Mom2Mentor
Encouraging and motivating single mothers, reminding them of their strength and determination. They can succeed as a single parent as long as they remain focused.
Its not about how you arrived at the TITLE, but, what you do with it!
Mom2Mentor
How to Instill Strength in Your Kids: A Parent's Guide
This episode explores effective strategies for raising resilient children amid the challenges of parenting alone. I focus on essential themes that foster strength, independence, and emotional health in kids.
• Understanding the importance of facing and managing disappointment
• Encouraging children to participate in physical activities
• Fostering independence through age-appropriate responsibilities
• Celebrating achievements to boost self-confidence
• Establishing open communication with children
• Teaching empathy and respect for others
Join me every week for more insights tailored for single mothers navigating the journey of parenting. Visit my website singlemomsunitedpodcast.com and be part of this community.
https://singlemomsunitedpodcast.com/
It's not how you arrived at the title, but what you do with it.
Hey, ladies, welcome to the Single Moms United podcast. I'm so glad you decided to join today and if this is your first time, welcome. And if you are a repeat listener, thank you for your loyalty. Hey, this is a shout out to all single moms out there that's trying to do it on your own. I know how hard it can be, because I, too, am a single mom just trying to make it through, but the good news is, a lot of the challenges you're facing I've already faced. So this podcast is designed to encourage and motivate you. Single mom, yeah, I know you need it. You know how I know, because I needed it. So the good news is this podcast is designed to encourage, motivate and, of course, offer you suggestions regarding critical thinking when it comes to parenting, because it's essential, as a parent, that we display more positive behaviors in front of our children than negative, right, because we want them to be productive citizens.
Speaker 1:At the end of the day, and at some point they are going to leave your home. They are, and you need to prepare them, mom. You need to prepare them for life's challenges. So great segue to what I want to talk about today, which is how to influence and raise strong kids. Because why is that important? Because, again, you're going to release them in the world and you're more than just a mom, you're more than just a nurturer, you're a mentor. Yeah, they look up to you, mom, that's right. So this should be brief and to the point. But let's see how to encourage and promote raising strong kids.
Speaker 1:Well, the first is, let them face challenges, go ahead and let them be disappointed through life. They are going to be disappointed and they're going to know, need to know, how to deal with that disappointment. And unfortunately, a lot of people deal with disappointment in different ways Bad relationships they're trying to fill that void of that disappointment and other manners that are just not healthy and are unsafe. So, as a child, let them face that disappointment. Let them try to participate in a sport and they not get it. And then that's when you step in, mom right, to encourage them and letting them know that it's not the end of the world. And I think one of the bigger mistakes we make as parents is that we don't set our children up for disappointment, we don't educate them about disappointment. To let them know it's not the end of the world. Something better is for you, right. The other thing keep them active and moving every day.
Speaker 1:Well, kids are generally active and out doing something, so all you want to do is continue to encourage them, teach them to understand and handle emotions Not going to dwell a lot on this, but it's not always going to be a good day. They're going to encounter bad days. Yeah, that's just life and you have to explain to them. That's just life and you have to explain to them. That's just life. Don't get discouraged and demotivated because you're having a bad day. You put it where it belongs behind you and you look forward and say you know what? I'm not going to bring that bad experience with me. I'm going to create a positive experience and move forward. That's how we do that.
Speaker 1:Give them responsibilities to build independence, and so this is another segue. So you have to come back next week or for my next episode when we talk about chores and building that chore chart based on age. Hmm, yeah, never too early. Never too early. Boost their confidence with praise and support. There's nothing wrong with you saying good job, way to go. That is awesome. Keep doing what you're doing, because you should be your child's first cheerleader as far as encouragement and having them, letting them know that they did an awesome job at whatever they did Right. So encouragement goes a long way.
Speaker 1:Now listen to them and talk openly. If they want to talk to you, please, mom, listen, take that time out, put the phone down. Matter of fact, in my prior episodes for you that keep coming back again, thank you. I talk about putting that phone down for one hour a day and just spend that time with your child. What's going on? Tell me how you're feeling today, what good happened today, what bad happened today.
Speaker 1:Because why is that important? Because now you're opening an environment of openness so they can come to you and talk to you about anything, and that's what you want. That really is what you want, mom. You don't want them going to someone else for advice or sharing their vulnerabilities to someone else because that person or persons may take advantage of that. Show them how to stay strong through tough times. Yeah, mom, and as a single mom and I know my biggest struggle was financially right and the issues I encountered just trying to pay stuff I'm glad I was able to show my kids we can still do some things, we can still go some places and just be open and honest and just say you know what boo mama just don't have it today. She, she just does not have it today. So let's try this Help them solve problems on their own. Why is that important? Because they are going to experience problems from A to Z and in between they're just going to encounter issues through life and as they continue to grow, and if they're school-age children, they're going to have encounters with their teachers. Teachers don't like they feel. How about that? That the teacher doesn't like them or is picking on them, or there may be schoolmates in the class that they're not getting along with. There just could be multiple things that are happening. But here's the good news. Here is the good news.
Speaker 1:Remember, we talked about having that open dialogue for them to come to you and talk to you about various things, and this would be one of them. And you know what, and I would even frame it as what do you think? The best solution is little Johnny, ask them first before you offer your opinion and then, if he says, well, I want to do this, this and that and the other, or I don't know, then it's okay. And he's like well, why don't you know? Or what concerns do you have? Now, moms, don't freak out on me, like, oh my God, they're going to tell me something I'm not going to have a response to, and you may not, and that's okay. But what's not okay is you not try to find the answer right? Because, remember, you're trying to develop a more open relationship with your child or your children. You have to be receptive to some of the things that they tell you. We are living in the technology age where we can look up anything. Ai is rampant. All you have to do is ask and see what it comes up with, right, and then, if it doesn't give you an acceptable solution, then ask about resources. Yeah, I didn't get the answer. I was looking for that. I can come back to little Johnny and tell him or respond to him about his situation.
Speaker 1:Encourage kindness and empathy towards others and, unfortunately, ladies that has gone by the wayside with this generation. When I was growing up, you had to say please, thank you, I'm sorry, excuse me, all of those mannerisms that show you respected people. Unfortunately, it just seems like it's no longer there and I wonder where the gap is or why we have a gap now between having positive mannerisms and kindness, right and empathy. It's really sad to see our children are just so focused and I don't know if it's because of the social media age and they're exposed to so much more and they identify this rudeness and they think rudeness is okay. I guess that's what it is. I sure hope not.
Speaker 1:But please, mom, encourage your children to be kind and show empathy towards others and not make fun of them. So if someone doesn't look like them, it's okay, it's okay. But what's not okay is you take that and say, oh, so-and-so looks like this, or so-and-so's skin color is this, or their facial features don't match mine, so they're weird. No, no, no, no, no, no. Please, mom, step in, take charge and remind them. Everybody's not going to look like you, but you have to respect. You have to respect who they are and be kind and gentle.
Speaker 1:And it starts now, because if we don't correct the behavior now, guess what? They're going to take it along with them in adulthood and the worst thing you want to happen is they approach the wrong person with the wrong phrases, and we don't want that. We don't want any type of violence and we don't want that. We don't want any type of violence. But if our kids maintain on the track that they're on, my concern is that someone is going to come back and say, hey, don't disrespect me and really just potentially provoke violence, and I think part of that with these school shootings is because of the bullying and the lack of respect for others which results in violence, and we don't want to do that.
Speaker 1:Also, set clear rules, but stay loving right, because if you don't have rules, then they think I can do whatever I want to, when I want to and how I want to do it. And no ma'am and no sir. This is not Burger King where you can have it your way. There are rules and there's consequences when you break those rules. It is just that simple. And finally always have their back, no matter what.
Speaker 1:So even when you identify they're doing something wrong, you don't, and especially in public. Your approach has to be sensitive, mom, you have to do that in a sensitive manner, okay, because a lot of times they don't know that they're in the wrong. So you have to educate them. Yelling doesn't always get it. Yelling only puts fear in them. But if you talk to them and explain to them why it's wrong or what they did or their behavior that they're displaying once you explain that, then guess what that's going to set up, to be ingrained in them and respect you more, because now you're talking to them and not at them, right, yeah, and you're still the parent I hear you Well, doesn't that diminish my parenting skills or the respect? No, it actually gains more respect because again you want to have that relationship with your child or your children, where they can come and talk to you. This world is something else. I can't stress it enough.
Speaker 1:You know it was hard bringing up my kids and thankfully we didn't have social media back then, those influencers, social media back then, those influencers, now moms. I mean, I really do empathize with you because you do have to deal with that level, that impact of social media, of them seeing everything and why they have the blocks and the children's mode and all of that stuff. But our kids are smart, they're very smart, they know how to get around that stuff. But our kids are smart, they're very smart, they know how to get around that stuff. And then, certainly, if they're hanging out with someone where the parent isn't as strict, hey, I'll just go over little Rocky's house and, you know, be back after a while and getting exposed to all kinds of negative things that they shouldn't be exposed to Now it's diluting their character. Their character is getting diluted as a result of bringing in these negative things that you don't want them exposed to.
Speaker 1:And that's why you got to have that open dialogue. That's why you have to create that safe space for them to come and talk to you. And you can do this, take a deep breath and say, okay, let's talk about it. I remember when my kids would tell me mama has something to tell you. My heart just dropped because I was scared, because I didn't know what they was going to tell me. Right? But at the end of the day, I was glad that they were able to say I want to talk to you about something, I have something to tell you, and I'm glad that they were able to do that. Yeah, and I just did appropriately, right. I had to hold on for a minute Like, oh my God, what is it? What is it? What is it, what is it? At the end of the day, I'm glad that I was able to foster a relationship with my kids where they could come to me. And here's the good news I think the level of respect for each other went up, and that's what has to happen as your kids get older.
Speaker 1:Discipline and things change as your children get older. How you approach your children changes as they get older. They're no longer five and six Now you got a 10 and 11, right, so they're maturing. And how do you engage with a more mature child? You can't practice that same behavior that you did when they were five and six. That's where I'm going with that.
Speaker 1:All right, ladies, I hope you enjoyed today's episode and if you did, hey tell another single mom and then follow me. You know, however, you register to get updates when I publish new episodes. Would love that you can also visit singlemomsunitedpodcastcom. Leave me some feedback there. Go to my YouTube channel. Leave me some feedback there. I would love to hear from you I really would and soon I will be having guests on my show and if you're interested in becoming a guest, there is a guest form on my website, so fill that out and let me know what you want to talk about. And let's get in the weeds a little more when it comes to parenting and encouraging one another. All right, ladies, have a fantastic day, a wonderful week and a marvelous month. Take care.
