(#97) IVF, 44yrs old and a Baby: My Second Pregnancy & Birth Story

In this episode, I’m sharing something incredibly personal—my second pregnancy and birth story. At 44yrs, after going through IVF with our only remaining embryo, I found myself pregnant during the peak of the wet season. From morning sickness and humidity to preparing for another little soul to arrive, this was a very different journey from my first.

This is an honest, raw retelling—from IVF round #2, through pregnancy, and being induced at 39 weeks—to the moment of birth. It’s a positive birth story, where I share my opinion and experience of becoming a mumma to our beautiful baby girl.

In this episode you’ll hear me talk about:
😷 The continuation of our IVF journey and how I narrowly missed covid!
🤰 My pregnancy journey through out the wet season and how this one was different to my first pregnancy
⚤  Our gender reveal
😳 My opinion of the Glucose Tolerance Test
🗣 The conversation leading up to being induced
😫 Going through labour round #2

If you want the full run down on my first pregnancy head on over to Episode #35 Navigating IVF, Pregnancy, Motherhood and Business

I hope you enjoy this episode and I will be back later this year with more mindset tips and techniques, sound baths and meditations and personal stories. ✨

🔴 Please Note:

I’m not a midwife or medical professional—this episode is simply me sharing my experience & opinion based on my experience, and none of it is intended as medical advice. 

If you're on your own conception or pregnancy journey, I completely understand that this episode might be sensitive. Please, take care of yourself. Come back when (and if) you feel ready—or skip it altogether. You know what’s best for you. 💛

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I acknowledge & pay my respects to the Traditional owners, the Yawuru People of the land and waters of Rubibi (Broome) where this Podcast is recorded, and all Aboriginal Elders, past, present & emerging.

Podcast Produced by Livvi Music Media

Transcript

0:00

Hello, hello and welcome back. Welcome to this episode of the Alchemy Mindset Podcast. Wow. It's been literally six weeks since you last heard from me, and by the time this episode comes out, will probably be a little longer. But in the meantime, since the last episode in this one, I've had our baby. And this episode is all about my pregnancy journey and my birth story with Isla. Isla Amari was born on the 21st of March. She's exactly two years and seven months apart from Ava 'cause they were both born on the 21st of their month. And I wanna say a few things before I dive straight in. Firstly, this is a really positive birth story. So if you are in the midst of your own pregnancy journey and you love consuming, know that this is a positive story and there is a positive outcome. And this is one of those stories where. I feel like even though you can go in with a birth plan, you have to accept and understand that things can always go a little bit differently, but this is a positive one. There's no crisis, there's no real drama. There's a beautiful experience, and that's something that I really wanna share largely because it's very different to my first pregnancy and my first birth with Ava. If you did wanna hear about that journey and that story, I'll put that episode in the show notes below because I do talk a lot more from memory about my IVF journey. So, yeah, and so the other thing I want to include here is that I'm not a gynecologist, not a midwife, not a obstetrician, not a nurse, not a doctor. I'm not a health professional in the pregnancy and conception and birthing. Industry. I don't even know if it's an industry. I just say environment. All I'm doing is retelling a story based on my experience and my opinions. So again, if there's something that I'm saying that's a bit triggering or you don't agree with, that's fine, but we're all entitled to our opinion, and this is mine based on my experience and the knowledge that I have. This is about a woman sharing her story from her side of the birthing experience. So if this episode is triggering in any way because you are on a health journey or a pregnancy journey and things are a bit challenging, things have been a bit rough, don't listen to this. Like, don't cloud your mind and your energy with another story or opinion of someone else. Be true to yourself. Take care of yourself. Maybe it might be a moment for you to reflect on your own nervous system. Do you need to do something to help you relax, feel grounded, feel safe and supported? You can just pass and skip over this episode and come back to it at another time when you feel like you do want to listen to it. And lastly, I just wanna say if you're hearing any other background noises as I'm talking, I'm actually doing Islas night feed. I just thought this would be a great time to talk into my phone while feeding, because hey, what else am I gonna do while I sit here? I don't really wanna watch TV right now. And yes, so I do apologize for any other further sounds and background. I'm gonna try and pause or delete them as we go along. Lastly, very lastly here, I am gonna try and tell this story as quickly and concisely as I possibly can. You know, I love to talk, you know, I love to PR on, I'm not like the quickest TED talker. So if it does come out as being quite a long episode, my hot tip for you and in anything that you listen to auditory, where it's, where it's even YouTube, whether it's a podcast, it's an audio book, it's an online lecture. If there's an option to change the playback speed for that particular episode, or whatever it is you're listening to find in your settings where you can change the playback speed, I highly recommend it because. Listing at something at like 1.2 or one and a half times is gold. And I do that for a lot of things that I consume auditory, so therefore I listen to it and then I can always go back and listen to it more. You can even slow it down. So if you're like me and you love to take notes on something that feels really good to remember, then slow it right down so that you can hear it. And you know, you can literally copy things word for word. So let's get into it. If you are the first time listening to me, you've found this episode through a beautiful search, welcome. Welcome to Alchemy Mindset. My name's Anna, if we haven't met before. I'm a mindset coach as well as a Sound Bath healer, and it's my. Belief that I'm here to help you find your purpose, tune into what it is that you're meant to be doing in this lifetime, and I support you through mindset and sound baths. This podcast is all about that. You'll find affirmations, talks, and tips about mindset for your business, as well as beautiful sound baths and meditations for relaxation, resetting and realigning your energy. Let's get into this episode. So as I begin, so background on me is that I live in Broome, which is a remote and regional location of wa and I am also 44 years old, and both my babies have been IVF babies. So that's a little bit of a brief background. Just so that you understand who I am in that respect, I'm gonna wind the clock back to last year when I was like, right, I'm gonna do this next or this last transfer. We only had two embryos basically in our first egg collection, and we only did one egg collection, and that was enough. We had two embryos that were tested as really viable, really strong eggs, and that in my mind, confirmed the two girls that I always saw in my mind. Whenever I did a meditation on my family, I always saw two children, particularly girls. So I was like, there's two embryos. There's perfect. We've got two chances. Two opportunities. And I believe that both will develop into babies successfully. And I knew in my mind I was never gonna go back to another round of IVF or of an egg collection of any sort because it was just way too much. And then also being a mature mom or someone who is an a MA advanced maternal age, I knew I didn't wanna go round and do another round of IVF once was enough, honestly. Anyway, so decided, right, 2024 was it, that was the year that we were gonna do the second embryo, gonna do the second transfer and hope for the second baby. I knew that I couldn't wait another year. I knew that my age was a factor. I knew so many other elements of my life that 2024 was it. So looking at the calendar,'cause with IVF, you get to plan when you wanna do this. I saw an opportunity in May. I started all the testing, started doing all the processes, and unfortunately I didn't get very far. I. In 'cause you have to do some blood tests initially, and I didn't get very far in the whole entire process because it came back that potentially had a cyst and an ultrasound proved that. So they said, we just wanna wait until that clears. So we'll give it like another month or so and then we'll do some tests and see if it has gone or if it's there. We don't think it's anything to worry about, it's just something that happens. But this is what's come up and I decided that, okay, I'll go and do, go consult the naturopath while we are waiting for this to clear up just to see if there's anything that I can do to, you know, move it on, speed up the process, make myself feel a bit more healthy. I don't know, maybe I needed to get my body back into a bit of realignment. I'd only just literally stopped breastfeeding of January that year, so I'd been breastfeeding for 18 months. So no period stopped breastfeeding, which was a walk in the park really with Ava. I was expecting like. Turmoil and tragedy, but it was fine and my period came back straight away. So what I did with the naturopath was a detox to help just cleanse and clear my system and hopefully get things in a little bit more alignment and back on track. And then when I looked at the next available space in my life, it was definitely gonna be July, June was a write off 'cause I had to wait a little while. But also I was busy with work, so it just wasn't gonna happen. July came around, some further testing showed that the cyst had cleared up and everything was looking good and it was like ready to go. And I'm like, all right, let's do this, let's start. And it also was a good timing because it meant it was gonna be the first week or so where it lined up with the school holidays, which was perfect.'cause I thought, well. France was available. Is he gonna come down to Perth with me or is he gonna stay behind here in Broome? And we just decided in the end that he'd be better off staying here in Broome rather than coming with me, which he would've loved to have come to be part of the transfer process. But logistically it was gonna be too much. We'd have to take my mom as well so she could look after Ava. And then we'd probably have to find somewhere else to stay and we wouldn't be able to stay in our normal place, which is with family. And it was just gonna get too much and too expensive. So in the end, I said, you are better off supporting me being here in Broome to look after Ava. And that was the other thing. I didn't wanna leave Ava behind either for that period of time.'cause I think I would've had to have gone down for a few days and I just felt like it would be a bit too much. For my mom and for Ava.'cause we haven't really been away from her ever really in an overnight sense. It's always been, you know, maybe she'd just do, you know, mom would take it for the day. But that was it. So everything was looking lined up. And then school holidays, I think it was the week before the school holiday started, Franwell got covid. And I'm like, brother, crap. Oh no, F-bomb. Holy moly. Is this gonna happen? Because I didn't know if I would get Covid. I haven't had Covid. I don't know if I was gonna get it. And this was like, to me, the most aligned opportunity I felt like every other moment thereafter, things were busy with work, I had things all booked in. It was just not looking right. So I said to Franwell, you're gonna stay in Broome. I rang up the IVF clinic. By the way, I worked with Jana in Perth and they were amazing. I loved their support and the process with them. Highly recommend. Anyway, they said, come anyway. Let's hope that all your testing's all right, but you will need to do a covid test before and after, just to make sure you're clear. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna go down for a week by myself. And everything worked out. Everything was meant to be, because I got there. PCI test, said, no, COVID, get in. And then I had a whole week of just, you know, kind of enjoying a little bit of downtime for myself, knowing that my family was okay in Broome. And on the day that I did the transfer, like everything was working out well. Because the thing is with IVF, yes, you're booked in to do the transfer, you have to do all this like testing beforehand. To make sure that you know, on the right hormone levels to make sure everything else is going okay. The whole process literally stimulates that you are ovulating. So you kind of like hyperstimulated a little bit as well. Like I don't like that feeling of my ovaries being hyperstimulated. And then your body's put in the processes. If it was about to conceive, like in terms of like you'd conceived naturally in a way. So everything is kind of like we're priming. We're priming everything to be in its optimal state so that when you do the transfer, the body goes, oh, this is normal. This is how it's meant to be. And I have to say like leading into that, I felt so bloated. I felt so big. I felt like my stomach had popped already. It was so weird. I just really didn't like it, that whole process. But hey, that's the journey we go on, and I honestly believe as well, so I know that both my girls as spirits needed to experience this whole entire process and be conceived in the IVF way because they needed the optimal bodies and these specific bodies to do the work that they've got to do in this lifetime. If you haven't read or heard of Spirit Babies, read it, listen to it, even if you're not on a pregnancy journey, because it really gives you insight as to how we choose our families, how we choose the bodies, how we choose the experiences that we need to experience in this lifetime based on what our soul journey is. Really interesting. Anyway, on the day. Uh, then yes, that's the other thing in IVF, you have to then wait for the telephone calls to say, yes, everything's looking good. Then I had to book myself in to get down to Perth because I'm in Broome, and that also takes logistics and coordination. Okay, so you're jumping, I feel like lots of hurdles each and every single step of the way and on the day it's not necessarily like, come in for this appointment. It's like, first of all, they wanna say, yes, your testing's right. Do this trigger release on this particular medication at this time. Yes, everything's looking good, blood tests are good, blah, blah, blah. And then they're like, all right, now we have to wait for the embryo to start defrosting and making sure that it's okay because anything could go wrong. This poor embryo Isla had been frozen, which is so weird to think she was already like five days old or something like that with the sperm and the egg and the, what you call the insemination. But it's like she was put on ice for I don't know how many years, I can't even think, since June, 2021. And now she's been defrosted to like, and everything should just continue on, just as it would normally without like the whole controlled environment. So weird to think, right? So anyway, they've gotta ring up and say, yes, the embryo is looking good. You've gotta come in for the set time that you've been asked to come in. I'm like, okay. So I get the green light, get the go ahead. We are going in, thankfully this is not like a procedure where you need to be under anesthetic. It's just done through like an ultrasound type procedure and a catheter and it's, it's like, it's very painless. Anyway, so I went in and I sat in the exact chair in the waiting area as I did with Ava. So I thought that was a beautiful sign. So in that time, I'm just trying to do some relaxation and some breathing and just tuning in to just try and be in the most relaxed state because. I wanna feel really good and relaxed and calm before I go in. And I don't wanna be distracted by other people's thoughts or noises that I can hear around me. So I just had some really beautiful relaxation music on, and as they called me in, my doctor was there and it was literally the exact same, like, oh, what's the word? I'm really losing my words here. I really shouldn't be recording this. So late at night, it was really the same experience as what I had with Ava. So on one monitor they show you the embryo and then it goes down this little tube and then into the catheter, which is put inside you. And then on another video and another monitor, you see the ultrasound of the egg being transferred. And it was literally the same. It was like this little shooting star going in there. They said it was a perfect like landing, if you wanna say, of what I'm gonna call it. And. She was there. So the rest is now up to my body to decide that yes, it's gonna accept this and that it's gonna be in its normal process. So this is where they again, do more, there's more like sort of medication that you gotta take to sort of continue the hormone stimulation and support for your body. So everything is in the balance of who knows what will or will it not work out. It's literally 50 50. Either way, is it going to or is it not? And then you're sent on your way. Good luck. Hopefully we'll get to call you with some positive results and hopefully in nine months time you can call us back and tell us that you got a baby. So I love my time in Perth. It was wintery. I spent a lot of time at my favorite cafe, got home and it was like, in that time, my idea, it was like the start of such a different pregnancy. I felt nauseous so much earlier than what I did with Ava and also the feelings I had in my tummy. At this stage we're far different to what I had with Ava, but I knew everything was okay. So by the time they called to say, congratulations, test results have come back and you're having a baby, I was like, yeah, I know I'm having a baby. I'm fricking nauseous already. Like it's insane. And I have to say that I think for the first few weeks I just sort of survived in that nauseous kind of state. And then as soon as I could start seeing Tracy Gilchrist from Kimberly Maternity. So I chose to see an endorsed midwife throughout my pregnancy journey rather than seeing a doctor and then getting referred to the hospital to be part of their. Midwifery program. I was like, no, I'm gonna see Tracy as soon as I can. As soon as I got in there, I'm like, Tracy, I can't cope. Just gimme the drugs. Like, what have you got that's anti nauseous medication? I need it. So she was able to prescribe me something, and that was such a relief because the nausea this time wasn't something that I could just manage or it could dull down. It just felt really intense the whole time, and it lasted, I think until about 12 weeks, and then it started easing off. But in that time, I already felt so different in my body. I felt like my stomach had popped at eight weeks and I went to pole dancing and I was like horrified. I looked in the mirror and I was like, I look like I'm at least 15 weeks pregnant already. This is ridiculous. And in that I only went to pole dancing twice, and each time I just going upside down. I automatically felt so uncomfortable, so nauseous. Like I was like said to my dance teacher. I was like, I'm not gonna be able to do pole dancing at all. Whereas with Ava, I was pole dancing right up until close to the end of second start of third. I performed on stage at 20 something weeks. I was still doing yoga. I was so active. I was so energized. No, this pregnancy, and of course everybody says, you know, you do have a toddler, you are running around after them. I'm like, yeah, that's true. But I'm just so wiped, like I'm tired, I feel heavy. I feel like my stomach's popped up, you know, quicker than before, which again, they say second time round. Yeah, you show a lot faster than maybe first time round. I felt very bloated. I felt like there was a varicose vein that popped at the back of my leg. I felt like my legs were always heavy and sort of not swollen, but just lethargic and tired and achy. So I wore compression socks. I wore compression pants. I felt like I just wanted an extra pair of hands to hold my belly the whole time. Like I felt super uncomfortable. And also the added factor of that, my pregnancy was leading me into the wet season, which I felt came early this year. Usually it doesn't sort of kick in into like end of October, November. It kicked in as of like the end of August. It was ridiculous. Started September. It was instantly hot. Felt like the humidity arrived faster than before. Oh my goodness. And then being pregnant. Okay, so this is what I'm gonna say. Pregnancy journey. Got over the nausea, leading into a hot, humid climate for like the next, what felt like millennia. I was not a happy pregnant lady. Not at all. I felt, like I said, I just felt so uncomfortable. I could only lie on one side, which was my right hand side, and I had to do this even earlier than my previous pregnancy. I felt like I had to be the lady that had to be up at 90 degrees if I was seated. Reclining felt horrible right from the start, and lying on my side was the only option. At nighttime, I couldn't even lie on my back. Early on, I had to lie on my side. Left hand side. Sleeping was horrible, felt like my hips were constantly aching. It was just not. Making me love pregnancy at all, and I felt tired. I couldn't do yoga, I couldn't do dancing. The most I could get through was Pilates, which I feel like supported me and kept me together to some degree right from the start. But other than that. That's all I had the energy for. And I just felt so zapped. I think the weather and the climate zapped me having a 2-year-old running after her. Yes, that was a bit tiring. Although I lived for the day naps. Ava would have at least one day nap. I'd lived for those. And towards the end of the pregnancy, France, I stepped in and he did a lot of the nighttime naps. Daddy put down, if anybody seen Bluey, that was him, so that I could just go to sleep. And he said, you are growing a baby. You need to get your rest. I'm like, thank God I'm going to bed. Whew. Shame you can't bank sleep.'cause I would've like clocked up a few megaliters I think, of sleep or whatever. Whatever volume you would measure sleep in. Anyway, so we decided to have a gender reveal, only because Ava was of surprise. I was fairly convinced this was gonna be another girl.'cause as I said, I'd always see intuitively in my mind, two girls. And I felt like that was the strongest. But we wanted to do a gender reveal because I just wanted to know whether or not I had to keep Ava's closed. Like I'd kept everything and I kept looking at the chest. I've got this massive like T chest, and I was like, do I have to get rid of any of this stuff? Do I keep any of this stuff? I just wanna know. So we did a gender reveal and kept it really casual. It was actually for my birthday. So I think a few weeks before we'd got the note to say, congratulations, you are having a boy or girl. And funnily enough, I got the letter from our midwife after we'd done the test and the NIP test, and I said to Franso, I've got the gender of the baby here in this envelope. Do we hold onto it and just wait for the day that we do the gender reveal? Or do you wanna look at it now? And he's like, I wanna look at it now. I'm like, okay, let's do it. So actually we have a little video where we've recorded what our thoughts were in our feelings and stuff like that. In that moment. Anyway, so I, I go, what do you think? And he's like a boy. And I was like, nah, it's definitely a girl. Anyway, so we opened the envelope, scan the envelope. Tracy had highlighted the section that said a girl. I'm like, we're having another girl. It's so exciting. Um, so we planned to do it for my birthday. We were just like, look, we've got family around on that day anyway. I don't really feel like I wanna do it in any other way. Let's just do it. On that day, we were just meeting down at the park. We were having like some, like a takeaway dinner there. And what I did was I took two dresses.'cause I was trying to go under the belief that I didn't know what I was having. And I said to Michelle, Francois's other daughter and Ava's sister, this is the envelope. It's a highlighted there as to what we're having. Whatever we are having, put Ava in that colored dress. So pink dress, if it's a girl and a blue dress, if it's a boy. And we'll all sit with our backs to you. You get it changed, and then we'll turn around. So that's how we did our gender reveal, which was really sweet and really fun. Yeah, so Ava wore a pink dress. Everybody's like, oh my God, having another girl. So that was a really cool moment. January we went to Perth, and I have to say, going down to Perth, even though it was summertime, just being out of humidity and being in slightly cooler weather was such a godsend and a blessing for myself, for my morale, for my energy, for my self-esteem, all the things. And my last hurrah for work was going to do the level one Sound bath training I had felt like this little soul had been egging me on, supporting me, had been guiding me throughout the whole entire year where I went all in on my business and really pushed myself to do things that I hadn't done before or had been dreaming of doing. So, workshops, trainings, and that kind of thing. And had she had been really behind this energy of the entrepreneurs, and this, I just can't describe it, but this angelic energy that was behind me, supporting me through all these moments. And the last thing I had to do, the last major hurdle before I went on maternity leave was doing the level one sound bath training. In that time, that was a really special time for me because it was such an important moment within my business that I was really like stepping into something that I now see myself doing more of once I go back into work life once and moving forwards. And I'm really excited to get back into that. And then this for me was the culmination of my working year. During I think second trimester towards third, I declined doing the glucose tolerance test to see if I had gestational diabetes. Honestly, I was not going to relive that experience. I did that the first time and holy moly, it wiped me out for the whole day. I hated it. I had to sleep in the pathology clinic in between the blood tests that you do because drinking that stupid bottle of glucose that syrupy crap. I just feel like it's such a horrible experiment on women and there should has, there has to be a better way, even a better way, from the alternative that I had to do. And I still wonder like how precise this is because based on my experience and coming at it from this end, so generally what you do is you fast from the night before you go into the clinic first thing in the morning. They take a before, during, and after blood test or thereabouts. And you gotta drink this syrup and then see how your blood sugars react and all that insulin and blah, blah, blah. To consuming this syrup, it wiped me out. I had to sleep in the pathology. As I said before in this clinic. The nurse had to come in and wake me up to do the blood test each time, and each time I just fell back asleep and she's like, I'm so sorry to disturb you. I'm like, no, you do what you have to do. I just can't cope right now. I don't even know how I drove myself home. And then I spent the rest of the day sleeping because I was so wiped. I refused to do it this time. I said, there has to be another way. I'm not doing this. So they suggested Tracy gave me the alternative of doing blood testing, so pricking my finger four times a day and recording my blood sugar levels according to this little monitor. It's kind of something I think people with diabetes would use as well. Fine. I'll prick my finger a hundred times a day if you want me to. I ain't drinking any bottle of syrup here. And what came out of that was such interesting observations on the fluctuation of my blood sugars according to things I felt that I'd eaten during the day or the night before. However, because I do it in a two week bracket, in that time, there was some little spikes in my readings. So if they go above a certain level, they consider that perhaps you've got gestational diabetes. I know, and I knew I didn't have it. I could relate it back to everything that I had, like the two spikes. I could literally say I had a very indulgent, lazy weekend sitting by a resort pool with my sister, just eating like lovely, indulgent food, mocktails and blah, blah, blah, and doing very little movement. Of course, my blood sugars are gonna look weird, but then when you look at every other week or every other day, it was fine. So because of that, they kind of marked me as potentially having gestational diabetes, which I was like, oh, I hate being labeled as something that I know I'm not. And then they suggested that I do some more testing again a few weeks later for another week. I did that and I, again, I could see, or for two weeks the fluctuations, or I could see that it was more consistent. And then they asked me to do it another time and I'm like, man, like can't you see that? I can relate this back to if things do look a bit odd, I can relate it to what I've eaten in that day or when I've done it. But if you looked at like my fasting, so in the mornings when I've done a reading, they're all within the parameters. Like there's nothing to say otherwise, in my opinion. Anyway, they asked me to go speak to a diabetes educator, which I actually personally know. And she looked at me and she's like, you don't have gestational diabetes. You are just all baby, you're just 100% all baby. And yes, if you look at what you eat, it does affect the reading. And if you do a reading and initially it looks a bit high, perhaps just go drink some water, do some squats. That's literally what she said. Like, go for a walk, come back and do the reading again, and then see where you're at. So I took that in my mind and I was happy with what she said. I was still marked, if you wanna say, still marked woman. And the other thing going into my pregnancy, I asked my midwife to check on and to monitor my platelets because with Ava, for some reason, I felt like it was just put on me at the very last minute that perhaps I'd have to go to Perth to have. Our baby because my platelet levels were low. And I'm like, what the hell is this? Like, I've never heard of this before. So to give you a quick background, Broome Hospital, while it has some amazing facilities and services, doesn't have the facilities as what a city neuro metropolitan hospital does to do a blood transfer where they specifically transfer your platelets. So blood platelets are created in your bone marrow. And they are in charge of blood clotting. So if you have low platelet levels, there could be potential risk of bleeding out or your blood not clotting if you've been cut and things like that. So people who can be like anemic I guess. And then if you want a blood transfusion, they can do it at the hospital. But platelets is a no. And in pregnancy, if it drops below a certain line, then you have to go or a level where they're comfortable being able to have you still be there. If you drop below the line, then you have to go to Perth. And in my first pregnancy, I felt like this was dropped on me very late in the game and I was caught unawares and it really sent me into a tailspin. This time around I'm like, just keep me informed. Let's just be open-minded the whole way through and see where we are going. So towards the end, I did several blood tests. It was all looking amazing. Like I was above the line, well above the line, everything was looking amazing. There wasn't any question that my platelet levels would resume to normal post pregnancy, that this is just a pregnancy thing, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, I'm not worried. I just wanna know, am I here or am I there? And or if you can hear that funny little snoring in the background. That's Isla. She's just fallen asleep. She's a bit of a noisy sleeper, by the way. Anyway, yes, I'm talking about your babes. So that was one thing I wanted to know right from the start, and I will record another episode later on about how I used Australian bush flower essences throughout my pregnancy and some of the things that I had worked on in that time. Okay, so one blood test came back, as I said, above the line, we're all happy. High five, you're staying. And then at 38 weeks. The next round of blood testing, they said, let's just have a look at this. Let's just see where you're at. Did the blood test on the Monday, got the telephone call on the Wednesday saying it's dropped and it's sitting just above the gray area. You'll need to do another blood test on Friday. And then depending where that sits, we may have to have this conversation about induction. I'm like, that's okay. By this time I was done. I'm done being pregnant. I'm done feeling massive. I'm done feeling tired, feeling hot, feeling swollen, feeling all the things. Ila was such a different baby as well, like it really proves that every pregnancy is different. While everything was fine growing, swimming, getting, you know, all the things that were coming back with positive ultrasounds and blood tests for everything else. By the time I got to 38 weeks, the conversation had been. I'm not going above 40 because I feel massive. And if she hasn't come early, yes. Well, let's have a conversation about induction. I don't really wanna be induced because I don't really like the restriction that you're given or that you find yourself in because you're hooked up to her, like perhaps monitors and all sorts of things. And so I feel like your freedom to move around isn't there. In my mind, my ideal birth plan was to stay at home, be in my outdoor shower. That front had beautifully designed for us. Do as much time in the shower and the water as possible, be at home, and then just go into hospital and do what I needed to do. When the time came, kind of a repeat of Ava, and I felt like if I'd done it once before, it could potentially happen again. Ava came early, this baby could come early. There were so many things that I was hoping for, but at the same time wasn't held, bent on like I was. If this happens, it happens, and if it doesn't, it doesn't. I didn't really get involved in too much like mindset stuff beforehand. I even felt like towards the end I was like, oh, I haven't even done my hypnobirthing meditations, which I think I only listened to maybe one or two, and I was like, oh, I haven't even done some of my pregnancy yoga, which I had learned first time around and felt really helpful towards the later stages in pregnancy. So I felt like everything was not quite rushed, but kind of forgotten in a way, or just pushed to one side. And again, yes, I think it's because having Ava. I just didn't have that time to just sit, relax, put my feet up, and just chill out. I was, you know, you're kind of in the thick of things with a kid, with your first kid. You're sort of doing all the activities, you're taking care of them, you're being present with them. So the opportunities to just sit and do nothing with kind of like at the bottom of the pile of, you know, life demands. Anyway, so if anything, I had this small sense of guilt that I hadn't devoted a lot of energy or my mindset towards positive birthing experience or really sort of putting that intention as to what I would like to experience this birth as, or even just that connection to Isla. With Ava, I felt very connected the whole time. This time round, it was like, yes, I could sense her energy, but I couldn't really quite tune into it as much in terms of like, I guess like there was an element I was tuning into it, but there was an element that I was sort of not communicating as much as to towards the end as to what I did with Ava. You know, like visualizing, you know, having the baby in the right position and all that kind of stuff, and having conversations about, well, we're ready and we're excited to meet you, and things like that. I did have this moment also towards the end of a lot of nostalgia of, and realization that this was the last few moments that I would have with Ava and. Then very soon we'd be a family of four and things would change. And as one friend had written in a message to me saying, yes, but when the next baby comes, you won't even feel like, you'll feel like that's how it's always meant to be. And that the family of three was, while that was part of life for quite a number of years, now it's as it is and it's always meant to be. I hope I worded that the right way. But I had this realization of, this is my last few moments where it's just me and Ava, and I hope this counts. Like I hope I've given this enough attention and made these last few final moments, precious enough, because very soon we'll have another baby, which I'm really excited to meet and have in our life. But those moments where it's just over me will change it. And I'm not saying that we'll never have that, but it'll be just in a different way and it might not be as frequent as what it was and how it has been without Isla. So there was that little moment that came through. Anyway, I couldn't remember it today. I was trying to remember. I know one of my consults with our doctor. I went in and. Everything was fine. Like all our conversations had been really open. I felt highly supported by my doctor and she was like, you know, I see that your age and IVF and everything like that. While they are things that we take very seriously. Because we wanna make sure that the baby kids, you know, is healthy, is developing, that the birth is successful, that you basically leave here with a healthy, alive, you know, fully grown, developed baby, all those kind of things. We still need to have these conversations of maybe we need to induce you. We need to just take these things in mind. So I was fully open to that. I wasn't resistant, but at the same time I was fully open to it. Probably one thing I felt throughout this whole pregnancy was that I just wanted to be left alone. At times I was like, oh, do I have to go to another appointment, another blood test, another ultrasound? So my enthusiasm probably wasn't as up there with Ava, where it's like, Ooh, first time round of doing this, this is exciting. Ooh baby, this, ooh baby that, ooh, attention on me this time round. I was like, can I just call you when we are like going into labor? Can you just leave me alone? And so I think somewhere in there, I remember being in the doctor's office. And she's like, how you going? And I just burst into tears and I can't remember what the thing was that was really triggering me, but I know it was this sense of like, I'm just kind of getting tired and I'm a little bit over this whole entire experience. Nothing else is really bad, but there was some, I can't remember it now. I'd have to ask. And he probably doesn't remember. There was just this big emotional sense, and I think it was just like a lot of it wasn't even opinions. Like I've never really sort of been bothered too much by other people's opinions. I can't remember what it was. Anyway, let's go forwards. 38 weeks leading into 39, hoping for a repeat that this kid just comes out. I'd had some of that preterm labor feels. And lots of really like deep rolling, if I could say it. Rolling movements from Isla. You know, at times she would kind of like tickle me down into my hip, which was a really funny experience, but she just rolls a lot. Whereas I felt like Ava was fluttering, like Ava would flutter around. Isla rolled and I also noticed that at 35 weeks my tummy had dropped because I felt like my diaphragm had opened up and I could breathe again. And I was noticing how much my stomach was dropping so much more than what it did with Ava. You just noticed so much about your body, honestly. And side note throughout this whole entire thing, while we have really strong minds and we can like get so caught up in our head about everything, if you took a step back and just observed at how fricking amazing your body is, that it can like grow a baby, that it just does what it needs to do when it's developing this baby. Like if we get out of its way and if we get out of our own way, the human body is incredible. Like it really is. And even birthing, like it just does what it has to do. It just does what it has to do. Like you don't have control. You don't really have a lot of control. What happens? It just does it. So nothing had happened by this Friday. Mom was looking after Ava. The conversation at the hospital was, your levels have dropped even further. Were very, very much above the gray area. These are your options. Get induced today and you can go home with a baby or come back tomorrow, which will be a whole new staff, a whole new team, whole new conversation. More testing if you wait over the weekend, if that's what you really wanna do. But the tests on Monday, come back saying you've hit below this line, you're gonna have to go to Perth. And I just looked at my doctor and I said, I'm done. Like mom's looking after Ava today. Fran was here with me. Let's just do this. Like I'm ready. Like even by then I was ready and I was spending like the last couple of weeks walking around going, I'm so bored. I'm done. I've done everything. I've had my time. I've got my nails painted. I've like been going to Pilates. I've been doing all the, you know, taking care of myself. Everything's organized at home. Nothing's last minute. Like, let's just do this. I'm ready to get to the other side. Like I'm done with being pregnant. I'm done with looking massive. I'm done with people staring at me. I'm done wearing these stupid compression socks and these maternity shorts. I'm done. She said, okay, so these are the process. So I know with induction there's different options and what she suggested for me was hook me up to a monitor. Hook me up to the IV drip and we'll do the synthetic hormone. This the oxytocin hormone, was it syn? A cincin or cincin? I don't even know what I'm saying now. And there's every guarantee that your body will remember exactly what it's meant to do. We'll then break your waters and we'll just allow the process to go from there. But we monitor your body and the process, so through this IV drip. So basically they start you on a low dose and then they kind of ramp it up periodically according to how you're responding. So that basically within a few hours you should have a baby on the other side. And they just encouraging your body, if you wanna say inverted commas, to go through the whole birth process and to bring on your contractions and to kind of like monitor it in a way so that it's a bit more stabilized, I guess. So. I was like, all right, let's just do this. Like I'm done. Like my platelets is something that I can't control. Like I can't take anything or do anything within 24 hours or within the next two hours to make myself have more platelets because platelets is created in your bone marrow. And it's not like you could take iron tablets to give you more iron or do anything in that respect. And this was the other thing that I knew that at the same time that the midwives that would be available for us on the day would be the most supportive and energetically aligned professionals. And they were. I had Christina and I had Pippa, and I also had another doctor available who was a mum friend of mine. So I was so excited and so happy to have these beautiful souls working with us on this day. I was like, let's do it. Let's just do it today. Again, I wasn't really happy that I'd have to be in hospital so early, all throughout the whole thing or hooked up to an IV and feel a bit restricted. But I could still be in the shower. I wasn't gonna be able to have a water birth and that was okay as well. I could easily take my mind to my outdoor shower and being out there in the starry night, often when I'm at nighttime having a shower, I look up at the stars and it's just such a beautiful experience. I could take myself there. I had my music to keep me relaxed and I was really like just kind of impressed at how kind and how supportive and helpful and respectful the midwives were. Like I said, I want minimal talking. I just wanna be left alone. But they sort of were there to help me when I needed things, which was really like, oh you, you can bring me a heat pack. I need a heat pack and you can bring me one or you know, you can help me into the shower and you can do that. Like I was sort of with Ava, I was at home and 'cause that was quite a long experience. Apart from Franwell, like you're sort of just in the thick of it. Whereas this felt really supported. So you get hooked up with this thing that sits on your belly and that monitors, I think your vitals and the baby's vitals and then, and it sort of gives you the allowance to sort of move around a little bit. But then at the same time, you've gotta baby drip in your arm. So I sort of had to wheel this thing around, this trolley around. It did feel a bit awkward that I'm just like trying to be in my little zone and listen to my relaxed music. But there's other people around me, like there was a midwife always in the room just checking the monitors and everything and I felt like she's gonna stand here the whole time and just wouldn't stand, but just be around and just watch me and the monitor the whole time. Like poor thing, like she can't go away and just have a little break and come back later. France had gone home, checked on Ava, checked on Mom, come back, and he was just kind of sitting in the chair. I. You know, and I'm like, this is really awkward. This feels really weird. It feels really awkward. So I started on the mat just doing lots of sort of all four, like when the contraction started getting stronger, just sort of doing a lot of rocking, a lot of being on all fours, leaning on a ball. And then eventually I said, I need to go into the shower. I feel cold. So I went into the shower and I could have water on my back, but obviously not my front. And that was fine. So Franzo stood there. So Franso was so, funnily enough had come wearing jeans.'cause we both know how cold he gets when he is in like hospital environments or indoors. But at the same time, he didn't bring any shorts to wear if he needed to get into the shower with me. So they rolled, took his socks off and rolled up his jeans as best they could. But he had to sort of just stand there and hold the water on my back. And by then, I don't know what hour that was. That was probably, that was the other thing, like being in the birthing suite. Like there was a clock and I kept looking at the clock going, 'cause Fran and I just laughed and said like, what time, how long do you reckon this is gonna take? Or what time's the baby coming? And I had the number five in my head. So we said like five o'clock or five 30. And I remember looking at the clock going, oh, it's getting close to 4, 4 30. Like now. It's like, whatever. And I'm like, well the baby's still not here. Like I can feel the contractions are getting stronger, but I need to go into the shower now. I don't know how long I was in there for. I couldn't sit. It felt really uncomfortable. And I could only sort of lean, I could lean on a ball or a chair or something. I can't even remember now. But the hot water on my back was just so relieving. So somewhere in there, towards the end of being in the shower, I was like, oh, I feel so nauseous. Like I could feel the contractions getting stronger. And that sense of, all right, now we're really getting into the thick of things. There's no turning back. And I hadn't opted for like epidural. And obviously, you know, certainly wasn't going for a C-section, but in my mind with that pain I'm like, wow, I know why people opt for both those things now. Is it too late for me? What the hell am I doing here? Why didn't I tick those boxes? It was exactly the same kind of like thoughts and feelings that I had from the first time round anyway. So grateful as well to be in hospital where they can give you anti-nausea medication.'cause I said I feel like I'm going to be sick or I need to do a poo. I don't know which way it's going. So they said, you're feeling sick, I'll give you some anti-nausea medication. And I think that's also a sign of like, okay, we are getting into like the final sort of stages towards active labor. So they gave me the anti-nausea stuff and that felt amazing. And then the next thing I said was like, I think I need to get back on the bed. And I literally just managed to crawl onto the bed. And in my mind I was like, just lie on your right hand side. That's the only side. I couldn't be on the left, so I couldn't see the monitor or the midwives. So I was on the right hand and then the doctor, my friend Nadia came in and she's like, well, maybe if you wanna try like leaning over the back of the bed or different positions. And I'm like, no, I can only be on my side. This is all I've got the energy for. And I just literally at that moment felt very tired and like adrenaline had been pushing me and that my legs were tired, my body was tired, I wasn't sure if I could go any longer. So they managed to wedge a peanut ball between my legs and I could really feel the contractions getting very, very strong. And I could see on the IV drip, like the level of oxytocin coming through. And I was like, you need to make it less. I feel like there's too much in my system. Like, turn it down, turn it down. And then they said, well, would you like us to offer you some gas?'cause in that process I must've said something like, I am done. I've hit the eject button. Somebody like, get this baby out. Like, I don't want to be here anymore. I can't do this. Which. Literally when a woman starts climbing the walls and wanting to exit, you know, we're in the last final stages. And in my mind I'm like, this is it. We are going, it's happening.'cause the contractions were getting a lot stronger. So they were turning down the drip and I kept saying, more, more, turn it down more, more, more. Because I could just feel it flooding through my system. And it was almost at that moment where my mind and my body was saying, they can turn this off now 'cause we've got this. So they managed to turn it down, but it still felt quite strong. And as I was lying there and I went through some really big contractions, the next minute I just felt like Ila just went whoosh. And I just said to them as they were trying to get the gas to me, which I think I only managed to shove in my mouth for a little bit. And then I said, she's here, she's coming. And I just literally felt her just dive down. And then I felt like everybody sort of just zoomed to the southern end and it was like, okay, this is all happening. And I could literally see in my mind. Her face, I could see ALA's face and I just kept saying, chin to chest, lead through your head. Like I just kept saying, chin to chest, we can do this, we can do this. And I don't think it took very long. And then next minute there was that whoosh and that really gushy, soft, squishy moment when they sort of put the baby on your chest and you know you're at the other side, like it's all done. And in the end, I only had done 30 minutes of active labor and she was here, she was done. And it took five and a half hours. So there's my number five. Overall, I'm so grateful and thankful for that experience and that it was like for a fraction, it felt like a fraction of the time compared to Ava. My body knew what it was doing. It just needed some guidance and I felt so supported and so taken care of in that moment. And on that day, I couldn't have asked for a better. Process and experience. Like, I'm just so grateful. So we only had to stay in hospital for one night. Uh, the funny flip side to everything is that France, I went home around about, I think it was about like 10 by the time we got home, or maybe a bit earlier. But anyway, by the time we got to bed and everything and just relaxed and processed everything that night, he actually was sick, was very sick During the week, Ava had been sick, vomiting. I'd been like sick a couple of weeks before and now it was Frances turned. So when I spoke to him on Saturday, he's like, I've just been up all night throwing up and I'm like, oh, this is not good. This is not good at all. Um, he chose the name Isla. So when we had our moment to ourselves in the birth suite. Before he went home, he said, I've seen this name somewhere and I really quite like it. It's Isla and I think it's a really good name for us. And I said, I love it. That's a great choice. Let's call her Isla. And I chose the middle name Amari, which was the suggestion by my sister-in-law, so Francois's sister. She had suggested that, and that means beauty and strength. And I was like, that's a perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect meaning and name for Isla. So Isla and Mari, that's her birth story. I'm so grateful that the next day I was in a quiet ward. There was only me and another lady, and I felt like I had the whole day just to relax and be quiet with Isla and have her and me time like to just decompress and just process everything. When the midwife took Isla to do her initial like checks and things like that, I went into the shower. In the birth suite just to, you know, rinse off and get myself together. Anyway, Franco came to the door of the shower and he was like, is this what I'm using for Isla? Like, is this what we are dressing her in? Blah, blah, blah. And because it wasn't quite as severe as the first time around, but because my body, my tummy had been quite high after the baby had come out, you know, everything just drops. And I felt like my diaphragm had opened up. I was really struggling to walk or to even like stand up straight. And the midwife said, oh, you might wanna sit down on a chair or lean on something if that feels more comfortable. But I couldn't speak. And she's like, are you okay? I'm like, no, I can't speak. Like, it felt really hard to speak because my diaphragm had been squished and now it had dropped and I was just struggling. So Franso had come to the door to ask me a question. I'm like, I can't talk. He's like, what? I said, I can't talk. I just felt really winded, basically. And it was for me when I sat in that shower and I just let the water wash over me. It was my time to like decompress and to just try and remember as much of the process as possible because I knew that this was the last time I would do this. This was it. This was the final time and I wasn't going back again. And even a few days later when we were at home, I came out from the bedroom and I'd been putting some of my maternity stuff away and I was crying, bro was like, what's wrong? And I said, I don't ever wanna be pregnant again. And I certainly don't wanna go through birth again. But I'm really sad because that's it. Like I'm never gonna be these things again. Like this for us. Is it like, I don't believe there's another child. I don't think we are gonna be pregnant again. And this is it. Like I can now get rid of all my pregnancy stuff, which I've just been so excited to do. But now that I'm doing it, it feels really sad to say like to close that. And even though it is like two small moments within my life, it's done. Like we are here on this other side and as Franso said, we're sitting outside, I think just a couple of days after Isla was born and it was raining and we're watching the rain and Ava's playing outside and he said, it's done now. Like this is our family and this is our life. Like our family's now complete, she's here. And I said, yeah, it's true, isn't it? Like we've been waiting for these things and now she's here. It's like everything that we've been imagining can now start coming to life. Like the things we wanna do as a family, like the places we wanna travel to and the experiences we wanna have. Like it's all now. It's now on this moment in time. So yeah, remembering newborn life is something that I deeply filed away, if not had deleted. So first night was pretty much okay in the hospital. Second night, the Grizzles, we were already at home. Third night and fourth night cluster feeding, it's like, whoa, I've totally forgotten newborn life. But now that we're six weeks in and I cannot believe my baby is now into her triple zeros, I'm like, where's my little newborn, teen, tiny girl gone? We're in a little routine, a little process, a little habit, knowing that everything changes again in another month and another month after that, and time after that. We are just in the swing of things, and I'm so grateful that this year I have Francis around all the time. He has a whole year off from work, basically like a sabbatical, and in many ways I don't even have to think about how I would do everything if he had not been around. And to have like another pair of hands where we can sort of basically divide and conquer when it comes to the kids is just such a relief and it's so helpful rather than having to rely on my mom all the time or trying to juggle things logistically. It's such a blessing. So I'm so grateful for that. And we also have this time of freedom and flexibility to plan holidays and do adventures and go places. So in um, hopefully another month's time, we'll be doing our first camping experience as a family. And we have some other fun adventures planned for this year because yeah, ILA here and this is what we do as a family. We go on adventures. I'm giving myself at least six months for maternity leave, so I don't really feel I'm going to be coming back to doing Soundbars, if anything, until October. And my intention is just to be fully present within this maternity leave time, but also use this time wisely. So catch you up on podcasts, courses that I had subscribed to and hadn't started or completed doing a little bit of self-development as well. So there we go. Another epically long episode. But in many ways I'm grateful that this is my time and chance to document this journey. It's time. Capture it so I can remember it in many ways as I possibly can. And again, thank you for listening and hanging in there. And if you've got any questions or if you're going on your own like pregnancy journey and you wanna talk a little bit more about what I experienced, please reach out. I'm here to help or offer advice or suggestions and knowing that everybody's journey is different and unique and special to them. And always just remember like as much as they say, go and have a birth plan, which I believe is like setting an intention. Like this is my intention, this is what I hope for, this is what I'm intending at the end of the day. It's not just you. It's you and baby. And there's many things that sometimes we can't control or factor in. And. Honestly, listen to Spirit babies, because I think sometimes it helps put our mind at ease in a way that sometimes our babies need to experience certain things and processes because that's their journey and that's part of their soul agreement for this lifetime. So again, I say that I truly believe that through the IVF journey, which I was so reluctant to do at the start, is because ILA and Ava have just needed the most like best optimal physical vessels, so bodies in this lifetime to do whatever it is that they're meant to do. However, they're meant to contribute to this world and the way we did our IVF has supported us in being able to conceive and birth these beautiful girls. So honor yourself, honor your baby's journey, and just spend that time connecting to the spirit of your baby just being quiet like undistracted like. No screen time, no TV time. Just be in that element of connecting to your baby even where in when they're in the womb, even when they're out of the womb, because they're still in that beautiful spiritual bubble when they are born. And I tell you what, Isla has had several moments where she's deeply, I feel like laser beamed me with her eyes. Done a sort of intense report on my own soul, and Franso felt the same. And funnily enough, today I said to her, I need to speak to you on a subconscious level. Like speak to your subconscious mind. And the way she looked at me, it was like, oh, okay. So you wanna speak to me on a different level, not just a conscious level. It was really, really cute and really, really amazing. It was a quite a funny moment actually. But yes, thank you for listening. Thank you for being part of this journey with me. I hope you found it insightful and just entertaining or interesting, and I look forward to sharing some. More Ted talks on mindset, on soundbars, on affirmations. I'm really having some good time here just to sit and reflect and think about what and how I want this podcast to be and how I want to use it moving forwards, and how it can be of better value for you as a listener. And of course, I'm gonna be doing a few polls and surveys as to what you want, how long, blah, blah, blah, when I get back behind the desk in front of the laptop and start crafting more amazing courses and all sorts of fun things for you. Anyway, I hope you're well. I hope you're fabulous. Have the most amazing day, sending you so much love, and I look forward to connecting to you all with you, I should say in the next episode. Bye. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening to today's episode. Please rate and review this podcast so that it can continue to thrive and reach more listeners. I love to know who my listeners are, so please screenshot this episode and tag me on Instagram at Anna f Hasty, and I look forward to connecting with you in the next episode.