Do You Have a Late Talker? Don't Be Fooled!

What makes a Late Talker?

Can we determine who will "grow out of it" and who will not?

Are you asking, "When should you seek advice?"

Many parents (and professionals) misread their toddler simply because they don't know what to look for - you don't know what you don't know!

He's an active boy! He's stubborn! She's shy or apprehensive.

OK, that might be true, but we still expect speech by their second birthday.

Yes, there's a range, but don't be fooled into thinking "all kids figure it out."

In this episode, we cover all those questions and more.  I break down the TRUE definition of a Late Talker - what criteria to look for AND what other behaviors (or lack there of) help shape the health and well-being of your beautiful child.

More importantly, I provide a list of "Risk Factors" that will help you determine your next best steps... you can find them by clicking HERE.

Share with your friends and family and help me reach more new parents just like yourself. Help me connect with new moms and build content that is important to YOU!

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www.HyerLearning.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:04

Hello and welcome to Talking Toddlers, where I share more than just tips and tricks on how to reduce tantrums or build your toddlers' vocabulary. We're going to cover all of that, I assure you. But here, our goal is to develop clarity because in this modern world, it's truly overwhelming. Especially during these past two years. This podcast is about empowering moms to know the difference between fact and fiction, to never give up, to tap into everyday activities so your child stays on track. He's not falling behind, he's thriving through your guidance. We know that true learning starts at home. And Talking Toddlers, this podcast helps you develop that with clarity, confidence, and clear communication. So let's get started. Hello and welcome back to Talking Toddlers. I'm Erin Heyer, your host, and I'm here to say you've been lied to. Sorry, I don't think people or systems are lying to you on purpose, or at least not in the beginning. I think that we as a society want to calm new moms, new dads, new grandparents worry. Calm and just enjoy these precious few years. We also believe that kids are resilient and that they all kind of grow at their own pace. But this week's episode is really focused on kind of this overgeneralization of a term that's man-made, it's not part of my specialization. It's called the late talker. And you may or may not have heard of this, but I don't want you to be fooled. If you have a baby or a toddler and you've heard this term, I want to be very explicit in this episode of what that implies and what it's not directed at. So let me give you the definition. So a late talker, which is not a diagnosis, by the way, it is kind of this um social term that people just throw about, is a child who isn't using at least 50 words or any spontaneous two-word combinations by 24 months of age when there are no other diagnosed disabilities or developmental delays. And that would cross areas of sensory processing, cognitive skills, or your intellect and thinking abilities, and motor areas. So we have to look at that whole definition as a package, right? So a child who isn't using at least 50 words or any spontaneous two-word combinations by 24 months when there are no other complications. That's the key. So let's jump right in and look at breaking apart that definition and how can you, as a new mom, a new dad, new grandparents, really apply that as you're playing with your child and helping them and guiding them and being the best parent you can be, right? Because here's a word of caution. We, as human beings, tend to make these sweeping generalizations. We also tend to kind of interchange terms loosely when there is a specific reason why we use the word speech versus the word language. And I think it was back in episode 16 where I talked about what's the difference between speech and language. So you can go back and listen to that. I'll cover a little bit on that today. But I think unfortunately, many parents and professionals misread toddlers simply because they don't know what you're looking for, right? You we don't know what we don't know. So you might look at your toddler and think he's just an active boy. He's he's physical, he doesn't have time or is too busy, he's too intricated in moving and jumping and in gross motor skills. He doesn't have time to listen or talk or settle down. Uh, you know, and I still hear pediatricians today say, oh, boys develop differently. Yes and no. Boys are, they kind of beat to a different drum, they kind of have a different rhythm or temperament most of the time. Yes, these are sweeping generalizations, but most of the time. But, and I've said this over and over and over again, we don't have different normative expectations between the boys and the girls, right? We understand that we kind of process uh have a different style that's different, but that 50 words at two years of age and two word combinations, we expect boys to do that. That's the bare minimum. 50 words is the low average range, that would be the 25th percentile. Where if you have 200 words or 400 words, that would be the 75th percentile to the 90th percentile. So there is a big range, but we need 50 words. We need them to start putting words together with intention, and I'll explain what that means. And pediatricians are just as guilty at making some of these sweeping generalizations too. Again, I think the intention is to calm your worry, and they do believe, and it's true, that the vast majority of little kids are very resilient, but that doesn't mean that we just overlook these things. There's also, and I think this is gonna have to have its own episode, but there's this phrase that's also being used as Einstein syndrome, and it was coined by a wonderful, you know, uh researcher and economist, actually, Thomas Sowell, who did his own research when his boy, who is now I think in his 40s, but when his boy was four years of age and he was a late quote unquote late talker. But everything else seemed to be developing right on par. So he fell into this group of children who were developing verbal communication at a slower rate. And we're gonna talk about what is speech, what is language, and what are social skills and how you, mom and dad, can really gather this information and think about it as you know go about your day and help your child learn everything from eating to talking to listening to playing to rolling over. So let me break it down so you understand what these two criteria with the 50-word minimum and the two-word utterances. The 50-word benchmark is very, very, very important in language development because research has told us over and over and over again that kids who have at least 50 words have learned enough single words to begin to put them together to make their own little phrases. See how they're coming together, right? And if you go back and listen to my podcast on what's the difference between speech and language, speech is the physical part of talking, it's how we move our air through our whole vocal system that we have 26 muscles from our diaphragm up to coordinate. It's much more than just the sounds coming out of our mouth, right? But we have the development of jaw and lips and tongue and airflow, inhalation and exhalation. But that's the physical part of talking, that's speech. And even though we have 26 letters in our alphabet, English has 44 sounds in order to, you know, produce speech and and have a conversation, right? So those 44 sounds are made. So you have example S that it can say shs, and then you have the H that says huh, but you put them together and it says shh, that's a different sound, right? And then you can even turn that into that was voiceless, shh. There's no vibration in my vocal area. But if you turn on your voice and say, like in the word pleasure or beige, then that's the same motor movement in my mouth, right? My lips are kind of rounded, like the shh sh shh sound. My jaw is high, my my tongue is high and spread out on the sides. These are all physical actions necessary to produce speech. And that, and then I can turn my voice on or off. Another physical action, all of that beautiful coordination, that's speech, that's the physical part of talking. Language is when we put those physical actions together to formulate a word like cup or puppy or cookie, right? We're putting different physical actions and stringing those sounds together to create a word, and that word represents a thing or an action or a feeling, a desire, an emotion, all of those things. So that's why it's really important that when we look at a two-year-old, that the 50-word benchmark represents that they've acquired enough physical ability to produce speech sounds, and that they're cognitively aware that you we, if we put them, these speech sounds in a specific order, we actually say a word and we could get something, or we could, you know, have fun with somebody else, or we could just share a desire, right? So that language, vocabulary, sentences, all of that is also broken up in two different areas. What I'm doing right here is I'm producing or expressing in a language format, and then you listeners are receiving and trying to understand and follow the dialogue, right? So by 24 months of age, if we know if a child has at least 50 words, that then they can begin to put those single words together and express meaning. And that's why we encourage you as the mom and the dad and the caretakers to model and shape both nouns and verbs, as well as adjectives, right? But the whole idea is that they have not just nouns, but they they're putting these nouns and action words or verbs together, you know, like eat cookie, boy, jump, car fast, right? That's an adjective. Um, but so you can see how they're understanding their cognition, they're thinking with language, which are real words and real thoughts, those concept building, right? The puppy is under the table, right? Um, the boy is sick, he has a tummy ache or his headaches, you know, and putting these concepts together, that it's not just rote labeling or counting or what's this, what's this, what's that, what's this? That's not real communication, that's acquiring a list of vocabulary words, and that's important, but they have to have purpose and meaning behind it. So with that, now let me break down the second part. Why is spontaneous two word combinations, why is that part of this definition of a late talker or a criteria, right? Like I said, they aren't just imitating phrases, they're mixing and matching words in real time on their own, right? They're not just imitating after you. They'll do a we want them to imitate, you know, because that's that's a way of practicing, but it's also a way of giving it back to you. And that's that social communication, that diet, that give and take, that reciprocity, that mama said something, and I can say the same thing, and that's confirmation. Like when you say, Oh, do you want to go to the park? Go to the park, instead of him being able to say, Yes, I can't wait to go to the park and see Johnny and go down the slide and see Susie and play in the in the sandbox. He can't say all of that, but he can model or imitate what you said as a means of communication to say, yes, let's go to the park. I can't wait. That's awesome. So we want these spontaneous two word combinations because that is letting us know, giving us inside scoop, that they're not just memorized chunks, right? He's not quoting a movie scene or he hasn't memorized a line from a book, that he is thinking about how to interact in this world because for the last 24 months, you, as mom and dad, and grandparent and family members and anybody else who's been loving on him, has been pruning his auditory system, mapping your natural language and giving him opportunity to understand the patterns. How do I put these sounds in a certain pattern in a sequence to make up words? And then how do I put these words in a certain sequence to make a phrase or a sentence or a request or a or a defense of something? No, I don't want to go to bed, right? So one caveat is also important for parents to understand, and I I have to say this to almost every parent I um get the blessing of working with, is that holistic phrases don't count as a two-word combination. And what that means are phrases that we that the child, your child, will hear as a whole unit, like I did it, ta-da, I did it. Uh, you and I, as grown-ups, understand that I did it are three separate words. But he or she has heard that so many times to them, that's a whole unit. That's one word, right? Perhaps it's like a comp a compound word, like cupcake or baseball, right? Um, or words like, what's that? That's a or social phrases like, oh, thank you, or all done. Those don't count as spontaneous two-word combinations, they're holistic or one-word in concept, right? And so just keep that in mind as you're playing with your kids and you're really trying to analyze and gather data, because that's what you do, that um that it's important that when these spontaneous two-word combinations start to blossom, that it's not a social phrase and or a holistic unit, right? And as I think about it, let me go down this little tunnel. It's not a real rabbit hole, but let me give you a little science or neuroscience and language development so you understand why that's important, why those holistic words or all gone or thank you are not considered at this stage two separate words. Because, like I said, you for the last 24 months have been coding speech and language. The his or her, your beautiful child's brain is wiring and those neurons are coming together and finding patterns and developing pathways, right, to your spoken language. They hear something, they practice, they do a lot of vocal play, a lot of approximations. They're putting these patterns together. And that's part of the coding of word structures. Like I said, you put these certain sounds that are physical entities of moving my articulators in a certain order to create certain words, right? One of the reasons, one of the primary reasons why this is really, really, really, really, really important, because we're building that auditory pathway, the auditory cortex, how the brain hears all of the spoken language and then builds a system out of it, right? And just a side note, primarily between birth and somewhere around their 11th birthday, but they have a right ear dominance for spoken language because it goes in that right ear and it gets mapped on the is cross-ipsilateral, right? It crosses the hemisphere and it codes language, words, vocabulary, structure, all of that, and the left hemisphere. It's not that they're not using their their right hemisphere, they are. Remember, I said that's a brain myth that you know we have a hemispheric, we do have a hemispheric dominance, but it doesn't compartmentalize that easily. And we use all of the brain all of the time, right? It's it's kind of this this network system within a system, within a system. But it's really, really important just to kind of pocket this idea in the back of your head as a new mom or new dad, because you're coding spoken sounds and words much, much later on, that will help them break the code to literacy, to reading. When they're four or five years of age, and we start to then look at some of those pre-literacy skills. We will ask them, oh, how many words do you hear in this sentence? The cat is black, and they have to count out the words. I would say it a little bit more smoother. I would say the cat is black. Can they auditorily process and understand where one word ends and the other word, the next word begins? That's that word structure that we talk about. And then they have to then have enough auditory strength and flexibility to then decode or segment how many sounds do you hear when I say cat? And I don't say I don't stretch it out in the beginning, I don't say cat. I say how many sounds are in the word cat? And they have to break it down to c at. That is all strengthened, that skill. This is why we say reading and writing literacy is a man-made skill, and it is superimposed, it's built, it's developed on top of spoken language. And that's, you know, a whole nother series of conversations. But I want you as the new mom and the new dad to understand you're building this foundation to auditory processing to speech and language. Speech are the sounds, language are the words, phrases, sentences, structure, all of it, right? So that's why it's really, really important that we understand how this human communication system develops over time. And so when a child is a late talker, one of the things we know, even if they catch up by the time they enter kindergarten, we know that they just end up in a different risk group for reading and writing problems. It does not mean that there's a one-to-one correlation, it just means that they have a higher chance of struggling with breaking that code and learning how to really become a fluent reader. And so that's just a side note, a little tunnel we went down, not a big dark rabbit hole, which I can in the future. So the main point in today's episode, under the auspices of a late talker, is that we look at a minimal of 50 words because we want them to generate or produce spontaneous two-word combinations, letting us know by 24 months of this beautiful world that they're living in that they're beginning to understand spoken language. Um, and I want to include here very clearly that the truest definition of a late talker means that a child does not fall under any other medical diagnosis, doesn't have cerebral palsy, isn't diagnosed with Down syndrome, nor do these children who fall under this umbrella of a late talker, will they be diagnosed with autism, intellectual disabilities, or any kind of specific speech disorder, such as apraxia of speech? Apraxia you may or may not have heard of, but it really means that there is a challenge with the physical part of motor planning, those articulators, the breath inhalation and exhalation, coordinating the voice on and off, the jaw stability and and what we call gradation. Can it open a little bit and then open a lot of it? Um, the coordination of the lips and the jaw, and then the tongue, which is a complicated muscle. It's the only muscle in our mouth that is is has a point of origin. It's attached in the back of our throat, but no point of insertion. There's, you know, think of your bicep where it goes from your elbow to your shoulder. It's attached, right? And it can flex and relax, but the tongue has to stabilize itself, flex and relax in its mouth, you know, against the jaw, against the teeth, against the palate, the roof of the mouth. I bring this up now only because a praxia of speech or a motor speech problem is very different than a quote-unquote late talker. So we have to be very clear with the terms that we use. So let me delineate exactly what a late talker looks like or presents as. It's something that I use as a clean diagnosis. They're approximately 18 to 30 months of age who present with no other issues other than talking or spoken language. That includes attentional problems or behavioral problems such as meltdowns or chronic recurring temper tantrums. They have typically developing language processing skills, they follow directions, they are able to identify pictures when you're sharing a book, they know body parts, they understand routines, they get excited when they see you reach for the dog leash or reach for your car keys. They know and understand what that behavior or gesture means. There are no motor skills issues. They don't have any delays in the motor domain. And there are no social issues. They respond to their name, they interact well with other adults and children. Yes, it's still parallel play, but they're interested in other kids. We're human beings, we're social creatures, they're intrigued. If somebody's over there digging in the sand, they're gonna go over there and explore side by side, but they're interested in being with other children, they tolerate and understand transitions and change. You can explain to them, oh, we can't go to the park today, it's raining. Um, and they begin to really demonstrate around 18 months to 24, 28 months to play with purpose, and it's appropriate for their age. So they're putting play activities together, feeding the baby doll, or growling like the bear. So I know this term, late talker, can be very tricky for many, many new moms, new dads, and professionals out there, because late talking is often the first indicator that your child is not meeting his or her developmental milestones as expected. Not talking is noticeable, it's pretty obvious to the lay person, you know, to Aunt Susie who rarely sees your child, or to you know, even the grocery store clerk who can comment, oh, she can't talk yet. Behaviors do vary quite a bit, you know, the social behavior and the interaction and attention and play. And so that tends to be a little harder to measure or to track. There's a lot more variability. We can kind of rationalize in our head, oh, he or she has this type of personality. You know, they're they're shy, they're reserved, they're quiet, or he's all boy and he just likes climbing. Uh, we can also rationalize where your child perhaps lines up in the family. Maybe you have several children and he's the baby, and you know, the bigger sister talk, quote unquote, talks for him. You can say, oh, you know, he's not a very good sleeper, and that's affecting his mood, and so he doesn't really want to socially or engage or socialize or engage. Um, there might be dietary or stress factors, he's recovering from a cold, or he, you know, just had a stomach virus, all of these things that we can rationalize behaviors to kind of compensate for the lack of verbal expressive skills. You begin to ask yourself questions like, gosh, is it me? Am I not a good enough mom? What am I doing wrong? You know, he or she should, quote unquote, be talking like, you know, the neighbor or your nephew or your niece. So also it's tricky because we as parents, we don't want to jump the gun. We don't want to judge or compare, God forbid, right? That's you know what we all say. Oh, it's it's not fair. But I caution us, we have to compare because the truth is that's how we determine progress. That's how we measure growth and development. And are there issues? If there's an issue, then you know, we step on the scale every morning because we want to see. Where we stand, literally and figuratively. And we need to then determine you know, am I getting better in my exercise or dieting plan? Or does something need to change, right? Everything we do in life, we do compare and judge and measure. We when we train for a marathon or a simple, you know, 10K, when we want to lose weight, when we're recovering from an illness or a broken leg or, you know, a sprained ankle. We measure it. We compare how does my leg feel today compared to yesterday. I mean, I have a jammed up thumb and every day I'm measuring, you know, the range of motion. Am I making progress or am I standing still? When we build a house or plant a garden or raise a dog, we use measurement and tracking to look at our progress. When we learn how to drive a car or take yoga classes or cook or write or anything, we track, we measure, we evaluate, we monitor, or at least we should be doing that if we expect change and growth and progress. So on this subject matter, I want parents when it comes to you know comparing and measuring and tracking to understand that parenting is so much more than just collecting data. It's about becoming attuned with your baby and your toddler. And I have a future episode all about attunement because I think it's that important, especially in this day and age, in this modern society that we live in. Attunement is defined as the reactiveness we have to another person. And it's considered the process by which we form relationships. And the most important relationship we will ever have is with our babies and toddlers and children. Dr. Dan Siegel, a psychiatrist out of UCLA, defines it as this quote, when we attune with others, we allow our own internal state to shift, to come to resonate with the inner world of another human, unquote. So I want to suggest that true parenting, your job with your baby and your toddler and your preschooler really tunes into their presence. Do they truly connect through the eye gaze? It's not eye contact per se, but it's a gaze. Do you feel it when they look into your eyes and they smile? Do you share that experience, whether it's biting into his first apple, or when you pet a dog, or when you crash a tower, does he look at you and wonder, how is she going to react? It made a lot of noise. We worked really hard in creating this tower and it just fell over. Will she laugh? Will she get mad? But there's that connection, that attuning in to the present moment. And you feel connected. It's not verbal, even though we're talking about verbal skills right now, but those are the are the prerequisites that we begin to resonate being in the presence of each other. And that's what true parenting is really about and laying that foundation. And if you haven't already listened to episode two and three, when I started this podcast last May or April, I guess, um, I really talk about the must-haves before the first words. And it's it's really about attunement, engagement, connection. And that's what you need before your beautiful toddler will start using these single words and two, three, four, five-word combinations, right? But it's really about figuring out where they are in this human connection and then build up from there. So back to kind of the classic definition of a late talker, right? Where there's expressive language and speech delay, researchers, with all honesty, have yet to agree upon the explanation of what it is or where it comes from or what's the etiology, the underlying quote-unquote cause. But we have determined a few things in the last 50 years. One, there tends to be a family history of early language delay. There, they also, late talkers, tend to be more male. It's about a four to one ratio. Late talkers also tend to be born less than 85% of their optimal birth weight. So it doesn't necessarily have to be low birth weight, but it could be close to that five-pound mark. Again, these are trends that we see when we really evaluate and look at late talkers. Um, they also tend to be less than 37-week gestations. So again, uh not all premies are late talkers, not all low birth weight kids are late talkers, but these are what we see can put a child in a different risk group. So approximately 13% of two-year-olds at this time, actually, this data comes out of I think 2018-2019, approximately 13% of two-year-olds are considered late talkers. Now, let's quickly talk about no pun intended, um, the the infamous question do late talkers catch up on their own? And the real interesting fact is most people, including pediatricians, kind of tend to run with this. And but there's some facts um that I'll share with you, at least up until, like I said, this data comes out of 2018 and 19, up until COVID. And I think that we might see different ramifications and different data points, but that'll take time to collect, right? That looking at long-term studies and and and outcomes of what's happening to your little baby now when they're one, two, three, four, and five, and the side effects of lockdowns and and social distancing and all of that. But up to this point, the majority of late talkers do quote unquote grow out of it. Okay, so I'm I'm I'm prefacing all of this. About 65 to 70 percent of late talkers do kind of close that gap and walk into their kindergarten year and really present as very capable five or six-year-olds, right? But you flip that data point and you have to realize, okay, well, 30 to 35 percent don't. And that's the tricky part. We don't have any way to predict which child will and will not catch up on their own. We can't differentiate which group your toddler may or may not fall into, and that's the hard part. And and I think it's you know, really speaks to you as the parent need to determine what you're comfortable with and what you're willing to risk or or which path you want to go by. So let me include some risk factors that help us as therapists and developmental specialists tease apart who may or may not continue to have language learning problems. So here's a list, and the final three are the most important. But they're typically, if a child has a history of being quiet as an infant, very little babbling, a history of middle ear infections, that's another risk factor, limited number of consonant sounds. So they have to have different consonant sounds, not just the ma or da-da-da or ga-ga-ga, a wide variety, and they have to be playing with it. Does not link pretend ideas and actions while they're playing, like I said, feeding, you know, the teddy bear or um driving the car up the couch and flipping over, or um, you know, using a block as a telephone, or you know, mixing food and baking it in the oven. And you don't have to have all of these toys per se, but you know, in in my play setting, I can, I don't really have a bake oven, but we use the bottom of the high chair as the oven, and I, you know, make the clicking sound for turning it on, and then we wait. And if a child can do that with me, then I know that social pretend play is developing really, really well, and that's an excellent sign. Um, a child who doesn't imitate or copy words, you know, doesn't imitate after you when you say, you know, cracker, and they say cracker, um, and they want to be able to engage with you, uses mostly nouns. Remember what I said that you need that minimum of 50 words, but in order to put two-word utterances or two word combinations together, you have to have nouns and verbs. They also um have difficulty playing with their peers, so that early socialization, and it's not so much that they're going to, you know, share or take turns when they're two or three, but they're going to be interested in playing side by side and doing similar things in the sandbox or climbing up the slide or taking turns swinging. They want to be in close proximity with other children. Um, a family history, that's key, language or learning, reading, academic challenges, if dad or mom or uncle or auntie or cousins, then that's a piece to the puzzle that we have to consider. Also, mild comprehension delays, understanding, mild. So if it if there's really intermittent with responding to their name, or if they, if you really remove all gestures, like if you typically point to the coat and say, Oh, go get your coat and meet me on the front porch and we'll go, you know, to the market. If you don't use those gestures and you just literally tie your hands behind your back and say, Where's your coat? Can you go get your coat and meet me on the front porch? So that's two steps get your coat and meet me by the front porch. So you really have to, again, step back, be the analyzer. You're collecting data, but you're also being in tune with him. And if he's, you know, in the middle of eating, you know, chocolate ice cream and you ask him, you know, to go get his coat, he's not going to engage with you because he's involved with eating something delicious. So you have to put it in real context too. And then the final one is that they use very few gestures to communicate. And um, I've talked about this before that there's this great, and I'll I'll have a link below, um, uh a great outline of 16 gestures by 16 months. And those last three gestures to communicate, a mild comprehension delay, and then a family history, those three really are high on the list for um, you know, risk factors when I'm looking to tease apart and and determine how how you know risky is it to wait and see? Or what do we need to do? Whether, and and many times when parents come to see me, they might not jump right into therapy. I can give them a list of things to do, monitor at home, kind of increase or or embellish your one-to-one time and your playtime, and then we'll monitor. Call me in three months, call me in six months. Because the truth is these kids grow and develop quickly. So your child three months from now should be strikingly different, and that's important too. So the purpose of this particular episode is to be very clear with what a quote-unquote late talker looks like and what he he doesn't look like, right? When there are other issues involved, then they're not, they don't fall under that umbrella. And my whole goal here in this whole podcast series is for you, mom, mostly, but dads and grandparents and everybody else that are involved in this beautiful child's early growth and development can proceed, parent, advocate, guide with confidence and clarity because there's a lot of confusion out there. And like I said, sweeping generalizations, overused terms. Um, and I I want to give you clarity. So keep this in mind. You, mom, and dad are in charge. Everyone else works for you, and that and I say that to parents all the time: like, if you don't see progress, big progress in the first three months, fire me. I'm not doing my job. I we need to see growth and change. And that includes pediatricians, therapists, teachers, babysitters. No, they work for you. You, mom and dad, determine what's in your child's best interest, what fits and aligns itself with your family values, your family goals and aspirations. Outsiders, professionals, and pseudo-professionals give you their opinion, including me. This is my professional impression. This is what I've learned and experienced in the last 35 years. I've studied this stuff, and then I've applied it in real time with real families. And I can just give you my recommendations. And I've said this thousands of times. You pay me for my opinion. You don't have to take it, you don't have to follow it. You can sit on it for a while and see how it begins to resonate. Or, or, you know, if you want to call me six months from now, that's totally fine. There's no judgment. But keep in mind, this is our opinion, and you, mom and dad, decide what fits with you. You are the deciders. So again, I just feel like the better informed you guys are, it gives you the opportunity or allows you to ask better questions. It adds to the whole learning process. And then you can feel more empowered to know what direction you're taking or when to shift. And so it's really about the more that you have in your understanding toolbox, right? And you can start to apply in your everyday life and then see how your children respond. So the to wrap this all up, when do parents need to seek advice? Or when do I think it's time, right? When there's a limited number of vocabulary and anything that's on that final list or that list that I just shared with you, that they were quiet as an infant, they had middle ear infections, limited number of consonants, their pretend play is kind of sketchy, they're not imitating new words. Um, they use mostly nouns, they don't use verbs, uh, their social peer interactions are non-existent or limited. Family history, mild comprehension delay, and a few, if any, gestures. Those, so when you have a child who has limited number of vocabulary, 10 words, five words, even you know, 20 words, and anything on that list. And focus in on those last three: the family history, mild comprehension delay, and few gestures. Those are kind of bolded on that list. I would suggest instead of a wait-and-see approach, that you call somebody, call your pediatrician. If you don't like their response, then call directly a speech pathologist. I mean, I love it when parents call me and I can talk them through it, answer any questions. They don't have to come in for an evaluation, but at least get some of your questions answered. Um, if you uh if your child is still, you know, below the third birthday, every state has some kind of early intervention program, right? Or and we can talk about that in a future episode. There are pros and cons to that. Um, you know, talk to a friend who perhaps their child had speech issues and went to a speech therapist. You know, pick their brain, call your mother, call your sister, call somebody and bounce ideas off of. Don't just wait and see and hope, because I know, I know that feeling, I know it, that you just hope everything will kind of write itself. And it may, right? Remember the statistics about 70% do, but 30% don't. That's one out of three kids. And I think that number is going to escalate when we really step back and start collecting information you know, post-COVID. But getting help for your toddler as early as possible has never been regretted. And, you know, a therapist might say, oh no, he's fine, or let's take a wait-and-see approach. And what I've said to parents is, at least I have a baseline measure, right? Whether it's a standardized test or a parent questionnaire, um, and I would record my initial couple of episodes or a couple of sessions, and um, and I have that data. And then we look back, you know, three months from now, four months from now, how far have they progressed? Uh, sometimes I just give a parent a to-do list. Sometimes I see a parent and their child three or four times, and they kind of take the ball and run with it, and then get back to me. So there's a lot of different ways you can count it, count um or or cut it up, right? And and implement it. But you have to do something. I'm sorry. It you are the mom, you are the dad. If they don't meet some of those criteria, or they have very, very few vocabulary and anything on that list, please step up. I know it's not easy, but it's better to deal with now than later. So, yes, there are pros and cons, and we can talk about each scenario at a different time. But meanwhile, if you call and you get put on a waiting list, don't just wait. The name is on the waiting list, but you, mom and dad, can still do stuff, right? You can educate yourself, you can read, you can research, listen to podcast videos, um, talk to other parents. Uh and this, I'm really excited. Come January and February. I'm launching some new programs that you will have access to. But you can go back and listen to previous episodes on here, like I mentioned, episodes two and three, the the must-haves before those first words kick in. You can also look at episodes seven, eight, and nine, where I really explain the relationship between chewing and eating, development skills, and speech, which is that motor part of talking, right? And then, um, and then, you know, if you haven't listened to episode number 15, where I talk about parental essentials, where if I was a new parent, if I was exactly in your shoes today, what would I focus on? And that'll give you good insight too. Um, okay, so thank you, thank you very much once again for your precious time. If you're finding benefit to these episodes, please share with friends and family. And don't forget to subscribe. You don't want to miss any episodes, but also take a minute, if you will, to leave an honest review and help with my rating and understanding of how I can extend my reach, connect with more moms just like you, but also find and build content that's important to you. If you give me feedback, then I can direct the flow of these episodes. I'm on a mission to reach 10,000 moms, just like you, new moms, moms who have questions, moms who worry, moms who have confusion, find that clarity and make 2023 the best year ever. If you're ready to take charge, I'll do it with you. So happy, happy holidays. I think this episode is coming out toward the end of the year, and I'm so excited to be here with you all. God bless. Bye bye.