The Broject Podcast
The Broject Podcast
Is bettering yourself creating more problems in your life?
Ready to change your life? Work directly with me to create the 2.0 you in under 8 weeks. APPLY BELOW
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Come hang out on IG - https://instagram.com/mikele.k
Want to work together? Let's see if we are a good fit. https://form.jotform.com/212481465098461
Can happiness and fulfillment ever be constant? Join us as we unpack this provocative question and explore the ebb and flow of life’s emotional landscape. We'll dive into the role of self-awareness in optimizing for a more enriched life, touching upon key areas such as intimacy, purpose, and relationships. I'll share my personal journey, highlighting how periods of initial ease can sometimes trap us in a victim mindset. Together, we’ll question our motives behind daily actions, like hitting the gym, revealing deeper truths about ourselves. Learn how I navigated resistance in fitness, personal development, and meditation, and wrestled with the internal dialogue that can paralyze decision-making, all while striving to find a balance between self-improvement and seeking external validation.
In our next chapter, we pivot to the power of conscious choices and their profound impact on our lives. Every action we take and habit we form leaves a lasting imprint on our future. By making deliberate decisions, we can reclaim control and avoid future regrets. This episode urges you to reflect on the cascading effects of your choices and how they shape the trajectory of your life. Get ready for a thought-provoking conversation that aims to empower you to steer your life in the direction you truly desire. Your engagement and support mean the world to us, and we can’t wait to continue this insightful journey with you.
Ready to change your life? Work directly with me to create the 2.0 you in under 8 weeks. APPLY BELOW
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Come hang out on IG - https://instagram.com/mikele.k
Want to work together? Let's see if we are a good fit. https://form.jotform.com/212481465098461
One of the things I feel like a lot of people don't realize about having constant fulfillment and happiness in life is that it will never be constant and it's always fleeting and it's always up and down and it always ebbs and flows. But there are ways we can optimize for a happier, more fulfilled life, and one of the first stages of this is awareness. And one of the first stages of this is awareness. If you bring awareness to the things that really fill up your cup and fill you up from an intimacy standpoint, from a purpose standpoint, from a relationship, from a financial, from a business, and when you're aware of these things, it gives you a chance to optimize for them so you can plan your week, month, year as a very tactical kind of way to go about it. A little spoiler alert is there's always going to be resistance. Over my life I've had a lot of resistance, and no, it's not the resistance of coming from a war-torn country or a lack of opportunity, like I'm super blessed to be born in a first world country and have things available to me that a lot of people don't have. But the thing with that is sometimes, when things are too easy at the beginning points of life. It can create a weaker mindset, a lazier mindset and, in my case, a victim mindset. And there's been many times in my life when I've looked at things through the lens of externalizing the problems and not taking responsibility for them. And I'm not talking about this as a whole, but I feel like it's a lot of times people don't talk about this. Like you will get to a point in life where, as you go down this developmental journey, that you start to question everything and what happens with new questions. You start to get new answers, you start to reveal new things about yourself, and sometimes the things you start to reveal about yourself can be very, very confronting. And other times you can build this awareness for, like, okay, I'm going to invest in a coach, I'm going to do this personal development program, I'm going to go to the gym and start getting fit. And then you question why do you want to do it? And for me, this came up a lot and this is the point of awareness I'm speaking to. I sat a 10-day Vipassana retreat and I came out the back of it. I'm like why do I even go to the gym? Like, why? Like, why do I go to the gym? And what came up for me was it was purely from a vanity place, like I'm just doing this to be perceived in a way by others, that I took value in the way others perceived me and look, I'll be real, like, yeah, I still do that. I think we all do at some point, whether it's the car we drive, the house we live in, the job we have, how we identify in a certain job and role, like we take pride in that. Yeah, so there's nothing wrong with that. And that's kind of like where I'm getting to with this. We will forever question the things we do around the intention of why we're doing them, and you can always look at it two sides right.
Speaker 1:What I found was from going to the gym, when I put that down for a couple weeks, I was less efficient at work, my focus was worse, my sleep was actually worse, my food habits dropped off, I was more lethargic. My happiness level, I've said, would have gone from like an eight to a six. Every area of my life was affected. And then I came to the realization, like, well, I've lived my life in the last eight years in a very content, happy place. I was like well, I wonder if fitness the byproduct of having a constant fitness routine has created that Training can release a lot of endorphins, serotonin, oxytocin, all these feel good hormones. And when I went back into my fitness routine I realized like, oh shit, I am not doing this for me, like I was doing it for myself, unconsciously, because I felt good all the time. But sometimes you don't have awareness around what does a certain thing for you until you remove it Hypothetically, like eating well, or when you improve your sleep, you're like, oh no, I feel normal, this is me and I have energy, I'm good. And then you take away the bad sleep patterns and you improve your sleep and all of a sudden it's better. This was the gym for me and it always has been.
Speaker 1:Now this is when it starts to get tricky, when you start moving down the line of developing yourself and personal development, emotional awareness, awakening, whatever you want to name it, because you start to have this internal dialogue and this is the resistance I'm speaking of that I've had a lot in my life, had this internal dialogue of what's right and what's wrong, what should I be doing and what shouldn't I be doing. It's like, bro, you're just trying to diet right now, to get lean, to get more appreciation, likes on Instagram, more attention in the gym, to show that other guy in the gym that you're leaner than him, even though you've never spoken. Because everyone that goes to a gym for a long period of time has that arch nemesis they've never spoken to and they look at them and they internalize this little back and forth watch what they bench, watch what they squat, and they can do more. If you know what I'm talking about, you know. If you don't, don't worry about it.
Speaker 1:And for a big part of my life, when I started to invest in coaches and mentors and courses and programs and went down a very, very deep path of meditation, I started to question everything I was doing. And the byproduct of questioning everything you start to create resistance in doing anything because you're forever questioned if it's right or wrong. Is this the thing I should be focusing or should I be focusing on someone else or something else? And this is a very dangerous place to be in, because you start to question your identity as a whole and the things you've been doing and if they're aligned with what you really want to do, and it can get really fucking confusing. My message to you is that you don't have to pigeonhole yourself into anyone else's expectation of how reality should be, guess what.
Speaker 1:You can go out and drink on weekends. You can have a vino every night and still crush business and still be a spiritually enlightened person and still practice yoga every day. You can go and eat fast food a few nights a week and still crush your fitness routine. Go and eat fast food a few nights a week and still crush your fitness routine. Like. There are just certain things where it's not and or it's. You can have both. And the problem isn't with the action itself. Sometimes it's the story, event and meaning we give to the action. Like if we'd like to decompress with a glass of vino at the end of the day a few nights a week, every night, throughout the week. If that then allows you to switch off from work and then have your social life, have your downtime, and it allows you to, it gives you that thing at the end of the day that you're looking forward to. You can enjoy your beer, you can enjoy your vino, you can enjoy your weekends out with the boys, as long as you understand that if you do, I have both and be okay with the 10-year goal. Might take 15 years, might take 12 years, might take 20 years. I might not ever get there. And if you're okay with that, good, and if you're not okay with it, good. You get to choose.
Speaker 1:Moving forward Now. The choice sometimes can be very difficult because a lot of times we're trying to make a choice from a position of not having a reference point for that, and what I mean is let's use the vino or not situation, because a lot of people in Bali judge people for drinking alcohol, and myself and Selena love a glass of vino at the end of the day. So I'm going to fight this argument. I'm pro vino right now. So I'm going to fight this argument. I'm pro-vino right now. If we use the example of a vino a night, well, if you've forever lived a big part of your life drinking a few bottles, a few glasses of wine or a few beers every single night as your knockoff, it's very hard for you to make a decision for yourself if that is the best practice for you.
Speaker 1:Moving forward, a lot of people are just going to umbrella, statement this and say, no, it's a net negative. But I'm not always going to agree with that, because we're just not so black and white like that as humans. So you're trying to make a decision from a place of not having the experience of the other side. Same with business. Like a lot of people will think, they want to start an online business and they've been an employee their whole life and they've never actually ran a business, had employees, had responsibilities and realized everything falls on them. So what can happen is when someone starts an online business, they're trying to make a decision on how they're going to make money Say it's through e-com, selling physical products, say drop shipping, say a newsletter, a podcast, content creation, an agency, a coach, whatever the thing is. Yet we're trying to make this long-term decision from a place of never experience and we have no data to choose from. And this is what I take a lot of clients through, especially when we work in an online business space.
Speaker 1:You can't make all the decisions right now from having no data because you haven't got any experiences or any information to make that decision from. Just like when people are going to pick stocks in the stock market, they're collecting data from all these past events and things that have happened and making a decision from there, betting on a short or long, and in business there are easy ways to be able to consume this data and if you know how and where to look and then make a decision from here. You need to get out in the world and try things. You can't just read a book about a principle or a philosophy or an understanding of the world and someone who's gone out and has experienced that and applied that in life and then agree to it and disagree to it when you haven't even tried it.
Speaker 1:Fitness is a thing that's done amazing things for thousands and thousands and thousands of people, just from a mental health standpoint. It's done amazing things for me too. Yet I was under that question the weight of that question if I'm just doing this from a vanity place, from a place of vanity and yes, the gym initially was that at first, but later on, what I found it supports every area of my life. So I think it's good at times to question these beliefs we choose not to question because the beliefs we choose not to question, because the beliefs we choose not to question are the most dangerous beliefs to hold onto. You may have heard the term.
Speaker 1:It comes down to having strong opinions loosely held, being okay to be proven wrong, being okay to see another side of the coin compared to loose opinions strongly held. And a loose opinion would be a belief about yourself in the world, without putting yourself in that position, saying like, yeah, I could run a marathon in three hours. Yeah, I could run a marathon in three and a half hours, yet you've never run 5k. That's a loose opinion strongly held. You've got no real world data and depth to make that decision.
Speaker 1:So for you guys out there that are investing deeply into personal development you're working with a coach, you're working with a mentor, you're going down the path of self-discovery through books or podcasts or whatever that is I would very much invite you to be okay with who you are as a person, be okay with the things you genuinely love doing, but bring awareness to either side of them. Bring awareness to the side of do you want to give that thing up? Is there something in life you want more than what you currently have? Maybe, maybe not. That is something you get to decide and if you can come from this place, from this objective place, looking at a bird's eye view at both sides of the fence of doing that thing or not doing the thing, without looking at it through the lens of judgment, you will make a better decision, moving forward every single time.
Speaker 1:Every action will have a reaction in life. Every habit, as small as you think it is, will have a byproduct and an ongoing and an echo effect in your life. You just get to choose what you want that byproduct to be and with this, we take control, we take sovereignty, we get power back. We take sovereignty, we get power back. And from this place, this is where you really get to make a conscious decision about your life, and not look in the rearview mirror 5, 10, 15, 20 years from now and think to yourself fuck, mikkel was right in that video. Thank you again for dropping past. This has been another conversation inspired by coffee. I'm very much open to coffee sponsorships. It has been a big part of my life and I think it's been a big part of my success in every area. So thanks for dropping in, hit the like, subscribe, bing, do all the things. Appreciate you guys and I'll see you on the next one.