What Happened To Aubrey Dameron?

25-year-old Aubrey Dameron was last seen in Grove, Oklahoma on March 9, 2019.  She disappeared after leaving her family home to meet up with someone.  Chris discusses potential motives and suspects in this fairly recent missing persons case.  

Transcript

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People just want to know what it's like to be me. How does it feel to see a dead body? Tell a family their loved one has been murdered, talk to a rape victim, catch a killer, and get them to confess, hold on tight, my friends, get ready for the journey. And welcome to murder with Mannina. Hello, everyone, and welcome to another edition of murder with mannina. Before we get started on this case, I gotta tell you, I just participated and got certified in teaching an active shooter training. So pretty excited about that. That's fast. Yeah, it's fantastic. Yeah, I might go over it. Some I might do an episode on it, right, because it's something that we can absolutely talk about. But it gets your brain moving. It's a it's a newer version of RUN, HIDE fight, which I don't love. But this version kind of gives you a little bit more options of things to think about. So anyways, maybe I'll do an episode if people are interested. That's a great idea. Yeah, we could do an episode on it. So and I like it. That's a great idea. Yeah, that could help a lot of people. I have a friend that went into a grocery store late at night, and it was being held up. And the and they turned the guns on her. And she had learned somewhere always to run in a zigzag if someone's shooting at you. And she did and they did shoot at her, but they missed Oh, yeah. And she survived. Yeah. Oh, okay. Good. Yeah, that this exact thing is a real thing. And that's actually talked about in this training. So if you're interested, you know, we'll do it. We'll do an episode on it. I think that's a great idea for us definitely do it. All right. Well, today we're going to talk about a missing person. And she's been missing for nearly Well, let's see 2004 days. And her name was this is a really interesting case, there's kind of a lot of dynamics, you think it's something obvious, and then it kind of twists and turns a little bit. So there's a lot of different people who could have different motives. So let's take it let's take a crack at this and get it out. So her name was Aubrey Damron. And she's been missing since March 19 of 2009. So in August of 2018, she moved back to Oklahoma and she's Native American. That's, that's, that's important. But she's Native American. So anyway, she moved back to Oklahoma, or I'm sorry, she moved back from Oklahoma after she moved to New Mexico with her boyfriend. And his name is Jay Pearson. And according to him, she had decided to to move back home to seek treatment for alcohol and drug abuse. Okay, so there's one indicator of a motive always, when we talk about, you know, alcohol and drug abuse, okay. But she told her aunt Pam, who she was real close with, that she was afraid of him. Smith mentioned that Audrey told her that her boyfriend threatened to kill her if she were to leave him. So and those are Oh, yeah. Wow. First big Well, I mean, he Yeah. So it's interesting when I did work in domestic violence, you know, they don't mess around. If they say they're going to kill you. And you stay long enough, they probably will. Because think about the arguments that you've gotten in to with your, you know, significant other or whatever. Very rarely, if ever, do people say I'm going to kill you. So it's, it's not so you might feel like that in the moment. But as far as actually like saying those words, it's not really, really common. And so when they do say it, you have to believe them. They may not do it that day, when they say, but more, nine times out of 10 if they are threatening to kill you. They will. It's a real, they have it in other words they have because think about that's that's just not something that you can say easily. So anyways, okay, so on the morning of March

9 2019, around 3: 3:59

30am. And that's always suspect right the time of day, but 330 in the morning, she leaves her mother's house in Oklahoma, and she's supposedly trying to meet someone. She had messaged several people on Facebook asking for a ride before she left, but it's still not known whether someone picked her up or not. She was really, really big on social media. So 330 in the morning, just what we know right now domestic situations and possible drug and alcohol abuse. Right, we're painting the picture, which is always what I like to do when we're covering cold cases. Her phone though,

was last ping that 3: 4:36

42am And she was close to her home. And then she's literally not been heard or seen from since. So she's paying close to home. She's also considered to be at risk and this is another important thing because she suffers from epilepsy and requires anti seizure medication, along with a other prescription medications what she had left at home that morning. So wasn't necessarily planning to be gone leave. She wanted to leave but rarely. Okay, so she and this is another thing that supports she was last seen wearing all black she don't own a black jacket, top skirt, tights and boots. She was 25 years old and is described as being five to five foot 10 tall on weighing around 150 pounds. She also has brown hair and brown eyes and has multiple tattoos and tattoo on her backside of her neck, a circular design tattoo with a word shorty on her left shoulder and tattoos on both hips. And those are always obviously really, really important if they were to find a body tattoos are fantastic. And help with identification. Okay, so let's just get down to the nitty gritty, August night, or August 18 of 2018. She moves back to Oklahoma, like I said, she had said that she was scared of her boyfriend and told her aunt that he had threatened to kill her. Okay, December of 2018, just a few months later, the communication with her family decreases. And that's another indicator of domestic violence, right? And we talked a little bit about that. So she was really very Social Savvy. And she always communicated via, you know, Facebook or whatever. So communication decreases with her family. And that's always a clue me. And that's like, if you you know, people that are always in contact and they stop, something is up. Okay. She constantly uses social media accounts. She's always in contact with her family members and friends, literally every day. But in December, it started to stop and her media presence starts slowing, and it stops altogether. All right. So now we jumped to February, an altercation takes place between her and her stepfather. I guess it was so bad that the stepfather filed charges of assault and battery against her, but they were dropped just a few days later. Not a lot of specifics of what that is, but we'll be able to maybe have an idea towards the end of this. So February 25, was her last post on Facebook, she posts for the last time on her Facebook account. And what she shares is an image of a chalkboard. That states you're never too important to be nice to people. Last thing she put on her Facebook, right into February now we're into March March 9. She's last seen leaving her family's home before she leaves. Like I said before she messages a bunch of people on Facebook looking for a ride. According to her mother. She's planning on meeting someone that night, but it's not known whether anyone picks her up. She her mother tells please that she came into the living room where her mother and brother were and informs them that she is going to meet a friend. It happens around 330 In the morning, and then she leaves her home without her purse or important medic medication. So what's interesting to me about that is everybody's up at 330 in the morning, I was just gonna say that's the most Yeah, it's like, Hey, I'm gonna leave and they're like, Okay, that's a little, that's a little weird, but whatever. Okay, so. And you're sure it was 330 in the morning and not 330 3:30am. And then of course, I mentioned her Her phone is pinging at 342. So just about 12 minutes after she physically leaves the house. Her phone is pinged. And they live in a mobile Park home to I don't know if I mentioned that. All right. So a couple days later, she's reported missing now to two days later. So that's, that's a little thing that's a little bit concerning. And I would love to get in touch with the family. Just to talk a little bit about that, because she obviously lives with her mom and stepdad. And she's very social, and, you know, all of those things and for her not to come home for two days. You know, I don't know, with the whole alleged, you know, trying to get help for drugs. I mean, she may have a routine of, you know, being gone for a couple days, but that's a that's a red flag for me. Okay, so but they do report her missing to The Delaware County Sheriff's Department. Right again, that's two days later. Strange. So March 12, a woman calls Audrey's ex boyfriend J, with false information on Audrey's whereabouts. Like here's another twist. Really the Yeah, the waters keep getting Meteor so an unknown woman who claims to be apres friend calls the boyfriend and tells him that she's being held against her will and catch him Oklahoma for drug money. She owes someone that that kind of sounds like that could be reliable, right just based on a little bit of history we know. But she continues to explain that Aubrey will be real least when the debt is paid, and if they are not paid, she will be killed. When Investigators questioned her, they quickly learned that the claim is a hoax. And she is arrested and subsequently charged with extortion. Okay, that's like strange. It's like crazy strange. Yes, I tracked a string. Yeah. So that was March 12. Now we're jumping to march 23. And there's a search conducted near her home because there's a bloody sock that is found. So a search team with Oklahoma City metro and rescue team conducts a search in a heavily wooded area near the near her home, the search leads to discover the bloody sock, approximately half a mile from our home. The sock is submitted to the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigations for forensic testing. And according to Arby's, and they did not receive any conclusive results from this piece of potential evidence, which couldn't match her blood. That's I don't love that, but that's what's being said. Okay. Hmm. So, yeah, hard, hard to understand how they couldn't just know if it was a blood or exactly. So then the family, you know, they start a Facebook page. It's created by our family members to help raise you know, awareness which this seems to be really, really popular these these Facebook pages. So, in April, Mom claims that Aubrey its former boyfriend told her that he killed her. That's what mom says. What were the details surrounding that, according to a probable cause affidavit obvious and alleges that J The former boyfriend told Jennifer Andres mother that he had killed her. There's no evidence linking J to Andres disappearance, so he was never arrested. They have no evidence linking at all, which other than the aunt said he told the mom that isn't even direct. Right. But I mean, you have to look at him right because there's Cora obviously you threatened to kill her. But evidently there is nothing to link other than the threat which could be huge. Suddenly, he and she went she left she didn't say I'm meeting J or I met she just said I'm meeting some right. Right and her family at 330 in the morning. Didn't ask her who? Well and where are you going at 330? Why and why. So we jumped to May in an area in Kenwood, Oklahoma. There's a search done over Memorial Day weekend and the following weekend after officials receive a tip, claiming that Aubrey was buried in the area. During the search a shallow grave was found next to a black leather jacket. Now remember, in the description earlier, she was wearing a black jacket. Nothing else was found during the search and the jacket is sent off to the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation for forensic testing. Upon testing the results for the jacket came back as inconclusive as to whether it belonged to Audrey. But my question right there is show a picture of it to the family. Right. Right. Exactly. Okay. And again, wouldn't there be some DNA on there that they could leave? Absolutely, because there would be like, she lived at that house. So go and get a brush. Go get a toothbrush or something? It's not that exactly. There's probably hair on her jacket if it's her jacket, right. May 27 The family holds a rally not only for Aubrey, but also for a couple other people that were missing in the area. So the family is really big. They're doing Facebook they're doing rallies are really really keeping this alive. And who were the other people were they similar profiles? Yes. Well, yes. And I'll get to that later. Hold please. Okay, so November now we jumped from that's in May, and then we jumped to November and a pond in Delaware Canary searched, so after police receive it promising lead, they drain this pond by three feet and skim the pond and search for her or any of her belongings. According to family members. The search is conducted after dogs alerted them to the pond. Several items were found during search clued in an old fashioned old flashlight fishing reel in a plastic bag, but nothing was related to her disappearance. So I feel like the police are you know, they're getting tips and they're getting leads and they're following through at least it appears that sounds like it. Yeah, but family doesn't feel that way as this goes on. So they do hold a vigil every year. They did it in 2020 for the one year. And the vigil is attended by family members, friends and community members to honor and remember her. Again. They're doing a lot now we're jumping into 2021. So the Aubrey alert bill or House Bill 7090 is introduced to the Oklahoma legislature which calls for missing adult alerts in Oklahoma and brings more urgency when adult goes missing. The bill, if passed, will notify members of the public of a critically missing adult when adult is considered endangered Missy. Right. And she would be considered that because of all of her medical conditions and the fact that she, you know, left her medication behind so that the Aubrey alert bill is introduced okay in January. Okay. All right. But in February 2021, the bill is renamed the Casey alert. And this is why do to operate Aubree being transgender being a transgender woman. Right. Why are you back is immediately given by the House Public Safety Committee explaining that they absolutely would not support the bill being renamed for a transgender person. According to Pam, her aunt, because of this, this bill is renamed the Casey alert for Casey Russell, a man who disappeared from a casino in Seminole, Oklahoma in July of 2016. That's introduced in February. Casey alert is passed in April 24 of 2023. So not very long ago. This has passed and I love that because we have, you know, we have it for children, but we don't have anything for adults. We have Silver Alert for older people that maybe walk away from homes and have dementia and that type of stuff. But there's nothing for endangered adults, which makes it you know, right and right. So why is it called? I'm a little bit confused to clarify. Because why is it called was Aubrey transgender? Yeah. Oh, yes. Not totally wiped out until No, I did that intentionally. Okay. Right. Just to get that effect. Thank you. Thank you for playing along. Okay. So not only was she was she Native American Indian, but yeah, he used to be. She was born Yeah. Male or who knows? Maybe, intersex? We don't know. There we go. So now we've got the motive of the boyfriend. We have all these weird people that are saying things. She's Native American. She's transgender. Now you have to look at the motive of possible hate crime, right. Yeah. Sadly, yeah. Right. It could have been it could have been a history though. Because that drug culture? Yeah. I mean, were her parents doing drugs, I wonder, because why was everyone up at 330 in the morning? And if she wasn't going out at 330 in the morning for drugs, was it? You know, did she have to sleep with people on the side that I mean, we just don't know that much about her life, or her lifestyle, or the culture. So here's a no so little. Right. So here's a little bit of history, though, about the whole transgender thing. So Audrey had an uncle, who was just six months older than her. But they were raised together like siblings, so they were more like brothers. So she was born a boy. So as they were growing up, and they were really, really tied in siblings, they both preferred dolls to trucks as they were playing. Okay. They did eventually, they were so close. So they did eventually come out to each other as T It's nice. They had each other. Yeah. So her uncle said that when she told her family, she was transgender. There was a huge weight lifted from her. Right, which finally came out a huge, huge weight lifted, and that's all great. The family, it's taken them a while. Right? She posted on social media out she you know how she was coming out and also proud of her native American background. So we talked a little bit before about her big social media presence and her Facebook. So she just dove right in and said, Look, I'm transgender now. I'm a very, very proud Native American. And from what I can tell, that's not you know, a great thing to do not that part of the world, sadly, not in that part of the world. Yes. So there had been, she was not received well, obviously, by our community. There had been a lot of slurs, and there had been a lot of chasing a vehicle so they would see her walking and they would start yelling at her and chase her down in vehicles with with threats that harm her or why would for example, yeah, yeah, sad. Absolutely. Because she decided to do you know, this whole media blitz in her world, a media blitz, and so people were just not good with it. So anyways, some family members said that her mom Brother, we're not interested in looking for her. Oh, that's so so that also adds a lot to the tapestry. Right. So when I go back and I look, it's like those vigils, there were some family members, and there were some friends. But according to, you know, one family member that mom and brother, we're not interested in all looking for her. So we have all of these dynamics, right? Like, in domestic violence, it was just so easy. I don't want to say easy, but like, you knew who it was right it like, and that's why I can only take it for about a year, because, you know, I've said it before, the challenge isn't trying to figure out who did it the challenges is trying to convince the victim to follow through, right, along with all of the other precautions that you have to take with the victim, because you're telling them please show up for court, please testify. And then also, you've got to give them precautions about well, that's gonna put you in more harm and telling them you need to leave. And of course, when they finally decide to leave, that's when it's the most dangerous, you know, time for victims of domestic violence when they finally decide to leave. So there's just this whole gigantic dynamic with it, right? And then with this, her be a Native American and transgender. It's like, wow, where do you even start? You know, you've got to go, but you've got to go down both roads. I mean, at first, it's like, oh, well, he killed he threatened to kill her. She was scared. She told people she was scared. Okay, that's great. But obviously, from what I can tell the police department now, to me, just based on what I could tell, they did a pretty good job. But if you dig a little bit deeper into it, the family wasn't really happy with the way that the police did it. And of course, they said, well, it was because of her history with drugs, or well, it was because of her, you know, now she's transgender. But there was some quotes that I found from the sheriff's department and said that no, we we investigated it, as you know, just as much as we investigate any other case, you never really know. I mean, I think you hear it every single time when families are living in this nightmare of hell of not being able to find their loved ones, and knowing probably that they're dead, that they gotta blame somebody, right? In the police. It's the easiest people. You know, they didn't do their job. They didn't find my loved one, you know, there's no answers and all that. But the FBI eventually got, you know, involved in it. And the Cherokee, they have a Cherokee Nation Marshal Service. And now they're involved in it. And hopefully that will help with that. Because, right, so it just, it's just so hard. But statistics, Native Americans, rates of violence are 10 times higher than the national average, just the Native America. Well, I know one thing, but I do know one thing about that culture and alcoholism and that culture is rampid. Yeah. Right. Right. So that's just interesting. But hopefully, you know, with the marshals in the FBI jumping on it, that they'll get, they'll do a deep dive. And, you know, of course, I'll be asked, What would I do? I would totally just go back and start with the family, just to very basic questions, like, why would she leave at 330? In the morning? Did anybody ask where she was? Like, very, very basic stuff? Right? Why were you awake at 330? In the morning? Just, you know? Right? Yeah, all of that stuff. And you know, and then of course, you've got to just dig down deeper with the boyfriend and, and find out, you know more about that. But I mean, there were some people that really, you know, cared about her and loved her. And, you know, the fact that she finally felt comfortable to come out. And then it's like, one of those things, I feel like she came out and she came out big, not only to our family, but social media, Facebook, all of that stuff. And, you know, you got to ask the question, Is that why she got, you know, is that how she got killed? So, just, it's really sad. I mean, it's obviously more there are more suspects than just the boyfriend because of the the reaction of the community people try, you know, chasing her down, you know, calling her names and this and that. Well, and I think, I think too, that there could be there could be a motive with the whole drug thing. Obviously the or that could be drug related. It could be your boyfriend or it could just be hate crime. Yeah. And the woman that called and did the hoax and I mean, it's very, I mean, it's very likely that maybe she did oh, some people some drugs and maybe this woman thought will fuck, they'll pay, you know what I mean? Maybe they'll pay so she just tried it and just ended up right. That just seems like a completely, you know, that just seems like a parallel incident to the case. Not really connected at all. Just yeah, like somebody somebody's trying to exploit the situation. Absolutely. So she must have been, you know, pretty well known for, you know, being in that lifestyle, but also well known to, you know, to try to try to fix it to right because she had gone away to try to get help. So I just wanted to bring a little bit of covers to this. So it's an interesting case, because there's just a lot of dynamics to it. But in but and also, there's Christmas, this whole part of it that we don't know which your signature way of investigating crimes is to get the story behind the story. And you always ask everybody's backstory and the family's backstory. And that would add so much to it. Yeah, to just to understand, like, okay, so she made some strange choices, it's easy to judge her. But if we know her backstory, and the way she was raised, we know a little bit. Her family was up at 330 in the morning, and didn't ask her who she was going to meet, or why she was going out at 330. In the morning, that gives us a little bit of, well, I mean, if someone were to parachute me down into her neighborhood, and I parachuted into mom and dad's living room, you know, we'd have a lot more compassion for the the decision she was making in this situation, she found herself that way. And we therefore have a lot more compassion. Well, we're not that we don't have compassion. But other people might have more compassion for the fact that she's well, and that too, like, so people always ask, like, what would you do? And you would think I would just, you know, go up and go, Okay, what do you what do you think happened? Or what do you know? And it's not, I wouldn't even do that for a long time, I would do exactly what you said, which is, just get to know, the family before you start even in asking investigative questions, it is so important to, to try to get a report and you can't just dive in with what do you think happened? I like to ask that question. But I like to ask it after I'd developed a relationship, because the answer is a lot longer. And it's a lot more intimate. And it's a lot more detail oriented, if I've already established that. So it's really kind of a slow process. Right? You know, if I were to, like I said, Be parachuted down, it would be a slow process of just trying to develop relationships with her family, with her friends, look at every social media thing, you know, and just, you know, just keep working it and talking Don't Don't be rushed about it, just, you know, because it's, she's gone. Right? And she's probably dead more than likely dead, if not been killed? Well, because of the not having rides on me would be absolutely, but so it can be a slow process to really, really try to paint the picture to, you know, put you in the right direction. I mean, it's great when people call in with tips, and they say, Hey, she's, she's in this pond, and they and they do what they need to do, that's great. But when they get cold like this, and it's been a few years, you really just have to work at slow. So, you know, for that question that I'm asked so many times, just there's no rush. And that was something that I learned to, you know, when I arrived in homicide scenes, like you're such an adrenaline high, and everything's so fast, right? You're trying to get to the scene fast and, and trying to get it solved fast, because you're worried that if you don't get everything really, really quickly, you're gonna lose it. And I just remember being told, slow down, like slow it down. And just because you'll miss stuff going fast in this, you can even be slower, right? Because it's all right there. Again, it's always all right there. It's just are you going to catch it or not? So if anybody has any information on this case, you can call one 800 Call FBI. Simple like that one 800 Call FBI or you can call the Cherokee Nation Marshal Service at 918207 3800. Again, we appreciate please pass this along to your friends and family our podcasts rate and review and we will see you next time on murder with Mannina. If you have a cold case you'd like Chris to review submitted through our website at murder with mannina.com and follow us on Instagram and Facebook at murder with mannina and Twitter at murder W mannina. We'll be back next week with a brand new episode of murder with mannina.