Two Assholes and a Mic
Two Assholes and a Mic
S2E16 - LEGO Hustles, Mortgage Math, and the 72-Ounce Challenge
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In S2E16, we get into Robby selling off some of his LEGO collection, Ian’s house purchase and plans to hammer down the mortgage, and whether a five-pound steak challenge is actually doable. Along the way, Kai drops into the conversation, we talk family life, hard water, housework, legal weed, Ian’s productive day at work, Robby’s never-ending Mustang repairs, and one fly that refuses to leave him the hell alone.
What's up everybody? It's Ian.
SPEAKER_03And this is Robbie, and we're two assholes in a mic.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I can hear him. Tweet tweet.
SPEAKER_03Did you hear that one?
SPEAKER_02Tweet tweet. It sounded like a one of those Irish Irish Scottish birds.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Fucking they're rare and elusive. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02Oh shit.
SPEAKER_03What?
SPEAKER_02Dropped my brick. Oh.
SPEAKER_03I got a pack. Oof, I got a pack. What am I doing with my life?
SPEAKER_02What are you doing?
SPEAKER_03Packing. Yeah. Did a show earlier today.
SPEAKER_01Did you?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I sold some personal collection figs because uh this girl that I've been selling to a bunch lately. She has all except for like five figs from series one to series 29. So I was like, dude, I have to give her the figs that I have because I'm not even gonna come close to completing it. Yeah. So I sold her off a couple of the figs that I have. Um I was looking for two more. I'm looking for two more that I had that I thought I had that I can't find right now to sell to her, too. But yeah, so the one of them was the Viking CMF goes for $40 something dollars. I sold it to her for $25 because I was just like, dude, I cannot sell this thing to for $47.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Damn.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I could have to somebody else, but what series was that one from? That one was from series 19, the Viking? I think it's series 19. 14? No, 14 is all the series 14 is all like the monsters and stuff.
SPEAKER_02What uh what series are they up to now?
SPEAKER_0329. They just uh they just released 29. I just completed series 29 yesterday. I have all series 29.
SPEAKER_02Would you you think you would ever go back and finish collecting all the the figs from each season or no?
SPEAKER_03Nah, they're too expensive. Like like I said, the Viking that I just sold is $40 something dollars. I just sold him for 25. I won't find him for 25. You know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_02If someone was to find one for cheap, though, then would you would you do it? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah, the series CMF Viking is expensive because he comes with a one-of-a-kind shield, one of a kind spear, and he's dual molded legs with dual with leg printing, and he's got awesome prints that he's never they've never put on anybody else before either. So he's just all around an awesome dude. But I have I have the Viking Village, and it comes with Vikings in it. So I was just like, this Viking isn't gonna help me with my city building. It's not going to it it doesn't bring anything to the table for me as far as the city. So I figured somebody else has got some badass like display with all the series. Like, she's gonna send me a picture whenever she gets home. She's got a doctor's appointment.
SPEAKER_02That'd be fucking cool.
SPEAKER_03Hell yeah. So I'm gonna she's gonna send me a picture of all the shelves.
SPEAKER_02Apparently she's ask her if she's cool with it. Send me the picture. I'll post it on the the page.
SPEAKER_03I'll send it to you if she sends it to me.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, so if she's cool with it, then I'll we'll post it up on there.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I'll ask her. Yeah, dude. It look it yeah, I'm sure it's gonna look awesome. I'm excited to see it. She may have already sent it to me. I don't know if she's because I don't get notifications for whatnot messenger. Yeah. You know, you just have to get on and see if you've got messages or not. Yeah. Let me check.
SPEAKER_02Is that standard or is that just the way you have your notifications set up?
SPEAKER_03Uh it may be the way I have it set up. I'm not sure. I had it to where they couldn't message me before.
SPEAKER_02Oh really?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02But I think that's how I have my Instagram set up. Is that like I don't I don't want to see I don't want to see those messages. Facebook Messenger, I do. Um, I don't know why I have one up over the other. I think because Instagram, I I send more reels and shit back and forth to a bunch of a bunch of people. So that's all I really that's all I really use Instagram for. And then if I want to message somebody, either text them or shoot them a message on Facebook Messenger.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, Facebook Messenger is good for messaging and stuff. It's also good for another video chat because like me and my brother and my dad have been video chatting like every other day or so smoking and hanging out and shit too, kind of like me and you do. So we've been using Messenger for that. I told my dad, I was like, you need to get WhatsApp, it's better.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, WhatsApp is nice. I love that I can fucking call people from all around the world. It's not like I'm calling a phone and it doesn't charge me or anything like that, so that's what I love it for.
SPEAKER_03Nope, that's awesome. Yeah, it's pretty dope. To all those out there, use WhatsApp, it's awesome.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh boy, I go back to work today.
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah, you've been off for like what 10 days or so?
SPEAKER_0315?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_0312, but no, it was a total of 20 days.
SPEAKER_02Oh shit.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, the first it was that much.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Uh 20.
SPEAKER_03Let me see. Yeah. I took Friday the 1st to the 20th today off.
SPEAKER_02Damn. I guess I didn't realize it was that long.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I'm not getting a paycheck today. Or Friday.
SPEAKER_02Friday, I'm not getting a paycheck because your paycheck was $7.30. Zero.
SPEAKER_03It'll be zero dollars because I literally didn't work at all in between those two weeks.
SPEAKER_02Is that how often you get paid every two weeks?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, every other Friday.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I get all my paychecks. All on the first of the month. Oh, even your British ones? Yeah. Well, that one comes through on the 26th. And then usually the my VA in retirement come through on the 30th or 31st.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Damn, that's crazy. That sucks.
SPEAKER_02It doesn't bother me. Because we just throw a bunch of we just throw a bunch of it in fucking savings count and then live off of live off a couple thousand pounds for the for the month.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. That's what me and Aaron do. Like all the all the most of my all of my VA check goes to uh goes to the mortgage. You know, paying off the mortgage, trying to get the house paid down faster and stuff. Yep. And then the my military retirement pays all the rest of the bills, like my car payment, insurance, you know, fucking gas, shit like that. And then uh Aaron's paycheck and my paycheck is basically, you know, just to fucking do whatever we want with.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Random, random saving if you want, and just going out to eat, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's what we live off of is we live off of her paycheck and my work paycheck and our work paychecks. The rest goes into either savings or the house.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I mean, uh, we just looked at our new mortgage illustration today, and um it's it's 1800 pounds for what we'd be paying every month for our mortgage, but then my paycheck from the school is 2600 pounds and so like I'm just gonna put all of that towards towards the uh the payment. We'll overpay it by you know 800 pounds or so, and then I think every quarter I'll just reevaluate what's going on, and then we could probably overpay it by another thousand or so just from retirement and disability.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So I like I said, I want to pay the fucking house down as quick as possible. So I mean I guess I'll just have to make a few payments, wait maybe three or four or five months, and then figure out how much I'll be able to overpay from there.
SPEAKER_03Because you're limited, right? See, that's what's nice about our loans is like there's no limitation on how much you pay off. I can I could just I could pay a hundred thousand off on one at one time if I want to, and there's no penalty.
SPEAKER_02I think I originally thought that, but I I mean I have to talk to the my uh mortgage broker and see if she can explain that to me. Because it it's very confusing. It seems like it kind of contradicts itself in a couple different uh a couple different um sections of that uh mortgage illustration. So I'm gonna ask her to ask her to explain it.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, because those things can be complicated, you know. Yeah, yeah. Or confusing, you know, to the layman like myself.
SPEAKER_02And and I. Bunch of idiots.
SPEAKER_03Bunch of stupid mechanics, stupid heads, can't even fix a Mustang without breaking it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Damn it.
SPEAKER_02See if Kai wants to come come chat for a sec. Yeah. He had talked about getting on the podcast at one time.
SPEAKER_03No time to come in.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, he just went over to get something out of Kirsty's car, so when he gets out and walks back, I'll yell at him. I don't know what the fuck he's doing. My windshield keeps fucking fogging up. I don't know what it's from. It must be the heat from when I had the car on. Not the heat, but the air.
SPEAKER_03Stop mouth breathing in there. That's what it is.
SPEAKER_02No, that ain't it.
SPEAKER_03You can pass out trying to fucking over.
SPEAKER_02Here he comes. He's coming. Do you want to where what is? Left here. What up? Can you hear? Can you hear Mark? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I don't hear nothing now. Did you put it on silent? You mic the mic silent the phone. Mike silence the microphone.
SPEAKER_01Oh my god, I'm by myself. I'm just talking to myself.
SPEAKER_03I can't hear you guys. Yo, you like mic'd the phone or something. Can you hear me? You can't hear me either? Hola. Hola. Oh la hola. Yeah, so can I. Do the do the head pieces have to be within a certain range of each other? I think it was this one. Can you hear me now? Yeah, yeah. That was weird.
SPEAKER_02Sounds like ass.
SPEAKER_03Sounds like a ass.
SPEAKER_02Unless you're farting. Unless you. Stank booty little boy.
SPEAKER_03Stank booty.
SPEAKER_02Are you sure you didn't fart?
SPEAKER_03Fucking fly keeps attacking me. God damn it. He's winning.
SPEAKER_02You don't have to stay at all.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, what are we talking about?
SPEAKER_02He's just gonna grab a spot.
SPEAKER_04What you said, your side?
SPEAKER_02It should be in my in my drawer, bottom. Bottom, very bottom drawer.
SPEAKER_03Should be in my drawer, bottom. Bottom, very bottom drawer. Bottom drawer. Bottom bottom. He's looking like he's lost some weight or he's growing into his weight. Hello. Not again. Hello.
SPEAKER_01Hello? Hello.
SPEAKER_03Hello. Did you hear what I said?
SPEAKER_02No, I have my earbud out.
SPEAKER_03Oh, both of them? I said Kai looks like he's either losing weight or he's growing into his weight.
SPEAKER_02He's getting taller.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, he's getting taller, so he's growing into it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, he's also watching what he eats too, so it's I guess that's helping out.
SPEAKER_00That's good.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. He'll always tell us, hey, I don't, you know, don't let it, don't let me eat this, don't let me eat that. So anytime he wants to get a snack or something, I'll be like, hey, don't fucking eat it. Don't eat that snack. Why I want it. Nope, don't eat it.
SPEAKER_03I'm like, you you told me not to tell you no, but you told me. Yeah. That's all I'm I'm you told me to say no, and that's all I'm gonna do. Yep. So what is he eating then? Like, so like Autumn, for instance, like doesn't eat meat. Not that she she just never liked meat ever since she was a baby. Yeah. Ever since she's a mother, dude.
SPEAKER_02He'll eat the he'll eat what we make him. I mean, he'll have um a sandwich for lunch with some fucking fruit or a bag of chips. Um, he'll have a couple waffles in the morning. I think that's probably the worst thing he worst thing he eats is just a couple waffles. And then um yeah, so waffles, waffles morning, sandwich and fruit for lunch. Christy makes uh dinner every night, and uh that's it. Every now and then we'll have like a cake or uh some donuts in there.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, my wish Erin wishes that she had somebody that would make her dinner every night when she comes home from work.
SPEAKER_02She needs herself a sugar daddy.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I just hate doing housework. She started laundry and I put it, I I finished it and put it in the dryer. I didn't put I'm not putting it away.
SPEAKER_02You say I I ain't folding it and put it away. Uh-uh.
SPEAKER_03I'll put it on a couch for her.
SPEAKER_02Every now and then I'll fucking fold the laundry. Every now and then that's I fucking hate it. Yeah, I don't particularly like it. I hate it. If Chris is working and it's there, then I'll just I'll just fucking do it.
SPEAKER_03Nah me. I'm a piece of shit. Nah. I don't do dishes either. I'll clean, rinse all the dishes off and all that shit, and like organize them in the sink so that when Aaron does them, it's just all nice and easy to do. Because we don't have a dishwasher anymore.
SPEAKER_02I can't You don't use it or what?
SPEAKER_03It just kept our water so terrible that it kept destroying the damn dishwashers. Uh the calcium deposits and shit in it. So I need to get like a I need to install filtration system on my water, and then I can buy another dishwasher and then go back to using a dishwasher again.
SPEAKER_02Is it just hard water?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yes, the well water is very hard. I had a softener, but it makes the water stink worse than it already does.
SPEAKER_02Really?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it makes it smell way fucking worse. I don't know if just the water gets in there and it I don't know. It just like I haven't bleached the the whale in a while. You're supposed to bleach it like twice a year, you know. But I haven't I haven't bleached it this year yet. I'll probably do that this weekend maybe.
SPEAKER_02Do you have it? Why do you have a cord? I have a cord right here.
SPEAKER_04Oh.
SPEAKER_02But I don't have my keys.
SPEAKER_03You guys are dead again. I don't hear you again. You don't hear me. Because you guys are talking to each other and not listening. I'm gonna go fuck myself.
SPEAKER_02Two hours later.
SPEAKER_03I didn't hear nothing. I didn't hear nothing.
SPEAKER_02What's the last thing you hear me say?
SPEAKER_03I don't remember. I didn't hear none of that.
SPEAKER_02I saw it the other day.
SPEAKER_04Checked in there. What's that?
SPEAKER_02Unless mom has it on her side. I don't know.
SPEAKER_03So what have you been up to? How's school?
SPEAKER_04Boring.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's what Autumn says too. What grade are you in now?
SPEAKER_04Eight.
SPEAKER_03Oh, snap. You're about to be uh about to be a damn freshman then, huh? Is that how it works?
SPEAKER_02I mean it's a year ahead, so I think he would have been a freshman this year. He would have been a freshman, no.
SPEAKER_03He would have been I don't know what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_02They don't call it grade over here, they call it a year.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. So what year does it start with? Like year one instead of kindergarten?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I think so.
SPEAKER_03So you'd be in seventh grade right now?
SPEAKER_02I don't fucking know. He's about to be 13. That's whatever grade that is.
SPEAKER_03Probably 7th or 8th. Because Autumn is 16, she should be a junior. She's about to be a 17.
SPEAKER_02Brooke would be graduating from ninth grade, moving to 10th. Kyle would be moving to 8th.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that sounds appropriate. So they're a year ahead. Guess what I said? Start with year one instead of kindergarten. That's what it sounds like.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. There's one bark. Where's the other?
SPEAKER_02Wait for waiting for Slinky. Waiting for the spam call.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, he's not. Yeah, the spam call's not happening yet. It happened just before. Like literally just before you called. I thought it was you calling. It was the spam call.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Fucking spam call.
SPEAKER_04I want to get called by a scammer.
SPEAKER_02You want tickets called? You want to get called?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I'm just gonna forward my phone number to his phone. Yeah. You'll get 26 of them a day. Alright. That's how many I get. Roughly. Most of them are machines. No? You guys don't have a lot of spam calls over there?
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_03Most of them.
SPEAKER_02I haven't had I haven't had any. I don't hear about people talking about it at work.
SPEAKER_03Hmm. You guys you guys get the spam calls where it's Americans calling? That'd be funny. There was Slinky, by the way. There was the Slinky bike. There he goes. He's chasing after somebody. Let's see who he's chasing after.
SPEAKER_02Probably Amazon driver.
SPEAKER_03No, it's the neighbors. Slinky! Leave them alone! They're taking out their trash. Leave them alone. That's the neighbor.
SPEAKER_01This is like one big thing. It's fine October something.
SPEAKER_03So what have you been collecting lately?
SPEAKER_01Huh?
SPEAKER_03What have you been collecting lately?
SPEAKER_04Funko's.
SPEAKER_03Funko's?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh damn, I got a lot of Funko's in boxes. I got like two or three hundred of them sitting in boxes.
SPEAKER_04Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. It's like a couple thousand, like fifteen hundred dollars worth of damn Funko Pops just sitting there. Um buy 'em.
SPEAKER_04I'll have them.
SPEAKER_03You want 'em? They're all Star Wars and Marvel and DC. What else? I think that's basically it. Star Wars, Marvel, and DC. What is that? Cauliflower?
SPEAKER_01It was like yogurt and little strawberry bus. But they're all melted, so they're like one bit now.
SPEAKER_03Oh geez.
SPEAKER_02Fucking snacking.
SPEAKER_03Snacking. Gwats in that figure.
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Is it December or is it November?
unknownDecember.
SPEAKER_03For what?
SPEAKER_01It expires.
SPEAKER_03Expires?
SPEAKER_01Expires.
SPEAKER_03Oh. It's still good, even after it expires. Depending on what it is. It's not milk. You don't want to be drinking no milk after it expires. Not long after it expires, at least, anyways.
SPEAKER_02How do you eat meat after it expires?
SPEAKER_03Well, that depends. If you froze it in time.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Leave a steak out for a fucking couple weeks and see what happens.
SPEAKER_03Then freeze it. No, you know it happens. That's what they do with like 28-day aged meat and stuff. They let it all sit out and then it gets all moldy and stuff. They cut the mold off. And then the rest that's left is your deliciously aged meat. I used to only buy. Go ahead. No, go ahead. No, you.
SPEAKER_01No, you.
SPEAKER_03I forgot already.
SPEAKER_01We're going to a steakhouse.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Where a steakhouse on Saturday. Okay. Somewhere in town.
SPEAKER_00Have you been before?
SPEAKER_02No, I hadn't.
SPEAKER_00Oh, is your first time going?
SPEAKER_02They do one of those uh steak challenges, 72-ounce steak challenge.
SPEAKER_00Do they really?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Are you gonna try it?
SPEAKER_02I might.
SPEAKER_0372 ounce steak. What else do you have to eat with it?
SPEAKER_02Uh I'm not sure. I'll have to look it up.
SPEAKER_03Because if it's like a baked potato or some fries or something, I couldn't do it. But if it's just 72 ounces of meat, I think I could do it.
SPEAKER_01I could do it. I don't think I can do it. There's no way. Well, how much are 72 ounces? 5.5 pounds. Just over five pounds. 5.3 pounds, I think.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's a lot of that's a lot of meat. 72 ounces of meat. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I mean if it's just the steak, yeah, you should try it. It's a 72 ounce cut of meat. After they fry it, it loses a little bit of fat.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, loses a little bit of weight.
SPEAKER_02So it it probably gets down to about say 68 ounces. 67 ounces. End it. I don't know. We'll see.
SPEAKER_00Why, dude? Why?
SPEAKER_02I can see it on your arm. I can see it on your arm. Is that it?
SPEAKER_03Yes. I've missed it.
SPEAKER_02I can see it.
SPEAKER_03Motherfucker.
SPEAKER_02Because you're blind. I thought you were too hot. Fucking blind ass. I got uh fucking hot.
SPEAKER_03You thought he was just you thought he was just making it up?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Dude, I got good eyesight still too. I don't know how, dude. My dad lost his around 40. I'm 40, coming up on 43 now.
SPEAKER_02I got a blanket in the trunk if you want it.
SPEAKER_03I mean cold?
SPEAKER_02It's getting a little chilly. I mean sure.
SPEAKER_03It's been it's been chilly all day today. It's only gotten to the high 60s, I think. What is it now? Now is the warmest it's been because it'd been raining. It's 75 now. It's been raining all day. Supposed to rain all week, dude, till next Friday. You guys are broke up again. You guys are broke up again. Broke up again. There it is.
SPEAKER_02You here now?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_03So weird that it keeps doing that, huh?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I don't know why.
SPEAKER_03So what else you got going on? How was work today?
SPEAKER_02Um, it was good. I had to drive out to Ely this morning and uh do a site survey. Oh good. Yeah, that was cool. So that was cool. No, I got to go down there pretty early, went out, looked at these units, and felt a lot better about the project after looking at the units and figuring out that we're not gonna need to do as much work as we thought we were gonna have to. We have a good idea on kit and where we're gonna get a lot of the equipment and shit for it. So it made me feel a lot better about that project today. And then I met up with uh a buddy for lunch, and so they were out at Fairford, and he had to drive out to Milton Hall for some shit, so he hit me up and said, Hey, we're gonna fucking be in the area. So we met at five guys and had some five guys for and uh then the second half of the day I just fucking nailed out a bunch of shit.
SPEAKER_03Nice. I haven't done shit today. Actually, I take that back. I did stream, I made 44 bucks, but other than that, like I haven't done shit.
SPEAKER_01It's not that funny. What is that's funny because I was just talking about like how we feel accomplished, and you're just like, I haven't done shit.
SPEAKER_03Dude, I haven't done nothing. That's the complete opposite helpless. But once that fucking part comes in, you know, then I'll replace those. But I also found out that I didn't install uh two rubber grommets that need to be installed.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So I have to take the shocks back out and install the grommets. See you, buddy.
SPEAKER_02Robbie said bye.
unknownBye.
SPEAKER_03So, yeah, I still have to fucking take care of that again. So I have to pull them all, so I have to pull the wheels back off, which is the worst part. Because the lug nuts are a pain in the dick. The way that they just barely fit in there. I have to fit a perfectly sized 21 millimeter socket. My 21 millimeter like uh lug nut ones don't work. Oh no. Just went out again. This is some bullshit. Hello, hello. I don't know why the fuck it does that. I don't what is it doing?
SPEAKER_02It keeps it keeps auto-connecting to the car.
SPEAKER_03Is that what it's doing?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh. Almost got that motherfucker. I missed.
SPEAKER_02You said you almost got him.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, he was on top of my phone, so I tried to fucking try to murder his ass. Fucking missed. What were you talking about before disconnected again? Uh, it doesn't matter.
SPEAKER_02Uh, whatever. I mean, it's that time anyway, so yeah, it is. Yeah. Alright, guys, thanks for listening. Take care, stay safe.
SPEAKER_03Be safe, make good choices.
SPEAKER_02Bye! Bye.