Laughter Is Medicine: Joy as a Nervous System Reset

What if laughter isn’t a break from healing… but part of the healing itself?

In this uplifting and surprisingly practical conversation, Dr. Sandra Marie welcomes intuitive reader and teacher Melissa Abell to explore how humor, play, and spiritual lightness help regulate the body, restore perspective, and reconnect us with a sense of safety.

While so much growth work focuses on effort, processing, and fixing what’s wrong, Melissa opens another doorway, one available in ordinary moments, shared smiles, absurd mishaps, and even deliberate practice.

Together they bridge neuroscience, trauma recovery, intuitive guidance, and lived experience to ask:

👉 What if joy is not a reward at the end of the journey? 

👉 What if it’s fuel for the path itself?

You’ll hear stories of “pre-emptive joy,” the biology of laughter, how connection changes our state, and why many therapists believe trauma healing is impossible without moments of play.

The episode closes with a gentle, guided 90-second nervous system reset you can return to anytime.

✨ In this conversation:

• Why laughter immediately shifts us into the present moment
• What happens in the body during humor and connection
• The role of shared laughter in co-regulation
• How children naturally access vitality through play
• Building a personal “laughter library”
• Why joy can prepare us for difficult experiences
• The difference between supportive lightness and avoidance
• How humor shows up in caregiving, emergency settings, and hospice
• Laughter as a fast track to alignment
• Simple ways to weave more ease into daily life

Enjoy this The Art of Nervous System Care Summit replay.

Connect with Melissa

email:  soulawakeningsession@gmail.com

Chapters

• 1:10 The Science and Benefits of Laughter
• 5:03 Laughter in Relationships and Community
• 8:46 Intentionality in Cultivating Laughter
• 15:43 Laughter as a Healing Tool
• 18:59 Navigating Spiritual Bypass with Humor
• 21:42 Trust and Spiritual Lightness through Laughter
• 24:58 The Role of Humor in Crisis
• 26:07 Joy and Laughter as Spiritual Guidance
• 30:46 The Importance of Intention in Laughter
• 37:36 90-Second Joy Reset Exercise
• 48:40 Inviting More Laughter into Daily Life

Transcript

speaker-0 (00:03.084)
Enjoy this Wild Soul gathering production. I'm Dr. Sander Marie. Pour yourself a really tall glass of spiritual curiosity and join me for the happy hour for the spiritually curious podcast. In the spirit of happy hour, cheers to some new insights, peace, revitalization, and perhaps an aha moment that may change your life. Enjoy this Art of the Nervous System replay. Thank you for joining us at the Art of Nervous System Care Summit. I'm Dr. Sander Marie.

And I'll be facilitating this conversation for this session on laughter is medicine, how joy, humor, and spiritual lightness reset the nervous system. Melissa Abel is joining us for this session today and she brings a rare mix of humor, intuition, and real world honesty. Thank you for joining us today, Melissa.

Thank you so much for the invitation, for having me and for selecting this particular topic for me because it happens to be my passion. It's part of my essence ever since I was born. It aligns so perfectly. Thank you.

I would totally agree and I'm definitely excited for our conversation. Much healing work these days is framed around effort, struggle, or fixing what's wrong. So today I'd like to explore a different doorway. One rooted in joy, humor, and spiritual lightness. From your perspective, Melissa, why does laughter matter?

It's kind of wild. There's so much around this. And in preparation for this today, I've been researching and studying all the neuroscience, the therapy, the trauma, everything, and really have quite a bounty of information in here. And yet what I took from it, as much of a joyful kind of laughing everyday person that I am, everything that I've learned about it, it makes me want to embrace it even more.

speaker-1 (02:01.228)
because it's incredible. There's short-term benefits, long-term benefits. It's like not only is it good for our immune system, our memory, our blood flow, our heart, know, rhythm, our breathing. It really resets the nervous system. And all that's good and well to me, like you could talk all day about, what's so good about, what is the medicine of laughter? But who cares? Because unless we're feeling it.

It's almost like we know broccoli is good for us and it's like, we'll either do it or not. To me, trying to talk about laughter in terms of all this research and everything is kind of missing the point. So to your question, the guides that I work with, that's my life work, is doing readings and intuitive things and they highly prize laughter. Sometimes they go so far as to tell a person,

You keep us in stitches. If not for you, you were so bored of this. We love the way you see the world. We love your sense of humor. And then you think like, wow, if spirit, if high dimensional spirit values laughter so much and joy, maybe there's something more here. The way they describe it to me is laughter is cathartic, just as tears are. They say, know, tears fall, but laughter rises.

that it's also, puts us immediately in the now. So there's no past, know, kind of suspends our minds, you know, we're just in it. Laraji is this amazing meditation teacher, musician and peace activist. And I've had the benefit over many years of doing some of his laughter meditations. Kind of like laughter yoga now is, but he would always call it a laughgasm.

that a laughgasm, it would reset your nervous system and aligns you with your emotions. It does so much good for us and it does suspend the mind. I love the way the guides describe it. One thing they always say is if you don't know what to do to be in alignment or to create a happy life or a joyful life or what you want, just laugh. Because when you're laughing, you're already in that zone. You don't need to think about it.

speaker-1 (04:23.746)
There's so much to it, even beside the actual scientific research and all the studies, which there have been many. It's a global language for short.

There's just so much wisdom in what you just said and how amazing that they're entertained by us. Honestly, with some of the things I do, I can see where they would be. With me specifically, that was just fascinating. We've talked a lot about self-regulation during the summit, but laughter is often relational. Can you speak to how shared humor, play, and even small moments of connection?

help co-regulate the nervous system, especially for people who feel isolated.

yeah. mean, so one thing they've studied, the research says that we laugh a lot more with others than by ourselves. I might be the exception to that. anyway, that it's such a bonding, it's such a community experience, but also, fascinatingly, they say that humans, a million years before language, laughter was the language. It was the way we communicated.

Bye!

speaker-1 (05:37.122)
Typically like what it meant, if you would laugh, you were telling others there's safety about. We can relax, there's no danger. It was really something, what it does when you laugh, it puts you into the parasympathetic nervous system, which is, know, we're at ease and we're not in fight or flight. Part of the joy of laughing with others is, my gosh, what an interchange, what an exchange. It just does so much.

And the other kind of thing that I learned that is fascinating is that children, apparently children, as young as 17 days, even if they're blind, even if they're deaf, they laugh already. It's part of who we are. But also that children typically have between 300 and 400 belly laughs a day. And also like adults in comparison only have about

10, maybe 15 if we're lucky. So to me, with all this kind of like, I think we found the true fountain of youth. I mean, like kids are so full of vitality and vibrance and energy and there's playfulness and what if one of the most simple built-in keys to our wellbeing and happiness is simply to embrace more laughter? So whether you can do it with another, which is to me, it's amazing.

But also, I mean, every day I just find that I'm laughing about something like just the other day. I'm pretty open when it comes to scent, fragrance, you know, I'm pretty, huh, pretty okay. But there's one scent, kind of scent that it makes me physically ill. Like I can't, I want to run screaming naked away from anything. So what do I do? I get a sample scent in a package and I think, oh.

What is this? And I look online for the reviews and it's like, this is the best. It's like everyone, nobody doesn't like this. And so instead of like spraying it into the air of all the things, it's that one sense that I can't stand. And what did I do? I had to just laugh myself silly, like of all the crazy things, Melissa. So it's amazing how much just embracing laughter at all.

speaker-1 (08:01.506)
but especially when you can laugh with another. One thing that I've learned too is you know how someone will come up to you and say, my gosh, you had to see this on my phone, it's so funny. And a lot of times we're like, nah, but they're like, that's one of the best bonding things that we can possibly do is take that opportunity to connect in that way. And whether you think it's funny or not is kind of beside the point, but it's like, here, this is something that I love and I want you to see because I think it's the best.

I love that connection with that. So do you feel laughter and joy is something that just happens when life allows it, or do you think of it more like a muscle, something we can intentionally strengthen and work with every day?

We definitely can intentionally strengthen and work with it for sure. Now we know it's beneficial. It's even beneficial for two minutes of laughter. Belly laughter is equivalent to a 20 minute jog. know, even cardiovascular benefits and even muscles. I've heard the researchers say, build a laughter library. Our sense of humor is so unique to us.

And I really feel like the tone, the sound, the way that we laugh is almost like our, guides always say, this is your energetic signature, like a fingerprint. They're not able to connect with our fingerprints, but they connect through our frequency, our voice, especially laughter. Whatever's funny to you, it may not be funny to someone else, but build yourself a library of what you think is funny and build on that so you can go in.

Any time, you know, one thing that if I may share something that happened recently was usually before I work with somebody, 99 % of the time I start picking up on the vibes. And for whatever reason, this feeling was foreboding. It was dark and heavy. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, what is getting ready to happen here? And the guide said, go online and Google, know, videos of uncontrollable laughter.

speaker-1 (10:11.638)
I think I brought up like a two minute reel and they said, play this. And I did. And by the time the reading got underway, I mean, I was in a much more elevated state, but it ended up to be something really intense and dark. So it was almost preemptive joy, that kind of thing. And it's so amazing how this takes shape for us. We don't even know why we're doing something.

One thing that the guides have reminded me of from years ago, almost 30 years, I was at a spiritual conference a whole week. It was a really wonderful, huge conference with big names, Life Spectrums back in the day. For some reason, it's a week long thing, my friend and I, who we went together, we had gone to the store the first day of the conference to get some snacks. And for some reason we got whoopee cushions. You know, they were right by my checkout, you know.

You're scaring me.

Yeah, like because the thing about it is I was never, I would have been an anti-WhoopiCushion person. I was like, that's not my sense of humor. But for whatever reason, we grabbed these things and the whole week was not only us, you know, having fun with each other, but the speakers, the attendees. The week was probably seven days of more laughter than I'd ever done in my whole life. Great giant heels and guffaws and...

Anyway, you just think, well, that's weird. You know, this is weird. And what happened was not even 10 days after we got back from the conference, my life took this absolute fork that I'd never saw coming in, in that my dad, 59 years old, he died while driving of an aneurysm. Life just took this crazy fork, you know, because he was a baby of...

speaker-1 (12:06.464)
seven children, his parents lived well into their 80s and 90s. so what the guys are telling me now was that was preemptive immunity. It boosted your immune system. It was preemptive joy. Your nervous system knew this was coming of all the crazy things, right? You know, to be like, you know, this is interesting. Just like I think I shared before when

I had this kind of crazy notion while driving to my mom's, look up a clean comedy playlist, and I'd never done that before. And I didn't even listen to it on the way there. And then I got really, really sick at her house to the point where she wanted to, everyone wanted me to go to the hospital. And I had a little break where I felt like I think I might be able to drive home, but I still felt like hot death. When I got in my car, that playlist just started rolling.

But what I noticed was when I got home, because I'd been laughing the entire way, pulled up into the driveway and realized like, I am completely well as though nothing ever happened. The guides always say laughter, the high frequency of it, your spirits are so high. Nothing unto word can really abide in that, including illness. It's just been so profound, even in looking back like, wow.

something in me knew where I would have been the person that would never touch a whoopee cushion, but there I was, you know, and what that did for me. Kind of wild, isn't it, when you think about those things?

It really is, and I love that you literally cured yourself with the laughter on that drive. And not even realizing it. So you had mentioned with that reading that the guides had given you some direction about the YouTube. There's a lot of tools that are available. think many times people feel like laughter and silliness needs to be organic, just randomly happen.

speaker-1 (13:48.376)
No

speaker-0 (14:10.424)
But we can facilitate that ourselves, right?

my gosh, yes. Yeah, like I was really surprised because I wasn't in the mood to look at a laughter reel, but there were like babies laughing hysterically and I just couldn't help but laugh. I think we all have our favorites of things that kind of make us laugh. There was that time during COVID when we were all adjusting to Zoom and there was that famous reel of that lawyer that had a filter someone had put up, he was a cat. They were trying to have a Zoom hearing and

Judge said, no, I think you have this filter. And the lawyer said, I think we can proceed. I'm not a cat. Judge, I'm not a cat. Like that never fails to completely, I just dissolve into tears laughing at that one. So we all have what tickles us. So to build a library that you can kind of keep in a file or a draft of like, this is what I can go to.

Myself, this is what I find really uplifting.

Let's take this another step. So you build your library, you have it, but sometimes that's not the issue holding you back. Many of us were taught explicitly or implicitly that pleasure has to be earned or that joy comes after healing. Your thoughts on helping people reclaim permission, reclaim permission to feel good now while they're healing.

speaker-1 (15:40.864)
Even

Absolutely. fact, the research that I've done, most trauma therapists, they absolutely with no equivocation say there is no possibility of healing from trauma without moments of play and laughter. It's not even possible. They described how even people with severe PTSD, as you have a moment, maybe it's just a shared laugh, maybe it's a smile. It's almost like a stitch.

that undoes the old trauma and it's weaving in this new, you're out of fight or flight, you're out of the hypervigilance where it's like we can have joy. And then it almost supplants the old trauma after just these tiny little, they call it like doses of joy, of laughter, of humor. It's so much more important than we can even know. The other funny thing is my guides, when I work with somebody,

A lot of times they'll just be so funny. I mean, the one-liners and they just love the hijinks. And what I realized though is that is the highest frequency. So I know one thing we've learned, if you go to a medium, if you're really sad about who you lost and the memories and I'm so sad and I'm lonely without them, it's going to be next to impossible for you to get a real...

charged message from that person because you're blocking it. The best thing they always say is think about when we would laugh or, you know, I have people, I think we all have our top 10 of people whose laughter itself is a tonic, is hilarious. you know, they always say, remember those joyful moments before you go to a medium because they're like, instead of a radio dial trying to get through with your frequency, it's like you punched it in, like it's a sex station.

speaker-1 (17:36.832)
I still remember my dad laughing Seinfeld episodes and he would laugh so hard sometimes that he would snort. And to me, when you're in the snorting zone, like there's nothing like it. It's so cathartic, it's so spiritual. But the other thing that the guides say about that and also all kinds of experts is that laughter is depth with ease. Laughter with ease. So we think of how laughter

with ease.

speaker-1 (18:06.548)
and joy might, they say it's not the opposite of trauma. Numbness is the opposite of trauma. So when you have lightness and joy and humor and laughter, it reconnects you. It's opening you again to your alignment, to your emotions, to your healing. And it's with ease. Now, is that like the best ever?

Absolutely, I love it. I just want to riff on this in a different way only because this comes up a lot. feel like you've answered this, but I want to address it specifically for what it is. Some people might worry that laughter or lightness can become a form of spiritual bypass. We hear about spiritual bypass all the time, skipping over pain instead of honoring it. Can you share your insights on telling the difference?

with nervous system supportive joy versus avoidance that could be construed as a spiritual bypass? And how might that difference look for people?

What a great question because I think we've all been down the spiritual bypass road a time or two, no matter what. And it's always the mind though. Yeah, and I think we're all getting so tired of that. This year, according to the guys, it's about really embodying, it's enough of the mind craft. to that point, laughter gets you out of the mind. It gets you in direct momentary, the now.

where there's nothing before, there's nothing ahead, you're in the now. It is very much like an orgasm in that, you you're not, you know, thinking about your taxes when you're experiencing that. Like the guys say, if you don't know what to do, laugh, because then you're absolutely aligned. You don't have to question it. You know you are. If you set yourself up like that, then you know everything. You've got a bank account of good and joy and happy times coming. So to me, it's almost like a,

speaker-1 (20:09.312)
an insurance against spiritual bypass. Because like they say, like laughter is not, or lightness is not bypassing depth at all. It's not avoiding trauma. it's like, well, even gallows humor. I mean, sometimes what I love, and I think we've all said it a time or two about someone we love, when they're getting near the end, maybe they've been in hospice. And what do we say? They had their sense of humor to the end.

Like they were still themselves because they had their sense of humor. And so it's such a part of us even to think that it was a language that we had before we had enough strength for language itself and how we do it when we're infants, days and hours old. think we're, yeah, I don't think we even know the half of it. I really don't. To me, it's like, yeah, you are assured that you're not spiritually bypassing if you're in laughter.

my mind.

speaker-0 (21:08.162)
I think it's important and just because there's so much discussion and conversation and labeling that goes with that, that you did a beautiful job of addressing that.

So Melissa, when I hear the word spiritual lightness, I had a hard time wrapping my head around the word spiritual lightness for a while. It almost sounds like a form of trust, trust in life, trust in the body, something like larger than ourselves. How do you see trust showing up? And if needed, how can laughter help restore it?

That's another like so, your question is so dialed in to what the research about laughter in that it's almost like even when life is falling apart, when you've lost somebody, when it looks like there's no hope, if you can have just a moment of laughter, it reminds your body that it's okay. It gives you perspective. It helps you kind of zoom out and it says, you you're still alive. You're still here. You're still breathing.

And it's just that very thing of like the truth of laughter is never going to take away what happens in life and some of the heaviness. Although my gosh, can be so valuable no matter what situation you're in. They say first responders always use dark humor. And obviously like where it might not be appropriate somewhere else, but it's absolutely appropriate in that situation. I know we had a...

who was in at home hospice and he was trying to stay alive for his son's wedding. The photographer came and it was at home and it was around Halloween and he would pretend to be just to have died as the photographer. You know, it was like not yet. You know, it was like time and again he did like the movie, you know, he's died and just the funny like he never lost that. When another dear friend went into cardiac arrest and they brought him back, but he wasn't.

speaker-1 (23:08.11)
conscious yet. So waiting to see if he's going to come back. And the first thing that he says when he opens his eyes, I'm back, you know, and so you realize in these moments of even fear and scarcity and you don't know if are you living or are you dying? Like it assures us that we're all in this together and there's never a lack of hope. As long as you can see the laughter and joy embodies

the spirit, the animating spirit of us. We are still here. I know one thing that was, I think, pretty heavy for all of us in December was what occurred with Rob Reiner and his wife. Of all the times and the spotlight being on that, I think we all had a hard time with like, my gosh, what in the world? Somebody that had always stood for laughter and joy and to have this

experience. I think that community, know, a lot of comedians and people rallying around that and even do you remember when COVID just hit and SNL or even 9-11, 9-11 if you remember when SNL came back on it's like, we, do we have permission to laugh again?

That's important to... I love that you related that to that because the world feels really chaotic and uncertain. I think that it's important to recognize that we do have to remember and give ourselves permission to go back with that. I love the example that you used with first responders. I spent much of my career in inner city emergency departments and you know...

Laughter is what got you through a lot of stuff. it was, I would say many people might have found what we were laughing about disrespectful. But if you're in the moment, it really allows you to keep a clear head and do what needs to be done. So I just, I love that example. As you were saying that I was just starting to connect how important that was. Despite what we were doing and saying day in and day out. I did laugh a lot in that job.

speaker-1 (25:28.524)
You know what's really cool is research says that nurses of all people collectively have the best sense of humor.

I would, yes, would concur with that for sure.

How great is that? know, so yeah, that's the best.

You and I know that guidance doesn't always come through the serious solemn moments that we just talked about. It can arrive through play humor or lightness in your thoughts. How can people begin to recognize joy and laughter as a legitimate form of spiritual guidance?

You know, this is where the nervous system comes in. They say that your nervous system is really a, it's not just a biological, it's really an interface, your spiritual interface and how it allows us like our nervous system, we always call it in the work that I do, the body mind, like the living library, the DNA. You just know things before your mind does. It's much faster. Just like how did my nervous system or some part of me know of

speaker-1 (26:36.214)
to spend a week with a whoopee cushion. More laughing than I'd ever done in my life because this big trauma was just ahead. I certainly didn't know that. There's so many things that we know if you even think about muscle testing, kinesiology, it's like you're getting to the intelligence of the body, which is like the mind is like the tortoise in comparison to what the body knows. And think how many times that you went a different way

somewhere and then you saw that, there was a big accident there just after that and so many things that we don't even think about. It's interesting. There's this great time ahead. The guides are kind of telling me like it's off topic and it's not off topic. So it's like, there's this big transit ahead. You could call it an astrological trance, but they're like, it's really not. They're saying there's this opportunity ahead.

between February 20th and like the 1st of June to sow. It's almost like they're giving us these magic beans to sow. And these magic beans are going to have effect for the next 38 years or the rest of our known lives, as well as many future lives. It's a 9,000 year cycle. But what they're saying is the most important thing, they're saying even if you don't ever care about astrology or spirituality or anything like

They're saying, this is the one time, this is the most important time of our lives ahead, because if we choose to, we will get to expand the expression of our identity. And they kind of liken it to, if we think about coming into the world, being who we are, we've been like a line up to this point, we're a line, we love being a line, we know how to be a line, we wouldn't trade it for anything. But then as of this time coming, if we choose, we can become a square.

And we might go kicking and screaming like, God, I'm just a lion. I never want to be anything. But then you get to be a square and you say, how was I ever able to function as a lion? Because you've expanded. The worst thing you can do is to do nothing. This is the way of their humor. Like if you just keep on doing the same things that you always have between that little window, it's like they're saying your job is to plant the seeds.

speaker-1 (28:59.766)
And our job is all the stuff after that. Like if you plant the seeds, you're going to expand, you're going to evolve. It's going to be amazing. If you do nothing, or if you just keep doing things the same way, nothing's going to happen. You're just going to recreate what you know. So they're saying, you know, if you do nothing at all, you don't even want to think about it. Just do things that you don't normally do. So this week when I was doing a reading for somebody, the guide said, Melissa, what if you go to a restaurant and order liver and onions? It's like, I'm like,

Like that's the last thing I would ever do is order liver and onions. they're like, exactly, exactly. Like you can actually do things that you would never think about. And they're just saying, even if you do just things that you never do, do that. But hopefully with intention, we can plant some seeds. If I'm a 7.0 version of me now, what does a 9.0 feel like? What would I tweak? And I tell you one thing after,

getting this luscious dream come true assignment about laughter is I'm going to incorporate a lot more laughter. What if we were to strive for 300 laughs a day like children? How might it change our lives? You know? How cool. It's amazing. Like it's so intoxicating.

Absolutely. Wow. Well, I'm really grateful for those magic beans. I'm ready for the whatever the 9.0 looks like. One of the things that you tucked in there explaining what the guide said, and I do want to highlight it, is you use the word intention. How relevant is that word intention? I feel like it's like super important at these exact moments.

Truly, I mean, because you know, they always say, it's so true, whatever we focus on, we get more of, whether it's what we don't want or what we do want. But most of the time, the big thing now is that we're so pulled away from any focus. We're so distracted by all the things. And if we actually said, like, for example, I just did a three-day fast, which is like a reset.

speaker-1 (31:10.516)
I just woke up today thinking, my gosh, how different do I feel after three days from the way I felt Tuesday morning, after just a three day not eating. And it was so joyful because I didn't have to decide what am I going to have for dinner? It was like, what am I going to drink? What am I going to drink today? Water, more water, black coffee, tea. It was so easy and freeing. But, you know, the first day you're kind of like, why am I doing this? And the second day you're like, I don't know. But the third day.

You're like shot out of a rocket. Dr. Pell says that people pay tens of thousands of dollars for stem cells and she's like, why? After 72 hours of a fast, your body creates new stem cells. It's a whole new, refreshing reset. So to me, that's a good example of being really intentional about, I'm gonna do this thing for three days that I never do any other time. I'm gonna stick to it. I'm gonna see what it...

what happens with it. And like it worked. And I do feel like, woo, you know, on top of the world, you know, a lot of energy. It's completely the opposite of what I felt like on Tuesday morning, you know, after the holidays and all that. If you can just say, remember on your calendar, put a note on starting February 20th, magic beans, sow my seeds, create my garden.

You know, and then let it go after June 1st. like, okay, I did my job. Just something like that and put lots of laughter in there. You know, something different. Go order liver and onions, you know.

Perfect. I love that you can just jump in and do things.

speaker-1 (32:51.926)
You better believe it. And I know the guides keep saying that this year has to be, we plant our seeds, we don't borrow some from our husband and plant those. do this. And if you do this for yourself, it's going to benefit everyone around you, everyone you care about, you know, for sure. What an amazing time to be alive. I think we're all so tired of the mind stuff, but to just being the embodied experience, the felt.

experience and that's what they say laughter automatically does. It's turnkey. It's embodied. You know recently to give you like something that again you don't really see coming. So as an intuitive person when I get worried or if I get anxiety it's usually pretty pointed like I should feel it. is such a gift like don't go down that road or don't go down that dark alley. But recently I had some kind of anomalous

anxiety coming up about something. It was pretty just dramatic and unexpected and surprising. I remember thinking, is this something that I should care about or is this like a real warning signal? So long story short, I asked my guides, okay, what's going on here? So you know what they did, the beauty of this, they said, we're going to give you an example and an experience of what

life is going to become on the other side of this expansion, you know, that we're talking about. So instead of giving me words, which they knew would never fly, never fly because my mind would have just taken it and run with it and doubted it and questioned it. Instead of that, they put me in a kind of reverie where they took me to the other side where all of my loved ones and people I know and admired, know, my ancestors that I didn't know or did know, my

pets on the other side. And it was this field of love. It was an actual field of love. So in about two milliseconds, my nervous system just shifted. that then I felt that I, I know that I am this love. And so then they took me through this cool experience of my horse on the other side, who was always our spiritual teacher, looking at life.

speaker-1 (35:11.978)
and people through his eyes, which was such a cool experience. I've always wanted to know, what is that like? But basically what the guides told me and what the experience was, was being filled with so much love and joy that when I went to this experience that I was dreading, know, worried about, they said, just shoot down the road. You're sending this love field before you. You're gonna fill the whole building with it. You're gonna fill the machinery, the equipment.

the people who work there, the people who are just there, all the space is in the hallway. It's already there and it's coming out of the top of the building. And then you're going to get in your car that day and you're going to be that love and you're going to show up and you're going to see. So immediately I went from this sense of dread to I can't wait. I can't wait for this. And so when the day came, it was about a week later, I experienced some things that I've never experienced. First of all, when I drove up,

My sign from the guides is always the 55s, 555s. That's like Archangel Michael. Everywhere I looked, it was almost like every car in the parking lot was a 55. What? So I go in and it's just like this heightened atmosphere. When the person came to take me back for the test or whatever medical thing, which was fine, she looked me in the eye and I looked her in the eye and we both started crying.

but it was just like, because I saw her through the eyes of love and she felt me experience her as love. And so there we are, two strangers in this momentary second of just crying with joy, with recognition that this is all there is. And that's all we need to know. Imagine the difference between

I'm in my mind trying to feel better or to make me feel better with words or whatever, assurances of it. They realize like that doesn't fly anymore. You have to feel it. And then we're going to give you this whole thing that you've never experienced before. And you're going to have this joy that, and you're going to spread joy. It's incredible. Like it was, I can't even put words there. So imagine if that's what we're coming into like, my gosh, you know.

speaker-0 (37:15.822)
Yeah.

speaker-0 (37:36.16)
As you're sharing this story, I'm like, this is the new normal.

Definitely.

I would say this is the future, but it's not the future. It's now. This is the new normal. Like we're literally in the transition phase of that. And it was just like so beautiful. I could feel it. Now that's a little hard to follow up. But I'm going to ask you, if you're up for it, would you like to do a 90 second joy reset? It's not going to be intense, but you just went through.

Absolutely, 100%. Yeah.

Okay, and this is for everyone in the audience to join in. Now this reset, it's not about forcing laughter or positivity. It's more about just gently signaling safety to the nervous system. So let's start. First, let's ground ourselves. Wherever you are, just take a moment to notice your body in the space. Feel the support beneath you.

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the chair you're sitting in, the floor, your feet. No need to change anything. Just notice.

speaker-0 (38:53.41)
Now take one slow breath in through your nose and a longer, softer exhale out through your mouth.

speaker-0 (39:05.41)
Let your shoulders drop just a bit. Not all the way, just a little. One slow breath.

speaker-0 (39:17.686)
Now, and this is optional if you want, bring to mind something mildly pleasant or amusing. Not the happiest moment of your life, just something light. A small smile moment, a memory. Someone holding the door open for you. The smell of coffee before the first sip. Laughing at your own joke. Even if you're rolling your eyes a little right now.

That's perfect. It still counts.

speaker-0 (39:53.878)
If a smile comes, it. If it doesn't, that's completely okay too.

speaker-0 (40:07.34)
Lastly, try a quiet inner gesture of lightness, a soft smile, a gentle exhale, or even a silent, huh, this kind of feels nice. This is enough.

speaker-0 (40:27.82)
Your nervous system just received a signal of safety.

speaker-0 (40:36.078)
Thanks for joining me in the exercise. That was just 90 seconds and it didn't require fixing or forcing anything. Melissa, your thoughts on how moments like this might be woven into everyday life in a way that feels natural rather than another practice to do or I have to get it right.

my gosh, there's so many, it's just so cool what came to my mind during that, just that brief interlude was recently I got some new cleaning stuff for the bathroom. Never used that kind before. Cleaned the bathroom with it, the drains. And I see my cat approaching like a banshee, like she's like wild-eyed and she comes into the bathroom and she's like smelling all the drains and she's like crazed. And then I see that she wants to like lick it. And I realized like this can't happen.

So I try to get her out of the bathroom, which has double doors. Well, it's almost like she gained super feline strength. She could have like stopped a freight train. So I'm trying to close the double doors on my cat, keep her out because she's gonna like drink this stuff. so the door is locked and then what do I do? I text my husband, he's downstairs. I'm like, my God, Twink, because then she starts beating on the door.

Like, it's like thunderous. It's like somebody's like gonna break in. And I'm like, Twink's gonna break down the bathroom doors, come save me. And then I just realized like she's eight pounds and I just start laughing, like convulsing. And he's like, what? Like, okay. But she was pounding so loudly on the door and it was just something that's so random. Like even the craziest normal.

things that we do all the time, you every day. It just can be so much fun. A friend of mine that I happen, our nickname for each other is PIOLE, which stands for partner in uncontrollable laughter. She took, I didn't know it, but she took a picture me in a full laugh. And she said it to me, and it's just priceless. Like there's something about it that gives me joy every time I look at it. And I think everybody.

speaker-1 (42:50.016)
If you have someone just snap, somehow get a picture of you randomly laughing, like it does something for you. And I know like Mel Robbins says to do the high five in the mirror. And I'm telling you, even if you're in the worst mood and you do this high five, you can't not smile. Like high five, you you're gonna get lifted up. I've been like, look forward everywhere. I had sliced a tomato recently and it had a giant smile.

So of course I took a picture. It's like, my gosh, look at this. So look for it everywhere. It's just like weave it in to your day. Like it's so spectacular. Just these moments of levity. And another thing that science has proven is if you watch something funny before sleep, before bed, you get a much deeper rest, a much more robust night of rest. And so I've been doing that with.

America's Funniest Home Videos or you know, anything Candid Camera, Old Reels. And it's amazing what a tonic it is. It really is a tonic.

my God, I love that. So as we were coordinating for this interview, you had attached that picture to an email. And as soon as I opened it up, Melissa, I have to tell you, I just busted out laughing. There was something about the picture that made me smile. It warmed my heart immediately. Just because we have some past experience, I was like, my God, this is just so, Melissa, I love it. and it is, it's like that simple picture has brought joy to people you probably don't even know.

wasn't expecting that it would be so profound. She loved it, of course, but I just thought like this is...

speaker-0 (44:36.206)
thought she was just messing with you. Little did she know.

and another thing, you science says that we can discern, our brain can discern the difference between staged or canned laughter versus the real thing. But a lot of times it doesn't even matter, even if we're fake laughing or even the yoga laughter where you feel like this is dumb, you know, what am I doing? Like, but then all of a sudden it really does have those benefits. and the other thing that's interesting is when comedians, I if you think about the cult,

nature of stand-up comedy. it's like a lot of times it's 3 a.m. you might get a five-minute set and they just can't stay away. It's like it's an addiction. They say that getting the laugh is so much more psychologically beneficial even when the audience is having the greatest time and they're being of service to the audience. But when they get that laugh, they're like there's nothing like it. And then they crave it. You know, even this morning I saw there was a documentary trailer about

Mel Brooks. And the trailer itself was just different comedians cracking up, explaining how Mel Brooks inspired them. You know, it's all about the laughs. It's fascinating too, to think if you start noticing how much you laugh or don't laugh. Like the other day, I just started to observe. My mom and I got on the phone and it wasn't even 12 seconds. And throughout the conversation, we just

laughed and laughed repeatedly. And they say, you know, get with people that make you laugh. And also one of the best compliments you could give someone is to laugh at what they're doing, not at them, not at their expense. I used to have a friend and we would talk on the phone. He was making me laugh so hard for so long that I just have to hold the phone. And I'm like, hold on. I would have to hold the phone away and he could hear me just.

speaker-1 (46:35.86)
laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and you know, another joke. It was the biggest compliment. What more could we want? Do we know that we're making someone laugh so hard that they can't even speak for a couple of minutes? Like it's the best exchange, you know, really.

It truly is, it truly is. To the point where you can't even talk.

That's the best, no holds barred. This is what I'm doing. This is just the state that I'm in. Yeah. There's nothing like it.

You can always go back to those in your memory. They somehow stick with you. I'm going to say it's a medicine.

It is, absolutely. And even in the Bible, it was mentioned how laughter is medicine. It's incredible. rats laugh. Monkeys laugh. and speaking of that, my parrot, we have a parrot that's probably almost 20 years old. And she recently, you know, we do a little walk in the evening with her on my shoulder in the house. And all of a sudden she started laughing because she's never laughed before. And I'm like, what?

speaker-1 (47:43.406)
We're laughing now? And then it was like, ha ha ha ha ha. It's like, so I must laugh so much that the parrot actually picked it up. But then what I noticed, I show her parrot videos, you know, on my phone for her. Like there's this parrot named Cruz. I'm like, Cruz is your boyfriend. But the other day I showed a little clip of Cruz doing something funny and I wasn't laughing. She started laughing at Cruz. And they're like, what is this? This is the best.

Speaking of just the joy of it.

my god, I love that.

It's intoxicating and it's definitely contagious. Yeah.

Yes, both of those for sure. So as we're to come to a close with this conversation, Melissa, what is one simple way people can invite a little more laughter, joy, spiritual lightness into their lives this week, give themselves permission, even just today?

speaker-1 (48:40.298)
Yeah, it's just think of those funny, ridiculous things that even that you experience that you don't even think about. it reminds me of the movie way back called Money Pit with Tom Hanks, where he was the house was just like constant, you know, money pit. And he so many times in the film got to the point where you're so out of your mind with frustration and anger and rage and despair that you just start laughing. It's funny because just this week.

My air in my tires in my car, they needed air. So my husband went out there with his compressor and he checked all the pressure and put the air in the tires and put the compressor away. My only job was to figure out how to reset the tire pressure monitoring system. So I'm on YouTube and I'm like, you know, trying to do it. That didn't work. And then I've got my 600 page owner manual out and it's like, you know, page 595, go to 323 and...

So it's like, if you could see my husband, keeps coming out like 10 minutes, 20 minutes, like, what? Like, what? I just had lunch and you're still in your car trying to figure this out. And it got to be so frustrating that I just automatically started cracking up because of the ridiculousness and yet it was hilarious. So how many times are we so frustrated that we're not even thinking about laughing, but it just happens?

Like almost people say if I weren't laughing, I'd be crying. And so even those just silly little things, you know, where the other day had five minutes to do something, but then I spilled all this stuff all over the kitchen during the five minute thing, that it turned into like an hour cleanup. And all I could do is just laugh. But to me, remembering people that, you know, that have the funniest laugh, you know, that their laughter alone, but also those amazing...

memories with your loved ones. I know you had mentioned that when you were living abroad that you had these pictures of just people laughing, right? That your loved ones, like that's so valuable.

speaker-0 (50:46.264)
Well, it shifts all the memories in your mind. So versus the staged, you know, holiday pictures or they were, as you said, people that were caught in the moment of just a random, genuine laugh. And I had them all over. And every time I would look at them, I would smile, but it would also, you know, shift the memory into a beautiful memory. Yeah.

I just feel like laughter is so much more powerful than we know. And I think of a living, walking, talking, breathing master teacher of our time is Byron Katie. And she even has reels of when people dissolve into laughter about their big problems. she had told the story of going to a doctor's appointment and getting a very dire diagnosis and how all she could do was laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh.

Doctor of course thought, you know, we got a live one here, she's nuts. But it could never abide, like whatever that diagnosis was, it never came to be. And you know, when she had been in the desert walking with her dear friend and he had a heart attack, they were away from cell phone range. I mean, she just started laughing and he got so outraged, like, how dare you, I could die. What are you doing? But then later he started laughing and they both just went on their way. I think...

It shifts more than we can possibly know. It puts us in such a high frequency, a high dimension that this could be the answer or thing that we've been looking for. So I have to thank you for picking this topic for me, not even knowing how near and dear it was to me, my essence, but also what I learned and gleaned.

right in front of us the whole time.

speaker-1 (52:35.254)
I'm actually doing a deep dive into what is known and what is scientifically proven, but also what the guides always bring. It is cathartic. It is joy. It is the field of love. And so have at it, right?

Perfect. Melissa, thank you for sharing your insights, your humor and deep compassion with us. It is always a pleasure and I always get my own giggles when we talk. This conversation truly offered a beautiful reminder that laughter and lightness aren't distractions from healing. They're part of the medicine and much more powerful than we think. I think that we're going to find them to be part of the new medicine, the new healthcare.

Truly grateful that you joined us today.

Thank you. cannot even express my full gratitude. It's funny. The guys, just as you were saying, it's like, it's a shortcut. It's a shortcut to healing. It's a shortcut to alignment. It's a shortcut to what you really want. My gosh. They're saying it's not only a suggestion, it's more of a soul directive. Include this in your life. Include it every day. Thank you so much. I have no words. I'm so grateful.

Thank you for joining us for this episode of Wild Soul Gathering's Happy Hour for the Spiritually Curious. To learn more about our guests, please go to our website, WildSoulsGathering.com. We're very eager to hear from our listeners what you thought of the episode, topics you might like us to cover in the future, your thoughts on spirituality, questions you may have. Please feel free to send us an email at WildSoulsGathering.gmail.com.

speaker-0 (54:19.64)
This is your host, Dr. Sandra Marie, sending each of you peace and love. Until we meet again, embrace your wild soul.