Diaries of a Domme + Questions Answered, by Chastity Queen
Strap yourself in for lots of kinky and open dialogue from a Woman who has experience with Pro-Domming and the BDSM Lifestyle. Her live-in chaste sissy sub joins in on some of the open discussions involving kink, chastity, BDSM and what it means to be a good Domme and sub.
Are you are drawn to BDSM & wondered why? Do the dynamics in a D/s relationship, intrigue you? Do you feel the submissive cravings, but cannot express that in your current relationship, or as a single person? Or, are you a female dominant and want to explore that powerful side of yourself? Does the concept of control & mental power exchange, wet your intellectual interest? Maybe you are currently in the BDSM scene and fighting to find joy. Do you have a D/s relationship but need to understand how to successfully satisfy your partner? I have the answers and many stories to share.
It is high time that I share My enriching journey, as a proud Female Dominant. I have been a Lifestyle Domme, for 10+ years & have met 100s of submissives. These, have served Me, looked up to Me & TAUGHT ME so many things about the human mind & its willingness to obey. In those thrilling years, I have learnt the delicate balance between a submissive mind and his/her body and the role I play. My knowledge + personal stories are rich with secrets, for submissives & Dommes.
I specialize in chastity, Femdom, crossdressers, humiliation play, emasculation and have experience in ABDL/DL, E-stimulation, urethral sounds, the mind games that make a Sadist so powerful and the vast Dungeon tools + tricks, that make up a High Protocol, BDSM Dungeon. Consent & physical safety will be discussed. The psychological and mental health aspects of BDSM will be discussed.
BDSM scratches so many mental itches & there are always reasons for those cravings. There will be cautionary tales, that you can learn from. There will also be much to realize, from the beauty that overflows, within the BDSM Community.
I will take your hand in Mine & we will navigate through the problems, questions & curiosities. Even if your day-to-day is vanilla, you deserve to explore your desires.
Maybe you want to understand someone who lives in the BDSM world or unearth your own curiosity? When you harness your creativity & mental release in the bedroom, you will succeed in many other areas of your life. This is discussed, in Napoleon Hill’s book “Think and Grow Rich”. In Chapter 11, “The Mystery of Sex Transmutation” he says, “The road to genius consists of the development, control, and use of sex, love, and romance. “ Yes, this info-gem, is in a “get rich” book!
If you do not have a Mentor, Goddess, Domme or Queen, you have found One now! Let Me be your Teacher, disciplinarian, mentor and queen! If you learn anything from My stories and knowledge, know that what I say, is about loving yourself and that you can do anything. My purpose is to take the misunderstanding OUT of BDSM and those who enjoy fetishes that others may not understand. I want submissives and Dommes, to succeed with ease and pleasure.
BDSM is becoming more mainstream. People are realizing their sexual potential, beyond simple sex. Power Exchange in relationships is such a satisfying way to engage. Any variety of D/s relationships can provide stimulation that surpasses Society's idea of how it should look or be. You will learn with Me, as I take you through the journeys of the mind and soul of the submissives that I control/led and what methods I use, to become the best Domme, that I can be.
There is no limit, to success. As I said, in the beginning, if you can harness your creativity and mental release in the bedroom, you will succeed in many other areas of your life. Enjoy and rate the episodes, if you have a moment. Sincerely, Chastity Queen "Chastity is freedom!"
Chastity Queen xoxo
Diaries of a Domme + Questions Answered, by Chastity Queen
Why I Love When Men Wear Lingerie and Value My Dominance
Stepping into the sensual world of power exchange, We/we explore how cross-dressing serves as the ultimate expression of submission to female dominance. Men willing to adorn themselves in feminine attire—from silky lingerie to high heels—aren't just playing dress-up; they're engaging in profound acts of worship that honor feminine power and surrender masculine control.
I share intimate details about my professional domination practice, including my treasured curio cabinet filled with an extensive collection of feminine attire ready for submissives to don at my command. The image of a typically powerful man—perhaps a CEO or executive in his daily life—naked and vulnerable before receiving feminine garments creates a delicious power dynamic that both parties find profoundly fulfilling. For some men, it's humiliation; for others, it's the sensual experience of forbidden fabrics against their skin. In all cases, it represents a visual embodiment of power exchange that words cannot match.
Beyond the psychological aspects, We/we tackle practical advice for cross-dressing exploration, including shopping tips for finding affordable supplies at thrift stores and dollar shops. I challenge the misogynistic attitudes that devalue feminine labor and expertise in kink spaces. A true submissive understands that tribute—whether financial or otherwise—represents the first step in power exchange, acknowledging the dominant's worth and skill.
Whether you're an experienced cross-dresser or merely curious about exploring this aspect of submission, this episode invites you to embrace vulnerability through gender expression while honoring the powerful women who guide these transformative experiences. Ready to step outside conventional gender boundaries? Subscribe now and join our growing community of kink-positive explorers challenging norms and deepening their understanding of power dynamics.
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Thank you for tuning in to Diaries of a Dom plus questions answered with me. Chastity Queen, I hope you're having a fabulous day. I know I am, and before I begin, of course, check out my link tree or the links here on my podcast. My link tree is linktreebackwardslashchastityqueen. You can also go to Locked in Lust and get yourself a chastity cage or some kinky attire and use my code, chastityqueen, for 15% off, and that is stackable on top of any sales that they do have at the moment, so you get lots of discounts from listening.
Speaker 1:So today I just want to go through a little discussion about cross-dressing. Now, maybe you're not a cross-dresser, maybe you have considered it, or maybe you are a cross-dresser and you enjoy it. Well, I will tell you that I certainly enjoy seeing men dressed up as women. It is definitely a major turn on, and I think for me it is about a man being emasculated, a man experimenting with the feminine side that is in all of us. Really, we were all born with that female gene and it's exciting that men don't always realize that. Men don't like to think about that too often Some men anyway but it is a fact, it's a reality and I do believe that the desire to dabble in feminine attire comes from that innate genetic component that is within all of us and it excites me. I enjoy it very, very much when I see a man that's willing to submit to me and dress for me, even if it's not really his thing. It's an act of worship to me. Even when I would interact with slaves and they were into impact play or they were into any other variety of fetishes that did not include cross-dressing, I would find that these men would offer to dress for me if that was what I wanted and when I would talk to them about it and discuss the reasons why they were interested in experimenting with female lingerie or clothing or wigs or makeup. They always said it was to please me and it was to submit. And it was to please me and it was to submit and it was to lower themselves, which doesn't mean that being feminine is any lower than being masculine, being male at all. It just means that they are looking at me as the leader. And you know, in society society, of course many people look to men as the dominance, the masters, the CEOs, the managers, and when they would come to me, you know, I would know that oftentimes these men were managers and CEOs and in charge in their daily life. So the fact that I asked them to strip off naked and then I would hand them clothing that I had stored feminine attire ready to go.
Speaker 1:I had a beautiful cabinet in my living room and the living room was where I always began my session and in that cabinet I had nylons, I had bras, I had breast forms, I had all sorts of things. It was a curio cabinet. So I opened the doors of the cabinet and within those doors there were drawers, and within those drawers there were drawers, and within those drawers there were jewelry items, there were all sorts of feminine things, and so I would excitedly get up and go over to my curio cabinet and just open that up and I would look at the man and I would think, hey, okay, he'd look good in, you know, this wig or this pair of panties or these sexy pair of nylons. Or I looked to my left, actually, and I had a little area where I had large size high heel shoes for men, because women tend to run on the smaller side in shoes and when you have men coming in, you know if they're a size 10 in men's, they're probably 11, 12 in feminine shoes. So I had, you know, size 10, size 11, size 12, size 13 shoes that fit quite nicely on most of the men that came in. I mean, some men have smaller feet and some men just have massive feet, so it was nice to have a variety and nylons in all different sizes.
Speaker 1:I would go to thrift shops and find brand new packages that were never even open, and I can highly recommend that actually to anybody who's listening right now. If you're a cross dresser and I'm certain you know this, you've been there you go to a thrift store and there are some items that are brand new, absolutely. And the one thing that I found quite interesting are the amounts of nylons and the old fashioned nylons that you can get there that are already still in the package ready to go, and you can purchase them for a dollar, maybe $2. It's incredible and they're worth a fortune really. You can sell them on eBay for 20 bucks or maybe 30, depending on the style, if there's a line up the back or whichever, but they're high quality and and even if you don't find the vintage, you can find other things. I mean, go to the dollar store. You can find nylons there, you can find panties, you can find all sorts of things.
Speaker 1:And I always say to the men that inquire about cross-dressing and what to do, I always say you know, when you go into a store, just go in with a mindset that you are purchasing for a partner. You know she has sent you in with a list of things that you need to purchase and that's why you were there. So if you feel nervous about being questioned or about purchasing an item, bringing it to the cash. Seriously, don't Many men do that. They have to go out shopping for their wives and get nylons and all sorts of things you know that are requested by their partner or their girlfriend or their sister. Even sometimes their sister says hey, you know, I need this, I'm in a rush and I have a wedding to go to. I need you to run out to the store and get this. So there's always a backstory and I'm going to give you an interesting bit of information.
Speaker 1:When you go into a sex shop, they don't care. Really they do not care. You know how many people go in there with the intent to cross dress. I mean men. It's extremely common. Now, if you want to go into a lingerie shop in the mall it can be a little bit more nerve wracking because you never know you might run into somebody that you know. But you go in and I have talked to the girls there and the girls will openly tell you that most of the time when men are purchasing lingerie they know whether it's for a girlfriend or for them and they honestly do not care if a man is buying a pair of panties for himself. They really don't. They don't think you're gay, they don't think you're weird, they don't think you're strange. They don't think you're strange, they don't think you're a creep, it's nothing, nothing like that. They smile to themselves, they chuckle to themselves or they don't even react. I mean, it's just so common and a lot of men prefer female panties. They are more comfortable or the material is much more enjoyable to wear and you know it's under your clothes anyway. So what's it matter Really?
Speaker 1:So I suppose now I just want to talk about how I feel when I see a man dressed. There's a few things I feel I'd say. The first one is I feel entertained. I do. I feel extremely entertained. I love it. I feel amused. Yes, I said that I feel amused, and I'm not, and I'm not laughing at you. I'm amused because I enjoy seeing something so delicate, so feminine on a masculine body. It's just, I feel in charge, I feel powerful, I feel that a man is humbly accepting the beauty and the divinity of the feminine all the way down to the panties. Seriously, not only the woman that you worship me, but everything that you put on is a reflection of that worship, of the worship of female supremacy, of female dominance, of female-led relationships and of total power exchange. And I think that it boils down to that. For me, it's a total power exchange. It's a visual representation of that submission to me.
Speaker 1:Being naked and bowing can be wonderful, of course, but when I see a man in front of me bowing and he's wearing a pair of panties and nylons and some heels and some hair, you know, a wig, maybe a cute little party dress or a nightie or bra and breast forms, and he's on the floor and he's bowing to me, breast forms, and he's on the floor and he's bowing to me, that is the ultimate display of slavery, of submission to female dominance. And that's what I am. I'm a femdom, I'm a female dominant, I am a woman who expects men to bend a knee for me, to worship me, to serve me, to go so far as to pamper me. And you know, I just had a discussion with somebody online and they were degrading me because I asked them for a tribute. They wanted to have me visit them and diaper them and treat them as a sub, even though they were generally more dominant. And I said well, you know, that does come with an expectation that I will be pampered.
Speaker 1:And boy oh boy, he flew off the handle. He said I don't pay for sex. And I said you know, sex is not what you're going to get from me. This is not about sex. This is about you wanting me to serve your fetish with nothing in return. And I don't consider sex, pussy worship, any of that as a plus. If he wants to offer that and I'm telling you, every single man offers it thinking that they're doing me a fucking favor and you know what they're not. It's a fucking joke. You know, I'd rather go sit in a fucking Salon getting my toes done, my fingers done, my goddamn bikini line waxed. I'd rather get anything waxed before I have sex with some guy. As payment, I like to be pampered.
Speaker 1:And you know what, when I was a pro dom, a man came in the house, I gave him what he wanted as far as fetish play was concerned, minus the sex, minus touching, minus pussy worship, minus ass licking None of that was included. And they handed me my tribute willingly, because they got their fetish fix. And I took that money and I spent it on whatever the motherfucking hell. I wanted to Want to pay a bill, want to pay my rent, I want to buy myself a chocolate bar that's the size of Canada. I can None of their fucking business. But that was the exchange and that's what I enjoyed. And did I enjoy my time with the slave? Of course I did. And did I get to know some of the slaves off of the pro-dom side of things? Pro dom side of things, absolutely, you know.
Speaker 1:This man thought oh well, you know, I've got a cottage up in such and such and it's so nice, and you know. And I've got a house that's near you and of course you're going to want to come and diaper me, right, you know? I will tell all of you. Right, you know, I will tell all of you I have engaged in ABDL play. If you don't know what that is, it's adult baby diaper lover. It can be a mix of the two. It could be one or the other. It could be just a diaper lover. I've done it. I have no issues with that fetish whatsoever. That's not what this is about. He could have been a foot licker. He could have wanted impact play, and I love impact play. I enjoy getting a foot massage. These are things I enjoy.
Speaker 1:But my time is valuable and my time is worth something. So he tried to dangle a carrot in front of me, thinking that because he's wealthy, that I want to come and see him for free, and I say bullshit. So I took that over to FetLife and had a little writing about it and discussed it and talked about you know different things about users and about abusers, and because you know, these men think that a woman who knows her value is a user. But I say this any man who has ever tributed me, given me a gift, has never thought twice about it Never. But the men who do complain are the ones that are cheap. But the men who do complain are the ones that are cheap, who don't want to give and who are misogynistic, and this is why I have to separate things. This is why I demand things at times. This is why I have expectations, because my time is valuable.
Speaker 1:So I had men come in and I would fulfill their deepest desires and fantasies and they had no issue at all with giving me a gift for such things, and I think that is the ultimate display of submission, when a man is happy to serve in that way and serve first. You know, as soon as they came in the door, they get on their knees and they hand me a tribute according to what I ask. It could be different, you know, dependent, right, dependent on a lot of things, and I gave 200% of my time, even if they only gave me 100% of their money. Seriously, I gave 200% because I wanted them to experience what it was that they wanted to try, they wanted to fulfill and, besides my rules, my very specific rules about, you know, no sex, no touching you don't look at me unless I ask you to look no pussy worship, etc. Etc. Etc. As long as they knew the rules, that they had the boundaries, it was absolutely fantastic.
Speaker 1:And you know, when I go into the lifestyle side of things and that's where I've been for a while now you know I've got some clients that turned into my friends and we have a great time together, but they still give me gifts or they still pay for a bill, or they, you know they treat me well, they treat me very well Because they care about me and they know that I am giving them something that really is priceless, which is the enjoyment of their fetish, and I enjoy it too. But you know, I have other needs as well that can be fulfilled, and a true slave wants to fulfill everything that their dom desires Bottom line, absolute bottom line. And that's a good slave. And no, it's not all about money for me, but money is an exchange of power. Really, it's more than the money, it's about power. So when they hand me, say, $50, just as an example, they are giving in, they're giving up, they're giving out to me. They are giving in, they're giving up, they're giving out to me, and then the door is open where they can give their body into that fetish to me and I can control that fetish.
Speaker 1:It's an art, it's an art form. You can't expect an artist who loves to paint and who becomes very popular and well-known in the community to just hand out their art for free. I mean, it takes a lot of hours to do a painting. I'm an artist, I know, and I have given away a lot of my art for free, but I didn't value the time that I put into it at the time. I did not value it. And so when you don't value that time, somebody will look at you and say, wow, that took a long time for you, don't you want some money for it? And I'll say no. And then they're like, wow, you know, I like to give from the heart, so that's just a facet of who I am. You know, I am very giving.
Speaker 1:But I have so many men that degrade me for asking for a tribute or for asking for, you know, a fee to listen to my podcast, when I've got all sorts of free episodes available. You know, they, they because it's you know, because it's kinky material. They automatically, these misogynistic types think, well, there's no value in that. See, they devalue kink. That See, they devalue kink. And I think kink, I think a person who is a master over a fetish, a dom over a fetish, has extreme value. They're a craftsman, they're a craftsmith, they know what they're doing, they have experience, you're safe in their hands, you can trust them. That holds a lot of value.
Speaker 1:And to expect it for free, I mean, I'm no philanthropist. I don't have a bank account full of, you know, millions of dollars, or even thousands of dollars, to be frank, of dollars. To be frank. I don't have the time to be giving away my skill set, my love, for free. I want people that know my value, know my worth, and somebody who starts to degrade and devalue a woman who is a dom, who deserves to be pampered, to get a tribute, to get gifts, to be spoiled, basically that person, that man who is devaluing her, is worth nothing, nothing. So I kind of went off on a little rant because on FetLife, under my chastity-queen account, I did a writing and I was really degraded by a couple of people and it doesn't affect me honestly because I mean I can respond to it. I did.
Speaker 1:But the sad thing for me to see is that there are people out there that still devalue females. And this is why I love men who cross-dress, because they are willing to put themselves in an uncomfortable position, because they value the feminine, the dominance, their leader, their femdom that's in front of them. They are willing to go so far as to humiliate themselves. For some men it is humiliation, for some doms it is humiliation play. I enjoy humiliation, play.
Speaker 1:I love degradation and it's not degrading to be a woman, that's for certain, but for a man, who's you know, masculine and hairy, to put on these pretty little pink things panties and bras you know it's silly, it looks silly sometimes. I mean some men can really pull it off, but others is just it's humor. It's enjoyable. I love it. It's funny, it's fun, it's lighthearted and for some men the sensation of the fabric is just divine. Love these things Satin, silk, velvet, leather, high heels, nylon stockings, yoga pants. And when they put them on they suddenly feel that woman right on their skin, they feel her on their body and it's a thrill, it's exciting, it's erotic, sexual, even without sex.
Speaker 1:So just wanted to talk a little bit about cross-dressing, wanted to talk a little bit about making sure you value the dom, the woman. Making sure you value the dom, the woman, the partner in your life, and to know that she's not going to accept anything less than the best from you as a servant, as a slave, as a submissive, and your job is to make her smile, not to question her, but to make her smile. So if you dress up, or if you've never dressed up, go to a thrift store, find something kinky, find something sexy that you enjoy and wash it up. Wash it up, put it on, or order some things online. That's another safe way to do it. Have fun in your kink and know that there are women out there of high value that appreciate you and your generosity.
Speaker 1:So thank you so much for listening. Get on some cute little panties for me. Send me a picture if you want, Go to Blue Sky, or you can go to X and show yourself off in my comments if you want, if you feel brave enough to do so. I enjoy it. So so much, have a great day and I'll be talking to you again soon. Bye for now.