PLAY-Based Learning with 12-18 month olds - keep is simple, let them struggle Ep 22

Episode 022

PLAY is the WORK of your child …

In this episode, I expand on what types of play is best for the 12 - 18 month old AND why they need you to play with them.

It’s a very exciting growth period with a lot of Aha moments. 

Your toddler is constantly moving, doing, and trying things out … don’t inhibit this exploration. He is busy building his brain circuits!

Also - I explain why they need to struggle - every once in a while. 

Don’t be so quick to “do it for them.”

Childhood is messy - and us adults need to get comfortable with the mess, because the other side is brighter and so much more rewarding.

Penelope Leach, author of Your Baby and Child: From Birth to Age Five wrote:

For a small child there is not division between playing and learning;

Between the things he or she does “just for fun” and things that are ‘educational.’

The child learns while living and any part of living that is enjoyable - is also play.

It shouldn’t end with childhood. Let’s bring it back into our lives, through our children we can reignite our play skills. 

Everyone benefits. 

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www.HyerLearning.com
 
 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Hello, and welcome to Talking Toddlers, where I share more than just tips and tricks on how to reduce tantrums or build your toddler's vocabulary. We're going to cover all of that, I assure you. Our goal is to develop clarity because in this modern world, it's truly overwhelming, especially during these past two years. This podcast is about empowering moms to know the difference between fact and fiction, to never give up, to tap into everyday activities so your child stays on track. He's not falling behind. He's thriving through your guidance. We know that true learning starts at home and And Talking Toddlers, this podcast helps you develop that with clarity, confidence, and clear communication. So let's get started. Hello, and welcome back to Talking Toddlers. I'm Erin Heyer, your host and owner of Heyer Learning. I've been helping good parents become great parents for over 35 years. As a speech language pathologist, Trust me, I've been in the thick of it with the schools, public and private, early childhood development, intervention programs, both in the state and hospital-based. I've watched the medical models change over 35 years, not always for the better. But what I really find interesting is it's the everyday lifestyle, our modern day world, and all its remarkable advances seem to have created these side effects that we don't always like to talk about. And maybe perhaps we address them, but in a very minute way. And we've kind of learned to ignore them, minimize them. And what I really feel what's currently happening is that both the professionals, the families, the community at large seem to be lowering our standards. And so As I move forward with this podcast, with Talking Toddlers, I want to be more and more and more transparent because my first and truest purpose is to speak my truth. My 35 years of practice, bringing it out in a broader audience so you new parents of a brand new baby or a one-year-old or a two-year-old or three, four, five, six-year-old. I want to share with you what I've learned while practicing early childhood development and all of these systems that we have to interface with. And I want you to understand that I use the word practice with very specific intent and Anyone in the health field, or actually in any field, I hope, use the word practicing because we do our utmost best with the information we have at that particular time. knowing, hopefully, that as new information comes up or arises or is discussed or is shared by a wealth of different fields that should always be open to discussion, that we as the practitioner continue to learn and adjust our implementation and adjust our knowledge to both our individual clients and our colleagues. So with that in mind, I've been sharing the importance of play with our current modern children and really looking at it historically for the last 50 years or last 100 years, where we've been collecting data, collecting information and people with, you know, different skill sets than mine to analyze and the behaviors and looking at some cause and effect and looking at how we can cluster some of this information so we can do better for our children. And the word play, I think, still gets kind of a bad rap for our children because we've really kind of pushed our expectations for younger and younger, younger kids to do more kind of formal activities. and formal education and quote-unquote learning through more structured adult-led or teacher-led or therapist-led. And the truth is that play is really a child's way of learning and his or her environment. And that if it is his or her job, their work is just so happens to be called play, right? So when a little baby is learning how to crawl, that's work. If you've ever really stepped back and analyzed it and watched your little one try to master a physical skill, pull up to stand, right? When they kind of are... tugging on the cushions and trying to get their leg that's stuck under their big diapered bottom and organize their body in this three-dimensional space and try to stand upright. That is a huge skill. And so that's work. Even though you and I, you know, jump out of bed or roll over and laugh with our kids and think it's all light and fluffy and simple and easy because we've been doing it for whatever, 30 years, 40 years, 50 years. And they have just been around for a few months, a few years. They're trying to figure out just how complicated some of these expectations are. And So we have to put it in perspective that play is a child's work and that we as the adults in the room also need to embrace this play and that they learn through us by modeling, by guiding, inspiring, and really expanding. So when they get stuck, if they're trying to pull themselves up to a stand with a couch cushions, then we can give them a little nudge and then they can feel what it looks like to unhinge their leg when it's stuck underneath their bum and say, ah, I did it. I figured that out. And then they fall down and they try it again. And that's work. That's effort. You and I think that that's a minor little task. But for this little guy, this little 10 month old, he or she is working his buns off. And we have to respect that. So today's episode is really focusing on a specific age that I really want to hone in on that 12 to 18 month old child between their first birthday and when they turn 18 months. There's a big jump. And I will go back and do other episodes talking about specifics when at the three and six month mark. because that's very, very important too. But I wanted to kind of start at this toddler age of 12 to 18 months because it's a very, very exciting time. So much is happening and there's so many aha moments, right? So give or take around that first birthday, that's when the first true words start kicking in and it's typically something other than mama or dada because that's the universal motor planning. And then we've taken on that kind of name. I've mentioned that before. But it's also when they are pulling up to stand and they could be taking their first steps. And yes, we've talked a little bit about what are milestones and what are the expectations and how rigid or tight should we stick with them. And please go back and listen to other episodes where I talk about our milestones really important. And yes, Yes, they are. Yes, there is some wiggle room, but we still have expectations. But this whole developmental area of connection between their motor skills, their cognitive, their social, emotional, and their language, and it's all working together as this beautiful human being blossoms right before your eyes. But he needs you. He needs you to engage and model and inspire and show him the way. That's how us humans work. best. And that's what we're striving for. How can our children be the best version of themselves with a little bit of difference here and there and a little different color and flair and temperament and style, but our expectations are still fairly consistent across the board. When I look at a 12 month old or a 16 month old or a 20 month old, There's a lot of consistency. So you, my listeners, probably work with toddlers or you have toddler in your life. And so you know that these areas are working together, that kids are constantly moving. They're doing, they're trying things out. They're curious to do that. And that's what we should constantly be encouraging. And yes, between this 12 and 18 month old, age bracket, they should also be able to sit and attend for longer and longer periods. And that's where those moments of shift can really be seen, where that they're putting it together enough with their ability to sit at a table or sit in a chair with you and share a book or play with various, you And be engaged with you for longer and longer periods. When, you know, later in the afternoon, when they're a little bit more settled and they want to read a book with you, a lot of movement and sharing at different times. periods throughout the day. So at this time, I really want to address a question that continually comes up or a comment, and I hear it in Facebook groups, I see it in my practice with new parents, and I have throughout the years, that it's all about, you know, that moms mostly should, they feel like they should have trusted their own gut, that when they started to ask questions like, is my child on track? Should I really, you know, get an opinion, a professional opinion? And I want you guys to always be asking questions and always seeking help when you have a concern, when you have a question, that waiting is never the best choice. It really isn't. And I don't know why pediatricians or why the medical community at large tend to have this wait and see approach. And I think it's become more and more their kind of go-to and it's really not serving anyone. It just really breaks my heart each and every time when I take a new call and a mom says, you know, I've been talking to my pediatrician for the last six months, eight months, 12 months, and they've been dismissing my concerns and or saying he's just a boy, he'll figure it out. And that drives me crazy and so if you're listening to this and you have a concern pick up the phone and start calling people asking questions and don't I mean what's the big deal you go and you meet with a professional and they play with you or play with your kid you know you do a history maybe you can do some standardized testing there are a number of standardized questionnaire forms that the parents can fill out or the daycare provider you gather information and you say at the end oh well wow, everything's groovy. That's cool. Let's keep going. And you have a benchmark there then that you can, six months from now, you can look and review it and say, wow, look how far he's come. He is really on track. He is fine. And putting all of these pieces together. You have data, you have things that you can actually measure and use to put your heart and soul at peace. And knowing that when you watch your child sleep at night, that you don't have to worry, that you are doing a great job and he is in good hands. But if there is a concern, you want to know, how can I change it up a bit? What does he need differently in his daily routine to help close those gaps? And so my purpose, besides being very transparent and answering questions as honestly as I can, is also to prevent delays, prevent these gaps from getting bigger and bigger and bigger. And the truth is there's so many red flags, so much information out there that we can, it's not prematurely labeling a child. It's simply saying, wow, look, he's having difficulty attending and listening to your spoken language. What can we do to help him? Or, you know, yes, he has a few words, but he's not really using them for purpose, or he's not expanding on them. them. One to two-year-old kids should be acquiring 8, 10, 12 new words a day. And so there is so much that is going on from birth, well, those first nine months in utero, but of course, of course, but for those first 12 months and the first 24 months and the first 36 months from speech to developing concept understanding and meaning of longer utterances to the whole physical play and movement and being able to walk and climb and jump. And then there's developing grammar for your primary language. At the foundation to all of this is their ability to interact and to express themselves, both verbally and non-verbally, but it's that engagement, it's that interaction. And that is the foundation to life and communication and social skills and learning. We will all, you know, ultimately get to the academics and all of that, but we can't get there if the foundation is weak or if there are cracks in that foundation and nobody's gone back to ask why. So let's go back to the topic at hand, which is play and which is really work, which is really development, which is all of it. But we as the grownups need to kind of adjust our mindset with playing with our kids because there's so much you should be doing at home from day one. And I do use the word should purposefully here because I want to empower you. I want you, mom mostly, but also dads, I want you to know and believe in your heart of a heart that you make a huge difference every single day. And so go back to episode number 14, where I talk about developmental milestones, because they are important. And so even if you need to get some therapy, some speech or occupational therapy, that's only going to be once or twice a week. It could be 20 minutes if you're going through a public school. It could be, you know, a home visit, visit once or twice a month is very, very, very limiting. And that's for a whole different conversation. But I want you, mom and dad and the family system to understand the power that you have, that you can be doing each and every day. I spent two hours this morning at a private home helping mom and her sister clean out all the toys and thin them out and show them that her little boy really needs concrete uncluttered environment so they can play with purpose. So they know exactly, they can take out one bin, here are a whole bunch of blocks, let's do it with purpose. Let's help him learn how to engage and have fun. Some kids need a lot more modeling. Some kids need a lot more hand over hand. And yes, this little guy has measurable developmental delays, but in the matter of two weeks, we have improved his ability to engage and vocalize, even though they're not real words yet, but he's certainly using a lot more varied sounds and noises and engagement, both verbally and non-verbally, and really enjoying it. And mom and dad and the extended family, they're all in it. And it's so exciting to say, you don't have to wait This family was on a waiting list for a year. It breaks my heart. that families have to go through this. And so my goal here is really to help families, new families, no matter if you know 100% that your kid is right on track and he's doing great, get confirmation. You know, by listening to my podcast, by reading some of the articles that I have links to, by listening to other licensed people who've been in it too. And they don't always have to be licensed. I don't Don't get me wrong, because there are a lot of experienced moms out there that have great advice. But I want you to know that you don't have to wait, that you interact with your child each and every day, whether you give him a bath or you're feeding him or you're changing his clothes. The other thing was, I was encouraging this family to playfully getting him engaged with those everyday things, teaching him how to take his shoes off and put them on the tray by the front door, to put his toys away when he's all done. And we all cheered and he cheered and everybody's happy. That you can turn any activity into a learning experience, i.e., play. It's play-based learning, right? We play with these blocks and then we put them away. Hip, hip, hooray. And the kid is happy. Now we move on to a trike. And, um, And he would just kind of sit there and rock back and forth. And I said, well, sometimes you have to show him exactly what to do. And I got behind him on his trike and I helped him pedal slowly and slowly, but surely he got to the feel for what happens when he pushes against these little baby pedals. And he's like, wow, this is cool. I can do this. I can do this. And he did it. Now, will he remember tomorrow? Maybe, maybe not. We'll just remind them again. And it's all a process. Some kids need a lot more hand over hand. Some kids have big gaps and need a lot of support throughout their day so they can gain those skills too. And we do it playfully. We do it, we meet them where they are, and we do it through those seven stages or seven types of plays that I've talked about in previous episodes that I'll link to. But looking at the engagement or the attunement, looking at object plays, such as with these blocks or with the cars, looking at movement and body where, again, on the little trike or learning how to climb up those stairs, all of that is playback. based. And that is where moms and dads really need to embrace and understand that it's work for them, but we can make it joyful. We can make it so exciting that he's learned how to go up and downstairs. That is just kind of the cat's meow to a 16 month old or an 18 month old, depending on their base skill, right? So I go back to to these milestones, because yes, kids do differ a little, but there's momentum involved. And so some kids will have what we refer to as splinter skills, right? They're scattered. And so it is important that parents understand how they can continue to help them move forward. And I've mentioned this before, there are definitely periods of time where there are huge developmental skills that they're trying to master, such as the infamous potty training, right? And things will take a back seat. And so sometimes speech will kind of slow down, or they'll be a little bit more disfluent or disorganized. And that's a pretty common, it should only last a few days here and a few days there. And it should go up and down over the course of a couple of weeks. It should never completely regret But they do... understand, I mean, on a subconscious level, our children are pretty wired pretty well in the sense that it's like, I can only handle so much and learning how to sit on that commode and not be freaked out and feel my body kind of, you know, in this suspended space and all of this and bathrooms can be kind of cold and weird. And, you know, kids have these different perceptions. So we have to give them room to experience that. And there'll be two steps forward and one step back. But if something does take the backseat, you want to just keep an eye on it. You want to understand that I have always used the terms ebb and flow, but they're continually moving forward. It's not a perfect linear line. It's, you know, some kids, and I've talked to hundreds and hundreds of families, you know, there's a different style to them where they'll have a big jump and then they kind of plateau, but they keep everything going, right? They're still talking. They're still playing. They're still engaging. Their sleep is good. Their eating patterns are pretty solid. But they're leveling out and then they have another big jump. And so we do have that style of a development child or a developing child. And then we do have these, you know, wiggle up and wiggle down and wiggle up and wiggle down, but they're moving forward and that they're not regressing and they're not just flatlining. They haven't hit a complete plateau. And that's important because we have so much going on. between those first birthday and their third birthday. So back to being specific. with play tasks or what can you do with that one-year-old to that 18-month-old? What do they want to do and what kinds of play can you engage with them and help them learn through these play-based activities? So keep in mind that quote, play is the work of the child. That's their job. You and I, the adults leading this beautiful child through need to change that mindset and you know, these are just kind of stories that we tell ourselves that, oh, kids will figure it out themselves, or all kids are different. I'm not going to worry. I'm going to just kind of, you know, turn my head and have faith that he'll figure it out. Or sometimes a story that we could tell each other is that, you know, he's teething, that's why he's cranky, or, you know, he's just not a good sleeper. We kind of give them these labels. All kids, you know, go through these phases. I shouldn't really compare this kid to that kid or my neighbor's kids or my older kid. All of these stories that we keep telling ourselves. And I hope that my message resonates with you not to sit on it, not to wait, that I've said, before, we're building brains, that brains aren't born, that we have to build them through some effort, some energy, true engagement. You can look at, I actually did an episode, I think it was episode number four. That's how important it is. It was early in my podcast series where I want parents to really know that, yes, we understand when they're newborns, that first four weeks, even two months that they're so innocent, they're so sweetened, but once they start having a little bit more personality, we kind of let them lead the charge, which is important, mind you. I get this whole child-led mindset too, and I believe that, but you kind of let them... show you what they're interested in, and then you expand upon that, or you show them multiple ways of interfacing with it. For example, another family recently was really trying to get their two-year-old to understand, you know, to put these shapes in this sorter, right? A box with a square and a circle and a triangle. And I said, he's not quite ready for that. So just have him put it in the top, open up the lid and you fill up little objects with the whole box, put the lid, shake it upside down, dump it. He's into... Where he is developmentally and playfully is putting things in containers, closing them up, shaking them, and then dumping them. And that's where he is developmentally. He's not ready to match a square and a circle and a triangle, but he likes to put things in places that usually don't belong. But so what we did was showed him how you can take a wide variety of your toys and put them in different containers and mix them up. And then we also helped him sort like, oh, when we're all done, we're going to put the blocks in this box and we're going to put the pretend food in this box and we're going to put the cars in this box. And then we showed him how things were organized and that some things are similar and some things are different. We can mix them all up and then we organize them again. And we did that for several sessions. And then the little boy started really kind of intuitively understanding how things get put away when we're all done. Now, is it perfect? No, he's two years old, but we can do the cleanup as playfully as we can do the task at hand. So keep that in mind that it's really about how we can take what they're interested in and expand upon it. put a little twist and help through modeling and prompting and suggesting how they can take it to the next level. Also, keep in mind that it's okay for kids to struggle. It's okay for kids to put in some effort and that that's part of the learning and the playfulness or the playing in all of these things. And I do it sometimes with kids who are trying to get containers pulled apart or if they're trying to roll something out and I stand behind them and I put a little pressure, I show them with their shoulders or with their elbows, how they can flatten something out if they're doing with Play-Doh or putty or this or that, that they have to put a little effort into it. So remember to demonstrate your work involved and that work can be playful too. And it can be very rewarding, very satisfying to work through something and get out on the I think I've shared with you guys before in my late 20s and 30s, I really found my sense of play again. I got really serious in my 20s and that was kind of boring, but, or, you know, not much fun, right? And I really was introduced to road biking, right? Cycling. And I loved climbing hills. I was, you It was harder than hell sometimes. I mean, I sweated bullets and my legs would ache. But to do that, to push yourself through something and then get to the top, and it's like, wow, that was so gratifying. And that's what we want our kids to feel like, that work and sweat and effort when we get to the other side is awesome. And if we don't get to the other side, then we're gonna keep trying, right? Try again or ask for help. But that putting in effort can be very, very rewarding. And so we have to demonstrate that. And I am such a ham and a play actor and parents will often look at me like, wow, I never even thought of that. I'm play acting, trying to get the lid off of a container. Oh my gosh, this is hard. Oh, what do I do? What do I do? And I try again, try again. And you just role play this and they look at And then they come back the next day or the next week and they grunt and groan and play act just like you did. It's amazing how much they really pay attention and really understand when you are in it. And that you were demonstrating that what we're doing here, playing with this Play-Doh or playing with the blocks or the cars or whatever you're doing, that it's meaningful. that you're important and that I'm giving you my undivided attention, whether it's 10 minutes or 20 minutes or 30 minutes, whatever you got, or whether you're just in it with them when they're taking a bath or that you'd snatch a tickle and a giggle and a laugh and a peekaboo when you're changing their diaper, whatever it is that's really engageable and that they're connecting with you on a joyful, playful, meaningful, meaningful event. And I think on that note, that it's important that the modern day family, that the parents, the moms, the grandparents really understand that kids need us, right? And that the more we can help them learn how to play, then the more likely they can learn to play independently with themselves and then with their peers, right? And we all know that there's this parallel play between that first year and second year and up to their third year. They don't really engage with their peers socially with purpose and intention and turn taking and all of that until after their third birthday. And so it's really on us to help them develop those skills by playing with them. So let me share with you some of my favorites that you can focus with your 12, 14 month old all the way up to their 18 month, right? And looking for more kind of solidary and self-play. They're not really ready to play with you to share, but you can do it side by side. And that's where that modeling kicks in. And most kids need demonstration. Most kids need some hand over hand or some suggestion to, you know, if you're doing dress up to take the scarf and wrap it around your head and walk around with a little purse and, you know, model your new outfit or they will show you what they're interested in. And as I said before, you expand upon that. You help them set it up and then they can work through it. They can feel through it from objects like dress up, but also zippers or snaps that you can help them feel what it looks like or feel what it feels like as they zip back and forth with a little purse. And Again, do some struggles. Think and wonder, what can I be doing with this object? I wonder what I could do with these cups. Do they all go inside of each other? Do they stack on top of each other? Can I line them up from big to small? Can I put the blue ones together and the green ones together? Or can I feed my baby dolls? Can I do all of these different things with a cup? So... it's the object playing, but it's also movement. So this age group is really, really big into gross and fine movement. They're still a little clumsy, as you know, but they're working through walking fast or running, climbing, crawling, swinging, and they need our help sometimes, right? If they're scurrying over some rocks, you know, in your backyard or by the creek or whatever, you hold their hand and you help them really feel the ground underneath them. And the more that they manipulate their body in space, the more they're wiring the brain, but they have to do a lot, lot, lot of gross motor skills. And then they get, they hone in those fine motor skills. So they'll be grabbing things and touching things and feeling things with, with closer and closer, finer discrimination with their fingertips. But things like building or dumping or mixing, they do a lot of walking, go to the park, go in your backyard. I mean, when my daughter was 15, 18, 20 months old, I've shared with you, her biggest thing was like mastering stairs. And we'd make it down like two houses down the road. But that would take us 30 minutes because every step that she would see, she would have to practice on. I was out with a couple of kids the other day and they were just mesmerized by the leaves blowing off the trees here in Vermont and looking at the shadows and the rocks and noticing how things were different with the wind and the sun and hiding behind the bushes and how it felt cold on the grass and things like that. And I was just pointing things out and they were just having lots and lots lots of fun with becoming aware of their environment and just literally just playing, you know, on the grass and playing, you know, a very modified version of hide and seek where it's really just you know, noticing kids at, and they were mostly three, but just noticing kids that they were, oh, they're behind the rock or they're hiding by the bush and that kind of thing. But they were just enjoying the moment and having fun outside in different elements, feeling and laughing and being together, right? But this age group also looks at, and so they were slightly older, but you can do that with a 15 and 18 month old, hiding behind the tree and boo, or hiding behind the bush, even though they can see you and go boo. And so all of that kind of physical movement play. Also, this age group really thrives with building block towers, lots and lots of lids or sliding tops, looking at locks and latches. And, you know, what I really wanted to point out here was you don't have to spend money with this age group. You can find things around your house. You can look at, you know, lots of Tupperware or you can, you know, if you do have puzzles, you'd have to purchase them, of course, But get them really, really simple and very, very basic, and they will do them over and over and over again. They love stacking cups and just putting things together, you know, different size of plastic cups with a big bin of, you know, beans or... or different sizes of beans, black beans versus lima beans, and really helping kids learn how to manage and pour from one to another and dumping it, stacking nuts and bolts, and they like to turn things. And, you know, you can look around your house and find things that will help them organize their movement with objects. Pegboards, of course, Play-Doh. You can do, there's a number of homemade recipes that you can make your own Play-Doh. I like to use Thera Putty because it doesn't really stick on objects or clothing. And once you work it, it gets warmer and it gets a little bit more pliable, but you can also leave the lid off and it gets hard. It's a great tool to have. We hide things in it like little little objects and they have to find him and rescue the animals. Of course, there's that kinetic sand, but you can just go outside and do dirt and water and make mud. And that's really, really the same. That's where all these toy companies got the ideas from, because that's what kids did 100 years ago. They went outside and they played with, you know, nature. But it's, you know, using those same concepts. You don't, especially for those first couple of years, you don't need a lot of... expensive toys and all of this. You can use everyday objects. You can give them a little feather duster and they can help you around the house that they, you know, you can look in your kitchen and say, okay, you know, what can I give them that's safe that they can play with at their leisure as they're learning how to manipulate objects and rotate their wrists and hold on to, you know, a cup that's full of water versus a cup that's full of sand and the different weights that I have to adjust my movement in this play. And, you know, They also really, especially at this age, really want to be with you and do things with you. So let them, you know, like I said, give them a little feather duster or give them a cloth and say, here, you wipe off the table, you wipe off the chairs. They really want to be with you. And so to help around the house, give them, you know, here, wash the window. It can be dry, but even if you want, you can go outside and they can do this, the spray bottle on the sidewalk or on the front porch or wash this post and learn how to squeeze that spray bottle or shake a bottle. Lots of different natural movements. And then there's the everyday kind of responsibilities or chores, right? Learning how to put your clothes away. Okay, now you take off your clothes, you take a bath or something, then you take your dirty clothes. Where do they go. Let's see if we can toss them in the hamper, you know, make it playful. All of this is language-based, it's movement-based, it's understanding how their day works, understand how they can interact and contribute to the family. And it's all fun. And I think that that's my message for this week is to make your everyday fun. And it's not going to be fun 20 You know that. I know this. But you can help them learn... how the world works through playful-like activities that are classically playful, but also putting your laundry away or sorting the laundry or folding the towels. Yes, 18-month-old folding the towels is hard, but you can begin to show them, maybe after you fold them, then, open the drawer, put them inside. Thank you. Bye-bye. And, and you show them where they belong. That to them is helpful and playful and fun and successful, and they're doing it with you. And I guess that's my main purpose is that it doesn't have to be complicated. It doesn't have to be expensive. It doesn't have to be curriculum-based. It doesn't have to be, or it shouldn't be complicated that at this particular age, well, I would say for the first three years or five years, but it gets a little bit more robust as they get bigger. But the first year, of course, is all about getting their physical independence and getting them to attend with purpose language-wise, right? And to begin to listen and hear us and use or attempt to use speech to communicate. But once they're there, once they're really moving about your home and that we have to keep them engaged entertained. We have to keep them engaged and that we do that through object play and movement play and helping them understand how the day unfolds. And the more that you can make it natural, the more you can make it uncomplicated or spontaneous, then the more they'll gain those independent skills and understand as the months and years unfold, how they're contributing, how they're important, and that we can continue these play games in more structured format as they get older, but we have to build this foundation first. We have to help them understand that sharing this time, you know, whether it's two minutes or five minutes or 10 minutes or 20 minutes, that it's important because they're important. So Let's continue this concept of play is their job, play is their work, and let's us, the adults, not get hung up on this, that it has to be curriculum-based or it has to be purposely driven, that it's really about... embracing their curiosity about their environment and helping them understand, how can I be an active member? So let's recap what I've covered in this episode, that this period between the 12-month and the 18-month development is very, very exciting. Lots of aha moments. And it's important that we adults who are in charge of these beautiful children see these developmental areas across the board, working and connecting together, that it's a necessity that our children are constantly moving and doing and trying things out. That is their job. You and I look at it as play, but play is their critical driving force. And it's this time period, these six months where they're really beginning to sit and attend for longer and longer periods. And those are those small windows of opportunities where we build through language. We've already laid the foundation. that I've shared in other episodes. So please go back and listen to all of the precursors to that first word, which is give or take around that first birthday. And that's why these next six months are remarkable and how all of these things are pulled together and that this genuine engagement with you, with objects, with the environment really shines and is so exciting for your kids, for us, us as the adults for their future. And that this steady improvement, that you see a steady improvement daily almost, weekly in motor, cognition, language, and social engagement. And what what's happening through their activities, through their play, through their trial and error is that we see better and better self-control or regulation, that they're being purposeful in their gross coordination and development, in their fine motor skills, and in their thinking through language and experience. So With that, thank you, thank you again for spending your precious time with me. If you're truly enjoying these perspectives that I have for 35 years, playing with kids, sharing with parents, if you're gaining new insights, please share with your friends and family. Help me help all of us spread the word, expand our reach, support and inspire new moms just like you, new parents, new grandparents. I've had some friends reach out to me who are new parents, new grandparents, sorry. And they're very excited. And they are listening to this podcast, and they're thinking of things that I've just kind of shared with them throughout the years. And it's so much fun to kind of see these beautiful children through a grandparent's set of eyes. It's a new world out there. You know this, I know this, it is not easy to raise children. It never has been. But this modern day just has layered upon layers upon layers of complications. And that's why talking toddlers is so vital. That's why I really, really am so adamant in helping as many kids, as many families, not watch their kids fall behind. That too many moms are being dismissed. Too many families are saying, well, it's just your new normal. We can do better. I know that. You know that. Listen to your heart. It starts at home. It starts with you, mom, dad, grandparents. We as human beings are designed to grow, to learn, to expand our abilities through experience. And at the core, at the fundamental core is play. So on that note, I want to close with a beautiful quote by Penelope Leach. And Leach is best known for her book called Your Baby and Child from Birth to Age Five, which was actually published in 1977. I read it probably in the early 1990s, at which time she became pretty popular, sold over 2 million copies of this book, and actually won the BMA Award for Best Medical Book for General Audiences in 1998. And her quote says, for a small child, there is no division between playing and learning, between the things he or she does just for fun and the things that are, quote, educational. The child learns while living and any part of living that is enjoyable is also play. So think about that as you move throughout your days and your weeks. I look forward to next session talking more about play and how all of these parts fit together as your beautiful child grows and learns and just embraces life because of you. God bless. See you next time. Bye.

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