When I was a child: Exploring the connection between our past and current selves.

 In our latest episode we delve into the question Jesus asked in Mark 9, and how it echoes in the chambers of our own childhood experiences.

•  What is Trauma?                                                                                                                                               Trauma is a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.  An emotional response to a terrible event like an accident, rape, abuse, or natural disaster.     
• How to cope with Trauma                                                                                                               Talk to a few trusted people, open up about your struggle, seek online support groups, read self-help books or practice small acts of self-care such as meditation, breathwork, yoga and exercise can help you regain some feeling of control.”
• Find a therapist                                                                                                                                               Get Started (betterhelp.com)
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• Triumph Over Trauma Scripture:  II Corinthians 2:14 Now thanks be unto to God, who always causes us to Triumph in Christ....   
• Books I'm reading on my healing journey

It Didn't Start with You! - How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes who we are, & how to end the cycle.  https://a.co/d/f22BoLk

Home Coming- Thema Bryant   
https://www.amazon.com/dp/059341831X/ref=cm_sw_r_em_api_i_TE4YHJQ63FA21362FP79

The Body Keeps the Score -  https://www.amazon.com/dp/0143127748/ref=cm_sw_r_em_api_i_HXH4RMNC329DT7VPQ5WG
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2 Corinthians 2:14 Now thanks be unto God, who always causes us to Triumph!

Transcript

Speaker 1 0:00

What's up guys , welcome back to Triumph Over Trauma .

Speaker 1 0:03

As you can tell from the day's episode when I was a child is the title . Listen I was reading the Bible the other day and this particular scripture stood out to me . It literally jumped out to me in such a way it was kind of revelatory . I had heard this particular story before but for some reason , as I was taking my time , it took on a different meaning as I was reading it . Before I go there , I want to say this though there's a saying that goes adulthood is the time we spend recovering from childhood things that happened in our childhood and of course , as a childhood trauma survivor , I can relate to that saying wholeheartedly . Many of you know my story . I spent the first two decades of my life fighting rejection , abandonment , neglect and abuse all manner of traumatic experiences . They are called ACEs adverse childhood experiences and so when I heard the saying that we spend our adulthoods recovering from what happened in our childhoods , I was like , hmm , that definitely rings true , right for me . But I did also have to take some thought to the fact that for me , childhood is not relegated just to an age . Childhood encompasses the mindset , the dispositions , attitudes , beliefs , overall temperament of an individual , because you can be physically an adult but still operate in the mindset of a child , and so , again , I don't think childhood is relegated to an age . But I was reading this particular scripture in Luke , chapter 9 , and the Bible says that this particular father came to Jesus's disciples , right , and he came to have his son delivered . His son was possessed by an unclean spirit . The Bible says that this unclean spirit convulsed him , it threw him about , it made him stiff , it made him rigid and made him foam at the mouth . It was almost like it was giving him seizure-like behaviors . Right , and the Bible says that this father brought his son to Jesus's disciples to be delivered and Jesus's disciples could not cast the demon out . And Jesus sees that there are some going , you know , some back and forth going on between the father and the Jesus and Jesus's disciple , and Jesus basically says what's up , what's going on ? And the father says , listen , I've brought my child here to for the disciples to cast this demon out of them , and they could not . And so Jesus has a few words , he says a few words regarding that to the disciples and then he proceeds to deliver this boy , to cast this spirit out of the out of the boy . But when the spirit recognizes Jesus , the Bible says that he convulses the boy , he throws him about even more violently , the boy forms at the mouth and then falls on the ground and it is presumed that the boy is dead . Right .

Speaker 1 3:12

And this is when the story kind of takes on a different meaning for me , because I had never seen this type of interaction between Jesus and another person at the point of deliverance . Typically , when Jesus was about to deliver somebody , especially from a demonic spirit , he would ask the spirit with his name or he would either tell the spirit to shut him and come out right . But the Bible says , right before he goes to deliver this boy , that he asks the father how long has this been happening ? And the father's response was literally where it jumped out to me . The father says since childhood , since childhood . And I immediately started thinking about what are the things that still affect me to this day , that have origins in my childhood right ? What are the mindsets , what are the dispositions , what are the attitudes , what inability to emotionally regulate myself as a result of something that happened in childhood . And so , going back to the story in Mark , chapter 9 , I originally said it was Luke , chapter 9 , but it was actually Mark , chapter 9 .

Speaker 1 4:21

But , going back to the story , I thought it was so important that Jesus asked the father that question how long had this been happening ? See , because , even though he was about to deliver the boy from this spirit , what we were seeing , or what they were seeing at that particular time , was the manifestation of this demon , was the manifestation of this spirit in the boy's life . And sometimes we as a society , as a people , we often look at the manifestation of a person's problem attitude , disposition , the mindset . We see the later end of it or the result of it . But this was something that originated in the boy's childhood . And I think about all of the manifestations that I've had as far as my attitude , disposition , behavior , patterns , decisions , things I've done that were as a result of something that affected me from my childhood .

Speaker 1 5:14

And I think that this is a question that we need to consider in our own trauma healing journeys is how long have we been affected by what we've been affected by ? How far back do we need to go whether it stems from something that happened in our childhood or our adulthood ? How far back do we need to reflect on what we've experienced so that we understand why we are where we are today . And so I thought that question was so profound that Jesus acts , and I thought the fact that the father was able to trace it back . Hey , wait a minute . This has been happening since he was a child . What has been happening in your life , what has happened in your life since you were a child that affects you today ? And , honestly , that's a part of the trauma healing journey . That's the first step in being able to heal is identifying where this pain comes from , where this learned behavior comes from , where this coping mechanism comes from right , sometimes it's rooted in our past and we don't even realize it . This behavior comes from somewhere , and we have to begin to identify that .

Speaker 1 6:21

So I'm asking you the question how long , how long have you gone through what you've gone through ? How long have you been suffering in silence ? How long have you been hurting ? How long have you been in pain ? How long have you been angry ? How long have you been lashing out ? How long have you been holding yourself hostage to the past ? How long have you spent self-sabotaging ? How long have you been down on yourself ? How long have you been struggling with depression ? In regards to how long it's been and where the pain originates . It's never too late . It's never too late to heal . It was never too late to be made whole . It's never too late to start over , to begin again , to reconcile your past with your present , so that you have peace in your future .

Speaker 1 7:01

Because , remember I said in the beginning , after reading Mark 9 , it actually reminded me of another scripture , first Corinthians 1311 . It says when I was a child , I spake as a child , I understood as a child and I thought as a child . Right , it says , but when I became a man , I put away childish things . One version says when I became a man , I put away the things of childhood . And I'm not saying that it's easy to get over some of the things that we've experienced , whether they be in our childhood or not . I'm not saying that you know as soon as you become an adult that you should be able to let these things go , because it's a process . But what I am saying is that scripture lets me know that there is a place of healing and maturity that you can get to , where you put away the things that happen to you in childhood and the effects of those things and the behavior patterns that are as a result of some of the things that we've experienced in our childhoods , right ? So how do we do that ? How do we get to the place of healing and wholeness and reconciliation ? We first recognize where we've been . We recognize that we've been through something , that it has affected us right , regardless of how long ago it is that it happened .

Speaker 1 8:15

Sometimes people think that unresolved trauma has an expiration date , but it never expires if you never face it . It is always there , right . What I have learned is that unresolved trauma will beg to be validated . So you will continue certain patterns and cycles in your life until you acknowledge what you've been through right . And , like I said before on the podcast , then you have to be patient with yourself , right . Once you identify and recognize what you've been through and how it has affected you , there is a whole new process that's going to begin and you have to be patient with yourself even in that process that you don't harm your progress by rushing it , by making yourself I should be over this by now , or how long is it gonna take me , or just being down on yourself , because you have emotions and you are a human being . So you gotta be patient with yourself through your process . Be patient with yourself , even with your progress , because it may take some time to heal . It may take some time for you to see clearly . It may take some time for you to unlearn those behaviors . It may take some time for you to develop healthy coping mechanisms where you once had negative coping mechanisms .

Speaker 1 9:40

And the most important part of healing from your past , the most important part of the trauma healing journey , is to seek help . Y'all know I'm gonna quote the Bible because I love it , but the Bible says , in a multitude of counsel there is safety and it's important that we seek help , that we seek community , that we seek support , and so that can come in different ways . And what works best for me is not only having a trauma-informed mental health Therapist but also having people in my life who I can , you know , count on and rely on and speak to , even when I'm Don't have a session , you know , with my therapist . It it means for me also , you know , keeping constant communication open with the Lord , with talking to God about how I feel , where I'm going through , where I am From day to day . Listen , it's a new year , and happy new year , by the way , listen but we got some Opportunities that God wants to bless us with , some favorite , that God wants to bestow on us , some blessings that are long overdue .

Speaker 1 10:40

I know I've been praying for some things for a while and I started to think about maybe Some of the reasons why they were may have been hindered is because of my growth right , and I'm like well , god , search my heart , search my spirit , search my mind . Tell me where I'm still hurting or where there is potential in me to sabotage what you want to give me Because of what I've been doing the past right , and so it's time to turn a search light on all of us too , so that we can walk in with God really has for us . I really believe that there are some things that are coming to God's people this year . I really believe that there's some things that he wants to do in this , but first he has to make us whole . First is the hill is . First he has to deliver us right from things that we've been doing , experiences that we've had . The good news is that we can be like Paul in the latter scripture that we discussed , when he said when I became a man , I put away childish things . Therefore , let us seek healing in a wholeness . Let us endeavor to do what it takes to mature and to move forward in areas of our lives when we know we've been affected by our past .

Speaker 1 11:47

With that being said , I'm going to end in prayer . Father , thank you for your word that you left behind to encourage us , to inspire us , to motivate us . We are truly inspired and encouraged today to seek healing , to seek wholeness and to seek maturity . We know that you have so many things in store for us and that your thoughts to orders are peace and not evil , and to give us an expected in our hope in the future . We pray for the God , for all of the things that we've been through , all of the things that we've Suffered , all of the things that we've experienced that affect us to this day . We pray that you heal us , that you make us whole , that you deliver us , that you give us joy in peace in every area of our lives , so that we may move forward to the things that you have for us . We pray this prayer in Jesus' holy name , amen .

Speaker 1 12:36

Thanks so much for tuning in today , guys , listen , there is information in the show notes that you might wanna check out . At the bottom of each episode's webpage , there is a box that says show notes . The show notes will include today's topic information , as well as resources regarding finding the therapist . There's also some links to books that I'm reading to help me along the trauma healing journey . You can also find ways to support the show and my contact information . Listen , I am Ms Eve on all of my socials TikTok , instagram , facebook and YouTube . The Triumph Over Trauma podcast does also have its own YouTube page . You can follow me there if you like . Until next time , guys , don't forget Now . Thanks . Be unto God , who always causes us to triumph . I'll see you later . Bye .