This one was quite the ride! Tessa and Marty join the show and bring their unique perspectives and share their insights on making the most out of any situation, and the impact of small acts of kindness. We also talk about life lessons, decision-making, and the importance of caring for ourselves to combat our insecurities. Let’s go!
Music by Coma-Media from Pixabay.
Follow me on Instagram! @Donavon.Baeza
This one was quite the ride! Tessa and Marty join the show and bring their unique perspectives and share their insights on making the most out of any situation, and the impact of small acts of kindness. We also talk about life lessons, decision-making, and the importance of caring for ourselves to combat our insecurities. Let’s go!
Music by Coma-Media from Pixabay.
Follow me on Instagram! @Donavon.Baeza
I'm always telling people, like beauty comes within, be confident. How can I sit and preach to you about owning your beauty, loving yourself, loving your body, loving you, whenever I don't even love myself sometimes?
Speaker 3:What's up, cousin? Welcome back to Donations. Boy, do I have a jam packed episode for you today. Lucky you, I am joined by Tessa and Marty, two of the coolest friends anyone could have, and what they offered up in this conversation is purely a lesson in learning and letting go and living as authentically and as real as humanly possible. Tessa is one of the best neighbors a guy could ask for and one of the biggest reminders for me to shut off the noise and live life to the fullest every chance I get. And Marty is the guy to make anyone eternally grateful to have him in their corner and is always there to remind me how to ride the waves of life with ease and intention.
Speaker 3:So do me a favor and buckle up, because it's quite the ride as we dive into fighting insecurities, owning exactly who we are and being intentional about learning the lessons life has to offer. Oh, it's going to be a good one. Let's go. So you know those people they just have this energy that pulls you towards them. That's just so magnetic, and it may not even be for the flashiest of reasons, it's just like because of whatever just persona they present when they walk into the room. You know those kind of people like their aura.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I feel like you two are very much those kind of people. For me, you guys are so unique and just kind of forge your own path, and I've always noticed that whenever we're in the same room or happen to be in the same place, and I've always appreciated that I think we're just the novice in the room and that's OK. And you know, tessa, I see you wear your heart on your sleeve and you're not afraid to voice what you feel and what you think, and I feel like maybe a lot of people look to you to be the life of the party or the one that says what needs to be said. Do you feel like there's a lot of pressure to be that?
Speaker 1:Honestly, I think it just comes like naturally.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:I just, you know, I don't think of it that way, but in the same aspect, like when it happens all the time it's like, oh, this motherfucker never talks to me, but they hit me up because they know I'm going to fucking be drinking on the weekend. Like you obviously don't have anything to do. So here we are. You're hitting me up, type shit, you know.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's sometimes I feel. So I'll get my feelings hurt occasionally, but I don't. I guess I don't feel pressured, I think. But then other times I'm like the more the merrier, let's go. You go bald to the wall. I'm ready to see ash cheeks and titties and if you're not here to play then I don't want you in my corner, you know.
Speaker 3:Yeah, do you feel like with those people that you say, oh, you just hit me up because you want, you want something or you want to party or whatever? Do you feel like it's easy for you to spot those people out?
Speaker 1:Oh for sure. There's certain people that don't care to me and you, I'll see. You know like what a bitch and wave at you down the street, like are we check up on each other? Whatever same with you? But there's, there's certain people that you just know. They're just looking for you, for a way to you. Don't talk to them forever. There's also in the same. I have friends that we don't have to hang out every day.
Speaker 1:I don't have to talk to you every day. I can go a year without speaking to you. We get together and it's a true friendship, I guess.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And I know the difference between my real friends and my party friends. Yes, and so I love them all, but there's, like some, that they won't have you back like your real friends. Do rather have two good friends than 40 party friends.
Speaker 3:Isn't that so special? Like you can just pick up right where you left off, it doesn't matter how much amount of time has passed, and you can just.
Speaker 2:You're just right there, just like how things always work to be yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:Marty I, you've got this thing. You're like crazy smart and crazy intelligent, but also like you are very witty. Do you feel any pressure to show up like that sometimes in social situations or anything?
Speaker 2:like that? No, I don't think so. I think my humor is like situational, Like if somebody gives me something, I'm going to like, hit it right back at them. I'm not thinking about it. There's no thoughts in this head. If I'm not in the lab, there's no thoughts.
Speaker 3:That's cool. I love that. I wish I could be like that. I think sometimes I think too much and sometimes that gets in the way and it's like maybe that was a little bit too much thought put into that. You just got a quick fire.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you got to turn it off. Sometimes that's what the pink Whitney's wear.
Speaker 3:Yeah, this might never get stirred up.
Speaker 1:I, like you, overthink some steps sometimes. I have definitely trouble overthinking. I overthink the situation too much when it's really nothing you know. You just take your blood out of proportion. And then there's other times I'm like I really don't give a fuck what you have to say.
Speaker 1:You know, there's just times you there's like I don't know. I guess it depends on the situation you're in and depending on what the circumstances are, but most of the time I'm pretty good about Now just brushing off or how you say. You just walk in, there's nothing going on, you just kind of hear.
Speaker 3:You're like what's up? But you just say you just say whatever you need to say and you just let roll off the tongue whatever, whatever's in that moment, right, it's like the epitome of living in the moment. And has that always been the case for you? Like, growing up, was that always the case? To just be like I don't care, I'm going to say what I'm going to say, or like, do you feel like that's kind of been established as you've grown?
Speaker 1:I think it's both. I think I've always just been very Extroverted person, but there's also times that I know, like when did not talk, or when did not have an argument, or when did just shut off and be like you know it's not worth it. But that's taken me a long time because before for an argument, one when you have the last words now.
Speaker 1:It's like you know what, what's the last words gonna get you something winning your trophy. So I just I've learned as I've grown it just shut off, but I mean I'm loud but I'm also nice to people. I think it's what makes a difference is I. Think beauty comes within.
Speaker 2:Mmm.
Speaker 1:Yeah absolutely. You could be looking like a toad and still have the beautiful soul, and I'm. You're my kind of friend. But you could be the beautiful goddess and have a shit personality and you're an ugly, ugly person to me.
Speaker 2:Yeah. No, I think I'm like, as I've gotten older, gotten better at that, but if I'm around people I'm comfortable with, I'm not gonna stop talking, yeah.
Speaker 1:I feel like the first time I met you it was kind of like Me I just walk in, like I'm gonna make sure that if you're uncomfortable You're not gonna be for long, or if I'm uncomfortable I won't be for long, I'm gonna, I'm gonna. I hate being uncomfortable in situations. I try to make it the most comfortable for both of us.
Speaker 3:I love that. I feel like I I come out of my show the more someone pulls me out of my show, mm-hmm, and so I appreciate that and I I think I've always Gravitated towards those people that do that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you have so much fun. At that time I was yeah, I opened my Window of my kitchen. That was. I yelled out the window in my kitchen. I was like catch your ass over here we're drinking. He's like, why don't? I said I don't give a fuck, get your ass here. Comes run across street and then you know same hours.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and we had a blast and you know what it's. It's so crazy because you never really know what someone's going through. And At that day I think it was like Christmas Eve or one of the times that like I was going through a very uncertain time, just kind of like questioning my next steps, questioning whether I was in the right place at the right time, kind of thing, and To kind of have you yell out the window and pull me out of that and say get over here and just let loose and have fun. Letting loose that's hard for me to do sometimes, like I don't do that all the time because I feel like I have to be Structured because that's the only way I'm gonna get somewhere. But sometimes you just got to let all that go and you very much reminded me of that that day and I Eternally grateful for that because it just pulled me out of that mess for a second at least.
Speaker 1:Definitely glad to help.
Speaker 2:What were you doing that day? You're just like checking the mail, like walking the dog.
Speaker 1:I was trying to just leave and go inside. No, not even. I literally caught him like walking inside from his vehicle and I was like what do you do, cuz I'm like you're waiting for him. No bitch, I'm sitting on it on my counter at my house, but my window is like a creeper window, like my grandma used to scope out the whole damn neighborhood. So she'd like that girl's having another baby. That's her eighth one. I'm like granny. Stop looking creeper on people.
Speaker 1:I am you're gonna I'm fucking out here looking creeper on people. I'm like I'm talking and then we ended up having like a blast. Yeah but, like I said, I'm I'm a very good. I Always make a way to make you feel comfortable, even if you're so uncomfortable.
Speaker 1:You'll never feel uncomfortable with me because I'm taking off or I think about if we're an elevator together. I'm not gonna ride this elevator 20s flights with you and speak no words. I'm gonna make sure that if we're sitting close to each other, I'm gonna break the ice and be like you know, like how are you whenever, like I don't want to feel awkward and if it's up to you, like if someone's like good, like you know good, calm though like I'll just crack a jump to try to make it not awkward. Sometimes it works and sometimes you're still in there more awkward.
Speaker 3:Admire that cuz sometimes, like I mean, I think about that too. Like if I'm in an elevator with somebody, I'm like I should really take this opportunity to say something and, just, you know, be nice to somebody here, you know, make someone's day or something. No, search your dominance.
Speaker 2:You're taking five floors before we get to our floor.
Speaker 3:Yeah, but sometimes I'm like thinking about it too much and then the time passes I'm like well, miss my chance. Of all weather goes that. That's a good ride, thanks, I'm gonna talk to the entry.
Speaker 1:They'll be people like oh, you know that person? No, she's talking to him. Okay, that's probably why my snapchat has 800 friends. I know like four. Literally, I'm like Everything those tiktoks.
Speaker 3:It's like, I guess maybe it's a newer thing, newer trend or something, but it's like what do you look like? Wd YL what do you look like?
Speaker 1:I don't know. I guess I gotta see it.
Speaker 3:And I guess it's like I'm a, I'm a what do you look like? Person. And so they show their Snapchat map and they've got like their whole USA map full Cause. You're just randomly texting somebody what do you look like? And you like become friends.
Speaker 1:I haven't seen that yet. To me that's kind of scary, though.
Speaker 2:That's a quick way to get murder, for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they'll pull up and like, damn, this bitch kind of she looks kind of big. Maybe I won't fuck with her. I got a compliment those other day. I said I was like I know I'm thick, that's okay. And she said you look strong. And I said that's even better because I have a juicy booty and I can kick your ass. You know. Good couple man, I'm going to take it.
Speaker 3:Oh, the other day I was talking to my parents about this fitness thing that's going to be in Fort Worth next year and I was all excited about it, telling them about it, and my dad was, like are you going to get real fit to go Like whenever you go? I was like you don't think I'm fit right now, like yup, and then my mom was like she knew who was joking, like what he was trying to say. He's like no, I didn't mean it like that. And my mom was in the background like smiling, like he didn't mean it like that, and she was like she's like you are fit but you're real small. So that kind of compliments.
Speaker 3:I think you look great Well, thank you, I appreciate it Out smash.
Speaker 2:Speaking of smash, we did that at an ECO. We were driving in our car and then, as we'd see, people like the pedicaps, people like riding the bikes, we were in the safety of the car and we were like smash or pass. But like now that I'm here and like sobered up and stuff, I was like we were only playing smash. None of us ever said pass and all of us were just going to smash, smash, smash.
Speaker 1:For knee for knee bump.
Speaker 2:But I was like not one of us passed.
Speaker 3:What would you guys say is the driving force behind your decisions on a day to day basis?
Speaker 1:Bills, I don't want to be broken, fucking homeless. So, I'm like okay, bitch, get up, you don't want to go to work too damn bad. Who's going to pay him? And I guess I haven't been successful on feet finder, so just kidding. But it's just like damn, how do all these other bitches make money off that? But whatever, no, but for all of my driving forces, I think, is my grandma. I just wake up every day and I don't want to make her proud.
Speaker 1:So, I just do stuff that I know that well, okay, I try, I try to do things the right way and make her proud. I know half the time she's shaking her head because I don't make very good decisions. But I just want to be good, like how she was. She was single mom and four kids raised them all, raised me, when she didn't have to. All these years later and it's just kind of like damn, she's a bad bitch, I'm about to be a bad bitch and that's pretty much what it is. I live for her, even though she's passed away. I just I live for her. I talk to her every day and that's. I think what I strive for is just to be like her.
Speaker 3:And then bills.
Speaker 1:I need some money because I'm trying to fucking go party.
Speaker 3:She's your compass.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm like all right, grammy witch bar. No, she's kidding which bar?
Speaker 3:No, no she is my compass.
Speaker 1:So just do good, just be good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, mine's very much that Like. I need health insurance so I don't die like, please, please. I got to repay that student loan because Papa Biden didn't take care of us this year. I thought that was taking care of me. Apparently, I make too much, but not enough to like.
Speaker 1:You made too much out of work.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:What's your job? No, I want to be talking about it too much.
Speaker 2:Take care of myself, take care of others, my friends mostly. I got a real problem that I like, like nice things.
Speaker 3:And that's all right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm like I have to work because my dumb ass likes nice things. That's okay.
Speaker 1:I did too. I was kind of poor. I have a rich man's mind with poor man's pocket.
Speaker 2:Mine's working for adventures. Because I get back and I'm like I need to work, leave me alone, don't talk to me, don't invite me anywhere else afterwards Like this Stay home, I'm going, what's yours, I want to hear yours.
Speaker 3:You know, what gets me up in the morning is the chance to do something better. I feel like I'm the hardest person on myself. Sometimes I can be my biggest enemy and I'm like you did this wrong and you weren't good enough to do this and you didn't have the answers when it came to this, and lately I've been working on being my best friend and my biggest cheerleader instead of my biggest enemy, and so the chance to get something right or to do something better has been my driving force in this season of my life.
Speaker 1:I think you're successful. We're always our own critic. We're always too hard on ourselves to me. In my eyes, when I look at you how you said like we're lights to you, we draw you, you draw me, you're a force to me.
Speaker 1:I see you running every day. I see you working out of people. I've worked out over here too, with you Like, yeah, I go to hot works, yeah, I go and work out. Yeah, we go to the gym, we'll go walk and we'll do this, I'll play volleyball, whatever it may be, but it's like you or so, okay, clockwork, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do this. And your ass is out here running and I'm like, oh hell, no, I'm gonna go eat a burger.
Speaker 2:You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean. Like you're very disciplined and something that even me and my cousin were just talking about the other day. He was like damn, don't have it out there running. He's like I haven't been to the gym in two weeks. He's like I'm about to get back on it. He's like I want to be like him and I was like me fucking too that motherfucker's out there running all the time. But see, those are things you don't even know that said you're back, that you wouldn't think yourself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, everyone's their own critic. I'm the prettiest girl ever and I have a too big of a nose. I have two bushy eyebrows. I don't have an ass. I don't got to like whatever. You never give yourself credit. I'm guilty of doing that to myself.
Speaker 1:There's times that I'm like I know I'm a very pretty person, I'm not ugly, but I mean I'm like oh you're. You know you're this or that. You're not skinny enough, you're not pretty enough, you're not this. But there's other times I'm like but you're hot. I look at pictures. I do this and I'm like wow, I look really good, but you're your own worst critic.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Your own, like you're not doing this, you're not doing this, but when I look at you, I never even know. You had things like that in your head. Like you said, you never know what someone's going through. So, treat him with kindness.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:And if you have a bad day, make it better. You're going to continue making it worse. You're going to do something better. You know and that's what I feel like when I look at you, like you're a light to people, you're an inspiration, to thank you so.
Speaker 3:I appreciate that so much.
Speaker 3:I have no idea. Yeah, it's very true, like you don't know what someone else is going through, and I think one of the Like that alone, I think, is a driving factor behind, like when I am like in a social setting or something. It's not necessarily easy, but I kind of gravitate to those people that are like kind of quiet off in the corner or maybe look like they're not sure if they should be there or not, because I want to do the same thing. I want to make people feel comfortable and welcome. So, you know, because I always felt like the person from the outside looking in, and I'm always trying to include people or find that, find ways in which we connect.
Speaker 3:We could be completely opposites when it comes to personalities or, on paper right, people that just don't fit together shouldn't be even be hanging out, shouldn't even be in the same place together, but I'm always looking for that one thing that Unifies us or that makes us have something at least one thing in common and I think that's that's something I pride myself on is that it's like well, we're gonna find the thing that we have in common, we're gonna find the thing, and that's something I always strive to do, and so that's something I would, I would love for people to understand about me. What would y'all say is something you want people to understand about you when they maybe first meet you or maybe, like you've had friends that you feel, maybe don't even understand that about you still.
Speaker 1:Mine's my resting bitch face. I'm not kidding people, I have heard it over and over and over. They're. They're like wow, tessa, it's really nice. You're really nice person.
Speaker 1:Like I thought you're always a bitch. I'm like what the fuck? I hear all the time and I really think that I don't do anything like to be bitchy to you. I could tell you, give me a reason. But if I don't have a reason, I'm gonna be really nice, like that's how I am treat people, how you want to be treated, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:I always have learned. I've always just taken that like I'm gonna treat you how I want to be treated, period. I'm not gonna treat you ugly. If I don't be treated ugly, but it's. Everybody always tells me that. So I think it's just like I Want you to understand that I'm not a bitch, it's just a fit, it's just my face. But that's something I want people to understand. But like how how you were saying you find someone in the corner and you go to that person making feel comfortable. That's me. I Always find the quiet person to be my, always find the one that looks kind of like an outcast in a way, like that does not feel comfortable being there, and you just bring them and you're like come on, let's come do this. You want to take a shot? I want to do this when I want to go bathroom. If it's a girl, we're gonna be like, you know, like yeah, so they feel included.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm really nice and when they meet me they're like you really are nice, you hung up all the popular kid. I'm like I don't care that. Popular kids, not kids, whatever. I was everyone's friend. It could be a gangster, it could be a Popular, you could be a nerd, you could do whatever. That's just what we, as humans, have categorized people as.
Speaker 1:I look at you. You're human, you're somebody, not a Nerd, not a jock, not a whatever. Like that's like some high school, like I'm gonna categorize you type shit, like I don't, it's just like you're, you're homie, yeah, that's it. You make him feel comfortable, but yeah, that's mine.
Speaker 2:I'm in love with Tesla right now.
Speaker 3:What do you hope people understand about you?
Speaker 2:Just know that I care kind of a generous person. I always take care of my friends whenever I can. Mm-hmm, I think that like catches people off guard when I first meet them is like, hey, let's go eat, let's go get a drink. I'm like, I got it, you can get the next one and I think that like freaks people out sometimes.
Speaker 3:No, I get that, that's I think that holds more weight than you might realize to just you know, for people to know that you care, that like, you're there because you care, you show up because you care.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I change my tire.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I change your tire.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm at a pet sitting house and I'm like I'm way, the fuck out west who lives out here, try to get a hot work. So I'm like Marty, I'm little, my tires fucking flat.
Speaker 2:Do you guys sign?
Speaker 1:I'm changing my fucker cranks it up, goes to change my tire. He does all the things that you do to change your tire. You know, tighten it back up. Tell me why. The jack, the car as he moves, the fucking jack just slips out of the car and the car just flops on the ground and we're both just like. I could have been here. I could have killed you.
Speaker 2:No, it was a sign. God was like you're gonna make your hot works appointment.
Speaker 1:He changed it for me, though, like he still picked me up, but he still changed my tire for me.
Speaker 2:I was also like on two scoops of pre-workout.
Speaker 1:So yeah, scratchin.
Speaker 2:I did it really fast, actually like no like speed fast.
Speaker 1:Talking about my car and then just put it back on. That's I'm saying. When that thing flew out of there, it was milliseconds. I was like damn, I would have a dead body and a flat tire.
Speaker 3:In. In the time that we've known each other, you you've just always been present. If you say you're gonna show up, you're gonna show up and I've always appreciated that. And like today you come in here like I guess, like Other times I've always like double checked with certain people would be like, is it, is this along we still good kind of thing. But like I just I knew you were gonna show up. Like you were texting me about like putting things on ice.
Speaker 2:I texted him, was like you got ice and he was like yeah, I can get some real quick. I was like I was like for drinks Nice.
Speaker 3:Tell me a story that Taught you one of the biggest lessons in life.
Speaker 2:I Feel like I should learn a lesson, all the trouble I get into, like At some point I should be paying attention, but I'm like well, we made it so, like on to the next adventure.
Speaker 3:That's not that's. We'll put that in the vault for later, and then worry about that later.
Speaker 1:Island. Everyone always tells you don't drink and drive, don't drink and drive and you'll go up like just say now, you know, with all the little, don't smoke, don't whatever.
Speaker 1:And then you get older and you're like, oh fuck that, I'm gonna try this right. Well, there was a time that I left a olfah party and I was like, I'll be fine, I'm gonna eat dinner. Well, I didn't eat lunch either and I had like 18 shots of a turn. Most time people go to the hospital for something, somehow. My psycho ass. I just took them all. I kept the shot glasses for Hell of it, like they're squishy.
Speaker 1:Anyways, I woke up in a field I had my car was sideways, I miss. I was missing two tires the front tire and the back tire was like hanging off. So there was no driving it. I broke my axle. I had no bumpers, like I was in a Chevy Malibu, mm-hmm, and I guess I was just flooring it, going like 100, whatever, went down 1788 till you can't go anymore hit a dirt road, turn, just kept going. Just, I'm talking about hydroplaning. I guess I do not know shouldn't have been behind the wheel and I hit this mound of dirt and like I don't know why my Airbags didn't deploy but like crushed my head, like my head crushed into the windshield. Yeah, I fucking passed out.
Speaker 1:I wake up. It's like four in the morning. It's 30, 23 degrees outside, literally 20. I checked my phone 23 degrees because I was frozen. I was in this like tank top with a leather jacket, thin as hell. Boots that had to open toad their open-toad booties, some spanks. Leggings like so hardly clothes. My head's bleeding it hurts, my hands Pretty much broken because I guess I punched the window before I knocked out or what. Maybe when I came to, I don't remember that's how drunk it was.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm but the next day, whenever I got picked up and or that morning I should say like hours later that morning I got picked up I just thought about it and there was just such a good lesson because after that it was like You've gotten lucky too many times drinking and driving, even if it's like just a buzz driving, a buzz driving, still a drunk driving. And I have so many nieces and nephews and friends, kids, that are my nieces and Family and just period anybody.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:I Would die if I killed someone's family member like I literally could not live with that for the rest of my life. I that I took the loved one that you love so dearly because I was stupid and I wanted a party and I want to drink and drive. No, after that. That was a wake-up call and I have never again drinking drove. But that was a really good life lesson. Once I woke up and I survived that I should have been not alive and the way I drove the car in, the way the car looked, and it's just like that's a lesson in itself. Don't don't think that you take it for granted. I could have spent the rest of my life in jail, mm-hmm which.
Speaker 1:I've never been. I don't know how, but for 29 years somehow I've not been, and so it's like I'm blessed, I'm grateful for that. But I could have taken someone you love. I could have taken someone you love, could take in someone I love and Then or if I killed myself, you know so it's just not worth it. That was one, I for sure, a big life lesson. Yeah that I took and I've never done it again because I know the way.
Speaker 1:I didn't even know when I woke up when I came to that, I was just clueless. So yeah, lesson learned don't drink and drive, because you could really fuck your life up. It's been your life in jail. Dwi is not worth it, killing somebody not worth it. We're taking. Killing yourself not worth it.
Speaker 3:I think there's like a point and I guess are growing up that we just feel like Invincible, yeah, and we feel like we can do anything and there's there's consequences don't exist right, and we can just do Whatever like is.
Speaker 1:I'll never get caught.
Speaker 3:We know about those things happening but then they don't happen to us kind of thing, you know. And just randomly, I'll remember a certain time when I was younger when I did something maybe that was a little bit risky, or said something that was out of out of pocket, you know, and it's like dang, I really said or did those things and it kind of makes you like, as you get older it kind of holds a little bit more Weight and you're like damn, I don't want to be that person that does that.
Speaker 1:He's gonna be better. Yeah, I need to want to feel better about yourself. When you easy to cast judgment, but make sure if you're gonna get a point of finger, you point that finger right back at yourself, cuz none of us are perfect, absolutely definitely. What about you, marty? Why are you sitting over there?
Speaker 2:Just I don't want to make this a podcast about cars, but like that's like you have a realization to like when you come close to like. There was one time I was like Holly nass, austin, with my friend and he's like, come on, go faster, go faster, go faster. And I'm like, yeah, we're going faster. One of our other friends was at a club waiting for us and he's like texting us. He's like where are you, where are you calling us? And I had a puddle going like Like 90 probably. You did a few turns like six total, like three, one way, three, another way, like hydroplane.
Speaker 2:Oh, there you just cuz I was like Going too fast and I'm like trying to be somewhere.
Speaker 3:And I know, no, no not worth it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I think that's the lesson is like, hey, slow down, like things are gonna be there when you want it right, it's not worth it.
Speaker 1:It's not worth taking a life, or? But I was listening to.
Speaker 2:Everyone else calling me and texting me. My friend in the car. He didn't have a seatbelt on either, so I like reached over and I like held him down, so we didn't like Die or he didn't fly out of the car or whatever there goes that, caring Marty he's.
Speaker 2:Like that's gonna save him. When I stopped or whatever, the car was like turned off, because apparently I turned it off. I don't remember turning that car off, like wrote down the window. There's people at like the next slide over and they're like like, oh, they're like that's the coolest thing we've ever seen.
Speaker 3:Charing me on that I did.
Speaker 2:That's a lesson for me, is like, sometimes I do things like 110%, hmm, like hey, slow down.
Speaker 3:I feel that 110%. No, yeah, I know like sometimes I'm just like go, go, go, go go and Like there's no time to stop, there's no time to worry about whatever, just get it done. And like once you get this one thing done, they get the next thing, then get the next thing done, and sometimes life will like get in the way, be like mm you thought.
Speaker 2:Sorry, dad, no one show this to my dad. Oh, Professional driver, he's the one that's always like hey, just get there.
Speaker 1:What about you? Don't even I want to hear.
Speaker 3:Oh great, I guess I wasn't prepared for the question to be turned around on me.
Speaker 1:I.
Speaker 3:Guess, like now, at this point in my life, I'm always trying to learn whatever lesson I can, because I feel like I'm always stressed out about like trying to be where I'm meant to be. I worry about so many things working out for my in my favorite in life, like I want this to work out to the best possible Outcome that it can, and so I'm always worried about like well, if that's gonna happen, I need to learn this lesson, and so I'm always looking for the next lesson to learn, always looking for the next lesson to learn, and maybe that's a bad thing, like always looking for something to learn, but I feel like I learn lessons every day. Shit, I think about the times that I would. I would do an underage drinking or drinking while driving when I was underage and being with people that I shouldn't be with and things like that. But I guess that's the extent of it. To be honest, it's kind of like playing it safe.
Speaker 1:That's crazy. What about you might watch a craziest?
Speaker 2:I don't know. I think I play it pretty safe. There's not anything.
Speaker 1:I think that I have problems, no you know what it? Is like I think I might have problems because I've done a lot of crazy shit.
Speaker 3:No, you know what it is. I think I always have played it a little safe in life, because you know my brother, he's very fearless and he was, you know, the guy that wasn't afraid to do what he wanted and had fun and Older. Yes, okay, older brother, yeah, and I love him to death, and has always been. You know like it takes a certain amount of confidence to just say like I don't care what anybody says, I'm gonna do what I want to do.
Speaker 1:Absolutely yeah.
Speaker 3:And I've always admired him for that. But the times that there were consequences for him to pay, like, I was kind of on the sidelines watching him pay for those consequences, right. And so me growing up I was like, well, I don't want to, I don't want to face those consequences. So I'm going to kind of play it a little more safer when it comes to this, and so I don't know if I wouldn't, I don't necessarily feel like that kept me from doing anything that I wanted to do, right, but maybe that's why I played it a little safe and don't have the craziest stories to tell.
Speaker 1:Have to make better decisions.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I guess. So I mean, I know, I feel like sometimes I could be a little bit more carefree, like I could benefit from being a little bit more carefree, but yeah, that's, I think that's why.
Speaker 1:Not me. I'm the oldest, Okay.
Speaker 1:He was like I'm always at a why we got 13 of us now, not kid, not, I have a little brother and two little sisters, and then everybody else is like cousins and stuff, but I'm and my niece or whatever, but there's like 13 or 14 of us like kids and I'm the oldest. So it's like everything. It's my trial and error. They watched me.
Speaker 1:I was the one that, like you said, carefree, confident, rebellious, whatever, like I just, I just wanted to just do it, like you know, like I'm going to, I'm going to go, didn't have to think out, walked out the front door like bye, grammy. Walked out, like but I'll tell her like this is where I'm at, this is who I'm with, these are the drugs that are going to be there, these are drugs I'm not doing, I am going to be underage drinking, but this is it. And she just stared at me and she was like Test marina, like I'm just telling you in case I die or end up, you know, headless on our doorstep or something. You know, these are the people you need to go talking to, because these are the last people I was supposed to be with. And at least that's like respect for her, because she was like okay, but I've got myself into some sticky, crazy situations that I'm very not proud of on some occasions.
Speaker 3:What's some advice you give but don't always follow.
Speaker 2:What do you laugh? Because I usually tell people hey, pace yourself, I don't follow my own advice. Usually they're giving me advice and I'm not listening, is what it is so like. Yeah, I run headfirst into everything. My friend Joey he always quotes to me. There's a 1975 song called she's American and there's a part where he says don't fall in love with the moment.
Speaker 3:You think?
Speaker 2:you're in love with the girl. Yes, that like second half is like for another podcast, but like the don't fall in love with the moment is like I do everything really fast. Yeah, that's, that's my problem Headfirst no thoughts.
Speaker 3:I can understand how you're looking at that bit of advice, but I can also see, like some, some light in it, because I feel like falling in love with the moment is like where you learn some of the best lessons in life. Is like if you just lean into life, like whatever's happening, regardless of whatever tomorrow brings, just lean into now Right, and you'll, you'll find your footing. Like you'll, you'll get back on your feet in no time. Where I mean, even if, like the now knocks you off your feet, you'll be back on your feet in no time. And so I think there's beauty in that, because I love that quote too. I remember when that album came out, I was listening to it nonstop and we were on a work trip and that was one of the lyrics that stood out to me, and so he's like hit me with that a few times.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's probably. It's not even from him. What about you, Tessa?
Speaker 1:I think a lot of the advice that I give it like I have a lot of relationship advice to give because a lot of my friends are in relationships and my longest was 10 years, pretty much.
Speaker 1:We dated for like six, but really like 10, because, no matter what it was like, we broke up. But it was always us. Everyone knew don't, don't fuck with them, it's them, it's them. And so I'm always here to tell you like, oh, you know, I'm gonna give you this advice about this guy. Or don't do this, don't do that, or you know, he's going to be like that with a new need to go better yourself. You can do this, you need to do that. I'm the wrong one to even be telling you. I went through it. Yeah, I'm giving you good advice to not do it, but what do I do? Fall and do the exact opposite what I tell you to do. Oh, he's going to be addicted to you. He's going to do this. Well, you need to go do this with the girls. I don't answer his phone calls if he's going to.
Speaker 1:You know, or you know, I just try to give advice and then I give the wrong advice because it's, how can you give advice when you don't fall at yourself or you fall back into that? Or confidence advice I'm always telling people like beauty comes within, be confident. How can I sit and preach to you about owning your beauty, loving yourself, loving your body, loving you whenever I don't even love myself. Sometimes there's times that I'm like you were dropped a gorgeous. You're a tin, like if I was a man you would be my idol woman. And then there's other times it's you're not a toothpick Like society, skinny, that's it.
Speaker 1:That's you're only pretty for skinny. Why? How am I going to preach that to you? Because when I think about it on my own head, I'm like I don't have abs, I don't have a flat tummy, you know, like I have this, I have that. I sit here and I tell everyone, like don't think about that, that's just what society wants you to believe. Like you're beautiful in yourself when you can't even take it yourself, like it goes back to being your own critic, to your worst own critic. You can sit and pin poke all these things and it's not ever true. It's just what's in your head, that's what people think, it's what you think. People think because society makes you think that and I think that that's the one thing that I is your body weight or your beauty or whatever. Very, very, very easy telling you to be confident, when it's very hard sometimes for me to be confident, even though it looks like it like I am at points in time. Sometimes it's not that way. It's very easily hidden.
Speaker 3:That's very admirable for you to say, because I feel like you exude nothing but confidence and I believe that there's good intention and honest intention whenever you're giving this advice to somebody. But I mean, I totally get that. I mean, obviously we're our worst own critics. We've made that clear, I'm sure, like I've said that a hundred times, like I'm my sometimes I'm my own worst enemy. I just say that to say don't discredit your advice, because I know it comes from a pure heart and whether the advice we give is something we follow or not, I think it still comes from a pure place.
Speaker 1:Definitely agree.
Speaker 3:I resonate with both of y'all's points very much, because I feel like, as somebody who's trying to live more in the moment, this is what I'm supposed to do, like I'm supposed to throw myself into this.
Speaker 3:And you know, sometimes I get caught up easily and then there's some kind of residual debris that I have to sort through in the coming days. But I mean it shapes you into who you are and then also, to the extent that you were talking about relationship advice, like you give it, but you it's very, I guess, in a sense, easy to fall into those same behaviors or habits when it comes to love, and I 100% resonate with that as well. I think at this point in my life I'm trying to do things on the opposite or do the opposite behavior that I've always done. I've always been quick to fall in love, I've always been quick to give my all to somebody and forget about my needs and things like that, and so I'm trying to do the exact opposite, intentionally, and I wonder if it's leading me in the right direction. So I guess we'll find out. But that's the beauty in life. I guess we'll find out.
Speaker 1:Yep, take a step towards something We'll find out. We'll find out.
Speaker 3:We'll find out real quick.
Speaker 1:Whatever that is, it's dangerous. He calls it a pink out.
Speaker 3:Yeah, pink out.
Speaker 1:Everybody. We're T, we're trademarking. It's a Marty, it's a Marty special. Marty special is called a pink out. You want to know what a Marty special is? You got to fucking meet Marty. I need a bar.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, let's open a bar. I want to.
Speaker 1:Oh, I'll be the mouth. I got girls that have good titties and I'll just be like this and we'll just ride on them, because I'll just attract all the men. And then y'all got to go out there and y'all got to shake your asses. We're about to have a badass bar, oh yeah.
Speaker 3:I want a bar, or I would love to open a bar, but I want it to be a coffee house during the day and then transition into a bar. But you know, like there's those restaurants that like move tables and you're like now it's time for the bar or the club and it's like that don't feel right, like you've taken away the restaurant experience and you're like people are in the middle of having their dinner and they're trying to move tables and turn it into a club and it's like this. Don't feel right.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I've been to those.
Speaker 3:I was in Austin a couple of months ago and it was like this really fancy Mexican restaurant that like people talk so highly about, and we were in the middle of our dinner and like the lights go dim and it's like I can't even see what I'm eating and then people are moving tables out because it's a salsa club afterwards, I think I know what you're going to talk about.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's like okay, I have been there.
Speaker 3:It's like this cool, but I guess it's two separate experiences. But what is one thing most people assume about you? But it's not true.
Speaker 2:I think people think that I'm just like scientists all day. That's not the case. I love that you're a scientist. I'll point out like facts that I have like floating around in my head, but like I'm not like doing science all day. I think people get scared of that. Sometimes they're like just think like walking around as a mad scientist in his lab coat, cover your mouth yeah, I'm just living the lab coat all day. Make a potion Drinks yeah, no, just normal person, not a scientist all day, not doing math and stats and formulations all day.
Speaker 1:But quit your smart thing again, yeah it is cool that I can. Because it got me fucked up.
Speaker 2:I was like what can.
Speaker 1:I graduate college with no more math communications. I'm on it.
Speaker 2:We'll take that degree. You do be communicating.
Speaker 1:You do be communicating, yeah, I use it every day and never shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3:Do you feel like our equations going on in your head all the time?
Speaker 2:No, I'll just like spit out random facts and then they're like who asked?
Speaker 3:I'm like, okay, sorry, I'd be like intentionally asking for random things.
Speaker 2:Give us a random fact right now. Sometimes they'll be like why is this? I'm like I don't know. They're like why don't you know? That's also a problem. Is like if I don't know, I just don't know.
Speaker 1:I think it's cool that you know random facts. Yeah, yeah, you look at a tree it's trees 18 years old because the rings on it. Like I learned that because my uncle on the river one day. He's like that's an old tree, you know how it's all the rings inside its trunk and I'm like that's fucking. I didn't know Guess what. I was like 13. I learned that fact and here we are, all these years later and I still remember that. Hell yeah, that's good enough. You've probably taught a lot of people more than you think.
Speaker 2:Probably. Let's see if they listen.
Speaker 1:A lot of people think I'm rich and I laugh.
Speaker 1:You girls just hold yourself well or like I would go back to the thing I'm a fucking bitch because of my face and I'm like okay. But then they meet me and they think I'm really nice and I'm like I am. I try to be nice like them. Or whenever they tell me someone was like, I always thought you were rich. You know, I thought the rich kids are like yeah, they had money. You want to know why I went on cool stuff. Their parents I said oh, we're going where.
Speaker 1:Y'all are going to do something. I'm going where, say I'm on my way, I do what I want. You're going to say no, I'm still doing it. I think that's on my family. Growing up they were just like don't do this, don't do this, don't be this, and they just gave up because, no matter what, I've always done what I want. But you, you learn that way. Like you learn a good lesson, like you're always trying to be a you know, a head ass and you're always trying to like go and do all these things. And that's how you learn. Someone's always going to tell you don't do this, but you can always tell me don't do it, but that makes me want to do it more. Then I'm going to go do that. And then it's like oh, now I know why you said don't do this, but I mean, it's that's why you just live and you learn do what you can and whatever they think about you, that's what they're going to think about you.
Speaker 3:You live and you learn.
Speaker 1:You live and you get judged. Either way, it could be perfect, get judged. It could be be shit. Get judged. I get judged every day and I'm like I do not care what you're just saying. You might think I'm a crazy loud alcoholic because I drink every weekend. Well, you don't know any. You don't have my story, you know. So let them judge. That's why I always say let them judge. Even if you're perfect, everyone will always pick something out to have negative to say about you Because they don't want to see the positive. But it's like you can say whatever you want. But I think that's a gift for us. It's because you just I get out the window to you, I punch you in your arm.
Speaker 3:I do all these things. You know like we just you, just you. Yeah, just do you. People are going to judge regardless. Yeah, yeah, just tell them you can suck my ass.
Speaker 1:I'm still going to do that. Suck my ass and then just keep going and guess what? Damn nothing to fucking say and they'll remember that for the rest of your life. I was trying to be a bitch to her and she told me suck her ass, I'll bend over, sweetheart.
Speaker 3:That was perfect. I think we're good. Yeah, how about? Fine, any less closing words, any less thoughts, if you?
Speaker 2:ain't first or last. I can't think of anything. I like that though.
Speaker 1:I think in the main, the whole let's just wrap this up is be real and treat people with kindness and how you want to be treated and just live your life to the best abilities, learn from your mistakes and just keep moving forward so you can do childless to judge yourself. It's always good to at least just have some positivity because you live your life. What I guess, what you speak out, is what you manifest in yourself. I guess you could say so if you're going to say I'm this, you know it could be so other yourself and you could say like, oh, I'm this, this, this, and you could be really mean. Or you could say I'm proud of the accomplishments made. I am a very good person I am. This is more positive you speak, the more positive your life is going to be. You speak the words that come into existence. So I think that's what we should just leave off is leave the existence with positive vibes, Good vibes, good vibes.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Good vibes, we'll talk.
Speaker 3:Celebrate yourself.
Speaker 1:That's a t-shirt. There you go.