{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":39.548,"endTime":40.868,"body":"Hey there"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":39.548,"endTime":40.868,"body":"podcast fans."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":41.168,"endTime":44.678,"body":"It's time for another episode"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":41.168,"endTime":44.678,"body":"from the Therapy Natters"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":44.678,"endTime":46.748000000000005,"body":"team I'm Richard Nicholls."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":46.928,"endTime":51.367999999999995,"body":"And with me is fellow"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":46.928,"endTime":51.367999999999995,"body":"psychotherapist, Fiona Biddle."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":51.818,"endTime":53.978,"body":"Welcome if you've never"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":51.818,"endTime":53.978,"body":"heard the show before."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":54.367999999999995,"endTime":58.778,"body":"Welcome back, if you have,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":54.367999999999995,"endTime":58.778,"body":"Hey Fiona, here we are again."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":58.958,"endTime":60.098,"body":"This is episode 23."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":60.188,"endTime":62.258,"body":"I can't believe"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":60.188,"endTime":62.258,"body":"it's episode 23 already."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":62.258,"endTime":64.55799999999999,"body":"I feel we've only"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":62.258,"endTime":64.55799999999999,"body":"just started, but."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":65.543,"endTime":68.033,"body":"Well, we started"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":65.543,"endTime":68.033,"body":"talking about doing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":68.033,"endTime":71.003,"body":"something like this a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":68.033,"endTime":71.003,"body":"couple of years ago."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":71.003,"endTime":71.723,"body":"Maybe."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":71.738,"endTime":73.238,"body":"was a very gradual"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":73.253,"endTime":74.12299999999999,"body":"I dream that?"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":74.533,"endTime":75.068,"body":"idea."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":75.068,"endTime":80.19800000000001,"body":"Wasn't it of, oh, that's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":75.068,"endTime":80.19800000000001,"body":"maybe, maybe, yeah."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":80.918,"endTime":85.44800000000001,"body":"We both got stuff in our heads"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":80.918,"endTime":85.44800000000001,"body":"that we wanted to get out."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":85.548,"endTime":87.52799999999999,"body":"I mentioned"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":85.548,"endTime":87.52799999999999,"body":"to a, a friend of mine."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":87.52799999999999,"endTime":89.238,"body":"Who's a psychotherapist."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":89.868,"endTime":91.638,"body":"Purely coincidentally,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":89.868,"endTime":91.638,"body":"she's a psychotherapist."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":91.638,"endTime":93.438,"body":"I know her through"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":91.638,"endTime":93.438,"body":"the other circles."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":93.67500000000001,"endTime":94.73500000000001,"body":"hadn't seen her for ages."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":95.065,"endTime":96.055,"body":"I went, ah, guess what?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":96.11500000000001,"endTime":98.555,"body":"I've got a new podcast project"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":96.11500000000001,"endTime":98.555,"body":"I've been doing and she"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":99.055,"endTime":99.775,"body":"sort of clapped her hands."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":99.775,"endTime":100.495,"body":"I went, oh, what's it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":100.525,"endTime":100.73500000000001,"body":"What's it?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":100.76499999999999,"endTime":101.125,"body":"What is it?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":101.125,"endTime":101.48500000000001,"body":"What is it?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":101.48500000000001,"endTime":101.875,"body":"What is it?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":101.88,"endTime":104.45500000000001,"body":"And I, and I said, oh, it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":101.88,"endTime":104.45500000000001,"body":"me and my supervisor, Fiona."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":104.45500000000001,"endTime":106.97999999999999,"body":"We turn the mics on, and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":104.45500000000001,"endTime":106.97999999999999,"body":"we take questions from the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":106.97999999999999,"endTime":108.87,"body":"public and we just have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":106.97999999999999,"endTime":108.87,"body":"a natter about the things"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":108.87,"endTime":110.61000000000001,"body":"that are on our mind and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":108.87,"endTime":110.61000000000001,"body":"about therapy and stuff."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":110.61000000000001,"endTime":113.07,"body":"And she went, oh my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":110.61000000000001,"endTime":113.07,"body":"God, that's fantastic."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":113.55000000000001,"endTime":116.49000000000001,"body":"Because sometimes I wish I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":113.55000000000001,"endTime":116.49000000000001,"body":"could record my supervision"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":116.49000000000001,"endTime":118.83000000000001,"body":"sessions because that's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":116.49000000000001,"endTime":118.83000000000001,"body":"when some of the most"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":118.83000000000001,"endTime":121.44,"body":"amazing content comes out."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":121.97999999999999,"endTime":124.44,"body":"The, the most amazing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":121.97999999999999,"endTime":124.44,"body":"perspectives on things"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":124.44,"endTime":126.36000000000001,"body":"that clients have brought"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":124.44,"endTime":126.36000000000001,"body":"in and as well as our"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":126.36000000000001,"endTime":127.38,"body":"own personal development."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":127.41,"endTime":128.22,"body":"Oh, I love it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":128.52,"endTime":132.33,"body":"Hello, Meg, if you're"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":128.52,"endTime":132.33,"body":"listening  I hope you are."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":133.656,"endTime":135.366,"body":"But we're not allowed to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":133.656,"endTime":135.366,"body":"record our and publish"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":135.366,"endTime":136.566,"body":"our supervision sessions."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":136.626,"endTime":138.696,"body":"That would be  crosses the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":138.896,"endTime":139.136,"body":"boundary."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":139.379,"endTime":141.209,"body":"I do a lot of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":139.379,"endTime":141.209,"body":"supervision, you know,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":141.895,"endTime":143.714,"body":"sometimes, they're"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":141.895,"endTime":143.714,"body":"very challenging."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":143.719,"endTime":146.995,"body":"And, if I had the pressure of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":143.719,"endTime":146.995,"body":"them being recorded, as well"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":146.995,"endTime":150.09,"body":"as trying to say the right"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":146.995,"endTime":150.09,"body":"things, that would be, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":150.15,"endTime":153.54,"body":"no, definitely too much, but"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":150.15,"endTime":153.54,"body":"it is a very creative space."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":153.726,"endTime":156.336,"body":"It is, but it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":153.726,"endTime":156.336,"body":"also a very private one."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":156.912,"endTime":158.929,"body":"For those that, have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":156.912,"endTime":158.929,"body":"never seen a counselor or"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":158.929,"endTime":163.999,"body":"psychotherapist, supervision"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":158.929,"endTime":163.999,"body":"is one of the very, very few"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":164.004,"endTime":168.019,"body":"places where anything that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":164.004,"endTime":168.019,"body":"your client would, would"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":168.019,"endTime":170.719,"body":"bring in is one of those"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":168.019,"endTime":170.719,"body":"few places where it would"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":170.719,"endTime":174.409,"body":"be talked about elsewhere"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":170.719,"endTime":174.409,"body":"and on your very first"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":174.409,"endTime":177.13899999999998,"body":"initial session with your"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":174.409,"endTime":177.13899999999998,"body":"counselor or psychotherapist,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":177.16899999999998,"endTime":181.69899999999998,"body":"they will say, this is my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":177.16899999999998,"endTime":181.69899999999998,"body":"confidentiality protocol."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":181.69899999999998,"endTime":182.749,"body":"These are the ethics."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":183.049,"endTime":184.819,"body":"What you say goes nowhere."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":185.245,"endTime":188.051,"body":"I will not disclose anything"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":185.245,"endTime":188.051,"body":"about you to anybody else"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":188.29,"endTime":191.047,"body":"except in these circumstances."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":191.37699999999998,"endTime":193.897,"body":"And then we have a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":191.37699999999998,"endTime":193.897,"body":"conversation about people"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":193.897,"endTime":197.94799999999998,"body":"who might be, in harm's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":193.897,"endTime":197.94799999999998,"body":"way and court orders"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":197.94799999999998,"endTime":198.668,"body":"and things like that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":198.668,"endTime":200.762,"body":"And one of the things I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":198.668,"endTime":200.762,"body":"specifically drop into my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":200.762,"endTime":204.452,"body":"sessions is, although I won't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":200.762,"endTime":204.452,"body":"mention you by name, there"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":204.452,"endTime":206.642,"body":"might be things that you bring"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":204.452,"endTime":206.642,"body":"into this session that I will"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":206.647,"endTime":208.052,"body":"talk about with my supervisor."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":208.772,"endTime":209.642,"body":"This is her name."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":209.702,"endTime":210.692,"body":"This is who she is."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":210.917,"endTime":212.99599999999998,"body":"She holds the confidentiality"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":210.917,"endTime":212.99599999999998,"body":"agreements in the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":212.99599999999998,"endTime":214.016,"body":"same way that I do."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":214.436,"endTime":216.71599999999998,"body":"And it's, it's, it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":214.436,"endTime":216.71599999999998,"body":"a wonderful resource."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":216.71599999999998,"endTime":217.736,"body":"Supervision is great."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":217.868,"endTime":219.03799999999998,"body":"Nobody ever complains."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":219.03799999999998,"endTime":220.988,"body":"Don't talk about me with"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":219.03799999999998,"endTime":220.988,"body":"your supervisor because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":220.993,"endTime":223.088,"body":"that's, that's not, that's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":220.993,"endTime":223.088,"body":"not, that's not good,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":223.668,"endTime":226.827,"body":"but there's a reason why"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":227.15099999999998,"endTime":229.43099999999998,"body":"anything to do with"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":227.15099999999998,"endTime":229.43099999999998,"body":"mental health or health in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":229.43099999999998,"endTime":230.96099999999998,"body":"general really is private."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":230.99099999999999,"endTime":235.161,"body":"It's personal because it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":230.99099999999999,"endTime":235.161,"body":"nobody's business, it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":235.161,"endTime":237.321,"body":"nobody's business what"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":235.161,"endTime":237.321,"body":"you bring into therapy."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":237.411,"endTime":239.541,"body":"It's nobody's business"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":237.411,"endTime":239.541,"body":"that you're seeing a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":239.541,"endTime":241.521,"body":"therapist or a counselor."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":241.85,"endTime":243.82999999999998,"body":"And this is what we were"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":241.85,"endTime":243.82999999999998,"body":"talking about briefly"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":243.89,"endTime":245.20999999999998,"body":"before we turned the mic on."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":245.65,"endTime":247.57999999999998,"body":"I, I have a phrase that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":245.65,"endTime":247.57999999999998,"body":"I'll say regularly."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":247.79,"endTime":249.62,"body":"Oh, I was talking to my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":247.79,"endTime":249.62,"body":"therapist the other day,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":249.62,"endTime":251.48,"body":"or I was talking to my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":249.62,"endTime":251.48,"body":"counselor the other day."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":251.9,"endTime":253.34,"body":"And I'll say things like that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":253.85299999999998,"endTime":256.493,"body":"I've never heard anybody"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":253.85299999999998,"endTime":256.493,"body":"else say that unless they're"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":256.493,"endTime":260.183,"body":"therapists themselves, but"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":256.493,"endTime":260.183,"body":"maybe my world is filtered."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":260.731,"endTime":263.09000000000003,"body":"I think there's,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":260.731,"endTime":263.09000000000003,"body":"a sort of American thing"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":263.09000000000003,"endTime":267.08,"body":"about having a therapist"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":263.09000000000003,"endTime":267.08,"body":"isn't there still that, that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":267.085,"endTime":269.33,"body":"it can be seen as a, um,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":269.56,"endTime":271.1,"body":"An"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":269.56,"endTime":271.1,"body":"unnecessary indulgence."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":271.285,"endTime":273.355,"body":"I was gonna say"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":271.285,"endTime":273.355,"body":"the other way round sort"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":273.355,"endTime":277.315,"body":"of seen as a badge of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":273.355,"endTime":277.315,"body":"honor, but it can be both."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":277.315,"endTime":277.885,"body":"Of course."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":278.322,"endTime":281.262,"body":"Some people will, will"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":278.322,"endTime":281.262,"body":"say the, you know, that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":281.382,"endTime":284.172,"body":"the, I have a therapist"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":281.382,"endTime":284.172,"body":"as, as a sort of sign"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":284.172,"endTime":286.074,"body":"of some sort of status."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":286.11199999999997,"endTime":289.347,"body":"But it does, it, it comes"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":286.11199999999997,"endTime":289.347,"body":"across as a sort of quite"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":289.437,"endTime":292.85699999999997,"body":"Americany sort of thing"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":289.437,"endTime":292.85699999999997,"body":"and not very British,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":293.63599999999997,"endTime":294.266,"body":"Hmm."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":294.491,"endTime":296.411,"body":"I think it,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":294.491,"endTime":296.411,"body":"these things are, these"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":296.411,"endTime":297.551,"body":"things are easing."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":298.165,"endTime":300.745,"body":"I've definitely"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":298.165,"endTime":300.745,"body":"noticed a difference."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":300.775,"endTime":303.265,"body":"People are more willing"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":300.775,"endTime":303.265,"body":"to talk about it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":303.265,"endTime":305.365,"body":"And we see this from"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":303.265,"endTime":305.365,"body":"the referrals we get."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":305.876,"endTime":310.901,"body":"I remember probably it was"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":305.876,"endTime":310.901,"body":"about 2003, at a conference,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":311.341,"endTime":315.221,"body":"a guy doing a presentation"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":311.341,"endTime":315.221,"body":"on building your practice."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":315.221,"endTime":317.801,"body":"And he said, oh, you can't"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":315.221,"endTime":317.801,"body":"ever get any referrals"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":317.801,"endTime":319.991,"body":"from your clients because"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":317.801,"endTime":319.991,"body":"nobody ever talks about it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":320.327,"endTime":323.29699999999997,"body":"Well, even at that time, I can"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":320.327,"endTime":323.29699999999997,"body":"remember sitting in the back"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":323.29699999999997,"endTime":326.537,"body":"of the room, looking at Shaun"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":323.29699999999997,"endTime":326.537,"body":"and going, what of course"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":326.537,"endTime":331.877,"body":"people talk about it, but it"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":326.537,"endTime":331.877,"body":"certainly has increased that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":331.877,"endTime":334.967,"body":"people are much more willing"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":331.877,"endTime":334.967,"body":"to talk about the fact that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":334.967,"endTime":338.507,"body":"they have therapy and talk"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":334.967,"endTime":338.507,"body":"about the fact that they"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":338.537,"endTime":341.074,"body":"have mental health issues."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":341.524,"endTime":345.484,"body":"And I just want to sort of put"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":341.524,"endTime":345.484,"body":"that on the continuum because"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":345.484,"endTime":348.034,"body":"everybody has mental health"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":345.484,"endTime":348.034,"body":"issues just as everybody"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":348.034,"endTime":351.408,"body":"has physical health issues,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":348.034,"endTime":351.408,"body":"whether that's, they might"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":351.408,"endTime":354.018,"body":"get a cold from time to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":351.408,"endTime":354.018,"body":"time or a pain in the toe."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":354.427,"endTime":358.314,"body":"Everybody has these things,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":354.427,"endTime":358.314,"body":"and everybody's on a continuum"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":358.314,"endTime":360.924,"body":"and sometimes they feel"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":358.314,"endTime":360.924,"body":"more anxious than they would"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":360.924,"endTime":363.084,"body":"like to do or feel a bit"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":360.924,"endTime":363.084,"body":"more down than they would"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":363.084,"endTime":366.024,"body":"like to do, or have a bit"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":363.084,"endTime":366.024,"body":"more existential angst."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":366.024,"endTime":367.794,"body":"As we talked about last"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":366.024,"endTime":367.794,"body":"week, then they would"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":368.094,"endTime":371.287,"body":"like to do mental health"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":368.094,"endTime":371.287,"body":"is not a  something you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":371.287,"endTime":372.397,"body":"have, or you don't have."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":373.09499999999997,"endTime":374.415,"body":"There's a big"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":373.09499999999997,"endTime":374.415,"body":"difference between mental"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":374.415,"endTime":375.97499999999997,"body":"health and mental illness."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":376.485,"endTime":377.955,"body":"They're different things."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":378.495,"endTime":381.614,"body":"And  like we said on one of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":378.495,"endTime":381.614,"body":"our very early recordings."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":382.064,"endTime":386.154,"body":"Sometimes people come to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":382.064,"endTime":386.154,"body":"therapy wanting a diagnosis."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":386.364,"endTime":388.044,"body":"And that, isn't what we do."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":388.194,"endTime":392.334,"body":"We, we help people maybe"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":388.194,"endTime":392.334,"body":"after a diagnosis because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":392.334,"endTime":395.004,"body":"they've been given this label"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":392.334,"endTime":395.004,"body":"and they go, well, what,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":395.004,"endTime":397.314,"body":"now we go, well, we'll try"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":395.004,"endTime":397.314,"body":"and find you a therapist."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":397.314,"endTime":398.214,"body":"Let's get one sorted."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":398.214,"endTime":401.424,"body":"And they go on a waiting"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":398.214,"endTime":401.424,"body":"list and can't, can't wait."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":401.424,"endTime":403.794,"body":"So they see one"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":401.424,"endTime":403.794,"body":"privately potentially."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":404.483,"endTime":406.53,"body":"But we don't do"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":404.483,"endTime":406.53,"body":"that diagnosing."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":407.325,"endTime":410.325,"body":"But a lot of people are"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":407.325,"endTime":410.325,"body":"self diagnosing via Dr."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":410.325,"endTime":413.895,"body":"Google a lot nowadays, or"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":410.325,"endTime":413.895,"body":"they'll listen to podcasts and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":413.895,"endTime":418.582,"body":"go, ah, I listen to a podcast"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":413.895,"endTime":418.582,"body":"episode all about narcissistic"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":418.582,"endTime":419.842,"body":"personality disorder."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":419.962,"endTime":423.274,"body":"I wonder if I have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":419.962,"endTime":423.274,"body":"it now, there is a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":423.274,"endTime":424.969,"body":"particular condition."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":424.969,"endTime":425.86899999999997,"body":"I forget the name of it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":426.269,"endTime":428.029,"body":"It's not, well, it's not"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":426.269,"endTime":428.029,"body":"a condition condition,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":428.11899999999997,"endTime":431.74899999999997,"body":"but what you find is that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":428.11899999999997,"endTime":431.74899999999997,"body":"doctors in practice will"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":431.839,"endTime":435.889,"body":"find themselves diagnosing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":431.839,"endTime":435.889,"body":"themselves with all sorts"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":436.36899999999997,"endTime":439.669,"body":"of physical ailments because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":436.36899999999997,"endTime":439.669,"body":"they're learning about them."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":440.029,"endTime":442.099,"body":"The more that you know,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":440.029,"endTime":442.099,"body":"the more that it's in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":442.104,"endTime":445.759,"body":"your awareness, the more"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":442.104,"endTime":445.759,"body":"tempting it is to go,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":445.764,"endTime":446.899,"body":"well, I have that problem."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":446.929,"endTime":449.11899999999997,"body":"Well, I must have an"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":446.929,"endTime":449.11899999999997,"body":"endocrine issue here."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":449.11899999999997,"endTime":451.27,"body":"Oh, I must have a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":449.11899999999997,"endTime":451.27,"body":"dopaminergic problem here."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":451.93,"endTime":452.86,"body":"Maybe not."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":452.89,"endTime":454.663,"body":"It's only because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":452.89,"endTime":454.663,"body":"you understand it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":454.723,"endTime":456.943,"body":"And that little bit of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":454.723,"endTime":456.943,"body":"intelligence, that little"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":456.943,"endTime":459.103,"body":"bit of knowledge, isn't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":456.943,"endTime":459.103,"body":"always a good thing."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":459.793,"endTime":462.51,"body":"And I was reminded of that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":459.793,"endTime":462.51,"body":"because of the, message"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":462.57,"endTime":464.46,"body":"we got sent recently."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":464.985,"endTime":465.915,"body":"is it my turn to read it"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":466.14,"endTime":467.43,"body":"I really can't"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":466.14,"endTime":467.43,"body":"remember, but go"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":467.59499999999997,"endTime":468.315,"body":"say it is."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":468.455,"endTime":469.025,"body":"I'll do it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":469.655,"endTime":471.515,"body":"It was from Deborah,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":469.655,"endTime":471.515,"body":"from London."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":471.635,"endTime":472.205,"body":"Hello, Deborah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":472.47499999999997,"endTime":474.455,"body":"She says, Hi"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":472.47499999999997,"endTime":474.455,"body":"Richard and Fiona."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":474.605,"endTime":476.465,"body":"I have a question"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":474.605,"endTime":476.465,"body":"about disclosing my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":476.465,"endTime":478.025,"body":"mental health problems."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":478.53499999999997,"endTime":481.53499999999997,"body":"I have depression and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":478.53499999999997,"endTime":481.53499999999997,"body":"anxiety and I'm prone"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":481.53499999999997,"endTime":484.265,"body":"to anger outbursts from"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":481.53499999999997,"endTime":484.265,"body":"taking things personally."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":484.565,"endTime":485.555,"body":"I am single."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":485.945,"endTime":488.495,"body":"And my problems have held me"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":485.945,"endTime":488.495,"body":"back from dating because I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":488.495,"endTime":491.675,"body":"don't want to get my hopes"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":488.495,"endTime":491.675,"body":"up and fall in love just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":491.68,"endTime":494.375,"body":"for them to reject me when"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":491.68,"endTime":494.375,"body":"I'm triggered and angry."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":494.765,"endTime":498.215,"body":"I wonder if it would be better"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":494.765,"endTime":498.215,"body":"to disclose early on that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":498.21999999999997,"endTime":499.53499999999997,"body":"I'm prone to these things."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":499.94,"endTime":502.15999999999997,"body":"But I also fear that all"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":499.94,"endTime":502.15999999999997,"body":"that would happen is I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":502.15999999999997,"endTime":505.07,"body":"get rejected sooner and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":502.15999999999997,"endTime":505.07,"body":"potentially more often."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":505.4,"endTime":507.29,"body":"Any advice will be"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":505.4,"endTime":507.29,"body":"gratefully received."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":507.40999999999997,"endTime":508.15999999999997,"body":"Love the podcast."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":508.15999999999997,"endTime":509.15,"body":"Thanks in advance."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":509.57,"endTime":512.75,"body":"Well, thank you, Deborah,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":509.57,"endTime":512.75,"body":"for messaging in, and I'm"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":512.75,"endTime":517.19,"body":"sorry that you're feeling a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":512.75,"endTime":517.19,"body":"bit stuck with this because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":518.0980000000001,"endTime":521.398,"body":"whether somebody's issues are"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":518.0980000000001,"endTime":521.398,"body":"about self-esteem, whether"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":521.398,"endTime":524.668,"body":"they're about anxiety and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":521.398,"endTime":524.668,"body":"depression, I hear this phrase"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":524.668,"endTime":528.25,"body":"where people will say, I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":524.668,"endTime":528.25,"body":"can't be in a relationship"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":528.25,"endTime":529.12,"body":"with somebody else."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":529.1800000000001,"endTime":530.89,"body":"Unless I sort out the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":529.1800000000001,"endTime":530.89,"body":"relationship I have with"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":530.89,"endTime":535.51,"body":"myself first, and I get why"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":530.89,"endTime":535.51,"body":"people might think that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":535.51,"endTime":541.0,"body":"And for some people that might"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":535.51,"endTime":541.0,"body":"be the case, but if somebody"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":541.484,"endTime":543.524,"body":"doesn't love themselves,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":541.484,"endTime":543.524,"body":"for example, if they've got"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":543.524,"endTime":547.244,"body":"very low self-esteem having"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":543.524,"endTime":547.244,"body":"somebody else in their life"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":547.244,"endTime":548.504,"body":"that does respect them."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":549.1640000000001,"endTime":550.344,"body":"That does show"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":550.832,"endTime":553.412,"body":"positive regard, whether"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":550.832,"endTime":553.412,"body":"that's a therapist or a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":553.532,"endTime":556.5920000000001,"body":"close friend or an intimate"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":553.532,"endTime":556.5920000000001,"body":"partner that can help"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":556.907,"endTime":559.547,"body":"with our personal growth"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":556.907,"endTime":559.547,"body":"that can help with our"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":559.552,"endTime":560.8670000000001,"body":"anxiety and depression."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":561.527,"endTime":565.397,"body":"So I don't think people"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":561.527,"endTime":565.397,"body":"should be scared about dating."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":565.402,"endTime":567.407,"body":"If they've got mental"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":565.402,"endTime":567.407,"body":"health problems."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":567.971,"endTime":571.091,"body":"Also the way that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":567.971,"endTime":571.091,"body":"Deborah worded these"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":571.091,"endTime":574.091,"body":"things were as absolutes."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":574.7180000000001,"endTime":580.508,"body":"she said I have depression"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":574.7180000000001,"endTime":580.508,"body":"and anxiety and I'm prone"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":580.508,"endTime":583.2080000000001,"body":"to anger outbursts from"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":580.508,"endTime":583.2080000000001,"body":"taking things personally."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":584.0780000000001,"endTime":584.288,"body":"So."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":584.932,"endTime":587.332,"body":"She's taking the labels."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":587.5160000000001,"endTime":590.576,"body":"We've no idea if this has"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":587.5160000000001,"endTime":590.576,"body":"been diagnosed professionally,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":590.576,"endTime":595.346,"body":"but however it is, she's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":590.576,"endTime":595.346,"body":"taking a label on, of having"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":595.8860000000001,"endTime":598.976,"body":"depression in the same way"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":595.8860000000001,"endTime":598.976,"body":"that somebody might take on a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":598.976,"endTime":601.4060000000001,"body":"label of, I have migraines or."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":602.0980000000001,"endTime":604.8580000000001,"body":"Whatever, and I have anxiety."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":604.8580000000001,"endTime":610.738,"body":"Well, everybody has anxiety"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":604.8580000000001,"endTime":610.738,"body":"because that's a normal human"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":610.738,"endTime":614.368,"body":"condition and depression,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":610.738,"endTime":614.368,"body":"you know, everybody has"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":614.428,"endTime":618.9580000000001,"body":"down days and up days and"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":614.428,"endTime":618.9580000000001,"body":"you know, maybe too many"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":618.9580000000001,"endTime":622.753,"body":"down ones, but it could be"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":618.9580000000001,"endTime":622.753,"body":"seriously depressed as in"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":622.753,"endTime":627.673,"body":"the diagnostic way of looking"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":622.753,"endTime":627.673,"body":"at it, clinical depression."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":628.4430000000001,"endTime":630.413,"body":"I tend to think of it"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":628.4430000000001,"endTime":630.413,"body":"as capital D or little"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":630.4830000000001,"endTime":632.113,"body":"D she's used a little"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":630.4830000000001,"endTime":632.113,"body":"D, but that doesn't"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":632.118,"endTime":633.0730000000001,"body":"necessarily mean anything."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":633.999,"endTime":637.509,"body":"Prone to outbursts from"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":633.999,"endTime":637.509,"body":"taking things personally."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":637.509,"endTime":641.7370000000001,"body":"Now, in some cultures around"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":637.509,"endTime":641.7370000000001,"body":"the world, having anger"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":641.7420000000001,"endTime":643.807,"body":"outbursts is sort of the norm,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":644.432,"endTime":647.279,"body":"Yeah, I did a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":644.432,"endTime":647.279,"body":"Patreon podcast episode."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":647.5490000000001,"endTime":648.604,"body":"I'm sure it was a Patreon one."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":648.604,"endTime":650.6990000000001,"body":"Not a public one fairly"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":648.604,"endTime":650.6990000000001,"body":"recently about this."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":650.6990000000001,"endTime":653.0210000000001,"body":"And I did look at the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":650.6990000000001,"endTime":653.0210000000001,"body":"studies and literally from"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":653.0210000000001,"endTime":655.961,"body":"Northern Estonia down to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":653.0210000000001,"endTime":655.961,"body":"Southern Portugal, Europe,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":655.966,"endTime":658.0010000000001,"body":"particularly it's normal."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":658.2410000000001,"endTime":661.1510000000001,"body":"It's quite common to have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":658.2410000000001,"endTime":661.1510000000001,"body":"these angry outbursts"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":661.3610000000001,"endTime":662.441,"body":"because there's a problem."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":662.9110000000001,"endTime":665.2510000000001,"body":"And then 10 minutes later,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":662.9110000000001,"endTime":665.2510000000001,"body":"it's forgotten, gone,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":665.821,"endTime":667.441,"body":"and they just move on,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":665.821,"endTime":667.441,"body":"get on with their day."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":667.5310000000001,"endTime":669.811,"body":"And I dunno whether you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":667.5310000000001,"endTime":669.811,"body":"found this, actually, if"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":669.811,"endTime":674.0590000000001,"body":"you have a British client,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":669.811,"endTime":674.0590000000001,"body":"who's married somebody who's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":674.0590000000001,"endTime":677.239,"body":"from a culture where it is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":674.0590000000001,"endTime":677.239,"body":"quite an explosive thing."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":677.479,"endTime":679.609,"body":"They're quite, they can"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":677.479,"endTime":679.609,"body":"be quite triggered, cuz"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":679.969,"endTime":681.589,"body":"I'm just not used to this."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":681.859,"endTime":684.649,"body":"Cuz the meaning behind"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":681.859,"endTime":684.649,"body":"that explosive behavior"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":684.649,"endTime":687.1690000000001,"body":"is different for them"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":684.649,"endTime":687.1690000000001,"body":"than it is for somebody"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":687.1690000000001,"endTime":688.999,"body":"from Spain or Portugal or"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":689.339,"endTime":689.5790000000001,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":689.5790000000001,"endTime":693.599,"body":"The very typically British"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":689.5790000000001,"endTime":693.599,"body":"thing is that anger is"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":693.599,"endTime":695.399,"body":"bad, but that's nonsense."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":695.7890000000001,"endTime":698.969,"body":"Anger is a terribly"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":695.7890000000001,"endTime":698.969,"body":"appropriate emotion,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":698.969,"endTime":699.869,"body":"quite a lot of the time."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":700.1690000000001,"endTime":704.0690000000001,"body":"And if you take something"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":700.1690000000001,"endTime":704.0690000000001,"body":"personally, i.e something"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":704.0690000000001,"endTime":708.4290000000001,"body":"has hurt you then to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":704.0690000000001,"endTime":708.4290000000001,"body":"have some response to it"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":708.4590000000001,"endTime":710.4090000000001,"body":"is surely more healthy."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":710.6940000000001,"endTime":712.485,"body":"Than not having"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":710.6940000000001,"endTime":712.485,"body":"a response to it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":712.485,"endTime":717.158,"body":"So my feeling is that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":712.485,"endTime":717.158,"body":"perhaps Deborah has been in"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":717.1880000000001,"endTime":720.6500000000001,"body":"an environment where people"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":717.1880000000001,"endTime":720.6500000000001,"body":"have been telling her that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":720.6550000000001,"endTime":724.5200000000001,"body":"her anger is inappropriate"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":720.6550000000001,"endTime":724.5200000000001,"body":"when maybe it is appropriate."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":725.2040000000001,"endTime":729.2620000000001,"body":"There's a theory in"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":725.2040000000001,"endTime":729.2620000000001,"body":"transactional analysis."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":729.4580000000001,"endTime":731.798,"body":"Which is called"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":729.4580000000001,"endTime":731.798,"body":"Racket Feelings."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":732.368,"endTime":738.118,"body":"The idea being that during"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":732.368,"endTime":738.118,"body":"childhood, we find, our"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":738.3080000000001,"endTime":741.494,"body":"default reaction emotion."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":741.9090000000001,"endTime":745.6500000000001,"body":"And one that works"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":741.9090000000001,"endTime":745.6500000000001,"body":"for us as a child."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":746.19,"endTime":748.74,"body":"And I'm wondering if"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":746.19,"endTime":748.74,"body":"Deborah's anger response"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":748.74,"endTime":750.09,"body":"is her Racket Feeling."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":750.09,"endTime":754.62,"body":"So it's, it's just the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":750.09,"endTime":754.62,"body":"default that just happens when"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":754.62,"endTime":757.35,"body":"something feels not right."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":758.0870000000001,"endTime":762.767,"body":"So I found this website,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":758.0870000000001,"endTime":762.767,"body":"Psychology Muffins."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":763.557,"endTime":765.557,"body":"Now, that's a quite a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":763.557,"endTime":765.557,"body":"good phrase, isn't it?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":765.879,"endTime":766.629,"body":"I'll"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":765.879,"endTime":766.629,"body":"have one of those,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":766.629,"endTime":767.1690000000001,"body":"please."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":767.3520000000001,"endTime":769.542,"body":"I dunno the ingredients would"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":767.3520000000001,"endTime":769.542,"body":"be in a psychology muffin,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":769.572,"endTime":770.652,"body":"probably a lot of coffee."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":773.207,"endTime":773.3430000000001,"body":"Uh"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":773.4730000000001,"endTime":774.883,"body":"Speaking"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":773.4730000000001,"endTime":774.883,"body":"from experience."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":775.0630000000001,"endTime":776.3230000000001,"body":"I am mostly caffeine."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":776.773,"endTime":777.5930000000001,"body":"Are you okay."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":778.7230000000001,"endTime":781.767,"body":"So the ideas, uh, um,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":778.7230000000001,"endTime":781.767,"body":"quoting here from this"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":781.767,"endTime":784.3770000000001,"body":"website, you surely have"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":781.767,"endTime":784.3770000000001,"body":"met people who tend to have"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":784.3770000000001,"endTime":788.397,"body":"emotional responses, seem"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":784.3770000000001,"endTime":788.397,"body":"unfit for the situation."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":788.9820000000001,"endTime":791.682,"body":"Someone who cries when you'd"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":788.9820000000001,"endTime":791.682,"body":"expect them to be angry"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":791.8620000000001,"endTime":794.6220000000001,"body":"or gets angry when sadness"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":791.8620000000001,"endTime":794.6220000000001,"body":"would seem appropriate."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":795.192,"endTime":797.7120000000001,"body":"Someone who always"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":795.192,"endTime":797.7120000000001,"body":"looks and feels alarmed,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":797.802,"endTime":800.832,"body":"regardless of what's going"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":797.802,"endTime":800.832,"body":"on, someone who starts"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":800.832,"endTime":803.6120000000001,"body":"laughing when talking about"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":800.832,"endTime":803.6120000000001,"body":"a painful, scary experience."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":804.3380000000001,"endTime":807.518,"body":"And this happens so often that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":804.3380000000001,"endTime":807.518,"body":"it becomes the new normal,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":807.518,"endTime":810.3380000000001,"body":"well, I don't think the word"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":807.518,"endTime":810.3380000000001,"body":"new needs to come in there"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":810.3380000000001,"endTime":813.8480000000001,"body":"because if it's learnt from"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":810.3380000000001,"endTime":813.8480000000001,"body":"childhood, it's going to be"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":813.8480000000001,"endTime":815.5580000000001,"body":"the way that they respond."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":816.393,"endTime":819.993,"body":"So if we think that we all"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":816.393,"endTime":819.993,"body":"did this, that we all, as"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":819.993,"endTime":826.399,"body":"children found our way of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":819.993,"endTime":826.399,"body":"responding that worked for us."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":826.591,"endTime":829.5010000000001,"body":"And I suppose there could"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":826.591,"endTime":829.5010000000001,"body":"be a gender difference here"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":829.5010000000001,"endTime":833.407,"body":"that some boys might be"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":829.5010000000001,"endTime":833.407,"body":"more likely to have found"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":833.407,"endTime":837.457,"body":"that anger worked and girls"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":833.407,"endTime":837.457,"body":"found that crying, worked."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":837.9970000000001,"endTime":842.2570000000001,"body":"Sorry to be sexist about"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":837.9970000000001,"endTime":842.2570000000001,"body":"it, but it's, that's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":842.8670000000001,"endTime":843.7570000000001,"body":"there for a reason."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":844.3570000000001,"endTime":844.7170000000001,"body":"Uh,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":844.8720000000001,"endTime":845.162,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":846.187,"endTime":850.177,"body":"so it's, it's that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":846.187,"endTime":850.177,"body":"looking for within the self."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":851.017,"endTime":852.067,"body":"You can do it when"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":851.017,"endTime":852.067,"body":"you're looking at"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":852.067,"endTime":852.8470000000001,"body":"other people as well."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":852.8470000000001,"endTime":857.623,"body":"But when examining yourself"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":852.8470000000001,"endTime":857.623,"body":"is to think about how you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":857.623,"endTime":861.4060000000001,"body":"do respond typically to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":857.623,"endTime":861.4060000000001,"body":"when something goes wrong."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":862.11,"endTime":864.4200000000001,"body":"So that's why I'm thinking"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":862.11,"endTime":864.4200000000001,"body":"that perhaps Deborah's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":864.4200000000001,"endTime":866.25,"body":"Racket Feeling is, is anger."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":866.2800000000001,"endTime":869.3100000000001,"body":"So she's responding with"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":866.2800000000001,"endTime":869.3100000000001,"body":"anger when other people"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":869.3100000000001,"endTime":872.9960000000001,"body":"don't feel that anger is the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":869.3100000000001,"endTime":872.9960000000001,"body":"appropriate response and then."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":872.9960000000001,"endTime":877.206,"body":"She's going to get a different"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":872.9960000000001,"endTime":877.206,"body":"reaction from them then"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":877.296,"endTime":881.2860000000001,"body":"the times, you know, if, if"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":877.296,"endTime":881.2860000000001,"body":"somebody kicks your dog and"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":881.2860000000001,"endTime":883.6560000000001,"body":"you say, oh, that was lovely."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":884.106,"endTime":886.428,"body":"How sweet, that's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":884.106,"endTime":886.428,"body":"pretty inappropriate."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":886.6980000000001,"endTime":889.9530000000001,"body":"You expect to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":886.6980000000001,"endTime":889.9530000000001,"body":"respond with anger."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":890.793,"endTime":893.1030000000001,"body":"So anger can be an"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":890.793,"endTime":893.1030000000001,"body":"appropriate response, but"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":893.1030000000001,"endTime":895.2030000000001,"body":"if she's finding that she's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":893.1030000000001,"endTime":895.2030000000001,"body":"responding with anger."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":895.2030000000001,"endTime":898.178,"body":"When that logically isn't"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":895.2030000000001,"endTime":898.178,"body":"the correct response."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":899.028,"endTime":900.048,"body":"It might be a racket feeling."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":901.0390000000001,"endTime":902.9590000000001,"body":"If you have an"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":901.0390000000001,"endTime":902.9590000000001,"body":"insecure attachment style"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":902.9590000000001,"endTime":906.619,"body":"that means that when you feel"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":902.9590000000001,"endTime":906.619,"body":"a connection to somebody,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":906.624,"endTime":912.4090000000001,"body":"you have to lean in towards"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":906.624,"endTime":912.4090000000001,"body":"them because to not is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":912.4140000000001,"endTime":914.099,"body":"dangerous, you could push you."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":914.099,"endTime":916.4290000000001,"body":"You don't want them to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":914.099,"endTime":916.4290000000001,"body":"leave you because you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":916.4340000000001,"endTime":917.5390000000001,"body":"have an insecure style."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":918.042,"endTime":921.3530000000001,"body":"Then you might find that you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":918.042,"endTime":921.3530000000001,"body":"can be overbearing, send too"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":921.3530000000001,"endTime":923.4530000000001,"body":"many text messages too soon."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":924.023,"endTime":925.883,"body":"And then when they don't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":924.023,"endTime":925.883,"body":"reciprocate could be"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":925.883,"endTime":927.2030000000001,"body":"offended too easily."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":927.883,"endTime":930.533,"body":"or more easily than is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":927.883,"endTime":930.533,"body":"probably warranted and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":930.533,"endTime":934.5830000000001,"body":"maybe get angry more than"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":930.533,"endTime":934.5830000000001,"body":"is fair, and then push"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":934.5830000000001,"endTime":936.623,"body":"them away because, oh, you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":934.5830000000001,"endTime":936.623,"body":"can't be trusted after all."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":936.623,"endTime":937.523,"body":"You just ignored me."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":937.793,"endTime":939.9530000000001,"body":"Well, actually they were"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":937.793,"endTime":939.9530000000001,"body":"just in the shower or they"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":939.9530000000001,"endTime":941.2130000000001,"body":"were with their family."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":942.023,"endTime":943.2230000000001,"body":"They were gone to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":942.023,"endTime":943.2230000000001,"body":"their parents' house"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":943.2230000000001,"endTime":944.2130000000001,"body":"for lunch, whatever."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":944.9630000000001,"endTime":946.793,"body":"But the meaning"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":944.9630000000001,"endTime":946.793,"body":"behind it might be,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":947.0630000000001,"endTime":948.2030000000001,"body":"I can't trust people."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":948.493,"endTime":950.6930000000001,"body":"Another one scratched"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":948.493,"endTime":950.6930000000001,"body":"off the list."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":951.0680000000001,"endTime":955.7180000000001,"body":"And maybe it is a good"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":951.0680000000001,"endTime":955.7180000000001,"body":"idea, early on to say, this"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":955.7180000000001,"endTime":957.248,"body":"is my attachment style."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":957.488,"endTime":959.4680000000001,"body":"I can be a bit"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":957.488,"endTime":959.4680000000001,"body":"insecure sometimes."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":960.0980000000001,"endTime":962.0780000000001,"body":"Don't be offended if I get"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":960.0980000000001,"endTime":962.0780000000001,"body":"quite angry, if you don't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":962.0780000000001,"endTime":964.988,"body":"reply, if you haven't replied"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":962.0780000000001,"endTime":964.988,"body":"to my text messages too"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":964.988,"endTime":967.432,"body":"quickly and I get triggered,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":964.988,"endTime":967.432,"body":"but I could understand why"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":967.432,"endTime":969.8620000000001,"body":"people wouldn't want to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":967.432,"endTime":969.8620000000001,"body":"have that conversation with"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":969.8620000000001,"endTime":972.832,"body":"somebody they hardly know"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":969.8620000000001,"endTime":972.832,"body":"in case it pushes them away."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":973.582,"endTime":974.8620000000001,"body":"And it just feeds the problem."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":974.8620000000001,"endTime":975.302,"body":"Doesn't it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":975.729,"endTime":977.4540000000001,"body":"I think, you know,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":975.729,"endTime":977.4540000000001,"body":"obviously, as I was saying"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":977.514,"endTime":980.904,"body":"earlier that we do talk"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":977.514,"endTime":980.904,"body":"more about, mental health,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":980.904,"endTime":983.6370000000001,"body":"but I, I still don't think"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":980.904,"endTime":983.6370000000001,"body":"it's the normal, first date"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":983.657,"endTime":988.283,"body":"conversation or even a around"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":983.657,"endTime":988.283,"body":"the table in a pub with your"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":988.283,"endTime":991.133,"body":"mates, however long you've"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":988.283,"endTime":991.133,"body":"known them conversation."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":991.332,"endTime":994.056,"body":"And I would include"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":991.332,"endTime":994.056,"body":"women in that as well."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":994.197,"endTime":998.292,"body":"You might discuss the fact"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":994.197,"endTime":998.292,"body":"that you feel something, but"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":998.292,"endTime":1003.1930000000001,"body":"it's not usual, to get into"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":998.292,"endTime":1003.1930000000001,"body":"the why's and wherefor's as"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1003.1930000000001,"endTime":1005.173,"body":"to what's going on for you."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1005.306,"endTime":1008.4530000000001,"body":"And to do so might scare"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1005.306,"endTime":1008.4530000000001,"body":"people off  I suppose the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1008.4530000000001,"endTime":1011.4830000000001,"body":"thing is you, you can never"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1008.4530000000001,"endTime":1011.4830000000001,"body":"possibly know in advance"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1011.513,"endTime":1015.4830000000001,"body":"whether talking about this"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1011.513,"endTime":1015.4830000000001,"body":"or that or the other, in the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1015.488,"endTime":1018.8860000000001,"body":"same way that you don't know"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1015.488,"endTime":1018.8860000000001,"body":"whether talking about art or"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1018.8860000000001,"endTime":1023.1790000000001,"body":"football or music or whatever"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1018.8860000000001,"endTime":1023.1790000000001,"body":"it might be is going to be"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1023.629,"endTime":1026.074,"body":"a good thing or a bad thing."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1026.174,"endTime":1029.322,"body":"But I would say it's more"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1026.174,"endTime":1029.322,"body":"important for Deborah"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1029.322,"endTime":1032.891,"body":"to understand herself"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1029.322,"endTime":1032.891,"body":"at this stage and to see"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1032.891,"endTime":1034.511,"body":"where this is coming from."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1034.511,"endTime":1038.291,"body":"Why, why she's reacting"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1034.511,"endTime":1038.291,"body":"in these ways, when"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1038.291,"endTime":1039.311,"body":"it, it is appropriate."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1039.311,"endTime":1041.321,"body":"When it's inappropriate."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1041.471,"endTime":1043.271,"body":"We talked about that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1041.471,"endTime":1043.271,"body":"in terms of emotions, a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1043.271,"endTime":1045.073,"body":"few episodes ago, and."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1045.249,"endTime":1048.309,"body":"Then also going back"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1045.249,"endTime":1048.309,"body":"to what you were saying"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1048.309,"endTime":1052.727,"body":"about the, the judgment of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1048.309,"endTime":1052.727,"body":"society, to not necessarily"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1052.727,"endTime":1053.9869999999999,"body":"worry too much about it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1055.123,"endTime":1056.5629999999999,"body":"We are supposed"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1055.123,"endTime":1056.5629999999999,"body":"to have a fight or"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1056.5629999999999,"endTime":1057.523,"body":"flight response."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1057.973,"endTime":1061.903,"body":"Without it, we don't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1057.973,"endTime":1061.903,"body":"get any signals from"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1061.903,"endTime":1066.403,"body":"our emotions, from our"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1061.903,"endTime":1066.403,"body":"unconscious that drives"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1066.8229999999999,"endTime":1069.493,"body":"our actions, those feelings"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1066.8229999999999,"endTime":1069.493,"body":"are there for a reason."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1069.793,"endTime":1072.883,"body":"If our body feels an"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1069.793,"endTime":1072.883,"body":"emotion, it's trying to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1072.883,"endTime":1075.3129999999999,"body":"say you wanna move towards"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1072.883,"endTime":1075.3129999999999,"body":"something or you wanna"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1075.3129999999999,"endTime":1076.483,"body":"move away from something."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1076.993,"endTime":1079.5729999999999,"body":"To try and stop that feeling"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1076.993,"endTime":1079.5729999999999,"body":"and go, I don't wanna"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1079.5729999999999,"endTime":1082.106,"body":"feel anxious is dangerous."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1082.532,"endTime":1083.8819999999998,"body":"Like a fear of Heights."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1084.3529999999998,"endTime":1087.443,"body":"When people come to therapy,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1084.3529999999998,"endTime":1087.443,"body":"especially as hypnotherapist,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1087.443,"endTime":1088.6129999999998,"body":"they might say, well,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1087.443,"endTime":1088.6129999999998,"body":"I've got this problem"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1088.6129999999998,"endTime":1090.233,"body":"with a fear of Heights go."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1090.233,"endTime":1092.8129999999999,"body":"It's not a, it's quite normal"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1090.233,"endTime":1092.8129999999999,"body":"to have a fear of Heights."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1092.933,"endTime":1093.983,"body":"We don't wanna stop that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1094.0729999999999,"endTime":1095.633,"body":"But what we we've"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1094.0729999999999,"endTime":1095.633,"body":"gotta work on it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1095.633,"endTime":1099.743,"body":"If it's so intense that it"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1095.633,"endTime":1099.743,"body":"stops you enjoying a good"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1099.743,"endTime":1102.263,"body":"view or stops you enjoying,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1099.743,"endTime":1102.263,"body":"you're just driving over"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1102.263,"endTime":1104.513,"body":"a bridge, whatever it"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1102.263,"endTime":1104.513,"body":"is, that's the trigger."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1105.0529999999999,"endTime":1105.383,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1105.473,"endTime":1108.5629999999999,"body":"We wanna deal with that, but"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1105.473,"endTime":1108.5629999999999,"body":"it's unrealistic to think we"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1108.5629999999999,"endTime":1112.013,"body":"can just switch it off and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1108.5629999999999,"endTime":1112.013,"body":"have no problem with heights"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1112.013,"endTime":1112.793,"body":"otherwise."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1113.453,"endTime":1115.993,"body":"I remember"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1113.453,"endTime":1115.993,"body":"somebody, I worked with,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1116.312,"endTime":1117.452,"body":"who had fear of heights."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1117.452,"endTime":1121.8319999999999,"body":"And I just, I just used"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1117.452,"endTime":1121.8319999999999,"body":"a, to me, it was a throw"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1121.8319999999999,"endTime":1125.282,"body":"away comment, which I"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1121.8319999999999,"endTime":1125.282,"body":"didn't even realize was"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1125.282,"endTime":1126.302,"body":"going to be significant."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1126.302,"endTime":1128.282,"body":"I said, well, of course,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1126.302,"endTime":1128.282,"body":"if a fear of heights"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1128.282,"endTime":1129.3319999999999,"body":"is a fear of falling"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1129.581,"endTime":1130.511,"body":"well, it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1129.581,"endTime":1130.511,"body":"a fear of landing."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1132.186,"endTime":1133.086,"body":"and the guy just"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1133.307,"endTime":1137.0629999999999,"body":"sat there went, oh,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1133.307,"endTime":1137.0629999999999,"body":"and I didn't need"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1137.0629999999999,"endTime":1137.963,"body":"to do anything else."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1137.963,"endTime":1139.733,"body":"We did carry on and do"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1137.963,"endTime":1139.733,"body":"the rest of the session."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1140.888,"endTime":1142.118,"body":"He didn't need anything else."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1142.118,"endTime":1143.4679999999998,"body":"As soon as he realized"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1143.933,"endTime":1144.153,"body":"Huh,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1144.4879999999998,"endTime":1148.3039999999999,"body":"that that's what he was"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1144.4879999999998,"endTime":1148.3039999999999,"body":"afraid of, then it, it, it was"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1148.4089999999999,"endTime":1150.5449999999998,"body":"what perspective"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1148.4089999999999,"endTime":1150.5449999999998,"body":"shift,  cuz he was able"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1150.5449999999998,"endTime":1154.325,"body":"to tell himself if he had"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1150.5449999999998,"endTime":1154.325,"body":"that fear experience that"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1155.5,"endTime":1155.7949999999998,"body":"not"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1156.26,"endTime":1158.09,"body":"So nothing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1156.26,"endTime":1158.09,"body":"to be scared of this"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1158.3149999999998,"endTime":1158.585,"body":"yeah."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1158.645,"endTime":1161.615,"body":"Cause he wasn't in a situation"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1158.645,"endTime":1161.615,"body":"where he was going to fall."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1161.615,"endTime":1164.356,"body":"You know, if you, if you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1161.615,"endTime":1164.356,"body":"climb up the Eiffel tower"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1165.2559999999999,"endTime":1167.566,"body":"or drive over the Severn"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1165.2559999999999,"endTime":1167.566,"body":"Bridge or whatever, if"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1167.566,"endTime":1170.866,"body":"you're not going to fall,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1167.566,"endTime":1170.866,"body":"you have to do something,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1171.309,"endTime":1172.924,"body":"extraordinary to fall."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1172.975,"endTime":1174.205,"body":"it's about"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1172.975,"endTime":1174.205,"body":"trusting ourself."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1174.4879999999998,"endTime":1178.568,"body":"If our body is telling us"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1174.4879999999998,"endTime":1178.568,"body":"at an unconscious level,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1179.318,"endTime":1182.498,"body":"I need to step in, in case"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1179.318,"endTime":1182.498,"body":"you make a mistake, I need"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1182.498,"endTime":1184.808,"body":"to step in, in case you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1182.498,"endTime":1184.808,"body":"accidentally throw yourself"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1184.808,"endTime":1185.598,"body":"over the edge of this."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1186.128,"endTime":1187.7179999999998,"body":"I need to step in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1186.128,"endTime":1187.7179999999998,"body":"and hold you back."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1188.7079999999999,"endTime":1191.018,"body":"We need to be able to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1188.7079999999999,"endTime":1191.018,"body":"tell our unconscious to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1191.018,"endTime":1193.388,"body":"tell our body I am safe."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1193.4779999999998,"endTime":1194.318,"body":"I can be trusted."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1195.0649999999998,"endTime":1196.115,"body":"For our body to learn."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1196.115,"endTime":1197.165,"body":"Oh, you can be trusted."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1197.195,"endTime":1198.5549999999998,"body":"I don't need to step"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1197.195,"endTime":1198.5549999999998,"body":"in all the time."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1198.5549999999998,"endTime":1201.455,"body":"I'll still be here making"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1198.5549999999998,"endTime":1201.455,"body":"some noises in the background."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1201.485,"endTime":1202.445,"body":"I'll be back here,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1202.475,"endTime":1203.465,"body":"Saying Be careful."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1203.645,"endTime":1205.355,"body":"but I don't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1203.645,"endTime":1205.355,"body":"need to be right here."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1206.225,"endTime":1206.675,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1206.865,"endTime":1209.095,"body":"I just need to turn those"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1206.865,"endTime":1209.095,"body":"signals down, quieter."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1209.671,"endTime":1212.791,"body":"Well, we can't stop the what"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1209.671,"endTime":1212.791,"body":"ifs going through our head,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1212.8509999999999,"endTime":1215.8809999999999,"body":"cuz the reason we've populated"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1212.8509999999999,"endTime":1215.8809999999999,"body":"the planet, the reason"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1215.886,"endTime":1219.451,"body":"we've become as successful"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1215.886,"endTime":1219.451,"body":"a species as we have, is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1219.451,"endTime":1223.548,"body":"because we have frontal lobes"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1219.451,"endTime":1223.548,"body":"to, to think with and wonder"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1223.548,"endTime":1230.298,"body":"about and have those What If"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1223.548,"endTime":1230.298,"body":"moments and like Deborah she's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1230.3029999999999,"endTime":1236.047,"body":"thinking, what if I disclose"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1230.3029999999999,"endTime":1236.047,"body":"that I'm overly sensitive"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1236.047,"endTime":1237.187,"body":"and it puts them off?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1237.585,"endTime":1239.01,"body":"Well, what if it does?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1239.47,"endTime":1239.87,"body":"And?"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1240.22,"endTime":1240.3799999999999,"body":"And"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1240.3799999999999,"endTime":1244.248,"body":"she's also doing the, what"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1240.3799999999999,"endTime":1244.248,"body":"if I don't and then I react"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1244.4579999999999,"endTime":1245.898,"body":"way and that puts 'em off."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1246.398,"endTime":1246.7279999999998,"body":"Mm,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1247.638,"endTime":1251.7749999999999,"body":"And she can't with"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1247.638,"endTime":1251.7749999999999,"body":"any given person, goes on a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1251.78,"endTime":1255.365,"body":"date with as to what their"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1251.78,"endTime":1255.365,"body":"reactions are going to be."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1256.203,"endTime":1258.703,"body":"I'd like to encourage Deborah"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1256.203,"endTime":1258.703,"body":"to think about the Racket"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1258.723,"endTime":1261.546,"body":"Feeling idea and see if it's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1258.723,"endTime":1261.546,"body":"something that you Deborah"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1261.551,"endTime":1265.2839999999999,"body":"learnt when you were a child"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1261.551,"endTime":1265.2839999999999,"body":"that got your needs met."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1265.4769999999999,"endTime":1269.402,"body":"And if you find that that is"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1265.4769999999999,"endTime":1269.402,"body":"the case, which it may be,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1269.402,"endTime":1273.587,"body":"or may not be, but if then"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1269.402,"endTime":1273.587,"body":"perhaps you, just intervene"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1273.647,"endTime":1276.96,"body":"a little bit for yourself"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1273.647,"endTime":1276.96,"body":"with your reactions If you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1276.96,"endTime":1278.52,"body":"start it, you go, oh, no."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1278.6699999999998,"endTime":1279.0,"body":"Hmm."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1279.252,"endTime":1280.182,"body":"I'm not going that way."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1280.812,"endTime":1282.042,"body":"I'm gonna go this way."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1282.762,"endTime":1285.072,"body":"Take a little bit of a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1282.762,"endTime":1285.072,"body":"pause and especially on"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1285.072,"endTime":1287.652,"body":"something like it's, when"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1285.072,"endTime":1287.652,"body":"she's been offended, I"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1287.652,"endTime":1290.509,"body":"think that was the phrase,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1287.652,"endTime":1290.509,"body":"you can take a bit of time."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1290.599,"endTime":1292.579,"body":"Don't have to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1290.599,"endTime":1292.579,"body":"immediately respond."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1292.944,"endTime":1296.724,"body":"it's a useful"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1292.944,"endTime":1296.724,"body":"habit to get into when it"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1296.724,"endTime":1299.604,"body":"comes to things like text"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1296.724,"endTime":1299.604,"body":"messages or returning calls."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1299.973,"endTime":1301.893,"body":"If there's something you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1299.973,"endTime":1301.893,"body":"feel in the moment that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1301.893,"endTime":1304.983,"body":"you want to say, you might"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1301.893,"endTime":1304.983,"body":"literally just have to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1304.983,"endTime":1307.173,"body":"wait, might be 10 minutes."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1307.263,"endTime":1308.3429999999998,"body":"Might be 10 seconds."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1308.348,"endTime":1311.133,"body":"You might literally just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1308.348,"endTime":1311.133,"body":"have to count to 10 before"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1311.138,"endTime":1312.423,"body":"you then compose a reply."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1312.903,"endTime":1315.3329999999999,"body":"But certainly if you have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1312.903,"endTime":1315.3329999999999,"body":"accidentally composed"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1315.338,"endTime":1316.773,"body":"a reply whilst angry."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1317.3129999999999,"endTime":1321.3629999999998,"body":"Wait, before you send it"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1317.3129999999999,"endTime":1321.3629999999998,"body":"just in case, actually"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1321.732,"endTime":1322.992,"body":"there was no tonality."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1323.532,"endTime":1324.762,"body":"In the original message."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1324.822,"endTime":1329.431,"body":"So you couldn't see or hear"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1324.822,"endTime":1329.431,"body":"what was really being said."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1329.431,"endTime":1332.251,"body":"And instead accidentally"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1329.431,"endTime":1332.251,"body":"heard something that belongs"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1332.251,"endTime":1336.4099999999999,"body":"to a past experience so"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1332.251,"endTime":1336.4099999999999,"body":"that when, like she said,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1336.48,"endTime":1339.1029999999998,"body":"specifically, um, oh yes."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1339.1029999999998,"endTime":1341.5629999999999,"body":"I'm prone to anger outbursts"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1339.1029999999998,"endTime":1341.5629999999999,"body":"and taking things personally."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1341.5629999999999,"endTime":1342.223,"body":"That's what it was."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1342.972,"endTime":1345.532,"body":"And like you say, if there"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1342.972,"endTime":1345.532,"body":"were some things that went"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1345.532,"endTime":1346.5819999999999,"body":"on in your past Deborah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1347.019,"endTime":1348.729,"body":"If there was a time when"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1347.019,"endTime":1348.729,"body":"you focused on that, when"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1348.729,"endTime":1351.309,"body":"you were quite young,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1348.729,"endTime":1351.309,"body":"do bear that in mind."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1351.3719999999998,"endTime":1354.1019999999999,"body":"We've said before, the way"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1351.3719999999998,"endTime":1354.1019999999999,"body":"our memories are consolidated"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1354.1319999999998,"endTime":1355.6319999999998,"body":"is through emotion."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1355.8419999999999,"endTime":1358.002,"body":"The more emotions we"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1355.8419999999999,"endTime":1358.002,"body":"experience about something,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1358.002,"endTime":1360.012,"body":"the more likely it is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1358.002,"endTime":1360.012,"body":"the brain goes, right."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1360.0169999999998,"endTime":1362.0919999999999,"body":"Never forget that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1360.0169999999998,"endTime":1362.0919999999999,"body":"that's important."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1363.462,"endTime":1367.782,"body":"And so 20 years later,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1363.462,"endTime":1367.782,"body":"or however long, we have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1367.782,"endTime":1371.442,"body":"something that uses the same,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1367.782,"endTime":1371.442,"body":"neurological string still"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1371.442,"endTime":1373.992,"body":"uses those same neurons in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1371.442,"endTime":1373.992,"body":"the brain for, oh, I've just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1373.992,"endTime":1376.542,"body":"been criticized or I've just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1373.992,"endTime":1376.542,"body":"been rejected or I've just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1376.542,"endTime":1377.8919999999998,"body":"been insulted or whatever."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1378.702,"endTime":1381.133,"body":"And it might be that you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1378.702,"endTime":1381.133,"body":"weren't, but your brain out of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1381.133,"endTime":1384.403,"body":"habit and expectation has just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1381.133,"endTime":1384.403,"body":"got that one way of going."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1384.8229999999999,"endTime":1388.543,"body":"And I, I know it's really"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1384.8229999999999,"endTime":1388.543,"body":"hard and some, for some people"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1388.543,"endTime":1392.386,"body":"it might take a day to see"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1388.543,"endTime":1392.386,"body":"a different perspective."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1392.566,"endTime":1394.186,"body":"You had a client about that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1394.306,"endTime":1395.356,"body":"There was fear of Heights."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1395.386,"endTime":1395.686,"body":"Actually."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1395.686,"endTime":1396.556,"body":"It's a fear of falling."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1396.7659999999998,"endTime":1398.116,"body":"That's all they"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1396.7659999999998,"endTime":1398.116,"body":"needed to hear."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1398.4759999999999,"endTime":1402.466,"body":"And in an instant they changed"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1398.4759999999999,"endTime":1402.466,"body":"and shifted their perspective."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1402.946,"endTime":1405.466,"body":"Now, for some people"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1402.946,"endTime":1405.466,"body":"that might take a day"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1405.466,"endTime":1407.686,"body":"of, of thinking about"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1405.466,"endTime":1407.686,"body":"before their perspective"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1407.691,"endTime":1408.556,"body":"has shifted and gone."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1408.7859999999998,"endTime":1410.4759999999999,"body":"Oh, I see."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1410.596,"endTime":1411.2859999999998,"body":"Oh no, it's fine."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1411.916,"endTime":1414.196,"body":"And for others, it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1411.916,"endTime":1414.196,"body":"half a day for others."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1414.196,"endTime":1416.0059999999999,"body":"It's 10 seconds for"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1414.196,"endTime":1416.0059999999999,"body":"others it's instant."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1416.046,"endTime":1418.3909999999998,"body":"And for one person,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1416.046,"endTime":1418.3909999999998,"body":"it might 10 seconds, one time"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1418.3909999999998,"endTime":1421.697,"body":"and a day another, a technique"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1418.3909999999998,"endTime":1421.697,"body":"that can be really useful."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1421.754,"endTime":1423.644,"body":"a very simple one"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1421.754,"endTime":1423.644,"body":"is to write it down."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1424.024,"endTime":1427.011,"body":"So if you feel, offended"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1424.024,"endTime":1427.011,"body":"or you've taken something"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1427.0159999999998,"endTime":1431.1609999999998,"body":"personally to write it down"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1427.0159999999998,"endTime":1431.1609999999998,"body":"almost as a, it could be,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1431.341,"endTime":1434.251,"body":"doesn't have to be, but write"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1431.341,"endTime":1434.251,"body":"it as a script, in a play"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1434.7379999999998,"endTime":1438.128,"body":"of what the person actually"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1434.7379999999998,"endTime":1438.128,"body":"said, what they did, what"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1438.2179999999998,"endTime":1440.6779999999999,"body":"their feelings were behind it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1440.918,"endTime":1444.098,"body":"So imagine what the other"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1440.918,"endTime":1444.098,"body":"person was feeling and what"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1444.1029999999998,"endTime":1446.7379999999998,"body":"your response was, what you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1444.1029999999998,"endTime":1446.7379999999998,"body":"might have said, what you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1446.7379999999998,"endTime":1449.9479999999999,"body":"didn't say, what you were"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1446.7379999999998,"endTime":1449.9479999999999,"body":"feeling, write it all down."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1450.293,"endTime":1453.912,"body":"And very likely to give a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1450.293,"endTime":1453.912,"body":"different perspective, cos"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1454.492,"endTime":1458.452,"body":"most people, most of time are"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1454.492,"endTime":1458.452,"body":"not meaning to give offense."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1459.262,"endTime":1464.135,"body":"If somebody is meaning"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1459.262,"endTime":1464.135,"body":"to hurt, well then"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1464.135,"endTime":1464.954,"body":"there's something wrong."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1465.648,"endTime":1466.398,"body":"There's Something wrong."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1466.421,"endTime":1468.3709999999999,"body":"If you set out to hurt"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1466.421,"endTime":1468.3709999999999,"body":"somebody's feelings."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1469.1209999999999,"endTime":1472.721,"body":"So most of the time, the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1469.1209999999999,"endTime":1472.721,"body":"things that Debra is taking"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1472.721,"endTime":1476.011,"body":"personally, I will presume"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1472.721,"endTime":1476.011,"body":"because I don't know you Debra"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1476.3809999999999,"endTime":1479.681,"body":"but most of the time, people"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1476.3809999999999,"endTime":1479.681,"body":"aren't intending to do that."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1480.461,"endTime":1484.001,"body":"It's inadvertent,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1480.461,"endTime":1484.001,"body":"it's careless."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1484.3609999999999,"endTime":1487.451,"body":"It's something that they don't"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1484.3609999999999,"endTime":1487.451,"body":"realise is important to you,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1487.991,"endTime":1490.751,"body":"or they got it wrong, you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1487.991,"endTime":1490.751,"body":"know, all sorts of things,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1491.3509999999999,"endTime":1492.671,"body":"but writing it all out."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1492.998,"endTime":1496.2079999999999,"body":"Can really help get to an"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1492.998,"endTime":1496.2079999999999,"body":"understanding of the process."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1496.667,"endTime":1501.4669999999999,"body":"What we would do in a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1496.667,"endTime":1501.4669999999999,"body":"therapy environment, at least"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1501.473,"endTime":1505.925,"body":"what I do in situations like"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1501.473,"endTime":1505.925,"body":"this, I would say if you were"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1505.925,"endTime":1509.7089999999998,"body":"to explain to them calmly, if"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1505.925,"endTime":1509.7089999999998,"body":"they were here in this room."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1509.896,"endTime":1511.733,"body":"And this was a,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1509.896,"endTime":1511.733,"body":"couple's counselling"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1511.753,"endTime":1512.743,"body":"session, for example."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1512.743,"endTime":1514.213,"body":"And they were just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1512.743,"endTime":1514.213,"body":"listening to you."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1514.213,"endTime":1515.743,"body":"They'd had 10"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1514.213,"endTime":1515.743,"body":"sessions already."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1515.743,"endTime":1517.8629999999998,"body":"They know how to effectively"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1515.743,"endTime":1517.8629999999998,"body":"and efficiently listen."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1518.453,"endTime":1521.5629999999999,"body":"And you, can calmly tell"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1518.453,"endTime":1521.5629999999999,"body":"them how you felt about"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1521.5629999999999,"endTime":1524.931,"body":"what they said, what"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1521.5629999999999,"endTime":1524.931,"body":"would they say in reply?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1525.951,"endTime":1528.821,"body":"And so often the client"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1525.951,"endTime":1528.821,"body":"says things like, well,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1528.821,"endTime":1531.921,"body":"they they would say, I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1528.821,"endTime":1531.921,"body":"didn't mean it like that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1532.811,"endTime":1533.6109999999999,"body":"Okay."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1534.3609999999999,"endTime":1536.3609999999999,"body":"So there's a part of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1534.3609999999999,"endTime":1536.3609999999999,"body":"you deep down knows they"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1536.366,"endTime":1537.4109999999998,"body":"didn't mean it like that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1537.945,"endTime":1538.395,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1538.8149999999998,"endTime":1540.5249999999999,"body":"That's cos that's what,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1538.8149999999998,"endTime":1540.5249999999999,"body":"that is what they would say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1540.5549999999998,"endTime":1541.395,"body":"And what would you say?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1541.965,"endTime":1542.985,"body":"Well, maybe I'd forgive them."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1542.985,"endTime":1545.0249999999999,"body":"Maybe I'd say, OK whatever."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1545.7,"endTime":1548.129,"body":"The, I didn't mean it"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1545.7,"endTime":1548.129,"body":"like that is a very common"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1548.129,"endTime":1551.489,"body":"one of course, because you"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1548.129,"endTime":1551.489,"body":"know, people aren't always"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1551.569,"endTime":1555.289,"body":"brilliant at communication"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1551.569,"endTime":1555.289,"body":"and are sometimes careless"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1555.289,"endTime":1556.1589999999999,"body":"and just don't think."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1556.262,"endTime":1557.972,"body":"But then there's also"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1556.262,"endTime":1557.972,"body":"the times when people"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1557.972,"endTime":1561.272,"body":"say something that's"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1557.972,"endTime":1561.272,"body":"factually true and somebody"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1561.272,"endTime":1562.952,"body":"takes offense at it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1563.231,"endTime":1567.071,"body":"And that that's something"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1563.231,"endTime":1567.071,"body":"to, to think about as well."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1567.339,"endTime":1569.109,"body":"It's a tricky one"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1567.339,"endTime":1569.109,"body":"in, in society."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1569.109,"endTime":1570.6689999999999,"body":"There's certain things"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1569.109,"endTime":1570.6689999999999,"body":"you're not supposed to"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1570.674,"endTime":1575.0049999999999,"body":"say to people, even though"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1570.674,"endTime":1575.0049999999999,"body":"they're factually true"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1575.5729999999999,"endTime":1577.943,"body":"I felt quite"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1575.5729999999999,"endTime":1577.943,"body":"embarrassed for a friend"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1577.943,"endTime":1581.693,"body":"of mine once when my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1577.943,"endTime":1581.693,"body":"son was quite little, I"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1581.693,"endTime":1582.653,"body":"dunno how young he was."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1582.653,"endTime":1583.943,"body":"Maybe he was four."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1583.943,"endTime":1585.743,"body":"Maybe he was five,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1583.943,"endTime":1585.743,"body":"something like that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1586.3429999999998,"endTime":1590.2939999999999,"body":"And, uh, a friend visited and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1586.3429999999998,"endTime":1590.2939999999999,"body":"went onto the patio and my"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1590.2939999999999,"endTime":1591.5539999999999,"body":"son was walking behind her."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1592.0939999999998,"endTime":1594.847,"body":"And as she walked out,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1592.0939999999998,"endTime":1594.847,"body":"Billy said gosh, you've got"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1594.9669999999999,"endTime":1596.222,"body":"a big bottom haven't you?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1598.059,"endTime":1599.211,"body":"And nobody said anything."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1599.605,"endTime":1601.855,"body":"And, uh, I told I've reminded"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1599.605,"endTime":1601.855,"body":"him of that story a couple"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1601.855,"endTime":1603.955,"body":"of years ago and he's, and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1601.855,"endTime":1603.955,"body":"he puts his head in his hand."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1603.955,"endTime":1605.635,"body":"He's like, I didn't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1603.955,"endTime":1605.635,"body":"say that to her."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1605.665,"endTime":1610.075,"body":"Yeah, you did mate, because"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1605.665,"endTime":1610.075,"body":"from your perspective, she"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1610.075,"endTime":1613.965,"body":"had a big bottom, but she"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1610.075,"endTime":1613.965,"body":"didn't wanna hear that."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1613.965,"endTime":1614.715,"body":"I'd have thought."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1615.135,"endTime":1616.0649999999998,"body":"I doubt very much."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1616.0649999999998,"endTime":1618.3149999999998,"body":"She was happy to hear"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1616.0649999999998,"endTime":1618.3149999999998,"body":"that she was probably"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1618.3149999999998,"endTime":1619.605,"body":"accepting of her big bottom,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1619.965,"endTime":1620.355,"body":"Well,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1620.705,"endTime":1620.925,"body":"you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1621.465,"endTime":1622.395,"body":"there's a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1621.465,"endTime":1622.395,"body":"chance she wasn't."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1622.875,"endTime":1624.735,"body":"No, we don't say those"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1622.875,"endTime":1624.735,"body":"things and yeah, it"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1624.735,"endTime":1625.8149999999998,"body":"is factually true."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1626.385,"endTime":1628.935,"body":"If you were to define the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1626.385,"endTime":1628.935,"body":"size of bottoms on a scale"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1628.935,"endTime":1631.215,"body":"of small to big hers was big."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1632.066,"endTime":1636.184,"body":"It's factually true, but that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1632.066,"endTime":1636.184,"body":"doesn't make it inoffensive."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1636.204,"endTime":1637.254,"body":"Does it just cause it's true."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1638.5739999999998,"endTime":1641.964,"body":"Then you get into the"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1638.5739999999998,"endTime":1641.964,"body":"territory of the importance of"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1642.0839999999998,"endTime":1643.854,"body":"being able to tell white lies."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1644.01,"endTime":1644.85,"body":"Yes."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1644.999,"endTime":1648.307,"body":"You know, if you get a"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1644.999,"endTime":1648.307,"body":"present and you don't like it,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1648.7,"endTime":1651.167,"body":"do you say I don't like it?"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1651.394,"endTime":1653.464,"body":"Or do you say, oh, thank you."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1653.464,"endTime":1654.0939999999998,"body":"Wonderful."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1654.0939999999998,"endTime":1655.3239999999998,"body":"That's so sweet of you."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1655.3239999999998,"endTime":1655.924,"body":"Thanks."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1656.54,"endTime":1657.05,"body":"Oxfam"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1658.378,"endTime":1661.2279999999998,"body":"Truth can hurt,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1658.378,"endTime":1661.2279999999998,"body":"which is a bit weird"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1661.7079999999999,"endTime":1662.578,"body":"when you think about it."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1662.608,"endTime":1665.308,"body":"Why should it, if"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1662.608,"endTime":1665.308,"body":"you've got a big bottom,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1665.878,"endTime":1667.018,"body":"you've got a big bottom."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1667.4679999999998,"endTime":1668.388,"body":"Why should that hurt?"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1668.548,"endTime":1669.6779999999999,"body":"But it does"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1669.884,"endTime":1671.354,"body":"because of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1669.884,"endTime":1671.354,"body":"the meaning behind it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1672.164,"endTime":1676.134,"body":"If the meaning is this is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1672.164,"endTime":1676.134,"body":"a small child who is just"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1676.21,"endTime":1678.6699999999998,"body":"figuring himself out in the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1676.21,"endTime":1678.6699999999998,"body":"world, it's not offensive."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1679.33,"endTime":1684.355,"body":"If it's How can I criticize"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1679.33,"endTime":1684.355,"body":"you and have power over you?"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1685.3149999999998,"endTime":1687.985,"body":"And for Deborah to say"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1685.3149999999998,"endTime":1687.985,"body":"to somebody on, you know,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1687.985,"endTime":1691.7949999999998,"body":"date number 3 oh, 1 thing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1687.985,"endTime":1691.7949999999998,"body":"I've never mentioned is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1692.0649999999998,"endTime":1693.235,"body":"mental health struggles."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1693.745,"endTime":1698.5449999999998,"body":"And then their date leans"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1693.745,"endTime":1698.5449999999998,"body":"forward and says, oh, you have"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1698.5449999999998,"endTime":1699.745,"body":"some mental health struggles."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1700.945,"endTime":1701.635,"body":"Yes."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1701.635,"endTime":1702.7749999999999,"body":"Let me take a deep"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1701.635,"endTime":1702.7749999999999,"body":"breath and tell you a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1702.7749999999999,"endTime":1703.825,"body":"little bit about it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1704.335,"endTime":1705.8049999999998,"body":"That's a painful thing."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1706.225,"endTime":1709.135,"body":"That's a difficult,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1706.225,"endTime":1709.135,"body":"vulnerable thing to do."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1709.195,"endTime":1713.335,"body":"And then if they don't know"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1709.195,"endTime":1713.335,"body":"what to say, because we live"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1713.335,"endTime":1715.7949999999998,"body":"in a culture that doesn't know"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1713.335,"endTime":1715.7949999999998,"body":"how to communicate properly"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1715.7949999999998,"endTime":1716.605,"body":"about stuff like this."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1716.605,"endTime":1717.685,"body":"Cause we're pretty rubbish."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1717.925,"endTime":1719.905,"body":"If they don't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1717.925,"endTime":1719.905,"body":"know what to say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1720.595,"endTime":1722.875,"body":"That doesn't mean they're"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1720.595,"endTime":1722.875,"body":"not interested in you or"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1722.875,"endTime":1723.985,"body":"that they don't care for you."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1724.0449999999998,"endTime":1727.3149999999998,"body":"It means they don't what"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1724.0449999999998,"endTime":1727.3149999999998,"body":"to say in the same way when"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1727.645,"endTime":1731.394,"body":"somebody's Mum dies and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1727.645,"endTime":1731.394,"body":"you just dunno what to say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1731.904,"endTime":1733.3139999999999,"body":"That is the culture we've got."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1733.374,"endTime":1734.364,"body":"It is starting to shift."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1734.364,"endTime":1736.134,"body":"And I like to think that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1734.364,"endTime":1736.134,"body":"we are doing our bit"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1736.134,"endTime":1738.5939999999998,"body":"to help, but sometimes"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1736.134,"endTime":1738.5939999999998,"body":"people don't know what to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1738.5939999999998,"endTime":1739.164,"body":"say"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1739.4489999999998,"endTime":1741.639,"body":"We dunno what to say"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1739.4489999999998,"endTime":1741.639,"body":"and the best thing to say in"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1741.639,"endTime":1744.849,"body":"my opinion, or my experience,"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1741.639,"endTime":1744.849,"body":"when you dunno what to say"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1744.849,"endTime":1747.039,"body":"is I dunno what to say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1747.646,"endTime":1748.066,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1748.636,"endTime":1749.836,"body":"That's exactly right."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1750.556,"endTime":1751.4859999999999,"body":"Exactly."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1751.773,"endTime":1753.513,"body":"I hope that the people that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1751.773,"endTime":1753.513,"body":"are on the other side of"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1753.513,"endTime":1755.5829999999999,"body":"the, of that conversation,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1753.513,"endTime":1755.5829999999999,"body":"if somebody was to say"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1755.5829999999999,"endTime":1758.3819999999998,"body":"that to them, I hope"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1755.5829999999999,"endTime":1758.3819999999998,"body":"they can then know it's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1758.3819999999998,"endTime":1759.8519999999999,"body":"perfectly fine to say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1760.6019999999999,"endTime":1761.652,"body":"I dunno what to say."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1761.931,"endTime":1763.311,"body":"And the other person"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1761.931,"endTime":1763.311,"body":"goes, that's fine."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1763.521,"endTime":1765.051,"body":"I don't mind that you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1763.521,"endTime":1765.051,"body":"don't know what to say."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1765.481,"endTime":1766.311,"body":"Work work"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1766.311,"endTime":1767.1509999999998,"body":"it out between them."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1767.8029999999999,"endTime":1768.133,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1768.943,"endTime":1769.423,"body":"So."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1769.816,"endTime":1772.5159999999998,"body":"Another episode done"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1769.816,"endTime":1772.5159999999998,"body":"and dusted Fiona."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1772.865,"endTime":1774.105,"body":"They go so quickly"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1774.645,"endTime":1775.165,"body":"they do"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1775.655,"endTime":1778.052,"body":"I hope they go"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1775.655,"endTime":1778.052,"body":"reasonably quickly for"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1778.052,"endTime":1779.0169999999998,"body":"the listener as well."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1779.242,"endTime":1781.012,"body":"30 minutes is"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1779.242,"endTime":1781.012,"body":"a good commute time."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1781.072,"endTime":1783.6219999999998,"body":"I think the average commute"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1781.072,"endTime":1783.6219999999998,"body":"in the UK, well, it used to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1783.6219999999998,"endTime":1786.292,"body":"be 40 minutes was the average,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1783.6219999999998,"endTime":1786.292,"body":"but a lot of people are"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1786.292,"endTime":1787.402,"body":"working from home nowadays."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1787.402,"endTime":1790.6119999999999,"body":"So they're listening to this"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1787.402,"endTime":1790.6119999999999,"body":"on their lunch break or in, in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1790.6119999999999,"endTime":1793.0,"body":"the background whilst they're"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1790.6119999999999,"endTime":1793.0,"body":"tinkering away, whatever"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1793.0049999999999,"endTime":1793.8899999999999,"body":"it is they do for a living."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1794.75,"endTime":1798.096,"body":"However you listen, please"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1794.75,"endTime":1798.096,"body":"do give us a rating."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1798.216,"endTime":1800.4959999999999,"body":"If you think we're doing"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1798.216,"endTime":1800.4959999999999,"body":"a great job, go onto"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1800.4959999999999,"endTime":1802.296,"body":"whatever app that you're"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1800.4959999999999,"endTime":1802.296,"body":"listening to this on."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1802.416,"endTime":1805.806,"body":"Find the button for review"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1802.416,"endTime":1805.806,"body":"and go love these two."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1806.211,"endTime":1807.1409999999998,"body":"Great folks."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1807.4109999999998,"endTime":1809.511,"body":"Cause somebody did say"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1807.4109999999998,"endTime":1809.511,"body":"something like that and left a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1809.511,"endTime":1811.9109999999998,"body":"review and genuinely did make"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1811.951,"endTime":1812.331,"body":"it really"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1813.261,"endTime":1814.791,"body":"cuz you know,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1813.261,"endTime":1814.791,"body":"that people are listening."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1815.011,"endTime":1817.201,"body":"It really does make a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1815.011,"endTime":1817.201,"body":"difference to know that that"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1817.201,"endTime":1818.791,"body":"people are listening and"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1817.201,"endTime":1818.791,"body":"they're like what we do."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1819.091,"endTime":1822.781,"body":"And also if you leave a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1819.091,"endTime":1822.781,"body":"review, click the five"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1822.7859999999998,"endTime":1824.3709999999999,"body":"star button, uh, then."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1824.9109999999998,"endTime":1827.221,"body":"Other people are more likely"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1824.9109999999998,"endTime":1827.221,"body":"to find it and listen as well."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1827.281,"endTime":1831.421,"body":"And, you know, we, we, we pay"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1827.281,"endTime":1831.421,"body":"to put this podcast out, but"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1831.421,"endTime":1836.1309999999999,"body":"it costs the same, whether"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1831.421,"endTime":1836.1309999999999,"body":"there's 500 people listening"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1836.1309999999999,"endTime":1839.671,"body":"or 5,000 people listening,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1836.1309999999999,"endTime":1839.671,"body":"maybe 5 million, we might get"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1839.676,"endTime":1843.6009999999999,"body":"asked by our host to increase"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1839.676,"endTime":1843.6009999999999,"body":"the fees, but it, it doesn't"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1843.6009999999999,"endTime":1847.201,"body":"cost as any extra to have more"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1843.6009999999999,"endTime":1847.201,"body":"listeners, but it could make"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1847.201,"endTime":1848.671,"body":"a difference to somebody else."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1849.556,"endTime":1850.906,"body":"And I think that's"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1849.556,"endTime":1850.906,"body":"worth sharing."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1850.936,"endTime":1852.886,"body":"So feel free to share, follow."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1852.886,"endTime":1854.356,"body":"You can follow me"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1852.886,"endTime":1854.356,"body":"on social media."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1854.416,"endTime":1856.5159999999998,"body":"If you see the stuff"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1854.416,"endTime":1856.5159999999998,"body":"that I share out there."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1856.5159999999998,"endTime":1858.916,"body":"Cause I've got little clips"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1856.5159999999998,"endTime":1858.916,"body":"of this, edit, edited a"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1858.921,"endTime":1860.716,"body":"little bit out the middle,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1858.921,"endTime":1860.716,"body":"sort of two minutes of it."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1860.806,"endTime":1861.2859999999998,"body":"And I put it on"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1861.751,"endTime":1862.531,"body":"didn't know you did"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1862.531,"endTime":1862.831,"body":"that."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1863.011,"endTime":1863.281,"body":"Oh"},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1863.8509999999999,"endTime":1864.991,"body":"have clever of you."},{"speaker":"Fiona","startTime":1865.3509999999999,"endTime":1866.311,"body":"I don't do anything."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1866.4959999999999,"endTime":1868.5059999999999,"body":"Yeah, well,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1866.4959999999999,"endTime":1868.5059999999999,"body":"I'm a, I'm a bit nerdy."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1868.5059999999999,"endTime":1869.316,"body":"I'm a bit geeky."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1869.5259999999998,"endTime":1871.2359999999999,"body":"I like playing around"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1869.5259999999998,"endTime":1871.2359999999999,"body":"with stuff like this."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1871.716,"endTime":1873.846,"body":"And, and so, yeah, I'll"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1871.716,"endTime":1873.846,"body":"sit with some software"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1873.846,"endTime":1875.2559999999999,"body":"and add some subtitles on."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1875.356,"endTime":1876.5259999999998,"body":"The links are in"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1875.356,"endTime":1876.5259999999998,"body":"the show notes."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1876.5259999999998,"endTime":1878.446,"body":"If you'd like to follow"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1876.5259999999998,"endTime":1878.446,"body":"me and you can catch up"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1878.446,"endTime":1881.896,"body":"on what I'm doing over the"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1878.446,"endTime":1881.896,"body":"next couple of days, if you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1881.896,"endTime":1884.206,"body":"wanted to my silly little"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1881.896,"endTime":1884.206,"body":"postings and ramblings"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1886.33,"endTime":1888.97,"body":"Well, everybody, if you"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1886.33,"endTime":1888.97,"body":"want us, you know where to"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1888.97,"endTime":1892.1799999999998,"body":"find us, please submit some"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1888.97,"endTime":1892.1799999999998,"body":"questions or some topic ideas."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1892.1799999999998,"endTime":1895.3999999999999,"body":"If there are some nattering"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1892.1799999999998,"endTime":1895.3999999999999,"body":"that you'd like us to natter"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1895.4199999999998,"endTime":1899.05,"body":"about, feel free to give"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1895.4199999999998,"endTime":1899.05,"body":"us a subject and believe"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1899.05,"endTime":1900.82,"body":"me, we turn the mic live"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1899.05,"endTime":1900.82,"body":"and you can't shut us up."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1901.4199999999998,"endTime":1903.01,"body":"Well, me particularly,"},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1901.4199999999998,"endTime":1903.01,"body":"it seems."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1904.75,"endTime":1906.25,"body":"Have a great week pod fans."},{"speaker":"Richard","startTime":1906.34,"endTime":1906.76,"body":"Bye for now."}]}