Parshas Mikeitz: Why You Can't Succeed Until You Let Go (The Menasheh Prerequisite)

What if growth isn't about grinding harder, but carrying less? In this episode, we explore Joseph's surprising blueprint for success: first, name your pain to release its hold, then build from a place of freedom. By examining why Menashe ("God made me forget") precedes Ephraim ("God made me fruitful"), we uncover a timeless principle that turns spiritual insight into daily strategy.

We bridge this ancient narrative with lived experience. The Sforno interprets "forgetting" as the ultimate release from past troubles—a capacity we all possess but seldom use. Rambam takes this further, describing repentance (teshuvah) as the act of becoming "a different person," breaking the cycle that keeps us tethered to yesterday's failures. We'll apply this to real-world scenarios: the difficult client you still resent, the project that imploded, the habit you can't seem to break. The aim isn't amnesia; it's the disciplined choice to stop letting the past dictate your next move.

You will leave with a clear, actionable approach: hold onto your principles, but drop the baggage. Cultivate a short memory where it serves you, like an athlete who takes the eleventh shot with the same confidence as the first, despite missing the previous ten. Crowd out rumination with forward-pulling goals and redirect your focus to where it truly belongs—the work that bears fruit. Detachment precedes growth, not because the pain wasn't real, but because your future cannot flourish while the past occupies center stage.

Ready to travel lighter and build stronger? Listen now, subscribe for more practical Torah wisdom, and share with us: What are you choosing to set down today?

Transcript

Forgetting As The First Step

SPEAKER_01 0:00

The difference between your success on this planet or your failure, God forbid, will come down to if you can forget your dark times and your failures. The following talk, its goal is to impress upon your mind to deepen the powerful idea that forgetting the darkness of the past and your failures, letting go of trauma, of insults, it is often the prerequisite for your future success. Uli Yosef Yolad Shne Vonim. We begin the weekly Harsha podcast. Perak Mem Aleph Hosuk Nun. Kind of a change of pace, Posuk. Yosef, we are clued into his life, and we're told the names of his children.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

The Pasuk says after Yosef married Osnas, Uli Yosef Yulad Shne Vonim Biterim Tavo Shinas Haroa Vasher Yoldalo Osnas Bas Poiti Perak Kohan Own.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

Before the years of the famine came, you know the story, Yosef predicting the famine in Egypt. Before all that happened, the Torah interjects and tells us the names of Yosef's children.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

Yosef became a father of two sons, whom Osnas, the daughter of Koti Ferah, the priest of Own, bore to him. What were the names of thy children? Eskol Amoli, the Skol Base Avi, The Sham Hashani, Karra Ephraim, Kiefrani Elohim, Better On E. Yosef named the firstborn. Minasha.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

A beautiful name. Meaning, why did he call him Minasha? Because Minasha means God has made me forget, completely forget, my hardship in my parental home. Noshani is what Yosef borrowed the root of the word from to create Minashe, that God made me forget. That was the name of his first son. His second son.

SPEAKER_00 2:51

The Ashem Hashani, Kara Ephraim, Ki Ephrani Elohimba Eretani. The second he named Ephraim, which means God has made me fertile, fertile, plentiful, fruitful in the land of my affliction.

Order Of Names And Its Message

SPEAKER_01 3:10

Note here, not just the names of Yosef's sons, but the order in which he gave them their names. Yosef, the man who is the Ishmatzliach, the man who is called the successful one, has been through well, suffering. Well, shall we say pain, since suffering is a choice, pain that few individuals on this earth will endure. Thrown to pits, sold as slaves, a slave, alone, homeless, tempted, up against wild animals, just a little boy he was.

SPEAKER_00 4:05

After he had grown up in the lap of luxury and become well acquainted with the finer things in life. But no, Yosef lived a life of struggle, but yet he was successful.

Sforno On Forgetting Past Troubles

SPEAKER_01 4:18

And when he reaches his acme, at the very briss of his first son, after he found a Moel somewhere in Mitraim, maybe it was he who did the Mila himself on his son, he named his kid Minasha. That God made me forget. Not to be lost is the great message here. That it's critical for us to see. That the man tells us that his success started with forgetting his pain. And the man who tells us that he forgot his pain names his second son. Fruitful, creative, plentiful. Is it not obvious to us that the name of his sons here very much connect with how Yosef was Matzliach? The Svarno. You don't have to guess or imagine. The Svarno, Ribb of Aja Misvarno, the Italian Rishon. What does it mean, Kinoshani Elohim, that God made me forget? What is Yosef attributing this name to? He's connecting it to the ultimate removal of past troubles.

SPEAKER_00 5:53

The Svarno tells us the lesson behind the name Minasha. Kinoshani Elohim, says the Swarno.

SPEAKER_01 6:01

This name is the same type of name, an idea that we will experience in the future when Mashiach comes.

SPEAKER_00 6:17

The future era, just as Yeshayahu tells us, that the former trouble shall be forgotten. The Sephardno draws upon the idea of the Mashiach coming and saving us, that we will forget, says Yeshayhu, our previous pain.

Applying Forgetfulness To Success

Short Memory And Confidence

Rambam On Becoming A New Person

SPEAKER_01 6:35

That is what Yosef was connoting and denoting, inspiring and preaching when he named his kid Vyakari Shimobi Israel Menasha, that I forgot what my brothers did to me. That I forgot and I hid it from my eyes, the former troubles. The idea here, ladies and gentlemen, is that while much of the world is latched, leashed down to the ground because of so many failures and so many missteps. It has failed so many times before. So they go into their future endeavors with rust. They don't go in fresh. They go in remembering deeply how many times they failed and how unsuccessful they have been, but not Yosef. Yosef and the name of his son teach us that to be Matsliach, step one to success is to draw upon the beautiful God-given attribute that you possess called forgetfulness. To let go to release and move on. Too many people can't do business with certain people because of how they've been treated by them. It does hurt when you've been wronged. But if you continue to keep score, there becomes increasingly a smaller pool of professionals to do business with. Forget that when you did your first deal, or your first prospective farming of a house listing in Lakewood, forget that it was with the most evil individual you've ever met. Forget that he wanted to report you to the real estate board. Forget. Move on. From the man who just wants to drain your energy and probably has his own struggles. Forget it. Because it's a good house and you can sell the house. Forgetting menach-ing setbacks and weird situations is the key to success. It helps you to start fresh. God gave us this ability. To forget things is to be able to move on and to start a new beginning. You don't have to be weighed down by your past. But too many people can't call their firstborn Manasha. And they never end up becoming the Ishmazliach. Too many people say for 20 years I've been doing this sin and they can't start new. Too many of us say I've tried learning Torah and I've given a real commitment to it, and it's failed 50 times in a row. Too many people, including myself, have taken three-point jump shots, 10 of them straight in a game, and missed all of them. And had their coach tell them, Mike, if you were standing on a boat right now, your basketball game is so poor that you couldn't throw a rock in the ocean. But when there's 10 seconds left, how do you have the confidence to take the last shot? You forget that you missed 10. You move on and you have a short memory. Some self-understood short-term memory loss. You draw on Minasha and you forget and you move on with it's just me and the next shot. Rambam tells us that the Darke Hachuva, a famous Rambam, a world famous Rambam. Mishna Torah Hilchas Chuva Perik Bez Halacha Dalid. It is from the ways of Chuva. For the repenter, the penitent, to cry out constantly in front of Hashem, to have some pain in his heart about his misdeeds. The Ramak continues. As you start to change, you start to become a new person. You should quite literally change your name. Go down to the courthouse. I used to be Johnny. Now I want to be called Jim. Kilomar.

SPEAKER_00 12:28

Not literally. The Rambam here is explaining his point what he means to change the name. Ani Akher, I'm a different person.

What Joseph Did And Did Not Forget

SPEAKER_01 12:37

Not that I'm Akher, the person who went off the Derach, the famous sage who went awry. But Ani Akher, I am a different individual. I'm not the same person. The Aini Oso Ha-ish. Shaasa Osan Hamasim, I'm not that person. He embraces a new reality. He names his son Minasha. He draws upon the fact that God made me forget. I'm effectively declaring that was the old me. I'm not a victim. I'm not the slave, the hated brother, and the boy who was thrown into the pit. That was my past. That I am no longer pained by the sting of it. Because I've chosen to change my name and forget my past. I am forgetting my pain, and I am not choosing to suffer. I'm forgetting that just last minute. I failed. Because now is a new minute. The great of Shamshin Refoil Hirsch. He explains the same idea on this Pussik with a little bit of a different twang. He points out grammatically that this is all hinted in the word. Yosef's not saying that I'm forgetting the values of his father. I'm just forgetting and wiping my slate clean. Hardly. Yosef doesn't go off the derek and go off the rails in Egypt.

SPEAKER_00 14:17

You wouldn't find Yosef in any of the clubs, bars, or theaters of Egypt. You would find him in his room studying Torah. So what did Yosef forget? Not the morals and values of this holy Torah that he inherited from his father. No.

SPEAKER_01 14:35

He forgot his longing and mourning that would have crippled him in his Hatzlacha.

SPEAKER_00 14:42

Had he ever spent his time pining for his home and obsessing over the pain of how he was wronged by his brothers, wrongly accused, he was just an innocent chap, it would have been useless to the Torah's narrative in Hashem's rotson.

Choosing Focus On Future Growth

Detachment Before Fruitfulness

SPEAKER_01 15:05

He had to forget. He had to forget the pain of the separation and the pain of the torture. The homelessness, the sleeplessness, in order to become the Ishmaat's liyach that he became. Step one to Hatzlacha is to forget. You can do it. You can forget. You can move on. You do not need to dwell. It's liberating when you choose to forget. It's a skill that you can cultivate. You don't need to erase your memory to forget. You don't need to imagine that it never happened. You failed in a certain sin hundreds of times for many years. You can't just wish it away, but you can choose to move on from the emotional sting and not allow it to control you. You can choose to crowd it out because you're choosing to focus and shift your attention to the future. You can choose, you can choose to replace old ruminations of sin with fresh, new active goals. Just as Yosef did. You can choose to focus on Ephraim, building new, focusing on what you can accomplish, and not trying to pick up all of the apples that spilled from the cart in the previous day's work. You're not a victim. Whatever happened was supposed to happen. Whatever nisionas you were given, you were supposed to be given. Whatever vivid trauma you can remember, whether it was with your battle with the Eitzahara, traumas in your youth, struggles in the office, fights in the home, suffering. You can choose to move on from it. You can. The Torah psychology here, on full, beautiful, fabulous display. The order of operations of Hatzlacha delivered here in the subtle message of the names of Yosef's children. Detachment precedes growth. Forgetting the pain and naming your boy Menasha. It's the only way that you could ever name another son Ephraim. We too in conclusion cannot build a successful future. We cannot become an Ishmaat's Liach. Unless we move on and unlearn the failures. We focus on the future. And we forget the traumas, the mistakes, and the tough times. The more that we dwell is the more that we are weakened. God willing. The straightening of the vertebrae and a forgetting of the failures. That to be fruitful and multiply and to be the most ultimately successful man, it begins with a detachment from the pain. The Hatzlacha begins as preceded by a letting go. Of the failure and the pains of your past.