speaker 1And now I have these cousins in my life that are French, gary, that only speak French. Yeah, and I don't use it, you lose it. And now I have these cousins in my life that are French, gary, that only speak French. Yeah, and I don't speak French now, and it's like ah, so I've got to use translators.
Speaker 2Thank God for translator. Yeah, we are blessed, so we were trying to do it through like Facebook Messenger.
Speaker 1Well, it's hard because Facebook Messenger doesn't do a translate. Okay, you translate, right? You know what I mean. So we started a Facebook page where we can comment on, and now I just hit the translate button. Oh, wow, or else it's just this whole process. You know what?
Speaker 4I mean but, yeah, technology, wonderful people though, great, oh, I know, yeah. So then, so when we? I will back up a little bit. So I had my first Holy Communion as a good Catholic, right when I was, I think, 11 years old, and I really love the Catholic Church because of the rituals.
Speaker 1Can I ask what that means, because I don't know much.
Speaker 4I'm so sorry, it's when.
Speaker 1You've got to go through the classes.
Speaker 4Yeah, you have to go through like the catechism kind of classes and then you make an acknowledgment that Jesus is. You know he died for us. I don't 100% know that they teach you to accept Jesus as your Savior but, it's kind of inferred. But you're kind of like grateful, and now you're going to receive Holy Communion kind of for the first time as a child. So you dress up and there's a special mass and the kids go up there and they kind of get blessed. This is what I remember.
Speaker 4I know it's probably changed a little bit I have no idea, yeah. And so it's a special kind of like almost consecration.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's special, it's very special, so check this out. I'm in jail and I was, I don't know, one of my jail stints man Catholic church baby. I just wanted to get to church for some. I don't know why, but I just knew.
Speaker 1I just let me go to, and so I go to the catholic church.
Speaker 2Man and I'm there, I'm sitting in the back and they're doing communion. I'm like I want to do communion god and the catholic guy's like if you have not done your holy communion, you can't take this communion.
Speaker 2I'm like they are serious they were really serious, they would not give me a cup and a cracker. I'm like I just want to take communion, my jesus man, because I'm christ, I grew up in the church, I know what communion is. But if you have not done the holy communion, your first one, and had the official thing in a Catholic church, they won't let you.
Speaker 4Yeah, they're still pretty much that way, okay.
Speaker 1I would like to go visit a Catholic church one time, just to see what it's like.
Speaker 2I want to do that with a Mormon one.
Speaker 4I have been in a Mormon ward.
Speaker 2A temple, a ward.
Speaker 4I've been in the temple before it's been consecrated, they'll let you tour.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4Yeah, but with the whole Catholic thing again. My mother modeled that which was awesome the prayer and like a reverence for.
Speaker 3God and stuff.
Speaker 2Was there a fear of God in your home or a love of God?
Speaker 4Well, both, I would say both. Like you just knew you don't want to make the Lord upset that type of thing. My mother just modeled it by having that reverential posture. Nobody's perfect. She wasn't perfect. She had six kids to take care of and it was exhausting and there was a lot to do but, she still had this modeling of just being aware of him and praying and mentioning it. It's beautiful it was. It was really sweet and again, my dad was part of that, but you guys praying before meals and kind of stuff.
Speaker 2I remember that.
Speaker 4Yeah, I don't know if it was every single meal, but I definitely remember that.
Speaker 2When you went to bed, did you say your goodnight prayers?
Speaker 4I did and I just had a love for Jesus. I also had a love for Mary, but I remember not long after I was probably 12 or 13, then you could go to confession as a child.
Speaker 2You would go into those confessional booths right when the priests in there correct and you go into confession confess your sins.
Speaker 4You get to find out what your penance was, which could be terrible things like okay, I want you to rip open a pillow every feather that goes out. You need to pull it back.
Speaker 3You know silly stuff I mean weird stuff yeah like, can you imagine working hard?
Speaker 4for say 20 hell marys and 10 our fathers and all this other stuff which which you know when you're a child.
Speaker 1You're like who's going to?
Speaker 4take the priest that's doing the confession.
Speaker 2On what, how bad you are confessing what you're doing.
Speaker 4Oh, yeah, whatever your sins were for the week that you're confessing.
Speaker 1Wow, so was that? I mean, so was that like? So it was not like a written.
Speaker 2okay, if somebody confesses this Murder, then they got to do Well no, I mean like say, someone comes in and says hey man. I lost my temper this week.
Speaker 1Is there like a set thing that they know? Are they taught like okay if somebody confesses anger, or are they just like being led by the spirit of what they think? God, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4Oh wow. I feel like they did it by their own decision, and also maybe if the ones that were actually like closer to God?
Speaker 1Could you imagine a priest having a bad day and someone coming in and him being like I'm nailing?
Speaker 2this dude. No, you got to do a hundred Hail Marys and a thousand.
Speaker 4Yeah, they wouldn't make it out of there I could just see that yes. And I was. I, thankfully, I think. I repeated the same sins every week. I was mad at my brothers, I didn't want to do what my mom said, or you know things like that when you're a child. But I also distinctly remember hearing from the Lord. It was probably one of the first times I heard from the Lord and I heard him say you don't have to confess to the priest, you can confess to me.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4And I was like oh, okay. And that was one of the again the first things I probably ever heard him say to me, and then there was a span of time where I didn't really I probably was hearing him and I didn't recognize it. But, that time I did Wow. So that was really cool for me, because the one thing about the Catholic Church that wasn't exciting is that and this is back then in the 60s, 70s, 80s- whatever was that you felt so much shame for being a sinner.
Speaker 4You were a sinner and you should be ashamed of yourself and you were going to get the penance that you have to do, and you just always felt guilty and ashamed. And then I did go to Catholic school one year in sixth grade no grace huh.
Speaker 4Well, it wasn't shown by the priests, or none. Maybe there was a few, but I didn't get. Some of the Catholic priests were cool, though in the military bases I would say a couple of them were alcoholics, but they were cool. They were like, hey, I'm going to take all the youth kids bowling, come, but they were cool. Yeah, they were like, hey, I'm going to take all the youth kids bowling.
Speaker 3Come on We'd have fun.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah yeah, and we'd be like wow, we're having a good time, but the shame and the guilt was something that in my later years, I had to really get prayed off.
Speaker 2Yeah. Because you carry it with you. What were you doing as a kid to give you so much shame and guilt it?
Speaker 1was the way the church made you feel. Oh, the fire and brimstone You're going to hell.
Speaker 4You're a sinner, we're all sinners, we're just always sinners.
Speaker 2Well, that was what church was like back then. It didn't matter Catholic Baptist, that's what it was Correct.
Speaker 1Turn and burn.
Speaker 4Fire and brimstone era, that's how it was, yeah, and I don't distinctly remember any priest yelling at us, but she just felt lowly like oh man, you're just such a sinner, you know jesus died for you. You better be grateful.
Speaker 1You know something like that, okay, things like that.
Speaker 2So where's the joy in that I know?
Speaker 4I know that's a heavy, yeah. So we moved to chandler, arizona. My dad's out of the air force um what year was that?
Speaker 2I was a freshman in high school Up to this point outside of the Holy Communion. 77-ish.
Speaker 4What year was?
Speaker 1it 77?
Speaker 474. 74?. Yeah, I graduated in 78. No 75. Yeah, I graduated in 78. I was two years old.
Speaker 2Up to this point, sis, with your Holy Communion and a couple, you said you had the baptism. Was there any other encounters or experiences with God personally that you were?
Speaker 4I would just say overall, because my mom modeled love for Jesus, I always loved Jesus.
Speaker 1She did mention, when you were in the bathroom, that she heard from God and God told her you don't have to confess your sins to the priest, you can confess them to him, yeah.
Speaker 4Which was. This was like I was about 12 years old, so good so good, so you had a moment in confession.
Speaker 2I totally did. Wow, you heard, god, I did. Was that like one of the first times?
Speaker 4Yes, that I distinctly knew it was him, because why would I make that up?
Speaker 2Come on, and so I know, oh, you know when God speaks to you, man, exactly you know.
Speaker 1I tell people all the time do you speak like that to yourself? They're like no, that's how you know it's God.
Speaker 4Exactly.
Speaker 1You know what I mean, Especially if it's something good. I know I don't tell myself, hey, let's go pray for that guy. You know what I mean. That's something God would tell me. I'm not walking around like let's look for people to pray for.
Speaker 4You know what I mean, yes, I do, and so I did feel like I always was in love with Jesus, but being a good Catholic, because we were involved in the Catholic Church here, and especially in the church in Chandler, we were Eucharistic ministers, that's like myself and my brother Troy and my parents, that's people that could actually administer communion because they needed help. So you went to these classes and you became, you know this person.
Speaker 2They had altar boys. What did the girls do?
Speaker 4Not well now I think back then I don't remember girls being altar girls.
Speaker 2Oh, there are, but now they are now.
Speaker 4I've seen it and I've gone a couple times to the church.
Speaker 3Would you go to Chandler High School? Yeah, wow, really.
Speaker 4All of us graduated from Chandler High.
Speaker 2School Chandler Wolves. Yeah, yeah, there you go, yeah.
Speaker 4Yeah, so I was such a good Catholic that I was the president of the Catholic Youth Organization. Oh wow, I did sports. I wanted to be a cheerleader, all that stuff, but because of the asthma I had it limited me.
Speaker 1My lungs were always like you in the academic, extracurricular stuff.
Speaker 4I was on the National Honor Society, but that's no big deal.
Speaker 2Good grades I did, okay, any opportunities for college scholarships after high school. No no.
Speaker 4And you know my parents, you know we're always a product of how they grew up, how we grew up. They were amazing parents. I mean I did feel loved. There was my dad had to be kind of like not the hammer, but he was definitely like the tough one needed to be to enforce six kids, five boys yeah and my brothers always tease me that I never got spanked because I was at the end of the line when they were getting spanked. So my dad was tired, didn't want to spanked because.
Speaker 2I was at the end of the line when they were getting spanked so my dad was tired, didn't want to spank me.
Speaker 4But no, and then my mom. You know she was just a nurturing mom, so let's see, it was around my sophomore year, I believe. No, I'll backtrack a second. So yeah, it was end of my freshman summer, sophomore year. My mother is spiritually so hungry for more.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And the church in Chandler. The Catholic church was wonderful but she was not getting fed spiritually at all yeah. And she was just like crying out to the Lord I need more, I need more. What else is there? This is not enough.
Speaker 2That's real. I watched him go through that when we were at Mountain View Church. He was going through this day and he just knew there's more. God told him go find Pastor Tom. It's what brought. I swear to God, it's how we got here, dude, pastor Tom Carlini.
Speaker 3Fantastic, thank you, jesus, that tapestry.
Speaker 4It turned out that a charismatic priest came visiting the Chandler Church, my mom, pulled him aside. I remember this and she's like I need more, I need more. And he goes. I know what you need. You need the.
Speaker 3Holy Spirit.
Speaker 4So he sent us to the Newman center at ASU.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4And we went there several times and we were watching those Holy rollers you know having so much fun jumping up and down praising the Lord, long-haired hippie kids oh wow, Because this is the 70s.
Speaker 2Oh wow, this is like 76. Jesus people yes, oh wow 75, 76.
Speaker 4And they're just so full of joy in the Lord. And my mom was like this is kind of what I've been looking for. Wow, so we would go there often, and then finally we just what did you call this place?
Speaker 1Newman Center, newman.
Speaker 4Center. It's still there at ASU.
Speaker 1Is it like a cathedral? Or yeah, what is it?
Speaker 4It's part of a building, it's inside of a building, but they call it the Newman Center.
Speaker 2But back then it was a Catholic church.
Speaker 4It wasn't a Catholic church, but they did services there. Oh yeah, and it was like mostly charismatic Catholics, so Catholics who became spirit-filled.
Speaker 2Oh, okay, and so we went there. What is it? It's an off-branch of the Catholic Church, the spirit-filled ones. I love that. Think about this right, because this was the 70s.
Speaker 1This is when the Jesus movement was happening just like that movie that came out a couple years ago or last year. Yeah, jesus People, or whatever, the Jesus revolution, that's right.
Speaker 4That's what was going on yeah. So I was part of that.
Speaker 3And my mom, yeah, so we we got spirit filled, wow.
Speaker 4I started speaking in tongues right away. I got um spirit filled with my dad. We went, we accepted um Holy spirit at the same place. Man, it's a personal walk, exactly. And so then we stayed catholics for a few more years and then by my senior year we're like we're doing newman center well, we did the newman center. And then she. Then it was like, right before I graduated, right as I was graduating, she was like, okay, I think the lord's leading us out of the catholic church wow and so it was a big transition, but I trusted my mom.
Speaker 4You know my buddy.
Speaker 1Josimo, don't you.
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 1Yeah, he's a Catholic boy and still does Catholic man, Still does dual services Catholic church what Right In the morning on Sundays? He was here on the one service where we had the long baptisms.
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 1And Cool Started the long baptisms. Yes, and cool started speaking in tongues, and so we have this joke. What's a catholic boy like you doing, speaking in?
Speaker 3tongues you know, what I mean.
Speaker 4Well, yeah, I love it. Yeah, and it was a catholic priest, a charismatic priest that told my mom, you need the holy spirit so that's literally what changed our lives and a whole new trajectory right holy spirit holy spirit and so I was like 16, 17, I I don't have it marked, you know down pat.
Speaker 2But honestly, Things change once you get Holy Spirit and you are on fire. It's literally an activation, absolutely, it really is. You're in power, it's the power of God.
Speaker 4And you're like, when you're that age I was, I couldn't quite understand it. So I was I wouldn't say it was conflicted, I was just like, hmm, you know, I still was thinking about. I was actually thinking about becoming a nun. So I stayed in a convent for one night to just see what it was like. And those nuns were so cute, playing bingo, having their little snacks. And they were like 89 years old, like my mom is now with their little habits and stuff and I was like they're so cute.
Speaker 4but no, I'm like I think I want kids so that settled it for me. And then we left the church, you know, um, all of us, pretty much almost all of us all at the same time, and then we just started going to churches that were spirit filled do you remember what the name of the first church was you went to after? I want to say trinity church in Chandler right there in Chandler. It's on McQueen before you get to just south of Chandler Boulevard.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, wow.
Speaker 4Yeah, we had a great relationship with those pastors. And then we went to a couple of churches, like in the Scottsdale area, the Valley, and we were hungry for more of the Lord.
Speaker 3Yeah, we, and we would just we were hungry for more of the Lord.
Speaker 4We were so hungry and we would just go to conferences and wherever a special speaker was.
Speaker 1It was out of the norm. Do you think, looking back, like you're like thank you God for just putting that hunger in my mom? I mean because I mean not that there's anything wrong with the Catholic Church as far as I'm concerned, yeah, but you could have been there for 40 years. You could have been stuck in this. You know what I mean.
Speaker 4I literally thanked her last week. I said, Mom, I am so thankful that you were obedient to ask that priest and get a feel and listen to him. And we went to the Newman Center, all that other stuff.
Speaker 1For you personally, would you say this was a defining moment for you spiritually.
Speaker 2Yes, it was, but I still was young and immature. Yeah, you didn't understand it right yeah, I was still young.
Speaker 4I was. I loved the lord. I've always loved the lord yeah and you know I I go through the hang-ups everybody does with like spirituals, up and down and dry seasons and all but I've always loved the lord.
Speaker 2You do any drinking and druggings not drugging, but drinking.
Speaker 4Drinking, okay, all right yeah, you're coming into being an adult and being free, and yeah so I had a few boyfriends, but just harmless relationships. And then, um, I started working in a nursing home when I was 18.
Speaker 2Where were you? You're living here.
Speaker 4I'm living with my parents in. Chandler.
Speaker 1Do your parents still live in the same house?
Speaker 4They did up until 2004.
Speaker 1They lived in the Chandler house from 75 until 2004.
Speaker 2It's almost 30 years. Did any of the boys buy it or anything? No, it's not in the family.
Speaker 4Well, because it was. I was a realtor at that time, but it was when prices were going way up and it was an old house and the neighborhood was going down downhill.
Speaker 2Sell it, make some money.
Speaker 4Get out of there.
Speaker 1I lived in the same house from 74 till 93.
Speaker 4Oh wow yeah.
Speaker 1Grew up in the same house, same neighborhood.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah, I loved it. Where was?
Speaker 1that Mesa.
Speaker 4Okay, yeah, yeah. And what is that neighborhood like?
Speaker 2now. Now, it's the hood man.
Speaker 1Now it's Correct. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 4I know.
Speaker 1Now it's predominantly Hispanic.
Speaker 4Yeah, and just a lot of rentals or a lot of different kinds of yeah, and that's what happened where my parents were living. It just started going downhill.
Speaker 1Whoever bought the house actually did pretty nice with it, because it looks really nice. Oh good, a lot better than we ever had it.
Speaker 4Well, there you go, because my parents' house looks exactly the same as when they sold it in 2004.
Speaker 3They haven't painted it.
Speaker 4I think they re-roofed, re-shingled the roof but, the shed is bad. Everything looks terrible. There's aluminum foil on the windows.
Speaker 3Uh-oh, uh-oh. You know what that?
Speaker 2means.
Speaker 4What does that mean, Rowdy? No, you're using dope.
Speaker 2They're up all night and they need the tin foil to keep the light out so I can sleep in the day.
Speaker 1Either that or they're growing marijuana. Oh, that's true.
Speaker 3I don't want anybody to see that's so funny.
Speaker 4So then, one of the nurses that I worked for in a nursing home. She wanted me to meet her husband's best friend. He was in pilot training out at Williams Gateway.
Speaker 3Williams Air.
Speaker 4Force Base. So meet him, and it's not Alan.
Speaker 3Oh.
Speaker 4I think God got me in that relationship to prepare me for. Alan.
Speaker 1Okay, my mighty man of God, come on. Where'd you go to nurse? Did you go to nursing school?
Speaker 4I didn't. I was just working in a nursing home as an aide. Oh right and she liked me so much she was Catholic still. I wasn't, but she just thought oh, you should meet my husband's best friend so we dated for altogether two and a half years, and oh wow and it and it. It was a great relationship, but it didn't work it wasn't the one. It wasn't the one it wasn't, but I made mistakes with that relationship.
Speaker 2So that was your first one it was yeah and back then.
Speaker 4I don't know if you all remember this, but this is is. I'm going to get real with you.
Speaker 3Come on.
Speaker 4Do you remember there were stickers on cars that were like bikers, do it better.
Speaker 1Yeah, no yeah.
Speaker 4And my sticker said fighter pilots do it better. I'm so that would be something that a priest would give me lots.
Speaker 3He'd be like oh yeah, I can't even think of all the things to tell you for this, I know.
Speaker 4but anyway I I look back and I go how did my parents even let me come in the house? Sticker on my car, so anyhow.
Speaker 1Um, so that was a two and a half did you find yourself to be kind of a, a hippie?
Speaker 4kind of a little bit.
Speaker 1I wasn't so much a hippie because I thought that you did drugs or anything, but kind of fell into that.
Speaker 4I would say I was just trying to find myself. I hate that expression seriously, it's a real thing, though it's a real thing when you're that young, especially when you're coming out of being a kid under mom and
Speaker 1dad's thumb and you're coming into adulthood, I mean, you really are finding yourself.
Speaker 4It's so hard for young people to find their lane and also make sure your faith is founded on your own, like connection with God. I had a love for God and Jesus and Holy Spirit, because I was Spirit-filled, but I didn't have a deep correct.
Speaker 2But like I wasn't, walking or building it up, and I wanted to have fun. I wanted to be a young 19 and 20-year-old girl.
Speaker 4That's out there which wasn't as risky as most people.
Speaker 2I know it's different than back then. Back then it was a lot different, sure, sure.
Speaker 4And so that was a two-and-a-half-year relationship. He was a great guy, he was amazing.
Losing Matthew: Finding Peace in Tragedy
Speaker 1But, thank God he wasn't the one, and then thank god he wasn't the one, yeah, and then a week later, I met alan at a bar.
Speaker 4Really bobby mckees, have you ever heard? Oh, yeah, yeah, wow. He asked me to dance and so we it. As he was walking towards me, it turned from a fast song into a slow song, so he was kind of stuck like I am asking her dance, but we're gonna actually slow dance now wow but the song was Endless Love from Lionel Richie and Diana Ross and I love that song.
Speaker 2I love you star. She still remembers this song. Bro, do you remember what he was wearing?
Speaker 3Absolutely I love you dude, he is hot, he is hot.
Speaker 4Oh, that's great, I know. So I had just turned 21.
Speaker 221. I think you're blushing a little bit. Maybe a little.
Speaker 4She is, she is and you know, one of my best friends was half Japanese also. So, I don't know, it was one of those things where I just had a thing for Asians.
Speaker 2No, so, like when you saw him, did you get that? This is the one.
Speaker 4I don't know that. I thought that, but I just thought he looked nice Because you've seen Alan smile. He has a great smile A lot of testimonies, sister.
Speaker 2they have that, they look at the and they're like this is the one I'm like.
Speaker 3I want that moment.
Speaker 2God, you got to give me that, so I know that this is the one Right.
Speaker 4I know, and he looked great and he was very charismatic.
Speaker 2You liked what you saw. I did.
Speaker 4Yeah, and he asked me to dance to an amazing song.
Speaker 1Is he half Japanese? He's half Japanese, all right. What's the other half?
Speaker 4American. His dad is a good old boy from Kentucky.
Speaker 1All right, yeah, all right.
Speaker 4And so we danced like five dances.
Speaker 1Oh wow.
Speaker 2I know each other and then we went into a relationship and um he.
Speaker 4Then he asked me to marry him, and so how long did you guys date? We only dated three, and a half months when he asked me to marry him and on the night he asked me to marry him, we got pregnant.
Speaker 3Oh, wow, yeah, Okay. So that's part of my testimony and I love it because, God is such a redeemer.
Speaker 2He's so faithful.
Speaker 4He's so faithful he blesses even our stupidity in the things that we do yeah how we get things out of whack, not according to his timeline.
Speaker 1He takes our stupidity into consideration? Yes, he does.
Speaker 2I love that about our God man. He's like I accounted for it. Yeah, he's like this one here.
Speaker 4Yeah, I got you covered, son, yeah and I'll tell you I was so grateful, at least that, when alan asked me to marry him and then we got pregnant that night. But we didn't know for a good month and a half ish yeah I already knew he wasn't marrying me because I was pregnant yeah, amen, because he wanted to marry me come on but then we had to move everything up a few months so he was in pilot training out at columbus air force base in um oh, so you wanted.
Speaker 2You wanted to be married before you had the kid yes, okay, all right, thank you, because I heard I heard you say we moved everything up a little. Oh so she wanted to be an official wife with a ring.
Speaker 3Now here's my baby okay, right, okay, thank you good what is that out of weather?
Speaker 4yeah, okay, all right okay and so then we um so we got married in, uh, april 24th of 1982. So we've been married 43 years, come on, he's better at remembering that oh really al's got a good memory yeah, oh, bro, I can't wait to get you.
Speaker 2I got my eyes on you. I'm praying you in, bro Jesus get him.
Speaker 4So we got married April. Then we had Matthew, our first son, September 13th. Okay, and actually I ended up having, when I went into labor, my blood pressure shot up and I started getting like some of the swelling effects of having a problem. And so and this was on base and we were at Hill Air Force Base, utah, so he was starting to fly F-16s at the time and well, he flew for 19 years. He flew them for 19 years, wow.
Speaker 2But so it was our first assignment and we're there, I'm having this is your first pregnancy, first pregnancy, and you're having a hard labor and actually the labor was fine.
Speaker 4It was. It went pretty quick, but my blood pressure shot up and all. So after I delivered matthew, uh, the doctor came in a few hours later and he's like hey, how are you feeling? I I go. You know, and having been asthmatic since I was 11 and being in all the meds, I know what it feels like to feel like your heart's beating out of your body and I go yeah, I feel like I've got too much epinephrine in me and he goes, okay, okay, he goes.
Speaker 4We're just watching you. I go, is everything okay, he goes? Well, well, just, you know, everything's kind of elevated. And then within a half hour I started going into seizures.
Speaker 3Oh, wow.
Speaker 4And what happened was I had a lot of women that well, 5% of all pregnancies, women get preeclampsia and I just describe it as it's like being allergic to being pregnant. You get this reaction.
Speaker 2Allergic to being pregnant, and then of the 5%.
Speaker 4I'm too'm too simple. I know, dr, j would not say that she's much more medically than I am but then, um, but then out of that five percent, two and a half percent, of that five percent get eclampsia, which happens after delivery and that's what I had so I had that, uh very. I went into seizures and Alan just being the you know guy on the side, the husband on the side, trying to figure out what's going on, because my head goes back and everything's like.
Speaker 2Oh my.
Speaker 3God, he just reaches for my tongue.
Speaker 4Like, at least she's not going to swallow or do anything.
Speaker 2But yeah, he was freaking out, Everybody was freaking out Because they didn't know what was going on, and so it's like all the family there Well, witness the birth.
Speaker 4No, because we were living in Utah. And so my mom had not come yet, Cause we weren't sure when I was going to deliver. Okay, so, uh, so that happens. It takes about I don't know 10, 15 minutes for the doctor to figure figure out what was going on and he finally realizes she's having eclampsia.
Speaker 2So they're doing all these things. Do what they do and help you out of that.
Speaker 4Before my organs start shutting down.
Speaker 2Jesus, Because that's what will happen. My God Star.
Speaker 4Yeah, I know, I was basically out of it for about 24 hours. I remember hearing him say okay, we're going to put this thing down your nose. It's going to scratch your throat, so don't throw it up. And I, as soon as it hits my throat, even though I'm out of it, I'm like but yeah, no, he made it go down my throat ng tube, nasal gastric tube, yeah and so I had that for 24 hours and a few other things. But alan it was his, I would call it is one of his first real experiences of. Oh my gosh, this is out of my control.
Speaker 3So he calls my mom, of course. And then she comes up.
Speaker 4I think she flew up from Chandler.
Speaker 2Well, yeah.
Speaker 3You're not in a good yeah.
Speaker 4So I could have died literally I could have died, and he would have been a dad with a little boy.
Speaker 1When you say out of his control, being a pie to pie, he's used to being very much in control and now he's in this moment where he can't do nothing.
Speaker 4And I'm not allowed to tell his testimony, so I better not say too much, no, you're good.
Speaker 3He goes. Don't tell everybody, but it's so cool.
Speaker 2You're going to come on and share it bud Part of the story.
Speaker 4Amen, but that was where I would say that was probably one of the first few times that I think he could see God at work, because you know, my mom comes and she's praying and people are so it was just one of those things where God really showed up and I was fine after a while and
Speaker 4so then over the course of and just tell me if I'm going too fast, but over the course of us being in the military, Alan witnessed five accidents and in four of them the pilots died oh, wow um, so that was also kind of a shaking and a rattling, yeah, and for both of us, but especially for people he knew people. He knew his, his wing squadron commander and all this other stuff.
Speaker 2Is this like accidents at war?
Speaker 4no, no, no, no, Thank you. No, they, it was training.
Speaker 1Accidents happen man. So, he raised being raised here in Arizona and and uh.
Speaker 2Luke Air Force.
Speaker 1Base out there. You heard about it all the time and it was always trained in accidents. Yeah, yeah, cause he that's where one of the places.
Speaker 4Yeah, wow. So but me that pushed me further into the Lord, right Like, oh my gosh, these accidents are happening and I could feel like I was getting fearful of he's going to die.
Speaker 2Oh, so you're going into prayer for Al.
Speaker 3Yeah for Al.
Speaker 2It pushed me deeper into the Lord, into your walk with God, absolutely, that's part of what brought me to my knees.
Speaker 4That, and then being a mom.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4As every mom knows.
Speaker 2You know your kids will do that because you love your kids, oh yeah, the things they're going through. How many?
Speaker 4kids did you have? So we had another son two years later, Christopher, and so and just let me know if I'm going- no complications with that one. I started to have the same things, and so they were, they were aware, okay, and so they said you know, that was it.
Speaker 4I can't really have any more kids because it'd be too okay, difficult okay yeah, so um, but yeah so you had two boys two amazing boys, matthew and christopher, and um alan stayed in the air force for eight more years and then he started deciding I want to be an airline pilot so excuse me um I love flying, but I just I'm done flying for the government utah
Speaker 4the whole time or we lived in utah for the first three years four years, I'm sorry. Then we were in mcdillard first base, tampa, florida, all right for three years and we had already done some of his initial training and stuff. At Alamogordo there's an Air Force base there.
Speaker 1So being a military child, is it different than being a military?
Speaker 4wife, yes. And part of that was because, yeah, exactly Just watching my parents do everything and actually we grew up kind of poor. My parents were very poor growing up. They probably only ate.
Speaker 1I'm sure the military back then didn't pay like they do now.
Speaker 4Yeah, but even in their own childhoods, they probably only ate meat a couple times a year.
Speaker 3And my mom was dirt poor in Mexico.
Speaker 4So then, when they got married and had us six kids, we didn't realize we were poor until I was 12. And I see this truck pull up the day before Thanksgiving and a guy comes with a big box and a turkey's in it and he leaves it at our porch. And I look at my parents, I go does this mean we're poor?
Speaker 2Because there was food canned food. But people were looking out for us Thanksgiving dinner.
Speaker 4Man, yeah, and so so we grew up that way. My dad was um an airman or sergeant, but then Alan was an officer, so that was a different yeah.
Speaker 2Another level. There's a little more. There's a little more money as an officer.
Speaker 4Exactly Well, money and a different kind. He and I always were like nope, we love everyone, we look at everyone the same. Come on, man, do you know what I'm trying to say? Yeah, I do, because there's no status, we don't want to treat them.
Speaker 1You weren't better than anybody else Not at all Just because we were officers. We're not better.
Speaker 3Correct. I love that.
Speaker 1That's great Because that's a real thing and you see that in the dude's freaking awesome Thank you, but you would never know that he was, even when people bring up his, you know whatever, he was, the top gun. He's like.
Speaker 2He's a certified badass.
Speaker 4That's kind of what I say, but when you talk to him, he just shuns it off.
Speaker 1I know he's very humble, and I love that about him, dude.
Speaker 4Yeah, he's sure of himself, he's confident, but he is humble, he's humble.
Speaker 2In Alaska there were officers that would literally smoke, and when they're done smoking they would flick their cigarettes and hey, private, get over here and pick up my butts.
Speaker 4That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2There was no way.
Speaker 4We're on the same team here dude. Doesn't enter the yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah exactly. He's never treated me any different than he did anybody else. Amen buddy.
Speaker 4I respect that for him yeah, so he maintained that.
Speaker 1Wasn't he in that life group. No, I don't think he was, oh, okay.
Speaker 4But then when he got hired in the airlines, that was a whole whole different world. Okay, now I have another adjustment to make. Yeah, I go from okay, I'm afraid he's going to die in the airplane crash to now okay, he gets to have all this fun flying with adults and some actually nice looking flight attendants and I'm home with little kids.
Speaker 3So I'm saying all that to be real.
Speaker 4No, that's real and to also say I really had to press into God all these years for various things. And it didn't matter that I grew up a Christian and I knew the Lord and I loved Jesus.
Speaker 2There were some things that I had to overcome. That's real dude. Yeah, yeah, because you're at home with these kids, little guys kind of losing yourself. Yeah, because that's I've I work in recovery and stuff. We a lot, of, a lot of ladies. They have these kids and they like lose themselves as a woman, right. So you're there and you're having to take care of these kids and he's out flying and gallivanting around and seeing different. It's like wait a sec, kid now.
Speaker 4So your mind, the enemy's throwing these fiery darts at you oh wow, I did I had, and then I was blessed to be able a principal at a school. When we were in tampa, florida, a principal there at the school saw me in church and he knew me a little bit. But he said the lord told me that he would like you to teach third grade here at our little christian school. I said, oh, I have to.
Speaker 1Told me that he would like you to teach third grade here at our little Christian school.
Speaker 4I said oh, I have to pray about that he told you, but he didn't tell me. Well, it turns out it was the Lord. So I taught third grade. It was so tiny there was nine students.
Speaker 2Yeah, but still.
Speaker 4But that was really cool, because then I got to put the boys in Christian school.
Speaker 3Come on.
Speaker 4And so that started me and the boys going to church for quite a few years, and Alan would only he was a C&E.
Speaker 2I love you, dude, christmas and Easter only. He's a CEO.
Speaker 4That's right.
Speaker 3Let me add that home.
Speaker 4And so, but yeah, that was part of my journey in our early 20, first 20 years of uh, you know being married and and growing together and and we had so 20, 21 to 40.
Speaker 2Yes, was your time where he was in the military and then went into the airlines.
Speaker 4But then he also went out to luke air force base and got uh hired by the reserve unit out there. So he continued flying okay f-16s until he was I don't know it was. Yeah, he did a total of like 19 years of that. So just a lot of stuff that was could easily be like putting a lot of pressure on us marriage wise or? Raising two boys and I've.
Speaker 4I love boys because I had brothers that I don't know what to do with girls but, but, also just the whole thing with the sports and the activities, boy scouting and just a lot of stuff did you do all that I try to.
Speaker 2I love that star. Yeah, because he was busy in a way yes, flying in different cities and different being pulled away, so it's just you raising these boys and he would do what he could.
Speaker 4Of course, yeah, I was a great man, but a lot of the time it's just you raising these boys. And he would do what he could.
Speaker 2Of course, yeah, I was a great man, but a lot of the time it's on you yeah, two jobs, so yeah, and so then you?
Speaker 4were working two jobs well no, he was, he was working yeah and then at some point he was like well, what do you want to be when you grow up? So I I became a physical therapist assistant I went to school and I was a pta for five, six years and then the lord called me out of that and I became a realtor that's funny because, I love that he did that, though that's so intense when you grow up he knew he knew you had sacrificed your whole life for the family and the boys.
Speaker 4And now it's like I love that it was great and I couldn't do nursing because I don't like needles, but I love the medical field so that was really fun.
Speaker 1When did you start doing that? After the boys were old?
Speaker 4So I started school when Matthew, our oldest, was in junior high and Chris was in element. Like I think Chris was in sixth grade and Matt was in eighth grade.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4I'm trying to remember 97, 2001. Actually, yes, chris was in uh fourth grade and matt was in sixth grade. So then, when I graduated, matt was in eighth grade and chris was in sixth grade.
Speaker 2How old are these boys now?
Speaker 4so matthew, my oldest. He passed when he was 19 years old, so that's another part of the story. Yeah, so when Matt was 19 and three months well, both of my boys, both of our boys, have September birthdays this was the year 2001,. When 9-11 happened, wow. So Matt graduated from high school in May of 2001. Chris's baseball team he was on the baseball team center field. They won the five state championship. It was a great year for that.
Speaker 4He was a sophomore. Alan takes Matthew to New York City as a graduation president and he's standing at one of the piers and in the background are the Twin Towers. So Alan gets a snapshot of Matthew and the Twin Towers in that. Alan gets a snapshot of Matthew and the Twin Towers in that shot, and then a few months later that was in May, and then September 11th happens.
Speaker 4Matthew was trying to be a student down at U of A but when September 11th happened it was just a really tough few months, if everybody can remember. You're roughly the same age as Matthew or Chris, I don't know, I'm 40.
Speaker 284.
Speaker 4So is Chris 84. So he's about to be 41. Yeah, so, but Matt was going through a lot of stuff. It was having a really hard time and he was using some drugs. He was oh. So, Damn Partly to cope, partly to, you know, because they both were such interesting. Chris and Matt were such interesting to listen to right after 9-11 happened and we were watching the videos of people jumping out of those twin towers because they were going to get on fire or something.
Speaker 4And Matt goes. When they were telling people in one of the towers they could go back in because everything was fine, matt goes, I would never have gone back in and Chris goes I would have Because he was more academic and more of a just that work ethic.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4Totally different people. So then, matthew, in December 21st of 01, he had bronchitis and he had asthma, since he was four years old, and he had pneumonia. And I knew he had the first two asthma and bronchitis, but I didn't know he had pneumonia and he was taking Tylenol PM to help himself sleep at night, because it's hard when you're all congested and stuff. And he had just started taking an anti-anxiety medicine because of the anxiety he was having with everything with 9-11 and not being able to get work and stuff.
Speaker 4It was hard those months and then he had had his wisdom teeth removed a few months earlier and the week he was sick. The last few days he was sick at home. He was having horrible headaches so the night before he passed. He took the tylenol pm, the, the um anti-anxiety medicine and the pain meds yes, which was?
Speaker 3oxycontin that's a bad mix.
Speaker 4Yes bad mix.
Speaker 3And so he died in his sleep At 19?
Baby David and Processing Grief Differently
Speaker 419 and three months. Yeah, dang. And so again, alan will tell his own testimony. But we, alan and I, had left that next morning the boys were sleeping in. We left to go get our cars fixed because we were going to go to California for Christmas and we called in and matt would always answer the phone and chris answers and who's 17?
Speaker 4chris is 17, matt is 19 okay so chris answers and we're like okay, go wake up your brother, because we're going to be home pretty soon. We're just dropping off christmas presents at my mom and dad's and we'll be there.
Speaker 2Chris found him and then he calls back a few minutes later I know.
Speaker 4And he says I can't wake up, matthew he's, I think he's dead. And so I'm driving and alan's like, okay, okay, we're gonna call 9-1-1, let's you know, we're gonna. He said you call 9-1 911, we'll call his best friend, joe, and get him over there. And so we were 20 minutes from home so I drove, sorry, like a bat out of hell.
Speaker 2Hell yeah.
Speaker 4Through Christmas traffic to get back to Ahwatukee, which is where we were living at the time, and Alan was talking to Joe saying get over there, Joe. Chris is trying to figure this out. Excuse me, and I was just having almost like an out-of-body experience just thinking what in God's name is happening here?
Speaker 4And so we get there. There's three cop cars in our driveway. There's an ambulance that had just left and Matt was still there. But we ran up the stairs because it was a two-story and the cops were at the top in Matt's room, and I think there was maybe still a paramedic or an EMT there. I can't remember. But I saw Chris walking out of his bedroom and so I just grabbed him and I just hugged him and we're crying. I said I'm so sorry you had to experience this.
Speaker 3Chris.
Speaker 2Oh God, because I'm thinking of him, of course, his mama, yeah, yeah and so I'm talking to chris for just a second.
Speaker 4I hear alan, who's already in matt's room and chris had gotten him off the bed to try something. Cpr, whatever. Um and I always say this, but I have to alan was making sounds that were not human. He was crying like a puppy.
Speaker 4He was crying like an animal and I just went, I know it was like. So I go in there and I just I see Matt on the ground and Alan's like whimpering next to him and then he says here, he's still warm, so his torso was still warm. And he says you know? He says I can't believe. You know, he's like we're in shock. But then I start praying to the Lord and I said, god, I know you can bring Matthew back, so if you want me to, I will call him back into his body.
Speaker 2And, oh my God.
Speaker 4And I heard God. He said that's just his earthly body, he's with me, wow.
Speaker 3So I was like okay and so I said it out. Loud.
Speaker 4I said matt's with the lord. This is just his earthly body. He's with them, and so that helped us a little bit.
Speaker 2My god, you heard from god?
Speaker 4oh yeah, so clearly peace and comfort yeah, and just know that matt was with the lord. Yeah, so he he just died of respiratory failure. His, you know, he stopped breathing because um two of the medicines were um counteracted each other. Correct and and bad mix and when we got the um toxicology yeah, it said he didn't take a lethal dose, but because his lungs were so sick it became like a bad cocktail.
Speaker 4And so we went downstairs and the police are asking us questions like what do you think happened, do you think he took his life? And we're like no, we don't think he did. And all this stuff. And then Chris, you know, poor kid, he's like he saw it all. So within like gosh minutes, all his friends start showing up. Oh wow, for like four hours.
Speaker 1Matthew or Chris's, both, but mostly Matt's.
Speaker 4Yeah, for hours, you know, and they let his body stay with us for four hours, what yeah? Which was really awesome. So all these friends got to come over and say bye to him and whoever wanted to actually see him, they did. And so I'm an hour and a half into this I'm telling the lord they don't do that normally, correct I said, lord, I know, I know matt's with you.
Speaker 4I said I can't believe he's in heaven and I'm like I don't know what to do. And he goes. I want you to start worshiping me, I know, oh my god I never I never heard him say that before. I'm like, okay, well, two days before this I had fallen in love with mercy me's. I can only imagine it had been out for two months and I'm like one of the best songs absolutely so I go to one christian bookstore.
Speaker 4I can't find the cassette, so I go to another one. It's the last one, so I have it in my car and I said okay, okay. So I go to my car and a policeman's following me like what are you doing? Are you going to take off. I go no, no, no, I just need this worship CD and I bring it into the house and I put it in our player. Are you kidding?
Speaker 2me you're in the home with all these people and you're.
Speaker 4Yeah, because the Lord knows something, and so I put it in and I just start raising my hands and I start worshiping too. I can only imagine.
Speaker 3And.
Speaker 4Alan comes alongside me and puts his hands around me and he's kind of trying to do the same thing.
Speaker 3Oh my God, Because he doesn't?
Speaker 4really do that at that time, and the peace that passes understanding fell on me.
Speaker 3Wow.
Speaker 4And it felt like a warm blanket. And I always say, if we could pay a trillion gazillion dollars for this, we would, because it was the most precious peaceful ascending feeling you could ever imagine and every little part of what was going on was still so real. But the peace made it like bearable.
Speaker 2Star, as you're sharing this, I'm looking at me and dad and I'm like we're a mess, we're a wreck, but I'm looking at you and how you're sharing this with such strength and from a place of being healed yes, and not at a place where you're a wreck and this is sent you off a track to what it could have, amen, and how you and al could have. And how you and Al could have Exactly.
Speaker 2And this could have totally that's a really good point, but none of it happened because God and your obedience to him, in that very moment, I know, brought this healing in Jesus into that house.
Speaker 4Yeah, it literally did. And, honestly, rowdydy, I thought everybody was feeling what I was feeling because it was so tangible and I was like, oh okay, like it's bearable it still hurts, but it's bearable yeah but, and now he said he felt maybe a tinge of it, but I'm the one that you're talking about the warm blanket and the peace of God.
Speaker 4Oh my gosh, Just that divine, supernatural experience, and it lasted for two months, wow. So God just knew I needed it, because nine months before one of his best friends died in a motorcycle accident.
Speaker 2Matthew.
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 2Jesus.
Speaker 4And his mom was a wreck. And I told my boys I sat him down, him down. I said if you guys ever die on me, I'm gonna be just like that mom. So I made a vow without knowing it, the lord protected me. He broke the power of that vow when he said to see you respond in that way.
Speaker 2To know you're going to be okay, you're going to be strong.
Speaker 1Because I get the feeling in your household you're probably the rock you know what I mean. In some ways, and so when the rock is steady, everybody knows it's going to be okay. Yeah, this sucks and this hurts and all those other things, but she's not freaking out. So I'm not gonna freak out, because if she freaks out, then it's time to freak out.
Speaker 4Well, you know it ushered in the presence of the lord in a different way than we can, even we. I didn't even know we needed it, but god knew we needed god knew and in fact it was so calm in that respect, um eddie, that when alan's best friend flew in that evening to be with us and to help us with the funeral stuff, he told me because, by the grace of God, matthew's body was released the very next day, the 22nd, to the mortuary of December.
Speaker 2And it happened right around Christmas, and then we had his service Christmas Eve morning.
Speaker 4The 24th the morning at Christ Life Church, which that's a whole other amazing, incredible story. That Pastor Rome and his wife Sharon and they were supposed to go on a trip. They showed up at our door that night and they said we're going to delay our trip to Idaho for Christmas until we get this. So we had 500 people showed up at matt's celebration of life um the 24th the morning. But alan's best friend and he meant this well he said start he said people think you're in denial because you're so calm he goes, are you okay?
Speaker 4and I said thank you for telling me, duane. I said I didn't realize it was coming across that way he goes, so I told him what happened, yeah oh, you told him about all this peace that passed yeah, and I, I and he was like, okay, okay, I go.
Speaker 4I am very aware matt's gone, I'm very aware of how horrific this is, but god has given me this peace. Do you know about 15 years later he had a medical procedure in his heart and when he started to go into the operating room where they were going to do this procedure, he had a panic attack and he cried out to Jesus and that peace came on him. And so when he called me later, he was crying. He said Star, I now know what you were talking about, Because he experienced it.
Speaker 3There's no way to describe it it's supernatural.
Speaker 2You can't argue someone's testimony of their experience Correct Of how God shows up in their life. That's why we love these things, Because I can't sit here and say you're such a liar. All this is real and it it happened and it's so personal.
Speaker 4Yeah, my God, it was tough, I promise you, but he helped.
Speaker 2I think, just God telling you that he's with me and I've got him. It's like okay.
Speaker 4The mom was like.
Speaker 2oh, thank you, All right.
Speaker 1So when my mom like two weeks before my mom passed away, I went over to her house and she said eddie, I made my peace with god, I'm ready to go. You know what I mean? Yeah, and so when she went, I didn't, it didn't bother me, it really didn't, you know what I mean. And I didn't cry, I didn't do nothing because I knew in my heart what she told me.
Speaker 2Yeah, I thought he was going through that where he wasn't feeling, and he wasn't the only moment I cried Dude, there's no emotions, bro, sure.
Speaker 1The only moment I cried is when we went to go throw her ashes and they handed me a bag. And in that moment it was like such a beautiful life that this bag of ashes that moment I cried. I didn't cry because she was gone. I didn't cry because she died. I know where she's at. She told me I made my peace with God and I'm ready to go.
Speaker 3That's awesome.
Speaker 1And to know that was like I'm weird when it comes to death.
Speaker 2I'm probably not the person to come talk to. He's not the right guy If you're looking for love.
Speaker 1Because, I have through that moment. I have a very clear understanding I totally understand death is not the end. If we're truly in christ jesus, it's just a transition period.
Speaker 1You know, and so I see a lot of people that are like, when, when someone dies and they they're professing christians, they understand that this person is going to be in heaven. But what am I going to do? Right? And it becomes personal, it becomes about them and it's like, okay, I get that. I know you just lost somebody that was dear to you, but it's also like they're no longer in pain, they're no longer suffering, they've received their healing and they're walking with the lord in heaven. What do you have to be upset about?
Speaker 4exactly. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1I'm just like you, eddie, and I'm like, so I'm not the one to come talk to when you lose?
Speaker 4I'm really not either. I get it. I I'm too matter of fact about it, like, yeah, I am too, because it is a matter of fact it is reality.
Speaker 1Yes, that death is. Yes, it sucks, but where is? But it's never the end and death.
Speaker 4Where is your? It sucks, but where is the sting? But it's never the end and death. Where is your sting?
Speaker 1Exactly, it's gone when you know, but too many people get selfish when someone dies and they want to make it about them and it's like and I get that I understand your feelings a certain way, but in reality, should we not rejoice for what they received, Because they received their healing and're they're pain-free, they're no longer sick.
Speaker 4Cancer's lost its grip you know, I mean all these different things and it's right, I'm right there with you. I feel like pastors like pastor dave has done an excellent job of helping people understand that transition, oh yeah and that it really is. It's just like we get. We get to go on home, we we're just moving to another location. Do you remember the message he did?
Speaker 1where he did this timeline and he was talking about okay, we're here, we know that God is here, but he's also here.
Speaker 4Oh yeah.
Speaker 1And so, as he's walking through this timeline, he says but if you don't receive your healing here before you cross over into eternity and you receive it here, as god not still good still is, you know what I mean. And so, in that construct of thinking which is right along with me, is that, even because god made it very clear to me, I heal in three ways. I heal through the miraculous, which is someone laying hands on you and you miraculously get healed. I use medication, so some people get medications, surgeries, whatever it is, and he heals them. The third one, no one wants to accept he heals through death.
Speaker 2And that is death. Yeah, he brings us. I get it, we go home.
Speaker 4I agree with you.
Speaker 1People want the first two. They don't ever want the third one. Well, there's healing in death. Absolutely, because this thing that is made of dirt goes back to dirt. Our soul transfers over into eternity and we're healed. I agree with that. You know what?
Speaker 2I mean To be absent in body is to be present with the Lord.
Speaker 4Amen, and we are not meant to live. I mean, maybe we could have lived as long as Methuselah, but at the same time it's like we're not going to live that long.
Speaker 1That's a reality.
Speaker 4And we are still living. We're just moved home yeah, to heaven. I, I'm like you, I'm too. Matter of fact about it.
Speaker 1I don't fear death. I don't want to die. Okay, I want to live till I'm 85, 90, whatever, but I'm I don't fear it yeah it's not like I don't know amen, yeah, it's not something to fear, man, yeah, yeah so then, yeah, how?
Speaker 2what did you guys do?
Speaker 4well, by the grace of god, instead of alan running from god, he ran to god, so that he's been on this amazing journey ever since. Yeah, and you know my mom the very next day she, because she's my spiritual mentor. My mom is my spiritual mentor. I mean, I have another spiritual mentor as pastor shie. I've been surrounded by incredible men and women of God, women that have just spoken and put things in my heart and life that are priceless. But my mom is number one and she always has visions and she has encounters and things like that.
Speaker 2She comes up to me often and tells me things about God. It's me. I'm like I love when you do this for me and we sit up and listen. Yeah.
Speaker 4But she came the next day and she said the Lord wants me to take care of Chris. So he was, you know, 17. She went up to his bedroom and she said when this was happening, jesus is right here. And the Lord had her describe the vision to him and of how Matt had passed. And the Lord scooped him up and then Matt's body went away. But he turned to Chris and hugged him and so the Lord was trying to heal Chris at the time yeah.
Speaker 4So fast forward, you know, all these years later, Chris goes off to Bible college.
Speaker 3Oh nice he graduated from 2000,.
Speaker 4From high school, Desert Vista High School in 2003.
Speaker 2When did this thing with Matt happen? December?
Speaker 421st of 2001, the same year as 9-11.
Speaker 2Yeah. Three months after 9-11 so two years later, he graduates high school and goes off to bible college uh wheaton bible college this is crazy starved. This very well could have been a. It was a a why in chris and al's life? Yeah, and this thing very well could have been the absolute worst thing to happen to the. I mean it, it is it. It is but their response directory that they could have went because of it yeah it literally.
Speaker 2Instead of sending them off the wrong way, god used this thing to send them off god was able to bring them closer to him yeah, and and there was a lot of prayer.
Speaker 4I just have to say there was so much prayer involved in that healing process to help all of us Right.
Speaker 2Them not blaming.
Speaker 4God.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3Getting mad at God.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah, wow In fact, chris, he has wonderful good friends and he started going to a Baptist church because it was just down the road in Ahwatukee. And and he started going to a Baptist church because it was just down the road in Ahwatukee. And they're so full of the word right.
Speaker 4So we got more full of the word. Then he goes to this Wheaton Bible College in Chicago for four years and one of our backyard neighbors in this neighborhood, Ahwatukee, where we used to live their daughter also went there. Chris and Katie do not remember each other at all, as little kids they meet wheaton fall in love. Oh, they get married wow yeah, so wow, yeah, and so chris, our son is a hydrogeologist, so he got his, I know something with water, water and okay, rocks mining rocks through the earth.
Speaker 4I love that, yeah and so, uh, they got married and they moved to peru a number of years, like six, seven years.
Speaker 1He's a glorified rock washer.
Speaker 4And mining for gold, things like that.
Speaker 3He's a glorified rock washer there you go.
Speaker 1I like that. I like that. I love Gold Rush on Discovery, I think it's called.
Speaker 3Yeah, okay, I love that.
Speaker 4So Discovery I think it's called yeah.
Speaker 3Okay, I love that.
Speaker 4So while they were living in Peru we would try to visit them as often as we could. You know we were going to. We started going to Christ Life for a few years and then, when Pastor Rome was promoted to heaven and Pastor Dave stepped in at Christ Life, we got to know Pastor Dave and Cherie.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4So we met them in February of 2004.
Speaker 2Wow, cherie.
Speaker 4So we met them in February of 2004.
Speaker 2Oh wow, and they showed up.
Speaker 4Yeah, and so they are still exactly who you see. They are not any different.
Speaker 2It's been 21 years and this is pastor Dave and Cherie.
Speaker 4This is and they're just so we love them so much Like pastor Jim Rome was Alan's first pastor because, you know, he, he and his wife stayed for what was going on. Then we attended their church for two and a half years and then he was promoted Wow. And then Pastor Dave stepped in and Pastor Sri, you know, filled in also, and so that was his second pastor, like Pastor Jim Rome was Alan's first, and so, anyway, he's had some very classy mighty men of God, incredible, full of integrity character.
Speaker 2So, good so true.
Speaker 3Man of wisdom, yeah.
Speaker 4So then, when they stepped out of that position at Christ Life Church and started LifeLink, well, I knew right away we were going to be part of LifeLink.
Speaker 2Were you part of the group that was still at Christ Life and was like where'd he go? Where'd he go? Yes, but then you heard oh wait, they started, let's go Well we knew because we were actually already in fellowship.
Speaker 4So they were starting the home churches and we were already connected.
Speaker 1But I had Were you there on Super Bowl Sunday.
Speaker 2Yes, wow, you were. Were you there on Super Bowl Sunday? Yes, wow, you are literally an original. You know what I did. You're an OG man where the vision came forth.
Speaker 4What does OG stand for again?
Speaker 1Original gangster oh.
Speaker 4God.
Speaker 3Sorry.
Speaker 4Old group I don't know what that's called.
Speaker 1You're part of the old girls club, that's it.
Speaker 4So yeah, we were there. We were there. I don't think people, you're part of the old girls club, you're an original. We were there, I don't think people that come.
Speaker 2People show up on Sunday Star at this beautiful building and this beautiful church and all we do. They don't understand where we came from and how we started.
Speaker 1I don't think they understand our pastors. And just the genuine yeah, thank you for them. That they are the dedication, just the genuine yeah, thank you for that.
Speaker 4They are the dedication, the loyalty. Everybody that I know that knows them intimately.
Speaker 1Yeah, and I use that word specifically because not everybody has an intimate relationship with Pastor. Damon and Cherie, that's right, they all say the same thing. It's the same dude behind the door that is on stage, that is at a home, that is in a meeting, that is at a lunch appointment, the dude is the same, no matter where he's at who he's in front of
Speaker 4or who's around.
Speaker 1To me that is, that's special.
Speaker 4And it's solid.
Speaker 2It's something that we as people can follow, correct, as he's following God and he's imitating Jesus. That's a man that we can actually take his direction and take his counsel and listen to him and apply it to our life and know that we're going to be good listening and following.
Speaker 1There are a lot of professing Christians, myself included, who are one way at church or another way at home or another way.
Speaker 2We're in process bud, I'm included.
Speaker 3I'm included. We are in process. I still get around the guys Sure sure sure Say some things we shouldn't.
Speaker 1I love.
Speaker 2Jesus, I just cuss a little, but I'm getting better.
Speaker 4I have that towel, by the way, but I'm getting better at trying to be consistent in who I am you guys are hilarious, but I'm trying to get better at being consistent in who I am in different environments.
Speaker 1I want people to see the same person at all times really good, dad, and honestly, the only way we can do that is with holy spirit's help, I'm not even kidding who you see here has been transformed so many times through all this fire but to hear your pastor is that way. It's encouraging that we can be that way and we should strive to be like that.
Speaker 4And we met them in their 30s. Okay, we met them in their 30s. We were in our early 40s. They were in their whatever 30s.
Speaker 2They didn't even know what they were doing Seriously At that point, coming out of what they were coming out, because we've heard Pastor Cherie's testimony. We We've heard Pastor Cherie's testimony, we've heard Jan's and we've heard Pastor Lacey's. We've got all the different perspectives of them starting LifeLink Church. You're looking for some testimonies to go and listen to. Go check out Pastor Lacey, go check out Pastor Cherie, go check out Mama Jan's testimony. You'll hear all the whys and the crazy hell that they had to go through.
Speaker 4It's insane, and I don't think it's has slowed down too much, actually, but they're just so taking territory from the enemy. Yeah, I'm so. Yeah, we adore them, we love them, we are so grateful for them. I mean, I, honestly, I, I don't want us to sound like I have them on a pedestal because I know better yeah and they are the best people to say yes, and we're not perfect.
Speaker 4But talk about an example living the example. So, but yeah, we've been with them ever since, and so this has been our church since 2006. And so Wow.
Speaker 2I see why.
Speaker 4Now I see why you have the access, yeah, and the relationship, and the relationship. You're right, yeah.
Speaker 2Because you know how hard it is to find faithful people. Sure. Well, you know how hard it is, and then they stay, yeah, and they stick around, oh yeah, because nobody's perfect. No, but people are people, man, and it just God.
Speaker 1Yeah, thank you for saying that People get hurt and offended. People get hurt and offended, sure.
Speaker 4Sure, and we have. We're not perfect, ellen and I. We've had, we've seen some things and heard some things, and we get hurt too by different things that have happened.
Speaker 2It's real.
Speaker 4And we've made our mistakes, but we are. This is our church. God is going to need three bolts of lightning to kick us out of here. There's just no way.
The Ministry of Holy Hugs and Speaking Life
Speaker 1Picture your house growing up, right, yeah, you, your brothers, mom and dad, right? I'm sure there were times when you were like, oh, I hate this family, I want to leave. You know what I mean. I was that way, you know what I mean. But when you find church family, when you find family, that is church. It's the same way. There's going to be times where you don't like a person or you don't like a message, or it hits you wrong.
Speaker 1And offense comes, that's no reason to just run to the next church. You know what I mean. Around here we call them courageous conversations.
Speaker 2Got to have them.
Speaker 1If something was said that you don't like, or a pastor's preached a message that you're not too sure about, go ask him Go talk to him.
Speaker 2He would love it, love it, love it than to explain the message. That was just you know what I mean he would. It's literally one of the reasons why he goes to the porch so that he can talk with people. But very few people that are offended or hurt from stuff like that actually have the courageous conversation to receive a healing, but we have to use our words.
Speaker 1Yeah, if you just run to the next church. You're bringing offense with you and now you're looking for something to be offended about, because now you go there, hurt and you never really gonna find that place again because, you never took care of that offense or went, had a conversation.
Speaker 1That was there. So you go to this new church offended and you're just waiting for pastor to say something. You know what I mean. And you never really find a settled place where, if you just go have that conversation, let him explain to you what he meant by his preaching, sure maybe you'll be like, oh yeah, my, through my lens of hurt and offense. I saw and heard this and now I understand what you're talking yeah, we have our own filters, our own lens. You're exactly right. Life experience gives us that.
Speaker 4Well, so you know, since we've been here since from the very beginning, we know countless people that have come through and we still run into them and we still hug and love each other. And you know we're all, and Pastor Davin Street know that too. They're like especially Alan. He'll take pictures and send it to them. Like look who we ran into that used to go to church 10 years ago, but it's yeah because we're all part of it Exactly we're still family, we are and.
Speaker 1I love about them is they're like this with people so good.
Speaker 2It's never. Oh, sting Open palms bud. Yeah, we don't, it's this.
Speaker 1This was the first. I mean, I haven't been to a lot of churches so I can't really say that I have been. But this is the first church I've ever been to that I heard a pastor say if you don't feel like this is your home, let me know. I know a lot of pastors in the area. I would love to find the place that you belong.
Speaker 4Isn't that amazing.
Speaker 1To me, that's not about filling a seat.
Speaker 2That's right. It's not numbers, it's about you finding your, that you're supposed to be, and that's where I want to get you?
Speaker 2yeah, that says more than anything else, so I feel like I have to share this with you. Yeah, I was over. I was up the mountain one time, uh, with the old pastor that I was with in the old ministry I was from. And this lady comes in talking to her husband and she tells him you gotta plant your flag somewhere. You gotta plant your flag for 10 years. And watch what god. And I'm looking at this lady's eyes when she says this to her husband and I see God and I hear God in this lady. I'm like, oh wow, I go home and tell dad that I'm like dad, this lady, and tell her a situation.
Speaker 2And she says you got to plant your flag somewhere for 10 years and watch what God will do. And I and you got to plant your flag somewhere for 10 years and watch what God will do. And we're actually in this season where I had just come out of rehab and we're going to LifeLink, we're going to Mesa East Foursquare, we're going to Living Word in Mesa Three different churches on Sundays, we got a homeless ministry and a food bank we're doing and all this stuff, dude. And mom says I think we need to go back to lifelink. And when she said it I was like I think so too. So we came back. Okay, she hasn't yet yeah yet.
Speaker 2Yeah, but this, this thing of planting our flag. When we decided to come back here, me and dad are like all right, dude, we are gonna plant our flag. And when we decided to come back here, me and dad are like all right, dude, we are going to plant our flag and this is home.
Speaker 1When he came home and shared that, I'm like I'm taking that for my own. Okay, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4Because you guys came back together.
Speaker 1Well because when you hear a word like that, it's not just for, it wasn't just for her husband Come to hear it, so he could come home and share it, so we could grab the vision of hey, we need to plant ourselves, plant somewhere and find home, because we, as addicts and people who do what we want to do, we ah, we're done here, let's go find the next place.
Speaker 2Yeah, you know what I mean? Never have planted a flag and this is home. But you heard god, yeah. And when you hear god and dude, look what's happened in five years, bro, it's been five years already 2025, baby, oh Lord, pray for us. We love it Slow down. Time flies, bud Slow down.
Speaker 4Time flies. Don't follow that 10-year limit. No, no, no.
Speaker 2It was just what I needed to hear, because this is the best thing. I'm literally living the best life I've ever lived. I'm doing the best I've ever done. I'm thriving in ways I've never thrived before, all because of God and me finding home, a church home, planning myself, letting roots develop, letting people in, developing relationships, going to life groups, serving.
Speaker 1It's different. Prior to that message, we were just going to church. Okay, hello somebody. Yeah, it wasn't like oh, this is our church, we're just going to church, this is where we go to church, you know I mean we go to church here too, and we go to church there too, you know I mean.
Speaker 1So it was this. We were spreading seed all over the place. You know I mean when god's word clearly says plant yourself next to a river of living waters you, you know what I mean and let your roots grow deep and they'll stay refreshed. You know what I mean. And in doing that, the tree has begun to blossom, the fruit has begun to take place. You know what I mean. If you keep taking a plant, like the one message Pastor Shreed did when she kept pulling the poor orange plant.
Speaker 1Yeah, nothing ever gets grown, it's true, it's real, it's true, I know. So quit going to church.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 1Plant yourself somewhere at a church home and invest yourself.
Speaker 2Start serving. Invest your time, invest into the people. Start doing something.
Speaker 1Because I know people who come to this church just as long as almost as long as I have and they're like I don't have the same relationship you have with them. Yeah, you're not in a life group.
Speaker 4I've never, seen you in a life group or serving or going to people.
Speaker 1You show up five minutes before church starts and as soon as church is over, you run out the door.
Speaker 2Run out the doors.
Speaker 1And then you wonder why I have relationships, because I'm here three, four times a week. You know what I mean. I'm doing things. I'm part of life groups, I'm in CR, I serve at my church, I go up the hill at men's retreats.
Speaker 2I do all these different things?
Speaker 1So yeah, of course I have more relationships than you do, because I'm invested, correct, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2Correct, you got to pour in in order to. I hate to say it this way, but it really you get what you get what you put. You get out of what you put into.
Speaker 4You have to it has to be that way.
Speaker 2It's a sowing and a reaping. Exactly it's a biblical, it's kingdom. You can't come and just sit and expect to get.
Speaker 4Yeah Well, I don't know if you know this, but when LifeLink started yeah well, I don't know if you know this, but when lifelink started, pastor david shree um asked us if they could use our home for different things. So they, they did certain things at our house, had a few pastoral retreats there nice they had um where you guys living, where you are now.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, you have a beautiful home.
Speaker 4You guys are blessed thank you, and and it was all I was I heard the lord say about that house because I was a realtor and I was the one that saw it. I was like the Lord said I want you to live here. So and he actually told me I've been waiting for you when I walked into the house, it was so cool. And then I saw Matthew 6, 33, seek you first the kingdom of God, hallelujah.
Speaker 2On the ceiling in this foyer part, so I was like Like spiritually. So I was like like spiritually you saw it because it wasn't there yeah, but spiritually, yeah, thank you so but we were, so they would call it fellowship hall number two.
Speaker 3I love that, yeah, few weddings, you know different things at our house, which was so fun.
Speaker 4So yeah, we've been, like you're saying, invested and we just love our church. We love our church family, like Alan's going's going, we can't. We can't just be at queen creek campus because we'll miss the people at gilbert campus. We've got to go back and forth. I go absolutely because you know it's not the same it's a real thing.
Speaker 2It's a real. People are like I'm gonna miss you rowdy. I'm like dude, I'm setting up and serving out there.
Speaker 1It's a lot, so it's a lot so in this season that's coming up, I and I'm thankful I was mad at first that they were going to keep it at 4 o'clock.
Speaker 2I love you Dad.
Speaker 1But then I'm like, okay, wait a minute.
Speaker 2Trust our pastor. He hears from God.
Speaker 1We don't start setting up until 11. Church service starts here at 10. I could literally still get here at 930. See your people, see the people.
Speaker 2Catch a little bit of worship.
Speaker 1Leave at 10, 30 and get out there, get out there by 11, yeah, and and still have time to set up and do all those things. Because I have the same thing. I'm like there's people that are going to be at this church who, just in the weeks that we're out in queen creek, are like, man, we miss you guys, yeah, when we come back they're like ah, jesus, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1And it's like so in my mind. I'm like, okay, those connections are important, they matter, that's right. You know what I mean, that's right. And there are people that I minister to on a Sunday morning, yes, sir, Just by being their friend and loving on them and giving them hugs, but that they still need that. So if I got to sacrifice myself to get here a little earlier to spend a little bit of time with those guys and maybe not every Sunday, but definitely do it on.
Speaker 2Whenever you get that itch, let me know, but I'll ride with you, dude because I want to do that. It's real because there are there are.
Speaker 1There are men that I've invested many, many, many hugs in that I don't want to stop ministering to their soul and their spirit through my hugs.
Speaker 2You know how hard it is to get a man to hug For real. And now there's men in this place that literally look for him like where's my hug, dude? Because sometimes you want to let go and he don't let it. And he's like nope, come here.
Speaker 1Human touch is so healing, there's something to me there's something amazing, because for me it was a man who did it. For me. There was a man when I first got out of prison who, uh, still dealing with some issues through prison lifestyles that I had that found. He was a big, tall guy, head above everybody else, and he would see me walk into Mountain View Church and I could see his head coming through the crowd.
Speaker 4Right for you and he would come give me a hug.
Speaker 1Right for dad, he would come give me a hug and at first it was like oh, what are you doing, dude?
Speaker 2Why are you hugging me, man? But?
Speaker 1literally Star, I'm not even kidding man. By week, four or five or six I started to like where's he at man?
Speaker 3I want my hug. I need that hug. I want my hug Because I felt things breaking off of me.
Speaker 1Yes, I'm not even kidding.
Speaker 4I know, I understand.
Speaker 1There were things in my heart.
Speaker 4I can see that there were things in my heart. I can see that there were things in my heart that were beginning to break off of me.
Speaker 2Sure sure, Just through a hug yeah.
Speaker 4Oh I know Okay.
Speaker 1Yeah, you have to share, bud. Please don't take this the wrong way.
Speaker 2I'm not saying anything.
Speaker 1No, I was a white guy. This was a big black guy.
Speaker 3Sure yes Through prison.
Speaker 1Through things like that, you're taught to be separated Separated. So, as this big black man would come and begin to hug me, I felt that begin to break off of me to where I was, like I don't know what this guy is.
Speaker 3And we began to make phone calls.
Speaker 1He began to get your number and he would call me and minister to me, and through all these things whatever the world put in, my heart was leaving.
Speaker 2Yes, just through a hug.
Speaker 1His name was Derek. I'll always forget him.
Speaker 3Through a hug.
Speaker 1I'll always remember him. The dude changed things that the world taught me to believe and feel Right. And so when I came here, it was the same way I felt the first time. I hugged a guy and I felt him go to pull away and I said I'm not, and I even whispered, I'm not done yet. And you can feel this.
Speaker 1They, they settle into it and they're like there was, there's literally this, this like tenseness and you can feel the tenseness leave and they would kind of fall into you and it was, I don't know. God uses hugs to heal people and so I did, and so I did research.
Speaker 4Okay, okay, the human touch. Oh, hug Hug.
Speaker 2Specifically the hug and the length of a hug.
Speaker 1I think it's a 20, 30-second hug.
Speaker 2In a matter of a 20, 30-second hug.
Speaker 1No there's different ones, anxiety begins to leave.
Speaker 2There's like a three-second, like a seven. The compression begins to leave.
Speaker 1The blood pressure begins to lower. Lower my gosh. There's healing that takes place in a hug. I believe it, and so God made it very clear. That's your ministry. I love it. I don't know why people see me and they see this tattooed burly. One lady I met even described me as this hairy man. You know what I mean, you look scary. But when this burly tattooed guy hugs you and doesn't let go, things happen.
Speaker 2Now I literally have men who come and seek me out and give me a hug, dude they hug me gosh and there's times that I want to let go and they don't.
Speaker 4Yeah, and I'm like, oh, thank you, man thanks, man, you know what I mean I'd love to see what that looks like in the spirit, because I've seen things in the spirit and I know there's a transfer. There's a transfer that takes place, there's a transfer.
Speaker 1That takes place. Okay, there's energy there's spiritually, things like that that take place. Okay, if you come in and you're bearing a burden and I'm and I hug you, I'm now absorbing some of that burden onto myself through the energy that is being transferred through this hug Spiritually. What I have inside of me is now being transferred to you spiritually. So, while your body is releasing its tension into mine, mine is releasing spiritual joy and bliss into you. You know what I mean. And so there's this transfer that takes place. They don't know it.
Speaker 1They just know I needed that and that felt really good. You know what I mean. And so there's this transfer that takes place. Yeah, they don't know it right, they just know I needed that and that felt really good. Yeah, you know what I mean, and so it's beautiful buddy soul therapy it is so good that's beautiful I love it.
Speaker 4Thank you for sharing that of course super cool.
Speaker 1Yeah, it changes everything, it does yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2so we've got. We've got a lot from you, star my God, hold on a second. I want to say something too, come on.
Speaker 1So I need to thank you as well, because there was a time when I first started coming here that I don't know what the hell you ever saw in me, but you started calling me mighty man of God and you started sharing these uh prayer things with me. Uh, pray these things out loud. You know what I mean, and just you encouraging me like that, and just you always had a smile and a positive word for me and I'm praying for you, I'm praying for your wife, and just always that. I thank you for that, because those things I I didn't see in myself or think of myself in those ways. And so for somebody like Pastor Tom or like yourself to speak things like that and to call it out.
Speaker 1So keep doing that. The people that you don't know, and you see them, and God prompts you to do that.
Speaker 1You have no idea what that does for someone Because it changed a lot inside of me because I began to believe what you were professing, mighty man of God, I'm like. First it was like why the hell does she keep calling me that? You know what I mean? It's real. But then it turns into it's real, okay, maybe I am, you know what I mean. And so I began to believe those things because we believe what's spoken over us. Exactly. If we're told we're worthless a lot.
Speaker 2We're going to believe that we're worthless. You ain't never going to amount to nothing, Right?
Speaker 1But when we begin to speak things like that over people, hey, mighty man of God, and he'll tell you too. There was a guy that came.
Speaker 2I think it was Pastor Holmes came to Teen Challenge at me, man of god, I was like yeah, coming out. But then I believed it. I started to yeah.
Speaker 1I was like right, I am one, yeah, so thank you for that man I want to I never had an opportunity to thank you, and I want to thank you for that, because those words really did open my eyes to what I could be, and you are.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah what were you were destined to be. Seriously, one of my favorite psalms is Psalms 139-16. I've been saying it several times over the last few months for various reasons, but it's the one where it says that you know. It talks about God knowing us before we were in our mother's womb Intimately. And that even before our first day of life, he had written about us in his books. Yes, everything yeah, that was to be and so it's like it's already destined.
Speaker 4Yeah, you're, you are you are mighty men of god and he sees when you ask him to help us see others the way he does. He'll let you see that, and it doesn't matter what any person's story is right that to see him, see him the way Jesus and God and Holy Spirit sees him, is profound. He's such a profoundly good God anyway, and.
Speaker 4Father and so it's so easy to speak life. I love the name of your ministry because it is a mindset, it's a heart set, it's powerful, it's biblical, it's spiritual, everything about this. What's it say about prophecy? It's powerful, it's biblical, it's spiritual, everything about this what's it say about prophecy?
Speaker 2what's it say? It says out of all the gifts, out of the one that you should prophecy, and that's really what speaking life is it's the, it's prophetic love it the toby mac song speak life.
Speaker 1I love the way he talks about how we could change a life through the words that we speak. Come on, buddy, you know what I mean, and could you imagine somebody who's been talked down to all their lives on drugs and somebody who they've never met comes up and just like God's?
Speaker 2got a purpose for you. God's got a plan and a purpose for your life. He's got a plan for your life. He's like what.
Speaker 1Sorry for the things that happened to you, man, but God loves you and they're like what?
Speaker 3Yeah sounds like a foreign language.
Speaker 1They're like me. You know what I mean, yeah. But then you see him again and you're like man of God, brother, oh man, god's got you know. And then it breaks the cycle of the thought process of I'm not worth anything. You know what I mean, and it may take time, but eventually over enough time they're going to begin to think man, maybe there's something different for me.
Speaker 1That's a new recording for them to listen to. And if we have the power to do that for somebody, that's a new recording for them to listen to. And if we have the power to do that for somebody, how selfish can we be to already throw coals?
Speaker 4on someone who is down Right right, oh my gosh. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1Yeah, I tell people all the time people that you meet on the street. They don't need you to tell them. Oh, you're a sinner.
Speaker 2You shouldn't be doing that. You're a sinner and a drug addict Get your life together.
Speaker 4You don't think they don't know that they know you never had that ministry happen to you. Like, did you have that happen to you?
Speaker 2When I was in addiction. Yeah, no. Oh, thank God right, no, hell and brimstone, stone fire, stuff. If they did, I laughed at them. Yeah, you know what I mean, because it doesn't change. No, no, no, it doesn't right, no no, wow, I know it's it.
Speaker 4It literally aligns up with the way the enemy operates.
Speaker 1It pushes people away, absolutely anything yeah, but yeah, the power of words I've never met somebody who comes to christ because someone told them they were a sinner and a drug addict and her life was useless yeah, I've known lots of people who come to the lord because somebody loved me when I didn't love myself. Somebody just kept speaking life over me when I saw no life in myself there you go and now the heaven is full of people because somebody choose to speak life.
Speaker 2It's one of the one of the things we say at celebrate recovery, specifically when I'm huddling with the leaders is guys, tonight when these people come in, we're going to love them back to life, because right now they're probably not loving themselves right. So that's our job to love these people back to life. That's what celebrate recovery does, man, because a lot of people are coming in broken right.
Speaker 3Coming in hurt.
Speaker 4They're coming in offended church hurt they're coming in all different, all stuff, man, and it's real. It's real stuff and be replaced, it can be exchanged you can have joy, amen.
Speaker 2You can dance, yeah, you can be free, you can be healed. You can walk in victory. It takes time and there's a process to it. There is, but while you're in that process and you're going through it, you just keep coming back and letting us love you back to life.
Speaker 4Yeah, amen. I know that the last couple months it's been on my heart to just pray for so many people that are lost or prodigals, and one of the areas God's having me pray is asking for his mercy and forgiveness. Like standing in the gap and asking for forgiveness because they know not what they do.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4Until they finally get that recording, that new voice, that new script in their head going no, you are something and you are destined for a purpose, that old script, the enemy lying and yelling at them is all they're hearing so they have to have that new script, but standing in the gap so his mercy can keep falling on them fresh every morning. That's really good, star Well he's having me pray that way right now, because there's so many people that are lost.
Speaker 2He's having me pray that way right now because there's so many people that are lost. So, sitting here, sis, we have your. We've seen, we've heard your faithfulness with God. We've seen well, we've seen his faithfulness with you. It's really what it is. He's so good and faithful, but we've experienced you hearing him. But we've experienced you hearing him.
Speaker 2We've experienced the Holy Spirit literally coming and comforting in a moment. Yeah, we hear how God brought you here to home at LifeLink. Is there anything in these past 19 or 20 years that you haven't shared that?
Speaker 4you feel like you want to share in your testimony. I was thinking about that. So Chris and Katie lived in Peru for six years or so and in 2012 they got pregnant in 2011, and they were going to have a baby in 2012,. April 5th Sorry, april 6th is when baby David was born, but it turns out there was a medical mistake and he only lived for 30 hours, oh wow. So Chris who?
Speaker 3found his brother then lost his firstborn son.
Speaker 2Oh wow, they don't have any other children yet.
Speaker 4They have his firstborn son oh wow. They don't have any other children yet. They have two amazing dogs, our grandpups. And now, I love dogs a lot yeah.
Speaker 2They're coming, yeah, they're coming. I'm believing for that.
Speaker 4Yeah, but I would say I wanted to add that because, as strong as the Lord made me and when he gave me that divine peace that ascends and passes understanding when Matthew died, I did not get that when baby David died and I had a weepiness that affected me for four months, wow, from actually into November of that year. So this is 2012. And when baby David was being born in Peru, he was born at a birthing clinic, oh, so you didn't even get a chance to see him. Excuse me so.
Speaker 3I actually did get to see him.
Speaker 4But what happened was um Katie, our daughter-in-law's mom and I were outside of this birthing clinic and we were praying and singing and we knew she was in labor and it was taking a long time. So we were just, you know, waiting for updates to find out how far along is she. You know how many centimeters all this stuff?
Speaker 4when is this baby going to be born? And we could kind of tell there was like an urgency to it, but we just kept praying and singing and and I was praying in tongues because I could and finally, when our, my son, chris, comes out at almost like quarter to five this it was a friday, april 6th he said good news, bad news, and he was putting his shirt on because he was he'd been in the water. It was one of those birthing water things.
Speaker 4And he said the baby is born, didn't know yet what he was and he said but he's not breathing. So we're like, well, can we come in and be with you guys? And he had accidentally locked himself out of the door. So the nurse and the doctor were trying to bring baby David back and doing mouth-to-mouth and a little breathing thing, and so finally we got let back into this clinic because he accidentally locked us out and Chris and Debbie, katie's mom, ran upstairs to be with Katie, but then the doctor lady upstairs to be with Katie, but then the doctor lady German lady doctor and the nurse run downstairs with him, baby David, and he's blue and she's giving him mouth to mouth and he turns pink, but then he turns blue because you know it's just for it's momentary.
Speaker 4And so we go off running to the hospital, which is a few blocks away, and we have to go to the car parking garage, and so you can imagine there was a lot of emotion, there was a lot of praying, I was a little bit of frantic crying, but also like this baby's got to live. This baby's got to live. So finally it's like by the time he gets into the hospital, the nurse carries him in and the right doctor gets hold of him and takes him to the NICU the baby NICU. It had been like almost half an hour and so they put him on a ventilator and he lived 30 hours and then he'd had a couple of heart attacks when he died, which was so heartbreaking. I actually took that harder than when Matthew died, wow, and part of it was because the peace that passes, understanding completely covered me. Yeah, you know, a couple hours after Matt's gone two hours, hour and a half, but not this time Wow, and also literally in my mind, I'm thinking God, I was doing everything I knew to do.
Speaker 4I was rebuking the enemy. I was declaring he will live and not die. I was doing everything I knew to do. I was rebuking the enemy. I was declaring he will live and not die. I was quoting verses, I was singing, I was being in a You're speaking in tongues, you're warring, all of it. And yet he didn't live and I was like what did I not?
Speaker 2do. That's a real one there. There's other people that go through that and loss. And what did I do wrong? What could I have done?
Speaker 4What was there left to do that I didn't do? And that's the only reason I'm bringing it up is because it is so real and here I felt like I was a mature Christian, been through so much, seen so many miracles, healings, powerful moves of God, visitations, encounters I see in the spirit, I hearations encounters. I see in the spirit, I hear in the spirit, I smell in the spirit. I mean there's a lot.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4I'm so thankful for that is on my journey with the Lord, and yet I see this second death.
Speaker 3Yeah, it was so profound.
Speaker 4It was profoundly sad.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4And I didn't have that peace and thankfully Alan had more of that peace than I did so he was actually the rock in that second time, but our son had a really rough time.
Speaker 4Both Chris and Katie had a really rough time from that yeah, and so for I was just I'd have a tear every couple days, I'd have tears, just I wasn't crying, crying, but I had like a weepiness and I was asking everybody under everybody that I knew was a prayer warrior, will you pray for me? Pray for me? And I asked pastor david, should you pray for me? Because I can't, I can't stop crying yeah and I. I guess I was having a sadness and a grief.
Speaker 4That was like a spiritual attack yeah but it's beyond like a healthy yeah so november of that year, I I'm having that moment at home and I said to the Lord, you've got to help me because I can't keep going on like this. And he said you have PTSD. And I said what I said how can I have PTSD? I wasn't in a bad car accident or I was in a war.
Speaker 2That's how I was Trauma, trauma. This is traumatic, it was traumatic what you went, trauma.
Speaker 4He said this is traumatic, it was traumatic what you went through.
Speaker 3And he said, and I'll heal you, and in two days it was gone Like forever gone.
Speaker 4I still have moments where I'll but, not like where it's uncontrollable.
Speaker 2And every day there's a tear falling down my face and it manifests physically.
Speaker 4Yeah, but I bring it up because I just want to say you know what god is still? Profoundly good. Yeah, yeah, he's a, he's a really good god yeah and he's such a loving god. And when bill johnson from bethel church lost his wife man from breast cancer, I watched the the service god she died july 13th, like three years, four years ago, and he preached on July 17th, which happens to be Pastor Day's birthday, and I listened to that sermon and he blew me away.
Speaker 2He talked about how you can only worship him on this side Exactly, even through that Exactly, and how much more that worship means.
Speaker 4God, it's so sincere and he says you don't know this side of God until you go through such suffering Like this is a side of God you will not experience until you go through certain things. Not because God won't try to reveal himself more in our journey with him, but there are these moments where you're just these experiences helpless.
Speaker 4You're completely. You want answers. You're not going to get these answers. You're. You're like I. I did everything that you asked me to do. What else was there left? And and then god showed me. You're just looking at the present. This, this dimension, says I'm way over there. I'm so far ahead of you and it's all covered. And he said you know I'll get you through this which he did, but I'm saying there's. That's what this life is about.
Speaker 3A journey with him.
Speaker 4And it's profoundly good, and it's also profoundly hard in various ways, but he never leaves us or forsakes us.
Speaker 2Everybody wants the blessings of God. Very few people want to go through the sufferings of Christ. Exactly, there's something in the baptism of sufferings that's so real.
Speaker 4Is it because we're knuckleheads?
Speaker 2We're human.
Speaker 4We don't know. We have to make the mistakes ourselves. One of the ways that God does what he does.
Speaker 2I forget where the scripture is but Jesus literally talks about a baptism, of suffering the baptism of suffering. I know and I'm like dude, did you know that was in there? I'm like what is this? I know you know what.
Speaker 3I mean.
Speaker 2Baptism of the Holy Spirit, baptism of the water.
Speaker 3Yeah, we hear about all these baptisms.
Speaker 1Baptism of suffering. Baptism of suffering, and it's in red Right. Yeah, I'm like what? Oh?
Speaker 4Jesus, I know.
Speaker 1Like dude.
Speaker 4And even then you're like well, what does that really mean? Until you go through it.
Speaker 2There's an anointing and something that God does in a suffering. If you go through it and you endure it on the other side, you come out stronger. Oh yeah, you come out closer to God. Yeah, Come out looking more like him. It's crazy.
Speaker 4And the if you go through it and come through it is all based on us literally leaning in, falling into his arms. Yeah, we can't do it on our own no. And I was trying to. I was thinking that same peace is going to come back on me, that same strength, you know. But there was something else I was going through and he had to help break it off of me. But I had to, like, I had to give into him, Like I had to get in his face.
Speaker 2That's real.
Speaker 1I know, but he also had to allow you to experience that, because, while he did cover you for your son, there was something that he needed to grow in you through this suffering moment.
Speaker 2To get you through it, to break you.
Speaker 1Because, like you just said, there's only something you can get in that moment of just complete brokenness, leaning into him.
Speaker 2You know what I mean. Yeah.
Speaker 1Because if we're always experiencing his goodness, we don't ever get to know how truly good he is, exactly until we're in the suffering you know what I mean. I do because it's a different goodness in the suffering than it is when life is just good exactly.
Speaker 4You know what I mean. It's easy to talk about if it's just good and there's highs and there's mountaintops think about someone being in recovery.
Speaker 1We hear testimonies where people are literally jesus like man, homeless on the streets, ready to die, and they have this moment of if you are god, you need to show up now because I'm done and something miraculous just takes place. And now they have this great, oh man, I don't even know what the word is just this great reverence for God, because when they were at their last moment. They called out and he answered. They called out and he was there.
Speaker 4And that's really what it comes down to. It's like it just takes us into a deeper connection. You feel his heartbeat, you feel his love. It wraps around you.
Speaker 1Read the Psalms of David Amen. Read the Psalms of David Amen. I've cried out. It's my despair, right? You know what I mean. Don't let me go, god. You know what I mean. People are literally having. Those are real moments that people have on earth. Yeah, you know what I mean. It's not just something cool. We read in the Bible.
Speaker 4Yeah, and you don't think it's going to happen to you, but this is. We're living in a fallen world, we are on this earth yeah, it happens.
Speaker 1I think the hardest thing for people to understand is that God is good all the time he really is no matter what life is going on around us, no matter who we may lose, no matter how deep in the dumps we think we really are, God is still good.
Speaker 4He's still good to us. He still loves us, right where we're at. He's still there faithful.
Speaker 3Yeah, we just can't give up.
Speaker 2We just can't quit.
Speaker 3That's what I was saying.
Speaker 2We can't give up. We can't give up Right, we can't stop. Amen, because that's the only us giving up and us quitting in life is the only thing that will but see. Even that god can, because in 2018 and 2019, when I thought I messed up god and went back into addiction and was shooting dope want take your hands off me I want to die quitting and giving up.
Speaker 2In that moment, god's like nope, I'm not gonna let you do this. You don't know what you're asking for right now. I'm gonna bring you through this, son. You're gonna come out better than you've ever been. Yeah, so it's like, even when we do quit and give up, yeah there are times where god will even get you through that. He will, man, and he's good, he's so good.
Speaker 4I'll tell you something, and it's one of those things, again, where I'm, I'm sure, only sharing this because we just don't fully understand the whys. Why did this happen this way? So, while we were still in Peru with Chris and Katie, this was like day three we're reading on our phones of an Argentina mom who had lost her baby girl and then, in her moment of grief, she busts into the morgue where they put her, she opens the, she finds her, opens the drawer and the baby girl's breathing she lived, so she was like born um forget what they call it stillborn yeah, yeah but she came back and I was like god, that's my miracle.
Speaker 4Why don't I have that story?
Speaker 1you didn't go bust into the morgue, did you no?
Speaker 4I was gonna say I wish I was gonna say yeah, that's.
Speaker 3Wouldn't that have been, but it was one of those things where you just go see you could have you did it for her. Why didn't you do it for me?
Speaker 2that's real, it's real and and yet, at the same time, it's like he there are going to be once we get before the king and we see this grand tapestry of all that he's done, we'll be like oh, oh oh, that's okay gotcha yeah, I mean honestly, we may not get to know all the answers, but in heaven it doesn't matter, we'll get reunited worshiping our king. Yeah, see david there. Amen, if our story is truly written.
Speaker 1Does it make a difference if it's 30 hours or 300?
Speaker 4years exactly I I hear you it's still his story yeah it still had a purpose yeah, he's in heaven, so we'll get to see him there and we'll get to spend eternity with him there, matt's an uncle in heaven. I love that.
Speaker 2That was the first thing, he's already holding him. David Matt's holding David, literally. I love that Wow. And they're sitting right next to Jesus.
Speaker 4I know, oh man. Yeah, chris said that Matt doesn't get to be an uncle. When Matthew passes, he's an uncle.
Speaker 2He, he's an uncle. He's an uncle, and he's got them in his hands. Oh man Star.
Speaker 4I know it's wild. Well, thank you for letting me share, guys.
Speaker 2Yeah of course, I want to know what you're hoping for in the future.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 2Because I know there's more there is, and I know, with this next season, you guys coming into with having some more time and some more availability, yeah, what are you guys hoping for, man? So what are you believing for?
Future Ministry Plans and Final Prayer
Speaker 4We're 65, and Alan calls it our go-go years in your 60s, your slow-go years in your 70s and 80s, and then your no-go years in your 90s and 100s.
Speaker 3So we're trying to take advantage of that.
Speaker 4But you already know we're doing. We want to do different things ministry-wise, like with the mission field. Different, like can't wait to go to turkey.
Speaker 1We're actually going to scotland next week to check out a ministry house in the saint andrews areas.
Speaker 4That'll be cool to do with some friends that are doing that um?
Speaker 2are these non-profits?
Speaker 4that these people have.
Speaker 3This one, I believe, is a non-profit yeah man because alan's into golf oh yeah, and god golf and god make sure it's really cool there's a lot of deals made on the golf course and money.
Speaker 4Man, they love their golf and then this morning I actually had like a little vision of me getting together with some young teenage slash, young adult girls and having like almost like an identity image so good party with them like who are you, wow?
Speaker 3who did god make you to be?
Speaker 4wow, I saw that and I was like wow, lord, it was one of those just downloads downloads and I could see it happening and he showed me how he wanted me to do it give them each a flower, show them how they're blooming, blah, blah, blah, and it was really, really cool. But I would like more of the one-on-one with some or a small group of girls I I feel like I'm becoming one of those elder women in the church a spiritual mama, correct, yeah, yeah these young ones nowadays need spiritual mama.
Speaker 2I do, and really yeah, because it's just god if you guys don't disciple them, the world's gonna warfare out there, jesus it's intense, so rise up, women of god yeah rise up, men of god amen.
Speaker 4Pull in the generation coming behind us, man yeah, yeah, oh well, I'm excited about what's going on. I feel like the glory is being poured out. I feel like the start of the glory is being poured out on the earth, like the water's covering the sea that's that's my sense.
Speaker 2I'm not saying I thus saith the lord. I'm just saying because there's a lot of awakenings happening oh there, there will be a last great harvest before he comes back. For sure there will be.
Speaker 4Yeah, unlike anything ever seen before, exactly and so I feel like we're starting to see teeny signs of that. Um, but yeah, we just want to be more personal and in people's lives as much as we can. Relationships, yeah, exactly, and alan's excellent at that. I I kind of I'm not as good at thinning myself out as he is, but just doing that together and then on our own.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 4Him with the guys and me with some girls.
Speaker 3That's great.
Speaker 4Yeah, I know, that doesn't sound very exciting but it is to me.
Speaker 2You're going to write a book or anything.
Speaker 4Oh, pastor Cherie is going to ask me about this, because she knows that God's asked me to write a book, a children's book, for many years and I haven't done it yet. Oh no, so I need to.
Speaker 2Yes, you can see, you're a rebel, you're disobedient.
Speaker 4Yes, that's what I want to make. It about kind of seeing stuff and stuff man I already have the title, so I just have to do it maybe I've got two books myself.
Speaker 1I just gotta do it, I know, I see that all the time yeah, I think if you can get these young ladies to speak their identity.
Speaker 4Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2If they can get it before the boys, before the kids, before the job, before life, if they can find out who they are and know who they are when all that stuff starts to come and happen, they won't lose themselves, hopefully, because they'll know when all that stuff starts to come and happen.
Speaker 4They won't lose themselves.
Speaker 1hopefully All the other voices Because you were saying something about. Oh, I don't want to ask them like, what's your identity? And I've seen them like just I don't know, like words coming out of their mouth of who they are and how that is going to shape and form how they see themselves. Right, you know what I mean who they really are.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah, he gave me an example. The lord gave me an example of just showing them like, like a flower I think a lot of people have thoughts of who they are and I try to get my youngest son to understand that you can think things, but they don't have power.
Speaker 1Right, it's the words that we say out loud that have the power and the choices yeah, although thought life is very powerful, it is.
Speaker 4I know what you're saying, but then speaking life yeah things come like like prayer.
Speaker 1I mean I try to get him to pray out, pray out loud. You know, I mean thoughts don't really move the hand. I mean they can move the hand of god, but it's the words that we say that have the power what's it say, man?
Speaker 2the tongue is like the rudder of the ship and the words that we speak literally determine the course of our life yeah, yeah how exciting that's you buddy praying.
Speaker 2Yes, sir, oh man thank you so much, sister. Seriously, thank you for blessing us. Man, um, man, god, thank you. I just thank you, lord. I thank you for how you're using Speak Life, god. Yes, it's such an honor, lord, to be a part of this man. It's really humbling, god, to get your kids to come on here and just share how good you are, because, no matter what, they come on and share God, I just hear your faithfulness and your goodness and all these testimonies, god, I just thank you for my sister, lord, and just who she is. God, I thank you for what you're going to do in the ministry with the young girls, the identity they're going to get and how they're going to latch onto it, god, and run with it, and they're not going to settle in life for less than because they know that they're king's kids.
Speaker 2God, um, I just pray that you just restore back this time to star, lord. Thank you, lord, just give it, redeem it back to her. God, in ways in scotland that she couldn't even imagine. Just these little cherries on top. God, that she knows that she's experiencing them. Wow, god, you did that just for me. Yeah, because you're such a personal and such a good God. I pray, lord that the anointing on this testimony just goes out and accomplishes all that. You want it to God, because it really is the anointing that changes things. So just use this Lord like only you can. We love you, god, and we praise you in Jesus' name, amen, amen. Hey Star, can you pray for Speak Life? Pray for me and Dad, absolutely yeah.
Speaker 4Amen.
Speaker 3Lord, I just thank you.
Speaker 4What an honor and privilege to know these mighty men of God. Thank you, lord. Lord, I thank you that you showed me how you see them. Yeah, and you are showing more people who they really are. There's just so many adjectives I could use to describe both of you. Just the fact that they are persistent in going after the things of your heart. God, jesus, people, especially their down and out, people that have been through tough times. That takes persistence to be with others that don't see it in themselves yet.
Speaker 4And here are these two amazing, wonderful brothers of Christ, mighty men of God that are speaking into other people's lives. There's nothing better than to hear somebody come alongside you and have that encouragement, have that word come into your heart and start to sow a seed plant hope. So thank you for how they are like these beautiful seed planters, how they give hope to others, how they give hope to others, how they introduce others to Christ, how they really do live what they're talking about. They live it out loud, they walk the walk. They don't just talk the talk. Thank you, lord. I thank you that you have given them both amazing gifts and the blend is perfect. It's fun to be with them. It's awesome to be with them. There is an anointing on both of you and you bring it together and it's even more like overflowing and it's just spilling onto me. I'm just like I don't want to leave this, thank you.
Speaker 3Lord, because it's so wonderful.
Speaker 4It's so yeah, it's so full of him, his presence, his power, his, his passion. It's all right here. I love it. So, Lord, thank you for their hearts. Uh, I, I ask you to increase their love for what they're doing. Uh, help them to not not grow weary. Thank you for their persistence. Thank you, Lord. Help them to not grow weary.
Speaker 2Yep. Thank you for their persistence. Thank you God.
Speaker 4Thank you for the strength you give them.
Speaker 2Holy Spirit.
Speaker 4That you are that strong tower they can run into every single day.
Speaker 2Thank you.
Speaker 4God, completely surrounded by your love and your power, your joy, your peace. Thank you, god. I pray that, even though they both work so hard, they can Sabbath every week.
Speaker 4They deserve a little break to refresh and get filled up again before they go right back out and bless us. And, lord, I just thank you for the next steps of this, where this ministry is going to take them, however that looks. I thank you that you're showing them in dreams and visions and encounters, those next steps, the next part of this whole amazing ministry that they're living out. And, Lord, I just pray for their families, for Eddie's wife, his kids.
Speaker 2Thank you for mama God.
Speaker 4Yes, for Rowdy's mom, his mama and his sisters, his siblings, lord, I just bless them and, like they were already saying, they get to see Dad and Rowdy brother go to church, do what they do, live their life for you. Thank you, Lord. I know that that's going to return a hundred and a thousand fold back on their heads.
Speaker 2Thank you God.
Speaker 4Let them be awakened in their soul, Lord, and in their heart. Thank you, God.
Speaker 3Arise Exactly, wake up.
Speaker 4Yeah. Let them be awakened in their soul by the testimony of what they're walking out and just like at the very beginning, when Rowdy said, we overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony, we thank you, lord, that that's evident here with these two amazing guys. And so bless their families, bless their hands as they work in their other jobs, not just this ministry and prosper them, lord, I pray for so much prosperity, the windows of heaven to pour out blessings on both of you that you cannot contain.
Speaker 4There is that transference of wealth. I, paul, I pray for it to come upon you in an overwhelming way. Fill up, filling and spilling out over your pockets, in your pockets, in jesus name. And so, lord, and the last thing I ask for is I thank you for the anointing that's on them. That's a breaker anointing to break off yokes off of all the people that are in their company and who get to hear them share. Thank you for that anointing that's on them, for that that setting people free.
Speaker 4And I pray as people are feeling that and experiencing that, they make that connection, it's because they live and love you. You are the freedom that has brought them this, this, this life that they're living now the best life, as rowdy said. So we just thank you for their life. We thank you for their love for the kingdom, for you, and we thank you for the time they share with others, with this ministry. May we all be blessed by it in jesus name amen.
Speaker 2Thank you so much, sister. That was really good. Man, uh, everybody. Man, I don't know where you're watching from or, uh, where you're listening, but if you could please, um, subscribe to the channel. Man, follow us. Uh, if you're on YouTube, hit the little bell. Subscribe to all the new uh notifications. You'll get all the future episodes and testimonies that we're going to be doing. Um, you yourself, man, got a good testimony or you're at a place where you received your healing and you want to come in and share. You can reach out through social media, facebook and Instagram Speak Life, az. All one word. Send me a message, man, I'll get back to you. Maybe God's blessed you and you have resources that you're able to sow seeds into ministries. We are a 501c3 nonprofit. You can support the show. We can use all the support we can get. Please, wherever you're at, go and comment. Just write Jesus. It helps with all the algorithms and stuff with the podcast being seen. Um, but until next time, we're going to continue to speak life, az. God bless you.
Speaker 1Jesus.