Ready Set Coach Podcast

Managing Client Expectations in the Coaching Industry

• Emily Merrell and Lexie Smith • Season 2 • Episode 90

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This week’s episode discusses managing client expectations in the coaching industry. Em and Lex discuss how to help set and manage expectations with potential and active clients from the sales call through the end of a coaching engagement. 


Here’s what you’ll learn: 

  • Tools that Em and Lex use while they are working with clients to help set expectations
  • Why it’s important to set expectations early on in the coach-client relationship 
  • Meeting your clients where they are and operating with a solution-driven mindset
  • Your role as a coach
  • The importance of boundaries as a coach
  • How Em and Lex have set boundaries for themselves to maintain being able to show up for your clients
  • How setting expectations at the get-go can help your clients appreciate and value your time together, coaching more 
  • And more! 



Listener Links: 



Emily Merrell  

Hey Lexie Smith.


Lexie Smith  

Hi, Emily Merrill.


Emily Merrell  

I was thinking we should just have her like weekly catch UPS just be the podcast.


Lexie Smith  

Seriously, we so you guys, we have two times blocked off a week. We have an app. We got one hour Tuesdays. And then we have an hour, 90 minutes on Thursdays holy English is hard. Okay. But our Tuesdays, I don't think we actually get to work what it's 940 right now. So we just spent 40 minutes just basically in a co therapy session catching up on life. And now we have 20 minutes of work. Yeah,


Emily Merrell  

business therapy, maybe I don't know, I don't know, if we have any solutions that come out in this podcast of how we could actually do better or getting the therapy out of the way earlier. But everything's so fresh when we meet each other. And I feel like we don't have anyone else to talk to about these things. So it's like


Lexie Smith  

there Yeah, and I do think it's, it's needed. And at least I'll speak for myself. It's, it is therapeutic in the best way. Like I think I'm, I'm able to work better post these sessions that we have with each other. We do try to call each other when we can to, on our way to yoga class. Yeah.


Emily Merrell  

Talk to you more than I talked to my husband. True story. Well, so you'll appreciate this. So listeners, when Lexi was visiting me, I forced her to do like one of my favorite workout classes, which is not core power. I have a second favorite, which is called bodied. And maybe


Lexie Smith  

maybe I'm interjecting now, when you say bodied, it's not a shot. It's a chug


Emily Merrell  

squat, you just want but basically like a step aerobics class, with such a high vibe energy, like if you are in a shitty mood, it's hard to maintain this shitty mood in this class, because everyone is just so lovely and so positive and like so woo powered. But it's also one of those classes where you kind of have to pay attention or you are going to look like a hot mess Express. So today, I was doing really well. And then I was like, Oh, I'm doing really well. And then I wasn't doing really well. It's like once you start realizing your brain was drifting, or your brain is drifting, or if it recognizes, like, I look good, like I've got the steps down and then I was like, I don't have the steps down. It is one of those classes where you have to like focus. And so as my brain is like trying to mull over some things that I was processing this morning, I noticed that I will get out of flow. And I feel like I forced Lexie to do it too. So she knows what I'm talking about. But I think that kind of is I'm going to tell you what to up for the segue for today's topic.


Lexie Smith  

Well first I had one more quick squirrel because it's gonna like double that something my experience with bodied was we walked in the instructor was so welcoming like greeted us Emily newer, like the whole experience of the class. It felt like part of the community. Now fast forward to this year is my I mean, like my yoga Pilates era, meaning it's like a hot it's IHP so Inferno hot Pilates, and I freaking love the workout. It is so intense. I go a lot. In fact, I'm probably approaching my 50th class. I should you should


Emily Merrell  

become a member now. Are you a member yet? Oh, yeah.


Lexie Smith  

I'm on live. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I've been paying the monies because you got over that hump. I am. But the one problem I have with the studio and I if I have a listener from that class, ironic. Hi, I'm in hot yoga with you. I've been going since January. And I still don't think they know my name. Even though I try to make my way like try to make myself known. I try to ask questions. I don't really feel welcomed. I love the instructors. I have like kind of mini girl crushes on them. But I feel like this weirdo. You know who they don't know. And then they do know everyone else. I'm like, how do they know everyone else? Like why does everyone else like I'm here all the time? I check in I like ask questions. And I feel like I had an expectation based on what I did, from bodied and I thought that would be carried over when I started this. So


Emily Merrell  

yeah, one more scroll because I was very, very well done. Today, guys. It's my birthday on Friday. And I walked in today and they're like, they had pride flags up and they had a little sign that said Happy Birthday, Emily. And I was like, Oh my God, they are so frickin thoughtful. It because they give you like little handwritten cards that are bedazzled when it's like your fifth class or your 10th class or your 50th class and they like shout it out. So I get in and I'm like waiting to be shouted in class. It was another girl's birthday


Lexie Smith  

another Emily named Emily. And I was like, Oh, I will technically set your birthday till Friday. So go Friday


Emily Merrell  

talk but I was like that was what I told the owner who I'm friends with and she's like, Oh, happy birthday but like it Was that for you? I believe so. But I got really excited. And I like revved it up. But yes, yes.


Lexie Smith  

Okay, so segways are squirrels into the topic today is managing client expectations as a coach. And we're going to be approaching this from a variety of angles, because there's a few different lanes that you need to manage expectations in. So Emily, Will you kick us off with Lane one?


Emily Merrell  

Lane one, the slow lane. So one of the things this is this was prompted by a recent slack I got from a client, a coaching client, who was like, hey, you know, we're approaching our fourth session, am I? Am I where I am supposed to be? Like, according to all of the other students that you've had students or other clients that you've had, like, Am I making enough progress? Am I doing it right? Pretty much. And it was such an interesting reflective question, even for myself. Because expectations, my expectation as a coach is to deliver them to their transformation. And that could take the first session, or that could take 12 sessions. And there are the people who get it. And we layer on it after the first session. And there are people that need eight sessions to figure out where they are going, and what is up and what is down. So I think Lane one is like managing expectations that there is no one size fit fits all journey, like while I offer the same container, the experience can be interpreted differently per person. Yeah,


Lexie Smith  

and I actually think this is transferable across more than just coaching. You know, it's something I experienced a lot in my PR agency, you know, the expectation of when someone will see results, take it back to coaching, no matter what type of coach you are, whether you're a career coach, a PR coach, a business coach, a health coach, you know, people want to know, when will I see results? When, when when that's like the big question, right? How quick how, how quick, what Emily just underscored are highlighted is that's pretty hard to, to nail on the head. And so when we talk about managing expectations, it's something that I actually think you should do, from your very first sales call the very first time this this topic gets approached, when they ask that question indirectly or directly, like, what does this process look like? Let's take health care, Jean, when am I going to drop 90 pounds, a way to manage I don't know why I picked 90 pounds. Like five years. I think, you know, setting the precedent of, you know, this is what I have seen in my experience. However, everyone's journey is unique. And there's going to be a lot of different factors that determine your success. Health especially is an extra complicated one, because I'm sure there's genetics at play, etc. But if if someone is only eating healthy, one day, the week, and working out for 20 minutes verse, The Girl Next Door, who's working out seven days a week, and again, not a health coach, guys, you know, eating well transformative Lee, I can imagine a different timeline of results. So it's your job upfront, to tell them that to prepare that to set that expectation. It's also something to EMS point, you'll likely need to reassure or remind them of threw out the coaching process.


Emily Merrell  

I have two things to say on that one. This is not very different than our workout classes that we've referenced before. We're both of us have seen results. But then like our own diets, our own can be our own enemies at times where we're like, we could be further along if we didn't drink or didn't eat pizza on Fridays and Saturdays and Sundays. So it's tacos on Tuesdays. And I think one of the one of my favorite tools that I've I think we both have used and in Lexie, I think you were quite good at this is while you were working with a client, it is sprinkling in those acknowledgments. So like, Hey, I know that you were working a full time job as you were building your side hustle, I want to acknowledge the work and the energy and focus that you were putting for yourself and giving them those little like pep reminders. So they when they are starting to flounder if they are feeling like they are behind schedule, or they aren't where they should be. They get like that dose of dopamine 100%


Lexie Smith  

I'd also say meeting moments where they're feeling down or they're feeling discouraged with a solution based mindset. So encourage them but come up with a solution. So let's say when you first kick off coaching, you know, the first goal you set is let's get your business launched in 90 days. Maybe that's your first goal. And then life happens in And you know, they have to take three weeks off here or their job picks up here, etc. Acknowledge that and then go into solution mode. Okay, so what do we need to do to reset and hit this goal, right? Turn it into motivation to reset and re motivate your client.


Emily Merrell  

Amen. I love that. And I think what you do to LAX with PR coaching is such a great example to have, you could be delivering this, it's like, I feel like your program is a lot more programmatic programmatic, like,


Lexie Smith  

it's more, it's once upon a time. Yeah, the G version, oh, gee


Emily Merrell  

version, but they were getting the same thing, like delivered at the same time that the next client would be getting. And so like client number one, could be sending it out and doing their own press and like, raking in the features. And client number two, who is a coffee cup maker might not have the same success as a monthly calendar creator. Those are the two things, you know,


Lexie Smith  

you're like, what's on my desk? Yeah,


Emily Merrell  

I'm like, what, what, what is accurate?


Lexie Smith  

Yeah, it's it's so true. And you know what the reality is, too. And this is frustrating. But this is life. You can even have clients, we're doing all the right things. It just hasn't happened for them yet. You know, that's why there's such a small percentage of business owners that first off even make it past year one, let alone make it past their first six figures, I read a stat on LinkedIn the other day that I think less than 2% make it to seven figures. There's reasons for this. So even if your client is doing all the things you're talking about, let's let's go to Career Coach, when they're, you know, doing all the reflections, they're doing all the resumes, there is a component of timing in life and circumstance where it just might not be the right time. So that's where in my opinion, your job as a coach is to really be their support system, and help uplift them and remind them to stay course be their accountability buddy in this journey and, and remind them that they're doing the right things. And to stay course. Yeah,


Emily Merrell  

I think that's such a great, great recommendation. When thinking about managing expectations, and being their accountability, buddy, and like, getting them through it. It's like running a race. Like I think, I don't know why my workout metaphors are coming forward right now. But like, there is a moment with coaching, I feel like I've seen it no matter if they are getting the wins, where like the self doubt comes in where the like, should I be doing this comes in, like it's up, up up, and then kind of like plateaus for a second and then up again, like there's there's like a mountainous terrain. And so I think there's something about, you know, we have the capacity, typically with one on one to really be that true leader, as you said, but and then group like, Do you have any suggestions on how you keep the momentum going? And the expectations of like, where they are when they're at different stages.


Lexie Smith  

Okay, so let me break us, let's take a step back. Because I think something else that sets you up to be able to manage that is managing the process a little bit more, and maybe gene, a client's expectations of how they're going to interact with you. Okay, so we'll bring it full circle in a minute. But first and foremost, you know, this kind of coincides with boundaries, right, but from day dot, managing their expectations of what your container looks like, is it one on one? Is it group? If it's group, you know, is there a component of one on one? When are you available to speak to them? What are the format's of your calls? Like? What is the cadence? Like, if you know you have a chat, are you going to respond to them in an hour or 24 hours? Setting, you're going to set both you and your client or clients up for success if you manage those expectations, right off the bat. So with that said, back to your question of managing kind of a one on one client, which there's one situation you're managing versus a group. Oh, man, there's so many factors at play now. I think it's, I think it's kind of the same conversation that we had, but at scale. So presenting upfront, even to your group, like, look, there's a group of, you know, 10, beautifully, unique individuals in this room. Some of you may have your epiphanies. This week. Some of you may have your epiphanies three months from now. And that's okay. While we're going through this together as a group, you still have your own independent journey. I'm going to start there, and I'm going to toss it back to you.


Emily Merrell  

Yeah, no, I think that's a really good point. And it's been fascinating in terms of both group and one on one where we'll have people and you leave and you're like, oh my god, did they get what what I thought they would get out of it. And you're not sure and you're like, hoping that you gave you gave them your 110% and, gosh, I've had we've both had So we've had clients who are so resistant to things that are like, no, no, I'm never going to do whatever fill in the blank, and then get we get these messages. Like two weeks later, two months later, a year later, I have a client that just came back to me. And like, I've given her so much homework, so much one on one support. And then she's like, Oh, I finally like, did got to at all and did it all. And here's the results that I got. And so it's kind of like you're holding your breath. And then you unless you are told that they are getting x, y and z, you don't know. And so I find that really fun and terrifying. But like when you hear from someone months later being like, I finally did that collaboration, or I finally got on flow desk or I finally whatever whatever our recommendation was, your routine was at the time.


Lexie Smith  

I think something too, that's important is throughout the coaching process. While yes, you're supporting them within the container, you need to also be preparing them to, to be able to self support beyond your time together. So you know, something that we we did in the ReadySet group program, and its initial format was a good portion of every single group session was mindset based, right? We addressed what are you going to do in those moments where you feel low, and you're not sitting in a room of 10 women who are going to lift you up? What are you going to do when imposter syndrome? How do you combat that? How do you reframe what are the tools you have at your disposal? So I think also managing expectations is helping teach them how to self manage their own expectations. Yeah,


Emily Merrell  

I think that's a, that's a great reminder, like giving them the tools that like we shared the tools in our toolbox, so they can also practice with them. I love I this is kind of the same, but different. But I was gonna say like, coaching is is fascinating y'all, because it's not therapy. And you all know it's not therapy. But coaching also can bring up a lot of emotion for certain people. And I think Lexie, and I can name at least 10 times 10 instances that someone has cried on one of our calls. And so not only we've collectively we've hosted group, so it's managing and making that making sure that person is held and has seen, while also managing the space, and the container of together people. So it's like we want we see you, we love you. But we also have to be respectful of the time. And the money that other people have have paid and what their expectations are of, of getting out of their session with us. So I think that's just a just a more of an idea or a reminder of like obstacles and things that might pop up in your coaching practice. Absolutely.


Lexie Smith  

And you know, we kind of I've mentioned this a couple times throughout this episode, but I want to reiterate the importance of managing expectations starts from your first interaction on the sales call. It's reinforced from onboarding, and then it's reinforced on your first call, it's reinforced in your first week, if you start responding to them right away, all the time, borderline breaking your own boundaries. And by the way I have so been I've done this, raise your hands if you're setting an expectation that your boundaries or the expectations you set don't carry much weight. So part of managing expectations is keeping them right set them then keep them and it can be hard. And of course there's moments where you can let your humanity you know, go the five extra minutes fine. If it's one on one, it's easier if it's group like you need to respect the group entirety you know, a way to do that is Hey, guys, like, you know, we're gonna stay on for 10 minutes due to such and such if you want to leave now I totally respect that right? So never forgetting that you're that you're catering to a larger group. But again, really like if you're hearing this and you're you're at a point where you haven't started a new engagement challenge yourself. Just start it from day dot now Emily, here's the here's the challenge question. I'm gonna ask you what if you're hearing this in your mid working with the client, and you didn't set the foundations? Is there a way to rebound?


Emily Merrell  

Definitely, I think it's, it's in your next session. It's really important and if you especially if this is something you desire to do, you can reset the container and this has happened many times for us at least in group, but even one on one you're like Just a friendly reminder. If you have any questions for me, the best place the best place to get them or like the the place I will be answering them is on Slack. Note that I will be responding within 24 hours, 48 hours, 72 hours, whatever your hour rate. Time Frame is and then you can also you can kind of reset it you don't have to point fingers you don't have to blame things. I think it can get a little cloudy and you are friends with your clients. And you might get like a text message or a voice note or something that comes through. And you're like, how do I? How do I reset this? And so I think when you make more of like a general announcement to people versus initially, or just like, calling out one person, it feels it feels better, to me at least.


Lexie Smith  

Yeah. And if anyone is listening to this podcast, you knows Emily, you know, like, a lot of her clients are her friends, I have a little bit more. Let me let me rephrase this. I love my clients. It's not that they're not my friends, but I just don't. That's not what I mean. But like, I don't have, you know, like, they don't have my cell phone number, for example. That's something I've been intentional with at this point in my career. But something I will say, when I do reset boundaries, you know, could be a client that had been has been with me for six months. So really, there's a deep bond, even if I've created some boundary is reminding them why it's beneficial to them. Why is this, this boundary or the expectation beneficial to them? Because, for example, you know, this actually happened in the agency recently, but I think it's completely transferable. I had a client spreading me thin on all hours of the day, like five different platforms. And I had to say, look, in order for me to be the best at my job, and stay organized, and to perform to you in the way that you know, our contract dictates, like, I need to make some shifts. So like, help me help you essentially, right. And I think yeah, coaching, same, like I have these boundaries in place, so I can maintain my cup, and my brain and my clarity, so I can show up when we aren't together and deliver at full capacity.


Emily Merrell  

Yeah, I think that's such an incredible and probably like, scary, scary boundary to reinforce especially at an organization that big, but you were so good. And I think when you have boundaries as a coach, and we've had a whole podcast on this, I think your clients also value your time that much more in value the work that you give to them. All right, so with that, what's the homework Lex?


Lexie Smith  

The


Emily Merrell  

summer break Summer, summer school, right


Lexie Smith  

brain, your homework, I would say, you know, this is actually something we do. It's in the ReadySet. Coach launch pack. When we have our boundaries module, what are the things that our homework does is we have them audit for boundaries, their whole process, and that starts again at discovering sales. So take a look at your materials, anything you have templated take a look at the language you're using. Take a look at if you have an onboarding package and make sure you are very clearly setting expectations right away. If not, adjust, adjust,


Emily Merrell  

adjust, adjust. And with that, we will see you the next time. Ready Set Oh