Dads Unfiltered

"Choosing Home: Navigating the Best States to Raise a Family"

January 23, 2024 Season 2 Episode 29
"Choosing Home: Navigating the Best States to Raise a Family"
Dads Unfiltered
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Dads Unfiltered
"Choosing Home: Navigating the Best States to Raise a Family"
Jan 23, 2024 Season 2 Episode 29

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SummaryThe hosts discuss the best and worst states to raise a family based on factors such as education, healthcare, and family well-being. They explore the top five best states, including Massachusetts, North Dakota, Minnesota, New Jersey, and Connecticut. They also discuss the top five worst states, including Mississippi, Louisiana, Alabama, West Virginia, and New Mexico. The hosts highlight the challenges and opportunities in different states and emphasize the importance of considering factors such as services for special needs children. They also discuss the role of the state and federal government in providing support and resources for families. The conversation explores various aspects of government services, spending, and support for citizens. It also delves into the need for improving infrastructure and education, as well as the purpose of education. The discussion highlights the importance of considering different perspectives and values when evaluating the effectiveness of state rankings.

Cited a wallethub.com article titled the best and worst states to live(2024) to access the article click here

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SummaryThe hosts discuss the best and worst states to raise a family based on factors such as education, healthcare, and family well-being. They explore the top five best states, including Massachusetts, North Dakota, Minnesota, New Jersey, and Connecticut. They also discuss the top five worst states, including Mississippi, Louisiana, Alabama, West Virginia, and New Mexico. The hosts highlight the challenges and opportunities in different states and emphasize the importance of considering factors such as services for special needs children. They also discuss the role of the state and federal government in providing support and resources for families. The conversation explores various aspects of government services, spending, and support for citizens. It also delves into the need for improving infrastructure and education, as well as the purpose of education. The discussion highlights the importance of considering different perspectives and values when evaluating the effectiveness of state rankings.

Cited a wallethub.com article titled the best and worst states to live(2024) to access the article click here

Tick Tok @dadsunfiltered
Facebook Dads Unfiltered
Email 2dadsunfiltered@gmail.com
YouTube https://youtube.com/@DadsUnfiltered

Chris's emotion coaching 
Tick Tok @dadding_daily
Instagram @chrisoneilcoach
YouTube  @crisoneil

Support the Show.

Pete (00:01.603)
Welcome back my unfiltered friends to another episode of Dad's Unfiltered. I'm Pete and with me, way out amongst the stars in Los Angeles, is Chris.

Chris O'Neil (00:12.246)
Just call me a Star Wars opening crawl.

Pete (00:17.627)
We hope that you guys all enjoyed last week's episode from Cradle to Congress. In the next few episodes, we're going to carry on that conversation. We're going to explore the different areas around locally as well as globally and hopefully talk about things that we can do to make changes in the future for the next generations of moms, dads, and children.

Chris O'Neil (00:22.355)
We do.

Chris O'Neil (00:42.774)
That's right. That is right. So today we have an interesting topic lined up. We're diving into the best and worst states to raise a family. So buckle up fellas. It's going to get wrecked.

Pete (00:58.716)
That's right man, it is. We found a compelling article on wallethub.com that's titled the best and worst story states to raise a family in 2024. Now this got us thinking about what makes a state ideal for raising kids.

Chris O'Neil (01:17.354)
And these are, yeah, obviously these are very important things that, quite honestly, I didn't think about when I moved to a different state. But then again, I was like 15 years away from being a dad. So it's sometimes shit you don't think about until it's happening. But the article-

Pete (01:33.435)
Nope, yeah, because you were young and single.

Chris O'Neil (01:36.426)
Well, right. And it just, it didn't occur to me to look for shit that I might need when I'm a parent. Which is not surprising. I mean, you don't know what you don't know. And obviously a lot has changed. Right, right. Obviously a lot has changed since I was in my mid-20s. But the article takes into account certain various factors, from education and health care to affordability and general family fun.

Pete (01:48.059)
Yeah, hindsight is 2020.

Chris O'Neil (02:06.846)
So let's see. Yeah. Let's kick things off with the top five states to raise a family. So we're going positive and then negative. So first, this surprised me quite honestly, not because I had all the information and I thought I was wrong, but because I didn't have all the information and this is where I'm from. So top of the list is Massachusetts.

Pete (02:30.682)
No. This is where I'm from. On top of the list is Massachusetts.

Chris O'Neil (02:35.986)
So Wallet Hub ranked Massachusetts as the top state considering factors such as education quality, safety, and family fun opportunities. The state's commitment to education and health resources played a significant role. So when I lived in Massachusetts, I was under my parents' insurance. I was still a young man and a kid. So I didn't really get into all the adult stuff until I got out to Los Angeles.

Pete (02:37.907)
So law and health rank Massachusetts has the top state, considering fact, procedures, education, polling, safety, and family voting. States are committed to education and health resources. That's the way it is. So I lived in Massachusetts. I was one of the parents of the service. And you can't really get into all the important stuff. Right. So.

Chris O'Neil (03:05.493)
I had never gotten into that in Massachusetts.

Pete (03:09.231)
See, and I'm still out here. I will say that there is a lot of good. And I know that our services are good. They are still a pain in the ass to get. They make you jump through hoops like a fucking circus seal, man. It is terrible. The shit that you have to do just to get it, but it is good once you get it.

Chris O'Neil (03:18.434)
Hmm.

Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (03:31.566)
Okay, well that's something. I think it's kind of like last week when we were talking about how Britain is better than the US but not as good as a lot of places in Europe. So it's kind of like the stepping stone, like it's better but it's not amazing.

Pete (03:33.563)
You know, that's the thing.

Pete (03:46.233)
Right.

Pete (03:52.141)
Pretty much.

Chris O'Neil (03:52.89)
Uh, yeah, so that's number one. Number two is North Dakota. So known for its beautiful scenery in national parks, North Dakota secured the second spot offering the lowest average annual rent relative to income. Third most affordable housing overall. And it ranks first when it comes to prevalence of child care workers. And it has, uh. Oh, lowest. Sorry, I missed.

It has the lowest annual cost for child care. That's interesting.

Pete (04:26.879)
You know what else is interesting about North Dakota that I failed to mention in this little thing that I wrote is that they actually have the highest marriage like retention I guess that they don't split up.

Chris O'Neil (04:33.204)
Oh, please.

Chris O'Neil (04:40.898)
Mmm. Yeah, that's interesting.

Pete (04:43.987)
the highest success rate. Probably because it's cold and lonely in North Dakota and probably sucky. So...

Chris O'Neil (04:54.805)
So, yeah, grab your loved one and cuddle up because there's not much else to do.

Pete (05:00.315)
Yeah, but it's still good that they are second. I mean, that's amazing. You would never think of a state like North Dakota to rank that high for some reason.

Chris O'Neil (05:09.773)
Well, yeah.

What is that technically? Like, where are the lines of the Midwest? Because I never remember what exact states like, you know, the general ones that are in the exact middle. But like, where does it stop on both sides? You know what I mean? That that would it be called the Midwest? Because I thought

Pete (05:22.705)
Yeah.

Pete (05:29.628)
I think that's probably about where the line's drawn, because after that it's like Montana, and that is the West.

Chris O'Neil (05:35.166)
Well, right. Well, that that's what I was. I didn't know if it was like past the mountains or before the mountains. Who knows? I'll have to look that up for myself on the cusp. All right. No. Number three. Number three is Minnesota, the land of a thousand lakes, as everyone knows. That's what I meant. Shut up. Um, I my brain cut off one of the zeros. What can I say? I'm sorry.

Pete (05:44.015)
We'll say that they're on the cusp.

Pete (05:48.359)
Yeah

Pete (05:56.787)
10,000 lakes buddy, 10,000.

Chris O'Neil (06:04.93)
the land of 10,000 lakes. It's ranked third with strong showings in healthcare, education, and community. And the state's emphasis on well-rounded family life is what stood out. So, again, that's near the Great Lakes. You know, it would probably be on the opposing side of the Midwest, the east side of the edge of the Midwest.

Pete (06:06.297)
I hear you.

Pete (06:21.339)
Yeah?

Chris O'Neil (06:35.79)
And yeah, I don't think I've actually ever been to that part of the country. I've driven through it, but I've never actually visited.

Pete (06:43.497)
I've driven through Minnesota for certain. My ex got a speeding ticket in Minnesota. I had to drive the rest of the way out of state into Wisconsin.

Chris O'Neil (06:51.722)
and now has it. I was going to say, does she have an unpaid ticket and a warrant in Minnesota that you're just never going to go back to the state?

Pete (07:00.751)
I don't know. It's not under my name. I'm free and clear. Um, but yeah. It was the weirdest fucking thing. That's the only thing I really remember. That- oh! And uh, I destroyed a Burger King bathroom. Hahahaha! I thought that they would chasing us down. Yeah. It was bad. I remember specifically! I remember specifically running out of the Burger King like I had just robbed a bank.

Chris O'Neil (07:04.5)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (07:14.082)
Uhhhhhhhhh, hahahaha!

Chris O'Neil (07:18.485)
They thought they were being pulled over for stealing a can of tuna.

Pete (07:28.083)
I was like, go, go! Don't look back! That's how bad it was. Anyway, I'm probably not allowed in this state just because of that. Yeah. It was terrible.

Chris O'Neil (07:35.258)
Oh, that's just horrible. What, did the toilet not flush or something? See that reminds me that reminds me of And I'm totally forgetting his name, but a British comic telling a story about how he went He took a shit in a restaurant bathroom, and he tried to flush it like multiple times, and it just wouldn't go down so

And he was in, he was in some Spanish speaking country that he didn't speak Spanish. And he goes out and he's trying to like mime to this, you know, Maeder D like, Hey, come into the bathroom with me because there's a problem. And he just, he finally convinces him and he walks into the bathroom and he goes, look, presents the toilet and then flushes the toilet and it goes down.

Pete (07:58.671)
Yeah.

Pete (08:13.412)
And he just...

Pete (08:21.166)
and then flushes the toilet and it goes down. Yeah, yeah.

Chris O'Neil (08:24.294)
So he's just joking, like laughing his ass off about the fact that I entice this Mater Deed to come into the bathroom to watch my poop go down the toilet.

Pete (08:34.091)
Yeah, yeah, no, I didn't do that. I just ran like I had committed a crime Like the building was on fire. I was a fuck out of there, man

Chris O'Neil (08:37.63)
Yeah, well, yeah, that'll happen too.

Chris O'Neil (08:45.55)
Oh god, okay. I think this one surprised me also. Number four is New Jersey. So

Pete (08:56.543)
Right? And what a segue, right, from talking about my poop into New Jersey? Like, couldn't have summed that up any better.

Chris O'Neil (09:03.551)
That was totally unplanned. Very, very good. Geez. That's how we do it here at Daz Unfilled. Despite its reputation for high living costs, New Jersey snagged the fourth position due to its excellent education system and overall family well-being. So. Obviously, I've never lived in New Jersey, so I don't. I've only ever driven through that before. Oh, sure.

Pete (09:26.631)
But we've all seen... Oh yeah, with the windows up. But we've all seen Jersey Shore. So you gotta think, how good could their education be? But then Kevin Smith has come from Jersey. Bruce Springsteen, Thomas fucking Edison. Well, he wasn't from there, but like his plant was there.

Chris O'Neil (09:29.686)
We've seen... Yes!

Chris O'Neil (09:37.045)
Oh, God.

Chris O'Neil (09:43.189)
Yeah, well.

Well that's the other thing though, Thomas Edison was around when New Jersey wasn't modern New Jersey, right?

Pete (09:53.376)
Eh, no, not really.

But anyway, I mean.

Chris O'Neil (09:59.16)
Yeah, anyway. Yeah. Sorry for anyone we know in New Jersey. But you got, you got good, you got it. You're in the top five for raising kids. So good on you. And number five, coming in at number five is another New England state. Connecticut, if you don't know how to say it.

Pete (10:06.008)
I don't think I know anyone. My cousin.

Pete (10:11.517)
Yep.

Chris O'Neil (10:25.106)
or Connecticut if you do. Rounding up the top five is Connecticut. Excelling in safety and health and its proximity to cultural and recreational activities also play a big role. So that is good to know and I actually I have been to Connecticut many times. I have relatives in Connecticut. And overall it's

Pete (10:29.343)
I'm gonna go to bed.

Chris O'Neil (10:50.258)
a pretty well-funded state as I recall every obviously there's plenty of you know as it everywhere there's rich and poor people but Connecticut's one of those if you don't know it's like Florida light but you go to Connecticut to live when you have money you go to Florida live when you when you're just retired at least that's my experience.

Pete (11:02.303)
Connecticut's one of those things you don't know. It's like Florida lights. But you go to Connecticut to live when you have one.

Pete (11:15.508)
Hmm.

There's a mansion in Connecticut that Christopher Lloyd would spend his summits. I believe he grew up in a mansion down in Connecticut. Yeah, I can't remember the name of it But if any of you guys know feel free to let us know and I'll look it up and put it in the comments But yeah, there's a mansion that he grew up in out in Connecticut Yeah

Chris O'Neil (11:26.186)
Really? Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (11:40.058)
That's interesting. I will say the other piece of trivia is, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe Connecticut is the second smallest state next to Rhode Island in the country.

Pete (11:55.131)
I don't know. I was always told that size didn't matter. So there's that.

Chris O'Neil (12:02.148)
well if you're interested fellows you can uh... you can look that up and posted on the on the page of the episode as well feel free i give you fun things to do it's what i do

Pete (12:14.183)
So those are some good choices as far as where to look. I mean, a lot of them, let's be honest, are fucking cold. Like right now in Massachusetts, it's only 24 degrees. Minnesota, I don't even want to know, but I'm sure it's like ball shrinking right up into your stomach. Yeah. They're replacing your eyeballs like, fuck this shit.

Chris O'Neil (12:21.815)
That is true.

Chris O'Neil (12:29.76)
Oh, dude.

Yes, seriously, I think the warmest state in that list is New Jersey, which is not all that warm.

Pete (12:41.327)
No, not at all, but well, yeah. Now, I would like to add to the list now, I'm sure there were others out there later like me that have a special needs kid. The states that ranked for the top on that for services for special needs, Colorado was at the top for services for special needs children. Then followed quilosly by Massachusetts.

Chris O'Neil (12:42.156)
That's interesting.

Chris O'Neil (12:55.642)
Mmm

Chris O'Neil (13:08.023)
Hmm.

Pete (13:11.195)
Which again, like I said, once you jump through all their fucking hoops and cut through their red tape, the services really are great out here. And then following up is another shocker in fucking New Jersey. They're good with the special needs. Again, judging by what I've seen on Jersey Shore, there might be a lot of them out there. I don't know.

Chris O'Neil (13:11.986)
Oh, yeah.

Chris O'Neil (13:26.695)
Hahaha

Hey, take the wins.

Chris O'Neil (13:34.43)
Not so much. Well, that was it was a while ago. Jersey Shore came out. Are they on Jersey Shore like season 25 now, though, or some bullshit? Because I don't pay attention to that. OK. Yeah, that was good riddance.

Pete (13:42.323)
So now you know.

No, they're done. It hasn't been on in years.

Pete (13:53.383)
So now we know it's equally important to be aware of the states that might not be the best fit for families. So the five worst are Mississippi. Unfortunately, they ranked at the bottom due to lower scores in education, health and overall family well-being.

Chris O'Neil (14:19.39)
That's a bummer.

Pete (14:20.747)
Um, another state is Louisiana. They have challenges in healthcare, uh, their education. Uh, they also secured its place among the least favorable states for families. Um, and they have a lot of high crime. I know that like

Chris O'Neil (14:41.184)
Yeah.

Pete (14:43.991)
New Orleans is a high crime area and... But the...

Chris O'Neil (14:44.418)
What?

Yeah, I was gonna say too, even.

Chris O'Neil (14:51.938)
just having head... ..fucking delay. Sorry kids, the delay is killing us. But yeah, like it's, and obviously it's right in the path of a lot of hurricanes and tropical storms and all that stuff. So it just exacerbates all of those issues, I'm sure.

Pete (14:52.239)
The economics play a big, big role. Yeah.

Pete (15:14.747)
Yeah, I don't think they've ever fully recovered from Katrina, truthfully. Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (15:18.206)
Yeah. Once again, it's a place, including Mississippi, it's a place I've just driven through. I stopped to just get a look at New Orleans when I was moving out here, actually. But I didn't get out and do anything. I just kind of drove through. I was like, oh yeah, there it is. So once again, not a lot of actual experience in these states.

Pete (15:32.647)
Yeah.

Pete (15:43.607)
Yeah, right. I've seen them on the Travel Channel and some shows on the Food Network. I hear they got good beignets. Coming up next on the list is Alabama. Again, they have education struggles and lower family incomes.

Chris O'Neil (15:47.555)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (15:53.486)
Oh yes.

Pete (16:05.859)
are what helped contribute to Alabama's position in the lower rankings. It's that whole economic depression. It's weird how there's so few things for the one precious commodity that each state would have, each country would have. It's the one thing that gets you through. It's not gold or fucking expensive jewels. Yeah, it's the next generation.

Chris O'Neil (16:29.09)
Kids.

Pete (16:35.503)
You know, it's sad.

Chris O'Neil (16:35.766)
Well, and obviously we don't have a ton of extra detail about why in the, you know, and obviously that could be an expansion of a different conversation. But obviously the vast majority of these are southern states. So what is it about the southern philosophy, the southern mentality that keeps these states on this, you know, worst list basically?

Pete (17:03.271)
Road to Ruin.

Chris O'Neil (17:05.182)
Yeah, and it's what values are, you know, and let's be honest, the vast majority of the southern states tend to be more on the conservative side of the political spectrum. So and conservatives are traditionally constantly touting family values and benefits there. And what the fuck, you know? So it's just definitely a conversation worth evolving and expanding on.

Pete (17:29.67)
Yeah.

Pete (17:36.339)
Yeah, if any of you guys that are listening are teachers or you live in those states, please reach out to us. Let us know. Share your experiences with us. You can reach us out on Facebook, email, whatever you need to do.

Chris O'Neil (17:44.998)
Oh, absolutely. That's yeah. Uh, yeah. Got it.

Chris O'Neil (17:55.274)
anything and everything and we'd love to and we'd love to interview some dads who are in these states and what your experiences are so including in the in the previous list so if any of you fellas listening live in any of these states and you want to come on and talk about this stuff just let us know we're happy to have you on

Pete (18:19.256)
Next on our list is West Virginia. So we're moving up the coast away from the southeast to the mid-Atlantic, I guess. So, yeah, despite having natural beauty, West Virginia has faced its challenges in various factors, including their health care and the economic stability. I mean, they got, it's basically mining.

Chris O'Neil (18:29.573)
Hmm

Chris O'Neil (18:33.066)
Yes, I suppose.

Pete (18:48.203)
And lately that hasn't been very great, very profitable, and it's caused a lot of havoc. I think they have like a whole town that they can't even drive through or live in because of the mining. I think they based some fucking horror movie on it too. I think that was in West Virginia. Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (18:53.448)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (18:56.786)
Yeah, I know what.

Chris O'Neil (19:06.214)
shit Well, and that is a factor for sure and I now that you bring that up that obviously is Prevalent in a lot of southern states as well So, you know who knows which state specifically that is majorly affecting but that certainly has to be acknowledged as much as people tend to be hanging on to That stuff like we're a mining town. We're proud of it and we're you know, and the tradition there I think is important. Of course like with any

pride in your tradition type thing. But it's also one of those where it's like, okay, but having pride in having pride in what kept your town together is different than being proud of having jobs that kill you. You know, like, we're coming up with better ways to do things, we're coming up with different ways to do things. And

Pete (19:59.7)
you know.

Chris O'Neil (20:05.43)
This is one of those like, obviously, this is a more recent example. But like when Uber and Lyft came out and the cab industry just took a nose dive because it was such a such a change and such a positive difference that people were like, holy shit, because cabs, taxi cabs had the monopoly on the livery system, right? You just you have private cars and taxi cabs. That was it.

Pete (20:06.388)
And this is one of those like, obviously.

Pete (20:20.94)
Yeah.

Pete (20:34.641)
Yep.

Chris O'Neil (20:35.47)
So in this in this situation, we're definitely moving away from a lot of coal mining and other I honestly don't know what other mining would be in West Virginia, but just the fact that things are changing in that way. And it's difficult to just up end an entire industry that supported many, many towns.

Pete (20:37.749)
So in this situation.

Pete (20:51.108)
Right.

Pete (21:01.327)
industry that supported the main intents. Right.

Chris O'Neil (21:03.07)
So I understand the frustration there, but at the same time, I think that's something that's really important to get right with what to transition to, you know, instead of trying to like teeth and claw your way back to that, just because that's what you're used to.

Pete (21:20.731)
Right. Well, you know, I mean, a lot of these places, one of the things that they can do is build up the infrastructure as far as not just like roads and things like that, but their online capabilities, because people now are able to work remotely and wherever the fuck they want. And if you have the ability and the systems in place where people could do that, it might attract more people, which would then increase.

Chris O'Neil (21:39.022)
True.

Pete (21:49.119)
more revenue for the state and then in turn they could fund more education things. Another good idea for these depressed states would be to legalize fucking cannabis and charge the tits out of it in taxes like every other state does and now they all have surpluses for education and things.

Chris O'Neil (22:07.755)
Mm. Surplus, yeah.

Pete (22:12.243)
But no, not weed. Fuck that.

Chris O'Neil (22:12.286)
Yeah, and that and I know and I think honestly, I think in a lot of the like more conservative traditional states pride plays a big part in what they're willing to do. Because it's like, oh, no, we're not. We don't care what it does to affect, you know, such and such. We refuse to do this thing because of the laden, you know, deeply in beliefs. And I'm not knocking people's I'm not knocking people's beliefs because

You know, they're the foundation of all of our realities. So, what?

Pete (22:46.779)
Yeah, but sometimes you just need to change and you need to grow and adapt.

Chris O'Neil (22:51.93)
Oh, I agree. I'm not saying that there aren't detriments to certain beliefs. I'm saying believe what you want. I'm not telling you not to. But also, also look at those things called facts and, you know, the ability to benefit your town, your county, your state. Those are important things.

Pete (23:01.599)
Hahaha

Pete (23:17.469)
Yeah.

So I guess we'll just go to the last state, rounding out the bottom five, is everybody's favorite, New Mexico.

Chris O'Neil (23:26.093)
Yeah

Chris O'Neil (23:29.961)
Yes. Noom Exiko.

Pete (23:30.999)
And truthfully, they have all the same problems uh, facing difficulties in education and family health, but I mean look at the geographic area, you know, it's just not I don't know I mean they tested the fucking nuclear bomb there for Christ's sakes, they have Area 51, it's Roswell, it's all like desert and I just, I don't see

I don't know, everything that I've ever seen of New Mexico has never been really like overdeveloped. Like not a lot of things there. You know what I'm saying? Like I don't know. I could see it being low on the list but then again I could also see it being low on the list as to like why the fuck would I want to live there? You know? Like

Chris O'Neil (24:08.875)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (24:19.842)
Well, yeah, and it's, don't they have one of the most I think it's worse than Arizona, like the border issues there, whatever your philosophy on issues at the Mexican border, there tend to be I don't know if there are more crossings there, for whatever reason.

I just know that I have heard more about the challenges and the controversy over the Mexican border to the US in New Mexico than any other place. Like even worse than Texas. And there's a lot of obvious challenges and political back and forths about the border crossings in Texas. But to my knowledge, I believe that's the most challenging.

Even just... I don't know, that would be a guess. Because I know there's a lot of older people that live in New Mexico who were mentioning that before, right? So it's...

Pete (25:24.763)
Right. Well that's the other thing too, yeah.

that warm dry climate that old people fucking thrive in.

Chris O'Neil (25:29.847)
People.

Chris O'Neil (25:34.26)
A lot more people setting their ways and not wanting, you know, not wanting certain changes.

Pete (25:42.584)
So we've covered both good and bad. Now just while you were rambling on there buddy, I went and I looked. Your state is ranked 27th best for families. So what are your opinions so far as a young parent as to California and their programs and services?

Chris O'Neil (25:48.126)
Yeah, as I do.

Chris O'Neil (25:55.529)
Okay.

Chris O'Neil (26:03.574)
California.

Chris O'Neil (26:07.974)
Um

ironically enough given you know it's one of the most uh... progressive states in the country uh... and obviously this there's a ton of uh... liberals here but what most people realize is the so many people focus on southern california there are so many conservatives california they just mostly live north you know uh... further north

So and it's huge as a huge state. And for anyone, especially on the East Coast, it's like it's stretching from Massachusetts, like down to maybe not as far as Georgia, but it's a it's almost the entire width of the west side of the country. So or length. But what are we doing? Height? I don't know. I don't know how it works.

Pete (27:02.431)
I don't know. Why are we talking about the size of the state? How are the services for you, motherfucker? Ha ha ha. You're so fixated on size. What, did they should tell you it was small? Ha ha ha.

Chris O'Neil (27:08.736)
No, I was preempting it there.

uh... shut up i don't have no we're not going to talk about that the we're not going to talk about that uh... no um... it's been

Pete (27:18.623)
Fair enough.

Chris O'Neil (27:27.466)
one week since you looked at me sir uh there have definitely been challenges and certain services um are better than others in the sense of like um we were we were with the kaiser uh medical group for a while where everything's in house and everything's on the same computer system and

Pete (27:34.483)
Okay.

Chris O'Neil (27:53.846)
The problem is there's certain things that you either don't have access to or, um, you know, you got to jump through a bunch of hoops, but because it's all consolidated, you just, no matter where you're going in that system, people have your information. Whereas like with a PPO that we're currently in now, um, because we switched insurance when, um, my wife got her new job. And this is supposed to be the best insurance money can buy given

Pete (28:05.693)
Right.

Chris O'Neil (28:24.01)
where her company is. We have that we have paid more out of pocket on this insurance plan than anything else we've ever done this year. And that's the part in like, there's always just some excuse as to why it's happening. Oh, well, you know, you have

Pete (28:37.066)
Right.

Chris O'Neil (28:45.75)
You have to pay this amount first and then we'll cover you. It's like, okay, well, we paid that amount. Well, no, cause you did that as an individual because you're a family, you know, you have to do it as a family and you haven't reached that amount yet, so you gotta keep paying out of pocket. And like every time, you know, we're like, hey, how about now? They're like, no, cause this, this and this. Like, this just always seems to be something else we have to pay for. So, and like, and childcare. I will say,

through the public school system they have some after-school programs uh... and we have one that uh... my daughters in school ls best it's basically after they get out of school they can go to this program from anywhere from

Chris O'Neil (29:37.982)
up to I think four or five hours. But you can take them out whenever you know, but it's basically there because you know, school gets out at like 230 here. And if you're working full time, you can't pick your kid up then so you got to have some sort of program. So in that sense, in my experience of that program is good. Charlie really likes it. She enjoys being there, she gets to spend more time with her friends.

Pete (29:42.319)
Yeah.

Pete (29:51.537)
Right.

in that sense.

in my experience in that program.

Pete (30:03.96)
Okay.

Chris O'Neil (30:06.394)
So in that sense, in that sense, it's really good. The part that's not so good is that it's like, I think they, they were able to take like 20 kids per class or, or something, or, or maybe per. Not necessarily, but this is definitely more than 20 kids in the, in the, in the program, but it's, it's a first come first serve thing, and they only have so many resources. So that was the big issue is yeah, there's the desire for it to be there.

Pete (30:08.961)
So in that sense, it's really good. The part that's not so good is that it's, I think that you're gonna.

Pete (30:19.462)
Right.

Pete (30:27.34)
Yes.

Right, yep, like most states.

Chris O'Neil (30:36.662)
But the other fact, like I'm actually a member of the, um, the school site committee, the, the parent, um, I'm the, um, the vice chairman of the, um, the school site committee. So I've been in a decent amount of meetings now with regard to like funding and you know, how the whole program works out here. And there's a ton of desire. There's a ton of, of interest, but again,

like the red tape of the funding tends to be the biggest hurdle because there's so many, there's so much bureaucracy that was just never changed. So there's a lot of hoop jumping that's unnecessary and everyone agrees it's unnecessary, but no one changes it. And we actually just recently had a meeting with the, uh, the superintendent of the schools. Um, and it, it does look like he's putting in some solid effort to make some changes, which is good.

Pete (31:11.889)
Yep.

Pete (31:17.92)
Mm-hmm.

Pete (31:24.095)
We actually just.

Chris O'Neil (31:36.09)
uh... i obviously don't know the ins and outs of uh... benefits for kids outside of los angeles possess in my experience but uh... medically it's difficult because of everything outside of the kaiser system is basically a la carte uh... and you know pay a buttload out of pocket before you're covered even for the best insurance which is bullshit

Pete (31:46.344)
Yeah.

Pete (32:05.662)
Right?

Chris O'Neil (32:07.076)
and

Chris O'Neil (32:11.783)
But yeah, but the school system in general, we do have a decent amount of charter and magnet schools out here. And normally those are privatized and you have to pay for them, which obviously sucks because it's like, it's the standard of well, if you don't have money, then you're fucked. But there are actually a decent amount of charter and magnet schools out here that are publicly funded. So

Pete (32:16.82)
We do not.

Pete (32:30.803)
Right.

Chris O'Neil (32:38.27)
as long as you get in, you like yourself to go through the school lottery system. As long as you get in, it's like public school in the sense that you can, you can go for free and then you pay for like additional stuff. Like if you want a paid afterschool program, you know, then there's that. Um, so it's definitely not the best, especially given what we've been talking about with regard to school and programs and things like that. I don't have special needs kids, so I haven't dug into that. Um,

Pete (32:43.471)
Yep.

Pete (32:55.921)
Right.

It's definitely not bad.

Chris O'Neil (33:08.63)
But in my daughter's school, there is a dedicated special needs class that they have some great teachers and people are encouraged to go there instead of to a separate special school type of thing, you know. So I appreciate the integration and the just, you know, the acknowledgement of we're all people and let's just do what we do what we can for each person.

Pete (33:17.585)
Yep.

Pete (33:25.831)
Yeah.

Pete (33:37.607)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (33:38.25)
So in that sense, I would say there's more of a positive desire here for it to be better than it is, while still jumping through hoops, red tape, and a lot of bureaucracy.

Pete (33:40.127)
In that sense, I would say there's more...

Pete (33:51.751)
Fair enough. You know, and I think a lot of our country's issues could be resolved if it was all blanketed by the federal government. Like you see in a lot of other countries, it's not left up to the individual towns and shit to decide what to do with its citizens. It's the whole country takes part.

Chris O'Neil (34:20.319)
Yeah.

Pete (34:20.347)
It's not every man for himself. It's funny, the way that America acts, it's like they want all of the stuff, but then they're like that Fleetwood Mac song where, well, there you go again, you say you want your freedom. Like, you know, we want your help, but no, fuck you, you know, at the same time. So it's weird. It doesn't make any sense to me how that all goes.

Chris O'Neil (34:35.206)
Yeah, yeah.

Chris O'Neil (34:43.002)
ERI!

Chris O'Neil (34:46.11)
Well, and I do. I do see the value in this for sure with regard to the size of the country, first of all. Right. Because I think, I think the issue comes when, when the politics get involved, like the idea of, Hey, we are a big enough collective of people as a state that we can take care of a lot of stuff in house. But when it comes to

or, you know, issues that are maybe a little bigger than we can handle, then yes, have the federal government step in. I like and appreciate the separation of those two things because of the size of the country. Like, France is the size of Texas. Like, so any country like that is basically working as a state would work. We just happen to have a much bigger country with many more states. So it's more of a...

Pete (35:44.776)
Thanks.

Chris O'Neil (35:47.446)
it's I don't think it's any real differences just it would be like if Europe was one country and each of the countries were states. So in that sense, I think it's a good thing. But just like capitalism, right? Like, when we switched over to focusing on profits for the board in the 70s, that's when it became

Pete (35:51.128)
Thanks for watching!

Pete (35:59.103)
In that sense, I think it's a great thing, but just like capitalism, right? Like, when we switched over to focusing on profits from the war in the 70s, that's when it became a much shittier system. Everyone's still arguing capitalism is the best system we've ever had. Yeah, but it's corrupting. So, like, the way that it was before versus the way it is now after the 70s.

Chris O'Neil (36:12.39)
a much shittier system and everyone's still arguing capitalism is the best system we've ever had. Yeah, but it's corrupt now. So, like the way that it was before, versus the way it is now after this after the 70s. That's a totally different thing, even though it's been called the same thing. So the titles the same, but how we go about it has changed. So I think the big issues between state and federal have

those same reasons, you know, it's, it's politics, it's greed, it's all the worst stuff. And mismanagement and you know, shit like that. I mean, you know, again, talking about New Orleans and going back to Katrina and stuff like, that was just it was mismanagement. I'm not saying I could do better. I'm just acknowledging that's what it was. Right. So I

Pete (36:47.226)
Right.

Pete (36:52.327)
all the worst stuff and mismanagement. Shit like that. I don't get it.

Pete (37:08.461)
Hmm.

Chris O'Neil (37:10.59)
Yeah, I think a lot of this stuff.

Pete (37:12.627)
I think a lot of this stuff.

Chris O'Neil (37:15.3)
is just in flux right now because of where we are as a country.

Pete (37:21.739)
I truthfully think that a lot of these things should be offered by the federal government. A lot of services and things. Because no matter where we live, no matter what fucking state you're in, you're still a member of the country. And again, we are still the resource that makes this country quote unquote great. It should be the people, not the shit that it produces, but the fuckholes that bring about the shit.

Chris O'Neil (37:35.423)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (37:45.439)
Oh yeah!

Chris O'Neil (37:48.97)
But then again, you know, and it's the problem I have with government, because I wouldn't call myself, I wouldn't call myself a conservative. I wouldn't call myself a Republican. But I also, given the current definitions, wouldn't necessarily call myself a Democrat or a liberal either. But it's the thing I know about government is there's no. There's no cap to spending because it's not their money.

So it's like, well, who cares? Oh, we lost a hundred billion dollars. And I don't know what you're going to do. Right. There's no incentive to not spend money or to not lose money. There are so many fucking programs that are so old that have not been revitalized. They've just been put on a shelf somewhere and they're still being funded, but nothing's coming from it. Right. So it's like, I still remember from the movie, Dave, uh, where, uh, Charles Groban was Dave's friend, right. And he was,

Pete (38:23.455)
There's no incentive to not spend money or to not use money. There are so many fucking programs that are so old that have not been revitalized. They've just been put on the shelf somewhere, and they're still being funded. But nothing's coming from them, right? So it's like, I still remember from the movie Dave, uh, or Charles, where Dave's friend was writing this.

Chris O'Neil (38:48.53)
uh... dave for those of you don't remember that movie he basically is a double for the president as a side gig to make money and the president has a heart attack in the they tap him to take his place so the country can still run uh... and he'd been vices friend to go over the budget because he doesn't know he's doing his friends a financial is and he's like he reads through the budget is like i don't know david fire in my company this way i'd be bankrupt

Pete (38:54.343)
He basically is a double for the president. He has the side gate to make money. And the president has a card in his hand. And he tapped him to take his plus, so the country gets that one. And he invites his friend to go over the budget, because he doesn't know what he's doing. His friend's a financial person. And he's like, he reads through the budget. He's like, I don't know, Dave, if I ran my company this way, I'd be bankrupt. You know? And I think a big part of that issue.

Chris O'Neil (39:18.706)
I think a big part of that issue with letting the federal government do everything is it would take longer. What? You just mean the education system?

Pete (39:26.32)
I didn't say everything.

Pete (39:32.503)
No man, they should be helping their citizens, man. Insurance should be fucking socialized, it should be fucking not the way that it is. It should, and they should be offering all sorts of support. Like when we were fucking hit with COVID and shit, we got paid dick, other countries that barely have a pot to piss in were giving their fucking people more money to survive than fucking our federal government was.

Chris O'Neil (39:41.35)
Okay, that stuff I agree with, yes.

Chris O'Neil (39:57.816)
Hmm.

Pete (39:57.979)
Meanwhile, the guy that we were having run in our fucking country was drinking Windex and telling people it's alright. What the fuck? We really shi- when we're behind the 8-ball. Our roads, our fucking infrastructure sucks, our education system sucks, our leaders are fucking retarded. And I don't even like using that word, but it's fucking true. There is no other word to sum up those old out-of-touch dipshits that are running our country.

Chris O'Neil (40:03.114)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (40:24.434)
it's the it's the legitimate definition of that word to retard something to slow it down that is the federal government absolutely no and i think that maybe i just kind of misunderstood what you're saying because that part of it i agree with any uh... basic need to live thing housing uh... education

Pete (40:32.701)
And they are.

Chris O'Neil (40:52.894)
I mean, granted, it's not need to live, but like, that's a basic, a basic thing. Uh, water, housing, food, education, those things should not be profit, uh, profitized. Like being in the private sector and, oh, well, you know, we'll just, it'll be, uh, you know, competition and then, you know, we can change the prices of things and it'll be fair. Yeah. Not if three companies own everything.

And it just seems like they're different companies because they're different names, but they all have the same fucking parent company. So it's just turning into a monopoly anyway. So yeah, in that sense, I totally agree with like the pharmaceutical company, you know, the big business, like big tobacco, all of that stuff. I mean, it goes back to what we said in previous episodes, the lobbyists, the lobbyists are the, the kind of negative fodder.

Pete (41:23.024)
Right.

Pete (41:31.254)
Yeah.

Pete (41:40.307)
Thanks for watching!

Pete (41:46.16)
Thanks for watching!

Chris O'Neil (41:50.646)
that's continually fucking up the country.

Pete (41:55.671)
Yeah, no, but they should be providing better fucking support for families. They should be helping fund programs in states for definitely for trades. They should be done more schooling for trades and such because the whole higher education thing has kind of gotten a little bit out of fucking control. And, and the way that America kind of focuses on that need for that kind of education and that

It's a little stressful. A lot of fucking other countries think that it's almost borderline child abuse the way that we are and the way that we fixate so much on education. I wish I had read that fucking weeks ago before I flipped out on camera. You know.

Chris O'Neil (42:31.507)
Mm.

Well, yeah, and the-

Chris O'Neil (42:38.934)
Well, yeah, no, and I hear you and we all we all get sucked into it at one point or another. And it's like, why are we actually doing this? What is what is the point of well, and when you when it comes right down to it, it's we've said this before, too. It's going back to creating workers. That's what the foundation of our country's education system is to create workers. It's not to build business.

It's not to increase GDP. I mean, technically it is, but it's like, Hey, how can we create the most mindless, willing to follow the rules people who just shut up and do what we ask them to do? Oh, well let's send them to school in America. Cause that's yeah. And that, that is probably the biggest factor that I'm concerned with about my children going to school out here is making sure. And that was our biggest hesitation with the public school system because it's.

that is the federally mandated, you know, curriculum. So it, and I, I want to be sure that that's correct. Is it, is it the federally mandated curriculum or is it state mandated? Either way, it is mandated by a government. Like it has to be this way, but it's not been evolved since it was created for the purpose of creating workers. You know what I mean? So in that sense, yeah.

Pete (43:45.117)
Yeah.

Pete (44:03.816)
Yeah.

Chris O'Neil (44:06.161)
there definitely needs to be some major change.

Pete (44:10.291)
For sure, for sure. And it all starts with just one step. So get out there and vote, make the change.

Chris O'Neil (44:19.401)
And there you have it dads.

Pete (44:20.795)
Not to sound like one big fucking political ad, because that's all we're seeing right now on TV.

Chris O'Neil (44:25.102)
I know. Yeah. Well, and that, you know, and obviously we do our best to keep it light here, but occasionally, you know, we, we also want to get into topics that matter to us and, and that we feel are worthy of conversation. And, and, uh, I think it's good that we can have these grounded, serious conversations about this stuff while still then enjoying, you know, light conversation about movie reviews and things like that. So

um you know i think it's important people want to talk about what matters to them you know and have i like the idea of not having it mutually exclusive like let's laugh and have fun and talk about you know pop culture but then let's do something completely different and talk all serious about you know the state of the country and those two things can be intertwined and that's certainly part of our goal here

Pete (45:19.736)
to be in compliance.

Chris O'Neil (45:27.07)
So there you have it dads. And whether you're planning to move or just curious about how your state stacks up, it's always fascinating to explore these rankings and watch how they change too, potentially.

Pete (45:31.813)
Yep.

Pete (45:41.183)
That's right. But you gotta remember, these are all just one perspective. I mean, we pulled it from one article. But from what I saw, that one article has been referenced in a lot of national newscasts. So it's pretty much, I think what everyone's using is their rule of thumb for this ranking.

Chris O'Neil (45:59.589)
Mm.

Chris O'Neil (46:07.499)
Hmm.

Pete (46:08.539)
But again, it is just one perspective. Everybody has a different story. Everybody has a different experience. And that is all in how you perceive it, how you take it, how it works for you. But.

Chris O'Neil (46:24.93)
All right, and as you were saying, how the states do it differently, there's the bonus with regard to what works best for your family. Right? So, you may have different values than we do, and all of those other things might be good for you. But, so, it is what it is.

Pete (46:36.947)
Mm-hmm.

Pete (46:49.048)
I hear you knocking, so why don't you say the last part?

Chris O'Neil (46:51.406)
Yeah, yeah. All right, well, thank you again. Someone is. Thank you again for joining us on another episode of Dad's Unfiltered. And until next time, fellas, keep dading unapologetically.

Pete (46:55.271)
Someone's trying to tap out Morse code.

Chris O'Neil (47:14.706)
I know I'm gonna do that. Hehehehe.

Pete (47:21.107)
We'll see you next week, guys.


Introduction
Exploring the Best and Worst States to Raise a Family
Top 5 Best States to Raise a Family
Top 5 Worst States to Raise a Family
Considerations for Choosing a State
Challenges in Certain States
California's Services and Programs
Desire for Improvement in Education and Programs
State vs Federal Government
Government Services and Spending
Support for Citizens
Improving Infrastructure and Education
The Purpose of Education
Different Perspectives and Values