Navigating Adult ADHD: Embracing Relief and Grief in My Journey

In this episode of The Doctor Coach School™ Podcast, I’m continuing the conversation about my recent ADHD diagnosis, but through a different lens.

After last week’s episode, someone in my community sent me a powerful question:

“What was upsetting about receiving the ADHD diagnosis?”

It was such an insightful question. Because while there was immense relief in finally understanding my brain… there was also deep grief.

This episode is about both.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• Why my ADHD diagnosis brought both validation and sadness
• What it felt like to know exactly what to do — but not be able to do it
• The neurochemical reality behind task paralysis (dopamine + norepinephrine)
• The years I spent believing I was lazy, broken, or deficient
• The grief of missed opportunities and unfinished projects
• The research study I believed could have moved the needle in medical education — but never published
• Taking nearly all the coursework for an MPH… twice… and never completing the capstone
• How structure and external deadlines masked my symptoms during training
• What changed once I became an attending and had to self-direct everything
• Why ADHD is often misunderstood (and why the name itself is misleading)
• How relief and grief can coexist in the same body at the same time

Key Takeaways

• An ADHD diagnosis can bring validation and sadness simultaneously.
• Executive dysfunction is not laziness — it’s neurological.
• High achievement does not disprove ADHD.
• External deadlines can temporarily compensate for dopamine deficits.
• Unfinished projects often reflect brain chemistry, not lack of intelligence.
• Grieving missed opportunities is part of healing.
• The ability to hold both positive and negative emotions at once is a leadership skill — and a life skill.

The Bigger Lesson

If there is one takeaway from this episode, it’s this:

You can hold relief and grief in the same body.
You can feel confidence and uncertainty at the same time.
You can be an expert — and still feel like you have no idea what you’re doing.

That emotional flexibility is the skill that:

• Helped me build a seven-figure company
• Helped me step away when I needed to
• Helped me return with more self-compassion

And it may be the skill that unlocks your next level, too.

If you have questions, DM me. I personally read and respond, and your question might become the next episode.

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