Ever wonder how much control you truly hold over your own life? Brace yourself as we reveal the secrets to harnessing the power of belief and agency, with our very special guest, Whitney. Her insights on how our minds mould our successes will leave you astounded. We also venture into understanding how to transform personal adversities, such as job loss, into opportunities for growth, all while exploring the enlightening concept of logotherapy.
In the second half of our riveting discussion, Whitney provides practical wisdom on plotting your own growth trajectory. She shares inspiring anecdotes from her life and encourages listeners to set realistic, achievable goals, and to use reflection and self-talk as powerful tools for self-improvement. Get ready to cultivate a growth mindset, embrace change, and discover the profound impact of your choices. Don’t miss out on this chance to learn from Whitney’s experiences - be sure to follow her on LinkedIn for more inspiration.
Ever wonder how much control you truly hold over your own life? Brace yourself as we reveal the secrets to harnessing the power of belief and agency, with our very special guest, Whitney. Her insights on how our minds mould our successes will leave you astounded. We also venture into understanding how to transform personal adversities, such as job loss, into opportunities for growth, all while exploring the enlightening concept of logotherapy.
In the second half of our riveting discussion, Whitney provides practical wisdom on plotting your own growth trajectory. She shares inspiring anecdotes from her life and encourages listeners to set realistic, achievable goals, and to use reflection and self-talk as powerful tools for self-improvement. Get ready to cultivate a growth mindset, embrace change, and discover the profound impact of your choices. Don’t miss out on this chance to learn from Whitney’s experiences - be sure to follow her on LinkedIn for more inspiration.
Speaker 1:
So this is fun. I knew we would have a good time. I want to talk about dreams. I want to talk about disruption and what you've observed that holds people back from fulfilling the potential that they've got.
Speaker 2:
I think what I have found most holds people back is what is going on in their mind. So I don't want to diminish the fact that people have different starting points. People have different levels of privilege where they were born, what time they were born, what gender they were born all those different things. So I don't want to diminish that. But we all know people who have been born with very, very little and accomplished so so much. And then we know people that, from a privileged standpoint, have been born with so much and accomplished so little.
Speaker 2:
And so the differentiating factor is what do they believe about themselves? What do they believe about possibility? What do they believe? And are they agentic? Do they believe that they can affect the future? Do they believe that they can change? Do they believe that they can grow? Do they believe that growth is their default setting or don't they?
Speaker 2:
And so, if we, that's the differentiating factor and it always is going to come. You know, if you look at yourself and things that you might have wanted to have achieved and haven't quite yet and I look at as well you know we can look at some percentage of this is the system, some percentages of this is the people around us. But what percentages mean? And almost always there is I have far more control over the outcome than I think I do that willingness to take 100% responsibility, to act and not be acted upon. That is always going to be that differentiating factor. So so again, don't want to diminish the starting point, but but it ultimately comes down to how we're choosing to think about ourselves and how we're choosing to think about the world.
Speaker 1:
So I'm smiling because the the masterclass that we provide to our clients, our members, is called making your own weather, and it's all about agency. Yes, it's raining, yes, it's cold, yes, it's whatever. I'm not denying the reality of what is, and you can't control that. The weather is what it is. But you've always got control over your attitude and you've always got control over your actions. You have agency every moment of every day. My question for you, whitney, is do you believe, or what's your experience with people, being able to change their sense of agency, or do people have a pretty hardwired? If I don't believe I can change, I can't. Or can people be taught? No, actually, you can change. You do have more agency than you.
Speaker 2:
You know, I think the answer is yes, absolutely. I mean, I think about my own life. I do have certain wiring, and so it's going to be easier for some people than others, but, at the same time, I do believe that we can choose to change. We can make a decision that we're going to be 100% responsible for our life, that our brains are actually wired to change. We have the equipment to do that, and so it's a question of are we going to make the decision to do it? So, yes, we can. Every single person on this planet can, because that's how we were built and constructed, and we need to make the decision that we're going to do it, and for some of us it's going to be harder than others, but we still can do it.
Speaker 2:
Yeah we can choose to change.
Speaker 1:
That is such that that's great.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I feel like I'm speaking in generality. So if you no, no, no, that's a great. I'm embracing that term.
Speaker 1:
I think that's a really cool term we can choose to change. You can choose to change and I think that that's an epiphany for a lot of people. And just thinking about disrupt yourself and things that are disruptive, sometimes the way even the title implies you can disrupt yourself. Oftentimes we find again because of where we tend to meet people is in job search, they've been laid off or whatever's happened. They didn't choose the disruption, but they've turned it into a bit of a finding exercise, so I wouldn't have chosen this for myself on its face. But what's the good that can come out of this? And it's sort of a big find that creates hope, optimism, future, not looking back. I'm curious how that fits into how you think about stuff.
Speaker 2:
Oh, absolutely. I mean, I think it's interesting because I have lost a job and I think 25, probably to 30% of our population has lost a job at least. And my hypothesis actually is that at some level we knew it was time for us to do something different, but we weren't quite ready to get there, for whatever reason, and the universe kind of moved us along. And I also find and I think this was the case for me is that we often, when we do lose a job, when we look back, if we're willing to be agentic and say, okay, not, why am I here, why did this happen? But now that I'm here, what do I want to do with this? How do I?
Speaker 2:
want to turn this into a gift. How am I going to choose to make meaning of this? And this goes a little bit to some a priori assumptions that we might have about the universe. If we believe and I do believe that we are on this planet to develop a character, to develop as a human being, then I can take a job loss and make meaning of it in a way that this is a gift for me to grow as a human being and in the end, I will be a better person than I was when this happened, if I choose to turn my constraint into a tool of creation.
Speaker 1:
Yeah so this is very in line with, like Victor Frankel, right in man's search for meaning and logo therapy, which is finding meaning in things which is different than finding blame or other avenues, other avenues, finding why am I a victim versus what's the meaning. How can I grow, how can I serve in the midst of what I've been presented with that is so empowering for people? I think that is like one of life's biggest unlocks is finding your purpose in this versus other alternatives that people could choose.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and you know, what I found for me, bob and I suspect this is true for most of us is that there are certain places where we're actually really good at having a growth mindset, of making meaning of oh this happened and this was tough, and here's what I figured out and here's what I learned. And we all not all, but many of us also have Achilles heels where there's certain areas or certain pockets of our lives where, when something difficult happens, it's very challenging to go into that place of growth mindset. So that's, those are the real growth edges for us in terms of our as a human being and character. And so I think it's very much a continuum, like we talk about growth mindset, but I think we all have a growth mindset until we don't. And so it's right where we want to give ourselves compassion and say, okay, I in this, in this particular arena, I don't have a growth mindset.
Speaker 2:
So what do I want to do here? And also, I've been thinking a lot about compassion not self pity, but compassion and saying I don't have a growth mindset here, and so I there, probably for good reason. There was something that happened in my childhood that made it so I didn't. But now, what again? Not why, but what do I want to do that with this? Because that allows us to be an agent, not be a victim, and and move forward as as as people.
Speaker 1:
It's, it's I'm probably being slowed getting to your party here, but you even, as you were describing sort of this edgy things is the opportunity to enter into an S curve in that arena, that area of my life, but with the understanding that I'm not going to have mastery, in fact I'm not even going to be in a flow state for maybe a while, but it's just the fact of starting and just embracing it, like I'm just going to make a little baby steps and we'll get there when we get there. But what I'm not going to do is opt out of being on that S curve.
Speaker 2:
Right, I'm not going to give up. I won't give up. I think that's that's the key is like I'm going to, I'm going to persist. And you know, one of the things that will often happen with, you know, a new S curve, that is that, you know, because it's so uncomfortable and it feels painful, in some ways, of being uncertain.
Speaker 2:
And you know, when you're looking for a new job there, we have to ask ourselves the question of okay, so is this painful and does this mean that it's the wrong S curve because I'm super uncomfortable, or does it just mean I haven't been here long enough to have enough data to know if it's going to make sense or not? And I think that's where you know our loved ones, where our truth tellers, where good coaching, where the career club can come in, of saying, actually, if I look at all your strengths you know you're, you're strategic, I look at all those things, it does make sense for you to be here, but you just haven't been here long enough. So persist a little bit longer, get a little bit more data before you give up and decide this S curve or this, this opportunity or this track isn't for you.
Speaker 1:
That's a great insight and where we see that playing out a lot is by getting people in community. So people are at different places on the S curve and so being able to see you know, susan, who's been in this just a little bit longer, who can be empathetic and say, whitney, I know how you feel, I felt the exact same way. What I found was and you're going to find it too just don't give up. And you know, some days we're the encourager, some days we need the encouragement. But that's, for me, is the beauty of being in community, so that you don't just get lost in the fear, the doubt. You know whatever things might be trying to get you off that curve and to quit. Do you find that, in kind of personal development, how important community really is?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I mean, I think it's it's it's important. So so you're. I think, when I think about community, I think of it in a number of different ways. There can be the community of you're in on a team with other people, but I think if you're looking for a job, then maybe not the community, but you're creating these cohorts and that's why you we talk about different kinds of diversity you want to have. You know, it's going to be a lot harder for you from a coaching standpoint of if everybody's at the launch point everybody just lost their job that's difficult because everybody's having the same experience. But, as you just pointed out, if I've got some people who are a little bit further along, they figured out what their message is. They're in the sweet spot. They're now just in that, finding and identifying the right position for them, or they're they've actually now taken a job and they're, you know, right before they started. So they're in mastery. There's that stabilizing influence of having people at different points along that S curve. So I think in that instance the community is important.
Speaker 2:
And then the community in terms of having true tellers in our lives of saying I know, you lost your job and this feels absolutely horrible, but it doesn't mean that you're not worthy. It doesn't mean that you're not worthwhile, it doesn't mean that you don't matter. And that's where the community of family and friends becomes very, very important, because when we lose a job, it's a very fragile place, it's a very. Our identity has completely been dismantled at some level because work is so much a part of our identity and we really do not only need that community of okay, here's a little bit of, a little bit of a. You know, here's the process, the functional part of doing this but the loved ones around us to shore us up and help us feel like, no, you still matter. It's just that you're in a, a liminal space and you're, you're going to figure it out. I know you can figure it out.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, and that's really spot on. And it's yes at the onset of the process, but the way I say it is, the road to yes is littered with no. So there's a lot of rejection that goes on along the way and so you know we talk, we use a little cross stick about keeping even keel. K E E L know that you're going to land. Emotional ups and downs are part of the ride. Expect the best from yourself and from others, and the? L is let go of the past being angry and the task to size anger is bitterness and I think it's.
Speaker 1:
Nelson Mandela bitterness is like swallowing poison and waiting for your enemy to die. So you just, you've got to let go of the past. You've got to be you know future forward. We need that for the whole duration, because it is a very bumpy ride getting to the next role and trying to do that by yourself tends to be challenging for people.
Speaker 2:
Oh, I wouldn't you argue that it's pretty much impossible to do it by yourself? I mean, the college children has no shoes. It's very difficult to identify what your strengths are. It's very difficult to figure out what your message is. I mean, have you ever met anybody who can do that job search by themselves?
Speaker 1:
I haven't. The issue is you just helping people understand this is going to get you to where you want to be in a better way, in a faster way. But when people are in job search, there's a lot of fear associated with it?
Speaker 2:
Oh yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:
There's a lot of stress, well, there's fear, confusion I don't even know what to do because it's not even a defined process there's shame, which is very key, and there's anger and upset. So in all, those kind of spire and crop up at different levels in different times, but the reality of just being under financial pressure that people feel and why aren't you investing in something? Because I'm afraid to, because financially I don't feel like I'm in a place where I can do that and so people would acknowledge the benefits. There's just a fear of stepping out.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah, it's quite a cocktail. It's quite a cocktail, yeah, it is.
Speaker 1:
I want to be respectful of your time because this is amazing With. I want to think just a little bit about action steps. So, yes, if we can agree and somebody listening to this podcast or watching us on YouTube is like that sounds really inspiring, but I still feel kind of stuck. What are just one, two, three kind of practical things, whitney, that you might encourage somebody that they could do pretty much today to start to make progress to the life that they really want to be living?
Speaker 2:
Okay, yeah. So I would say the first thing is to draw out the S-curve that we talked about and to see where you are and, if you're at the launch point of the curve, to just know that this is normal and that, in fact, you're growing really quickly. You just can't see it. And so to pull out a picture of yourself when you were really young and look at it and say I wouldn't beat up this five-year-old, I wouldn't beat up this eight-year-old. Why am I beating up myself right now? And just say I'm doing this new thing and I'm feeling really uncomfortable and this is normal and it's going to be okay. So that would be the first thing that I would encourage people to do.
Speaker 2:
The second thing would be is sometimes, when we're in that place of confusion and I'm not sure what to do, we start to set two big of goals, and so I would harness the power of dopamine. Dopamine kicks in when you get this upside surprise. And so if you're thinking to yourself, well, I'm going to reach out to five people today and look for a job, maybe it's not five people. Maybe I'm going to draft a really bad draft of an email that I want to send to someone. I'm going to check it on chat GPT, have someone else look at it, and I'm going to send it to someone that feels somewhat safe to send it to, so that you're making it even smaller. Give yourself such small goals that will only take you a couple of minutes just to start to build that momentum and build that confidence.
Speaker 2:
And then the third thing that I would really encourage you to do is, if you're not already, go outside and exercise, take a walk, be outdoors for even 15 minutes, and I'm going to give you four thing is to be aware of your language that you're using, of.
Speaker 2:
I have to, or I'm bad at your language. The power of your words is what creates your reality, and so use words like I choose. If you want to use the words I am that I am smart or I am figuring this out, I haven't figured it out yet. And so really be aware of your self talk, and if you find yourself using self talk that isn't positive, say oh, I just noticed I'm using not positive self talk. Don't beat yourself up, but just be aware of it. And so those would be my four suggestions of things that you can do today, right now, that will help you have that mindset that you want and need to move off the launch point of this curve and go into your next gig, your next job, your next opportunity which, if you will use this as an opportunity, this constraint as a tool of creation, it will allow you to be more of who you are and turn into possibility and an even happier life than you currently have, because you took this opportunity and made it and and and used it as a gift.
Speaker 1:
Wow, really, I can't do better than that. I'm going to end on a very, very high note. I think I could talk to you for hours and hours. There's so much that you're offering, so much value, that you're delivering to individuals, to companies, to your clients. If people want to learn more about you and your company, what's the best way to do that?
Speaker 2:
I think the best way is. We have a website. It's the disruptionadvisorscom. If you want to learn more about me generally, you can listen to the podcast, but a good starting place is to go just to our website and poke around. We have certification and smart growth. We do coaching, we do offsites. We have a tool and assessment that allows you to see where you are on the S curve and also see what the weather is like and assess if it's conducive to growth. Those are all some just different ways that we could engage.
Speaker 1:
Awesome. I would just throw in please follow Whitney on LinkedIn. I think you've got 1.1 billion followers, 1.8 million, I think. Seriously, I've really enjoyed following you. You post regularly. It's always encouraging, uplifting, but instructive. I find great value in that. Thank you so much for spending some time with us today.
Speaker 2:
Thank you for having me, Bob.
Speaker 1:
No, thank you. Thanks everyone for watching. If you're watching this on YouTube, please subscribe and comment. If you're listening to this on audio on your favorite podcast platform, please rate and review. It really does help With that, Whitney. Thank you again. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your week. Thank you, I know you're going to find it. You've got all you need, Matt. It's time for.