S4E10: From Patient to Purpose: Dr. Vanessa Sheppard, a Cancer Survivor, Shares Her Testimony and Her Mission to Help Others - Episode 4 of 6 of the Cancer Sucks, Jesus Saves Summer Series

Cancer Sucks, Jesus Saves is a six-part podcast series that tackles the raw reality of cancer while shining a light on unshakable hope in Christ. In today's powerful episode of Cancer Sucks, Jesus Saves, we meet a remarkable woman, Dr. Vanessa Sheppard, whose life took a dramatic turn when she went from cancer patient (twice!) to cancer researcher. As a survivor, she shares the raw and real impact that her diagnosis had on every part of her life—body, mind, and spirit. But rather than being defined by the disease, she allowed it to refine her purpose.

Now dedicated to supporting others through evidence, empathy, and faith, she opens up about how surviving cancer deepened her relationship with Jesus and ignited a mission to inform, advocate, and walk alongside others facing the same battle.

This is a story of redemption, resilience, and the healing that comes when science and faith work hand in hand.

Even when cancer changes everything, Jesus gives it meaning.

This episode honors the unseen heroes: the survivors of cancer who strive to make a difference every day.

Stay tuned for two more episodes Thursdays between August 21st - August 28th. Each episode will bring a different perspective to the conversation:

• • someone who lost her husband to cancer about 15 years ago and is living a joyful life today
  • a therapist/counselor who helps navigate the emotional and spiritual toll.

And you can also listen to previous episodes here as well!

Together, these voices remind us that while cancer is devastating, it doesn’t have the final say—Jesus does.

And as always, Annie and I would love to hear from you. Have you or a loved one been impacted by cancer or another illness? How are you coping? How can we pray for you? Please email us at mazuri@mazuriministries.org, or share your story with us on IG @davenialeawrites, or on FB @annieraney

And if you know someone who might benefit from this series, please share it with them. Your share might just be the hope they need!

Finally, your reviews mean the world to us, and they also assist us in spreading God's message of hope and victory across the globe! So please leave us a review on your favorite podcast player or on our Podcast Webpage 

🔗 Again, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review to keep the conversation going!

Today's episode song is inspired by Vanessa's story. This song, One of the One’s, was co-written by Yvonne Cummings and an AI music generation tool. The lyrics, concept, and creative direction were developed by Yvonne Cummings, with AI assisting in music composition and production. Please note this song is for your listening enjoyment only and cannot be downloaded or shared.

Thanks for listening! From our hearts to yours!!

Transcript

Annie: Welcome to the Didn't Ask to Be a Hero podcast.

I'm your host, Annie Raney. In each episode, we will get an opportunity to see how ordinary women are now living amazing, abundant, and extraordinary lives with God's help.

May their stories serve to encourage and inspire you. Let's get started.

Hello, listeners, and welcome back to our summer series.

And you know, our topic in the summer series is all about that terrible, horrible, no good, very big C word, cancer.

And, you know, normally whenever I start a podcast, I always say I start an episode. I'm so excited.

Well, I mean, I kind of am, but how do you say that when we're talking about cancer? So I'm going to change that to this time.

I think I'm more than excited. I am connected and invested in this topic, and I think, Divinia,

you are.

How you doing, Divinia?

Davenia: Hey, Annie. I'm great. How are you?

Annie: Pretty good. And I thought it would be exciting because I met this person who is going to be our guest today through you.

So I thought how great would it be if you introduced her?

Davenia: Yes, yes, my pleasure. So today we have with us Dr. Vanessa Shepherd. The Dr. Vanessa Shepherd. She is amazing.

Phenomenal. So the three of us connected at the retreat in December and had such a wonderful time, but Vanessa and I, friendship goes back years, and so I am happy to introduce to.

To you,

Dr. Shepherd. And,

you know, we're just going to dive right in and ask you to just share a bit about yourself.

Vanessa: Wow.

So we do go back a long time to Venia. I started getting emotional thinking about it and how long we've known each other and just what a blessing you have been to me.

But so. So a little bit about myself.

I am a researcher, so I do cancer research.

And I'm a mom,

wife,

friend,

generally a decent daughter,

the oldest.

And I think on most days, at least half the people I know think I'm decent and kind of like me,

you know, definitely committed to this thing we call cancer. You know, people, sometimes the big C.

And I'm actually at a point of my both career and life where I'm working for integration.

And so I've compartmentalized lots of different things. Those titles that we describe ourselves, and then it all kind of collapses or comes together.

We often try to balance. I usually say I'm dropping some ball every day,

and now I'm recommitting myself not to drop the ball of my health,

because sometimes I think that's very easy, at least for me to do, to get really focused on a good goal, in fact, or a good task,

and then may leave behind some of the basic things I need to do. So this has been my year of trying to work towards integration of this sort of the science of survivorship is what I'm calling it.

Annie: Vanessa, I want to ask, so when you started going to college, what did you study, like for your bachelor's and so then what is your doctorate in?

Vanessa: So, so, so my doctorate is in the health field.

When I went to college I was going to be a lawyer. And the things I kind of wanted to be, I see them coming together. One was a missionary because I wanted to go to other countries to help people.

You know, as when you're young, you don't realize you actually need help right down the street or even your own house sometimes. Right. So I wanted to be a missionary, archeologist and then the health field.

Right.

But then by college it was law,

I wanted to be a lawyer.

And while I was in college actually had my first health issue come up. I had Hodgkin's disease. So I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma while I was in college and that sort of spun a lot of things,

but didn't know I was having the symptoms like night sweats,

losing weight,

these things were happening. But because I'm an overextender type of person, always busy, I just felt like I was really tired.

And so that really changed the trajectory of one being able to. Then after, because I was blessed to be able to go ahead and graduate,

I would commute back and forth for treatment, but anyway,

and, and that really shifted towards health.

And then I ended up going to graduate school because I couldn't go away and go to law school.

And I actually had a relapse.

Though I did go to graduate school locally.

And that sort of started this whole other interest in how do we make healthcare better?

What's that like when you kind of go through and I was a young healthy person with a very serious life threatening disease,

doesn't quite match because people treat you differently when you're very young.

They may not see the signs of sickness.

And learning how to be an advocate, and that's back when I'm dating myself, but back when there wasn't an Internet to walk in and say I'm supposed to have this treatment.

And so my own experiences of like gaps in care follow up things that were actually missed. You know, in my experience, that's what really led me to think about do I want to do health law Health policy, do I want to do epidemiology, health services, and sort of combine all those things together.

I decided that research,

more so at that time than administration, was a way for me to impact change.

And initially, I was not going to study cancer because it was so fresh from just my own sort of long cancer journey that I had.

And this was way back when, you know, people weren't talking about cancer everywhere.

And so,

you know, even in my church, I think I was like this young person, the only other person who was young, cancer. He died when we were. When I was. When he.

When I was 14. So he was 16.

I was really mad too, at the church. I'm like, people,

they didn't pray hard enough for him.

What. Why are we accepting this? Why are we accepting this sickness?

Davenia: So how did that change for you?

So at that time,

this young boy dies at 16,

and at that time,

your belief was it's because we didn't pray enough.

So has that shifted for you? And if so,

how?

Vanessa: I would say it has shifted. But I don't think we pray enough for people to get well. I do think we accept it. I do think we pray harder that you get your money for college.

I do think we pray harder that you get your new car. I do. But also, as a community, I think we're too accepting when we see the situations get hard.

Because I had multiple relapses. I had people say crazy things to me when they visited me. I'm like, hey, don't visit me anymore. So I don't think you need to pray for me.

I mean, you know, you can bring me some food and stuff, but you keep your prayers because you need to be in alignment. Because I'm praying for healing, restoration, right?

And so I think we don't know what to say. And sometimes it may be it's a way out,

right? Or we feel. Because if we have the faithful prayer for healing, I do believe healing comes, right? And just because someone passes doesn't mean healing doesn't come, because there are all kinds of healing, right?

But I do think that when we lead in faith and we are coming before it, then we bring our all, right? Until we get an answer, an answer we may not be able to explain either on this side, right?

And so because I have experienced my own miracles and I've seen them in others, I can't say why this versus that.

And as a young person, you know,

I. Like I said, I was frustrated when he died and I never wanted cancer, and I prayed that I would never get cancer and because every time I heard about it,

you know, that person died.

So when it.

When I got the diagnosis in college,

and so again, the symptoms,

but not knowing until I think one day I went. I was feeling really weak and I went to our,

like the nurse, the campus nurse,

and my friend actually helped me with my book bag, right? Cause I'm like, this is so heavy. So I was weak and she ran some tests and whatnot and was like, okay, something's going on.

And she's like, you need to go home because of this, this and this.

And it could be sarcoidosis, it could be these different things, leukemia. So it was with my blood work. I remember crying because I didn't want to go home. I said, I was young,

I don't want to leave college.

What do you mean?

And so, you know, so I did. And so during that time, obviously, you know,

there's a lot for the prayer,

the first medical appointment. My great grandparents were there, my great aunts, my grandmother. Everybody's going, see what's going on with me.

And at some point I did go back to school. School was four hours away and I did go back and forth and I did graduate. And then by the summer I had a relapse.

And so this is sort of this breakdown with the healthcare system because I didn't have all the follow up scans I had when they diagnosed me.

But there was no way to really know, like, what's the pattern of care that you should be getting. This, you know, that wasn't really available.

And it's more accessible now because of the Internet, that people can at least get a sense of what tests I should have for diagnosis and prognosis and what should I do for follow up.

And that initial treatment, I lost some weight, but my hair didn't change,

so it wasn't as visible.

And then I had that relapse. And that's after I just met Earl, actually.

And so I'm like, I don't think we need a date because I think I'm gonna have to go through some stuff. And you know,

and he just ignores me. So that's kind of good.

And so then I had that relapse, and then I ended up having another relapse that led to a bone marrow transplant.

So in all of that, I mean, that's a lot to unpack. But the big picture, walking away with, there were people who said things like, you shouldn't have a bone marrow transplant.

And so you're getting this advice often what happens for people dealing with any kind of illness for people who may mean well,

but they haven't gone through it, they haven't lived through it. And so I'm not one just to believe something because someone says it to me,

but this issue of faith. And I did have faith and I gave testimonies of what God, I believed he was going to do for me.

And sometimes it was like, I know they said I have a recurrence, but I don't know what they're talking about because I believe I'm healed.

And so there were times I believed and professed that I was healed actually in the middle of getting news that was contrary to that,

in the middle of being very, very sick actually. And so those second and third rounds of chemo leading up to the transplant, I was very sick. Like I couldn't eat, I wouldn't eat for weeks.

I mean. And the meds they had me on,

those are my mind altering drugs. I talk about like on Ativan and Thorazine, really strong things just so I wouldn't.

So I could, you know, not be nauseous.

And so it was quite terrible actually.

And I'm like,

okay, I'm just. But I believe I'm going to be healed, you know, because from my study,

what I heard from God,

I had scriptures all around my room, right on the wall.

And that's what I believed.

For me,

I was also young and I hadn't dealt with people passing.

Right. I was blessed to have grandparents and great grandparents.

Nanam like I've lived a bit and,

and things one plus one doesn't always equal to. Like they kind of told us,

right.

It's, it's more complicated than that.

And no one can hear for you what you need to hear from God at that time. And so, you know,

I'm thankful to be here now. I do. Now I do cancer research.

I decided I was pick a cancer that I didn't have and I did that and I got that cancer.

So you know, 20 some years later,

right. And so what I can say is being that young person and going through something,

there is a,

there's a beauty for that childlike faith. It really is because we live longer, we get hurt, we get disappointed.

It doesn't all add up.

But God is faithful and it's like,

you know, sometimes he doesn't do what we know he can do and we don't know why and we get upset by it and we get mad. Well, me anyway been mad by it.

Right.

And so, and so that's that hard part of having faith in spite of it's.

We can have faith when church is booming and the music is good and I'm touching.

We can have it then. And we are celebrating.

But when you have a loss that you can't get back on this side,

that's something different, right?

That testing beyond the good times, beyond the happy ending right now.

And it's the waiting for the happy ending that will come, right? That will come.

But anyway,

this is my 10th year of treatment free. It's actually my 11th year, so 38 years since the Hodgkin's.

Annie: Okay, Vanessa, there's so much that you've said that I kind of want to unpack. I don't even know where to begin, but okay. One thing you mentioned you were, like, long ago.

It's funny because with my college students,

I now refer to it as. This is. Because this is the way they refer to it.

You were alive before Google,

so you had your first diagnosis pre Google, Right?

Vanessa: Google.

Annie: Pre Google.

Vanessa: Right?

Annie: Google's like 30, because I think Google was like 1998, something like that.

So somewhere around then. So it's like, kids are like,

you were an adult before Google. Like, they can't even imagine that. Vanessa, if you can remember,

like, especially when you're young, do you remember some other crazy things or.

Vanessa: Oh, yeah, people. People said crazy things. And so there was this woman who called me one day. I was home, and I was getting ready for the transplant. And so I'm reading booklet of all the things that are supposed to happen to you.

Your heart fails, you know, your glaucoma,

like, all this stuff. And.

And so person calls me and really had me, like, down and then questioning some things and,

you know, mixing up this sort of warp view of spirituality and stuff. My mother said, listen,

you need to go to class. Don't talk to them. She goes, she's depressed.

So you got a depressed person talking to you. You're not going to have all those things in that book,

right? And you're gonna. You're gonna go through it, and God's gonna be with you through it. You're not having all of those things.

And don't talk to her again.

And she said, so you can't let these people get in your mind. I have faith, right,

in God, and he is my healer.

And so I'm really like, do I go, do I have it or do I not? Do I have it or not? And I was back and forth about the.

And so my mother said to me, really, one of the most profound Things that stays with me is. And I said, mom, you know, what should I do? Because I trust her,

okay?

And the mother who loves me,

she's like, baby, I can't tell you.

Annie: Ooh.

Vanessa: I'm like, well, wait a minute. Now all these other church people are lined up at friends.

Exactly what I should do, right? And she says.

She said, I cannot tell you, but what I can tell you.

Don't think that by not having something that that is demonstrating faith.

And so a piece of that I've actually incorporated into some of the work that I do in the community,

and that in terms of what is faith, it's not the denial of this other thing. Sometimes I believe that we say it's faith, but it's actually fear.

And in the. As we were preparing, getting closer for the transplant,

he calls me one day, and I go to his office. He's like, I don't think you're gonna be eligible.

I'm like, hold up. Wait a minute. He's like.

And he was down. It's bad when your oncologist is down. He's like, because it looks like it's come back in your chest.

And it had come back in my chest before. That's when I'd had that recurrence.

And he said,

so I don't think that we're gonna be able to.

I don't think we're gonna be able to do it.

And so I left there,

went to my grandmother's house, and cried, because now the thing that people were saying, you don't need. You shouldn't do that if you have faith.

The thing I was ambivalent about, now it looks like I'm ineligible for. By the time I got home,

he called me, my oncologist called, and he said, you know, I'm going to believe that that is scar tissue,

and we're going to move forward.

So I'm like, thank you, Lord.

I got my answer.

We're going to. We're doing this. And so, you know, the crazy things people say can really influence you if you're not seeking to hear from God.

Because sometimes what people are saying taps into your fear.

It taps into these other areas that have actually nothing to do with where God is leading you.

And so. So I'm very careful about even what I tell people, because I don't feel comfortable telling people what to do. I can just say,

you can live through it.

Annie: Wait, I want to ask you another question.

You've been through cancer and relapses, and then apparently a different kind of Cancer.

And to anybody who doesn't know your story, they see you and you look great.

What I want to know, and this is kind of personal, so share as much as you'd like or not like to share.

Even though you look great to the outside world,

you know, like you said, you've gone through so many, so much chemo and treatment. Is your body like it was when you were 21, pre diagnosis and is,

are there any residual pains or any other kind of effects that are lasting?

Vanessa: So. So the funny thing for me is as I describe the things that I've kind of lived through or experienced,

it doesn't always resonate because in my mind, I really do think I'm 30 something.

What I will say is I think it helps to be healthy.

What I can speak to is being a college age person going through cancer treatment versus being a grownup. It was very different.

I felt fatigue differently.

And so I remember in 2014, 2015,

undergoing treatment and like not being able to walk around the block.

And so the thoughts were different there because now by this time I'm a mom,

so I'm like,

I don't want to leave my kids momless. So all of that was very different than when I was young and the whole world is ahead of you. What also changes is none of us are going to live forever, but it's a different sense of life when you're really young and it one plus one equals two,

right. Versus now in terms of the body part.

This last time, I have some alphalgia right in my fingers and toes.

And so during the treatment in 2015, I did lose the touch of my fingers. And so I did break the mashed potatoes at Christmas because I'm like, I don't know why you keep giving me stuff to hold.

You know, I'm butter fingers right now. So there we go.

So that was, that was different,

you know, so cancer or experiencing cancer can accelerate aging in general.

Right.

In anybody.

And so then to be vigilant on the other side.

Right now I'm working out again,

so.

And so things are more important now than they were like sleep. And Dee knows I struggle with that, but I can see now if I don't sleep and the way I used to like, run, run, run, run, run.

I'm wearing my, I'm wearing my body down. So I'm more conscious of that now.

So after my experience,

you mentioned, Annie, that things change you and you, you can become lighter, darker,

braver,

nicer,

but part of it is like not having people waste your Time. Right. And also being more comfortable in like what you have survived.

And so.

And God has been faithful and gracious and patient to me when I'm not all that patient and gracious to myself.

And so I have been blessed. I'm not 100% in control because they can't explain why me with Hodgkin's and not someone else. I didn't meet the profile for it. You know, why me versus someone else.

Davenia: And you mentioned how your, your faith can support healing.

Do you have opportunities to share that with either those that are part of your research or those that you speak to?

Vanessa: Yeah. So I would say not as much on a daily basis at work. Only recently have I started to blend the fact that,

you know, I'm this long term survivor with work that for a while I didn't want people to think that because I was a survivor, that somehow I wasn't a scientist and I wasn't coming from it from an objective perspective,

particularly since a lot of my populations I focus on are women and women of color. Right. So I tried to separate it, you know, as if people couldn't see what I look like.

But that's another story.

I think now I'm working more towards integration. We did develop something.

It's, it's this toolkit we developed is sisters informing sisters. And so we still are funded actually by the American Cancer Society where we are doing sort of coaching to newly diagnosed women so that they can be informed and have what they need to make informed decisions with.

Everything with,

you know, is it chemo, is it endocrine therapy, is it a clinical trial for themselves?

And the next step is really how they can talk to their family members as well. Because I still see in some instances where family members aren't that supportive and integrated in that is about faith and discussions.

Because for many women of color it is important and that spiritual health and spiritual care is. And so in that particular study and in those tools, that's where we've integrated sort of faith and that's where I kind of get to do that.

So when I show up in the community,

I've been saying, okay, I'm not here today. Sometimes I'm here for my institution, but sometimes I'm just here for me. These are my comments.

And I don't see a conflict between science and faith.

To me they go together. Right.

And I, I've never felt a conflict between the two.

Davenia: What do you wish the church understood better about cancer and those battling it?

Vanessa: So I think we have to be careful not to blame the victim. Some churches like to have a cause and effect for everything.

If we can, then that would almost make us like we're God and we're not. But I think we forget it.

And so we want to say it's because your diet. We know that's. I mean, diet contributes, lifestyle contributes, but it's not that simple, right?

It's not because a person ate a piece of candy or sugar.

And so what I have seen, sometimes for people that are educated, even sometimes in church communities,

they have wrongfully cited things that cause cancer that don't. Okay?

Stay away from giving advice unless you happen to be an expert.

Be quiet.

Right?

Don't tell people what you would do unless you've done it, because you don't know what you would do.

You don't know.

You don't know.

And things are very complex. People make decisions sometimes based on their transportation, based on their children, based on their spouse.

It's,

you know, we are thinking emotional,

sometimes rational,

whatever beings. And things can get really clouded for people enough so they don't need extra noise.

I think that spaces for people who have survived and lived through serious conditions, spaces for them to gather. And quite honestly, sometimes I don't want to stand up, okay? You just.

It's like, oh, that's why I would stand up. I don't want that. Maybe. I don't. Maybe in this room of people, and I don't know, you guys, I don't want to do that right now.

So I think that just because when people have gone through anything in life, that that doesn't mean I'm going to disclose it all the time, because sometimes I'm showing up just as my cute self.

Sometimes I'm only showing up as a mom or whatever. And so I get to decide where I want to be today and give people that space for that.

I think we need to arm ourselves with more information so that we can be supportive.

We can get rid of some of the myths about certain things.

And sometimes we have to be okay with people sharing how they want to share.

And at the end of the day, I think we can be helpful by praying for people.

I think we can be helpful by bringing them some food to eat.

I think we don't have to know every single thing to be helpful.

Annie: Wow.

Davenia: And I like how you said about. It's sort of like the labels. It's like sometimes whatever you have gone through, then that becomes your identity.

And so that's. People only see you as you're the cancer survivor. You're the this, you're the that.

And I like how you said allowing the person to sort of dictate how you, you're wanting to show up at that time because that's a part of your identity, but it's not your entire identity.

Vanessa: And I'm changing day to day. Right. I, I changed. I was very private.

Ish. Right.

Because I had young children and I chose for right or wrong to not engage them and tell them.

And some people thought it was the worst thing ever. I didn't necessarily want that because my split between scientists and now going through this, that was a little too close to home right now.

Right. Because I'm now studying something than that I'm having. And I know statistics and I know this. So I did even with my mom and my husband for a minute.

I did appointments and things without them.

And then once I digested it, once I went through it, then I'm like, okay, here's what I think you need to know.

I just needed control.

So. Yeah.

Annie: So, Vanessa, let me ask you,

let's picture this scenario. You are the guest speaker in a large auditorium. And in this case.

So I'm going to present you with the scenario.

You have a group of faith based researchers. Cancer. They're researching different types of cancer and cures and treatments and things like that.

And what would you say if I said sum up in 30 seconds? The biggest piece of advice you'd want to give this group of cancer? Faith based cancer researchers.

Vanessa: Spiritual health matters and spiritual care matters.

Annie: Oh, my goodness, I love that. That's 10 seconds. And that is like so deep. We could do a whole episode just on that. Okay, so now I'm gonna change the scenario a little bit.

And same thing, you're in the auditorium, except this time the auditorium is filled with cancer survivors.

Okay, same thing. 30 seconds. What would be the main message you would want to give to them?

Vanessa: You survive for a reason. You're here. Take care of yourself so you can keep being here.

Annie: I love it.

Vanessa: I love it.

Davenia: Wow,

thank you so much.

Well, Vanessa, we have to wrap up.

And so in closing, two more questions.

One,

was there a particular Bible text or passage of scripture or Bible character that motivated you during either time of treatment or that serves to motivate you now post.

Vanessa: So I would say the woman that just kept bugging Jesus,

you know,

that didn't take no for an answer, did that for me. In terms of the asking and being okay with the asking and continuing through, you know, I'll take the crumbs, right?

Davenia: And how about A song?

Vanessa: Oh, just name one. I mean, so, you know,

so songs for me,

music has always been key through the whole journey. Right.

I could send you a playlist of from,

you know, Walter Hawkins. This song, full and complete.

You don't hear it much, but words of that just ministered.

Annie: Wow. Vanessa, we want to thank you so much for being our guest today.

And indeed, we could keep talking to you forever.

And listeners, I hope you've enjoyed our conversation with Vanessa as much as we have today.

And you know, Romans 12:12 really touches upon many of the things that Vanessa said.

Rejoicing in hope, patience and tribulation.

Continuing steadfastly in prayer, because prayer is what gets you through it. Are praying enough?

How are we praying?

Vanessa: Just.

Annie: Just consider that. But continuing steadfastly in prayer.

And then Hebrews 10:36 to 37. Anybody out there fighting cancer right now or living with it or maybe post cancer treatment,

for you have need of endurance so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise for yet a little while.

And he who is coming will come and.

And will not tarry, my friends. Healing may come today,

it may come tomorrow, or it may come when Jesus comes.

Just remember,

if you are a survivor, as Vanessa said,

you're here for a reason.

So keep on living and thriving.

And so, listeners,

from Divinia in my heart to yours,

this song's for you.

Vanessa: Hi, I'm Dr. Vanessa Shepherd. And I'm Yvonne Cummings.

We're so excited to share a song that is special to me,

this song is truly a testimony.

It's written by Yvonne Cummings.

The name of the song is one of the ones.

And my inspiration for writing this song was knowing the testimony of Dr. Vanessa shepherd and her journey to wellness.

Yvonne, when I heard this song, it brought me to tears.

I play it every day.

It captures so much of the experience,

and I hope that our listeners today will enjoy it.

Thank you