Teaching Our Children to Honor Authority: Why It Matters and How to Begin

In this episode, I’m sharing why I teach my children to honor and respect authority—and why it matters for their hearts, their futures, and their walk with God. We’ll talk about what it really means to honor authority, how to teach this in practical, everyday ways, and how our own relationship with authority shapes our parenting. I pray this will encourage you and offer wisdom as you walk this journey with your family.

Chapters

• 2:25 Welcome and Family Vacation Plans
• 3:31 God as Source of All Authority
• 5:04 Healing from Authority Abuse
• 8:47 Teaching Respect Through Family Dynamics
• 14:21 Honoring Community and Political Leaders
• 17:48 Biblical Wisdom on Authority
• 21:02 Being Respectful While Standing Firm
• 22:42 Closing Thoughts and Request

Transcript

Audrey: 1:13

Hello friends, welcome back to Grace From my Home. I'm Audrey McCracken and I am so blessed to be back with you again this week. I hope that you're enjoying your summer. We are. We're going on vacation next week my whole family and I'm looking forward to that. I don't know how many more years they'll they'll go with us. I hope it's forever, but you know, things change. So I'm looking forward to another vacation with my husband and my three boys. We're leaving Sunday after church, so I'm recording this a little early this week because I don't want to miss a week, but I want to be able to concentrate on them and have fun while we're on vacation. We're going to a theme park and a water park because that's their thing. They love that. It's not my thing, but they love that, and so I'll go with them and probably hold things while they're on the roller coaster. And who knows, I might even surprise everybody and get on a roller coaster this year. We'll see. That would be a shock. I can't even ride in the car without getting car sick.

Audrey: 2:19

But this week I wanted to share with you why I teach my children to honor and respect authority. God is the source of all authority. He is the head of all authority. He is over all things, all people, and he sets up authority. He gives authority to those who he chooses. He's very clear. He's very clear in the Bible, in his word, that we are to honor and respect authority. It's so important to him that he even put it in the Ten Commandments we are to honor our mother and our father, our parents, and so God sets the stage early in life. This is how you treat authority. You honor authority, you respect authority, and so it's that important to God, and I just want to talk with you a little bit about that today, because when you start talking about authority, sometimes red flags go up.

Audrey: 3:16

People have to deal with issues, they have to deal with things because, though God established authority and it's a God thing and it's a good thing many of us have been hurt by authority. We've had experiences that were not ideal. God gives authority to people so that they can protect, provide for, bless, instruct those who are under their authority, but when that authority is lost, misused and the person who is in authority and ends up hurting or harming the person that's under their authority, rather than protecting and blessing, a lot of things happen. A lot of things get turned upside down. First of all, that person who misused authority. That person is going to have to answer to the Lord. God takes it very seriously when we misuse the authority that we've been given. And then the person who has been abused or been mistreated or done wrong by authority. That person has to deal with trust issues when it comes to authority, and a lot of times those trust issues are directed right back towards God because our concept of authority goes all the way back up to God, and that's why it's so important for us, as parents, to represent God well, and that's a high calling. It doesn't mean that we have to be perfect. It just means we have to remember that God tells us to teach our children to honor and obey us, and one of the reasons that he does that is because your child's concept of authority a lot of it's going to be based on your relationship with your child. Now the good news is that God is a loving and forgiving God. He is gracious and compassionate. So when we mess up and we all have we have an advocate with the Father Jesus himself, and he will forgive us if we confess our sins and he will help us, and you know, he wants to teach us, he wants to show us the way, and so when we mess up, we repent, we go to the Lord. He forgives us and he gives us grace. He helps us to do better. The other wonderful thing is, when we've been abused by authority, when we've been hurt by authority and we have a bad concept of authority, there is healing. There is healing. You know, one of the wonderful things about us, about the way God made us, is that we are reprogrammable.

Audrey: 5:50

Now, I grew up in an alcoholic home and my idea of authority was I just wanted to get away from authority. You know, authority to me was not there to protect or to encourage or, to you know, provide for. Authority was just in charge. There's people who are in charge and they just want to, you know, they just want to be, be in charge, and they don't have my best interest in mine, and so I didn't want anything to do with authority.

Audrey: 6:17

And when I came into the kingdom, when I became a Christian and I came to know the Lord and I start learning about authority and I start learning about the way relationships are supposed to work, it was kind of like I was looking at it from a from. There was like a glass between me and the things I was reading in the Bible. It was like I'm on one side of the glass. This is my reality and I see it. But there's something that there's something between me and where I think I'm supposed to be going, and I can't get there. And it's because I had set up these beliefs in my mind and my heart to protect me from ever being hurt from authorities again, and I didn't even know they were there. You know, and as I work through those, you know God says to renew your mind in the word. And as I work through my beliefs and what I thought about authority and how I responded to authority, you know I made progress.

Audrey: 7:13

But then, when I became a parent, I had to go a different, I had to go deeper. There were all different levels where I thought that you know I was free of these thoughts, these patterns of behavior. I thought, you know I am free and you know God has healed me. But you know there's always more work to do. You know, the deeper we, but there's always more work to do, the deeper we go, there's always more work to do.

Audrey: 7:36

And when I became a mom and I had to start teaching children how to respect and honor authority. There were many areas where the Lord kept putting his finger on my heart and said well, audrey, do you do this? Are you honoring and respecting authority? And he showed me clearly. You know, one of the things that keep us from God is our concept of authority. Depending on how we grew up, really affects whether we run to God or we run from him.

Audrey: 8:05

And because I had such a negative connotation of my father of authority, I really struggled to believe that God wanted the best things for me. I thought, you know I can go out and find the best things instead of coming to God and receiving the best things, because how do I know he's not going to hurt me? How do I know that I can trust him? And so, as we walk with the Lord and he renews our mind and he shows us, I'm on your side. You know, the things I'm telling you to do are not just because you know I'm on a power kick. I want to help you, I want to give you the best life possible and I made you and I know what you need. And I want to tell you today, in case you need to hear that God made you, he loves you and he knows what you need and he wants to get that to you. But if you have been hurt by authority, if you've had issues with authority in the past, then it takes a while to get that through to ourselves that I can trust Him, that he's not going to hurt me.

Audrey: 9:06

And so, as I started, I wanted to be a good mom. I wanted my children to have a good concept of God. I'd seen where my childhood had caused me to run from God instead of to him, and so, as I started growing in the Lord and having children, I so wanted them to see God for who God really was, and I was just trying to figure out who God really was myself. So we were learning together, trying to figure out who God really was myself. So we were learning together, and one of the things that the Lord started showing me was you know, teach these children to honor and respect authority, because authority is from God. And this is so practical, guys, this is so everyday. You know it's not pie in the sky.

Audrey: 9:48

You know, one of the things the Lord kept putting his finger on is how do you talk to your husband in front of your children. How are you responding in relationship with your husband? Because sin destroys, it tears apart, it divides. Have you ever noticed that? You know we live in a fallen world and one of the areas that sin really destroys is relationships. There's a lot of things that sin does in the world we live in today, but one of the worst things is it destroys relationships and it divides people and separates people instead of bringing them together.

Audrey: 10:25

And so the relationships. They're so important, our relationships are so important, and when my children were younger, the Lord would often remind me speak to your husband in front of your children, the way you want them to speak to their mate, to their wife, when they have their own family, and that you know that's and that is good wisdom. Right there you create the kind of home that you want your children to go out and look for, and the Lord would remind me speak to him with respect, not because you're afraid of him it's not about that Not because you're beneath him, but because you love him and you want your children to live in a home where we're for each other. We got each other's back, you know we're on each other's team, and so that when they go out and they meet people and they're looking for their future mate, then they will have a good example. Does that mean they're not going to make mistakes? No. Does that mean you're divorce proofing them? No, it just means if you don't have a good example, then how do you know you found something good?

Audrey: 11:46

So I found that teaching my children how to honor authority, or what it means to honor authority, started at home. It started within the family. That authority that's set up by God in the family was where I started. That was our starting point in showing that a family that is honoring God, that's loving each other, then there's harmony there and that's a good place to be. You know authority is a good thing. Parents are there to help me. Parents are there to love me. Parents are there to correct me because they love me. You know this all goes back to relationship. My authority is received better from my children when I have a strong relationship with them. You can only correct effectively to the level that you have built. The relationship that is when they listen is when they know your heart, they know you care for them, they know that you want the best things for them. Then their hearts are more open to the things you have to share, to the things you have to do, to the correction and discipline that sometimes you have to bring.

Audrey: 13:02

Another way I taught my children to respect and honor authority was the way that we talked about authorities in our home. We did not down or bash authorities. You know you have to think about these things. Your children are like sponges. They're looking to you to figure out how to live, how this world works, and what's appropriate and what's not appropriate. You know, when you come home from church, don't bash the pastor. Same thing with school. You know how do you talk about the principal? How do you talk about your kids' teachers? You know, does it mean that you put them up on a pedestal like they can do no wrong? Does it mean that at all? It just mean that you put them up on a pedestal like they can do no wrong. It doesn't mean that at all. It just means that you treat them with honor and respect.

Audrey: 13:51

Another area is how you talk about those who are in leadership in your community, in your state, in your nation. I remember years ago, when my kids were very small, we had a birthday party for one of them. I don't remember which one, but a person who came to the birthday party saw that on the refrigerator we had a photo of the president, the current president at that time, and I won't tell you who it was, it doesn't matter, but we had a picture of the president and this person did not vote for or like that current president and they wanted to know why on earth do you have that person on your refrigerator? And I said, well, every morning we pray for the president when we put we, we take a minute, we, you know, put our hand on that picture and we pray and ask God to give the president wisdom, to protect the president and his family, help him to make good decisions for our nation. And that person was just appalled that we would have a photo of someone they didn't believe was a godly person and didn't believe in what they believed in. What had that on our refrigerator? Now, I didn't vote for that person, but the Bible says to honor those who are in authority. Actually, let's read that together. Let's read that scripture.

Audrey: 15:18

There's two scriptures that I want to read to you. In 1 Timothy 2, verses 1 and 2, it says I urge you then, first of all, that petitions, prayers and intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people, for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. And then another scripture is Romans, chapter 13. Now, this is a longer passage, so bear with me.

Audrey: 15:47

It says let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, but there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves, for the rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. For the one in authority, then do what is right and you will be commended, for the one in authority is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid for rulers. Do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God's servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment, but also as a matter of conscience. And I want to stress to you that Paul wrote this.

Audrey: 16:50

This epistle to the Romans was written by Paul and the Romans executed Paul and when he wrote this, when Paul wrote this, the emperor at that time was Emperor Nero, and if you've studied or heard anything about Nero, you understand he was not a good person, he was not a godly person, he was wicked. But Paul is still saying pray for your leaders, respect and honor authority. They hold a position given to them by God and there is a blessing that comes on us when we honor authority. Now I may have just said some things that really rubbed you wrong, and that's okay. That's okay. We can agree to disagree on some things, right. But the Bible also says to be wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove, and I want my children to be wise Now. I want them to know that authority is not always correct. Authority is not always looking out for their best interest. I mean, that's just the way it is in this fallen world that we live. But I am looking out for their best interest and God is looking out for their best interest, and God tells us to respect authority and that doesn't mean we have to agree with them or even always obey them, but even in our disobedience, we can show honor and respect.

Audrey: 18:19

You remember the story of Nebuchadnezzar and the three Hebrews? The command was when the king, when the music was played, everyone was to bow down and worship the golden statue that Nebuchadnezzar had set up. And when the music was played, these three men refused to do so, which was right. They refused to bow to an idol. They only worshiped the God of Abraham and Isaac and Jacob. And so Nebuchadnezzar was angry and called them before him and said who are you to disobey me? And they were still respectful in their behavior. They said respectful in their behavior. They said oh king, live forever. We will not bow, we will not do this thing. It is not right. I'm paraphrasing here. Bear with me. And they didn't obey the king's edict, but they still treated him as the king. And that's what I'm saying.

Audrey: 19:18

There is a blessing when we teach our children. Authority is not always right. Often they're wrong, but that doesn't mean that we have to bash them. It doesn't mean that we have to tear them down. We're actually commanded to pray for them. But even in our disobedience, even if what the authority in our life is asking us to do does not line up with God's word and we decide it's better for us not to obey, then we can still do that with respect, and there's a blessing in that. You know this isn't taught much these days. Everything right now seems to be so divided, but we don't have to enter into that division.

Audrey: 20:00

We can be peacemakers, not pushovers. I'm not talking about being pushovers. We can decide that we're going to hold strong convictions and, at the same time, we're going to be respectful for others who have different opinions, even those who are in authority over us Doesn't mean we have to vote for them, doesn't mean we have to sing their praises, but it does mean that we have to have a certain amount of civility, because as we teach our children to obey and honor authorities, we're teaching them ultimately to honor God and to obey him, and that starts with obeying and honoring your mother and father. That's what we teach them to do. And then we teach them to obey and honor those who are over them in authority, and we teach them when is the right time to not obey, when is the right time to say no, I can't do that. This is ultimately teaching them wisdom, and we need some wisdom. You know we need wisdom and our children need wisdom and how to walk in this world, how to be in this world but not of this world, how to be peacemakers in a time when there's not a lot of peace.

Audrey: 21:12

So I share this with you today. I hope and pray that it's a blessing and that it's helpful. At least gives you something to think about and I want to say thank you. Thank you for coming and listening again this week. I hope and pray you have a great week. I do want to ask a favor of you. If this podcast is encouraging to you, if it's been a blessing to you in any way, would you please go to wherever you listen to podcasts whether that's Apple Podcasts or Spotify, wherever you listen and give me a five-star rating and maybe a good review. That will help other people see if this is something, if this is a podcast, that would be helpful for them and I would greatly appreciate it. Also if you could share it with a friend, even on Facebook. If you have a community on Facebook and they're looking for good, encouraging Christian content, I would be so honored if you would share it with your group. God bless, have a great week. See you again next week.