Achieve The Future Faster! The Cheat Code To Keeping Your Resolutions

This is THE episode!! If you want to have a massively transformational 2024 then YOU NEED TO HEAR THIS!
If you are tired of your current routine, need a change, if you are tired of setting the same goals and same New Year's Resolution over and over -- this episode will give you the cheat code.

Did you know?
- 23% of people quit their resolution for the new year by the end of the first week
- 43% of people quit by the end of January
- Only 9% of people claim to stick to their resolutions all year!

The most common things people promise themselves in the New Year?
- Exercise more
- Eat healthier
- Lose weight
- Save more money
- Spend more time with loved ones
- Spend less time on social media
- Reduce stress at work
- Reduce living expenses

Sound familiar? Have another goal in mind?

Let's turn those resolutions and promises to yourself into reality. This episode is all about how to start doing what it takes to embrace a new and more aligned version of YOU, and quit falling for "the fallacy of tomorrow".

Spoiler here... this is all about giving yourself power and autonomy in the RIGHT NOW!!


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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

How can you actually align yourself with the thing that you want so that if the world presented it to you tomorrow, that if it just fell right into your lap, that you would be ready to receive it? That's exactly it. That's the name of the game Getting ready, creating and curating a reality that, if this thing were just to be hand delivered to you, you'd be ready. Great, perfect, hello, my loves, and welcome to the Purposeful Lifestyle Development Podcast, where we discuss all things thought, work and manifestation but we use neuroscience and the study of the brain to do so. I'm your host, tessa Spizak. I'm a board certified practitioner, master life and health coach and seasoned executive speaker. If you're ready to create your highest value lifestyle and turn your dream life into a reality, you're in the right place. Let's get right into today's episode. Hello, hello, my loves, and welcome into this week's episode of the Purposeful Lifestyle Development Podcast. For those of you who tune in every week, thank you so much for spending your time with me here. It means the world to me to have this conversation with you all, and if you're new here, welcome in. Don't forget to hit subscribe so that you're able to stick around and be part of this conversation and with that y'all we are officially in November.

Speaker 1: 1:25

I mean, where has this year gone? I feel like it has both absolutely flown by, but also this time last year feels like a lifetime ago. I think for me personally this has been a really transformative year and I've had the opportunity and the blessing honestly to really tap into some new and developing or changing parts of myself. I mean I used this summer to really get centered and grounded again in my goals and in my aspirations and in my creativity, which really was a huge blessing. And I mean these last few years for me have been such a change. I went from a busy, all over the place girl in her 20s living in the city scheduling my life around meetings, to a full-time life coach and wellness speaker, working from home in the suburbs in the hills, with a husband and a stepson who has football practice and homework to schedule. I mean I have a garden to tend to and we have a travel schedule and it's a completely wonderful and welcome change. Don't get me wrong. I mean I got all the things that were on my buy 30 vision board, but to say it was in a whirlwind yeah, it happened fast and it happened all through the pandemic and all of that, and I think that it's just something that we're all going through as a collective in some shape or form.

Speaker 1: 2:53

Just over the last year or two, or again we can even say post 2020 where there was this creation of a new normal for a lot of people Even talking about things like more people working from home or leaving a traditional work environment, maybe taking more entrepreneurial roles, or even just the ever-changing financial and housing world A lot of people have moved and just a variable of different things. One thing I'm hearing from a lot of people in so many different ways, essentially is wanting to ease or settle into a new version of normal that is just more in line with what they actually want A new normal or new reality that is more aligned, and I feel like this is widespread. The people I talk to are all over the world. This isn't just in one place that I feel like. People are just essentially throwing their hands up and saying, okay, enough is enough. I just want to clear out and get rid of all the crap I picked up along the way, whether it's habits that don't serve me or don't serve me anymore, or I've fallen into a routine that doesn't feel good, or I maybe stop doing a lot of the things that do make me feel my best, and I'm done with it. I want to get that back, or stop this new thing that I keep finding myself doing, or I can't seem to find a rhythm, and I'm done with it. It's time. And if you feel that way too, if this is you, if that resonates or feel familiar, then I'm so glad you're listening today, because that's exactly what I want to talk about, and I think one trap that we all fall into when we're trying to make a big change or do something different is that it's something that I like to consider the fallacy of tomorrow.

Speaker 1: 4:42

And now, I'm sure there's an actual name for this phenomena and I tried to find it for this episode, but I couldn't. But it's this funny little thing that our brain likes to do, where it gives so much credit and so much optimism to some version of future. You, whether maybe that's tomorrow like I'll do this tomorrow, I'll be better tomorrow. Maybe this is you on Monday. I mean, how many of my I'll start Monday? People are listening right now, or maybe around this time of year, what we see, a lot is okay. This is my New Year's resolution In 2024, 2024, me, this is what I'm going to be doing.

Speaker 1: 5:24

And in this phenomena, where we give so much credit and we're so optimistic about that tomorrow, you, monday, you, january 1st, you we tend to simultaneously discredit the current you Like, oh, I don't have energy for that right now, but when Monday comes, damn it, I'll be ready, or I'll have the energy and the motivation then, whatever that future then is, and then I'll be perfect. You know, maybe even something like I know I can't follow my current routine right now, but in the new year I'll be able to follow an even harder, even more complex one. How familiar does that sound? You, me, everyone? Yes, yes, because that's what humans do. And unfortunately, that's why, statistically, 80% of New Year's resolutions fail by February. That's why we keep telling ourselves over and over and over, sometimes for years and years, that we have the same goal, that we have the same New Year's resolution. Again, it's why people don't do them, because they tend to not stick, because we have this crazy idea that tomorrow us is just an entirely new person, they're totally different from today us. Because today we don't give ourselves enough credit. No, I don't feel good enough da-da-da-da-da, any host of excuses I can't do it today, but tomorrow, monday, next year, totally I can do it.

Speaker 1: 6:51

And now is this to say that you can't change your life completely overnight? Well, of course not. You can, and many people do. People stop bad habits called turkey or just make the decision that that's, that there's no going back. But for the majority of people, and in the majority of cases, that's just not the way it works. There's too much engraved or intertwined in our subconscious or in our habits or a day-to-day life that we can trip up and mess up, and sometimes even without even realizing it until after the fact. And then you get the disappointment. Right, all the unhelpful thoughts start creeping in that tend to keep us even further from our goals. Right, that little voice that says something like like oh, look at that, mess up, that's proof. That's proof that you can't do it or that you're not determined enough, or that you'll never change. You don't have what it takes to change Again sound familiar. So how do we get around this? How do we avoid this?

Speaker 1: 7:51

Let's take something like New Year's resolutions. That's what I'm going to use for this conversation. I think that's really, really important to have, especially around this time of year. Let's use that. What about your New Year's resolutions? Whether you say you make them or not, I mean you know what I mean when you look at that new year, or heck again for my Wait Till Monday, people, even if you're thinking about Monday and the start of the new perfect week, what do you see? What are those aspirations? And I mentioned this in the last episode, but I really want to drill it in today.

Speaker 1: 8:24

We don't want these to be incredibly general, especially if you have a big goal or dream or something like that on the list. Like, say, you really want to run a 10K, a 10K marathon next year and that's your big goal, right. But right now your current you is having a really hard time to sticking to the workout routine you have, the running routine that you have. I would highly suggest to you don't just put or run a marathon on the list, right. Take a few extra minutes and get clear on what that means specifically for you. You'll need a new training schedule, maybe a coach, probably some new shoes. You'll have to plan on upping your daily water intake that maybe you've been slacking on. There's a lot that goes into it. So, for someone who is currently, like in this example, not great with their current workout routine or maybe isn't focusing on water.

Speaker 1: 9:21

Does it make sense that they'll successfully hit that New Year's resolution to run a marathon? Probably not. But what if? What if they now, in November, even before that energy of the New Year that we're all relying on comes about? What if we started getting everything ready? We just looked at it that way, though. We're getting it ready. What if, in November, they went and tried to get the right shoes and talked to a few coaches, started gathering a little list of notes? What if they joined a few groups, maybe on social media or in their local area, of people in their community that are training for the same thing? Maybe they got excited scoping out some new parks that they can run at, or they started getting excited about new training routines, started really looking into that. When the New Year comes along and then they declare this resolution, which person do you think would be more successful? The person who was putting it off, waiting? You know what, in the New Year, in 2024, I'm going to run a marathon period. Or the person that spent those eight weeks, six weeks, whatever it is some period of time doing all the back end work, getting ready, creating that law of attraction for the goodness to come in.

Speaker 1: 10:44

Or here are some other popular ones. Our most popular New Year's resolutions were reported for this last year, for 2023. Here's what they are we have exercise more kind of in line with that example there I think that's why I thought of it. We have eat healthier and in that same vein, there's lose weight. So all kind of focused on health there. Next was save money, then there was spend more time with friends. Closely behind that was spend less time on social media. There was reduce stress at work, followed actually no tide with reduce living expenses. So those are the most common resolutions, at least for this year, for 2023, basically focusing on physical health, our social health and our financial health.

Speaker 1: 11:29

So my question is what can we do about it now, here at the beginning of November? How can we give January 1st us the best chance at succeeding? Because here's more statistics for you 23% of people report quitting their resolution by the end of the first week. That's almost a quarter of people who set out a goal for themselves. Don't make it to the end of the first week. 43% almost half of the people who set out with a goal or a resolution at the beginning of the year, they're done by the end of January and statistically this is what kills me as someone who helps people set their goals and keep their goals right Only 9% of people claim to have stuck to their New Year's resolution all year. So if we don't want to be in that just about a quarter percent of everyone who sets a goal quitting by that first week and we don't want to be in the almost half that quit within a month and we do want to get ourselves into that 9% or maybe we're on my mission how do we make that 9% go way way up?

Speaker 1: 12:43

I say start now, do the back end work, get a plan in place, figure out what changes in your current reality, your current day to day, that you would need to change to bring your goals into your reality successfully. And we know there are things that need to change. I'm not saying this to be harsh, but it's the fact, because if there wasn't things that need to change now, then there wouldn't be a resolution, there wouldn't be something that you wanted because you already would have it. So how do we make getting it or achieving it easier? How do we make that more likely? How do we bring this closer to our reality? What schedules can you put into place? What habits can you start curating and turning into habits right now From there? Where do we start seeing habit stacks? Where can we again make it easier? What if just hear me out here, stick with me what if you just shifted your mindset a little bit, tap into a little bit of the reward system in the brain? And what if you just think of these next two months, the last part of this year, as a springboard or even as a cheat code to getting exactly what you want in the next year, whatever it is, whether it's changing or improving your health, if it's working on your relationship, saving money, changing jobs. I talked a lot about this in one of my way earlier episodes, but it is still one of my most regularly downloaded, re-listened to.

Speaker 1: 14:11

Responded to the episode of the science of manifestation. How can you actually align yourself with the thing that you want so that if the world presented it to you tomorrow, that if it just fell right into your lap, that you would be ready to receive it? That's exactly it. That's the name of the game Getting ready, creating and curating a reality that if this thing were just to be hand delivered to you, you'd be ready, great, perfect. We're ready to go. You have to be able to see yourself as doing and being and thinking in line with that thing that you want you have to be. It has to be familiar to your brain so that your brain doesn't freak out and think like danger, danger, and give you every excuse or every reason in the book to not go after it, to not take action or not to move in a way that actually moves the needle in your life.

Speaker 1: 15:04

If you think in 2024, that you are going to be dedicating an hour of your day, every single day, to something like every day you're going to work out or meal prep or work on your passions or whatever it is, but you haven't created a system to allow for it or you haven't even tried it yet. We're just putting it off. And putting it off and waiting to the new year or waiting until it feels just right quote unquote or pushing it off until Monday again, right? What if we stopped with that idea that the future you has some qualities that you don't have and that this future you isn't subject to the human experience of bad days, sleepy days, distracted days, and just gave a little bit more credit to the you that is you right now and you allowed yourself the space and the vulnerability in the room to grow in that way and to try and maybe fail and try another way.

Speaker 1: 15:59

What if we went into the new year with two months or six weeks or whatever the case may be all this time behind us that we spent practicing and working on aligning and two months of working towards creating some sort of consistency towards the things that we want, rather than just putting all of this pressure on this future version of you to somehow have it all figured out and have this routine that you haven't even tried yet, and to have this determination that you have a hard time finding today right? What if you started embodying your new year's resolutions right now? Mentally? It can do this little flip in the brain that gives you the room to try and the room to fail and the room to deviate and try it in a new way and try new things and be able to try it right, because now we're just looking at it as behind the scenes work, because this isn't even the new year yet and this is our new year's resolution. What if we could shape it that way?

Speaker 1: 17:03

And the cool thing about it is too that's where the real change happens. Not only are we actively working on what we want, which is fantastic in the goal, really within itself, but we're actively creating those new neural pathways in the brain. That makes it easier, we're doing the work to get our brains on our sides. Again, our brain is always trying to get us to do things that it is familiar with, that it understands, even if that means keeping us stuck, keeping in our comfort zone, because it's what it knows. When we're doing something new and we're doing something different and our brain isn't familiar with this concept, idea, habit, whatever, it's going to yell danger, danger. I don't know what this is, I don't know what the outcome is and we're going to get every single thought as to push you away from it. So instead, we're creating these new neural networks, we're creating that familiarity and we're starting that reward cycle to where, when we go after the thing that, again, our brain is familiar with and it likes, and we do it and we're successful here's a little bit of dopamine and serotonin go do it again and the cycle continues.

Speaker 1: 18:13

So if you do it now. Here's what I can promise You'll have a better chance of seeing your wins as actual wins and not just taking them for granted, as you would maybe on January 1st, where that resolution has already started, where when you have a successful day you're not really giving yourself that mental pat on the back because it's well, this was my baseline. But if you're looking at it as doing this work behind the scenes, maybe early pre-work, then it's a lot easier to notice when we get it right. It's oh, look at me right, very nice, look at me pat on the back right, rather than just only being able to see the failure when it's not perfect. If we start it now, before the, I guess you could call like action set or like start date of this resolution, you won't see the quote unquote failures or setbacks or, more appropriately, we'll just call them learning curves. We won't see them as failing, because it's something that you're learning ahead of time, before your commitment started in the new year. Or again, replace with Monday, whatever the case. And not only that, you're teaching your brain that you are able to be flexible. You're showing your brain that you can change how you please and that it is safe to have autonomy over yourself and over your decisions.

Speaker 1: 19:38

So, as a community, let's do this. Let's think about our New Year's resolutions that I know you set, whether you admit it or not. Get them out in front of you. Get specific about not only what the goal is, but what that means for you and your schedule, and all the little tweaks and changes that you're going to need to make. And what if we start embodying those traits and those changes right now, even just small little things? Try it on for size.

Speaker 1: 20:04

Give that power back to the now you and stop punishing future you by having this belief that somehow they're going to have all this power that you didn't spend the time cultivating today, that you haven't found yet today. Don't punish future. You like that. Start working on it behind the scenes. This is your reminder. You don't need a perfect day, a perfect week, a perfect month, perfect year even, and you don't have to feel perfect all the time to just get started. But what you do need is to stop letting that version of you that you want to be lived locked away and your fantasies and your goal setting about tomorrow, let it live today in your today reality.

Speaker 1: 20:53

You are deserving of all the things you want for yourself.

Speaker 1: 20:56

You absolutely are able to live in that potential that you want and please, please, let me know what you are committing to for your highest you and, if this helps, please let me know with a positive comment or review. Not only is it such an honor to be on this journey with you, but it also helps boost up this conversations to other who could benefit from joining our community. But I send all of my love to each and every one of you. Have an amazing week and I cannot wait to hear. Please, let me know what you are starting today for this new year, you. But all right, my loves, that's where I'll leave us today. I want to thank you so much for joining in on this conversation with me, and each week, every Monday, we're going to be posting a new episode, going a little bit deeper into the conversation, of what you can do to train your brain on purpose to really allow for the lifestyle that you want to live. Until next time, my loves. In the meantime, here's to your health and your happiness.