Yahweh’s Money®️: The Crossroads of Religion & Money

Breaking Bread: Women as Primary Earners

• Shay Cook & Vanessa McNelley • Season 3 • Episode 62

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Can you imagine a world where nearly half of all households have women as primary earners? Today, we explore the transformative impact of women, especially women of color, stepping into the role of breadwinners. Join Vanessa and Shay as they discuss the role of education in empowering women to achieve career success and challenge traditional stereotypes. Through personal anecdotes and cultural references, such as the hit show "House of Dragon," we illustrate how women are redefining family dynamics and leadership roles, all while managing their faith and family life.

We'll also examine the evolving dynamics of household responsibilities in families where women are the primary earners. The discussion highlights the importance of sharing domestic duties equitably and the challenges women face in recognizing when to ask for help. We touch on changing family structures, including same-sex couples, single adults, and DINK households, and how societal shifts, such as economic pressures, are leading more adults to live at home longer. This segment underscores the complex landscape of modern family life and the necessity of open communication between partners to maintain a balanced household.

Finally, we explore the intersection of culinary traditions and family dynamics, sharing personal experiences about how a partner's passion for cooking can influence household roles. We discuss the importance of defining roles within relationships, the impact of religious beliefs on gender expectations, and the crucial need for self-care for women juggling multiple responsibilities. This episode offers a comprehensive look at the evolving roles of women in both professional and personal spheres, emphasizing the ongoing journey towards greater gender equality in financial stewardship and household management.

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Shay:

Ever felt those awkward vibes when religion and money come up? You're not alone. Welcome to Yahweh's Money, the podcast where we tackle the crossroads of faith and finance. I'm Shay Cook, an Accredited Financial Counselor and the CEO and founder of Crusaders for Change LLC.

Vanessa:

And I'm Vanessa McNelley, Accredited Financial Counselor and COO of Crusaders for Change. Join us on our journey as we discuss topics like tithing saving and conquering debt through religious perspectives. Let's get started.

Shay:

Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Yahweh's Money. Hey, Vanessa, how are you today? I am good. How are you, Shay? I'm excited to talk about women as the breadwinner. Oh my God, this is a hot, steamy, sexy topic that nobody wants to talk about?

Vanessa:

I know Yep.

Shay:

So we're going to get into it, because today, Vanessa, I will be talking about something that has been shattering traditional stereotypes and refining the modern family dynamic for years. Yep, that's right Women as breadwinners. In fact, nearly which is crazy, this amount, 40% of households in the US now have women as bread, as the primary earners, and I have to add that the numbers are slightly higher for people of color. Women of color. I know I've talked to many Black and brown women and they're like oh that's like 70%.

Shay:

I'm like, yeah, I don't know what the real number is. I think I've seen 60, but it's pretty high. So talk about change, from balancing budgets to breaking barriers. We explore more how modern women are leading the way in financial stewardship, all while navigating their faith and family life. So we love a Proverbs woman here at Yahweh's money. In fact, proverbs 31, 13 to 14 says or tells us she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships bringing her food from afar. This passage describes the Proverbs woman as someone who not only provides her for her household, it also shows her involvement in financial decision making and her entrepreneur spirit. Oh my God, that's a mouthful.

Vanessa:

It's a lot. It sounds exhausting actually.

Shay:

Yeah, that part.

Vanessa:

Yeah, it really does. It sounds like we have to be everything to everyone, and I know we've talked about that before too, but what do you think brought about this change for women to become breadwinners?

Shay:

That's a great question, I know. When I started reading this script and preparing I thought of House of Dragon with the two women One is taking care of her son, who's the king, and on the other side, for those who watch House of Dragon, the two women like one is taking care of her son, who's the king, and on the other side for those who watch House of Dragon, who watch Game of Thrones, and you have this king queen trying to become, excuse me, the queen of all the lands or whatever. I'm sure I'm messing up the reference, but even now in TV and on in movies, women are just more at the forefront. In movies, women are just more at the forefront. So I don't know, it's wild. I mean, I've always been side by side with my husband. I wouldn't say I've necessarily been the breadwinner in my household, but I know a lot of family friends, including single mothers, including my husband's mother, have been and it's a change. That tide has been rising for a long time and I don't know if it's ever going to go back down.

Vanessa:

I agree. I know in my household I've been the breadwinner before and I think it does. It brings about this weird dynamic too, because I think a lot of men feel threatened when that happens. Some don't, which is wonderful, but it does. It brings about this. A lot of people don't know how to handle the change, I think, when it comes down to it. But I think one reason for this is women are able to get more education these days than they were in the past, so I think that's a huge thing. I know my grandmother. My grandmother had to quit school in the third grade because she had to stay at home and help raise the other children.

Vanessa:

And if you think back from her generation to us now and the ability to finish high school, to go to college to get a master's degree, to go get a doctorate degree, that has really changed in such a short period of time it really has so many women.

Shay:

I know they have multiple degrees, multiple certifications and you even meet the women that are at home and not breadwinners to have education right. So it's definitely attainable, more attainable than it's ever been before, especially with online and just all the flexibility that universities and colleges offer. So yay to women that are getting all the education. I would say sometimes women get too much education because then they're they, they are, they have too much and now they can't get. I've seen women that can't get a job because they just have too much on their resume.

Vanessa:

Yeah, exactly, exactly. Especially when you have that and let's say you stay at home with your kids for a little bit, so you don't have that work experience or relevant or timely work experience, but you have all the education, you kind of get yourself in this place where you're not really in a space to be hired and it's really, really hard.

Vanessa:

So I guess finding that balance is what we all want to do. Yeah, and we do have an increase of women who are actually participating in a part of the workforce, and that's something we didn't have in the past. A lot of women stayed at home, raised a family. That's what we were kind of taught to do back in that day. I have cause I have two grandmothers, so my dad's mom was very upset with me when I told her I wanted to go to college, because she thought a woman's place was in the home and your job was to raise your family, cook for your husband, clean your house. And I think it went back to that's what she had wanted for herself. But she was a single mom of three, so she never got that.

Shay:

Yeah, and that's true.

Shay:

I know I see women here in my family that they still have those traditional roles and then, on top of the traditional roles, if they get a job, they still hold on to those traditional roles, which I know we've talked about a lot, and all the invisible work that's still involved in there and the inequality between the man and a woman when it comes to the shared roles, and that's another episode.

Shay:

But being the breadwinner, to be honest, vanessa, I don't know, I don't have many women in my side of the family that were breadwinners. Most of them were that traditional role taking care of the child at home, taking care of children and taking care of the household. The man went out and got the bacon, brought the bacon home, as they would say, or they got jobs, like I said, and they still maintain the household. I think more on my husband's side, because his mom was a single mother and a lot of his aunts they are single or whatever the situation may be, they were. So I guess it's all dependent on an era, the culture where you're from, like many different factors.

Vanessa:

Oh yeah, totally yeah. I know my mom worked more than my father worked, so she was gone out of the house working from gosh early morning to late at night most days, and my dad would go in three or four maybe on a good day and he would stay until 11 or 12 if he felt like it. So it was a very different dynamic in our household, even though they owned businesses. So essentially they made the same amount. But I know my mom worked a lot harder with things, yeah, and we've had a lot of advancements too in gender equality, and I will say we are not there yet.

Shay:

We are a long way from, because women still are in the majority, like administrative roles and stuff like that. They're not in the roles of leadership. You know all that kind of stuff, yeah, they're not in the roles of leadership. You know all that kind of stuff, yeah.

Vanessa:

Well, there's still a pay gap. I think there's a 16% pay gap still between men and women doing the same job. And then if you think about gender equality through the ages, just when women gain the right to vote, not every woman gained the right to vote at the same time, exactly. So it's been since the sixties, and that's not really that long since women have been a part of this yeah.

Vanessa:

Yeah, and then you know, there's just there's changing social norms and gender roles and I don't know about you, but I still have this desire within me to be a woman, do things around the house for my partner, like I enjoy cooking dinner for them, I enjoy cleaning the house. It makes me feel like I'm contributing in this way that I don't know. It's hard to explain. I think it's just something that's built into me and I know most people don't have that. But what about you? How do you feel with?

Shay:

all that. I just love the clean. I don't think, as you know, I'm OCD, I'm a clean freak. I just love a clean house. So my family benefits from that. My growing up, my family, my brother and sister, mom and dad benefited from that. So I don't even know if that's just DNA or whatever. So that's always been there, Like my house. Everybody knows my house is going to be clean, Okay so.

Shay:

But when it comes to cooking, I just recently fell in love with cooking because it was a health choice. It was like, with my family starting with me, it's going to be healthy, I need to cook. And then, of course, came with that was I'm saving money. So y'all should definitely try that out, you money, I mean. Now, when I go in the refrigerator, I'm like man, maybe I should order something like no, I'm going to eat these leftovers and then leftovers be good. So I, you know. So that's what I do.

Shay:

But yeah, I know a lot of people the same way that just feel like I got to run my house, I got to take care of it. It's like but you're also working, so you're exhausted, right, when you're at the end of the day too, and all of that. So there has to be some partnering there when it comes to especially women as breadwinners. We need to have a conversation with our partners, with our children. You might have some other generational family members living in the house. We need to have a conversation. If I'm going to be making the majority of your money like somebody, there needs to be some equality there in the roles that we play at home.

Vanessa:

Somebody. There needs to be some equality there in the roles that we play at home. Agree, yeah, I know back in the day my ex-husband would not help me with anything in the home and he was raised in a household where his mother worked, so I never really understood it. But at one point I had to say to him either you help me with these things around the house because I was working full time.

Vanessa:

I was a full-time grad student. I had a side hustle and I was working full-time. I was a full-time grad student. I had a side hustle and I was still expected to keep the house up and to cook and to do the grocery shopping. So I finally had to say either you help me or you pay for someone to help me because, I couldn't do it anymore.

Vanessa:

I could not do it and I'm so thankful now to have a partner that says wait a minute, you know, I was single before you and I could do these things before you. And he recognizes that I do these things and he recognizes that sometimes I go a little above and beyond I think sometimes, but it's just something that's built within me and he tells me it's okay, you're not there anymore, you have help, and that's a really good feeling too.

Shay:

That's beautiful. Yeah, my situation is a little different. It's all Shay's issues. My husband be like I ain't tell you to do all of that, and he's right. He's been telling me that for 25 years. Like, hey, my husband for the, oh my God. So I started getting somebody to clean my house, like a couple of years ago, and like, was it right before? It was like during, right at the end of the pandemic, and so I literally had to get coaching to get to that point, cause my husband had been telling me 20 years prior to hire somebody. So I have to give it up to my husband, it ain't that way, it ain't him, it's me, cause he's like well, get some help, hire somebody.

Shay:

I'm like, no, I can do all of this right so and then he's like I ain't tell you to wash my clothes and I'm like you know what?

Vanessa:

you wouldn't have no underwear if I wash your clothes maybe that'd be a good lesson, though, a really good lesson.

Shay:

I might as well just go buy more underwear he's one of those.

Shay:

But, um, yeah, I mean I have to say I know there's women, that men at our home that are just like nah, you need to do this, they have that expectation. My husband doesn't have that expectation. I said that within myself, so I think that also needs to be honored too, that some women just do it because they they do it too much, they just doing too much, and they need to sit down and look at themselves and don't be blaming their man or their woman or whoever their partner, without like well, they expect me, no, you expect it yourself. So, anyways, I'm talking to myself right now but you know so, but you're so right, you're so so right.

Vanessa:

A lot of times it's just we think that that's what we're supposed to do, or it won't get done unless we do it. And you can't do everything and you can't do everything.

Vanessa:

Well, that's the other part of that.

Vanessa:

So we have to make choices and pick and choose, and that's something women as a whole are not good at. We want to have it all and do it all, but you know we have to, like you said, honor those things and step back and say we need help when we need help, and others on the other side of that, our partners, need to realize that they need to see it and they need to not wait until we ask for it, because if we ask for help. We are beyond the point of needing it.

Shay:

That's so true.

Vanessa:

Yeah, and then we also have all these changing family dynamics. That's another thing. We have a lot of, you know, same-sex couples. We have a lot of single adults who are choosing to not get married, not have kids. We have a lot of, you know, dinks so dual income, no kids. There's a lot of things going on that didn't happen 50 years ago openly anyway, with a lot of that. But we have lots of changing family dynamics that really impact the way we work, who works and who takes care of the household.

Shay:

Yeah, that's so true.

Vanessa:

First of all, I've never heard of dinks before, so that's something I've learned today.

Shay:

So that's cool. But yeah, you're right, it's a different world. It's a different world and I mean we probably can go, so it ain't no problem. We can go deeper, and not only women as the breadwinners, but more single people, like you said, having to support themselves or living at home, which I'm hearing about, the news of a lot of people not leaving until they're 30, 35, 40 now because of the economy and so how that affects you know. So there's a lot of different dynamics there. But yeah, it's a totally it's a different world or maybe, like you said, it's the same world we just now. We know about it because social and internet and all that.

Vanessa:

Yeah.

Shay:

It's always been like this.

Vanessa:

Exactly.

Shay:

So what about the social impact women as breadwinners has bought? So you know, like we kind of already mentioned the redefinition of gender roles, women are accepted more as breadwinners and many men help with domestic duties now, which I love, like there's no shame at being a stay-at-home father, or you know, cooking and cleaning and you know, oh. So I just had this thought, like my husband, my mind, even though I do a lot and I do the most, our household has been very different because my husband, for the first long time he did most of the cooking and I I used to mow the grass and.

Shay:

I used to, and you know, and we were sharing cleaning and some, you know, but he was, you know, but he did a lot of the cooking, which I know a lot of men do a lot of the cooking. But growing up men didn't do the cooking, in my, in my side of family at least, yeah, and so having that, you know, people will look at I or it might have just been me but people were looking at us like, yeah, that's different, y'all ain't traditional. And I used to have to tell people, no, we ain't. No, my husband liked to cook for a long time there. He wanted to be. Uh, he went to culinary school for a little bit and all that I didn't know that.

Vanessa:

Yeah, it didn't pan out the money situation.

Shay:

So he went to college in the military. That's a long story, yeah, so uh. But then we came, when he got out of the military, he looked at culinary school again, and that's another story too. But yeah, he always loved to cook and so I was really spoiled. I mean I gained like 20, I gained 20 pounds the first year we were dating because he cooks so much, oh, wow.

Vanessa:

That's. But you know that is a rarity and I think a lot of men don't spend time in the kitchens like we did growing up, I think a lot of women spent time in the kitchen with their you know, their grandmas, their aunties, their moms, all those things growing up.

Vanessa:

And I didn't have that either. I didn't. I wasn't. I didn't grow up in a traditional kitchen, I guess. But my grandfather was a mess sergeant in the military, so he was really good at cooking, and my grandmother, his wife, not so much, but at home she really took care of him and provided with food and everything on the table, even though it was just reheating things. So but yeah, I didn't grow up with a lot of women cooking either and kind of showing me how to do those things, so I had to learn those on my own. But that's a very, very good way to kind of talk about it.

Vanessa:

I think a lot of men do enjoy cooking and do enjoy the creation part and the creativity and being able to build something that you can really enjoy the science of it all.

Shay:

Right, Cooking ain't nothing but science, so you know, yeah, and then our daughter learned a lot of cooking and baking from him, not me. So my mom did all the cooking growing up. But, and I remember when I moved to Germany and we got married, she provided me a little uh binder of recipes and then she had, and so my mom makes like the best, like like Thanksgiving dishes, like macaroni cheese and sweet potatoes, and her potato salad is a diet for like we should be selling it like for real, for real. So we've all tried to, like you know, copy that. So my mom is supposed to cook and she, she just fell off a little bit because she older. But, like you know, copy that.

Shay:

So my mom is supposed to cook and she, she just fell off a little bit because she older. But she, you know, she was the one, but those recipes were passed down from her mother, my aunt, you know my great aunt, julia, so like, and who could cook her butt off? Mom julia, oh god girl, she could cook, she was amazing so yeah, so you know those kind of things.

Shay:

But you know all of this impacts the family dynamics and can be good or bad. Right, you have to have to clearly define your roles in the relationship and that's what I said, like for my husband and I come in and it was like, hey, if you love to cook, you go in and cook, I clean. That's and that's what we did for many for decades, you know, until this year when I started really cooking and I always cooked here and there. I mean, we had a child so I had to cook, had to take care of her, but, yeah, he was like the main cook. But having those conversations are very important.

Vanessa:

So important? Yeah, because if you can actually sit down with your partner, number one it opens the lines of communication and you can talk about your feelings If you're feeling overwhelmed or you're feeling like you need help, or if there's something that you really don't like doing and they don't mind it. You guys can have those conversations and kind of split things up so you're not working all day, then coming home and having to cook and clean and help the kids with homework and all those things that really get you overwhelmed and then you have zero time for yourself, zero time to like recoup and recover.

Vanessa:

But yeah, I think having the conversations that is so, so important.

Shay:

And all of this is very empowering to women, I think sometimes a little too empowering, because women think they the issue you know and they'd be like, and then they want to talk bad about men. It's like we don't need y'all. And that's where my husband would be like women are making all this money now and they think they you know all that. And they are, and they always have been. But, you still got to have that respect for the other side, right Exactly.

Vanessa:

You can't downplay the importance of their role as well. Exactly.

Shay:

And then we're role models. Kids look up to both the both parents for balancing work and family. You know, and I know I've been for my daughter. You know, even though now she's like you work too hard, and I know Vanessa don't say nothing, she's like you need to rest, but you know. So what kind of role model are you as a breadwinner, a woman? As a breadwinner, you're a role model and your kids like oh, I want to be like my mama and all that, but then, like my daughter, be like I don't want to work that hard.

Vanessa:

So you know that's how I felt too growing up.

Vanessa:

Oh, wow yeah.

Vanessa:

Yeah, I remember my mom would come home and she would just be completely exhausted and then the expectation was to help us with our homework and dinner on the table or whatever it might be. And I was like I don't want this one day. I don't want to be so tired that I, you know, I can't function.

Shay:

Yeah.

Vanessa:

And I was like I will never have my own business because of that, Because that's what I equated that with.

Shay:

That's probably what my daughter felt like so hard.

Vanessa:

Yeah, yeah, that's probably what my daughter felt like so hard, yeah, yeah, and it's like I don't. I never understood that, that she didn't take time for the family or for herself, or which I know she was doing it for us, obviously. But you have to be able to to kind of say, okay, I'm doing this, you do that, and it's okay to get your kids involved in that too. Kids can do things at home. Kids can do things at home. Kids can do things at work. I know my mom taught me how to run payroll when I was 10. I love that. So yeah, because she didn't trust my dad to do it when she was out of town.

Vanessa:

So it's like she had her 10 year old child, you know, running payroll, but at the same time she passed these bad traits down to me, showing me that you know women have to clean, they have to cook, they have to, you know, help the kids with the homework and work 12 times harder too. And it's okay to let you know your partner slack, and it's not okay. It's okay to have an equal environment and do things at home too. Absolutely.

Shay:

And then, what about all the great policy and work changes that have come out of this right Flex work, parental leave, like life, work balance, which I would say a lot of us are working on, that I know seeing in the Olympics that just passed recently um, of course I'm going to forget her name a very amazing track star who's won, like I think, the most medals for America. She implemented a uh child like that daycare board yeah, like a daycare or nursery, excuse me. And the Olympic village, like the first one ever, which was like really, how many women Olympians have been in Olympics for hundreds of years? And children, so for her to do that, it's like, all right, women are on top and they're like, nah, we need, we demand to have breastfeeding centers and leave, and you know what? How about the man maternal leave? You know that's huge too. Like on the flip side, like it's not just about the woman, about the man in the relationship too. I agree.

Vanessa:

I have always thought that paternity leave was so important because you bond with that baby and you spend time with your you know, with your little one and your spouse or your partner, and when you're recovering from that as a woman, you need help with just that side of things too. It's not just about the kid, and I think we forget about those things that your body's changed and who knows if you had a C-section or not. It takes time. I've had friends in the past spouses were military and husbands didn't get to come home for the birth of a child. Wife had a C-section. How are you expected to take care of a newborn when you're not supposed to lift Exactly?

Vanessa:

It doesn't make any sense at all at all at all.

Vanessa:

Or even if an adoption occurs, you know you need time to bond with that child, both parents. So there's not this inequality from the beginning, Exactly.

Shay:

So do religious beliefs have an impact.

Vanessa:

I mean, I really think they do. I don't know about you, but I feel like the way you're brought up, a lot of those social roles are kind of built into your religious beliefs. I don't know about you, but I feel like women as a whole just still have that sense of honoring, taking care of, being a little more submissive to their spouses, and I think that is in a lot of religious perspectives. But you know, there's a lot more that goes in with that too. What about giving you charity? You know it's. It's crazy to me that working women give more to charity than men do.

Shay:

How do you feel about that? They volunteer more too. Yeah, it's just, I don't know. Something's wrong with us. This must be a DNA issue.

Vanessa:

We try to take care of everyone. We try to take care of everyone but ourselves.

Shay:

Most of the time, we are always doing the most, working too much, and I struggle with that.

Shay:

You know, I was talking to my husband yesterday about that. You know, after the conversation we had with our coach, I was saying like I've just always been like this. And he's like, no, you ain't, because if you had always been like this I wouldn't have been with you. I was like, okay, thank you for the honesty. Yeah, but he's right. I mean, there's it ebb and flows where I feel like I need to do a lot, I need to do the most, and then sometimes I'd be like, nah, I can't do that, I need to chill, I need to spend more time with is something, something that's ingrained in me as a woman that wants to do, or just maybe I don't know.

Shay:

I don't know if it's all, it's not all women, obviously that just always wants to do the most, always wants to volunteer like serve and serve, and serve, and I can't serve and not take care of myself. Exactly.

Vanessa:

Exactly, and I think too, like there's this inner longing for peace, and you know we want everybody to to thrive, and I don't think a lot of men have that.

Vanessa:

And it's like we want to see change and we want a better world for children, we want a better world for ourselves, and I think we see a lot of that, more so than men. I think men are more practical a lot of times and we kind of dream these things and want and hope versus the realities of things, and I think men are able to just say no or I don't have time, and we're like well, you know what, if it's important, I'll make time. Exactly, yeah.

Shay:

You know many religions emphasize distinct gender roles which can hold women back. I know there are still especially that I know of in a black church that men and I know it's not only black churches that men don't want women in a pulpit, you know they don't want, they don't even and they don't even sharing that you know, with their pastors and reverends or whatever religious figure you know, because they still like wait a minute, you make more money and you're a man. That's not right. You know that kind of stigma, that's ridiculous.

Vanessa:

I agree a hundred percent. I know like when I was in college cause I went to a Christian university and the church that I was going to and I've been my entire life I've been going to this church they took a vote to see if they would even look at resumes of women when they were hiring a music minister and they voted no, that they would not look at.

Vanessa:

Yep, and it was. You know. To me it was a more progressive church in the town that I was in, but my mom and I made an active decision that that was not something we wanted to be part of.

Shay:

Yeah.

Vanessa:

Because I knew so many girls who were going to school and training to be part of that community and it really bothered me that my own church would not even look at their resume because of their gender. That's great, and you know, I do know a lot of churches. They expect to get a two for one a pastor and a spouse, and they expect the spouse to run all the volunteer programs and do all those things. But it's like when your time is not valued enough to be paid for but you're doing it for free. There's a problem there.

Shay:

There is a problem.

Vanessa:

There is a big, big problem and I don't know how to fix that and I guess there's no way to really fix it. You just have to decide are you going to be a part of that community or not?

Vanessa:

no-transcript sometimes religious interpretations can be very unclear. So we take those words and we twist things a bit. So you know, we say, okay, well, it's important for a woman to run a whole or the home or the household, while others think it's important for women to be out there and be leaders and to be seen and heard. So I think it's all how we read it and we interpret it and what versions of the Bible that we're reading as well, or whatever doctrine you follow. But I think interpretation is a huge thing and we can either keep it the old way, based off of those interpretations, or you can be more progressive and move forward, very true.

Shay:

And then interpretations obviously it's just the filter that you're looking through with all your life experience and all your yeah, and just be your perception, which is your reality, and then it becomes other people's realities and we're all out here living and based off somebody's perception. So, yeah, it's definitely those interpretations are, are, can be very important and, yeah, very strong. And oh, I don't even know how to put it. I just know that a lot of people read the word and they try. And what used to really annoy me let me back this up is that people would take one scripture and run with it. But if you read that whole section, that whole book, that whole chapter, they're really taking it out of context. And so me reading the Bible from back to front to back and really like wait a minute, people used to say this about this and it's like no, there's a pre, during and after story that all aligns with that. You're totally taken out of contact.

Shay:

So and that's yeah, it's crazy.

Vanessa:

Exactly.

Shay:

Well, that was a great episode. Any final thoughts?

Vanessa:

You know, I just say whatever you decide to do as a female or a male, it's up to you and your partner, and whatever works for your household, do it, do it, do it, do it, but have conversations, talk about it and know that you can't do everything and you shouldn't have to do everything.

Shay:

Amen, amen. I agree with you, Vanessa. I mean, I'm making it 25 years without God and, obviously, nate and I going through all the good and bad, uh, but a lot of it was talking about what works for us, like, and not caring what the outside thought about it. So if I made a little bit more money for a little bit and then he did, you know, it was okay, like you know. Or if I'm taking care of this and he's taking care of this, I'm doing this. Whatever it may be, it works for us and so I don't care what none of y'all haters out there think about it. It's about what God and my husband husband and I uh wanted and that's how we got through all this in this time. So, yeah, thank you for joining us. Have a good day. A big thank you for listening to this episode. We hope you found today's chat about the intersection of religion and money insightful. We would love to hear your feedback. Hit that subscribe button or follow the podcast and please feel free to leave us a review.

Vanessa:

Yes, and for the latest Yahweh's Money content, visit us at www. crusaders4change. org or find us anywhere you listen to podcasts. Until next time, stay financially fit and spiritually inspired.

Shay:

And remember it's always better Yahweh's way.

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Shay Cook

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