Danielle: Overcoming Infertility, IVF, Endometriosis, and HELLP Syndrome to the Creation of Making a Miracle

Every struggle carries the potential to birth a triumph, a mantra that resonates deeply with Danielle, the founder of Making a Miracle. Her story is not just one of personal victory over infertility's relentless challenges, but a testament to the transformative power of empathy and support. As we navigate Danielle's journey from her diagnosis of endometriosis through the tumultuous waves of IVF, miscarriages, and the complex emotions that pave the road to motherhood, we're reminded of the resilience required to hold onto hope amidst life's harshest storms.

Amidst the scientific precision of fertility treatments and the rollercoaster of emotions that accompany each cycle, there lies an intimate narrative that often goes unheard. For Danielle, these experiences were steeped in both pain and determination, leading to the joyous yet nerve-wracking arrival of her daughter and the subsequent battles with postpartum depression and recovery from a life-saving emergency C-section. This episode peels back the layers of motherhood and infertility, revealing the raw, unspoken trials that shape the sacred bond between a mother and her child.

Yet, it's not solely the struggle that defines Danielle's story—it's the incredible surge of kindness and community that buoys the spirit during the hardest times. From the cherished support of partners to the solidarity found in shared experiences, this narrative is a poignant reminder of the profound impact that compassion can have. As Danielle discusses the evolution of Making a Miracle, from publishing a coloring book to organizing community events, we celebrate the strength and connectivity that can emerge from life's most challenging chapters.

To connect with Danielle and Making a Miracle, check our her Instagram here.
For upcoming events including the Resource Fair on April 28th, click here.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Have you ever wondered how to turn your struggles into something positive that can help others? This National Infertility Awareness Week, we bring you an inspiring story of resilience, compassion and advocacy. In this episode, we sit down with Danielle, a brave mom who shares her story, from the heartbreak of infertility to the joy of motherhood, and how she channeled her experiences into creating Making a Miracle, a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting those facing infertility. Join us as we hear Danielle's emotional story, from the challenges of endometriosis and IVF to the life-threatening complications during her pregnancy and delivery. Discover how she found strength in her darkest moments and used her voice to break the silence surrounding infertility. Stay tuned until the end of the episode to learn about exciting local events Danielle has planned for National Infertility Awareness Week in St Louis and how you can get involved in making a difference in the lives of those struggling with infertility. Get ready for a powerful and uplifting conversation that will inspire you to turn your own trials into triumphs.

Speaker 1: 1:07

Let's dive in the Golden Hour Birth Podcast, a podcast about real birth stories and creating connections through our shared experiences. Childbirth isn't just about the child. It's about the person who gave birth, their lives, their wisdom and their empowerment. We're Liz and Natalie, the Golden Hour Birth Podcast, and we're here to laugh with you, cry with you and hold space for you. Welcome to the Golden Hour Birth Podcast. I am your co-host, liz, and I'm your co-host Natalie, and tonight we have Danielle on. She is a mama of one and also the founder of Making a Miracle, so thanks so much for coming on tonight.

Speaker 2: 1:48

Thank you guys so much for having me. I appreciate it.

Speaker 1: 1:50

Yeah, if you want to go ahead and share a little bit about you and your family.

Speaker 2: 1:54

Yeah, so me and my husband are I guess you can say it was high school sweethearts. We met at my senior prom and so it's kind of like this like fairy tale although it took us like 16 years to get married, but we were young and we're still here.

Speaker 2: 2:16

That's what it is. We've been through a lot together. I was 18. And you can imagine that's a lot to go through. And then one of the biggest things that we did go through was the start of our infertility journey. Yeah, which completely different from what we had ever been through before. Yeah, so yep. And then we have our pit bull pup. His name is Jitka and he was our baby for the longest time before we were able to actually have baby in human form, and that's mckayla. She's two years, sweet, she's so sweet.

Speaker 1: 2:54

So if you want to kind of go ahead and start us off on like when you guys decided to start trying for a baby, yeah, a baby, yeah.

Speaker 2: 3:02

So I would say in about 2015, I was finally diagnosed with endometriosis. I had struggled with it for a really long time. High school, I missed a lot of volleyball games, missed a lot of school, everything because endo kicked my butt and it takes about the average 10 years to actually be diagnosed with endometriosis and that was, uh, it was a few more years for me, but, um, finally I was diagnosed via laparoscopy and the doctor at the time was like now is the best time. You know, like I don't know where you are in your family building journey, but now's the time Next six months because endo can always grow back.

Speaker 2: 3:49

And so that was when I started to kind of I guess you would say try, because I wouldn't say we ever really didn't try or was careful, so, but in my, in the back of my head, I knew something wasn't right and I went to my doctor, advocated for myself, and they still wouldn't help me with anything and we weren't getting pregnant. So I reached out to a local fertility clinic and told them tell me what to do. I don't know you know where I'm going with this, but I there's something not right, um, and she got me to another doctor who then did some tests and sent me right back to her. Um, that was the end of 2015, 2016, um what were your like symptoms of endometriosis.

Speaker 2: 4:42

So a lot of it was pain around my period. Now it was like more of the debilitating pain, like I don't want to get off the bathroom floor. I had a lot of, you know, the bloating and also the nausea, like I just felt so sick all the time and that was just around my period. So it was okay, you know. But I also didn't have regular periods. So, you know, one month it would be absolutely horrible and then, like a week later I'd have another one. You know those types of things. So it was very abnormal what I was experiencing and everyone just kind of told me that's how periods are. So I know it was absolutely horrible and I hate that they do that. But painful periods are not normal and if you're having pain, then you need to get help.

Speaker 1: 5:40

I can't believe it takes a woman of like average of 10 years to be diagnosed that is insane, and about one in 10 actually are diagnosed with endometriosis.

Speaker 2: 5:52

So so many women that you know don't get listened to, and that's why it's important to advocate for yourself.

Speaker 1: 6:00

It's like are these OBGYN's like not aware?

Speaker 2: 6:05

that this is a thing. Well, and you know I actually had to. So I didn't actually get diagnosed until I moved to st louis and back where I'm from. They didn't have specialists and things like that. And there was actually a specialist that I saw when I came out here, my ob-gyn like this sounds like what it could be, and so they connected me with that doctor and that he was like immediately, let's do the excision surgery and I think it's, I think it. You know, depending on where you're from, it's it was newer than for there to be specialized doctors for that. But yeah, it's, it's a it's definitely an interesting disease and you know there's so many studies about where they can find endo in your body and you know those types of things.

Speaker 2: 7:01

So yeah, it's just advocating for yourself is so important yeah like yeah, you know your body better than a doctor yeah, and that's that's kind of where I was when I, you know, when someone was like I'm not gonna help you, we're not gonna do medication or anything until you show me that you've been trying for a year, and at that point it was just kind of like I'm way beyond this, I have to get a second opinion. And that's when I finally was able to meet my fertility doctor and the most incredible woman I've ever met in my life, absolutely. So we kind of jumped into the fertility world and we were very new at it, had no insurance, we were young and we tried everything we could, the cheapest way possible, and that started with like timed intercourse where maybe a shot of Avadryl was 150 to 300. And that's all we had. And so we tried it over and over and over again and it was draining and I just felt like nothing was working. This isn't going to work. I knew in my head like this is not right. So.

Speaker 2: 8:20

So we ended up going into insemination and we did that a couple of times and after every time I left that clinic after I don't know I was inseminated. I was like this is not going to work. I like, and I know that I need to be more positive. But you know, like you said, you know your body, you know that when there's something not right, you know there's something right. And that will also come into the end of my story because, like, if you don't speak up, no matter how much you feel like you're bothering somebody, the worst could happen. So insemination didn't work and we were lucky enough to where my husband just got a new job and they had infertility benefit and it was like this thing where everything just came together and I was like, yes, this, this is right. I went and I met with my doctor and I I've said this before, um and other things that I've done but I remember sitting in the office with her. She came in and I said I don't think this is working. Can you tell me more about IVF?

Speaker 2: 9:40

and she was like I was hoping so much that you would finally come and ask me that because I know that you couldn't afford it and I wanted you guys to be comfortable, but I am so glad that you're ready for this. I wasn't ready for that. Infertility sucks, ivf sucks and I was very blessed to have some insurance. It's not mandated in the state of Missouri and I was very blessed. We were able to get through two rounds of IVF. The first round I had four embryos. Can I say this out loud that embryos are not children, although I felt like my embryos were my children because I worked so hard to have them.

Speaker 2: 10:30

I know for a fact that it does not result in pregnancy and I had my very first transfer. I got pregnant and I thought it was like, oh my gosh, everything came together, pregnant. This is amazing. And then it was gone and that was like one of the hardest things that me and my husband in the I think at this point we'd been together like 11, 12 years that we had been together. I had never experienced that, plus failed transfers, plus another loss, and then Michaela ended up being my sixth transfer and I remember like I didn't know how to be there in any type of way for my husband. He didn't know how to be there for me it was like we were battling each other's grief and battling each other at the same time, and that was so hard to get through that going through it. I don't think I would ever know my husband as well as I do without what we went through.

Speaker 2: 11:51

So, yeah, infertility sucks. It was a lot, and my story is still not resolved where I am in my journey. But I know with what else we're going to talk about, with my birth story that I am not capable of having another child myself, so the journey may take another path. I don't know right now. It's just, it is what it is until we get there, I guess.

Speaker 1: 12:30

So do you have to go through more?

Speaker 2: 12:33

So you said, would I have to?

Speaker 1: 12:36

Did you have to?

Speaker 2: 12:37

Yeah, so the first time I had four embryos. So we went through two rounds of IVF. First time I had four embryos, the second time I had three. So my first round of IVF I had a loss and then three failed transfers. And then my second round of IVF I had a loss in November and got pregnant with my daughter in December. And then we have one more frozen embryo that we don't really know what's going to happen with it, and there's a lot going on right now that it's scary.

Speaker 2: 13:22

So scary. I'll say that I am extremely, extremely, extremely blessed to where one. I know that my embryo is in the best hands and that if anything was to happen, they would tell me and then two, I have my baby girl in my arms right now, to where it's not something that I'm in the middle of, and I feel so much for those people that are in it and have those fears of anything.

Speaker 2: 13:57

You know any, any pauses. I know what that was like during COVID, but this isn't COVID, you know like this is a totally different atmosphere. So, um, so she's here. I'm glad she's here.

Speaker 1: 14:15

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 14:16

And we got through what we got through. It was about six years worth of treatment. My God, it was a very long six years treatment.

Speaker 1: 14:27

My God, it was a very long six years. How long was the IVF like from when you started IVF?

Speaker 2: 14:46

So I would say we started in 2018 with our first IVF. Now, these are the things that I take into consideration is, cycles aren't like. You know, they take time. I was extremely impatient. That's like the hardest part. You want it to move so fast, but your body can only do so much, right, and the doctors are watching your every move. Yeah, and you know, you're constantly at doctor's appointments. I actually had an OHSS one of my oh my God Rounds of IVF. That's scary. It was my second one, which is ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome, and I that was kind of in the moment. That was my second round of IVF and I remember thinking to myself when that happened, because I was in so much pain. I was in the hospital for a night, like it was a big mess, and I remember telling myself you're not doing this, like there's no way, like if you don't get pregnant I don't know what's been, but you just can't. It's just so trying on your body and I just wasn't who you know I used to be you know that changes you.

Speaker 2: 15:57

Yeah, it does 100 and I could tell you that I'm, I'm, I'm okay with who it changed me into now, um, but, like I said, I'm, I'm blessed because I have the prize right, um, or part of the prize. You know, my, my family isn't complete, but with what I, I feel complete, so it's, it's um inferility.

Speaker 2: 16:24

It rocks your world and it continues with you. And the next part of my journey being pregnant, danielle, it was there every moment. That constant fear, that constant. You're scared. You're scared of loss, you're scared of just the unknown, like I remember. So, since we had lost before and told people and then had to go back and tell them that we miscarried, that, um, we decided this time we're not doing telling, not until you're 12 weeks.

Speaker 2: 17:07

Well, I ended up getting a blood clot in my leg which caused me to have to tell, because I felt like if I don't tell my mom what's happening, she would be so upset with me.

Speaker 2: 17:17

Like you know, these are medical emergencies that are happening, so I had to tell her and then, around 12 weeks, it kind of all got out. But even after that, like I was, I had hyperemesis, gravardia, my entire pregnancy. But I remember there were moments where I would feel and this is a word that people that go through HG use fluffy and that's like a day that you could feel good. That doesn't mean you'll feel good tomorrow, but that's a day where you're like, okay, I'm puking, you know. And there were those days and in my head I'm like, oh, my gosh, is my baby still, because I'm puking because of pregnancy, but then when I'm not, it's like I can't feel her. Yet I haven't felt her kick, what you know what's happening and I was like constantly contacting my doctor and tell he was so annoyed of me. He was so annoyed of me, but that goes back into the advocacy.

Speaker 2: 18:20

You know, you got to speak up for yourself.

Speaker 1: 18:23

When did your first?

Speaker 2: 18:23

loss happen. So my first loss was my very first round of IVF.

Speaker 1: 18:28

Like the first transfer.

Speaker 2: 18:30

So that was very early. So like five, six.

Speaker 1: 18:34

Did you have a heartbeat? Or like, did you? You didn't, you just had the.

Speaker 2: 18:39

It is yeah and it was Christmas and it was like I had to sit through Christmas and New Year's. Like New Year's weekend was my husband's family Christmas and I remember people were like cheersing and like kind of making jokes, like Danielle's drinking water, she must be pregnant. And in my head I'm like little little. Do you know? I'm literally miscarrying right and I try normal in front of everybody and stuff like that hurts it hurts, you know I'm so sorry one.

Speaker 2: 19:16

Yeah, it's, it's. It's a hard thing, especially because people don't know what they're saying yeah they don't in any of it, and that's one of the reasons why I do what I do is to kind of spread awareness on why, um, some of the things you say are important and can hit hard.

Speaker 1: 19:40

Yeah for sure yeah, I've never asked my childless friends when? When are you going to have a? Baby or do you want to have it Like that's your business? You can tell me if you want. And then I've never asked anybody like when are you having a second or a third?

Speaker 2: 19:57

To tell you I've been there though, and you know a little back story is I used to be a teacher and I remember there were so many amazing families in my class that we would like so when's the next one coming? Because we want them to be in our class. You know those types of things, and I will tell you that I have literally called and text or message Facebook, whatever, and told every single one of those parents that I am sorry, like I am. I was not there yet in the infertility like spectrum. I had no idea and little did I know like there was. You know a mom that almost died in childbirth, and you know she was. She was scared to have another kid, and you know those types of things that you just don't know what someone's going through. So know that it's hard to like stop saying like, just normal things, but some of these things are normal.

Speaker 1: 20:57

I'm like 100 percent guilty of it. Yeah, and I was out of town this weekend with two childless couples. I'm like I made sure I didn't ask that because it's not my business.

Speaker 2: 21:11

But it's hard because it's like I know you know you're asked these things, or like you hear them as you grow up because it wasn't talked about in any type of way and like I was talking, yeah, yeah yeah, like I wanted it.

Speaker 2: 21:19

It's also like yeah because it's not my business. No, but that's true, but it, but still like you also care. Yeah, yeah and that's true, but still like you also care. Yeah, and that's what also makes it difficult is because you're like you know, I would love to hold another baby of somebody that I care about. You know, like those types of things, that, but it's still not.

Speaker 2: 21:38

You know still not okay, right, but I think that that's kind of where it falls into, like people don't understand because they just care, but they just don't know how to say it.

Speaker 1: 21:51

Yeah, you know yeah, and you are like going through IVF, which is extremely, yeah, you know, sacred thing between you and your partner. You're like you're going through so much, yeah, and no one knows. No one knows, no one knows.

Speaker 2: 22:09

Yeah, and you know I can even shout to the rooftops that I'm doing it, but no one's going to understand it if they haven't been through it.

Speaker 2: 22:22

Yeah, with relation like infertility impacts so much of your life, relationships, um, you know the emotional toll, the financial toll, the stigmas and misconceptions, those types of things like it. It affects every being of your life and you're constantly reminded constantly reminded me of Nancy, posts on Facebook and you know like it's just, it's, it's hard and you know had so many conversations with friends and family, fallouts with friends and family because I have to protect my mental health at the same time, like I know that people want you know what's good for you, but you are the only you know what's good for you, but you are the only one that actually knows what's good for you. I remember having like a conversation with a friend of mine because I had just gotten a call about a announce of a very close family member and they didn't tell me that they were pregnant. I found out through someone else who slipped up and then saw an announcement on and it hit me because it's like you guys know, you know what I'm going through.

Speaker 2: 23:39

And so I called one of my friends and I was bawling, just crying my eyes out, like I hate this, like I don't want to go through eyes out, like I hate this, like I don't want to go through this anymore, like I'm so angry and it isn't angry at anybody for being pregnant, because that's a beautiful thing, but I'm angry that it wasn't me. Yeah, you know I'm happy for them, but it wasn't me. And that person on the other line said you really need some therapy. And I remember bawling even harder and hanging up the phone like I probably do need therapy and I suggest anyone get it if they need it. But in that moment I just wanted validation. You know, like I just needed someone to listen.

Speaker 1: 24:24

You said, like I understand, yeah, but this is somebody who you know.

Speaker 2: 24:26

Like I just needed someone to listen. I understand, yeah, but this is somebody who got pregnant easily, you know, and it's like I don't think that, like I said, I can show you that I'm giving myself shots every night. I can you know those types of things, but I don't think anyone really understands unless they've actually done it, you know, and that's for a lot of things in life, you know. So I think that to protect that's important too.

Speaker 1: 24:56

Yeah how did you? Did you go to therapy?

Speaker 2: 25:02

um, so I will tell you I do now, okay, um, back then I felt like I could do it by myself and I felt like me and my husband could do it make sense but I don't know if that's because of the stigma on therapy too, you know, um, like that there was really something wrong with me, when I already knew there was something wrong with me physically, yeah, and I'm reminded of that every day, and that my body is just not doing what a woman is actually supposed to do. But I didn't want to think of something else that I that was wrong. That makes sense.

Speaker 1: 25:43

You know I get it. That's a lot.

Speaker 2: 25:46

Yeah, and I mean I will tell you, though having a therapist is incredible. You may cry for an hour, but you will feel so good after that you know like it will feel so great and, um, I am an advocate for definitely asking for help, um, and I don't know if we want to go back into my journey, but I will tell you that postpartum definitely kicked my butt too, so I Ditto.

Speaker 1: 26:15

I was too yeah.

Speaker 2: 26:17

I 100% say tell your doctor you need help, Because at first I didn't and I was like she just came home from NICU. Be my baby's home, I was not okay.

Speaker 1: 26:34

One of my best friends is pregnant right now and I was like she's like, like what are like three to five items you think I need? And I was like I'm a second time mom and all I can say is support, get yourself a therapist yeah, right now get yourself a postpartum doula, do it. Don't even worry about the big items. But here are some other items.

Speaker 2: 26:54

Yeah well, it's like you, that's. Another thing is you don't think you're gonna get it or deal with postpartum right like I. I knew with my journey and how it went and then how I was so scared all the time when I wasn't sick and feeling like I could lose her in any type of manner I knew I, immediately before she even came out, I was like, can we talk about, you know, placenta encapsulation, because I hear that it helps with postpartum depression. I kind of have a feeling that I'm going to have an issue and with what happened to me you can go and say that I ended up having help syndrome, and what makes you one feel better from HG is the placenta being completely out of your body.

Speaker 2: 27:45

So once that's gone, you typically feel absolutely amazing. So she was like do you really want to put that back in your body? Good point, I didn't think about that part.

Speaker 2: 27:58

And I couldn't find any studies on it, but that's logical. So that kind of was in the back of my head like maybe. But then when I ended up going to the hospital with like chest pain and then told I'm not leaving the hospital until she's born and that we needed to have an emergency C-section, lost that like option. I guess because it was not discussed and it it. It was more about saving my life than it was. Yeah, do you want?

Speaker 2: 28:34

to encapsulate your bliss do you want to eat it later, like I want you to be able to be here to eat it later yeah, how did you feel when that moment came, when you were like how to go into the c-section?

Speaker 2: 28:49

so I'll say it's kind of a blur. It all happened so fast, even though it didn't really happen fast. And I say that because I was on blood thinners like my entire pregnancy because of the blood clot. So I was on the horrible lovinox shot belly how do you even give a shot to your belly? That's like super pregnant. Anyways, it happens Wow, and they burn too.

Speaker 2: 29:14

But I had had it right before I came to the hospital. So basically, I felt this weird pain in my chest, like it was like in the middle of my chest and it felt like heartburn kind of. Then my shoulder started aching and I'm like okay, I'm already super uncomfortable in pregnancy. I'm 35 weeks, almost to the day, like I was a day away and my doctor I called my doctor and she was like heartburn, you know. And at that point I kept thinking to myself like I'm just throwing these doctors, you know, like I'm just and we don't have to go into that. But I did previously change my. So at 30 weeks I was told that my doctor's no longer doing practice anymore and that I needed to find a new one great, Danielle.

Speaker 2: 30:06

Danielle, you had put everyone, I'm telling you like it was like literally, and you know I will say that I feel like it was, um, he didn't really listen to me. And I went through it from a fertility clinic that literally was there every second I text them. I called them, they answered. And then I went through it from a fertility clinic that literally was there every second I text them. I called them, they answered. And then I went to an OB that was like you're sick, eat some Pedialyte popsicles, you'll be good. You know, like things like that. I mean texting him like no, I need something better. And he's like I still think you should just eat Pedialyte popsicles.

Speaker 1: 30:44

Did they ever give you any? Yes?

Speaker 2: 30:47

Anti-nausea. So I ended up I was in the hospital probably every other week getting fluids. Finally, I bothered him so much that he approved home health care. So I ended up having home health care come out and I had IVs every day.

Speaker 1: 31:03

That's great, but not great too.

Speaker 2: 31:07

We can check some more boxes if you want. Yeah, so I ended up having them come out and my veins kept blowing and they have to call them again and they have to come out again. And then finally I said I don't want this anymore, I'm done with it. That was probably around like 30 weeks, I think, um, and so I was like, if I, if I have to, I'll just go back to the hospital.

Speaker 2: 31:30

I don't want to deal with this at home. They're constantly trying to prick me. I'm dehydrated, you can't get a. You know what I'm saying? Like it's just, it was a lot and um, so the home health care happened, then I, I okay. So this is where we were at with my chest pain.

Speaker 1: 31:48

Did I skip something. No, okay, no, I think I went backwards, okay.

Speaker 2: 31:54

So the chest pain, and then my shoulder was hurting. I will give my mother credit right now because she told me to call my doctor, because she tells me that all the time I told you you should have called it and she did so. Thanks, mom. But I called the doctor and they were like you know what, maybe it is, but let's check, let's see, you know. So I got up, went to the hospital and they did some blood work. Of course, you know you got to get the covid covid test. Now, that's the thing, um.

Speaker 2: 32:27

And then the doctor came in and she was like, can I ask you a few more questions? And I'm like she's like, tell me where this pain is? But I'm a little confused. I'm like, okay, started telling her. It's like just in the middle of my chest, kind of like in my feels, like it's in the middle of my ribs. And she was like are you sure it's right there? And I think so, um, and she came back. She left and then came back and was like I'm contacting your doctor. And I was like, oh and um, she's like well, I'm gonna have a, an ultrasound sonographer. Come in, um, we are going to do some looking, because it looks as if your liver is failing and we need to like really keep you until the baby's here and in my head I'm like okay, baby shoot, I'm 35.

Speaker 2: 33:23

We were going to take her at 37 anyways, because of my blood clot. You have to in case of a C-section. You have to take it Because you can't be on blood thinners for 12 hours or something along those lines. And that's what kind of why I said that it wasn't. It felt like it was fast. It really wasn't fast because I had to wait, yeah, but she came in and she was like yep, so you have help syndrome and I looked that up and I believe it's like one in a million chance or something along those lines. And I'm sorry if I'm wrong on that, but I remember looking at it like Danielle, literally everything that you can, you are one in a million right now, okay, and I remember looking at that like I feel like I don't really in that moment I didn't realize how bad it was. But now I look back at it and I'm going to be honest like I'll look at different things about HELP syndrome, which is H-E-L-L-P and I don't know what the like something elevated liver enzymes, something along those lines.

Speaker 2: 34:29

But I'll tell you, it is the extreme of preeclampsia hemoglobin right elevated liver, liver, and then I don't know what the I don't know but it is the most extreme of preeclampsia.

Speaker 1: 34:50

It's very dangerous. Yeah, for you. Yeah, the only cure for it is to deliver your baby.

Speaker 2: 34:56

Yes, yeah, yes. So I remember my doctor coming in. She came in immediately. I mean, she was on call. She came in and she was like I'm giving you two choices, right? One I thought I was staying until 37 weeks just in the hospital. That was like my immediate thought, like okay, I can do that. I meant I mean I was at home all the entire pregnancy. Anyways, I didn't even go to work like the whole eight months because I was so sick and um, yeah, I was was like okay, cool, we'll just sit in the hospital for a couple weeks.

Speaker 1: 35:30

Yeah, I know what this is like.

Speaker 2: 35:31

Yeah, no, that didn't mean that. My doctor came in and said look, I'm going to give you two options. One, you can have your baby at 11pm tonight. Or two, we can wait until the medication your blood thinners wear off, because we have to, and then we can induce you In that option. I need you to know that if you're induced and you go through contractions and all of that stuff, but we keep checking your liver enzymes and they're dropping even more or raising whatever, whichever one was happening to me we're just going to take your baby anyways. And so it was like do you want to go through pain and have contractions and do all of that? No, I don't, sorry.

Speaker 1: 36:24

Have you gone through enough at this point? Like I don't, I don't, Sorry. Have you gone through enough at this?

Speaker 2: 36:27

point, like I don't, I don't, and I remember thinking to myself like I already know the answer to this, but she was like I'm going to let you sit. So she did, and me and my husband had some good conversations. I did decide to do the C-section no-transcript and, as a mom who would you choose Always the baby Good question.

Speaker 1: 37:09

Like I mean like as a mom, you're like, I've just grown it. What about my other child? Oh, 100%, that's true, you know that's a hard decision to make. I feel, like as a mom, like we're always thinking about somebody else.

Speaker 2: 37:21

Yeah, that's just how I feel like we are Well and you know I don't have any other kids, so that wasn't even you know something on my mind. My mind is I, I worked really hard. Can she just live? You know, but of course my husband's first response is oh no, it's you babe yeah. You know, and they ended up giving me a bag of magnesium and apparently when you have help syndrome you are you have extremely high chances of seizure, and so they gave me that. Sorry if I didn't say that loud enough.

Speaker 1: 38:00

I don't?

Speaker 2: 38:00

you know I don't remember much else because magnesium, apparently it takes you out. Yeah, that shit makes you loopy, loopy. She was like I don't even know if you're going to be able to stand up, so you might just want to stay sitting laying down. Good, um, yeah, but I mean I'd rather you just not have a seizure like you know um, and so that since that happened, I kind of just go off photos. You know like I don't, yeah, I percent.

Speaker 2: 38:28

Marty told me. I remember I remember them like I got wheeled into the C-section room and Marty got pushed to the back and was like you need, you need to stay out here until we get the epidural epidural or anesthesia or whatever it is that they put in my back.

Speaker 2: 38:48

But, I'm assuming epidural type of thing, and I remember my doctor coming in and she was the sweetest. I mean she is such a blessing. Like I said, it was definitely a blessing that she jumped in to my care and she came in. She was like okay, just so you know, you're about to feel some weird things happen to your leg and I'm sitting there, sitting straight up on this table, and all of a sudden I felt these like jolts and both of my legs just like jumped and I'm like what in the world is happening? Apparently, that's what happens If you're not like already numb, feel this I don't know, have you guys had c-section um no, but I've had an epidural but that didn't feel like that.

Speaker 1: 39:30

Yeah, I mean that's, it's like a spine.

Speaker 2: 39:33

Yeah, yeah, yeah it was the weirdest feeling, just like all of a sudden. Yeah, it was so weird. Um, and then I recall marty, in telling me he was there and looking back at the person that was watching my levels I wasn't looking, but I could see Marty doing it and they kept coming over like worried about what was happening. And then I remember the entire table rocking because they couldn't get her out. So like I mean, clearly I had already been cut open. I didn't even I didn't know because I was. I mean, I couldn't see and you can't feel it really. And um, I I remember marty's like what are they doing? But literally the whole table rocked back and forth for they were trying to pull her out. So weird was she like in a weird position. What happened? They never said. I I think that, like I said, I think that there was just so much going on for them.

Speaker 2: 40:32

I I think my doctor was kind of freaked out like what was happening and I'm trying to go as fast as they yeah, yeah but I but I do remember Michaela being held up, but I couldn't process that it was my baby. It was like the weirdest. Okay, you're just holding a baby in front of me it wasn't, and that's probably a magnesium. I didn't really have like a a connection of what was going on. Yeah, that happens.

Speaker 1: 41:01

Happened to me too, yeah.

Speaker 2: 41:01

Yeah it, that happens to me too.

Speaker 1: 41:02

Yeah, it's just kind of like a it's not normal, but it happens, yeah, and I always felt like when I saw her I would just Like what the fuck?

Speaker 2: 41:10

Yeah, she's just like screaming in my face and I'm just staring at her, like you know. And then I have a video of Marty, like Michaela was brought from my table over to the NICU team and I knew that was going to happen because they had told us over and over again before all of this happened and I don't remember. But the video is Marty saying I hear you baby. And it was just like I want to cry every time that I hear that. But I don't remember holding her Apparently. They let me hold her for like to where they were just holding her up. It wasn't me actually like being able to be with her, but she was rushed directly to NICU and Marty got to go be with her for a little bit. So that was he.

Speaker 2: 42:09

He stepped it up in the dad game when she was in NICU for sure they had some good before I was even able to go back and be with her because of, um, the magnesium, they wouldn't let me go anywhere, um. But another thing I really remember is, and I don't know what a you know vaginal labor is like, but like do they come in and just like press on your stomach over and over again yeah, oh gosh worse yeah I remember that like oh my gosh yeah, like mean.

Speaker 2: 42:41

I get it, but like I just went through, like a surgery where you cut open many layers of my stomach and then they come in and oh my gosh, I know.

Speaker 2: 42:54

I remember that night like it was, like I went straight into recovery because this was 1130 pm that she was born and I went straight into recovery and I mean it was like every what, or two hours or something like that. They were in there just pushing on my stomach and I'm yeah. I looked over and my mom, who had rushed out from Champaign to get here, and my husband were asleep. She was in the chair sitting up and he was asleep on the floor next to my bed and I just I'm like what is happening?

Speaker 2: 43:23

I don't even know where I am right now on the floor yeah, they didn't have any, because we weren't even supposed to have two people with me because of COVID.

Speaker 1: 43:31

Yeah, was she 20? 21? Who, michaela?

Speaker 2: 43:36

you're talking about the no 2020, what? Yeah, she was born in 21. I got pregnant in yes, yeah, that was, it was a lot, yeah, and that's another way Like I feel like I go so much more connected to my husband because, honestly, like I don't feel like I would have let anyone else see me like that, you know, like helping you take off bandages and stuff like that in the shower after you just got cut open and you're just pregnant anymore and just not who you are you know, he stepped it up.

Speaker 2: 44:17

Yeah, that's a totally different. He did step it up, like my mom was so mad at him for making because, like he would, like you know, when they first. Well, you guys haven't had C-sections, but I'm assuming that it's, I don't know, maybe not the first time getting up after a C-section. Yeah, you have this. You feel like your stomach is going to fall out and of course they wrap you in one of those like stomach wrap things. But the first time getting up is so painful, like to be able to bend, and I remember like my bed was probably like three feet from the couch he was sitting in and I remember him getting up and joking, like he was going to like hug me or something, and I was like stop, like I was so angry.

Speaker 2: 45:04

You have no idea how this feels right now. Leave me alone. He's a jokester, he thinks it's hilarious and he's I mean, he just kept jumping up and my mom, I remember looking over and the look on her face. She was ready to go over there because she meant business. She was like stop doing that to my daughter. Yeah, that was hard, and being away from Mikayla was hard too.

Speaker 1: 45:31

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 45:33

Did you end up getting to go see her. So it wasn't until about 24 hours, after which it wasn't bad. Marty would like come back and like bring me videos and stuff like he got to give her like her first bath and you know like things like that to um to be there, for he'd like send me videos of her in the you know little what they called where that the warmers yeah, like a yeah, warmer um I. One thing that we were lucky with is Michaela. She was mostly healthy.

Speaker 1: 46:06

Thirty five weeks is good, yeah, I mean well, yeah, yeah, but good, yes, yeah.

Speaker 2: 46:11

Yeah, she, she really only had a heart. Oh, I mean, in the first couple of days she was in the warmer and you know she had IVs and stuff like that, but she really just needed to learn how to eat.

Speaker 2: 46:26

She was four pounds, pounds, six ounces, a little teeny baby yeah I'm 17 inches long and she just she didn't know how to drink out of a bottle. She wouldn't latch to me none of that, which was fine. I'm, I'm. I think breastfeeding is amazing, but it is what it is. I don't care as long as you eat you know, um.

Speaker 2: 46:49

So she was in NICU for 21 days and those were probably one of the hardest things afterwards was I felt so alone now in my infertility journey. I felt so alone Now in my infertility journey. I felt alone In my pregnancy journey. I felt alone because of, like, my HG. No one was listening to me. It was a lot. And then now I'm in NICU and everyone's like go home, get rest. How can I leave my baby? You know like I live, you know how hard I worked for this child. How can I leave her? And my husband was on the same thing, like Danielle. I have all this time Relax, take, take advantage of this. You know that type of thing. No, I don't want to. I couldn't drive because I was still on pain meds for the C-section, I was still being monitored for the HELP syndrome and I depended on him to take me Every single morning.

Speaker 2: 47:54

I got up, we were there by 7 am and then he would go to work because he didn't start his maternity, his paternity leave, until after she got home from NICU. And I would sit there all day and the nurses all day would tell me go home, get sleep, get some rest. I just didn't take it like no, no, like you, like you have this connection, like it's like you know that they may not even feel scared. I don't know, you know a newborn, but like I feel like what's supposed to happen is that she's supposed to be, like she's been in my stomach for well, not my stomach you know what?

Speaker 2: 48:35

I'm saying for um eight months you know, she grew in there and then now all of a sudden, I just like leave her. That was really hard, but no one could tell me anything. I was there, the nurses kept one of them. One thing that she kept telling me was you're going to spoil this baby like stop holding her. Oh my gosh, I was so mad. First of all, my baby is literally like the teeniest little thing like yeah, she needs her. Yeah, well, and I still do yes, you know spoiled oh just give them all that oh they need it.

Speaker 1: 49:17

Holding a baby is like my biggest pride. Yeah, I remember walking into the doctor's office last week and I was like my baby.

Speaker 2: 49:26

No, but that's true. I felt like once I got pregnant I was like, do I get to put the mama shirts yet. And then, once she was born, I'm loud and proud. You better believe it. You will see everything. My keychain said mom on it like all this stuff, like I was like this is my baby, my baby. Yes, I was very proud of of being able to hold that title.

Speaker 1: 49:56

I worked for that yeah, you did, I love it. Yeah, I was postpartum that was rough.

Speaker 2: 50:05

Now, like, like I said in the beginning, I it was just kind of like you know, I'm sad because I don't want to be away from a kid, so I felt like that was something. That was like, okay, that's a normal feeling, yeah, um, I think life was happening really fast and I didn't really sit down and think like, oh my gosh, I think I have a problem, you know there's something wrong. But then she came home 21 days. I had my doctor's appointment somewhere around that time that she came home and I remember telling the doctor like, oh my gosh, I'm so happy, like she's everything, like you know, no worry. Oh my gosh, I'm so happy, like she's everything, like you know, no worries, she's home now, like that's all that matters. I was sad, but she's home.

Speaker 2: 50:52

And then about a week later I ended up calling my doctor back and said we need to talk, because this is not okay. I am so scared of something happening to her. I am so like I don't want people to really touch her because I'm scared they're gonna drop her. I'm like there are these things, these like intrusive thoughts that are going through my mind and nothing like to where. You know, my postpartum was not like. You know I'm gonna'm going to hurt my child, or you know I don't want to be around her because there's levels to it. Right, this was more so, just like I'm scared of losing her and from experiencing loss multiple times Kind of makes sense.

Speaker 2: 51:41

But it was like little things, like I'd be driving in the car or riding in the car and I'm like, oh my gosh, what if that car hits the side of me? And then like, just like these things that just roll through my mind, like, and then I don't make it home and then she doesn't have a mom, and then you know, like it just it, just it was constant and it was nice. I got to stay home for another six weeks after she was came home from NICU, so like I got a good time with her. But that was hard too, going to work, like being away, dropping her off to somebody I don't even know, at daycare, you know. And so, yeah, I called her and she said I'm so glad that you called me, let's get you on something, let's try some things out. And I'm somewhat okay today. I'm somewhat okay.

Speaker 2: 52:40

I love how you just like your face you made yeah, cute um somewhat yeah, um, I, I still struggle, I still struggle and that could also be um, with what I do now, with making a miracle, because I am and my husband tells me all the time like you get so stressed out around like events and stuff like that. Because I feel like you're, you know, you're talking to media, you're, you know, telling your story over and over again and talking to other people, like are you not like, just like triggering yourself, like what are you doing? Um, but I find it therapeutic in some ways, you're also empowering so many.

Speaker 1: 53:20

yeah, thank you.

Speaker 2: 53:21

Yeah, thank you Like this connection that I have, that this being is mine and I'm going to raise her in the way that I want to raise her Like she's just everything. And I thought to myself over and over again like, okay, what if this didn't happen? Like you know, your last try? Like what if you still didn't have a baby? How would that feel? Like I just want to be there for somebody that's going through this.

Speaker 2: 54:08

Yeah, so, around her transversary date, so, which was December 19th, 2020. It was the same night as the Christmas star, the Jupiter, the retrograde, yeah, yeah. We went out and took pictures and everything like this transfer is going to work because those stars look like Christmas star, but yeah, so we, we started to take gifts to my fertility clinic and it was kind of just like you know, I wanted to do something with me and Mikayla, because this is special for us. I don't want to put my journey on her in any type of way, and this is something I've battled with, because just because that's my story doesn't necessarily mean it has to be hers. And I really battle that only because I want her to. I don't know, like I want her to know what happened, but I don't want it to define her, does that?

Speaker 2: 55:12

make sense yeah um, wait, this was something that I was just like. You know, I can show my kid how to empower people. She's only like three months old, but we, we got this, and so we started taking presents. I decided to create some coloring books on.

Speaker 1: 55:34

Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 2: 55:37

And so the first ones weren't that great, I will tell you that. But we started selling them on Amazon and this was my way of being like okay, well, I'm giving back to the infertility community by providing them this book that they can use for the two week wait, while making a little bit of money to put into my daughter's college fund, because I'm broke with all the IVF treatment, and so we started doing this, and then every holiday I would like buy the books and donate them. We would do random things like these. I know her first transversary date, I think. I took the little bottles of wine with stuff to the doctors and nurses and stuff like that stuff to the doctors and nurses and stuff like that.

Speaker 2: 56:27

It was just more so like I felt about being able to give back in some sort of way, especially to the people that one are going through it and also helped me in my journey. So that was December and then National Infertility Awareness Week is is the third week of April, the last week of April, and it popped up and I started like looking into, okay, what does St Louis have? Because I mean, I really didn't know much about resources when I was going through it. I don't know. I felt like maybe I was just too overwhelmed to even look, and so I started like thinking like is anybody doing anything? Is there anything fun that's going to happen? Like I want to spread awareness, you know those types of things. And there wasn't anything. And so I was like, okay, so this is in the back of my mind.

Speaker 2: 57:14

But I started getting involved with Resolve, which is the National Infertility Association, and they do things like proclamation projects where you can have your city proclaim that this is National Infertility Awareness Week, stuff like that. So I started to do little things and then I saw that they were like light your city up, orange, those types of things. So I jumped onto that bandwagon and the wheel ended up lighting up orange for us the first year. No one really knew about it because I I didn't really know many people, and it was really cool because it was like, oh my gosh, they're doing this. Yeah, I did that for us, you know like.

Speaker 2: 58:01

I feel super cool. So they did that and like everyone got so excited about it like at the clinic and you know all those things and it made me realize that you know that that sounds small, like oh, you got the wheel lit up. Orange for you, thanks Great. But it shows so much support in ways that you don't think about.

Speaker 1: 58:25

Yeah, you know.

Speaker 2: 58:26

Yeah, like the fact that your city would acknowledge that this is a thing. Yeah, it's big, you know.

Speaker 1: 58:35

And the wheel is not even that old.

Speaker 2: 58:37

No, it's really new.

Speaker 1: 58:39

It's really new. It's a thing that's been around for too long.

Speaker 2: 58:41

And it's cool when they do things like that. You know they do like gender reveal things yeah.

Speaker 1: 58:46

Yeah, crazy.

Speaker 2: 58:49

But they were doing it for free, you know. So it was like nothing that I had to pay for or anything, and it was just like, oh my gosh, this is awesome, thank you. Yeah, next year I'm going to get the whole city, which has not happened, it will happen, it will happen. So I noticed that more people were coming to me Talking about one the gifts they were getting from my clinic and like, oh my gosh, I'm so happy. Can I say my doctor's name? Yes, OK. Ok.

Speaker 2: 59:19

I didn't know if names are cool or not, but yeah, so Dr Amber Cooper, she would specifically tell patients about my special days when I would give gifts. There's a you know I expect I give gifts and then they hand them out. There's a little like note in it from me, that type of thing. I don't expect them to really get the emotional aspect of it, except for when my doctor specifically is like I just want you to know that today is a special day and I think that your transfer is going to work, because this patient of mine, you know like just like, really like putting emotion behind it.

Speaker 2: 1:00:04

Yeah, and I was getting so many messages. You made me feel so good. I was having a rough day, I'm so glad that you know I got this message and I really am feeling positive now. You know like just a lot and I don't know, maybe it was an ego thing, like, oh, that's so sweet, I did that. No, it wasn't. It was just like I feel like that's so important in your journey and I didn't have that. Yeah, and I I I kind of wish I did, you know, yeah, even if it was from a stranger.

Speaker 1: 1:00:38

Yeah, so not feel so alone, yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:00:40

Like, oh, and that's what it says, and I don't know if I think it's in the front of the coloring book. It's like a little bit about my journey. Like you know, I try to put little notes in there like, okay, today is the transversary date, and then, like, it's Mother's Day. So I just want you to know that you're not alone and you are working so hard to be a mom, you should be celebrated too. You know those types of things. I just feel like it's a little bit of kindness so far. But yeah, so we did the books, did the wheel, and then the next year around I kept getting pushed like do something, do a walk.

Speaker 2: 1:01:25

You know, come on, Danielle, you can do it All that work by yourself. Go ahead. And so I did a lot of thinking and I was asked to be interviewed by a news station. Dr Cooper and I did a story together. Dr Cooper and I did a story together and it was about what to say to somebody experiencing infertility. You know a little bit about my journey.

Speaker 2: 1:01:50

Michaela was in it. It was really cute and I felt like I just needed to take the step. I was like I have a background in nonprofit. I work for a local agency that's with domestic violence, but I work in administration, so I know what to do. Yeah, so I sat on this for a while, but I finally went ahead and went with it. And it is a lot more work than I expected it to be.

Speaker 2: 1:02:21

But march 29th of last year, um, we were finally incorporated as making a miracle, a non-profit that caters to the mental health and support of the one in six struggling with infertility, no matter what part of the journey they're in. So it's amazing. Thank you, that's huge Thank you. We are the only organization in the state of Missouri that does what we do. We are the only one. Clearly I say state of Missouri, but the only organization that has anything to do with infertility in the city of St Louis, and I want to go big or go home, but we got to take our time. It's turned into something amazing. Last year we had a resource fair. That was. I mean, everyone was so happy about it. I pulled together people. I pulled together clinics. You don't typically see the clinics together.

Speaker 1: 1:03:22

I know I was supposed to go Ever Gosh darn it.

Speaker 2: 1:03:26

I know Well, you can come this year if you want.

Speaker 1: 1:03:30

I will be at everything.

Speaker 2: 1:03:31

I love that. I'm going to be volunteering on your yes the trivia night? Yes, right, yes, yes. Volunteering on your yes the trivia night? Yes, right, yes, yes, yeah, I gotta get my life together. Um, it isn't just, it's, it's a lot. And when you have a little one at home, it's yeah, yeah, I'm taking up up enough time, no plus a full-time job, plus, you know yeah, what's that passion?

Speaker 2: 1:03:54

no, just like what in the world? Um, so yeah, so Making a Miracle has been doing some pretty great things. We've had the resource fair. We had the infertility last September. That was the one. Yeah, that was a lot of fun. It was more of a fancier occasion to learn a little bit more about infertility and how it impacts our city. And this year, for National Infertility Awareness Week, we'll have Trivia Night I'm working right now on an advocacy day and then we'll have another resource fair and maybe something else in between. I haven't decided yet, but this resource fair this year is going to be bigger and I have a lot of really awesome vendors that were not around last year because I didn't I didn't know to even think of them, but it just happened so fast last year. But this year I've been able to get some things done. It's amazing how the community comes out and, you know, is there for you and donate things and, like when you're a nonprofit, that stuff happens Kind of awesome, kind of awesome, like you don't.

Speaker 2: 1:05:14

You don't feel bad about asking for money.

Speaker 2: 1:05:16

No, not at all asking for money because but yeah, so I kind of I don't. I don't want to say that I turned my tragedy into triumph in any type of way, because I'm not sure that I'm a hundred percent triumphant and what has happened and where I am right now, but making a miracle is truly special and I will tell you that one of the most special things that has happened in making a miracle is a little story. I was putting up one of my signs that I thought I was very proud of. This sign Like when little things like that happen with an organization that I like put together, it's pretty like cute, right, yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:05:57

So I got one of these signs that's really tall and it like comes out of this cylinder case and you pull it out and then you stand it up. And the very first time I did it, my daughter watched me and she we were at like my sister-in-law's house with all the kids running around and stuff, and she ran up and she turns around and someone got this on video and it says, mommy, look, it's making a miracle. And it just like I mean, am I doing something right?

Speaker 2: 1:06:26

That's what I was like, oh my gosh, Like it is, she knows my logo. Like like she knows Target's logo like this. I was like, oh my gosh. And so now, every time I put on it like today when I left I have my introverted but willing to discuss fertility shirt on and the back of it has the Making a Miracle on it and she gets so excited when she sees it and it just brings me so much joy because I feel like I may have really, like, created it because I'm an adult, but really it came from her. You know, like it definitely did an adult, but really it came from her. You know, like it definitely did and I call it.

Speaker 2: 1:07:04

A lot of people try to do the MAM making a miracle, but like Mac makes sense because it's my daughter's name, so it's like it's like after her, you know.

Speaker 1: 1:07:15

I've definitely texted you, like MAM, before and now.

Speaker 2: 1:07:18

I'll know now everyone, hopefully. No, it's not a big deal, it's not a thing, but it just kind of like for me it makes sense.

Speaker 1: 1:07:26

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:07:28

And I didn't give her that nickname, her teachers did, and then she now that's what she calls herself, and so I was like I think that's really cute, like you know a way to just honor her in some kind of way. Um, we're working on a grant to be able to give a financial resource to somebody that needs it for treatment. Um, although, there is an amazing organization in southern missouri, um three hearts foundation yeah they're there too. Um, and they just gave out two fifteen thousand dollar grant.

Speaker 1: 1:08:04

Wow, like two weeks ago well, I saw your like stories of three hearts.

Speaker 2: 1:08:08

I didn't really know what three hearts was yeah, so three hearts is also a dr cooper patient. Katie tidwell and her husband um.

Speaker 2: 1:08:15

They have two beautiful ivf babies and um they give out a Hayden Gives Hope grant every year $15,000, to a couple that's struggling financially to go through treatment, and this was their third year, I believe, and this year they had raised so much last year at their gala and a generous donor that they gave out too. It was a surprise to everyone. Yeah, it was absolutely incredible. So financial resources are out there. I just hope that I can give something small you know, anything to give back. I'm going to call it a macro grant Get it. Macro Macro Grant Get it.

Speaker 1: 1:09:02

Macro.

Speaker 2: 1:09:04

So I'm working on the name. I'm working on the name, but yeah, it's because I, you know, I think if I can go small and reach more people, I'm up for that. So we'll see. Making a Miracle has a lot going on, a lot of advocacy, a lot of everything, and hopefully it can give someone hope and support and encouragement through their journey and hopefully they have an amazing, beautiful pregnancy and labor and don't have to go anything out through anything else aside from the infertility part.

Speaker 1: 1:09:42

Yeah, yeah, I honestly thought mac was so much older because of how well mac yeah, making a miracle is doing like I. I honestly had no idea.

Speaker 2: 1:09:57

No. So I've watched my husband Like he's had worked with a few nonprofits, helped people with nonprofits. I think it's just that I'm an entrepreneur and an advocate by nature and I think that just kind of there's that. But then there's also the need.

Speaker 1: 1:10:17

Yeah, Love it, you know yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:10:19

The need is it's there. Yeah, also the need. Yeah, love it, you know, the need is it's there, it's there, and I think that I hope that we can grow and be able to help more, but I'm okay until I can hire somebody.

Speaker 1: 1:10:38

I can see like the ideas. Oh, they're constantly there.

Speaker 2: 1:10:42

I mean even you know, today I was at in Jeff City and I was talking with people about different bills that are going on right now, about infertility insurance, those types of things, and I kind of want to get into the advocacy game. You know a little bit more, because there are other organizations that do the financial piece. I think Making a Miracle can go a little wider, you know a little broader, and get more of the support in other ways. Yeah, plus, I mean if listen, I don't know that this is ever going to happen, knock on wood, I hope it does, but if Missouri can mandate insurance, that would help so much.

Speaker 1: 1:11:28

And it would be huge for so many people yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:11:32

I won't keep my fingers. I will keep my fingers crossed, but I won't hold my breath. I will keep my fingers crossed, but I won't hold my breath. But we also need people out there to, you know, speak their truth and tell their story, especially with what's going on in Alabama. And yeah, so hopefully we'll, you know we'll find some more avenues of support. But yeah, it's definitely, it's constantly in my head just like going in circles, like what are you going to do next?

Speaker 1: 1:12:03

You know.

Speaker 2: 1:12:04

I have so much that I want to do, but there's just me. There isn't just me, cause I got amazing volunteers too. But yeah, it should be, should be fun, yeah, fun ride. Um, how can people reach you? Yeah, so I am on instagram at making a miracle 8421, and also on facebook, which is facebookcom slash m-a-k-s m-a-m-a 8421. Now see, that's where I went with the mama thing I was. I had mama everywhere. I would listen. I did not hold back as soon as I had Michaela. I was like Facebook name changed and then I couldn't change it back when Making a Miracle actually became an organization. So that's that. But you can also reach me. My website is wwwmakingamiracleorg. You can also reach me at my website is wwwmakingamiracleorg. There's lots of resources on there. There's the National Infertility Awareness Week shirts, lots of different things that you can check out. Make a donation if you would love to, because that would be great too. And if you know of anybody like a vendor or a resource that isn't on there, let me know too, because I love to add them daily.

Speaker 1: 1:13:27

Thank you so much for sharing the start to the finish.

Speaker 2: 1:13:32

It's a lot. We could be here all night. And the dot, dot, dot. Yeah, no, seriously, it's a lot.

Speaker 1: 1:13:38

I'm so excited to see where this goes and follow you. Thank you, come to your event. Yeah, no, seriously, it's a lot. I'm so excited to see where this goes and follow you. Thank you, come to your event.

Speaker 2: 1:13:44

Yes, I would love to have you guys there. It's going to be a lot of fun.

Speaker 1: 1:13:49

Cool.

Speaker 2: 1:13:49

Thank you guys, thank you so much, thank you Thank you guys.

Speaker 1: 1:13:52

We'll see you next episode. Thank you for joining us on this episode of the Golden Hour Birth Podcast. We hope you've enjoyed our discussion and found it insightful and beneficial. Remember, the Golden Hour Birth Podcast is made possible by the support of listeners like you. If you appreciate the content we bring you each week, consider leaving us a review on your favorite podcast platform or sharing the show with your friends and family. Your support helps us reach more people and continue creating valuable episodes. If you have any questions, suggestions or topics you'd like us to cover in future episodes, we'd love to hear from you. You can reach us on our website, wwwgoldenhourbirthpodcast, or connect with us on social media. We value your feedback and want to make sure that we're delivering the content you want to hear. Before we sign off, we'd like to express our gratitude to our incredible guests who joined us today. We are honored that they trust us enough to be so open and vulnerable. We're grateful for their time and willingness to share their stories with us.

Speaker 1: 1:14:55

If you're interested in taking the conversation further with us, join us on our Facebook group, the Golden Hour Birth Circle. We'll be back next week with another exciting episode, so be sure to tune in. Until then, stay golden and remember to take care of yourself. We'll catch you on the next episode of the Golden Hour Birth Podcast. Bye.