Parents of the Year
We were never given a manual on how to parent. It is easy to get overwhelmed to know the right thing to do. There is so much contradictory information out there and everyone has their own advice. Parenting is a rewarding but messy, confusing, infuriating, guilt-inducing, and overwhelming journey. While it's easy to get lost, Andrew Stewart, a real dad, and Dr. Caroline Buzanko, a real mom, child psychologist, and parenting expert (who also happens to be married to Andrew) will help you get back on track. In each episode, Andrew and Caroline have open and honest chats about everything parenting. Join them in honesty, laughter, and tears (Caroline is a bit of a cry baby) as they help you navigate this journey of parenting. And, every so often, you may get some gems of expert advice. Our goal is to make your parenting journey less stressful, more forgiving, and more awesome. Please join us every Wednesday for new episodes of Parenting of the Year.
Parents of the Year
202. Are screens speeding up adolescence and delaying independence?
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
A jar of peanut butter almost ends a marriage… and somehow becomes the perfect opener for a conversation about what’s happening to adolescence right now.
In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline unpack what ADHD expert Dr. Russell Barkley calls “early arrival, late departure”: kids hitting adult ideas sooner (thanks, screens) while independence shows up later (thanks, anxiety, money, and over-helping). They talk milestones that are fading (driving, first jobs, even babysitting), why “checklist parenting” can quietly shrink confidence, and what it looks like to raise teens who can handle inconvenience, criticism, and disappointment without melting down.
You’ll leave with practical ways to step back without checking out: handing over real-life tasks (appointments, banking, transit), modelling purposeful phone use, and trying Stephen Covey’s “Green and Clean” method to build responsibility at home—without turning your house into a nag-fest.
Keywords: parenting teens, adolescence, Gen Z, Gen Alpha, screen time, executive function, independence, ADHD, Russell Barkley, life skills, overparenting, helicopter parenting, snowplow parenting, “curling” parenting, rites of passage, resilience.
Homework activities for adults (to support kids/teens) + resources
Homework 1: The “Say it out loud” phone habit (7 days)
Every time you pick up your phone near your kids, narrate your purpose in one sentence:
“I’m checking the weather.” “I’m texting Grandma back.” “I’m doing Duolingo.”
Kids copy what they think we’re doing—this makes your use visible and intentional.
Resource: create a note on your phone titled “Why I’m on my phone” with 6–8 common reasons so it’s easy to stick with.
Homework 2: Hand over one real-world task this week
Pick one:
- book a dentist/doctor appointment
- call the bank about a card issue
- plan a transit route to the mall/friend’s house
- order their own replacement item online (with a budget)
Your job: be nearby, don’t do the talking, don’t grab the phone “to speed it up.”
Resource: a simple script card in Notes:
- “Hi, my name is ___.”
- “I need to ___.”
- “My availability is ___.”
- “Can you repeat that?”
- “Thanks, have a good day.”
Homework 3: Build frustration tolerance on purpose (tiny reps)
Once this week, don’t rescue a minor inconvenience:
- let them re-pack the forgotten item
- let them email the teacher about a missed deadline
- let them solve the “wrong bus / wrong stop” problem with you on standby
Aim for small stakes. The win is practice, not perfection.
Resource: family phrase to repeat: “Try three ways, then ask.”
Homework 4: “Green and Clean” at home (one job, one standard)
Give one household job with a clear finish line.
No step-by-step coaching. Let them decide how to do it.
Resource: Stephen Covey “Green and Clean” — search YouTube: “Green and Clean Stephen Covey”.
Homework 5: Create a rite of passage (low drama, high meaning)
Pick a milestone you can bring back:
- solo transit to a familiar place
- managing a monthly budget line (phon
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