Parents of the Year

What Do You Do When Your Kid Is the Problem?

Caroline & Andrew Episode 210

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0:00 | 26:47

When another parent pulls you aside and says your kid is the problem… what do you actually do?

In this episode, Andrew and Caroline get real about one of the hardest parenting moments: facing the possibility that your child is the one causing harm. From playground conflicts to teen behaviour that crosses a line, they unpack why so many parents jump to defensiveness and what it costs our kids when we do.

Through honest stories including Caroline’s own “my kid would never…” moment, they walk through how to stay grounded, gather the full story, and respond in a way that actually helps your child grow.

You will hear practical ways to
 Respond without escalating conflict between parents
 Talk to your child without shutting them down
 Separate defending your child from excusing behaviour
 Reinforce values like accountability, empathy, and self awareness
 Support kids who struggle with impulse control or social cues

This episode is for parents who want to raise kids others trust, respect, and want to be around and who are willing to look inward to get there.


Homework Activities for Parents


The Full Story First Conversation

Ask “Anything I should know about today?”
 Let them talk without interrupting
 No correcting, no lecturing

Goal is to get their version before reacting
 Resource notes app to track patterns over time


Values Check In

Ask
 “What kind of person do you want to be at school?”
 “What matters more here being right or keeping the relationship?”

Goal is to build internal decision making
 Resource simple list of family values at home


Pre Event Reset

Quick check in before school or social situations
 “What did we talk about yesterday?”
 “What would a good day look like?”

Goal is to interrupt repeat behaviour
 Resource reminder notes or phone prompts


Pattern Break for Impulsive Kids

Add structure or supervision in problem situations
 Reduce unstructured time temporarily

Goal is to prevent behaviour before it starts
 Resource coordination with teachers or caregivers


Separate Behaviour from Identity

Say “I am on your side. We still need to fix this.”

Goal is to maintain trust while addressing behaviour



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