Hello everyone. Welcome to the Hormone Helper Podcast. I'm Coach Andrew, your hormone helper from Fit for All Fitness. I personally coach over 1600 men and women to help better understand their hormones so they can lose weight and get their metabolism back on track. With this podcast, you're gonna hear from me and my special guests about everything from metabolism to thyroid to weight loss,

and we even talk a little bit a sexy time as we chat to spread more knowledge thick, like butter on your hormones. If you're ready to learn, I'm ready to share. So let's do this. Hello everybody. Welcome back to the podcast Super Pump. To have everyone on today's podcast is going to be something a little different. I know through the Hormone Helper Podcast.

My initial goal with this was really just to talk about hormones, health, anything to do with health. But then I realized that a lot of the mindset, the actions, the habits, people's relationships, and even just the patterns that they get stuck in or looped in every single day has a lot to do with somebody's health. So my decision in this is to also start including conversations like this in the podcast as well too.

We're gonna talk about a lot about imperfect action and actually taking action today because I find that this is a really big sticking point with a lot of clients who come to us as well as I see this repeatedly coming up in my life, in my life of business, in my life of friendships, and I really want to address it. So going into this,

I want to lay out an example that literally just happened today because the way that it was affected through a business connection and the way that I ended up having to communicate this to someone else really ended up affecting me more than it probably should have. So the example goes like this. Essentially I did a business presentation and I had a test that I had given to everyone.

There's about 25, 28 people I can't remember in our, our business group. And essentially when I gave this test, this test was to show and elicit something that's called helpless learning. So a lot of my clients, they exhibit helpless learning where they fail repeated times, and because they re fail repeated times, what ends up happening is, is each time they fail,

it gives them a significantly higher chance of failing in their weight loss journey or in their health journey. Again, this can be found literally in every aspect of life. Like if you have a kid do sports and they're always, always coming in last, they just perform poor and poor versus the child who maybe runs their first race, gets a first place medal,

and then continues to go on and continues to succeed when you succeed and keep succeeding back to back to back, you are on a fast track and you see a lot more expedited results than someone who is failed 3, 4, 5 times and is now in this head space and mindset that they're now going to fail repeatedly over and over again. So this example that I put out for my business colleagues was really about showing them what helpless learning is and how our clients experience it.

So essentially I gave out of the the 25 people that were there, I gave 20 people the A test that was solvable. So all of the answers they, they actually were able to solve the questions and then I randomly selected five people and I made that test not solvable. So regardless of how they tried to look at those questions, there was no way that they could get an answer to those questions.

So the intention was after the fact, after we went through the exercise to ask the people who repeatedly failed each question, how they felt, and then to ask them how they felt, the fact that every other person got the question right, but they didn't. And see a lot of times for our health, that's exactly what happens. It's what happens with other coaching programs.

It's what happens when you're seeing a lot of people's success and results on Instagram. You get to this point where you're seeing someone do a diet and it helps with their weight. You're seeing someone make a nutrition habit or change their routine and they are seeing results. Now they claim that that answer is the answer for the the problem because it worked for them.

When you go and you take that answer and you try to apply it for yourself, it might not be the answer for you. So what ends up happening is it doesn't work and then you get discouraged. So through this example that I was showing my business colleagues was really about being able to show the people who failed that this is how you feel and this is how my clients feel through the process.

The reason why I'm bringing up this example is going through the example as I was asking who got question one, right? Knowing that there were five people in the group who there was no way that they could have the question, right? Lo and behold, I saw four out of the five hands raise, which means one of two things. One, they could have been really embarrassed and maybe they just didn't wanna be that person who got it wrong.

So they fed a little bit, not a big deal, it's not a problem. Or two, they weren't willing to participate and they weren't willing to apply action. They weren't willing to take action to actually put effort to doing something so small as a part of a presentation. Either way, when I look at those two things, I see those two things that appear in their life as a an exact result of who they are,

and I caution a lot of our clients about this because it's very, very, very important that your actions are in alignment and match what you are trying to do and what you want to do. Because I can look at those four people and I can make the assumption that they lied and never do business with them again. If they are willing to lie on a quest on a test that really has no relevance,

makes no sense, is not gonna change anyone's life. If they're willing to lie there or they're willing to lie to the people that I refer them to, maybe friends or family members, this is how I think at the highest level. I even think of this for myself as well too. So if I'm the type of person that tells people that I get up early,

but I'm getting up at 10:00 AM that's lying, and I could tell all of my clients and say, You need to get up early every single day and tell that till I'm blue in the face if I'm not prepared to do those things. And if I'm not doing those things, I'm being disingenuous with my message. And also I'm leading people astray because my actions don't match who I am.

And that's why it's so important that everything that you say you're going to do, you do. The second part is, what if someone didn't wanna participate? This goes along with the helpless learning part of this. Whenever someone comes to us and they're struggling with their hormones, they're struggling with their metabolism, I ask them what they have tried. I ask them what they tried for a a multitude of reasons.

One, I wanna see what hasn't worked. I wanna see what they've been willing to do on their own, and I wanna see what about it didn't work for them because maybe the tool was right, maybe the diet was right, but it wasn't realistic for their lifestyle, or it was too hard for somebody to maintain, or maybe it was said in a way where it was very negative and it gave them a very negative mindset.

There's a lot of reasons why things for your health can fail. So I like to figure out those things. The second thing as well too is I wanna see at what point did someone give up? So usually when clients come to us, they've tried at least four to five times on their own. So everyone tries to diet by themselves. They all try to either like join the gym or to start working out,

and then if those things don't work, they'll either resort to one or two more things, but go and see an naturopathic doctor or they'll go to their doctor and they might be prescribed a medication to either help balance their hormones or help with their weight. So once they've tried those four or five things, it's not that they can't try other stuff. It's not that they can't keep trying diets or that they can't keep doing all of these nutrition changes,

they can, they just no longer have the willpower, the gas or the mental head space to be able to say to themselves, I actually can do this. And people get in helpless learning cycles all the time where you start a new job and the first week at the new job, you're slow. So you go through the rest of your career saying,

I'm just slower than everyone else. When the reality is is it's only because you were not successful or you didn't do those things the best way the first time. That's what gets stuck into your mind over and over again. We think if I failed at this before, I'll fail again. If I fell down, the risk of falling down happens. We even see this in children.

So speaking of full length down, which is great, when you look at young kids, young kids are absolutely fearless. Kids will climb trees, they'll climb rocks, they'll throw things, they'll put their hands in places. But where does the fear happen? The fear happens when a child gets hurt or when it sees the reaction of someone else. So a kid can go his entire life climbing a tree,

not have a single problem in the world. There's no fear, there's no concern of failure because every time they climbed a tree, nothing happened. And then they climb a tree, they fall off and they hit their head and they cry. From that moment onwards, there is a subconscious mechanism that says there is a danger behind what we are trying to do.

And it is that mechanism of danger where if you keep hitting that mechanism over and over again, the danger becomes more and more imminent. And this is where people get stuck with any action that they're trying to do. I talk about obviously actions for their health, whether starting a new diet or starting a new routine, but really it could be too afraid to go for that promotion for a job because you're like,

Well, every time I asked for the promotion, the first two times they said no. So I'm never gonna ask a third time because the answer's still gonna be no, you assume that you're gonna fail. Now let me bring back that example. So the four people, they either didn't tell the truth or you know, they were too embarrassed to say that,

that they did tell the truth. Now, what about that one person who did tell the truth, and I knew she would tell the truth because she's a very truthful person. Now, when we got to that third question, I asked her if she got an answer, she said, I didn't even try. And that's what happens. The second part of failing repeatedly for your health over and over again,

you give up to the point where even if you know there's an answer, or even if you know there's something else to try, you're just not willing to invest that time with the possibility of failure. So right now, I want you to picture a target. It's on a dart board, it's five feet away, anyone can hit it. You throw a couple practice starts and you're like,

The target is easy. That target is whatever your goal and whatever your dream is. Now I hand you the dart and I say, Hey, can you make that shot? You tell me yes. You literally tell me that you can make the shot, and then I stand in front of it and I tell you to take the shot. You won't because the risk is is I'm in front and you might hurt me.

And that's how all risk is measured in people's lives. We are afraid to fail, and we're afraid of getting hurt from our failures. So when clients come to us through the process afterwards, that's where the issue becomes the fear of failure. And my first question is, can I take someone past the fear of failure? Can I take them past the point where they say,

I can't to, I actually can, and this isn't a problem because that's how you maintain the changes in your lifestyle moving forward. People who can't maintain the changes are people who might work with a coach or might attempt something and it works. And then as they start reverting back into old habits, fear sets in and then they go, Oh, I actually can't do this.

I'm gonna screw up. It's too much. And then they fold. Then they're back to square one and everyone goes back to square one. But it's funny how even though you might fail your goal, even though you might not lose the weight, even though you might not get the job, there is always a minimum breaking point for every single person at which they say,

Enough is enough. Because as much as fear keeps us stuck, an exceptional amount of fear we will not tolerate. So there's a threshold to which every single human being says, Enough is enough. I literally cannot drop below this line. And that line is the level of your comfortability. So for example, maybe that line is 200 pounds, you're gaining weight,

you're gaining weight, it keeps coming up month over month, and you're like, Well, I'm not 200 yet. I'm not 200 yet. Then you hit 200 and you say, Nope, 200. Absolutely not. It's my cutoff point. And 200 is every time you start diving. There's a reason why, because that line between excessive danger and a real impact,

it's so fine that the body's like, I'm actually not willing to tolerate this. This is how people get stuck in these stubborn loop cycles. They're like, I want my goals. I want to feel good. I don't want any more bloating. I don't want any of these challenges, but for just some reason, I can't overcome this because you're in the in between land.

The land where your fear is enough to keep you where you are, but your fear is not enough to say, I'm not dealing with this anymore. Forget it. I'm gonna do something about it. And that's a very, very real place for people to live in. It's a place that I lived in probably for about five years of my life. And in truth,

it was probably the first five years that I became a coach, because I was desperate for a lot of things. I was desperate for people to approve me. I was desperate to make money because I had three jobs. I was desperate to find clients because at one point I was like, Well, I say I have a business, but I don't have anyone to coach.

I was desperate to be in a relationship because working on businesses so much, I didn't have a lot of time for somebody important in my life. So because of those things, I always lived in a chronic state of fear, and I made every decision, I made every choice. I did everything that I absolutely could, but it was because of fear.

And anytime you make a decision for your health, anytime you make a decision for yourself, that is fear-based, you will always self-sabotage and you will always revert back to where it was. And that's because fear is that thing that prevents you from growing. Now, sure, I'm not saying you're gonna eliminate fear from your life. Sure, you're gonna have fear as a part of your life,

but you cannot allow fear to prevent you from taking new actions. You have to be relentless in your search of progress, not just for your health, but also for yourself. For example, now that I have a successful coaching business, I'm not just going to stop learning. I'm not just gonna stop getting support or stop seeking the advice of business coaches.

I do that stuff because I want to continue to grow. I want to continue to put myself in levels of uncomfortability so that way I can learn and be better than I was before. If I were to look back on everything in my life that I did right? I don't, I don't know if I would use the word right, No, I'm gonna use the word right,

Everything that I look back and I was like, That was a right decision. That's a better way to put it. I did and I was uncomfortable doing it. Everything. Think about it, all of the decisions that made you happy, whether it was you deciding to have a kid, whether it was you making a decision to move to a different country,

whether it was seeking a job that might have been a little bit out of your expertise, but you knew you could do it, all of those things, they made you uncomfortable. And yet it was through that uncomfortability where you received new challenges, new growth opportunities, and the answer to a lot of the places where you were stuck. So where people find themselves stuck in their lives,

it's not because they often don't know what to do, but often because they're in a place where they failed at that thing so many times where they're just done, they're just not willing to take one more step unless they know that that step is guaranteed. But news flash, nothing in this world, Nothing in this world is guaranteed. I wish that I could guarantee you that you're gonna get it right next time.

There's no guarantee that the only guarantee that exists is that if you stay in this fear zone, this fear mentality of I'm too scared to take in action and I like the way my life is now, but I don't really like it and I'm really uncomfortable. If you live in that zone, the only constant is you're always gonna be in the same place.

And we've already established that you don't want to be there, that you're tired, that you're done with your, all of these health issues, that you're done with having these progressive challenges over and over again. So that's why I wanted to bring this up because I saw in those people, I saw a lot of helpless learning because they chose to be helpless learning,

and I saw a lot of helpless learning because they were just reactively, helpless learning. Some people know that they do that and they do it anyways, and some people genuinely don't know either way. I see it a lot. It's not a bad thing. I don't fault any of them for making the decisions that they make. That's not what this conversation is.

What it is, is its awareness. So the way that you take action consistently, the way that you can apply a habit or make a routine as a part of your schedule without always rescheduling it or shifting it, is consistency. It's consistency minus certainty. So you're gonna do it even though you're not sure that you're gonna get the result that you're looking for.

So when I started waking up at 4:00 AM and me and my wife wake up at 4:00 AM now, when I did it, the first three weeks was terrible, awful. I was tired, It sucked. I was like, Why am I doing this? I really didn't need to do this because being a coach, I can do my workouts in the evening.

I could do it in the middle of the day if I wanted to. There were a lot of reasons why I didn't have to do it. I didn't have to wake up at that time, and I could have chose every single day to do that action or to not do that action. But what I trusted was the end vision and my end goal of what waking up at 4:00 AM represented to me.

And that end goal was I would be able to have three hours before my entire day started to work on myself, to work on me, to prioritize my day so I could finish 10 times earlier than everyone else. So when people are working until five 30 or six 30, or sometimes eight 30 at night in their businesses, or they're doing workouts at 10 to 11:00 PM which is to me too late and and you're doing more damage than you are,

good, I already have that stuff done. I don't have to worry about that. My workout is done. Like I wake up at four, four to four 30, I eat four 30 to five 30, I wake up or, or I work out, I take my shower, and then guess what? I've got 15 minutes for me to, okay,

what's on the calendar for today? What do I have to do? And then my day begins. It's so easy. I don't even have to stress about doing the actions anymore. And that's how actions and routines don't become something that's a chore and become something that you look forward to. But day one or day two, or even the first three weeks of waking up at four sucked.

I was like, This makes no sense right now, but the end, Andrew, the higher Andrew, the one who is where I know that I can be said, you need to trust in the process. So if you're gonna imply actions, if you're at a place right now where you're like, I just don't know what to do, let's be real for a second and say,

You know that you could take one extra step more than you are yesterday. So what is that one extra step gonna be? Maybe you don't know the full solution, but maybe you know that you could be doing more. Maybe you know for a fact that you have the time. Maybe you know that you're avoiding specific actions or that you are not willing to make certain changes for the routine.

Maybe you simply know that the next step is you need to seek support. All of those things are positive. It means acknowledgement. I'm gonna leave you guys with a saying for this podcast. Your actions speak loud and proud to who you are. So if you're gonna say you're gonna do something, do it not for anyone else, not for the people you said you were gonna do it for,

but for you because you're a person of your word. Condition, your friends to do that. Condition, your colleagues to do that condition, the people you work with in business to do that and condition yourself to be that way because everything becomes very, very simple, not easy. Everything becomes, and you start getting clarity on what action steps you actually need to take each and every day.

Well, it seems I'm all out of info juice for today. That's all for this episode, and thank you so much for listening. Please leave a raving review for me if you've learned something good, and make sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode. Now, if you're in the mood for some more great content and tools to get your hormones on track,

why not check out our free Facebook group and the blog on our site? We do amazing weekly trainings in our group that me and my wife call Teen Teachings that give good tips for anything hormones and metabolism related. It's also a great community where you get to share your goals and success with like-minded people just like you. I'll make sure to drop both the Facebook group link and the blog link in the show notes for you.

Or if you're ambitious like me, the name of the group is Weight Loss and Balanced Hormones. It'll say Fit for all beside it with a picture of me. So come and join us and have more fun.