Solo Dad Talk: Parenting Struggles, Marriage Teamwork & Spiritual Leadership (with Nala) | WUD

In this episode of the What’s Up Dad Podcast, Grayson goes solo again — with Nala the goldendoodle as co-host — and gets real about the season of dad life: coaching, busy schedules, parenting struggles, marriage teamwork, and what it looks like to lead your home spiritually. 

We talk about the hard parts (discipline, losing your cool, apologizing to your kids, and learning as you go), the values you want to pass down, identity outside of being a dad, and how faith shapes the way you parent. Plus, we hit a snack review (Lay’s Brazilian-Style Garlic Sauce chips) and finish with rapid-fire fun. 

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Disclaimer: This episode is for entertainment and general discussion, not professional advice.

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💬 Question for you: What’s one parenting lesson you’re learning in this season?

Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Pet Care Challenges
03:04 Dad Life: Coaching and Parenting Responsibilities
05:57 Real Talk: Parenting Struggles and Lessons Learned
08:45 Navigating Different Parenting Styles
11:49 Marriage and Family Dynamics
15:09 Spiritual Leadership in Parenting
17:47 Identity and Growth as a Father
21:10 Legacy and Values in Parenting
23:59 Rapid Fire Questions and Fun Insights 

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Transcript

Grayson Thompson (00:19)
What's up everybody? It is the What's Up Dad podcast. Here we are. I am back at it with my trusty co-host of the night. This is Nala. ⁓ Changed up the lighting a little bit, set the mood because we are going to dive into some more beef livers by Vital Essentials here together and she may or may not be packing a food review. So we're going to do that together. What do you think Nala? You in like Flynn? I'm in.

Hey, while we're opening this up, this is a What's Up Dad podcast. How do you guys handle dogs that have ear infections often? I am really struggling with that. We're struggling with that because every time you go to the doctor, it is wildly expensive. And yeah, that is a fun part of being a pet owner. And she gets ear infections. And so I feel bad for her. Doesn't whimper or anything, but you know, she'll just start itching and it's like a problem that she has and we just feel terrible.

You know, but it's like pretty expensive. So I don't know. Dad problem of the day. Mostly curious about that nonetheless. So let me see if I can keep her interested. Let me set the beef liver to the side so she can stay interested on those. You guys missed it. Last episode that I did with her, we get to the end of the episode and well.

Gee.

lay down in the chair and she was like, I'm good. I'm locked in. And I'm like, you could have waited. I mean, you could have done this early on, right? And she didn't and it's okay. But we're here tonight. We're making it happen. ⁓ You know, and gonna have all kinds of good stuff. We got questions from Beth. got a co-host is super busy this week. They have some new things they're doing with their offices ⁓ and he is just heavily involved. So.

I am here making this recording happen and we're going to fly through some questions. I asked producer Beth to send me some questions she wanted me to answer. I haven't looked at them. They're sitting on my phone right here. I'm using ⁓ Ryan's mic stand as a phone holder, as you can see, propped up. That's it. And we're going to get to it. Yeah, a lot of good stuff though happening with the podcast. Super excited about it. And we're going to rock and roll and hopefully do some rapid fire questions, jump into these things.

I 100 % know that she chat GPT'd these questions. ⁓ yeah, there's that. Ryan thought of his and I chat GPT'd mine and my wife chat GPT'd hers because that's how we do things. So let me get this cord out.

Is that out of way now? Okay. All right, perfect. First thing, we're to start some light and funny dad questions. She even gave me titles. That's how I know she chatted, she BT'd it. So it says, what's the most dad thing you've done this week? Oh, coach softball. So been out coaching softball, had that twice this week. That's pretty dad-ish, I would say. So just been a coach. And I'm the head coach of our team.

⁓ It's U10, nothing crazy. So please pump the brakes on like this is a big job of sorts. It's U10. So these girls are just learning and that's it. I would say that is one of the things that kind of locks the most dad thing I've done this week. ⁓ With best crazy schedule, I'd also say too, like I've been extra dad lately, which I find really weird. it's not...

I have my, our responsibilities are equally yoked in the sense of we're both parents and we're both active and we both do everything. Um, that was saying she might do a little more than mine, but I have no problem picking up that and vice versa. She picks up when I'm needing help and she can do my stuff too. um, but at the end of the day, uh, been more dad recently because of our, uh, strenuous schedules that we've had and things that we have going on, but that's okay.

⁓ cause we're here now and we're making it happen and I get a chance to coach and have all that kinds of fun. when did you realize you become officially become what? When did you realize you officially became your dad? ⁓ my goodness. Chat, you're failing me right now. ⁓ like my dad, would say maybe as I took on a coaching role, I think that's changed things in, ⁓ in aspects of like my life and stuff that I've done.

⁓ similar versions of just being involved in coaching. So that's pretty common. ⁓ What's something your kids think you're good at, but you're definitely not? Ooh. man, that's loaded. I feel like I'm pretty decent. I'm like a jack of all trades, master of none kind of scenario in a certain sense. ⁓

I think my kids just give me credit for a lot of things, even though not just not very good at like, I'm not like excellent at any one thing. So I don't know if there's any one particular item that we could call out on that, but ⁓ man, wish, man, I did not look at these questions. I probably should have, cause I could have a little bit more loaded. But again, I feel like I'm pretty much a jack of all trades. I do.

There's things that I really excel at, but I'm very good at a lot of things. So like I don't miss the boat on a lot of things. That's not me pumping my own, tootin' my own horn, but that's just the reality. ⁓

What's a rule you swore you'd never have as a parent, but now you do? I didn't understand no sleepovers as a parent. I didn't understand that. I didn't understand just like constantly being like you, there's a party for kids and you want to be there. ⁓ Like why there's like helicopter parents and stuff like that. I'm definitely a helicopter parent. Like if my kids are somewhere, I'm probably there with them.

We don't leave them anywhere. We don't allow sleepovers. We don't allow them to swim in pools without us being there. So that's one of the things that I would say in general. ⁓ I feel like ⁓ being a helicopter parent more so. And I don't say like that usually has negative connotation, but I feel like ⁓ I didn't want to act as one. Now don't like hover. We don't hover over them, but I think just being more readily available at all times to them is something I wasn't sure.

that I would do. I figured I'd like let them grow up because that's how I grew up. I grew up, I would say very quickly and now Grant and I guess talking a little bit older, but I felt like we had a lot more freedoms and we could have done stuff. mean, but that was back in the day too, when you'd leave on your bikes early in the morning and you'd come back eventually maybe to eat lunch or you'd find lunch somewhere or whatever it might be. And then you came home for dinner, luckily, maybe possibly.

You know, you might stay over a friend's house. Like we don't do that. Like I, but I also, my oldest or daughters, so it's a lot different for them. ⁓ that probably question would be better geared towards Beth in my opinion. ⁓ I'm supposed to be giving you these. ⁓ Probably geared towards Beth just because I, for the girls, I'm sure I'm going to feel differently with my son though. I'm absolutely going to feel differently with him. But again, haven't hit that period yet where I feel like, ⁓

I've had to parent him differently. He's just like a super young kid at this point in time. All right, we're in real talk parenting. Here we go. We need some beefaloo boo. you got two that time. What's been the hardest phase of fatherhood so far? Oof. ⁓ I mean, I think there's a huge difficulty with the infant's stage.

That's very difficult. There's also like just because like staying on schedule, being strict with schedule and stuff like that's what we did. ⁓ Less sleep, you know, those things. Travel is a lot different. You know, we don't travel a lot anyways, but I think those were difficult. But the phases like there's just some in between phases that are really tough. Actually, probably what I would consider the most tough in a certain sense is like the calm before the storm of like a gross spurt for a kid. Those are crazy because they're all out of whack.

Right? They're all out of whack emotionally, physically. They're just goofy looking. They're just like, there's all kinds of things going on and you don't know. And then all of sudden you're like, ⁓ you're like growing a little bit. Like you've hit like a you've you're changing. Right? I can see it's like the before the change is occurring. I would say that is a very difficult phase to handle, especially with older girls.

I would say that is a huge factor because I have no idea what I'm doing with girls. ⁓ And so not understanding that next phase of where they're at. And then two, the girls are so different than my son and various things. So like to me, that is a huge thing. And then like me, I'm just like, this is really bad. And then all of sudden like the phase happens and you're just like, ⁓ wow, this is the bad stuff. So I would say that is a factor that is ⁓ hard, right?

That phase is the calm before the storm of changes that these kids have. I say that is extremely, extremely hard. What's something no one warned you about being a dad? Honestly, my son and himself, he is full of it. Boys are different. They're a riot. And that is crazy. I was not sure.

I'm not prepared. We wanted a son, we shot for a third and boom, we got a boy. Congratulations. Wow. He is a handful, but he's also like my little best friend too. And I say that lightly, like not best friend as in like that, but best friend is like, are like, he loves me, right? Like it's super cool and we enjoy each other, right? So that's kind of cool as well. So I would say that is...

something that I was not sure like that that yeah that's definitely something that's for sure ⁓

Yeah, and some of these, I got a bunch of questions. So I'm flying through, kind of given like some very, ⁓ very high level stuff here. I'm kind of flying through some of this stuff. So bear with me and I'm reading it as I go and chat GPT doesn't put the thoughts together all the way undoubtedly. So ⁓ hardest thing, a warned about having a son. I wish I was warned about that and how different they are than girls. I didn't get it. Now I do. ⁓ When do you feel like you're getting it right?

I had a tough day today as a parent. know, and I don't think men and husbands of men or women and parents like are willing to admit that I had a tough day. The kids were extraordinarily bad together. I mean, my daughters were just at each other's throats.

and got kind of physical with one another, which is not like them, but there was like circumstances that arose and they become kind of physical with one another. I mean, nothing like you would think. They didn't hit each other, just like, just it was, you know, one of those situations where they were just like, you know, they wanted to like shake each other kind of thing. It was just weird, right? They were at each other's throats. My son, I think he tried to, I was on a call. He tried to choke me with my seatbelt. I have no idea what he was doing.

I don't know, I need to be like Liam Neeson there and like getting out of the seatbelt kind of scenario. Like, thought I'm getting kidnapped by my own children. Like, all of this happened in a matter of like a 10, 12 minute period in a car ride where we stopped and I took a phone call. And man, I didn't, I don't feel like I was a good parent. I felt like my response to it was very poor and everything. And so...

I would say I don't feel like I handle that all the time well because I can jump off the deep end, but offering some different perspective ⁓ to that, you know, they continue to be bad. And I just feel like there's not a one size fits all in parenting model of like, okay, you can be, you know, Master Chief or you can be Mr. Nice guy or you can be this. I think

where I get the most is just having open communication with them of what's going on. And so to wrap up the story, I went upstairs afterwards and I, ⁓ my middle child, she went to bed. I put my son to bed, middle child. ⁓ she had to go to bed and my oldest was finishing some homework. My middle fell asleep upstairs pretty immediately. And so when I got there, I woke her up by accident. Didn't mean to. And first of all, told her,

I said, do you know how much I love you? And her response was, even after the tough day, was, I bet I know more than the moon and back. And she sticks out her arms. And to me, and this is going to make me tear up, even through the thick and thin of the scenario, to her understand that is so powerful. you ⁓ you want one of these? OK.

You know, we're going to have hard days. I said, and I apologize, but like I also apologize to my kids too, like for saying things I shouldn't say and how I say them and what I'm saying without them understanding, because they're only kids, right? They're just little. And sometimes things are, you know, they're doing that they don't realize that they're doing, but they're doing, and then they're making bad decisions based off that. So it's very like frustrating for them. And as parents, we just pop off because...

Like they did something bad or stupid, you know, and that's not fair all the time, right? So we have to just be careful. And today it was like an all the time, not fair scenario that it just felt like it was like the cyclical cycle that occurred. And so my response was poor as well during that. And through that poor response, you know, I guess, ⁓ you know, I, I still wanted to come back to them to let them know like how much they mean to me and that I, I myself need grace.

for my actions and I hope that they can forgive me for my actions. Does that wipe away what they've done and what they did? No, they need to learn from those mistakes as we all will and I'm going to learn from how I reacted and acted in a situation. at the end of the day, need to... I do want... I apologize and I want them to understand it and hopefully accept my apology and give me grace and understanding in the same way that I will. And then in the same token of...

not going to bed angry with your spouse or wife, my goal and my attempt is not to go to bed angry with my kids and know that tomorrow is a new day and that I'm praying for them and loving them no matter what and grace is passed to them through us ⁓ and in the situations that we deal with and that tomorrow we hope to be better. We plan to be better. We want to be better. And dad might fail tomorrow as well too. And that is a realistic side of things. I may fail tomorrow and

do the same thing, but I can only hope that my kids are willing to let me attempt and try, right? Just like I'm willing to let them attempt and try to be better and to learn as little human beings. So that's that. How do you handle discipline without losing your cool? Sometimes I lose it, but I also think sometimes it takes that not losing it in a way of being bad, but losing it and just like being like sometimes they need to understand their severity behind the things that they've done.

and what they're doing and however you manage that as one and ⁓ otherwise, but also speaking to them with kind tongue and ⁓ perspective as well. There's not a day that goes by that I don't feel guilty for how I've said things, but I will say that ⁓ I've always spoken to them with clarity and understanding and apologetic.

And I think they do understand that dad knows that he is a work in progress and I'm a center just like they are. And I can only do the best to do better and I hope they can accept that. So we'll move on, we'll move on. That's a tough one. If you have thoughts on that, I'd love to hear it. I'd love to have feedback on that perspective ⁓ because...

It's just something that, you know, it's tough. I think it's tough for everybody. So, marriage and family balance, okay? Dogs are not the answer, first and foremost. So sorry, Nala. It says, how has becoming a dad changed your marriage? ⁓ it's made it better. ⁓

Why? Because I want my kids to see that I love my wife first and foremost, other than God. Like God and then my wife comes next and my spouse. ⁓ And so it's given me the opportunity to show and ⁓ manage that love in that way. ⁓ So that's changed my marriage in that way. Like I have a challenge, my challenge is to build these kids up to one day they will find love in the way that my wife and I love each other and our relationship is. So ⁓ that's changed our marriage. ⁓

We're in a season. Everybody has a season. We're not selfish. don't, ⁓ you know, we don't, ⁓ we, our kids are involved in everything that we do. We don't just, you know, we'll have date nights and we'll have time to ourselves and stuff, but we, our kids are our life, not the other way around. Our life is our kids life. It's our kids are our life and we work through that. And I want them to see that because that's important for us, ⁓ with it. So, what's one thing you and your spouse do?

as a do well as a team. ⁓ We survive, right? I don't know how to say this. Like we survive. I think our kids see us ⁓ working together, right? I think, and I know that's like as a team, like our kids do see us working together. They see us working together in our lives. They see us working together in our communication. They see that we're not perfect, that we are not perfect human beings ⁓ at all, but they see us loving on each other. They see all the qualities that

need to be seen. And sometimes it's good, bad and ugly too. They see the frustrations and the fights and stuff like that. We don't hide from them. ⁓ I they might not see it all, but we don't hide from them. ⁓ that's on purpose, right? Because the world is not perfect. We sin all the time. We are sinners, right? Like we are broken people. And my kids need to understand that they are broken people. And one day they're going to have a relationship that's going to be just like ours. And it should be taken as seriously as ours is taken. And so they see us

constantly working together to be better. That's just a big thing. And we do that as a team. ⁓ where do you still struggle balancing work, marriage, and kids? All of it. The balance act of all of that is real. The balance act of work is is daunting to all of those, I think, just because it's demanding in the stuff that we do.

⁓ I will say at the end of the day, being a business owner is not for the faint of heart, it's not for the big families in our kind of business that we own. So it does impact us and stuff like that. ⁓ But it's one of those things that I do bring to the table of like, we have worked and we're at a stage of life now where ⁓ I'm somewhat trying to slow down the work for the kids and then also involving the kids with it. And I can only encourage you in any capacity

⁓ to try to attempt to make that happen. Like that is the ultimate goal is to be able to live living that life that I want to live with the kids and the experience with the kids is just what I'm looking to do. And so ⁓ the balance of the work will fix those things because I have a beautiful marriage and I have beautiful kids and we spend time with those kids and we spend time in our marriage. So it's like it's both those things are actively

happening and they're sharpening all the time. But the marriage, I mean, sorry, the working piece is what is the hills and valleys, right? The highs and lows is because that can get in between those things. And I just hope my kids can see through like, A, the amount of work that we have to do, but we also take off time and we also like are very involved and we do all the school functions and we do everything that we possibly can. There's not something I drive them to school and pick them up every single day, right?

That's huge. It's a big thing that happens. Like that is it. That is it right there. So that's important. And, and, you know, not many families get a chance to say that, especially dads, for example. ⁓ and not that my wife doesn't want to, ⁓ but I love it. I thoroughly enjoy it. Whether they drive me back, you know, what crazy on the way to school or on the way home, there is opportunity and I'm never, I'm, I,

could easily just lose those 30 minutes ⁓ or hour a day, I could lose that. But I've gained an hour a day with my children by spending time in the car rides with them and to and from school. I learned I'm the last person they speak to other than their mom, right? I'm the last person they speak to and speaking the Lord into them and that relationship and the importance of that. And I'm the first person that...

they speak to when they leave or one of the first people, right? And so ⁓ we have the opportunities to set the stage and to clear the stage for the remainder of the day and the next part of the day. And I take that very serious. So ⁓ as we get in the next, what is a, what something dads don't talk about enough in marriage? ⁓ That's tough, right? I don't think we talk about our feelings enough. ⁓ We all hide behind

all of our pain and we wear the bare the weight of the world. And I think we can talk a big long podcast over this just in general. ⁓ But we, we just don't talk enough in general about meaningful things. We're very self-centered. We're very, ⁓ very, I mean, you you call it chauvinistic. We're very, a lot of things, right? And, but what we're not is vulnerable.

And I think we need to talk about being more vulnerable. And I'm not sure how much I want to get into that tonight, but being vulnerable is very important. Being vulnerable is what allows you to break through things with your spouse and with your family and with the Lord, right? Being vulnerable with the Lord. If you're able to be vulnerable with the Lord, why can you not be vulnerable with your spouse or your children? That's my question, right? And so we should be able to be vulnerable with the things that we're dealing with.

Yes ma'am, can I help you? Is it time? Well let me see what else we got. We got identity and growth. yeah, we got time. Let's do it. Okay, alright.

So, okay, all right. We got a food review here. We've done beef liver on the last episode. I don't know if you guys have seen this. This is Lay's. Lay's is a great company, maybe, if you believe in that. This is their Brazilian-style garlic sauce made with real potatoes, no artificial flavors, no colors from artificial sources, flavored with other natural flavors. I don't believe any of that nonsense, but check that out. It's a green-looking bag.

She is smelling it like it's going out of style. This is creamy, zesty, garlicky, crispy, crunch. Yeah.

Okay, let's do this. Get a whiff. What do think? What do you smell? What do you smell? Is it smell good? Are you in? You'd like your lips to be in? Yep. Are you in? What are we thinking? You're back for another sniff? All right, sniff test. I'm not sure what makes it Brazilian. So I just don't know that. I don't know if it's because it's the FIFA World Cup stuff, but I don't know what makes it Brazilian. So it's just something I'm throwing out there. No clue.

Not sure, very confusing. ⁓ So yeah, we're going to pop into this. ⁓ I also think this is extremely... ⁓ How do I put this? I think it's extremely misleading. There is a big lemon on the side of this. I did not see that. There's no lemon in here. I read the ingredients. There's zero lemon in here. But yeah, there's a lemon. And I think that's really funny because... ⁓

because when you're looking at a product, that's what you think, so you think that's there. Know what that is, is like the flavor profile. So that's what people are getting. It's kind of like drinking a drink. What do you get? Do you get Dr. Pepper's, what, 27 flavors or whatever it is? ⁓ And the answer should be yes or no. I don't know, but there are those. So let's go ahead and get a test of this. I'm going to set these on the table for you. Do not eat these. Do you understand me? Do not eat these.

You don't don't do it. This is a no yet. This is not a yes. You, okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

You're loud chewer. Are they crispy? No? Okay. There you go.

Please don't make as much of a mess as my co-host. All right. ⁓

I don't know what Brazilian style is, but I'm gonna give this like a 9.3 out of 10. I love garlic. Every looking of the flavor on here is here. It's zesty. I don't understand that. So I'm digging it. I'm digging it. 9.3. 9.3, this is really good. I like chips. I'm a big chip guy. So yeah.

All one more girl.

All right, moving on.

Identity and growth. Who are you outside of being a dad? Man, that's like a weird question. Thanks, Beth. That's a weird one. Who are you outside? I hope, honestly, I hope when I die, I hope people say I'm a man of God first, that I'm a man of a God that was a husband, a father, grandfather, great grandfather, whatever that might be, a friend and all that other stuff. That's who I want to be, a friend as well.

somebody that you can talk to ⁓ and have that. I have deep relationships and that's a huge thing for me. Not surface level stuff. I am in need of deep relationships. ⁓ I feel like I didn't have those as a kid and growing up. And also with having a brother that's gone and stuff like that, losing that factor, that person that you automatically have that connection with potentially as family, there's that deep relationship that's just gone, right?

I attempt to have deep relationships and that is being a man of God and a husband, father, all that stuff in combined allows for that. So that's what I hope for that. What is something fatherhood has taught you about yourself? I make a lot of poor decisions, ⁓ being a father was not one of them. ⁓ I've learned that I'm selfish and I try to not be selfish every single day.

And that's weird. It's just a weird thought or perspective to have and try to put the kids first in so many ways and my wife first and stuff like that. and I think that's just being open, right? I think that's just being open and honest. And if you wouldn't say that, like, please tell me that you get up in the morning and before you go to the bathroom that you are making sure that the kids are getting up and getting ready and you're last to go to like.

You know what mean? I mean, some days it's like that, but like the reality of it is we're selfish people, right? We're going to make our own coffee first and stuff like that. And, and, and, and, and all those things. But I just encourage you to look at that. see, she's getting comfortable. ⁓ I encourage you to look at that differently. And, that's what it's taught me. Right. And I've learned that. And so I strive every day to be less and less selfish and more selfless, ⁓ for my kids and for my family, my, my, my wife specifically, right. To be more selfless.

⁓ specifically. So that's what I plan and I pray for and I look for that, but that's what it's also taught me. I feel, you know, and that's crazy to say that, but ⁓ that's what it is. I don't know. Those are things that I've thought about. So what kind of man are you trying to raise your kids to be? I want them to be children of God. I threw and threw, if I can do one thing, investing in them in all ways possible is to be

Children of God. I want that so bad at the end of the day what it has a lot allowed and what it has brought me is the ability to Continue on right? It has made my relationship with my wife stronger the more and closer I get to God the better my relationships get with My wife my kids my friends that deepens those opportunities. So just something I I would say ⁓

That's what I want them to be first and foremost. Outside of that, I'm going to win. I won the lottery already by having them. And at the end of the day, like if I can just have them, which they are like loving the Lord through and through, if I can continue on that path with them and raise them to be that. ⁓ Yeah, there's that. What habits are you trying to break from your own upbringing? Wow. We could probably have a whole episode on that. ⁓

I'm using the skip button right here.

Yeah, we'll come back on that. I know you guys are going to be upset, but we're 30 minutes into this and I got more to ask. So, ⁓ yeah, we're going to skip on that one because I think that's another like habits of your own upbringing. You know, I think there's a lot of things I've spoke about already to that, but I want to skip that one. What legacy do you want to leave your kids? Again, I know this is a broken record, but the broken record is the most important record I have of just like being God fearing individuals.

If that is not instilled to them, I don't care. I could leave an immense amount of money and wealth and fame and fortune and all that stuff. And we work hard to be able to provide to our kids and I'm going to continue to do that. But like all that can be left for them and it wouldn't matter if they don't know the Lord. Right. And I want them, I want the legacy to be built around that, around that relationship with Christ through and through every day, twice on Sunday, three times on Monday.

You know, and so on and so forth. Like, I want that to be important. So like, leaving that legacy of that perspective and that importance to them is what it is. Everything else will come in droves. I do believe it. I believe in God's plan, whatever he has for us. Well, I'm skipping to the next stuff here. Faith, values, ⁓ and such. ⁓

How has fatherhood impacted your faith? It's tested me to learn about and learn from the Bible and see the Bible in a different way. Not my own worldly way though. So just want to like preface that. Like I think as you read the Bible, you read it in the way the scripture is meant to be said to you at that given point in time, but it doesn't remove the real context of the scripture, right? It just may speak to you in a way that makes sense in your given time of life.

but it doesn't necessarily remove the context of what was happening. So we have to understand what we are reading. And as we are looking through that, it's important to know what we are going through and what's happening, right? And the applicableness to the stories and everything. But it's impacted my faith. Like it's made, it has made me, I understand the importance of my kids being closer to the Lord. And so I am truly 100 % invested in that.

All to the point, which I think there's a question here, how do you lead spiritually in your home or try to? I do love notes to my kids every single day and not to skip to that. But one of the ways that I'm impacted and working with the Lord is every day I have my phone out and every morning and I don't do it 99.9 % of the time it happens in the morning in front of the kids. I am writing their love note, which is a scripture verse that's a scripture of the day.

to them and I hand write it no matter how long it is. I don't shorten it, I don't paraphrase it and I talk to them about it. It went from just notes that I provided to them to love notes. I feel love notes is my love showing them like Christ in a broken down way, not a broken way, he was not broken, but like it shows it in a broken down way and it gives us an opportunity to speak about it. It grew from just writing the notes and stick them in the lunchbox and.

I mean, all the way from when Skyler was in pre-K, like as early as it could be, know, and Sydney didn't even get lunches. And, you know, I'm writing these things, I'm coming to find out years and years and years later, like they kept every one of them, every single one of them, have boxes of these notes, little sticky notes. And I go through hundreds of sticky notes. I got three kids, right? I mean, every day I write three notes and it doesn't sound like a lot, but every day we will wait, we will be late for that note to be.

in their lunchbox and it's always in their lunchbox, right? And I pass that to them and lead them spiritually through that. That's one of the things that gives me a talking point and opportunity of God being in their life every day, regardless of what's going on, regardless of what's happening at school, regardless of where they're at in their lunch or what's happened before lunchtime. When they're in their lunchbox, they're going to see that and they're going to see the love that mom and dad have for them through that note in whatever capacity and whatever that note brings to them that day. So that's important. ⁓

you know, for me for that aspect. And I think, you know, making sure that we understand that. then beyond that, there's a question on here that says, what values are most important for you to pass down to your, ⁓ for your kids? ⁓ I just want them to have all the fruits of the spirit, right? To be filled with the fruit of the spirit and so many, you know, love, joy, patience, kindness, you know, and all that. Like everything through and through, and I just miss some, right? But...

That's my terrible mind and lack of knowledge and confidence in it, but I try to be better in that. But I want them to have all those things and be filled with the Holy Spirit in so many ways. so knowing and loving and understand the Bible, and I don't want to use this as a quote unquote scapegoat, but them having a working relationship with the Lord is going to provide the values that are most important. That's it.

I want them to have a working relationship with the Lord and that is gonna pass them the values that they need to have. So for me to pinpoint a specific value of just being a good person is, I feel like a cop out because a good person is not a value. A good person is a worldly view of something, but what the Bible says about being good is different, right? That's what I want them to know. I want them to know the difference, understand the difference and live that difference with regards to things.

⁓ Leading spiritually in your home. I mean, again, I talked about the love notes. We love worship music. I actually create music. I create worship music and I do that with the kids and I explain to them the importance of worship and worship being the Lord. And so that's one thing that I've done. I'm involved in worship music minimally at church, right? Nothing big, nothing crazy, but I want them to see that. I'm invested in that. They know that I'm involved in small group and

They see those things and they've been in and out of these small groups and these things in our household for years and years and years. And we continue to have that. And that is to me, that is where it is at right. ⁓ And through and through. So they are able to see that in our home. And those are just some of the ways that we happen that happens there. Outside of that, I've taught them, in my opinion, and right, wrong, or indifferent. And I think my wife would agree and is on the same page. I've taught them like how to pray too and how to like how to pray like

with devotion, right, and be devoted to praying. And I think that's important. ⁓ Leading with thankfulness to the Lord and looking at all the miracles that he does on a daily basis from just allowing our feet to hit the floor in the morning and the air to fill our lungs and so much all the way to the end of the day, right? All those things are miracles that the Lord is providing us that we cannot go without witnessing and respecting that. So,

I've taught the kids like how to find that because there are going to be times where it's going to be hard and it's going to feel like the devil is just winning over and over and over and over and over again. But you know what? The devil, the devil could have stopped me from waking up this morning. The devil could have done this. Like God is alive and well and kicking and moving and his grace is flowing. And I want them to know that and continuing to be rooted in the small things, the small things that lead to the big things is what's going to be changing in their life over and over again. And one day when dad's not

next to them and they don't know and they're not looking at it and they're struggling they're able to latch on to that. Last question on here it literally is no ⁓ what's a moment where you saw God show up in your parenting? I think at every at every point in time we've had to meet our kids somewhere right I think it's it's improper for us to require them to meet us as much as it is for us to meet

them. And so ⁓ that's where God will show you when you need to meet them. And I talked about earlier about God will show us when we need to meet them. It's been a tough day as a parent, right? Just in general. And I felt like I was failing and stuff like that. And God, I felt God's hand on my life and my heart on things that I needed to do to meet our children where they needed me today, right, wrong or indifferent and whatever was happening.

And so at the end of the day, to me, I think God continues to move us. We just have to be open and willing for God to show up, ⁓ willing to see him show up in our lives and understand where he's at and how he's working through us. So I don't know, that's something I feel like it's very constant in those things. And God is really showing me how to parent ⁓ in that. So, all right, rapid fire segment.

Fun for the listeners. This is where it ends here. I can't, not sure. she knew. she knew. I'll put them close to the edge for you. See if you can, there you go, sweetheart. Look at that, she's like a bum, like laying down and eating these. That's hilarious.

All right. Coffee or energy drinks? I did spill water. Coffee or energy drinks? Both. I love caffeine. Like a solid 400 ish milligrams of caffeine a day is a really good number for me. Like a standard day. So I love caffeine. I love I have a newfound passion for coffee. I love that. think coffee is great. Hoorah, in my opinion of that. And energy drinks are fantastic. I mean, it wouldn't be nothing for me to consume one a day.

of each right at the end of the day so I love them early mornings or late nights I do both of them unfortunately I don't sleep a lot so I'm up really early and I'm up or I'm up really early and I stay up late at night just because I want to a cheat code is I steal hours from my own time to be less selfish to be able to get workouts in and stuff like that so getting up before the kids get up before the wife gets up is important

but I don't let that stop me from spending time with my wife and dedicating the time that I need to with the kids in the afternoon. So I find that time and getting that out is important. Family vacation. wait, strict dad or fun dad? Yes. I think I'm both, right? I have no problem. I have no problem, you know, encouraging and getting ice cream with the kids and doing the fun stuff and watching videos together and all that stuff. But there are things when I need it done and we want it done, I'm to be the dad that's going to, that's going to shh.

up the whip. We don't have a whip. Like, you know what mean? I'm going to be strict. I'm going to like be, hey, this is what it is and boom and bop and, you know, and be very dedicated in that. So I can be both of those. ⁓ But probably more on the fun side, best probably more of the strict parent, ⁓ which is weird ⁓ in a certain sense. But but I'm the more of the enforcer. Right. So that's where I where I have that. She's strict on like rigorous things that are happening. ⁓

and fund the other, you know what I mean? So it's like we share again because we share roles, we share bits and pieces of that depending on where it needs. Family vacation, beach or mountains. I mean, who come up with these?

I don't know. I just say yes. We don't go to the beach a lot. We haven't been because like quite frankly, I don't feel like my kids are old enough to really understand. can't, like babies and sand just doesn't work with me. Uh, so we really haven't taken the kids to a beach in a long time. Uh, I think that would be fun. We've talked about it and that's something we're planning on doing. We're not close. So that's also like the other thing we're not close to the beach. So to get there is quite a haul. Mountains. I love the mountains. Um, but yet

Having kids, not everything revolves around that. We're not big. Like I like hiking. My wife doesn't like hiking. So yeah, I don't know. Let's just go insert Disney, right? I take Disney. read a thing the other day. The reason we go to Disney so much is because every time they go is a different experience and every time will be different than the last time. And you only have so many of those times. And to me that just hit. There's only so many times you're to have a 10 year old that's going to go there because eventually they'll be 11.

and seeing it from an 11 year old's eyes, which in the same sense is seeing it like a 35 or 36 year old eyes. So insert Disney, I take those over that. One word your kids would use to describe you. I think my daughter, my oldest has said this a bunch that she's called me goofy before. I'm goofy. I enjoy, I want to have fun. So maybe I'm more of the fun dad, right? I want to have fun. I am goofy.

I do a lot of dad jokes. I make a lot of jokes. want people to be kind-hearted, loving-hearted, tender-hearted, fun-hearted, right? So I do a lot of jokes. And so maybe goofy would be a word for that. So guys, that's what I got. That is the What's Up Dad podcast, Nala 2.0 here. We got the Brazilian-style garlic sauce, Lay's potato chips, filled with some beef liver, having all kinds of fun. Answers, ⁓ questions from producer Beth.

Really appreciate you kicking some of these. wish they would have been a little less chat GPT'd. Maybe that's how Ryan feels when I throw him those. Well, it sucked not having him here today, but we wanted to get an episode out for you guys. I just don't want to forget that to keep this train rolling. We really appreciate the sports. Appreciate you guys continuing to listen and watch and be there for it. So if you got any questions or if there anything that we can go over from a topic perspective, let me know.

If there's anything you want to talk about in the parenting or leading your family spiritually or whatever it might be, let us know. And last but not least, if you have a review item you want us to review, definitely send it or tell us because I will get it and I'm going to have fun with it. Guys, really appreciate you. Thanks again and definitely check it out.