Have you ever felt trapped in the never-ending grind of work, constantly striving to meet high expectations while forgetting about your own desires and well-being? I can relate to that (sheepishly putting up my hand).
In this episode of The Career Confidence, we're diving into the invaluable impact rest and play has on your career (and of course your well-being). Through my own experiences, I've come to the realisation (after many bouts of burnout) that true success isn't just about piling on as many achievements as you can possibly fit into your day; it's also about finding joy and fulfilment in our lives.
We also talk about allocating your energy to the right things that will make the most impact so that you can continue to pursue your goals, rather than spread yourself thin.
Taking time for rest and play isn't a sign of failure; in reality, it's a pivotal part of the journey toward a fulfilling and exciting career.
I'd love to hear your key takeaways from this episode, so don't be shy, reach out on LinkedIn!
Have you ever felt trapped in the never-ending grind of work, constantly striving to meet high expectations while forgetting about your own desires and well-being? I can relate to that (sheepishly putting up my hand).
In this episode of The Career Confidence, we're diving into the invaluable impact rest and play has on your career (and of course your well-being). Through my own experiences, I've come to the realisation (after many bouts of burnout) that true success isn't just about piling on as many achievements as you can possibly fit into your day; it's also about finding joy and fulfilment in our lives.
We also talk about allocating your energy to the right things that will make the most impact so that you can continue to pursue your goals, rather than spread yourself thin.
Taking time for rest and play isn't a sign of failure; in reality, it's a pivotal part of the journey toward a fulfilling and exciting career.
I'd love to hear your key takeaways from this episode, so don't be shy, reach out on LinkedIn!
Welcome to the Career Confidence podcast, the podcast for driven lawyers wanting to step out of the traditional path and build fulfilling and purposeful careers. I'm your host, maria Ducar, legal counsel and career coach, helping you navigate your career with intention and confidence. In this podcast, we don't show away from having real conversations about topics that matter to us. Driven AF go-getters From manifesting your dream career, negotiating the salary you deserve, creating your personal brand, knowing when it's time to pivot. We cover these topics and so much more. You ready, let's dive into today's episode. Hello, hello, I hope you're doing well. It has been a hot minute since I've been on the mic and recording a podcast episode. I'm really excited to be back. I'm really excited to be in your ears. It's been about, I think, a couple of months since I have recorded a podcast episode.
Speaker 1:
I went on my European honeymoon. I had the most incredible time, my husband and I. We have a lot of family in Macedonia and Greece. It was really nice to reconnect with them. We haven't seen them since pre-COVID. It's been six years since our last European trip. That felt really surreal and I just couldn't believe how much has happened in between that time. When we go back to Europe and see our family. It does also feel, with the same token, that no time has passed at all as well, because we just have this connection, which is so beautiful. We had the most incredible time. It was really nice to be in the sunshine, to be swimming all the time. I loved it. It was beautiful. We also went to England and we got to watch my husband's favorite EPL team so English Premier League team, liverpool. They won as well, but they were playing away. We went to Newcastle. That was a really cool experience I think that you can only dream of, and then when you're there, it does feel really surreal. That was, yeah, even though I'm not a massive soccer or as a European football fan, for me to be there with my husband and see him be so excited and happy in that experience and in that moment made me really happy and fulfilled as well. That was really cool to share that experience with him.
Speaker 1:
What I'll be talking about today is the importance of rest and play. This is perfectly timed with me coming back from a month holiday away from my daily routine, away from work, away from business, and really taking that time to reconnect back with myself, to be in the moment I've been thinking a lot about rest and play and how it adds so much to our lives, but how little we place it as a priority for us. I'm also speaking from experience because I also have placed a little priority on rest and play in the past, but that's going to change and that's something that I really want to prioritise in my life because the benefits are just invaluable. Now we all know that burnout is so common and it's very common, particularly in the legal industry. I believe it's common in the legal industries. We have a lot of expectations placed on us. It is an industry that expects a lot of perfection and what we're not perfect and it's hard to meet those expectations day in, day out. Also, we place a lot of these expectations on ourselves too. There's that element of that, and then, on top of that, we are in a society. So I believe the Western countries and the Western society really Induction eight within us, this hustle culture, this go, go, go, be productive, be better, be more, do more, and you get applauded and rewarded for that, even though deep down you are probably feeling incredibly exhausted. But as long as you're putting in the output and outwardly you look successful, that's all that matters. Right, well, wrong, right, because that is not going to lead to a fulfilling and healthy and happy life. Also, on a pension that burn out. It's not as a simple of a conversation as saying Work less and you'll be less burnt out. I believe that burn out when you do reach that point.
Speaker 1:
I feel like it's like this really deep and spiritual experience in terms of feeling so exhausted and depleted and not just like you just need to work less or you need a sleep more to feel energised again, but it's this Deep place of I'm not fulfilling my purpose and I feel like I have to be everything to everyone all the time. That kind of really deep, deep feeling. I felt this on so many occasions where you want to get up and be excited, you want to feel that drive and to feel motivated, but there's something just within you that it just feels exhausted and it just feels like it's bringing you down, like it's like this heavy, heavy feeling. And I've had moments and periods in my life where you know I'm not necessarily working long hours or anything like that, so it's not necessarily equating to the hours, but when I take a step back and reflect, it's because I'm not prioritising me. I'm not prioritising that connection between me myself and I and doing the things that I enjoy outside of the achievement, outside of wanting to get results.
Speaker 1:
And what I find is that what has helped me in the past in terms of getting out of these cycles of burnout is literally taking a step back and having A break from putting pressure on myself to achieve and to be the best will be more. What has helped is going back to things that actually bring me joy, having a healthy routine where I get to connect back to myself and fit me. That is getting up at a good time, like an early time, like six o'clock, for example, in the morning, and journaling and then going for a walk with my dog and then working out and then starting the day at work and focusing on one thing at a time and not necessarily feeling like I have to do all the things right now, in this moment. And I know that you are a driven person, otherwise you probably wouldn't be listening to this podcast. You are someone that is driven. You want to achieve, you wanna be successful, you wanna get ahead, you want to be the best at what you do. I get that. I am so that person as well. I really am and I understand that.
Speaker 1:
But when you feel like you're drowning, like you cannot take anything else on otherwise you feel like it will be the straw that broke the camel's back then something needs to change and I guarantee you that when you just take a step back and simplify your life as much as you can, go back to basics and focus on just that, doing that one thing at a time, you will start to get that energy and drive back. So now, there are so many different causes to burn out, depending on what situation you're in, depending on your life and circumstances. Burnout can be caused by so many different things, but I'm talking about it in a general sense today and really trying to get a think about what are some things that you can subtract from your life and go back to the basics so that you can then have more impact in your life, more impact in the goals that you want to achieve, more impact at work, because it's not just about resting and then quitting and not doing anything and just being like, oh yeah, I'm not gonna bother going for this goal or achieving my dreams, because it'll just make me too tired and it's not worth it and I can't do it and whatever you might be saying to yourself, it's not about that. Like when I'm talking about burnout, I really want you to be able to simplify your life and connect back to the impacts you want to make so that you can achieve your goals, because you are capable and able to do that.
Speaker 1:
But a lot of the times we have all of this unnecessary noise and clutter in our life and we try and split ourselves into all of these different parts of a try and please everyone else that we forget why we started that goal in the first place, why we decided to go down a certain path in the first place. We lose sight and that's okay. It happens to all of us. It happens to the best of us in life. It does not make you a failure. It does not make you any less of a human being. It does not make you wrong for anything. You don't have to make yourself feel like crap for not having energy and feeling burnt out. That is okay. But how can we, from this place, pick ourselves back up, connect back to ourselves, create the space that we need around us so that we can have that clarity and that energy to move forward in our life? So live a fulfilling life, because it's not just about achieving that goal and then you'll be happy. It's not about that.
Speaker 1:
Time and time again it's proven the most successful and wealthiest people in life and they achieve that goal and reach that wealth status or that status in society. It does not necessarily make them happier than the next person, but it's about enjoying the process and enjoying the art form of what you're wanting to achieve. And I know it sounds cliche, it's like the journey, not the destination, but it is so true because that's how we tend to approach things in the Western world. For some reason, we are all in a rush to achieve everything, like today. Why? Why are we in such a rush to be? We were trying to cram like 10 years of achievement in one year. Why, I don't understand, because you rushing to achieve your goal one, it's not gonna make an enjoyable process and two, it's not gonna make you any more successful, happy or better than the next person either.
Speaker 1:
There's this scarcity mindset that we hold onto in the Western world, that we have to do things right now and we have to receive a reward straightaway, otherwise it's not worth it. We've lost the sight of why we started something in the first place and we've lost that art form for really enjoying the process of creating of the craft. We have really lost that because, I don't know, we just try and race to be at the top and to be the best, but really that can't be achieved tomorrow. The people that are at the top of the game and that are the best at what they do, they've taken years to get to that point. And, I don't know, maybe it's social media making things look easier than what they are and making things look more attainable than what they are that has made us be in this rushed mentality. I'm not sure that probably has something to do with it. But yeah, I really feel like there is so much beauty in slowing down, simplifying, in resting, in playing, in having fun along the way. That will get you to your goal. Probably, you know what. It'll probably get you to your goal quicker. It's funny how that happens. It'll really get you to your goal quicker and with so much more enthusiasm and enjoyment. When you get there, you'll have so much more gratitude than you would if you're just putting all of this pressure on yourself and being mean to yourself to get there yesterday.
Speaker 1:
Something that I have really taken on board from the European culture being in Europe and being with family in Europe. They do not feel guilty for resting. They don't feel like they have to be productive all the time. They work hard but they've rested as well. They have those afternoon siestas and no one is feeling guilty about it. No one is apologizing for not doing 100 things a day, and I love that about the European culture and I feel like we need to embed that more into our culture in the Western world as well, because I feel like the Western world has swung too much in the other way of being productive all the time and attaching out worth to productivity and going faster and being better and doing more. But being faster, being better, doing more does not equate to that internal satisfaction, fulfillment, and it does not necessarily make you achieve your goals any faster. To be honest and I feel like this is why we are burning out so frequently is because we feel like we need to be going faster, be more, that we lose sight of why we started something in the first place.
Speaker 1:
So I want you to have a think about today whatever goal it is that you have been working towards, and maybe you are currently feeling stuck, or you're feeling like you can't see that light at the end of the tunnel, or you feel like just like heavy about something right now, heavy about a certain goal that you've been working towards. I want you to take a step back and just look at that goal and ask yourself why did you start in the first place? Why did you set that goal for yourself in the first place? Have a think about that. I then want you to give yourself some space, carve out space in your day. I know we are busy, I know we have like 101 responsibilities I get that. But the truth is, if you do not carve out the time in your day, no one else will carve it out for you and other people will take that time away from you and you will never have that time. So if you don't set that time, no one else will do it for you. So carve out some space in your day and ask yourself okay, I've set this goal for myself. I now know why I set it, because I've reflected on the why part of it.
Speaker 1:
Where is my energy best used right now to make the most impact in relation to this goal? In relation to X, y and Z? Fill in the blank Now. When we're talking about making an impact, where your energy is placed. It's not about doing 101 different things. It's not about doing more, but where can you use your energy right now to make your energy, to make the most impact?
Speaker 1:
And if you still feel heavy and you feel like you know what, I just need to take a damn break, then take the damn break, okay, because sometimes the answer really is you need to take a step back from this right now. You need to give yourself life. You need to give yourself five minutes, 10 minutes a day, a week, a month, away from this thing that you've been pushing so hard to do, and you need to breathe and you need to do other things that you enjoy in your life Connect with your friends, go out, you know, go out in nature, go for a swim, do other things that don't have an achievement attached to it, and then come back to that goal with a fresh mind, because I've had so many times where I have felt heavy and I just did not have the energy and I tried to push through, to be creative, to come up with ideas for my business, to come up with ideas for podcast episodes, whatever it was that I was working on, I'm telling you right now, when I was forcing it, when I was pushing really hard, when my energy was not in the right place, nothing came out. Nothing good came out. But when I have taken time away from that, you know okay, I'm feeling like I've been working on this for a while. Nothing's coming out, nothing, no new ideas. I feel heavy about it. I'm going to go take a break. I'm going to go for a swim, I'm going to go for a walk, I'm going to go chat to my friend. I'm just going to like completely clear my mind from this goal for a moment and come back to it when I feel fresh, and there's nothing wrong with that. That. I am certain that when you take a break, you will feel so much more energized and it will lead to one of two things. One it may make you realize you know what I've been chasing the wrong goal. This is not the goal for me, and I set this goal back then and aligned with you then. But I've changed now and that's okay. You can pivot. That's life. Or the other way is I feel really inspired and re-energized and re-invigorated and I'm ready to come back to this goal with that fresh new energy as we head into this final quarter of the year.
Speaker 1:
Do not trick yourself into thinking that you have to do more, be more, do all the things before that December date hits, and that that will make you much happier and more successful with the human being. Take this moment, before we really dive into that busy season of the year, to reflect on how far you've come, to reflect on what goal you want to focus on for this next quarter, why you want to focus on that goal where you can use your energy to make the most impact and strip away the rest. Simplify your life, enjoy yourself, take time for you. You do not have to rush your way into achievement. You really don't. Your career and your life is a marathon and not a sprint. Why would you want to rush it anyway? Why, like life already goes fast without us even trying? Why do you want to make it even more of a rush and pressurized? As I said before, getting that quicker does not make you any more successful and it does not bring you any more fulfillment. You don't want to be that person that is crawling to the finish line at the end of the year and starting off the new year tired, burped out, grumpy and like you want to give up and throw in the towel already, and the year hasn't even kicked off yet. Pace yourself. Set yourself intentional goals that come from that place you know, in a fulfillment of what you actually want to achieve.
Speaker 1:
Do not adopt other people's goals or methods for achievement, because that's theirs. It's not yours to take. Do what works for you. Resting does not make you a failure. Resting is not going to put you back in life. It's not going to do anything. You are not behind. Trust me. You are definitely not behind.
Speaker 1:
The internet tends to rush us. I feel like there was a quote somewhere I read like don't let the internet rush you, because we can compare ourselves to other people online and we feel like they've achieved so much more than us and therefore we also have to achieve, and we start adopting their goals as our own, and then we forget why we started that goal in the first place, because we've just taken it from someone else, or because we want to look successful and want to be ahead and better, and all of that. There's no. If you're going to take anything from this episode, please just take from it that you don't need to rush your goals. Take your time, keep it simple. Focus on one goal at a time. You don't have to do all the things right now. Once you achieve one goal, you will then move on to the next one, and the next one, and the next one, so you don't need to do everything right now.
Speaker 1:
Simplify your life, simplify your routine. Connect back to yourself, rest, play, do the things you enjoy and, trust me, you'll have so much more energy to give and you'll be achieving your goals before you know it, and it will feel so much more fulfilling and it will energize you and it will inspire you to take your next steps from there as well. Life is not linear. Our careers are not linear. If you need to take the break, take the break. If you need to simplify your current routine, simplify. Do what you have to do to help you feel more energised, feel like yourself again, feel that zest again and enjoy the process Right, like that's the exciting part about our goals, because that is where all the growth happens.
Speaker 1:
That is where the challenges come up that we never thought would overcome and we do. And it's just so much more fun, to be honest, when you actually enjoy the process, then you being so focused on that finish line, you know you lose sight of why you started in the first place. If your focus is solely on that finish line and let's be real, there's never a finish line right Like in life there's always going to be something else and something more that you want to achieve. And I know you're someone that's driven and I know you're someone that has many, many goals that you want to achieve and you've got big dreams. But pace yourself. Do one thing at a time, you will get there. I don't want you to give up on your dreams. I want you to achieve your dreams. You're capable, you're able, you're smart. You're everything. You are everything that you need in order to achieve your dreams. You have that dream for a certain reason. It's been given to you because it is yours and you're able to achieve it. You can do it, but remember to give yourself that space and time for yourself and enjoy life and the process whilst you add it as well.
Speaker 1:
I hope you enjoyed this episode. I hope you got some value from it. I'd love to hear your key takeaways from this episode. Reach out to me on LinkedIn or on Instagram and let me know what you learned from this episode. I'd also love to hear what you're doing to simplify your life, to add more clarity with your goals, and how you will be strategically using your energy to make more of an impact. Take care Until next time. Have an amazing week ahead and I'll chat to you soon. Bye, thanks for tuning into the Career Confidence podcast Like what you learned today. Why not share this episode with your work, bestie, and leave us a five-star review on? Wherever you listen to your podcast on, we'd absolutely love to get into more years and help more women, just like you, build fulfilling and thriving careers. Until next time.