Phantom Nirvana: A Dungeons & Dragons Podcast

S2 Ep7 - Combat with a crustacean

• Phantom Nirvana • Season 2 • Episode 7

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In our last episode the adventurers equipped themselves in preparation to hunt the giant sand crab. This is season 2 episode 7: Combat with a crustacean. 

Music in this episode by Sun Umbra and Sagey.

Warning: Contains dark themes that may not be suitable for all audiences. Instagram @phantomnirvana
Email phantomnirvana@gmail.com

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Close your eyes and open your mind. This is Phantom Nirvana, a Dungeons& Dragons podcast.

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Be advised, this story contains dark themes that may not be suitable for some audiences.

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And now we present Phantom Nirvana.

UNKNOWN:

Phantom Nirvana

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In our last episode, the adventurers equipped themselves in preparation to hunt the giant sand crab. This is Season 2, Episode 7, Combat with a Crustacean. So how does this kick off? So is the first, the first step is Mal chucking an explosive down there, right? So Marcus would like to give Bardic inspiration to Mal.

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Okay.

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With a whistle of a... It's a song I just hooked up. It's called Crab Rave.

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Oh

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my gosh, Crab Rave. I was like, dang, these were easier to identify with the kazoo, man. I'm having a hard time. I don't think I ever knew Crab Rave. He's got deep cuts. Is this a D6 of Inspo? Yeah, right? Mallory, would you like to describe how and in what manner you're going to do this? So Mal's looking across the space at her new BFF, Rihanna. standing regally atop a gorok, doing a whole Henry V thing, and send message to say, tell me when to go.

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Rihanna's gonna climb down off the gorok before giving the signal. And she'll say, now. And Mal's gonna pitch one of these flasks right into the center of the hole.

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Okay, let's have you make an attack roll. Using your dexterity mod. Great. It's a thrown weapon. And I can decide to use my D6? Yeah, you can decide to. After the roll without knowing the outcome. The results, yeah. That's a five altogether. A five altogether. With inspiration. Woof. Ooh. Well, hang on, you didn't have inspiration. Oh, the bardic inspiration, yeah. Yeah. Sorry, I misunderstood. I managed to roll a one on that, by the way, just for the record. Wow. I mean, my whistling was pretty shitty, so I guess. You know, nope. I think Amal got overconfident and fucked up. All right, so it leaves your hand. You bobble the thing. It leaves your hand, and as you lean around the rock to throw this thing like a dart... it falls short, breaks against the other side of the rock that you were hiding behind and explodes. As soon as it hits the air, this green fire just erupts and it makes this huge, loud blast sound. And you can see that there is this immediate plume of sand that bursts out from the ground. This gigantic gnarled looking crab comes crawling out and spinning like it's looking for whatever that explosive sound was. You are still standing there so stunned by what has just happened. And this thing spins around. It is fully 20 feet tall, Mal. It's probably standing dashing distance from where you are standing. You can see that its little pinchers open up on its face, like right where the mouth is, and like roars down at you. This extremely loud freaking, what's that movie where they got the fight in the big bugs? Starship Troopers? Starship Troopers. Wow. Freaking bug things like rearing back. And you are now in combat with the Urshion. So let's have you roll initiative. DM, may I cast a bonus action? I'd like to hex it when it appears from the hole. Yeah, I don't think so. I think I'm going to, just because it was such a bad roll in the last one, I don't want to give you a second chance to sort of press this. You're right, it was. You're right. I'm sorry. I'm going to pass on that. There must be consequences. But you can give me your initiative. Mel's hands need a second to leave her face. I feel like Mel also doesn't know how to use message yet, and so was just streaming to Rehana. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Oh, it worked. What's your initiative, Mal?

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Let's see. Seven.

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How about Sam Campbell? Fourteen. And Marcus Burkhead? Nine. And how about Joshua Ames? Seventeen. Axel, what'd you have? Twelve. How about Rihanna?

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Seven.

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But I imagine you were furthest away from all this action anyway, so it's appropriate that you might go last. You and Hilroy, Mikael, Sonor, and Glenn are all bringing up the rear. All right, you're in combat with this gigantic sand crab, the Urshion, 15 to 20 feet tall with a slim, oblong body and gnarled, segmented legs. You can see that it shimmers as it explodes out of the sand. And Joshua Ames, you are first. How far away is Joshua? What were you doing? I was trying to, like, cover it from... With a rope? Like, surround it. No, no, no. You were on the other side. I think you're probably 30 feet away. 30 feet away, okay. But you're on the other side of the hole. You're basically on the other side of the hole. You're, like, the hole is between you and this gigantic thing that is facing now. And it's about a 10-foot hole? It's a 20-foot hole. 20-foot hole? Yeah, it's a 20-foot hole. That's too much hole. So Josh is going to run about as far as he can get. So maybe ultimately it's like 10 feet away from the crab and is going to pull out his hand axe and throw it at the creature. Great. Make an attack roll. I like that. Oh, that's not so good. That's a 12. A 12 is not enough, unfortunately. You missed. It clangs off of the carapace. of this beast let's have uh sam campbell take a turn okay first thing to clarify dm yeah this crab is bigger than the large it is bigger than the large okay it is big it is 20 feet tall and probably probably 30 feet long okay and then the second thing to double check is based on your description Josh had to come around to our side of the hole because the crab was on our... Okay. The crab is sort of adjacent to the rock on your side. Well, if that's the case, then I would like to close any distance I can and just swing this flail into the nearest crab like I can find. Okay. Make an attack roll. Not great. Only 12 to hit. 12 does not hit, as we previously learned. Axel, you're up. Okay, you said earlier that I could use the cloak as a bonus action. Is that correct? Yeah. Okay, I'd like to project a version of myself like closer than my actual self. Okay, I like that. So maybe like 10 feet in front of me or so. Okay. Then I'm going to use my handy dandy sling for the first time. All right. Let's hurry up. Make your attack roll. 24. Wow, he's a crack shot. You hit. 19 plus 5. A D4 plus three. Five. Five damage. A whopping five damage. Great. Any movement? Nope. He's good. Who do you think you're near, Reagan? Are you near Rihanna at this point? Well, I'm further out. Okay. Yeah, I think so. Okay. How about let's have a turn from the Urshion now. This thing is going to just absolutely try to crush Mal. This massive beast tries to stomp you with its big crab legs. Oh no. And rolls a 13 to hit. 13 is my armor class. I hit. Boo. You take seven bludgeoning damage. Oh.

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Brutal.

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Brunch. This is just like, brunches down at you. Then it tries to bite you. And it rolls an 18 to hit, which I know is enough. And you take another, oh baby, you take another nine damage. Dude. Okay, since this crap. That looks a little woozy. Nine piercing damage, I love it. Since the Urshan is attacking someone besides myself, I'm gonna use my sentinel feat in reaction to attack him. Yeah, great. That time, a seven. Seven does not hit. That's rough. Marcus, Birkhead, you're up. Marcus, how close is everyone to the Urshan? So Mal is right next to it. Sam is right next to it. Joshua is probably 15 feet away from it. Rehana and Axel and the others are a pretty good distance. So Marcus casts Sleeve on the Urshan. Okay. Okay, roll your... 5d8. All right, get it. I'm going to try to do... Oh, that's right. Nicely. I think this thing has a lot of hit points. 29. Yeah. It has no effect. The sparkly sleepies do not sort of slough off of this thing ineffectually. Let's have Mallory Reed take a turn. Damn it. Val, who is bleeding. Yes. I mean, two big hits you've taken here, and it's right over top of you.

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I would like to Eldritch Blast this beast. May

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I? Yeah, please. Make your attack roll. See if anybody can do damage to this thing. I guess we got five from the sling, but a paltry five damage. What you got? No, I didn't make it. I rolled an

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eight.

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Woof.

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As my bonus action, may I cast Hex? Yeah. I get to choose an ability, and he has disadvantage on those ability checks.

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Okay, all right. So what's the trait you want to give me disadvantage with? Strength? Rehana, it is your turn. First combat turn for Rehana in this campaign.

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All right, all right. How far away... Am I from the Urshion? Would you say I'm within 30 feet?

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I think you're more like 50 or 60.

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Okay. I'm going to move up as close as I can. So I'm going to move up 30 feet. There's only one attack I can do right now. So I will do Scorching Ray. It's three separate attack rolls against the Urshion. 18 plus two, 20. Yep. 13 plus two, 15. Yep.

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Yes.

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And 10 plus two, 12.

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No. So two hits.

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Two hits. Damage for the first one is 8. Damage for the second is 10.

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Okay, what does that look like when you fire that off?

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I hold my circlet on my head and I scream Undying Light and rays just shoot out from my crown straight at the Urshion.

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Love it. I like that. Okay, let's have Hilroy, Mikael, Sonora, and Glenn. They are going to stay the course with the rope and net plan. And I'm going to have them make an effort to try to sling those items over top of this Ereshion to incapacitate it. So I'm going to make a contested strength check as if it were a grapple. They rolled a 10 and it rolled a 4. with disadvantage on strength, five and two is seven. So it failed the first one, okay? So they got one rope over top of it. Let's see. Joshua Ames, you're up. Josh is gonna see this rope having been secured over the top of it and is going to rush in and find an opening and try to see if I can find like, a place under the shell and see if I can't find sort of a vulnerable spot and try to drive my spear in there. Okay. I like that. Go ahead and make an attack roll. And that is a 12 to hit. 12 is not enough. So I'm just going to flurry of blows them. Okay. And take two more strikes. Just kick it twice. in that same spot out of frustration that my spear didn't work. And that is a 13 to hit and a 17 to hit. The second one hits. The second kick finally breaks through. Bang, bang, bang! That third one. What's the damage? And the damage is four damage. So you can hear that thing go, ah! This loud voice as it's over top of Mallory. You can see it's like bearing down on her. The whole body is kind of coming down, like the mouth is going to gobble her up. Let's have a turn from Sam Campbell. Okay, I know this isn't going to get Mal out of reach, but I'm going to use the... It's the bait and switch, so I can swap positions with Mal. And I'm going to roll one of my superiority dice, d8. And so... Until the start of my next turn, Mal will gain seven bonus AC. So what does that put your AC at, Mal? 20. Okay. Trying to step in. So that, I don't believe, counts as an action. So I will then swing the flail, hoping for better luck than I've had so far. All right, all right, all right. Make your attack. 14 to hit. 14 does not hit, unfortunately. It clanks off of this leg, this leg. big crab leg that you're wailing away on. This is why I wasn't using the flail last time. Axel. I did a quick Google search for the crab's natural predators. Seems like they don't like snakes that much. Oh. We're fizzing off against a huge crab and Reagan will just turn into a little garden snake. Yeah, right? You're afraid of the snake. Yeah, something they can put up with this beast. The thing is that you're... So what's the limit on your CR rating? Half.

UNKNOWN:

Half.

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So you're going to turn into a snake. Is that what I'm hearing? I mean, I would like to. I don't want it to be like I want it to be something I could put up with. You know, it'd be a sick clash with two giant beasts. That's what I want to get to eventually. But I don't know if I can do that yet. Kaiju battle this thing. I think what's going to happen is you're going to end up being like a 12 foot boa constrictor. That's what I would think. Yeah. But this is not a like giant snake that's going to be able to deal with it. Deal with a I mean, it's funny if you want to do that, but if your intention is to kaiju battle with this giant crab. The tiny snake is not going to cut it, bro. There's more options. I will continue to research. I would like to heal Mal, though, using healing word. Okay, in the meantime, you're healing. Okay, fire that off. That's a bonus action, so you can take another action afterwards, but go ahead and fire that off for her. It's 1d4 plus my spellcasting modifier. You took quite a hit, didn't you, Mal? Oh, I sure did. Yeah, I thought so. I'm watching my call blood Six hit points. Hey, I'll take it. Thank you. It's not nothing. That's not nothing. Let's have the Urshion take a turn. It's going to try to stomp Mal again. Really?

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Even though Sam's right there? Yep.

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Even though Sam's right there. Ugh. It's a 19. It's not enough. It's not enough. Mal feels stronger than ever. It's like it's open mouth at you. Oh, crap. That's a 10. That's not enough either. Okay. Mal laughs in its face. Does it have a face? Does it have little eye stalks? Mal laughs in its eye stalks. Okay. Yeah, I think it does have eye stalks, little crab's eyes.

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Okay. With disadvantage on top of that still, right? Because of the hex?

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I'm making the rule to see if it gets out of the rope right now at this advantage. So yeah, it's able to shake off the rope. Marcus Burkhead next. Marcus is going to fire an arrow at the crab face and rolls a 17. 17 hits. Seven. Seven damage. Okay. All right. The arrow sinks in. Mallory, you're up. Go. Guess what? What? Eldritch Blast. What? I saw that coming. You can do that? Well, apparently, sometimes I can't, but let's try. Yeah, let's go. Successful one right here. Okay, that's more like it. 21. 21 hits. All right. Okay. 1d10 plus 4. Are you joking? This crab has halfling luck or something. Did it get a 1? 5 damage. Oh, well, it's not nothing. You know, how do you eat an elephant one bite at a time, right? How do you kill a giant crab? Oh, wait, it takes additional damage because I have hexed it. Okay, so how much more damage do I take? A whopping two. What does your Eldritch Blast look like again? I don't remember. Like black lightning. Black lightning? That's my stage name. No, purpley, like lavender, and I don't know, I feel like it was black and sparkly. You called it black once, I called it purple once or twice. I think I tend to call it black tendrils but i don't know what i like i think that's better when you when you say what your own spell looks like rihanna you're up

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okay am i about 20 feet out now from the closest extremity of this urshion

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yeah sure

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okay then i'm gonna go to that 20 feet and i'm gonna make an attack roll at i'm assuming it's probably one of its legs with my sword named Stormbreaker. This is a very traditional royal sword. It's a curved blade with a gold edge and it glistens in the sunlight. And as I swipe, you just see a gold flare. 22.

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That hits.

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Six damage.

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Very,

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very nice. As a bonus action, I would like to disengage and back up about 10 feet.

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Hilroy, Mikael, Serona, and Glenn are going to work the ropes again. Okay, we got one rope back on. They're able to get it back on. One of the three. Joshua Ames, you're up. Joshua Ames is going to try and find a different opening. Try and find his little crab butt and stick the spear right into that. His crab ass. Crab ass. Hey, quit playing crab ass. Crustaceous anus. I can't seem to get the handle of this fancy spear. I'm used to my busted one. That's only a seven to hit. Yeah, this is an ungainly weapon that you're not used to using. I'm going to flurry my blows, of course, and try and use some spear hands. and poke the crab with great force. That's going to be a 11 to hit and a 16 to hit. The last one, again, you're doing this three strike thing and the third one is always the one that hits. What's the damage on that? That is six spear hand damage. Okay. Sam Campbell, you're up, sir. Okay, well, I got one option right at the moment, which is to keep going with this flail.

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I

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have my superiority dice at the ready

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and

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I need to add it because my base roll is 13. So I'm going to add a superiority die, which brings my total to 15, 15 hits for a total of eight bludgeoning damage with, you know, goose flail. Okay. Eight bludgeoning damage. So as you connect with, you know, goose flail, there is this spurt of greenish viscera that, that sort of spatters out from the crab leg that you connect with. As soon as it flies into the air, it sucks immediately back into the flail. And you can see that one of the three heads on this flail starts to glow. And you may add 1d4 damage to your next attack.

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Let's

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have Axel take a turn. It's time. I did my research and I found the best option for me. Okay. Axel transforms into a giant goat. I'm sorry. Pump the brakes. Are you saying goat? Goat. How are we talking here? It's a large beast. Okay, so it's like 10 feet tall. Yeah, and it is within my challenge rating, which is good. I have utter trust for you, man. If you say a giant goat is within your... Goats eat crab?

UNKNOWN:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

No, I let go of the natural predator irony. Oh, okay. I just thought that, you know, with the ramming effect that it would probably be good against a crab. A shelled animal. The goat has some special abilities that I would like to enact here if I could. So how far am I in total, would you say? It's probably still about 50 feet out. Okay. A giant goat axle starts to charge at the crab. And he's going to hit it with a ram attack. Okay. How far does this guy move? And can you dash and still make an attack? What is happening? Well, it has a speed of 50 feet. Oh, damn. Okay. So. Okay. Okay. Go ahead. Make your attack. I love it. Boom. 19 to hit. 19 hits. Okay, so that enacts one of the special abilities called Charge. So with the original hit, I get 2d4 plus 3, and then Charge adds another 2d4.

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Hell

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yes. And then if he doesn't succeed a DC 13 strength saving throw, it'll be knocked prone.

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His advantage on that strength.

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Yes, all right. 2, 5, 4, 7, 12, 13, 16. 16 damage. Pretty damn good. It's the greatest goat of all time. 17. Damn. It stays sturdy. It stays sturdy. It does not get knocked down. And it is the Urshion's turn. Now, who have I got around it? I've got Joshua, I've got Sam, I've got Mal, and now I have Axel. And Rihanna, you are within 10 feet. I

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am exactly 10 feet away. Okay, so you are

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within range of what is this crazy spin attack that it does, where it wheels itself around in a circle and hits everyone within a 10-foot radius. So are you ready, Sam? Ready. Four. This is for Mal. That's gonna be 14. Sam, I don't have my bonus anymore, do I? You do not. Yeah, that hits. I rolled a two plus four is not gonna hit. Joshua and Axel, 19. So Axel and Mal, you are both gonna take 14 bludgeoning damage as this thing spins around in a big whirlwind of sand. Mal casts Hellish Rebuke. Great. Mal can line that up, and Sam is going to use his Sentinel again. Okay. You have to do a dex saving throw. Okay. 14 and 3 is 17. That is going to be enough. Pretty quick, this thing. So that's half damage on Hellish Rebuke. What would I do without you, Sam? He's incredible. What is my damage? 15 was my total, so... So 8. 8. Okay. So I'll follow that up with Sam's central roll. That's a miss. It is Marcus Birkhead now. How close am I to it? Probably 40 plus feet. All right. Yeah. Shoot another arrow. And I rolled six. So I'm going to move 20 feet closer. Mallory Reed, it is your turn. Well, I would like to bonus action Misty Step, my broken self, away from here and as close to Axel as possible because I am in need of health. How much hit points do you have left? I have five hit points. Wow, okay. All right. I should have cast something. So Axel... Oh no, I lied. I have seven. Don't worry about me. That's my job. No, that's my job. Just to be clear, you want to go right next to Axel. Well, yeah. Didn't Axel just ram this thing? So he's right next to it as well. He's no longer helpful. So Rehana is outside of this action. She's right next to it also. I can cheer. Is Marcus outside of that 10 foot range? He is. Yeah. He's like 20 feet away. Great. I'm going to Misty step right over to Marcus. Okay. And as I manifest, I will Eldritch Blast from there. Fire away. 16. 16 hits. Well done. What's the damage?

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10. 10 damage.

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Good turn. Rihanna, you're up.

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I'm going to close the distance between us to 10 feet. And I'm going to attack again with my sword. I'm going to stab at it. 19 to hit. 19 to hit

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definitely hits. A little damage. 5.

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You

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guys are chipping away, huh?

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Again, I will use my bonus action to disengage, and this time I'm going to move 15 feet away from it.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, let's have Hilroy, Mikael, Sonora, and Glenn try to make another attempt to put a second rope over top of this thing. And it still has disadvantage from Hex, correct? For strength checks. Okay, they rolled an 18, and it rolled a 3, so it fails. And a second rope... is now on top of it. And you can see that they are preparing to throw the net over top of it. Joshua Ames, you're up. Joshua Ames in a show of mockery is going to put his hands up like dumb little pinchers and spin around and then pull a spear out and jab it, this crab's soft under bits. Okay. And that is a 12 to hit. Wrong! You fail. But what about this flurry of blows that's coming at it? Here we go. These blows are flurrying. It's going to be the third attack. Oh, that is a 16 to hit and a 24 to hit. They both hit. What's the damage? More than you can believe.

UNKNOWN:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

The first one is six damage, and the second one is four damage. So ten, huh? Ten sweet, blow-flurrying damage points. It is now Samuel Campbell. Sam is going to look for a different leg than the one he's been swinging at. Okay. Just to see if there's any better luck. Okay. We're going to try to change things up a little bit. And that is a 24 to hit. with the flail. Dang. All right. Remember your 1d4 additional damage. So that's a total of 14 damage. Okay. It does that same thing again, where as the greenish viscera comes out, it sucks into the second head of that three-headed flail. And so you get an additional d4 of damage. So you're getting 2d4 additional damage. Feeling invigorated by finally hitting this thing with a good attack. Yes. I'm going to use my action surge. So I will attack again with the flail. 21 to hit. That hits. For actually the same result, 14 damage. Excellent job. Axel? All righty. What does our goat friend do? What does Gaxel do? Gaxel wants to back up 20 feet. Okay. All right. Take an attack of opportunity. Woody? Woody? An attack of opportunity. Do I need to go ASMR? You're going to get hit by a crab, dude. 18. You take 10. 10 points of damage. 10 points of bludgeoning damage as it whacks you with one of its big crab legs. That didn't last long. Gax was no longer... Oh, no. Have you come out of goat form already? Yeah, that was... He had really good attack, but he only had 19 hit points. Okay, you moved your 20 back. What do you want to do now? Anything? I want to heal Mal again. I feel bad. Well, go on and do it then. Thanks, I'm fragile. are you are you within range of healing word are you casting cure wounds or what do you got yeah healing word has a range of 60 feet okay then you casting that

SPEAKER_04:

yeah

SPEAKER_03:

okay that's eight eight additional hit points okay okay what are you doing for your regular action because i'm gonna sling it again sling it again okay oh that's a crit let's go all right He's really good with the sling, I guess. The sling, dude. He's a savant. Maximum damage. So that's 7 times 2, so 14.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

What a turn from Axel. It is the Urshion's turn. What do I want to do? She misty-stepped away. I am still beset by several of you. Joshua and Sam, most significantly. I think I will try to crush Josh with the big crab leg. Bring it on. So it wheels itself around, looking down at you and giving a hiss and a roar. And it tries to stomp you. It rolled a 12 to hit, which I'm guessing is... Josh laughs at that. Yeah, okay. And then I'm going to make my second attack with my teeth to try to bite you. Oh, and I rolled a 19 to hit. That will hit me. Ooh, baby. Okay, 14 damage. 14 piercing damage. Okay. Ouch. You're a pretty hardy guy, though. Okay, I'm going to make my strength to try to jostle myself out of one of these ropes. I rolled with disadvantage a 10, and they rolled a 6. So down to one rope on this thing. Okay, DM. I'm going to keep using my sentinel since it's attacking somebody besides myself. Yes, by all means. Yeah, go ahead. I'm trying to crunch down on this leg. That's a total of 20 to hit. 20 is plenty. And that is a total of 20 damage as well. Sentinel, Sam! 20 damage. You can probably guess what happens with the third head of that three-headed flail. So that same viscera comes out and it sucks it inside the third flail head and you get a third D4 of damage on your next attack. It is Kevin with Marcus Timothy Burkhead. Does he have a middle name? He does now. Apparently it's Timothy Burkhead. I'll do a second level Cure Wounds on Mallory, which is 2d8 plus 3. So that's a

SPEAKER_04:

2. So

SPEAKER_03:

that's 6 plus 3. 9. Okay. 9 hit points returned to you. That is going to be your turn, unless you want to move at all, Marcus. I move 10 feet closer. You're going to like high five me as you leave me behind in the dust. Yeah. As you're close enough. Cause I had to touch you to do. So I, you know, I did the awkward like fist bump and you went for the high five and then I went for the high five and just good tie fighter. Okay. Mal you're up. Eldritch blast. Okay. Wait, is that what that's called? When somebody fist bumps you while you're trying to do a high five is the tie fighter. We just, yeah, we just moved on from that. Is that a thing? I love that. Yeah. That makes sense. A fist bump and a high five is a turkey. Yeah. No. Yes, because it looks like a... Why did you say TIE Fighter? What's that? Because if somebody goes for a fist bump and you do this, it makes a TIE Fighter. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? God, I can't wait to use that. If you do this with two hands? Put two hands up on either side of the fist. On either side of somebody's fist. The turkey. Then it looks like a TIE fighter. That's good. The turkey one's good, too. Yeah, why would you do that, though? Okay. So you can say TIE fighter. The whole point is to, like, catch up with somebody. Oh, okay. Like, up high, down low. It's like that whole thing. Another one is somebody's coming in for the fist bump and you slip under for the snail. Are you an uncle? That's a great uncle move, man. That's a great one. Well, all that frivolity aside, I rolled a one. Okay. So I short circuit my amethyst or something. Okay. Well, any movement? Do you want to stick with Marcus or are you going to stay back? I'm staying back. I'm happy where I am. Rehana.

SPEAKER_02:

All right. How far away are the guards from the Urshion?

SPEAKER_03:

30 or so feet.

SPEAKER_02:

Right now it has one rope. Is the thinking that if we have two ropes on it, we can essentially have it kind of grappled?

SPEAKER_03:

I think that it's more like the three. That's pretty standard for boss fights.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

It was sort of a two-rope, one-net sort of situation. That's what I was going for there.

SPEAKER_02:

Perfect. In that case, I'll move the 15 feet out to the nearest one of my guard, and I'm going to try to help them with the rope.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. So you'll assist them on that, give them advantage on that contested strength check?

UNKNOWN:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Which is right now. So they're gonna roll with advantage and nat 20. The Urshion with disadvantage rolls a 13. So yeah, second rope is on. Next up is Joshua Ames. Joshua Ames. Josh is going to do. He's going to stick his spear in this crab ass again. Goodness me. Searching for oil. 17. Christmas. 17 hits. Yes. Searching for oil. An important part that we have not yet described is that each time Josh goes to do this, the crab is turning around. So then Josh is running around. Yeah, he's trying to get in and under. I imagine this whole time he's under it. He's really working the undercarriage. Oh, yeah. And that is eight points of piercing damage from the sphere. Flurry of blows is coming at him. Okay. 13 and a 20. 20 hits. And that is seven points of foot up your ass damage. Wow. Okay, sir. Right in the care pass. Ben, you're up. I got it. Sam Campbell, what's he going to do? The fighter is going to fight with his flail. I'm starting to feel a little bit more confident at this point. 24 to hit. 24 definitely hits. He's getting 3d4 additional damage on this deal. This is a mighty blow. For a total of 16 damage.

UNKNOWN:

Woo!

SPEAKER_03:

Whoa! Okay. Wow, powerful. I think the thing yowls, just this squealing sound almost, like air is leaving its body. It's... Sorry, hissing. Starts writhing there beside you. Let's have Axel take a turn. But he's going to sling again. It's been working well. You're the sling king. The critical one. Yikes. But I have a feature called Lucky. On a critical one attack roll, I can reroll and take the new roll. Oh, snap. Haven't had to use that yet. 13 plus 5, 18. Okay. 18 hits. Damage. Give me the number. Five is enough. Tell me how it perishes. Tell me how you kill this thing with a little rock. David and Goliath with a little tiny stone. Tell me how that thing, what happens when you hit it. The rock comes in at, you know, Mach 1 and hits it right in the forehead and then it slumps over dead. And that's it. And this thing drops to the ground in a big puff of sand. Part of it sort of starts to slide into the big hole in the ground. But they use the ropes. They have the two ropes. They kind of keep it up on the top, right? And the thing has died. You've killed the Urshion. Yes! And congratulations to you. Josh starts up a chant. Axel! Axel! Axel! I think they join in. Absolutely. He starts bowing, doing the whole thing. So when this thing goes down, I mean, it's exciting. This is big for the caravan. This is big. You can see joy in the eyes. Everybody there. Rehana, what do you say to everyone, Rehana?

SPEAKER_02:

Well, after cheering and sharing inhalation and going around and hugging and high-fiving and shaking everybody's hands, in this moment of camaraderie. How much would you say this would supply the caravan for food?

SPEAKER_03:

This is huge. This is probably weeks worth of meat and plenty of tradable parts. And if there's eggs down in the hole or inside the body, those would be big too. Those would be very valuable as well.

SPEAKER_02:

So then after we've all kind of Calm down from the elation. I turned to everybody and I say, let Mikael and Rodrigo show you how to cut off the legs and the good parts. Tonight we feast. And I turned to Sonora and then I look at Axel and I kind of nod at him and I say, can you help find and acquire any of the eggs below sand? Pack up what we can. We can send the rest of the caravan back and take multiple trips if needed. This is not too far away from our encampment.

SPEAKER_03:

You're working now? It takes an hour, at least two hours to sort of get the cart loaded with the first load. And it's most of it. There's only a little bit left. I'd like you to make a perception check, everybody. 18. 24. 15. You're hearing in the distance and you make the others aware. You're hearing screams. Coming from the caravan, you can tell that there's something terribly wrong that is happening there. Immediately, Rodrigo starts to run across the sand. He's not waiting to get on a gorok. He's not waiting for the cart to be pulled. He is running. He beelines it. What do you do, Rehana?

SPEAKER_02:

Whistle to get everybody's attention. My guard already knows we got to go. I'll yell, mount the goroks back to the caravan.

SPEAKER_03:

Hilroy, Mikael, Sonora, Glenn, they're all mounting the goroks. Joshua, what are you doing? Mounting in Korok. You see everyone doing this? Axel, you guys all mounting and getting going? Yeah. Okay. Everyone mounts up and runs, charging back towards the caravan. And when you get there, you hear... The crying of several people in the distance. You can see that there is a woman. You recognize her as Yasmin from earlier in the day yesterday. She is holding the lifeless body of somebody. She points and says, It was assassins! They went for the main tent! And you can see that there's others who have been cut down as you charge towards the main tent.

SPEAKER_02:

I rush in through the tent, flanked by my guard and followed by me.

SPEAKER_03:

The others, what are you all doing? I suspect that we're going to be a couple steps behind. Inside, you find that the keepers of the light, who wore this sort of glimmering loincloth-type clothing, they have been cut down. and they're bleeding along the carpeted floor in the large tent. It's all spattered, all the pillows and tapestries and things are spattered with blood, and there's several strange bodies that you immediately see scattered on the floor. They appear to have a humanoid upper body, but they have the lower body of a giant snake. As you look around taking this scene, and suddenly you see the old man, Ranulf, with the beard, who told you the story about the curse, the undying light, and the candle, which still burns. You see Ranulf standing near it in a death struggle with some kind of similar humanoid creature. This one has a snake-like head. And in a single motion, they both plunge these crooked daggers into each other's stomachs and issue a pained scream and a gasp, and they slump to the ground. And Ranulf, he clutches his gut and he coughs up blood and you can see that he's dying. And he looks to you, Rihanna.

SPEAKER_02:

Ranulf! I run forward and I drop to his side and I kind of shove the assassin's body to the side. And I try to staunch, kind of hold and put pressure around the wound area. And I say, stay with me. Stay with me, Ranulf. I need you.

SPEAKER_03:

He grabs your hand and he says, Rihanna. Your father was driven mad by the desert. You mustn't let the same fate befall you. The only way is home. You must

SPEAKER_01:

find the other key and take our people back to Kalamesh. The noose tightens. You must travel. You must travel to the Sanguine Pool and consult the Tabaxi. They have the key.

SPEAKER_03:

And he kind of pauses, and you can see that his eyes become glassy, and he looks at you and he says, I always thought of you as

SPEAKER_01:

a daughter, Rihanna. Your father, Somir, and I, we were... We were... close. Your mother understood. I go to him now, as in life. He will hold me in death. And with that, Ranulf dies.

SPEAKER_02:

Rihanna, tears streaming down her face, pushes her forehead against his and tries to control herself, control her emotions, hold back the sobbing. This man raised her after her father disappeared. After a few moments, she sets him down very gently and stands up. So with determination, I rub the tears angrily from my eyes, and I lock eyes with each member of this party, and I say, I need to go to the Sanguine Pool. The Tabaxi have the second key to Kalamesh. Will you help me?

SPEAKER_03:

Of course. Yes, absolutely. I mean, that's what we're here to do. We are with you.

SPEAKER_02:

Then I need to consult the council. I need to get my people behind this decision. I need to act while the pain is fresh. I turn to my guard and say, how many are wounded? Let's see to our people.

SPEAKER_03:

So Axel, how do you assist in this situation? My gut reaction, it says that Axel wants to figure out who these assassins are and where they came from and how they got there. I want to look at the Bodies that don't look familiar from the camp and ask any survivors. And what about Marcus? How are you helping? Marcus is standing around deep in thought, just shaking his head, not sure what to do. Courtney, what's your character Mallory doing? Mal's going to walk to the center of the room. Where the candle is? Mm-hmm. Okay. And look at Marcus and send a message to Rihanna. And to Rihanna, she's going to say... I'll find you. And to

SPEAKER_02:

Marcus, she's going to stick out her tongue and flick him off and push the candle over. I

SPEAKER_04:

was

SPEAKER_02:

going

SPEAKER_03:

to do that. I was going to do that. So good. So good. So

SPEAKER_04:

good.

SPEAKER_03:

So as if in slow motion, the candle falls and Marcus smiles. You can see candle wax sort of splash. And as soon as it is extinguished, there is this silence, this incredible silence, until finally you hear like a storm coming, the thunderous stomping sounds. You know these sounds. Maybe one of you goes outside to confirm what you're hearing, and sure enough, it is the Titan moving across the sands. It is that same sandstorm. coming across the titan leading the way and it crashes absolutely destroying the entire caravan people running in every which direction crunching all of the caravan stuff the goroks rushing off into the desert bang bang down over the biggest tent and smash and everything goes black and once again you wake up in the same rock outcropping in the same positions you were in when you came through You look in the distance, you see the same caravan. But when you look at the caravan this time, you can see that there is this figure in the sky in the distance beyond it. You see this huge form wavering in the sky. It looks like a jellyfish. It's got these long tendrils extending out. This big bulbous body hovering in the sky. And you all stand up. you look out across at this thing and you can see that it starts to descend out of your view on the other side of the caravan it starts to descend to where that rock outcropping is

SPEAKER_00:

We are the game You cut yourself The honesty The blood on your chest She is so, so lonely Heavenly to me Trying to lie next to you You're all I consume The end of me I'll travel through my search of you Search of you Just like Taking me by my mind Tell me inside, sometimes What matters is you Where did you come from, darling?

UNKNOWN:

Too good to be true I just said I'll send my son tonight Start feeling like

SPEAKER_00:

I put my soul down

UNKNOWN:

You've got yourself down

SPEAKER_00:

Thank

SPEAKER_01:

you for listening to this episode of Phantom Nirvana, a Dungeons& Dragons podcast. Our cast is Our music is by

SPEAKER_03:

Our music is by