All Tricks, No Treats #32 What Are We?

Ding Dong! Ever found yourself chuckling in the midst of a podcasting blunder or while nursing an out-of-the-blue injury? Briana and I sure have, and we're dishing out heaps of stories that'll have you nodding along. From our quirky studio antics to the unexpected 'lightning crotch' jolts of pregnancy, we're raising a glass to the triumphs and trials of life behind the mic and beyond. And because we can't help ourselves, we even throw in a tale of thrifting joy because, let's face it, who doesn't love a good bargain hunt story?

Then there's this thing about relationships – when to define them, how to label them, and the sometimes awkward dance around "making it official." Briana and I don't just share our own 11-year odyssey; we also peel back the layers on your stories, including those surprise girlfriend announcements and the gut punch of commitment rejections. If you're bumbling about how to bring up 'the talk,' we've got some tried-and-true tips that'll help you slide into that conversation smoother than a cold beer on a summer's day.

Wrapping it up, we put on our life coach visors (because hats are so last year) and get real about the personal groundwork you need before jumping into the dating fray. Oh, and because we can't ignore the siren call of festival season, we're spilling our thoughts on the latest Coachella lineup so snug up with your favorite drink, and let's navigate this rollercoaster of personal anecdotes, relationship wisdom, and pop culture musings. Cheers to an episode that's like your favorite playlist – a little bit of everything, all rolled into one.

0:26 Podcasting Challenges and Personal Stories
9:59 Making Relationships Official
23:52 Tips for Having the Relationship Talk
32:13 Coachella Lineup and Relationship Expectations

Leave a question or secret you've been meaning to get off your chest so we could play it LIVE (anonymously), and we will give you advice, talk about it, and laugh together. Anything from relationship stuff, sex stuff, kids' stuff, and even single stuff! ↓↓↓

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Cris Garza & Briana Tanori
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Transcript

Speaker 2: 0:26

Welcome back to All Tricks, no Treats. Listen, man doing this podcasting is a little hard.

Speaker 1: 0:34

Yeah, it is. It's not all you think, it is.

Speaker 2: 0:37

Even setting up, since our studio isn't done in the garage. Not even started Setting up, breaking down, editing all this stuff is Research chilling the beers? Chilling the beers. Yeah, it's a lot of work and I just want to thank you, Brianna, for pushing me to want to record every week, Because it's you that's always like are we recording? Are we recording? And I'm like uh yeah. But anyway, if it's your first time tuning in, we're a podcast that talks about family, kids dating Relationships yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:16

And we kind of Been there done that.

Speaker 2: 1:18

We'd like to make it fun while getting intoxicated, so thanks for joining us. For the 100 people who download our podcast every week. Pretty stoked.

Speaker 1: 1:30

Yeah, I would love to know who these people are.

Speaker 2: 1:32

Yeah, for sure I would too. I don't even know 100 people. I don't either.

Speaker 1: 1:37

That's crazy Anyway yeah, yay, well, thank you for you know, you're the one that always does the set up and the editing and stuff.

Speaker 2: 1:46

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:47

So thank you, and I just thought about this when you did your toast we do a little toast before we start and you just talked about, like, how you like doing it and I've thought about how much I love doing with you because I like to just talk to you. Yeah, I like that time.

Speaker 2: 2:03

Remember, we woke up at three in the morning and we just lay there and talk to each other. Talked for an hour, yeah, and then we woke up and we're like what just happened.

Speaker 1: 2:12

I just like talking to you, so this is fun, yeah, for sure. Okay, so how was your week been?

Speaker 2: 2:18

For me it's been pretty shitty because I've had a sore throat for like seven days and I went to the ER thinking they'd give me something and they said you have a cold.

Speaker 1: 2:32

I said you fuck.

Speaker 2: 2:34

I told the doctor I'm like dude. I wish it was worse news.

Speaker 1: 2:36

When a man has a cold.

Speaker 2: 2:38

But my throat, that's like the worst part. I don't know why sore throat sucks so bad. But yeah, it's been okay, I guess. But just been sick, still Still sick. But just, you know, two months, two months, going on three, it doesn't, doesn't matter, I guess. Well, I got you that throat coat. Yeah, it was funny, because when he takes me that and you came home I thought it was throat goat. I literally thought it and I was like I'm the throat go and then that's not really like the cool thing to say.

Speaker 1: 3:10

Well, to clarify, it was T and I got him T for his sore throat and it's literally called throat coat, coat.

Speaker 2: 3:18

You're the throat go. We can't get it twisted.

Speaker 1: 3:22

I almost went by. But that's a sheep, it's a goat, that's a goat.

Speaker 2: 3:27

Does it?

Speaker 1: 3:28

A goat does.

Speaker 2: 3:30

They go Not by anyway, yeah. What about you?

Speaker 1: 3:37

I threw my back out for the first time ever this week.

Speaker 2: 3:41

I'm on like maybe 34 back throwouts, but it is not fun. How did it happen?

Speaker 1: 3:49

I don't know.

Speaker 2: 3:51

She knows. I don't know, but we woke up one morning and I turned over on her side and I ran Okay, family.

Speaker 1: 3:59

That's more. We threw your back out.

Speaker 2: 4:03

I threw my neck.

Speaker 1: 4:07

My back, I'm in.

Speaker 2: 4:12

I wish you finished it.

Speaker 1: 4:13

Yeah, it wasn't fun. I was like oh, my back feels kind of sore, like oh, it feels a little weird, like a little sore. The day after that I couldn't even walk. I was like hunched over, like trying to do things. And when I went to go pick up champ, I was like uh, uh, uh.

Speaker 2: 4:32

Yeah, having a doughnut back is the worst, especially your lower back.

Speaker 1: 4:35

Yeah, and that's what it was oh man. Yeah.

Speaker 2: 4:39

And we're pushing 40. So it's not fun.

Speaker 1: 4:41

Yeah, I really felt it this time.

Speaker 2: 4:43

That's crazy. It sucks having your back doughnut for the first time Because it's like I know what I'm used to and you felt it for the first time. I hate those sharp pains. No, they're the that make you double over, like, oh, what's going on? Like lightning I'm coming.

Speaker 1: 4:59

Oh, that is not what I was going to relate it to, but I was going to say when you're pregnant, sometimes you get this thing it's called lightning crotch Holy shit, I don't know about that. No, yeah, it's in like your groin area, like where your legs meet, your genital area. Oh shit, it's getting weird. And you get genital and you you'll literally just be walking when you're pregnant or doing anything, and usually when you're further into your pregnancy and all of a sudden you'll just get a jolt in your crotch.

Speaker 2: 5:33

Damn.

Speaker 1: 5:34

That'll make you like double over, like that Like, oh okay, what's happening?

Speaker 2: 5:37

Did it feel good a little bit.

Speaker 1: 5:39

No, it's not, it's called lightning crotch.

Speaker 2: 5:42

I don't know it's not called like massage crotch Damn. That's interesting. You never told me that. Now I know.

Speaker 1: 5:49

Now you're educated on lightning crotch. Now when?

Speaker 2: 5:51

I see a pregnant woman. I'm going to be like lightning crotch.

Speaker 1: 5:55

I got it too. I got it too.

Speaker 2: 5:57

They're going to say help, help me. It's weirdo.

Speaker 1: 6:01

Did you hear the thunder for the lightning? Okay, well, let's, let's, before we go any further.

Speaker 2: 6:12

Cheers to lightning crotch and being sick for three months straight Cheers.

Speaker 1: 6:23

Cheers.

Speaker 2: 6:29

Throat is coated with butters ooh crispy.

Speaker 1: 6:36

One more thing we did this week was we got a little time to ourselves.

Speaker 2: 6:41

We did.

Speaker 1: 6:42

So um, we went, did a little thrifting and estate sale shopping.

Speaker 2: 6:48

Yeah, we did. We hit two estate sales and two yeah, two, there's source. Yeah, one was closed, the third one was, but on a Saturday.

Speaker 2: 6:59

Yeah, which is weird, and I'm like I get really pumped up because I see these videos online of people thrifting and reselling on eBay. So I bought like I don't know a couple hundred bucks worth of clothes. Yeah, you bought a good amount of shirts and it listed them all. Today and before. I was there for like three and a half hours and before I left, I got an order and it was something I had in my closet it wasn't even the closest.

Speaker 1: 7:24

I bought.

Speaker 2: 7:25

So hopefully I get a couple more orders. I just do that for fun, it's cool doing that. But, um, we were at a estate sale in New York, Belinda, and, for those who don't know, we're from Whittier, California, and we grew up going to this donut shop called Mothers Made Donuts. And in New York, Belinda, out of all places they had a Mothers Made Donuts shirt and I've never seen one ever in my entire life. I've been going there since I was four years old probably that's what I said.

Speaker 1: 7:52

Did you even know they sold them?

Speaker 2: 7:54

No, and she found it in a closet that I already looked in and I was like I'm buying it. I'll probably never wear it, but it's crazy. It was in your Belinda, at a dead person's house, that we bought. But shout out to Mothers Made Donuts If you haven't been there.

Speaker 1: 8:11

Oh man, they're delicious, the best breakfast sandwiches. And they include little yellow chilies with their sandwiches.

Speaker 2: 8:16

Oh yes, the mouth of the warring their pastrami is to die, for I like the one with the hot dog. The hot dog sandwich, uh huh, oh my gosh.

Speaker 1: 8:26

Actually that reminds me my best friend. She texted me a while ago. She said she was joking with one of her friends about World War III and if we were drafted and what it would take for us to commit treason, what would be the one thing to make you? I pictured it as the homemade booby trap with the box with the stick under it. What would be in there to make you give up? So, she said, if the enemy offers her an air conditioner room with a couch and juzzy shore on, she said for one of my friends, coors Light, my other friend, a bean burrito Extra cheese.

Speaker 2: 9:11

I feel like you know who these are for, yeah, cheese.

Speaker 1: 9:16

And then for me she put I thought of them luring you with an LA hot dog.

Speaker 2: 9:22

That's a good one.

Speaker 1: 9:23

So I wanted to ask you what would be your one thing that you would be Lord with.

Speaker 2: 9:29

Damn, that's a good question, Mm-hmm, I think maybe If they somehow got the recipe for Hawaiian Ellen barbecue and then had a had a nice cigar for dessert, I'd be like oh, so you want like a three course meal Take care of me. Yeah, fucking take care of me. That's all the secrets. I Don't know. Maybe a cigar and some whiskey.

Speaker 1: 9:53

I thought I thought yours would be in a lot there.

Speaker 2: 9:56

Oh yeah, that too damn. That's good. We actually just pulled over for one after we ate.

Speaker 1: 10:02

After oh, we did after. We thrifted, we got some ramen and Maybe like two, three minutes later after we drove away from the ramen place, we heard beep, beep. It was an a lot that man. We had to, we had to pull up.

Speaker 2: 10:17

That was an interesting yeah meet me.

Speaker 1: 10:19

Yeah, I still like the road owner. Oh, what's that Fucking? How does it sound?

Speaker 2: 10:24

Clowner done, done, done. What's done, done, done, not done, done, like no done, done. Okay, it's not that anyway.

Speaker 1: 10:39

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 10:41

I thought a lot in there too. Yeah, that sounds good.

Speaker 1: 10:43

Nice, cool. So our topic for today what are we? I don't know. Oh, it's all about making it official quote-unquote official.

Speaker 2: 10:55

Oh, like quote-unquote, because there's people sometimes who are Are weird about making it like official. There's people who don't want to make it official and just say like, oh, I don't like labels like it, so you're together, but they don't like labels but You're not together, you know. That's why I say quote-unquote.

Speaker 1: 11:16

Do you think that's so? They can do other things 100%.

Speaker 2: 11:20

That's why I didn't want not not like I'm a player or anything, but that's why I was scared to get together.

Speaker 1: 11:26

I just said do you think that's so they can do anything? And you said that's why. Wow, we just celebrated oh, we are doing this topic because we just celebrated 11 years of being together. Okay, I don't mean it like.

Speaker 2: 11:42

I was just scared of commitment to me. There's a couple others, a couple of things that People would do to say they're afraid of making it official. That was mine, yeah, but there are people, obviously, who don't want to make it official because it's technically not cheating If you don't put a label on it. That's why people want to hook up with other people. Okay, Ariana.

Speaker 1: 12:08

Oh, my goodness so we did some polls and Our first one was how long until you had the talk to make it quote-unquote official? 17% said days, 75% said months and 8% said I'm still not sure if we're official with a little melting face. I feel sorry for those. Next one is who asked to, and it was 50 50.

Speaker 1: 12:36

Damn 50% said they asked me, of course, with the little lady going With her hand up. And then the other 50% said I asked I know how to get what I want with the guy going. And then we asked how did the combo go? What did you say? We would love to hear your stories. And a few people answered mm-hmm. About a month my man just introduced me as his girlfriend and didn't even ask. Eight years in with the crying, laughing face, holy shit, I Feel like that probably happens more than we realize. That's a ballsy move, I feel like. That's like you just get very comfortable with each other. You've already like kind of fall into the relationship mode and then that's it, mm-hmm. Next one is I said hey, we've been fucking for months now. It's good, so let's just make it official. Smiling face shit.

Speaker 2: 13:33

Yeah, you know when you get intimate that they're the one you know sometimes hit or miss with people.

Speaker 1: 13:39

But they knew, I guess, yeah next one is he asked after a month of talking and I said no and he stopped taking me seriously.

Speaker 2: 13:46

That's how it ended. Yeah, why would you?

Speaker 1: 13:49

I mean, a month is kind of early, but a month can kind of be early, but like if someone says no, why do you just that? Sucks.

Speaker 2: 13:56

Because you're fucking heartbroken and you think you're at a certain point, but obviously you're not after a month.

Speaker 1: 14:03

What if it's like you didn't even know each other? A month of knowing each other Okay.

Speaker 2: 14:07

I know this is different times, but I have a buddy whose parents got married like within a month of Meeting each other, and, and, and he only knew English, she only knew Spanish. They couldn't even fucking communicate and they got married.

Speaker 1: 14:25

How did that happen? Cuz it's love, I don't know. You can't fucking explain it. Did they just communicate via eye contact?

Speaker 2: 14:31

via P in VG. I just remembered that. But so this whole topic is funny because there are people Mostly like back in the day right, that they would get married quick, pretty quick, but nowadays it's hard to kind of find some money. I think that's just my opinion, but I mean. So a month, I mean, if you feel it, you feel it. I guess she didn't.

Speaker 1: 15:00

She didn't, but he just let it go. It sucks. This is what it is. Last one when do we go to the topic on how to talk to girls? They scare me. Dude girls are fucking should we make that a?

Speaker 2: 15:15

topic. I think it's just the times man. Why is it just girls?

Speaker 1: 15:21

How are girls?

Speaker 2: 15:22

are fucking out of control, please hard to find a fucking way Always say this if we didn't work out, like if we broke up for some reason, no problem probably finding a guy. Asap within a month. Like that girl, Me I'm doomed. It's me and I'm. Before she leaves the house and moves out, or I move out, I'm taking some of her socks.

Speaker 1: 15:52

If you can find them, because I can't.

Speaker 2: 15:54

It's over. For me it's over, but it's hard. I mean for both, I guess.

Speaker 1: 16:00

Yeah, it's super hard to date nowadays and I don't know what I would do with myself but, oh yeah, I have friends that are single and I've even said as well, like from things I've heard, I would not survive. I just go into a cave and Mash your brain all day, come a hermit.

Speaker 2: 16:21

Just eat a bunch of LA dogs. I would too. I'd go back with you and we'd work it out.

Speaker 1: 16:29

We just run each other in the cave.

Speaker 2: 16:30

We'd feed each other. We're eating LA dogs and go huh. Is that it? I guess, oh, I guess.

Speaker 1: 16:40

Okay, I was kind of inspired by the show the Bear, because there's a scene where he's talking to another chef and he says it's clear, my girlfriend, what do you have to ask? You have to ask to see. And then the other guy replies to me he's like are you my girlfriend? That's fucked. He's just basically saying, like you really have to ask someone to be your girlfriend these days, so what do you consider making it official?

Speaker 2: 17:09

When the two parties involved, one of them asked the other and they say, yes, yes, like a mini marriage.

Speaker 1: 17:16

It's very formal.

Speaker 2: 17:18

Yeah, I think you have to be clear. I would never introduce you as my girlfriend if I've never asked you to be my girlfriend. I think that's strange.

Speaker 1: 17:29

Okay, do you want to talk about when we became official? So for the longest time, when we started hanging out in November 11 years ago, and then for the longest time. You would even tell me I'm too scared, I'm scared, I'm scared to have a girlfriend.

Speaker 2: 17:52

I'm a man. You know the men listening know how it is. It started getting pretty serious around November.

Speaker 1: 18:03

That's my birthday, Just you know. We celebrated my birthday, you know, we didn't, you know.

Speaker 2: 18:09

Oh, my God, okay, that's another anniversary. And yeah. I am Damn, we dated a long time.

Speaker 1: 18:23

I mean three months. Yeah, I know.

Speaker 2: 18:24

Three months isn't that long, that's perfect. I think I asked her in January, january 23rd, january 23rd, um was just past and she texts me oh, it's our 11th year of like being boyfriend.

Speaker 1: 18:36

No, we were. We were in bed and it turned midnight, I went.

Speaker 2: 18:38

Hey, happy 11 years we don't celebrate it, so that's why I wasn't in trouble that I forgot about it. But we talked for three months and then I asked her I didn't ask you. You did. Why are you making that noise?

Speaker 1: 18:56

Because the whole time you're like I'm scared, I'm scared, I'm scared yeah but I knew I fucking loved you so much so I asked you.

Speaker 2: 19:04

I think I just asked you. I was saying that because I was a young lad and I was 22. I turned 23 in that that April. But getting it. The only reason I was scared is because I knew Brianna was the one. I knew it and I didn't want to. It sounds kind of bad, but I didn't want to you know?

Speaker 2: 19:28

Yeah, you didn't want to settle down, Not that I was going to be a fucking hoe or anything, but I like like being single, you know, and uh, but yeah, that was a better decision for me.

Speaker 1: 19:44

I was scared.

Speaker 2: 19:45

I told her I was scared and then I said, do you want to be my girlfriend?

Speaker 1: 19:48

And she just went and then we were official If you weren't watching, he said. I just smiled and nodded.

Speaker 2: 19:55

I don't think you said yes, you just went, uh-huh.

Speaker 1: 19:59

I was like oh that's it, bro.

Speaker 2: 20:01

I'm signing off, you know.

Speaker 1: 20:04

Oh wow, everything comes to light today, not in a bad way, but you know what I mean.

Speaker 2: 20:11

Anyway, that's how we got. We were laying in her bed and I asked her yeah, Okay, so when do you ask the timeframe? That's a thing you don't know. You know like for some people it's days, for some people it's months, for some people it's years.

Speaker 1: 20:34

So, Jinks. Jinks.

Speaker 2: 20:38

What do you?

Speaker 1: 20:38

got. There's no certain amount of time it should take. It varies by everyone, according to a social worker that I was reading from online. She said you can't have the conversation after the first few dates or even within the first few weeks. After all, it takes time to see if the relationship has what it needs to become something more serious. So there's no official timeframe. You just pretty much have to go off how you've been feeling. So do you want to stop being a hoe or do you not want to stop being a hoe?

Speaker 2: 21:11

I agree with that person. But listen, there's a point where you're ready to settle down and I think that whether it's weeks or days or months, you need to let that person know, because if they're not in like the same mindset or the same feeling as you, you just like that guy who, when she said no, he left, kind of you need to not like waste your time. So there are some people who want to wait, but there are some people who are not willing to wait and you need to bring it up, I think. So there isn't a set time, you know, but there are people who have such a strong connection where it's obvious that it's going to be brought up?

Speaker 2: 21:59

Yeah, it's going to happen, but other people who. It's not so obvious and it takes like longer amount of time. If you think you're ready, you need to bring it up in that conversation, but that's my opinion, I guess.

Speaker 1: 22:14

What about, like you said, that guy who he asked and she wasn't ready? But what if she becomes ready, like after a certain amount of time, like he becomes emotionally unavailable, that's the thing like you don't know how that's the right, how much time they need.

Speaker 2: 22:34

So I don't think he should have cut her off, like right then, and there he should have been like Okay, he's gonna be sad, dude. He's gonna be super sad if he asked a girl and they say no, who wouldn't be. But he needs to make you know, like, listen, like, uh, I see future with you and this is where I'm at. So, um, she needs to let him know, not a time frame, but like what are her thoughts? Like what is she thinking? What does she see from this? So you're not wasting each other's time, especially if they're our age. We're old as fuck now. So you can't be like I'm not ready and I'm fucking 40 years old. You know, I don't think so you need a. If you know, if you don't think that they're the one, then you shouldn't just Like try to keep it going. I guess you should Move on for his and her sake.

Speaker 1: 23:24

Okay yeah okay, um, so I have a question about uh, this is what I didn't tell you. Seeing other people before making it official, should you tell them what?

Speaker 2: 23:35

do you mean?

Speaker 1: 23:36

Like, before you make it official with a certain person, should you tell them that you're seeing other people or that you're hanging out with other people? You're talking to other people. Do you think they deserve to know? Holy fuck, that's a curveball. Okay, well, I'll. I'll go first.

Speaker 2: 23:51

Yeah, while you, while you think.

Speaker 1: 23:52

I think that you should kind of not like you need to sit them down and have a talk about it, but you should kind of like hint at it, bring it up a little bit, because you know, when you're hanging out with someone, maybe being physical, making things a little bit more complicated, you should kind of keep, uh, in consideration their feelings.

Speaker 2: 24:20

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1: 24:21

I think feelings is different from being exclusive, like you don't want to just be, like, oh, we're exclusive. Yeah and then Because if they get hit with that, that that kind of sucks.

Speaker 2: 24:31

Yeah. So I think if that conversation hasn't already come up, why are you even fucking Asking someone to be official, like I would if I was dating someone or multiple people, I wouldn't ask a person to be my girlfriend, you know, because I'm seeing other people. I think that conversation would have already taken place. You don't ask someone to be your girlfriend or boyfriend if you're Hooking up with other people, right?

Speaker 1: 25:01

No, yeah, no, I mean. What I mean is like before you make it official, like before it becomes official if you're. Like hanging out, because I feel like when you're on your way to making it official, you're already being Like you're spending a lot of time with them. Yeah so that's what I see like you shouldn't be doing that, maybe.

Speaker 2: 25:20

I think you should be exclusive before you ask someone to be your boyfriend or girlfriend. Like not seeing other people. Yeah, it should just be you guys.

Speaker 1: 25:29

Okay, yeah, okay. So here are some tips on how to have the talk.

Speaker 2: 25:34

Oh no.

Speaker 1: 25:37

Okay, one set the right ambiance. Okay, the setting can make or break the conversation, whether it's your favorite restaurant like um, your favorite fried chicken place like the alcove, when I set the ambiance and I told someone. I liked it and she was like Okay and I was like oh shit.

Speaker 2: 25:57

This is why wait.

Speaker 1: 25:58

Was that you trying to become exclusive?

Speaker 2: 26:02

Yes, oh, and she broke my heart.

Speaker 1: 26:06

I'm sorry, uh. So I have. Whether it's your favorite restaurant or just at home, make sure it's a place where you both feel at ease, because you know also if you get denied, you don't want to be At knots very far on a ride, drink a whole bottle of vodka and saw bay root you know oh no, and uh drove home, uh blacked out. Oh wait, is that what you bet? Is that what you blocked out? Were you drinking your feelings?

Speaker 2: 26:35

That's not why, but it helped. It helps suppress some uh suicidal thoughts.

Speaker 1: 26:43

Oh no.

Speaker 2: 26:46

I'm just kidding. It helped like Not be sad. Oh all right, it's still not sorry.

Speaker 1: 26:54

So the next one is have some honesty with a side of tact. So it's essential to be genuine about your feelings. Um mentioned specific instances that make you think about the relationships direction. But also read the room. It's like, uh, presenting a gift. It's not just what's about inside, but it's also about how you wrap it, how it's coming.

Speaker 2: 27:18

Yeah, I think you shouldn't make it weird. Try to make it the least weird as possible, because it is kind of like a Dating sucks. You know like you never know a hundred percent If someone's ready to like really settle down, unless you feel that connection, you know. So If it doesn't work out like, try your best not to make it like weird. I don't know how to explain it really, but yeah, you brought your bottle of vodka.

Speaker 1: 27:47

Yeah, you know what to do for sure. Okay, next one is open-ended questions. Are your friends? Um, so they're a great way to foster a meaningful conversation, instead of pushing for something you just kind of ask which is like what are we? Are you exclusive? What are we doing, like? Leave the room, leave the floor open For a conversation you know, because you don't want to be the one to be like hey, I want you to be my girlfriend and this is why. This is why, and then it's just silence and crickets.

Speaker 1: 28:20

Because, you've already laid it all out there.

Speaker 2: 28:23

Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1: 28:24

Okay, um. Next one is share your vision. Talk about where you see your relationship going. Um, not in a we must plan everything way, but a casual chat about like what you kind of feel like is going on. What you'd like to see? Um, yeah, not, you know.

Speaker 2: 28:45

Be honest yeah, open Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1: 28:48

Yeah, okay. The next one is Make it about the two of you, and I feel like this one is very important because it's not just about you and your feelings. You need to pause and listen to what they have to say as well.

Speaker 2: 29:02

Yeah, I agree, getting together with someone is a huge life step. Um, that's pretty serious because it it's not just you anymore you have to think about, uh, your partner now and everything you do pretty much.

Speaker 1: 29:18

It takes two, baby yeah. Last one is acknowledge their feelings. If they need time to think or have some reservations, be understanding. Remember. It's something um about the both of you and every step, even the little ones where they're a little bit hesitant. They're essential to your little story together.

Speaker 2: 29:41

Yeah, yeah, for sure, that's it Cool. Those are some good tips to keep in mind. Yeah, good luck, but there's some fucking crazy people who won't listen to those tips you can't just like fucking make it weird. Don't think of the other person's feelings.

Speaker 1: 29:58

I know I want this.

Speaker 2: 30:00

I want you, I just want to be with you, and earlier. I love you, holy shit, the L word. Oh, I love that show, but uh, yeah, that's funny. I mean, obviously there are things that everybody knows what to do, right, but implementing them and moving your relationship forward or talking to the significant other is is hard, I think.

Speaker 1: 30:23

Yeah, that's a big conversation to have.

Speaker 2: 30:25

It's rough. You get a lot of fucking butterflies and you're like holy shit, what's happening? I hope they feel the same way, but yeah.

Speaker 1: 30:37

I feel like you're constantly going back to the alcove right now.

Speaker 2: 30:42

Fuck that person. I already told you I would love to say what happens to people after I date them, but it's not very nice.

Speaker 1: 30:50

And we're working on that for 2024.

Speaker 2: 30:53

We're working on positive vibes to everyone.

Speaker 1: 30:59

I love you. We wish you nothing but light and happiness. Okay, yeah. Next is our ask me, wow, okay. So our question for today is what is holding you back from asking out the woman you like?

Speaker 2: 31:21

Jesus.

Speaker 1: 31:22

I didn't even think of that Really. Yeah, I just picked the next one, okay. So someone said we work together and I like my job.

Speaker 2: 31:31

Yeah, that could fuck up a whole job for sure. Yeah, that's hard.

Speaker 1: 31:35

But what if you have like the best, like the best connection ever? Would you leave your job?

Speaker 2: 31:42

Leave. Why would I leave?

Speaker 1: 31:44

So you could ask someone out.

Speaker 2: 31:45

No, just ask them out, what if?

Speaker 1: 31:47

you worked at like Burger King. Just ask them out who cares? Because what if things go bad? You know.

Speaker 2: 31:54

It trips me out when people like each other at work and then they're like we need to tell management and sign a fucking policy. You know that stupid? I don't even forgot what it's called, you know, but why keep it under wraps, you dumb fucks? Stop being weird and keep flipping burgers.

Speaker 1: 32:11

Oh, okay, yeah. Next one is her lack of existence.

Speaker 2: 32:16

She doesn't exist. She doesn't exist. Sucks for you.

Speaker 1: 32:20

Well, I did ask a woman out and her exact response was you know, I don't think I have ever fully recovered from that.

Speaker 2: 32:26

Jesus, yeah, if you can catch that she doesn't like you or into you, then you need to fucking figure it out.

Speaker 1: 32:35

Currently unemployed. Don't have the courage to ask anyone out.

Speaker 2: 32:38

Yeah, yeah, I feel like in every situation in life, you're never going to be 100% ready. I don't believe that. But if you don't have a job or if you don't have your shit together a little bit at least, then how the fuck are you going to take care of another person or being like a healthy relationship especially if you're a man, because I think men have to take care of women not like 100% you get me right Like men should be able to provide, you know. But if you don't have a job or a fucking car or something you know, like you need to fucking do something if you're older.

Speaker 1: 33:21

Yeah, all of a sudden it comes if you're older, okay.

Speaker 2: 33:24

Tell them. Well, if you're older because when we started dating I didn't have anything how do you have a place to live? I was thinking in her house every night, every night, baby. That's why you saved me man. But we were young, we're stupid, we're 22 years old, but now I'm speaking now like if you're 35 years old, dude, you better have something. I just text my buddy because this girl who was dating I don't know it didn't work out and for some reason she came up on my TikTok and I hit him up.

Speaker 1: 34:04

The girl who was dating yeah, you met her at a baseball game.

Speaker 2: 34:09

She's like in her 30s. I'm not trying to hate on like school, but it's like you're in your mid 30s and you're saying like I'm at college and I don't have time for friends or making like stupid, fucking TikToks. And you're like 40 years old, going to college, like I'm glad he didn't fucking date this girl because this guy's everything you ever wanted. You know like there are people who need to fucking figure it out. You know you can't use the college excuse for your whole life. That's just one example. I don't know. But if you're like 35 years old, in your 30s, you need to fucking have something figured out. If not, then I don't know, man, you need to fucking run a lap.

Speaker 1: 34:53

I get that. I don't even know you have to do something.

Speaker 2: 34:58

Come over so I could be mean to you and fucking tell you to fucking do something.

Speaker 1: 35:02

You could swim some laps in our pool. You'll just pull your head up. He'll be yelling at you and I won't turn the heater on either. You're going to that cold ass fucking. You're getting that cold plunge.

Speaker 2: 35:10

Our daughter just fell in. She could fucking go in there, you could go in there. She was crying, but whatever, these people pissed me off. Fucking lazy ass motherfuckers I want to be in a relationship. God, you can't even wipe your own ass. All right, sorry, I'm getting a little hot. You heated?

Speaker 1: 35:39

We have two more. The fact she's my wife. If I asked her to be my girlfriend I think she'd get mad. That one's cute. Oh, Last one I did. She broke things off with me a week ago.

Speaker 2: 35:54

What? How long were they dating? Any more context on that one?

Speaker 1: 35:57

That's it. That's all they have. So he asked her out and she broke up with him a week. We don't even know it could have been like five years, two months.

Speaker 2: 36:06

Okay, going back to the one before that, asking your wife to become your girlfriend. Yeah, there are still some times I text you to marry me, because I used to tell you that, like a long time ago, before we were even married, obviously that would just tell you to marry me.

Speaker 1: 36:23

And then you'd say like, let's go.

Speaker 2: 36:24

Yeah, that's my answer every single time, but I feel like the same thing, like I always tell you to marry me because I can't get enough of you.

Speaker 1: 36:32

Aw, cute that saying of you being a hoe. Cute, use a hoe you throw a coat. Okay, and that's it for our spin. Nice, I like that one. Yeah, lastly, is our ha-goss-ling. You're cheating.

Speaker 2: 36:52

Please.

Speaker 1: 36:55

Okay, so Coachella was announced.

Speaker 2: 37:00

The lineup is shit, I think.

Speaker 1: 37:01

Oh well, they announced, and the ticket sales are the lowest they've ever been in a decade. Who's trying to see Doja Cat? Ugh, ugh.

Speaker 2: 37:11

I don't like her. I saw Tyler the Creator in 2012 at Coachella. Sorry, I'm not saying that to brag, I'm just saying that to like. Are they like? Are they recycling people?

Speaker 1: 37:24

They're like rotating.

Speaker 2: 37:26

Not in a bad way. I mean, I like some of the stuff, you know, but and that's when everyone dressed like fucking Easter baskets. It's like because they dressed weird. You know, those fucking, all those, fucking, all those Tyler the Creator guys, all those Earl sweatshirt they used to wear like the supreme hats with like floral button ups and like purple shorts.

Speaker 1: 37:46

No, that's like golf attire.

Speaker 2: 37:48

Yeah, like they're fucking weird and I would always be like dude, what are these guys, all the kids that were there? I'm like dude, this is insane. Like these people look fucking stupid. I mean, I love Tyler the Creator, but you know what I mean. Like it was cool Back then.

Speaker 1: 38:05

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 38:06

I mean, I think it could be. Listen, he's the one that I'm like. Damn, I'd see him. You know who's the one him and Lana Del Rey, oh okay, I'd be like them too.

Speaker 1: 38:14

But doji cat, like who else is is deaf tones, lana Del Rey deaf tones and. But I'm a little offended. I mean I'm a huge deaf tones fan, but I think they're like the third or fourth line down, I don't know what line really.

Speaker 2: 38:28

Yes, I think that's a bigger stage, oh.

Speaker 1: 38:31

I'm so offended. No doubt is going to be there.

Speaker 2: 38:35

Yeah, no doubt is going to be there.

Speaker 1: 38:36

That's, you know, deaf tones. For me, deaf tones, and no doubt, are the best ones, and I'd see deaf tones.

Speaker 2: 38:43

No doubt Tyler, the Creator, for sure. I'm just saying you know, we know what you're saying who else is good. I try to look up people, but I didn't see any cool people oh wait, I think I have the lineup.

Speaker 1: 38:53

Hold on Well let me just say this In 2015, it sold out in 40 minutes. How long ago was it announced? Maybe like two weeks ago? It's still on sale now. Jesus, it would sell out quick. Yeah, it's sold. Well, that's why I said in 2015. It sold out in however many minutes 40 minutes 40? Hold on.

Speaker 2: 39:15

Listen. I hope David's not listening, but I have been wanting to take him to Coachella Fest and he's been wanting to go since, like for since 2010. So I don't know. Maybe I'll get a day pass or two. Why is no doubt down there?

Speaker 1: 39:36

Well it says, and no doubt, I think, because there's such a huge band like they're just using.

Speaker 2: 39:42

I wish they had. I wish they were where doji cat is.

Speaker 1: 39:46

Oh yeah, no yeah. So there's Lana Del Rey, Pesso Pluma, Lil Uziper.

Speaker 2: 39:51

Oh shit, I love this. That's my homie.

Speaker 1: 39:54

So I sorry, deftones is the second line, but I feel like they should be a headliner. So everything always title of the creator blur I spice. Oh, sublime, oh, that's good. Dom Dalla, bleachers Grimes, john Grimes, good Grimes. I think I've heard a few of Grimes things. This is how we show our age we're old.

Speaker 2: 40:17

I think she's good Maybe.

Speaker 1: 40:19

Oh didn't? That's the one that dated Shia. Right, don't not accuse the one that came with all the accusations about him.

Speaker 2: 40:28

Never mind Grimes no.

Speaker 1: 40:30

You grimy, grimes, grimy baby. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 2: 40:34

No no.

Speaker 1: 40:37

No, okay, doja cat, doja caught J Balvin Jenny.

Speaker 2: 40:44

We know I don't care about those.

Speaker 1: 40:46

We don't know what these people are in our 30. A lot of them are DJs, I think Lil Yachty, oh shit, dj, snake, dj.

Speaker 2: 40:55

Snake.

Speaker 1: 40:55

Yeah, yeah, that's it. I just opened up another link. Oh man, yeah, so that's it.

Speaker 2: 41:02

Harsh.

Speaker 1: 41:03

Who's the?

Speaker 2: 41:04

fucking booking agent on that thing.

Speaker 1: 41:06

Well, I was reading a lot of comments from people and a lot of people were saying, like well, first of all, it's the economy. A lot of people were saying that, like, buying eggs is hard enough. I'm not going to pay for a three day pass.

Speaker 2: 41:21

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 41:22

Thank your boy, joe Bina. Okay, and then a lot of people are also saying, like a lot of the artists who are touring, who are on there, are already touring, they just finished a tour, they're on tour right now. Like it's easier to just see who you want to see. Yeah, you know, instead of paying for all this?

Speaker 2: 41:42

Yeah, to see them.

Speaker 1: 41:43

Yeah, so that makes sense. Good luck, coachella.

Speaker 2: 41:47

I feel like the lineup hasn't been good for a few years, yeah, since 2015.

Speaker 1: 41:53

For sure, well, good luck.

Speaker 2: 41:56

Yeah, okay, is that it?

Speaker 1: 41:58

Well, the last one is our hot gosses. We got a response to our hot goss of last week.

Speaker 2: 42:05

Ariana Grande.

Speaker 1: 42:06

Uh-huh. And it says Ariana Grande in all caps Isn't the one who ruined a marriage. By the way, the SpongeBob guy is the one who ruined it. He was the married one. He was the one who made vows. Her new song is gross. She has no decorum. But the only people who can ruin a marriage are the ones who are married. But I love you. I'll stop yelling. I agree, that's what I told you last week, too, ariana Grande herself was married. She was married herself.

Speaker 2: 42:35

I don't know.

Speaker 1: 42:36

So not only did she, ruin that marriage because they went on a double date together. And how cringy is that to go on a double date with someone and then end up with them.

Speaker 2: 42:48

That is pretty weird, but she was married herself. Yeah, that's weird, uh-huh, no, but I think, okay, I don't know what I think, okay, we got a response to that because we posted it.

Speaker 1: 43:03

We got a response to the response. Uh-huh, we got response squared, okay, and they said nah, ariana Suss, I agree with that too, I agree with that too.

Speaker 2: 43:14

Both of them are the SpongeBob reference. He kind of looks like Mrs Potts Is that her name?

Speaker 1: 43:20

Who's Mrs Potts?

Speaker 2: 43:22

The driving instructor Is that not her name.

Speaker 1: 43:25

No, the flounder looking lady. What's?

Speaker 2: 43:29

your name Driving instructor.

Speaker 1: 43:32

How do I look that up? Driving instructor. Instructor. Uh, mrs Puff, mrs Potts, is it Mrs Potts, mrs Potts, is it Mrs Potts from?

Speaker 2: 43:47

fucking Beauty and the Beast. I have no idea where I don't know, mrs Puff he looks like Mrs Puff kind of.

Speaker 1: 43:56

No, Mrs Puff looks kind he does not.

Speaker 2: 43:59

Yeah, like that looks funky, Devious, damn. I mean she's in a funky. Looking guys. Oh, she is what's his name. He's pretty funny though, but uh, I don't care about him.

Speaker 1: 44:14

I don't agree with that.

Speaker 2: 44:17

Anyway, good, hot goss. Thanks for responding to the response.

Speaker 1: 44:20

Yeah, we like that, we honestly, even if we don't agree, we welcome any sort of response so we can talk about it.

Speaker 2: 44:27

I love, particularly when people hate, because I love responding.

Speaker 1: 44:33

You love a good debate.

Speaker 2: 44:34

To their response. But anyway, that's it right yeah? That's it Cool, so hopefully the next episode or the one after that we could do skeletons in the closet and Brianna will tell you their number real quick. So our phone number is 562-4570613. Perfect you could call a text. It'll go straight to voicemail. You could leave a voicemail and we'll read it during our show and we'll laugh.

Speaker 2: 45:04

And have a good time, you know. Tell a secret, whatever. Talk shit about anybody Us, your kids. But yeah, Thanks for tuning in. You know we're gonna keep this going and we'll catch you on the flip-flop later. Bye.