Fantasy Football with the Dork and the Dude.

Back for NFL 2026

The Dork and The Dude

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0:00 | 42:04

The Dork and Dude do an episode just to get the feel for NFL 2026. We talk win totals, division winners and super bowl odds. Next week we start with fantasy.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm the dork, and that's our retro music. Yeah, it is. That's our first year one.

SPEAKER_02

That's our first theme song.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yeah. All right. It's all good. Okay. We just wanted to uh, you know, jump in before training camp here. It should be out in what, a week or two?

SPEAKER_02

Training camp?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

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Uh middle of July.

SPEAKER_03

It is middle of July. It's Bastial Day, dude.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Uh okay. A week or two, yeah. A week or two, okay. This is dead time right now, Doris.

SPEAKER_03

This is dead time, but we wanted to warm up, get get to have a shakedown, get some of the glitches out. Definitely. So we're gonna get into uh you know, everything's kind of done. The teams are what they are. There might be a big deal, but who knows?

SPEAKER_02

Uh maybe a training camp injury.

SPEAKER_03

A training, definitely a training camp injury, and some dude will have showed up fat and out of shape, and you know, you'll hear all about that. Some dude'll get arrested, and you know that's all to happen, but that's all hard to predict.

SPEAKER_02

We'll let the clowns the clowns cover that.

SPEAKER_03

The clowns sort themselves out, yeah. Um, so what I wanted to do, uh, you know, it again focus we'll get to fantasy next week. Yep. But uh right now I want to focus on season bets and what we like, what teams we like, maybe what teams we don't like.

SPEAKER_02

I have already got a lot down, Dork.

SPEAKER_03

You do, you do, and um we already have some bets, side bets here.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, yeah. Uh refresh our memories.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, um, Dork and Dude. I have on the New York Giants, I'm under seven and a half, you're over seven and a half. Okay. On Atlanta, Dirty Bird. I'm over six and a half, you're under six and a half. In Carolina, I'm under seven and a half, you're over seven and a half. I like it. So well, I do too. Those are those are good solid bets. Um okay, and but anyways, I wanted to start by five overs I really like, and five unders I I like as well.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

And um first with uh the overs, um, I think the obvious one, it just stands out like a sore thumb. And that would be Denver. The guns under nine and a half.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I mean, are you kidding me? Uh I uh that was that was the first bet I made this offseason.

SPEAKER_03

I remember that. And that that's I just don't get it.

SPEAKER_02

I don't either. Uh I guess Vegas thinks the Chargers are gonna be better, the Chiefs will be back. Uh you know, possible. I don't get it. Uh I'm thinking I think they minimum they go 10 and 7.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. I'm with you on that one, Barbara. I mean, that's one of the most talented teams in the league. Best defense. Best defense quarterback. Right there with Houston. Young quarterback, young, I would call him a usable quarterback, even though he could stand to improve.

SPEAKER_02

Well, that's another thing, too, is they're worried about uh next coming back from the ankle injury.

SPEAKER_03

Oh boy, nine and a half. I'm sorry, that team won. They should have won the AFC last year, if not for that. I hear you. Uh my next one is Seattle. Okay. They were they were at nine and a half when I made this list last week. Uh-huh. They did jump up to ten and a half. Okay. I still like them. I mean, they're the defending champs. They're one of the younger teams in the league. I hear you. That their coach obviously knows what he's doing. I I think they could win 11 easily and maybe more. Only, and this is a caveat with Denver, too. It is a tough division.

SPEAKER_02

It is. But uh that is disrespectful to the Super Bowl champ.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I think so. I think so.

SPEAKER_02

I agree with that. I haven't bet it uh uh uh but I agree.

SPEAKER_03

Uh uh one more I like.

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Uh I could also see you know a scenario where uh the rookie running back price doesn't pan out. Uh Donald leads the league in turnovers again. I could see that. Uh and uh the defense uh drops off a little bit, and and oh you never know. Maybe finish 10 and 10.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, it's a very competitive league, and if they drop off just a little, they may be out of the playoffs. You never know. So um, yeah, but I just see them I just think ten and a half is too low.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, uh I agree, but I'm not gonna put any money on it.

SPEAKER_03

Another ten and a half of my boys I think is way too low is uh the Eagles, Philadelphia. Bet them. I um I just see them as the biggest contender to the Rams and Seahawks in the NFC. I agree. I don't see I mean a team might burst out of the north, but I I couldn't tell you who. Yep.

SPEAKER_02

Every year they're solid, you can book them for 11 wins.

SPEAKER_03

You can book them, and um it's like they might be on an every other year thing in the Super Bowl. Sure. And I've seen teams do that before, and uh I they're a smart organization, I expect them to get it fixed. Um they had a distraction in AJ, they got rid of them.

SPEAKER_02

I agree. They're a solid organization, they draft as well as anybody.

SPEAKER_03

And they're one of the youngest teams in the league, too.

SPEAKER_02

They are so um and they're in a division where uh I'm not high on the commanders. Uh they're one of the oldest fucking teams. People in the league.

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Yeah.

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Uh and uh uh Dan Quinn, I think, is circling the drain.

SPEAKER_03

I I gather I think that too, yeah. And I'm not wild about the Giants or Cowboys either.

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I like I like the Giants to improve. Uh the Cowboys I think will make the playoffs.

SPEAKER_03

They might, but I'm they might rabbit. I'm a little uh we'll see on the Cowboys. Uh the other one, Cleveland, five and a half over.

SPEAKER_02

Uh uh let me see my win totals here. Five and a half?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I imagine you didn't write the juice down as usual. I I didn't. Could you start doing that, man?

SPEAKER_03

I I can, but this is just do I think are they gonna win more of the game? What okay.

SPEAKER_02

Um uh I got them. Uh I said, screw it, they're better than five and a half. Uh I bumped them up to uh seven uh over seven and a half at plus one seventy.

SPEAKER_03

I like it. I like it.

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Um I think they can go eight and eight and nine.

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They have one of the best defense in the league, defenses in the league, even without Garrett.

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Yep, they got a good offensive line.

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They have assembled some good weapons, and it's just a matter of getting some quarterback play.

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Yep, they had a good draft.

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I think their quarterback play will be improved.

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I agree. Couldn't get any worse.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, exactly. Um, so I think, and I don't think the AFC North is that good.

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I agree. Uh, with my luck, though, I I bet them over seven and a half, but they'll go seven and ten.

SPEAKER_03

We'll see, but this is five and a half.

SPEAKER_02

I shouldn't say that. I had I have good luck, Dor.

SPEAKER_03

You do have good luck. Uh, in the fifth is uh another one of your teams, and I don't see their hat there, and I don't know what's going on, but it's the Saints.

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Uh I don't have a Saints hat.

SPEAKER_03

Seven and a half. I think they're gonna win that division, dude.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I love it. I uh that was like the second bet I made. I don't have a Saints hat uh because I have a polo.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, that's right.

SPEAKER_02

That's right. I remember that. Yeah. Uh which I'll be wearing uh through the course of the season from time to time.

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Okay, the five unders.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, well let me give you my win total over that I bet. Yeah, yeah. Uh since we're on win totals. This is what I bet. I won't tell you how much, but okay, I got I got my Titans over six and a half at minus one ten. I got the Broncos over nine and a half at minus one ten. I got the Bengals over nine and a half at minus one fifteen. I got the Saints over seven and a half at minus one ten. Vikings over eight and a half at plus one fifteen. Hell, they won nine games with the worst quarterback playing the league last year. They did. Uh I love that bet. Giants over seven and a half. Well, we disagree on that one. I got them at minus one oh five. I got the Panthers over seven and a half at uh plus one fifteen. I got the Jags over nine and a half at even money. Hell, they won 12 games last year. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

It was at 13. I like that too. I like Cone as a coach. I'm not Hell yeah. I'm not wild about their draft. Longer term thing.

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They botched the draft the last two years, in my opinion.

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Yeah.

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But uh they've they're loaded talent-wise.

SPEAKER_03

That division, that division is kind of funky. They could go either way, I think. Uh-huh. That any team in that division.

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As we talked about, I took the Eagles over 10.5 at at plus one twenty-five, which is is almost like stealing. I agree. Uh and I got the Browns over seven and a half at plus one seventy, like I mentioned. I like that. I I we'll talk talk a little later about the Browns more. Okay. And then I got the Bills at over 11.5 at plus one fifty-five. Uh, I could have got them at ten and a half, uh, but uh I said, fuck it, they're gonna win twelve games, I'm gonna get the plus one fifty-five money, baby.

SPEAKER_03

You know what I think with the coaching change? I think it's gonna go one way or another. Yeah, it could be. I think it could. Brady could look like a damn genius. Right. And they win 12, 13 games, sure, which they do almost every year anyway. And um, or they're gonna miss McDermott's steady, uh, you know, steady helmsmanship.

SPEAKER_02

I think Brady just doesn't have to fuck up.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. But um I I do like that, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh so that's that's the overs I got.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, here are my uh the uh the five unders I like. Go, Dork. Cincinnati, ten and a half. Oh, let's bet that. I just look at the talent and I I am just not wild about that team. Let's let's do a side bet. Let's do a side bet.

SPEAKER_02

I'm all over Cincinnati, and that'll come up later in the discussion.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, ten dollars. Yep. Dork has under ten and a half.

SPEAKER_02

Yep.

SPEAKER_03

And I got dude is over. You got it. Ten and a half. Let's do it, dude. You got it. It's good to get a side bet in right away.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it is. And the season's gonna be honest before we know it, Dork.

SPEAKER_03

I know. So I better save my money. Yeah, you better. Another one. Uh Washington, under seven and a half. Well, I I like that. Uh they're the oldest team again.

SPEAKER_02

I I bet them at under six and a half at plus one seventy.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Only concern for me is uh Daniels coming back and you know, just being a stud again.

SPEAKER_02

Like he was I don't know. I think he might be uh injury prone. He might be, yeah. And I mean the dude wasn't the dude's as skinny as me.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. So um and they're the like we said, they're the oldest team again, and their talent just ain't that great.

SPEAKER_02

Uh uh their draft, I don't know. Uh that's uh long term. Dan Quinn might not even be there to see the cats he drafted this year and play uh their second season. Because I think if they end up, well, I uh I bet them under six and a half. I'm I'm expecting to go uh like six and uh uh whatever that works out, to Dork 11.

SPEAKER_03

6 and 11. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Or 6'10 and they go six and eleven, he's gone.

SPEAKER_03

Yep. Um Baltimore under 11 and a half.

SPEAKER_02

I I wanted to bet that I'm just not seeing it with that team. I'm on the fence. I mean, they're still talented, but last year might have been the start of the decline.

SPEAKER_03

That uh Lamar isn't running as much.

SPEAKER_02

He got hurt again last year. Yeah, he just Henry a year older. I'm not wide the defense is they've got one wide receiver, Zay Flowers.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

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Uh uh the defense was uh uh bottom ten last year. Yep.

SPEAKER_03

Uh so I I like that. Um, Tennessee, six and a half. Under? Yes. Let's bet it. Let's bet. Let's do it, man. I I've already bet them over. I mean, uh, this one worries me, but um I trust Salah.

SPEAKER_02

Cam Ward's second year. Uh they they uh were awesome in free agency. They drafted well.

SPEAKER_03

All true.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I'm not as big a Sala fan. Watch what he does with that defense. Look what he did with the Niners last year. They were a fucking walking mash unit.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, but he was with the DC. Look what he did with the Jets the three years before that.

SPEAKER_02

It's the fucking Jets. Uh, you could take fucking Linzel Vince Lombardi and throw him on the Jets and he'd lose.

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But he's dead, Jim.

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Uh uh. But you know what I'm saying?

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Yeah, I know what you're saying.

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It's a fucked up organization.

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They they must have sold their soul to win that third Super Bowl, you know, and now they're paying for it.

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Uh uh Salo was hungry for a head coaching position, and sometimes those guys they go to the wrong team.

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Yeah.

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And it fucks up their career. But he goes back to the Niners and boom, now he's with the Titans, baby.

SPEAKER_03

Speaking of uh that Super Bowl, do you know that's the only Super Bowl that, at least under the current rules, will never happen again? How's that? Uh, because it's the Colts and the Jets, and they're both in the AFC. I gotcha. After the merger, the Colts, I believe Colts, Steelers, and Browns move to the AFC. Right. Okay, finally, the fifth one is the Giants, and we've already bet that. Yeah, we have. I just don't think they're all that good.

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Uh, I trust Harbaugh. Uh uh, they've got some talented players.

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They do.

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Um their defense towards the end of second half of last season was looking better. Uh thing firm up the offensive line, and Jackson Dark can take the step. Uh uh, they could win nine, ten games.

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They could, and that isn't, I think that is an easy division.

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And what I like about Harbaugh is if it gets down uh to crunch time uh in close games and stuff, he's not one of these coaches usually that vapor locks and uh uh uh makes a wrong decision to cost him in a close game and shit. So he'll squeeze he'll squeeze out two wins just on his coaching. At least that's my opinion, Dory.

SPEAKER_03

That's that's a good opinion. Yeah, it is. Um how about your Super Bowl bets?

SPEAKER_02

Wait, I get a couple more win total unders that we didn't talk about. Uh I've got the Falcons under six and a half, uh, your dirty birds.

SPEAKER_03

You know, I've kind of taken them on as uh as an Put them on your logo instead of instead of the professor. No, I don't think it's the professor now. I think it's it's either Bazooka Joe, Rockin' Randall, or oh, I know who it is. It's from the a poster from the movie Gus a Field Goal Kicking V.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, that's right, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

It's Don Knott's, I think.

SPEAKER_02

I don't know how far that's gonna carry you, Doric. I don't know. Okay, and then I I got the Patriots under nine and a half at plus one twenty. The number was uh ten and a half, but I said, fuck it, I'm gonna juice it.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

Uh Chargers under nine and a half. Uh I'm not impressed with them.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I got them at plus one ten. And then I got the Steelers under uh I juiced them too. Uh I got them under seven and a half uh at plus one thirty. I think they're gonna be a fucking disaster.

SPEAKER_03

I'm a little I'm I kind of like the Steelers.

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In fact, um with fucking Aaron Rodgers.

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Karen? Aaron, you know, he's an all-time great. He's washed. He's not what he was, but he if he can game manage.

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I think in most statistics, he was like quarterback twenty-three last year. Okay. Uh where's that gonna get you? Who knows? Uh we do know. Okay, well, those guys get it right.

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If um gun to my head, I had to pick one team to bet on, this is who I'd take.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

And it has to do as much with value as anything. That's what it's all about. Yeah, AFC East, I'd just go with Miami at plus four thousand. Because they're the long shot. Forty to one. Forty to one. Yeah. I bet just five bucks, but uh yeah, you might as well go buy a taco. I'm very curious.

SPEAKER_02

You might as well go buy a taco.

SPEAKER_03

I'm very curious to see what Malik Willis can do.

SPEAKER_02

I forgot.

SPEAKER_03

Huh?

SPEAKER_02

I said you might as well buy a five dollar taco, but I forgot you don't eat tacos.

SPEAKER_03

I do eat tacos, but they gotta be bad. Yeah. That's not a taco. Well, you know, don't be a taco Nazi, dude.

SPEAKER_02

No tacos for you. No, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

I'm just telling you, if they told me to make a bet on this, that's the team I'd bet.

SPEAKER_02

Uh okay.

SPEAKER_03

Uh I can't see it, but uh I think it was both Pittsburgh plus 510 and Cleveland plus 2100. Just because I don't think much of Baltimore or Cincinnati. Okay, I'm all over Cincinnati, so I don't like that. Okay. AFC South. And again, if I had to make a bet, I know I had them on the under, but Tennessee plus 800. My boys! Again, I I think any team could win that division.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, uh, I've got, uh since you just mentioned them, I've got the Titans to win the AFC South at plus 750. Okay, they're up to 800 now. Yeah, I missed the boat a little bit, but uh that was one of my early bets, too, man. I'm I'm buying in on Sala.

SPEAKER_03

AFC West, uh Denver plus 225. I mean, come on, they're the third favorite. I got them at plus two fifteen. Okay. Uh NFC East. I don't like any of the teams other than Philly there, and they're plus 115, so I'll take that.

SPEAKER_02

I hear you. I haven't betted, but I but that's a good bet.

SPEAKER_03

NFC North, Minnesota plus 510. Got them. Again, I I think all I see all four is any team could win. Yep. Detroit seems to be getting a lot of love from the bookies, and I can kind of see that.

SPEAKER_02

Right. Uh I got I got Minnesota plus 550.

SPEAKER_03

And I still, he's had a lot of success, but I still am waiting for Dan Campbell to kind of cramp. And burned for some reason.

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Uh uh the fire started at the end of last season when he started play calling.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02

Uh so he's gonna crash and burn this year. In the south? And you know what? Uh, the only thing that'll keep him from crashing and burning uh and self-destructing uh because he's due is the fact he's got a hell of a lot of talent.

SPEAKER_03

He does. He does.

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So I I'm not betting against or for Detroit because they could go uh sideways.

SPEAKER_03

I agree. They might win 15 games like two years ago. They might they might win six and have it all circled a drain. Yeah, and Campbell gets axed. Um, in the South, my guys, the Dirty Birds, Atlanta, plus 425. Hate it. I could again, I could see any team winning that division.

SPEAKER_02

They're clowns.

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Yeah.

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Uh uh every year, well, they've got probably the fifth worst record over the last four years.

SPEAKER_03

Well, they got a new coach. They've really had some bad coaches in there the last two. Quarterback problem. Well, they got Tua. And they got Penix. And they got Penix.

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Yeah. Uh I'm I'm not impressed with either one. I think Tua might be washed.

SPEAKER_03

We'll see. He's had questions. I I think if he's gonna succeed, being in a dome in the south is the best place for him to do it. Sure. Um, that's that's my thoughts on Tua. And in the West, um what bet do I like the best? The Niners at plus 305. I like that bet. Because I I saw we had talked about this last week. The Cardinals are plus 10,000 or 100 to 1 just to win the division.

SPEAKER_02

No, it it it can't be that high. It is.

SPEAKER_03

Go check DraftKings. Okay. Just to win that division. I thought they were like 40 to 1. I've never seen that before. I thought they were 30 or 40 to 1. Check it out when you get a chance.

SPEAKER_02

I think you got it wrong, Dork, but I I don't. Okay.

SPEAKER_03

I I I I I might throw just a dollar on them just to say I called it.

SPEAKER_02

I hear you.

SPEAKER_03

But um, I've never seen that. And in the division, it usually tops out at 20 or 25.

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That's the toughest division in football.

SPEAKER_03

It is. You got you got three teams that you if someone told you at the end of the season those will be the three best teams in most power ratings, no one would be surprised. That's for damn sure. So, yeah. And I guess that's why Arizona's 100 to 1 to win the division. Right.

SPEAKER_02

I like the I like the Niners bet.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. So do you have any div you did you mention them or uh uh any you didn't mention you like?

SPEAKER_02

The AFC South, uh the division winners? Yeah. Uh I've covered them all. Okay. Okay. Uh uh it's Broncos, Panthers, Titans, Vikings for me, is what I bet.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, and I I didn't see it, but um what did what what are your thoughts on, and this was when I was just looking at, you know, my model.

SPEAKER_02

Sure. I I finished my model last night.

SPEAKER_03

What do you think about a Philadelphia-Kansas City Super Bowl, a rematch of two years ago?

SPEAKER_02

It could happen. Uh you could probably get that uh they're both 16 to 1. You could probably get that as a prop bet uh uh 150 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

I think I'll do that. Okay, uh so Not that I'm pulling for it, believe me.

SPEAKER_02

I hear you. Uh you want me to give you my playoff parlays, I bet?

SPEAKER_03

I'd love to hear them, dude.

SPEAKER_02

I feel better about some than others. But uh you that's the way to get good odds, throw three teams together. Okay, I got the Titans, Panthers, and Vikings to make the playoffs at 31-1. Titans, Panthers, Vikings.

SPEAKER_03

Why not? Uh Panthers. I really can't argue against any of them. They're teams in transition. Sure. I could find reasons to like them and reasons to dislike them. You hate the Panthers. But it's not like you're saying Miami, Arizona, and the Jets to all make the playoffs. There you go. These uh just to be just to be way out there. Carolina made it the playoffs last year. All three teams have a path to the playoffs. So yeah, I like it.

SPEAKER_02

Panthers made it last year, Vikings the year before. Uh, so I like that. Uh I got the Saints, the Jags, and the Giants to make the playoffs at 19-1.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

I've got uh the Bengals, Jags, and Vikings at plus 720.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

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And then I've got the Patriots, the Lions, and the Seahawks to miss the playoffs at 18 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

And I've got the Chargers, Packers, and Chiefs to miss the playoffs at 15 to 1.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Again, I I could those are all teams that I I I'm calling the calling it right now, Dork. Go either way, but you're really on the Trevor bandwagon.

SPEAKER_02

I'm uh I'm not done with Trevor either.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, oh man.

SPEAKER_02

I hear it. What was I gonna say? Uh what was he gonna do here? Uh oh, here's what I was gonna do. Hang on, dude.

SPEAKER_01

Uh you did a boss of that.

SPEAKER_02

Uh here's what's gonna happen to the Chiefs, because they're gonna finish third in their fucking division. They're gonna get gunned down. Uh, okay, so uh where what where was I, Dork? What where were what were we doing?

SPEAKER_03

You were just talking about your playoff parlays.

SPEAKER_02

Oh yeah. My playoff parlays. Uh where were okay. That's them. That's all I got.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

I've got one, two, three, four, five parlays.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Can I read you some MVP bets? I don't know if I'm gonna bet them, but they caught my eye.

SPEAKER_02

I'll show I'll tell you what I've already bet.

SPEAKER_03

When I was looking at it. Okay. Okay. Jalen Hurts, 28 to 1. I like it.

SPEAKER_02

Uh except for the fact that he doesn't put up stats.

SPEAKER_03

He doesn't, yeah. And so And he is running less.

SPEAKER_02

You'd have to win, they'd have to win like 14 fucking games to 14 games.

SPEAKER_03

He'd have to get a lot of rushing yards and touchdowns and more passing yards than you've ever got. So that's probably Thanks, dude. You've just talked me out of that.

SPEAKER_02

Well, and somebody else uh who's uh uh uh more of a publicity cat would win it.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And um they're not gonna give it to Jalen Hurts if uh Josh Allen's close or dude.

SPEAKER_03

This is why we employ critical thinking skills and ask questions.

SPEAKER_02

That's it, man.

SPEAKER_03

Damn right.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I'm glad I got you off that bat. Okay. But I mean a 28 to 1, five bucks, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. How about Jared Goff, 35 to 1?

SPEAKER_02

Uh I saw that when I was betting it. Uh he's another non-glamour guy.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh that doesn't toot his own horn, so he probably's out of it. So, but so I was um he didn't win it when they won 15 games.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Next week we're gonna probably do quarterbacks. Mm-hmm. You know, for fantasy. Yep. And I I've been looking at him. Jared Goff is good for like 4,500 yards and 35 touchdowns. Well, or yeah. Uh uh Why is he so low in these rankings?

SPEAKER_02

I don't know about 35 touchdowns, but uh in our league scoring, I I think he he was in the top ten.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Anyways, um, okay, these are the then we get to the ones that are a little out there. Daniel Jones plus 7,500.

SPEAKER_02

For MVP? Yeah. You mean 70, 70, okay.

SPEAKER_03

Oh 7500, yeah. Yeah. 75 to 1.

SPEAKER_02

Don't like it coming off an Achilles. That's true. That's true.

SPEAKER_03

Uh that's never good.

SPEAKER_02

He did play really well.

SPEAKER_03

As someone coming off an Achilles.

SPEAKER_02

Uh yeah. Yeah, you you know all about that.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I hate it.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Um Malik Willis, 100 to 1.

SPEAKER_02

With Miami?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. You know, those are probably not high enough odds. Uh no, he should be 300 to 1. And speaking of 300 to 1, that's what Tua is.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. Is that worth a dollar? He's 300 to 1. Yeah. Uh yeah, I'd throw a buck. Hell yeah, I'd throw a buck in a heartbeat on that. Okay. Let me tell you what I got, Doric? Yeah. Uh I got Kyler Murray, 40 to 1. Yeah, yeah, I saw that one. That's and then I've got uh my boy. Trev uh Herbert, you're not my boy. I I got my boy Farah uh at 22 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And you know, I I was looking at Farah played almost like an MVP last year.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

I was looking at Herbert's numbers, and he he is what he is. I don't know what happened. He he started off like he was gonna be another merino. He's flatlined. And he's flatlined, and it's sad. It is. I don't get it either. We love our Oregon boys, you know.

SPEAKER_02

We love them, but uh that's why I'm I'm I'm betting the Chargers under. Yeah. Uh and he gets hurt. Uh even at the end of last season, uh uh uh he fucked up his hand going into the playoffs.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

You know, he's kind of injury prone. Yep. Which is weird because he's a big dude.

SPEAKER_03

He's a big dude. He's he's he can run, he's he's he's just got a lot of skills.

SPEAKER_02

I don't know what it is. There's something about that team that it's an intangible. Uh every year, the top uh for the last four or five years, the talk has been about how the whole team's injury prone.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. And they are. And I I know they're not in San Diego anymore. Right. But there is just something about San Diego. I mean, the LA Clippers started in well, they actually started in Buffalo, but they moved to San Diego. Right. And um the San Diego Padres, they've been around over 50 years and never won a championship. Yep. San Diego Chargers, I think they may have won in the AFC.

SPEAKER_02

They went to a Super Bowl.

SPEAKER_03

They went to a they lost to the Niners in one, and that may have been it.

SPEAKER_02

That was it.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. But they had the Fouts era. Yep. Oh, you know that I went to uh The John Hadel era?

SPEAKER_02

Yes. That's old school.

SPEAKER_03

That's AFL there, I think. Yeah, it is. I went to a uh a concert in Sisters, uh-huh. Keb Moe, if you've heard of him. I have I've seen him advertised. Good, good, real good blues singer. Right. And um it was a fundraiser for Sisters School District. Okay. Master of ceremonies, Dan Fouts. Like it. You know, he just comes out and says, Hi, I'm Dan Dan Fouts, and you know, we know he lives in Sisters. Sure. But uh I guess him and his wife are very active in the community. Yeah. And uh just good people. Sure. So there you go. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh I uh met Dan Fouts on the golf course in Sun River in Sun River when I was working.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, he used to like to play the North Course.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Now called the Woodlands. You meet a lot of celebs on the golf course in your life. Yeah, Marcus Allen, too. Clinice.

SPEAKER_02

Yep.

SPEAKER_03

Doesn't get much bigger than that.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but Eastwood was in a tournament, uh uh the uh Bing Crosby uh Pro Am. Crosby Pro Am, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So I was a spectator, and my dad and I got there fairly early in the morning, and it was foggy as hell. And I think we went like straight to the second tee to watch people teeing off because when we got to the first tee, the for uh group had left or something. Yeah. And anyway, uh and uh Clint's there uh teeing off, and there's nobody around, it's just me and my dad uh uh and the the golfers, yeah, and there's no security back in those days.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So uh Clint Eastwood hits his uh ball and shit and starts walking down the fairway. I said, fuck it. I started walking alongside him on the fairway and said, uh, how's it going today, Mr. Uh Eastwood? And he and he says something like, I could uh hit that T-shot a little better or something. And I said, Well, I just want to say hi and I've appreciated your movies over the years and shit.

SPEAKER_03

And that was uh Yeah, that's the way to do it.

SPEAKER_02

Yep.

SPEAKER_03

Now you'd be even you'd be tackled before you got near the fairway. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And if and plus, if Clint East was out there today, uh it might be bad for him because he might have a heart attack on hole six.

SPEAKER_03

Clint is getting up.

SPEAKER_02

What is that cat? Like 90 something? Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so where were we, Dork?

SPEAKER_03

Clint Eastwood. No, I believe uh do you want to go uh uh how about rookie of the year? Any any thoughts on that?

SPEAKER_02

Well, I've already bet my boy Stribling, wide receiver San Francisco, at 55 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

You know, I saw him, and I'm thinking Evans is gonna get a lot of the love there. Which means he gets single coverage. Yeah, that's true. Um I and I don't doubt him.

SPEAKER_02

Plus, I don't know how much Evans can stretch the field anymore. He's gonna be more of a goal line guy.

SPEAKER_03

Goal line possession, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

The stribling can stretch the field. Yeah. And that's why they drafted him because they didn't have a guy like that.

SPEAKER_03

How about Pearshaw or Pearsall's gonna be a bust. Okay.

SPEAKER_02

He can't stay healthy.

SPEAKER_03

And Iuk is gonna get traded, I assume.

SPEAKER_02

He's not on he's not on the team. He's not even to be discussed at this point if you're a bit.

SPEAKER_03

Is he officially off the team?

SPEAKER_02

He'll never play a down.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. What a clown he's been.

SPEAKER_02

He's he's destroying his career.

SPEAKER_03

What is it about why I mean, even Brady, and I hate to agree with Tom Brady. Right. He made a comment recently about receivers. Like, what is it with them?

SPEAKER_02

I hear you.

SPEAKER_03

Why they just have a tendency to uh go off the rails like that.

SPEAKER_02

I hear you, but they do.

SPEAKER_03

You know, I think that's all I got. Okay. Uh oh, rookie, my favorite rookies of the year are the two Penn State running backs, Nicholas Singleton for Tennessee and Kate Tron Allen for Washington. I also like Anthony, Anthony Hill, the linebacker for Tennessee a lot. Okay, I think they're all about 60 to 1. Uh Anthony Hill reminds me of uh Schlesinger Schlesinger from last year.

SPEAKER_02

I bet Anthony Hill, on some on some writers' advice, yeah, uh, when the numbers came out, I got him 40 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

You know, for a dude who has the Titans under, I sure am liking a lot of them, aren't I?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Anthony Hill might, if he wins uh defensive rookie of the year, the Titans could win 10 fucking games. They might. I mean I okay, and I've also, even though he's won it once already, yeah, I've got Kevin O'Connell, coach of the year 30 to 1.

SPEAKER_03

At 30 to 1, why not? That's that that you know, they win that division. Yeah. Kyler has uh career revival under him. How did they get to the NFC championship game? I mean, he he's he's a very good coach. Um 30 to 1, come on.

SPEAKER_02

That's what I was saying.

SPEAKER_03

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02

And if the uh and and they don't have any problem about giving it to a guy twice because uh uh uh Stefansky got it.

SPEAKER_03

Stefansky won it twice. Yeah. And then he's gotten fired. He got fired last year and he's in Atlanta now. Maybe he wins again, dude.

SPEAKER_02

You never know.

SPEAKER_03

Maybe he gets his third one.

SPEAKER_02

If Atlanta wins 12 or 13 games, he might. I will be crowing if that happens. Yeah, I don't know why you're all over Atlanta. Oh, you kind of terrible.

SPEAKER_03

That became a thing. I I kind of agree, but I'm gonna I'm gonna ride them anyways. Ride them, Dork. Ride those dirty birds. Okay.

SPEAKER_04

Here we go again. Dork Alex.

SPEAKER_03

We'll be back next week talking about.

SPEAKER_02

I got some week one bets I've already made, Dork. Week one? Yeah. Uh I I wasn't gonna do that because it was so far out and shit. Oh, heck. But I watched a few shows and people were talking up trash. Uh and I figured I've already made all my futures bets. I might as well back the teams that I bet the futures on in week one.

SPEAKER_03

Heck yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So I got the Titans at minus three and a half against the Jets.

SPEAKER_03

Is that uh No, it's it's gotta be plus three.

SPEAKER_02

Uh the Jets couldn't be favored against anybody.

SPEAKER_03

Titans minus three, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, uh yeah, Titans minus three, it is in Tennessee. Okay. I got the Vikings on the money line uh at minus one oh eight versus Green Bay.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

I've got Dallas minus two and a half at minus one oh five versus the giant my giants. Your giants?

SPEAKER_04

Hey, uh, this is business, and this man has taken it very, very personal. It's not personal, Sonny. It's strictly business. This is business, Dork.

SPEAKER_02

And I've got uh who are the Vikings playing week one? I I wrote Tennessee, but that can't be that's not fucking right.

SPEAKER_03

What do you got there?

SPEAKER_02

Uh uh Oh, uh the Vikings are playing who are they playing Money Line Dallas.

SPEAKER_03

Is that like week two or uh I don't know what that's like or is that a parlay?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, it's a parlay! Thanks, Dor. Uh yeah, I've got I've got Tennessee at minus three plus. Get your shit more organized there, dude. I'm sorry, man. Uh I got Tennessee minus three uh versus the Jets. I got the Vikings on the money line.

SPEAKER_00

I think they're playing Green Bay.

SPEAKER_03

And to your aunt, you texted me, no, I did not bet on the White Sox. I wish I had. What a fool! You said you were going to be every year. They're leaving the division now. They got a guy who's an all-star this year, Tristan Peters. Yeah. Who's uh alumni of the Savannah Bananas, if you've heard of him.

SPEAKER_02

Oh yeah, I've seen him on TV. Uh I I can't believe you didn't bet the White Sox. Uh uh even Fez was touting them before the season started to go over their win total.

SPEAKER_03

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Uh yeah. Oh man, I thought you were on that because when you said, Yeah, I'm getting I'm gonna throw down on that, and you and you that's right.

SPEAKER_03

I just I just missed it.

SPEAKER_02

I forget now.

SPEAKER_03

I really don't follow baseball that much.

SPEAKER_02

I don't either, but you gotta do it when you think about it.

SPEAKER_03

You gotta do it. You gotta jump when the iron's hot.

SPEAKER_02

That's what uh uh it's called strike when the iron's hot.

SPEAKER_03

Strike, yeah. Um next week, we're gonna be back. We're gonna talk quarterbacks. Yep. Fantasy's coming. Fantasy's coming, and uh, that's what we're gonna be all about. Uh thanks for joining. Um football's football is near. Yeah, it is. Have no fear.

SPEAKER_02

All right. Well, thanks for watching Fantasy Football at the Dorkin, the dude. We'll see you next week.