Proverbs 16:32 (Biblical Intelligence): Episode 380

Anger feels powerful until it starts costing you your peace. I’m digging into Proverbs 16:32, a sharp, practical verse that redefines strength: patience and self-control can be greater than winning the loudest battle. If you’ve been pushing through workplace toxicity, feeling sabotaged on the job, or trying to “stick it out” in a relationship that leaves you drained, this message is for you.

We talk honestly about the trap of believing God is tied to a specific place or person. God isn’t “in the job” or “in the relationship,” God is in you, and God goes with you. That shift changes everything, including how you set boundaries, when you stop fighting battles that beat you down, and how you decide whether it’s time to stay or time to leave. I also share a moment at a bus terminal where staying calm in the face of disrespect became an unexpected lesson in biblical emotional regulation.

From there, we go deeper into accountability and healing patterns. We explore how internalized thoughts can create false realities, how repeating the same situations often signals unmade changes, and why trust matters when you don’t have every answer. If you want Christian encouragement, practical self-control, and a faith-based mindset for breaking cycles, press play. If it helps you, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find healing.

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Have a lovely day and stay blessed

Transcript

Patient Over Warrior

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back, listeners. I'm Robin Black, and this is It's All About Healing Podcast. In today's episode, Biblical Intelligence, Proverbs 1632. Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city. And this scripture stood out to me because I know a lot of my life, I believe, was based around this scripture because I have been through so many things, especially in work, like workplace toxicity and in certain relationships. But I know with these jobs, it was like I would get these jobs where people would try to sabotage you and try to get you fired because you were the one who was actually trying to do your job, right? And and just trying to take it on all by myself, which is, you know, I would document and do things which you definitely should document if you're having any type of issue at work. But it was the fact that I tried to stay there, right? Or if it were a relationship that I tried and oh God, well, I know that you're here. You brought me here, right? You you brought me to this job or you brought me to this relationship. Let me try to stick it out. Let me, but if if we're miserable, right, we're not rooted like a tree, right? We can be rooted in God, right? Because then that way we can't be uprooted. But you're not rooted like a tree in places, right? Or with people. God moves with us. We don't have to try to fight these battles and be the wounded warrior and keep trying to fight and fight and fight and fight and think that that's what God wants us to do. No, God doesn't. If we are that miserable, God wants you to get up and leave. As long as your situation is in order and you actually have the ability and all the necessities to leave, then that's what He wants you to do because God goes with you. God isn't based in this work environment or this, God, you brought me to this job, so I'm trying to stick it out and just do it here. God says, no, I don't need you. I'm not in this job. I'm in you. I'm not in that relationship. I'm in you. We don't have to stay. We don't have to try to fight these battles that just completely beat us down. And what is so funny is I I remember when I worked with someone, and there was this, he and I were standing at one of the bus terminals, and you know, one of the drivers, or it was either a driver or a passenger, I don't even remember, but she came up and she had a horrible attitude with me, right? She was cussing and everything, and I just stood there. I just I let her go have at it, and I told her, you know, whatever it was that she needed help with, and I just let her go on her way. You know, she rolled her eyes and walked off and whatever. And he was upset with me. And he was like, Why are you acting like a punk? And I was like, What? What do you mean? And he was like, So you just gonna sit there and let her talk to you like that, and blah, blah, blah. And I was like, no, I said it just doesn't bother me. And he was like, How does that not bother you? Like, he was very upset, and I didn't understand why he was so upset. So, me, I just walked off and went on and kept kept working. And then I believe it was maybe like three or four days later, he came to me again and he was like, You know what? He said, I want to thank you. And I said, Thank me for what? And he said, That really, really bothered me that you didn't say anything to that woman. And I was like, You're still on that? Like, that was forever ago. And he was like, You don't understand. He said that that bothered me like deeply that you didn't do anything. He said, Because it made me look at you a little differently. He said, But now I see. He was like, You just kind of take the high row, you don't let it bother you. He said, Because as much as it's bothering me, I feel like it's probably bothering that girl as well, because it's like you kill them with kindness. And I said, It's not just killing them with kindness. I said, it's just when you get to a certain point, you just kind of become numb to it. You you're able to tune out people's frustrations because you know it has nothing to do with you. And the only reason I got to that point is because of God, who I am, how I'm rooted in God. Because I understand that this isn't my battle. It's not my battle at all. Other people being upset, I can't take that on personally, and neither should you. And he was like, I know, because it bothered me. And the crazy thing is that I took from that is how God uses us, how his divine placement and how he brings you back to instant replays to show you when I showed up in your life for someone else. God uses us as his vessel so many times. And sometimes just the God in you, God, people are able to see who God is through you. That's why he uses us even in times when we don't even realize that God is using us as that vessel, he is. And that gentleman really needed to see that, and he saw the work of God through me. And it was it was beautiful. It was like something so simple. It was like, thank you, Jesus. Thank you for allowing to allow me to feel you use me to have him see who you are, and let him actually comprehend why silence spoke volumes, because you don't have to be so quick to anger, and that's what Proverbs 1632 is about being slow to anger, and so does James 119, I believe that's a that's another scripture. I think it's uh everyone must be quick to listen, but slow to speak and slow to anger. And once you master the discipline of self, that's when you gain that self-control. Your step, your self-esteem rises. Everything about you is calm. God brings that calmness where things just don't really bother you anymore. You're just like, eh, oh well, you know, it is what it is, but you're not saying it is what it is. It's just you're saying because you're more so trusting. That doesn't bother me anymore because that that validation, I don't need that. I am who I am. They are who they are. If they're being bothered by little things, let them be bothered by little things. It has absolutely nothing to do with me. So when we stop trying to take over the city and try to take over the world and be mad, and I'm gonna get back at all these people who did me wrong, and I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna do that. You realize that you're exhausted, you're tired because you're trying to be that warrior, you're trying to do it all on your own when the one inside of you is already one. But it's there's there's a sometimes there's a lot of accountability that I believe some of us are all guilty of. And that's us taking our own part in some of the things that we do, some of the suffering. We prolong some of our own suffering simply by thinking incorrectly, right? Simply by living in our heads, right? When we internalize all of these thoughts, we don't realize that we're creating false realities when we do that. So then now we believe our own assumptions, right? We believe our own conclusions that we come to. And it's just, it's like this does not make sense, right? Now you're confused, now you're this, now you're saying, oh, the devil is alive, or not today, Satan. And it's like, or you could take the accountability and realize that once you heed to the darkness, the darkness can come in. But also, it's like God has the enemy on a leash as well. You have to know God's part. God allows some of these things so that we can learn these lessons, so that we can see the diamonds that we really are. Because that's we we get stuck in these jobs or these relationships, and then we get stuck on autopilot. And it's like we just walk around and people are saying, Oh, I'm just surviving, you know. No, you're not. You have to actually live. Live your life because that's what God wants us to do. He wants us to live happily. So many are just, they don't dream anymore. A lot of us aren't dreaming anymore. We just say, Well, this is this is just life. This is what it has become, but it's not. There's so many more things that we can do. And we say, Well, how am I supposed to get through this if I can't find the answer? Or if I don't understand. Well, that's when God says that's that's the whole point, that's the whole issue. Is you're searching for something that you will never find. You have to stop searching for the answer and trust that it's already been answered. When our prayers go up, God has already answered that prayer, right? But when that prayer goes up, he gives us an opportunity. And with that opportunity, he gives us a chance, a chance to make a choice on what we want to do. A lot of people say, Well, I keep finding the same job, I keep getting the same person, I keep meeting the same people just with a different face, and nothing is changing. But history, it's not supposed to keep repeating itself. It keeps repeating itself because you're not implementing the change. So therefore, that lesson keeps coming through over and over and over and over again. And then you feel you adapt to it and you're thinking, okay, well, maybe I'm just supposed to be this warrior. I'm supposed to just keep fighting it and fighting it and fighting it. But no. But at the same time, God may also be concealing your answer through it. Even though you keep meeting the same person, you keep repeating the same thing, still understand that it's your conditioning. That day will come where you say enough is enough, and I really, really mean it this time. And when that day comes, that's when you stop searching for understanding. Right? You stop trying to be understood and you focus on, God, I want to understand you. I don't want to have to know every single answer. I don't want to have to just, God, I gotta understand why you're doing this. I gotta understand this. God says, no, you have to just learn and grow in wisdom and learn to trust me without knowing the answer, without having an understanding, because know that it will come. I don't know when, I don't know the day, I don't know the hour, I have no idea. But know and trust that that day will come.