From Winging It To Owning It

Doubt on wedding day can be quiet but crushing—the second-guessing after a tough call, the 2 a.m. mental replay, the nagging feeling that something's off even when the night goes "fine." That's what winging it feels like, even when you're good at what you do.

In this episode, From Winging It to Owning It, Krisy Thomas, Senior Educator with The CWP Society, sits down with Master Certified Wedding Planners,   Nikki Rodgers and Brittney Poole, to unpack how they made the shift from reactive problem-solving to confident, visible leadership that vendors trust and couples feel.

We get specific about what changed. Certification didn't just add letters after their names, it gave them usable frameworks: contracts that protect the work, pricing that reflects value, and timelines detailed enough to coordinate arrivals, handoffs, and contingencies without friction. They show how defined assistant roles expand your field of view, and why proactive vendor communication turns a list of services into a true team.

The difference between winging it and owning it shows up in moments that matter, like a guest collapsing during dinner and the room staying composed because the plan, the roles, and the trust were already in place.

We also confront the hidden cost of improvising your way through: undervaluing fees, fraying venue relationships, and fueling the misconception that planners are optional. Nikki and Brittney explain how identifying blind spots, package design, clause gaps, staffing standards, reduced anxiety and raised the quality bar. Their candor about perfectionism, pressure, and the physical toll of constant vigilance is matched by a clear path forward: build systems, practice them, and surround yourself with peers who share your standards.

The community piece matters. Regular workshops, co-working sessions, and mentorship turned a solitary job into a supportive network that speeds decisions and sustains momentum.

If you've felt that quiet tug that something's missing, this conversation hands you next steps to replace guesswork with clarity and calm, to stop winging it and start owning it.

Subscribe, share with a planner friend who needs encouragement, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway. Ready to go deeper? Use code PODCAST for $50 off  the Executive Certification Program at cwpsociety.com before the next episode drops.

www.cwpsociety.com | info@cwpsociety.com | IG: @cwpsociety | FB: @cwpsociety

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

You're listening to the Wedding Planner Society podcast, brought to you by the CWP Society.

SPEAKER_03 0:15

Welcome to the Wedding Planner Society Podcast, brought to you by the CWP Society, the world's premier wedding planning certification program. I am Christy Thomas, the senior educator with the CWP Society, and today's conversation is one that I've been looking forward to for a while. Because we're talking about something that so many planners experience but don't always admit out loud. That feeling of uncertainty on wedding days. It's like that internal pressure when something unexpected happens and you're not quite sure if you're handling it in the best way. Or maybe you're even questioning yourself even after you've made the call. Now, even the most experienced planners face moments like this, but the difference isn't whether you feel uncertain sometimes. It's whether you have a solid foundation and a proven process to guide your decisions when those moments hit. And that's exactly what we're diving into today. Now, I am joined by two incredible wedding planners who not only have walked through that transformation themselves, but they're also helping other planners as well. And that is Nikki Rogers, who is a master certified wedding planner and a certified educator with the CWP Society, and Brittany Poole, who is also a master certified wedding planner and serves as an industry advancement director. Both of these women have built their reputations for being calm, confident, and being leaders on wedding days. So today we're going to go back to the before, the moments of doubt, the turning points, and what changed when they stopped winging it and started owning it. Hi, Brittany and Nikki. I'm so excited that you guys are here.

SPEAKER_02 1:47

Hey Chrissy. Hi, Britney. I'm so excited to be here with you both today. Same here.

SPEAKER_01 1:52

Thank you so much, Chrissy, for inviting me to be here.

SPEAKER_03 1:54

Of course. Now, both of you are not strangers to the podcast. Nikki is more of a regular because she is one of our certified educators. But Brittany, you have embraced us as well on the podcast. So I'm excited that you both are here together. And I kind of want to start at the beginning. And Nikki, I'll kick it off with you. Was there a wedding day, maybe early in your career, where you felt less confident, maybe than you appeared? Was there a moment where you questioned whether you were handling things the right way?

SPEAKER_02 2:22

Well, Chrissy, now that's going pretty far back. Early in my career, there were definitely weddings where everything looked calm on the outside. But internally, I was second-guessing myself constantly. Being in my early 20s and running the biggest day of someone's life had its challenges, especially when I personally had never been married myself. And while nothing had gone wrong exactly, in every moment, there was a lot of moving pieces, struggles with strong personalities, and last-minute changes. And I just remember thinking to myself, am I making the right call here? Is this what the best decision is for the couple? Or just what the vendors want to hear me say, especially since a lot of the amazing tech that we have at our fingertips now wasn't available 23 years ago. Cue my old Excel timeline and no day of assistant.

unknown 3:11

Oh gosh, you're so sorry.

SPEAKER_03 3:13

It's funny that you mentioned that because I also think about our founder and CEO, Lori Hartwell, who started when she was just 18. So I can't imagine that uncertainty of I am a literally, quite literally still a teenager dealing with someone's big day and all those pressures that you mentioned earlier of making sure you're making the right decisions, dealing with those really strong personalities that can be a lot, even you know, and just in general, when you're starting out with your wedding planning career. When you were going through that stage, what was kind of going through your head in the moment of feeling that uncertainty?

SPEAKER_02 3:49

So I was actually 18 when I started too. And in those moments, what I was usually thinking about was the pressure to protect the couple's experience. I knew that the stakes were high, and I didn't want my uncertainty to ripple outward to anyone else. As the orchestrator of the day, I leaned heavily on preparation, trusting my own instincts, and reminding myself that confidence doesn't mean having every answer at that moment. It means staying grounded and making thoughtful decisions, even when things felt uncertain. Now, this is all before my certification, of course, and I definitely have learned so much since then. But experiences like that helped shape how I now approach weddings, especially in how I prepare, communicate, and lead calmly through the unexpected that's inevitably going to pop up.

SPEAKER_03 4:41

Yeah, exactly. And Brittany, I I think a lot of planners assume that confidence just comes with experience. That if you do enough weddings, eventually you will feel sure of yourself. But that's not always how it works. What did that feel like for you before you gain your certification?

SPEAKER_01 4:59

Yeah, and just to piggyback off of Nikki, um, like before I became certified, I was definitely more hesitant in my approach to the decision-making process, but in like all of the aspects of my business, whether it was initial consultations, uh conducting meetings with couples and on the wedding day itself, I was just like always second guessing myself. And I would replay the scenarios over and over in my head. And even at like 2 a.m., I'm second guessing and wondering if it was the right decision I made in the moment, especially when I was faced with a problem that I've never encountered before. And I believe that no matter how much experience you have, until you really find yourself in the moment of a new problem, how will you know if you can confidently handle the situation without any education in the matter? And as you always say, Chrissy, and Lori says it all the time too, there are no do-overs on the wedding day. And I believe that every couple deserves a planner who can confidently navigate the planning process in the wedding day.

SPEAKER_03 5:57

Oh, I couldn't agree more. And I I was fortunate to where I found the certification. I at that point had only booked one couple. So, and we were in the planning process itself. So I remember though when they just called me and it was a referral from the photographer who was my wedding photographer. She knew I was getting into weddings, and I they called me out of the blue, and I was like, Yes, I can be your day of coordinator, and I will charge you what's your price?$500. Gosh. And I I looked back, and of course, I was like, was that even where did you come up with that number? And I was like, you don't know what you're doing. You don't know what you are doing. And fortunately, I had found certification, and that really helped me with all of those unknowns that you mentioned, Brittany, that you just didn't know if how you were conducting consultations, what you should be doing during these meetings. There's a lot more to planning than just being organized and executing a checklist. And I think that's the mistake that a lot of planners who are jumping into this industry make. And it's because a lot of more experienced planners are just telling them, well, just book a client and quote unquote wing it. And like you mentioned, Brittany, there are no do-overs. So we are basically using these engaged couples as guinea pigs for starting our wedding planning career. And that makes me incredibly sad for both the planner, because that's a lot of pressure, Britney. You mentioned being up at 2 a.m. questioning yourself if you were doing things right, but then also our couple for a day that they cannot do over and a day that they look back on every single year of their anniversary. Are they going to be looking back with joy and happiness or looking back thinking my wedding planner ruined everything? Like that's that's a lot. That's heavy. And Nikki, you know, when you decided to pursue certification, what were you hoping it would give you? Because I know by the time that you gained your certification, you had already been in the industry itself for decades. You were working at venues, you were doing a lot. So, what were you hoping that it would give you? And what was it that you felt like you actually needed?

SPEAKER_02 8:15

So it was actually a really unusual time in both my life and in the industry. Because when I decided to pursue my certification at the CWP Society, it was 2023. The entirety of the industry was still finding its footing after the pandemic, and I was in the middle of a big transition myself. I was moving from working for others to officially opening my own company. And even though, as you mentioned, I had those years of hands-on experience and plenty of vendor relationships, I was really looking for the validation and the structure as I stepped fully into a planning role from a business owner's perspective. I had to shift that mindset. And I didn't want to rely solely on instinct or what I had learned over the years. I wanted to confirm that I was doing things the right way as a planner. I had hoped that the certification would give me clearer frameworks, stronger language to communicate my value, and the confidence that I wasn't missing anything behind the scenes. But what had honestly surprised me was that it gave me exactly what I needed, but not in the way I expected. Taught me so much more, which is why I continued to pursue additional education with the CWP Society. Finding a mentor in both you and Lori helped me tremendously. From building my contracts and setting my pricing, uncovering gaps that I didn't realize existed as I made that transition to business owner, the education helped sharpen my decision making, strengthened my boundaries, and elevated how I ran my business. It may not have changed how I planned the wedding specifically, but it certainly helped change how I showed up with much more intention, clarity, and the confidence as a true professional.

SPEAKER_03 10:02

I honestly, when you say 2023, I feel like because you are so heavily educated with CWP, I feel like you've been a part of CD with CWP for so much longer. Like you took the certification and you've taken everything else since. So I'm like, yeah, and it keeps me around for decades now. It's like, oh no, she just gained her certification in 2023. But that's what an impact it made on you that you were like, oh no, give me more. I need more, I need more. Yeah. Was there a specific skill or gap that you were trying to fill knowing that you were going into that this transition, or was it something bigger than that?

SPEAKER_02 10:36

So I definitely feel like it was something bigger than just filling kind of a single gap for me personally. By the time I found the CWP Society, I had been planning weddings, as we've mentioned, for a couple decades. And I already had a previous certification. But what I realized was that not every organization and not every certification can actually align with your values. And that matters more the longer that you are in this industry.

SPEAKER_03 11:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:04

I wasn't just looking for how to do something. I was looking for an organization and a community that reflected both what I believe in as a planner and a business owner. I wanted the true support, the encouragement, accountability, and that continued education that can actually evolve with the industry. I found all of that and so much more within the CWP Society. But what really stood out to me was the sense of connection and the supportive community that I found. The shared standards, the ongoing conversations pushing me to grow, not just in my skills, but in my confidence, my leadership, and my clarity. I remember seeing two of the educators on a workshop in early 2024 talking about how they lived in different states, but that they were planner besties. And I was thinking, that's what I want. I wanted that level of community in a role that can feel so incredibly isolating at times. Through the CWP Society, I was lucky enough to meet Brittany, who is now one of my planner besties. And that relationship alone has been a game changer. I'm so incredibly grateful for the support, connection, and encouragement from both the CWPS community and Britney. It's made work feel so much. It's made this work feel far less lonely and so much more fulfilling for me.

SPEAKER_01 12:25

You're literally gonna make me cry. Like I feel the same way.

SPEAKER_03 12:29

I know, which again, I'm right there with you, Nikki. That finding that community was not what I expected. It wasn't what I was getting my certification for. But being able to get that out of you know our education and allowing us to be a better wedding planner on top of getting the community. It's it was just such a pleasant surprise for sure. Now, Brittany, I I want to bring this back to you because you know, I feel like a lot of planners worry that certification is just theory, meaning it's just a bunch of information and fluff that you're gonna fill my brain with, that it actually won't help me in the moment when a florist is running late or a family member is having a meltdown. How could the process and the certification actually show up for you on a real wedding day?

SPEAKER_01 13:16

Well, to start off, I don't believe that is just theory at all. I can personally attest to the CWP Society certification saving me in multiple situations I've dealt with on wedding days. And if you've joined us for weekly workshops, I have sprinkled in sometimes my personal experiences and touch on how the CWP society has changed my life. And I would say that one of the biggest aspects of the certification was learning how to prepare for everything before the wedding day even occurs, with things like communicating with the wedding pros or building an extremely detailed timeline and just in general leaving no stone left unturned so that by the time we get to the wedding day, I'm feeling extremely confident that I can lead the event. And the certification takes you through a multitude of situations that may arise on the wedding day itself. Um, even things that you may not think of, like family dynamics or late arrivals, and really teaches you how to problem solve and pivot to really ensure the wedding day continues to run smoothly. And like Nikki, I had a thirst for knowledge. I got all of my certifications. Like right after I got my first certification, I'm like, good, go into the master's, get my design consultant certification. So I really feel like all of these certifications are like different tools in your planning tool belt that you can use to plan and coordinate a wedding successfully.

SPEAKER_03 14:41

All that was just like good, good, good, goodness. Because you're right, what you do beforehand impacts how well a wedding day runs. So again, mixing that whole wing-get concept, because as certified wedding planners, we know that as stressful as our job is, the most, you know, in the top five most stressful jobs in the world, the wedding day itself is the easiest part of our job when we plan it well, when we do all of the before and the prep work that you mentioned. And if you are unfortunately just winging it, all of that prep work before you may not even be doing at all. And in fact, I know a lot of wedding planners, and I'm putting that in quotation marks, who aren't doing any type of prep work. I had a phone call from one of my go-to photographers who's also a dear friend, and she called, it was late, and she's like, I just had to call you because I had a wedding and I walk in and get ready, and there is a wedding planner on site. I did not realize they hired their wedding planner. So this wedding planner never got in touch with her before the wedding, never introduced herself, never coordinated the timeline with her. She was at she literally, quite literally just showed up on the day as a, I guess, a day of coordinator, which we all know does not actually exist. There's work that goes into being able to coordinate and coordinate the day well. So I'm so glad that she mentioned that. And I'm also glad that she sprinkled in and you mentioned our workshops because I feel like that goes two different ways. You mentioned that you've shared some of your personal stories in our workshops, and we all learn from that actually. We get to we have the opportunity to learn from what other planners are going through on top of what we learned in the certification. But I what I love about why you mentioned that, and it kind of ties into what Nikki mentioned earlier, and it's about that community. You feel safe enough with the CWP society community to be like, guys, I am dealing with this cuckoo for Coco Puffs couple. What do I do in this situation? Like you feel safe because you know how in some groups and organizations, when you ask a question, you immediately feel like that was such a stupid question. Why would you even ask that? I've seen it. It's and I've I've felt that myself. It's not fun. But I love that you mentioned that you've shared your struggles and you've shared some issues that you've dealt with with couples and you felt safe in doing so. And that all boils down to the fact that we have a really phenomenal community. So I'm glad that you both mentioned that. Now, I do want to talk to you both about the shift. The first time you realized that you weren't just reacting anymore, you were actually leading. Do you either of you remember a specific moment where you felt that change? And Nikki, I'll start with you.

SPEAKER_02 17:22

Sure. So for me, the shift wasn't necessarily something I noticed right away. It was actually pointed out to me by one of my day of coordination assistants. We had worked together for a couple of years, so she knew me pretty well, and she had seen me in a lot of different scenarios. One day, almost off-handedly, she kind of mentioned that there was a noticeable change in the way that I was showing up, how I was presenting myself and taking action. That comment really stayed with me because it meant a lot coming from someone like her. Because she and I had worked so closely, and she had worked with me both before and after my certification. So her seeing that shift really kind of resonated with me. It made me realize that it was, I wasn't just reacting anymore or putting out the fires. I was really leading with intention. And I was much more decisive, more grounded, and just overall more confident in my role as the planner. So that shift didn't just change how I felt internally. It changed for the people around me that experienced working with me.

SPEAKER_03 18:24

I love that it came from someone so close to you. You know, because again, like you mentioned, they they've seen us at our best, they've seen us at our worst. So the fact that she noticed that change to me speaks volumes about what an impact it really made on you. Um, Brittany, what about you?

SPEAKER_01 18:40

For me, I would say the first time I really felt that change was when I planned and executed my second full service couple, not my first one, because prior to receiving my certifications, I had only planned and coordinated just one full service couple, mostly just month of coordination couples. And while that wedding for my full service couple was successful and, you know, the couple was happy with my services, I kind of felt like Nikki, when she was talking about first pursuing uh getting her certification, where, you know, she wasn't sure if she was doing things the right way. You know, I've talked about a little bit. I just felt like something was missing. And I really felt that I could still be giving my couples a better experience. And in comparison, you know, after booking my first full service couple after receiving my certification and master's, I really felt like all the puzzle pieces were locking in. Like the entire experience with this couple felt different than the first, in that I was providing a more hands-on approach, um, where their couple had their full confidence in me that I could take care of them every step of the way. And not only that, but I was really able to build a dream team of professionals that made the planning process so smooth and helped me lead the event with confidence. And I can probably say that I'm still friends with this couple. We even sent each other Christmas cards. So it was just definitely a whole different experience than the first time I did a full service wedding.

SPEAKER_03 20:03

Oh, I love that so much. And I'm sure you probably also weren't waking up at 2 a.m. in the middle of the night planning about things with the full service couple because that's a lot of full service planning. I I come up with my best ideas at like 4 a.m. and I'm like writing them down, but at least those are ideas and not like stressors. Right. You know, one thing that I hear from planners who maybe aren't quite certified is I don't know when I don't know. Kind of what you mentioned earlier, Brittany, where they're managing these weddings, things are going fine, but there's that nagging feeling, like you mentioned, Brittany, that something is missing. I am missing something in this process. How did certification help you see what you couldn't see before?

SPEAKER_02 20:43

So I'll go. Um, and I hear that all too often. It's exactly how I think we all kind of feel early on in our career with wedding planning. By obtaining my certification with the CWP Society, it helped me to find those little gaps that I didn't realize existed. Since I've been planning weddings for years and things were going fine, I also didn't know that I may have been missing things. There were small aspects and larger ones like contracts, pricing structures, even my own packages and certain timeline details. I began to fully consider each one and adjust my standards to align with what the industry needed, not what I had always done. CWP Society gave me that framework and the language to identify those gaps and handle them confidently. I wasn't just going about checking boxes. It was about building systems, seeing the blind spots, and knowing that I was covering everything my couples and vendors needed, even the things that I hadn't realized was missing prior. It completely shifted how I approach planning and how I lead on wedding days because I knew that I wasn't leaving anything to chance anymore.

SPEAKER_03 21:57

What I love about what you mentioned, Nikki, you You said that you adjusted your standards to align with what the industry needed, not necessarily what you have always done. And I think that's so important for us to pick apart a little bit because a lot of planners who are just going into this industry and winging it are unintentionally hurting the wedding planning industry. They are hurting our value by charging well below the industry standard. They are hurting our reputations because they are coming into weddings unprepared, not being team players, and venues and vendors are getting that feeling of, I don't want to work with wedding planners anymore. If this is what it's like to work with wedding planners, sign me out. And now venues are having quote unquote coordinators and we're they're trying to replace us because they've dealt with so many planners who were doing things that were not up to the industry standards that you mentioned. So I'm so glad that you mentioned that. And even we talked about this a couple of weeks ago, that may have been last week, actually, upon us recording this, we talked about planner code and how there are certain things that, as planners, there's a code of like, don't give away too much information because you're taking us out of the equation when you make social media posts and blog posts. If you're telling couples how to plan their wedding, they're going to think, why should they hire us? And when planners are unintentionally doing this, they're breaking planner code because they don't know the standards that the industry needs. And the only way that you will know this is if you take the time to invest in yourself and gain your certification. And we talked about this, uh, I think it was a podcast with Crystal Daily, who also values education and has been certified and been a part of multiple different avenues for education. Not every certification is created equally.

SPEAKER_02 23:54

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 23:54

Not every certification is has a goal of elevating the whole industry. But we do, you know, obviously. I think it's so important that you mentioned that, and I'm glad you did. So thank you. Now, Brittany, looking back at your journey to certification, what surprised you most about what changed for you afterward?

SPEAKER_01 24:15

Yeah, the biggest surprise for me was the support from the CWP society community that came with the certification. And, you know, you were talking about Chrissy, you brought up a great point about how we feel safe in this community to really share our thoughts, ask questions that may seem silly to other communities. And when I first started my business, I quickly found that unfortunately most of the wedding professionals in my area personally were really competitive. They really lacked a sense of community. Like when I started out, I was going to any and every networking event or wedding show, really just trying to network with others. And on multiple occasions, I straight up had wedding planners stop conversing with me after I said I was a wedding planner too. They saw me as competition and it was so discouraging. And fortunately, the reason I found the CWP Society was because I came across a local networking uh group post from Hayley Beard, one of our fellow members. And she was inviting planners to join a public CWP society event to learn more. And so before even starting my certification, this one event really resonated with me. I think it was right before 2023. It was like December of 2022, if I'm remembering correctly. And it really just resonated in me because Lori and Chrissy were so passionate about helping others and wanting us to do better as a wedding industry. And so that's what helped me take the plunge and getting my certification. And then from there, I started participating, you know, as I said previously in the weekly workshops, on the forums, and really just realized how everyone in this community genuinely cares for one another. And I felt and I still today continue to feel so happy to call this community another family to me. And I just know they're always there for me to celebrate and support me.

SPEAKER_03 26:06

First, I have to say, I'm sorry that you experienced that with the other wedding planners, quite literally stopping the conversation with you. No, it's crazy. It's crazy because it's such a beautiful thing to find someone who is in it with you and who knows our crazy. No one knows our crazy, like we know our crazy, and to have someone to support, but to immediately shut you down. But I I sadly know that feeling also because I was hit with that. And I remember after getting my certification, I was thinking, I am never gonna treat another planner like that. Like I'm going to be like Haley, welcome them in, invite them to come be a part of our events. So I'm I'm so sorry that happened to you. Now, Nikki, I want to get specific. What was one thing that you do differently on wedding days now that you didn't do before? And how has that changed the experience for you and your business, but also your client?

SPEAKER_02 26:57

So, one thing that I do differently now on wedding days is that I always have at least one of my day of coordination assistants with me, and we go into the day knowing what each of our responsibilities are. It might sound so simple, but having that support completely changes how smoothly the day runs. Our timelines are so much more thorough now and detailed than they used to be. So every vendor, wedding party, and couple knows exactly what's happening and when. Another big difference is the level of trust and confidence from other industry professionals. When they see that my team and I are certified, they know that that credibility means that they can communicate more openly, decisions happen faster, and ultimately it just creates a calmer, more seamless experience for the couples. Everything just feels more intentional, less reactive, and a lot more enjoyable for everyone involved.

SPEAKER_03 27:50

It's so funny. I remember because I help out a one of my local venues with their tours and their bookings, and I also get the final day of details to then pass off to our event manager. And there was a wedding planner who I said, hey, I need a copy of the floor plan, the timeline, insurance, blah, blah, blah, all the normal things. And the timeline that she sent over was just a photography timeline. It didn't have anything that the venue would need to know about like arrival times for the vendors, when the rentals were coming in, things like that that the venue would need to know. So naturally I was like, Hey, you know, this is other information that I need, but I would also love to invite you to be part of the CWP Society, send her some information. And I think probably six months later, we had another event where she was a planner and her timeline was A, it was time my genius. B it's so much more detailed, and I was like, she got certified. Well done, well done. So, Brittany, I think there's this misconception that confident planners don't feel pressure. But confidence isn't about not feeling it, it's about knowing how to move through that pressure. How did your relationship with pressure change after certification?

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Yeah, Chrissy, I totally agree with you. And I believe that no matter how much education and experience you have, there's always going to be pressure there because we're carrying the dreams of a couple's wedding experience on our shoulders, right? You know, that's a lot to bear. But what really changed for me and helped me minimize that pressure was the reassurance of knowing that I'm not alone in bearing this pressure. You know, just because we're steering the ship doesn't mean we don't have that crew of wedding vendors to navigate with us. Um, you know, we have the entire team and the trust of the couple and their friends and family to support us. I believe that the certification, you know, teaches more than just specific scenarios you might come across on the wedding day. There are an infinite number of things that can go wrong. And the certification taught me things like how to manage, you know, what may seem like little things, but in reality can make a huge impact on the wedding experience, like how my facial expressions and emotions come across, how to direct the vendors in pivotal moments. You know, this kind of connects back to what we were previously discussing, you know, no matter uh, no amount of experience can prepare you for to handle unexpected situations. And I really want to tie this into a quick story about an extreme circumstance that happened on my couple's wedding day last year to really just get this point across. And so to kind of set up the scenario, you know, we had a wedding that took place in a in a restaurant, and the grandmother of the groom owned the restaurant. So one half with the bar was being used by cocktail hour. There was another wall that was separating the dining area, and then the patio had the dancing area. And there was a whole wall with glass uh doors so that you can see into the tent, but it was just, you know, everything was separate and blocked off. And so we were having dinner, everything was going great. The vendors just finished eating and we were chatting about the next steps of, you know, going into speeches. And some of the guests were just mingling and dancing with the jazz music going on. Suddenly, Uncle Steve passes out, boom, hits the ground right there on the dance floor. And the wife was a deer in headlights, you know, and I would be lying if I would say I was not anxious or worried at all. In fact, my first response internally was like, Oh my gosh, is this man having a heart attack? You know, as I previously stated, we've been taught to remain calm through that pressure and continue coordinating the wedding as best we can without alerting the alerting the couple and the guests to any problems. And this is where that amazing vendor team really comes in handy because we had that photo video team shielding Uncle Steve. You know, they were blocking the view from the window. So nobody knew what was going on. The doors were closed, so everyone was still mingling inside. Um, the DJ and I called 911, and I was gracefully but quickly walking over to the wait staff and being like, hey, can you please just take the drink orders from the uh table so that guests aren't going to the bar? You know, let's go ahead and move right into the speeches um as soon as possible when the EMTs arrive so we can just keep going and uh you not interrupt the wedding. And fortunately, this all happened within just around five to seven minutes. The the ambulance came quickly, and nobody in the dining area, including the couple at their sweetheart table, knew what was going on until the flashing lights were in the windows. I literally saw the couple like do a double take outside and I started walking up to them and they're like, wait, are they here for us? And then I'm like, I so I informed them. I was like, Yeah, there was a situation, you know, I reassured them we we've already taken care of it. Uncle Steve was taken to the hospital. He was diagnosed as pre-diabetic and he himself was not aware. You know, sometimes just things happen outside of our control. And we and the vendor team successfully navigated the event, uh, the events throughout the rest of the evening with no other hiccups. And the couple still had an amazing experience. They gave us five stars. Nobody would have known with all the social media posts, with all of these pictures, that anything had gone wrong. So, again, this is just a very extreme example, but it's a real possibility that you never know something can happen. And all the more reason why we need to get an education on how to remain calm under this pressure. And it's really imperative to the success of any event.

SPEAKER_03 33:06

I'm so glad that you share this story. And I do want to say, I don't even think this is an extreme situation. This is a situation that you just need to be prepared for. We quite literally have one of our phenomenal certified educators, Brianne Ackerlin. This is all she teaches about are these situations because it is inevitable. Things like this are going to happen. So we want to make sure our planners are aware of certain situations that can happen. How do you handle that? I guarantee if you didn't have to call the ambulance, they wouldn't have known anything happened. And because they, like I said, they only notice it when they're like, wait, is this ambulance here for us? Like that kind of took me. But I but gosh, you're exactly right. These are those situations that because of your education, because you knew the calm under pressure, how your facial expressions were, your body language, and also that, Britney, props to you for how you navigated all of those vendors so quickly. And again, that's all because of your certification and your education. Because we know there's this reputation of planners who are just like running around like chickens with their head cut off. And they think they want the drama, they want the attention, they want them to look at the planner and look how busy she is. That's not how you should be. You should be cool, calm because everyone's looking to you for how they should react. So because you were calm in that moment, Brittany, everyone else was able to remain calm as well. So pat yourself on the back for a job well done with that particular situation. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 34:29

Yeah, and I've had several events actually where, you know, something similar has happened. So, like you said, Chrissy, it's not that uncommon, unfortunately. And it is something that we all need to be prepared for. I can remember three off the top of my head over the last few years alone.

SPEAKER_03 34:44

Now, here's something that I don't think we talked about enough, and that is the cost of winning it. Even when things go well, there's a weight to not being sure. You know, what did that feel like for you if if you felt that? You know, I know you both kind of jumped on the CWP train quite early, but what did it feel like for you when it actually lifted that that that weight of not being sure? And I'll start with you, Nikki.

SPEAKER_02 35:08

Well, we're planners, not wingers is one of my favorite Lorian Chrissyisms. But I couldn't agree more. I just think that so many planners feel like this, but we all feel some sort of a shame and feel like we have to keep it more hushed. That uncertainty leading to judgment, we're just afraid of it. Like you said about, you know, the social media aspects and everything. I'm glad the CWP Society is such a safe space for everybody. Because early in my career, even when weddings would go well, I mean, there was always that low-level weight of that uncertainty. Kind of like a nagging feeling that maybe I'd missed something, like Brittany was saying earlier, or that something could go wrong, or that I wasn't fully in control at every moment. That uncertainty didn't just end with one wedding, it could follow you to the next one. And the mental, emotional, and even the physical toll of carrying the weight over and over is exhausting in a role that's already so demanding on us. When I got certified and built stronger systems, timelines, and processes, that weight lifted. Suddenly, I just knew that I could trust that I had accounted for the details, that I had the right support systems in place, and that I wasn't just reacting, but I was leading. Wedding days felt lighter, more joyful, and so much more fun for me. And that calm energy translates directly to my clients. They can relax knowing that our team has everything under control. And now I actually can enjoy the day alongside them rather than constantly worrying in the background.

SPEAKER_03 36:46

I love that you mentioned, Nikki, the physical toll of that weight, because that is something that I don't think a lot of people realize is that it that it does mess with your mental, it messes with your emotions, and all that ties into your body physically and how exhausting that can be. And this job is already hard enough, but when you have that extra weight of am I doing this right? It just can really bring you down. And I've also seen careers end because of it, because they didn't get that education that they needed. Brittany, how do you feel about that?

SPEAKER_01 37:19

I'm a little bit more on the type A side. I can be a perfectionist, and any little thing that wasn't perfect, like even if it went unnoticed to everyone else on the wedding day, it would still nag at me and really tug at my anxiety. And I've always been someone with high anxiety because I'm just in general a huge people pleaser. And this is gonna sound kind of silly, but I'm channeling my inner Elsa all the time. I'm like, let it go, you know, and I'm like, you know, I'm just trying to get the weight of all this pressure off of me so that uh, you know, to be perfect so that it doesn't overtake me. And, you know, letting go of this weight doesn't mean to forget all of these challenges. You know, each and every one of them is still a learning experience that we can grow from. And this is something I didn't just come up with by myself or learn through my experiences, but through receiving my education and having that support. And so I went from winging it to owning it in every decision I make. And it's really helped me overcome the pressures of being a wedding planner.

SPEAKER_03 38:20

What I love the most with the two of you, you guys mentioned it earlier that you guys are wedding planner besties, but I want people to know you guys actually live in different states, but you built that connection through the CWP Society. Can you tell me, you know, what that actually means for you, what it looks like in practice, since you guys don't live anywhere near each other? How do you say connected and support each other from a distance?

SPEAKER_01 38:43

Yeah, I, you know, I just love Nikki so much, and she is one of my favorite people in the world. And one of the big stress relievers in this industry is having a planner bestie who really just understands all of the little nuances that comes with this career. You know, Chrissy, you touched on it a little bit how, you know, we understand all the little things that we go through as a wedding planner. And when Nikki and I participate in the weekly workshops that the CWP Society has, you know, we went from conversing in the chat to them emailing each other, texting, hopping on calls, just to get, you know, get each other's opinions on a business strategy or just really venting all our little experiences, whether good or bad, and celebrate and um support one another. And we've just really built a strong bond that we can where we can hop into each other's office hours to do even just independent work alongside each other and hold ourselves accountable in being productive while also conversing about our daily lives. It's just really a good mental boost. And we're always learning new things from each other. And I can confidently say that Nikki has changed my business for the better. And you know, and that we're both lifelong learners, we're thriving off each other. And I just don't know what I do without Nikki to support me, honestly.

SPEAKER_03 39:59

You're so sweet. That she's you know, she's made me better. It kind of reminds me of the wicked for good. Like my I have been changed for good.

SPEAKER_02 40:08

Oh, that one's right. Aw, well, yay, yes. I couldn't agree more. I'm gonna echo what some of Brittany said because I mean, she's just an amazing planner bestie of mine. And I was so excited to do this podcast with both of you, one of my mentors, my planner bestie. And even though, like you mentioned, we are in different states, I'm in Illinois, she's in Virginia, the CWP Society has made it possible for us to connect regularly and just really support each other. We share a lot of the same company ideals, and we started connecting, as Brittany mentioned, on workshops early on after I joined. She hosted a call, actually, I think it was in 2024, where she just, you know, kind of put it out there on the chat. Several other CWP members, you know, we all hopped on a call and we were just talking about our days and everything else. And it just kind of took off from there. A few months later, Brittany and I were connecting further and bouncing ideas off of each other, like she said, kind of emailing back and forth and just supporting one another ever since. Now we do hop on regular Google Meet sessions at least once a month for our working day calls, where we're tackling things like updating contracts, reviewing our packages, and navigating software that we both use, like Timeline Genius, Rock Paper Coin, and Triple C. Think of it this way: anyone who's ever worked in an office just knows how different it feels to have someone focusing alongside you. Someone who you can ask a quick question for, hey, I have a question, or get a second opinion from when you need to. So even from a distance, it really feels like we're side by side some days working in our office. And I'll be super transparent, okay? Brittany's a little younger than me, and she's a lot more tech savvy because of it. And I'm so grateful for that. But beyond that, it's just such an incredible experience to have someone who truly understands the challenges of this business, celebrates my wins with me, and holds me accountable. That kind of connection is rare. And honestly, I don't know how I'd navigate some of the ups and downs in this industry without her.

SPEAKER_01 42:19

I love it.

SPEAKER_03 42:21

Now, if someone is listening right now and they recognize themselves in the conversation that we've been having, they're doing the work, they care deeply, but they still feel like they're figuring it out as they go. What would you say to them, Nikki? I'll start with you.

SPEAKER_02 42:34

Please, please, please do yourself a favor and join the CWP Society. It is so much more than a certification. It's more than a piece of paper and a badge for your website. It's truly a community of passionate men and women who genuinely care and want to see you succeed. They want to lift you up with them, not in spite of them. So jump in feet first, attend all of the member workshops, and just take in all of the courses. I know firsthand how valuable every single one of them are. And being a part of this family, the support system has been a total game changer for me, both personally and professionally.

SPEAKER_01 43:13

I couldn't have said it better than Nikki myself. You know, be proactive and get your education so that you can not only improve how you conduct your business, but also elevate your knowledge of the wedding industry. The Certified Wedding Planner Society is a life-changing education, and you'll never feel like you're winging it again.

SPEAKER_03 43:31

Thank you guys both so much for being here. What I kind of gauge from this entire conversation is that confidence isn't something you wait to feel. It's something you build. And you build it by learning what you don't know, by understanding the why behind what you do, and by stepping into the kind of education that gives you the foundation you can stand on. No matter what happens on wedding day. If you've been waiting to feel ready, I want you to hear this clearly. Need it. You don't have to wonder if you're doing it right, and you don't have to carry that weight alone. The CWP Society exists for exactly this reason: to give you the knowledge, the systems, and the confidence that comes from real education and professional certification. This isn't about adding letters to your name, although that's a perk. But it's about becoming the planner who walks into every wedding day knowing exactly who you are and what you're capable of. So if you're ready to stop guessing and start owning it, go to cwpssociety.com, explore the certification path, pick which one works best for you, and see what's waiting for you on the other side of this decision. Because the wedding industry needs planners who lead with clarity, confidence, and professionalism. And that can be a planner like you. Again, thank you both Nikki and Brittany for being a part of it. And thank you for listening to the Wedding Planner Society podcast. We'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_00 44:53

And before you go, we've got a little something just for our podcast listeners. If you're ready to elevate your career as a wedding planner or coordinator, you can use code podcast to receive$50 off the executive certification program. This code is valid until the next episode releases, so be sure to take advantage while it's available. This offer can't be combined with any other discounts. Visit CWP Society.com to learn more.