How do you measure wealth? If you ask most people, they’ll tell you that they measure it by what’s available in your bank account. However, I actually believe that you measure your wealth in time. Then, when you do that, you start to look at the dollars differently.
Here’s what I know, no matter how much money you have in your accounts, if you aren’t in control of your time, it is a poor existence because you’re beholden to someone or something else out of your control.
My guest today, Megan Sumrell, is going to be a must-listen as you’re trying to create your affluent life because there’s more in common than you think between time and money management: they’re both limited and a result of our behaviors and choices.
Megan, like most of us, reached a point in her life where she realized that trying to juggle multiple roles was not sustainable if she wanted to build a truly rich and fulfilling life. That’s when she decided to do things differently and found that a thriving life came from harmony, not from trying to find balance.
Get ready to be equipped to take control of your time so you can continue taking control of your future. When you start controlling these two resources of time and money and use them in the present to create movements and missions that align with your purpose, you will find that you’re living the richest life possible.
IN TODAY’S EPISODE WE DISCUSS…
CONNECT WITH MEGAN:
SUBMIT YOUR QUESTIONS FOR FUTURE EPISODES: www.askMelnow.com
TAKE THE FINANCIAL FREEDOM QUIZ
OTHER RESOURCES:
CONNECT WITH ME:
GET MY BOOK:
“The Entrepreneur's Solution The Modern Millionaire's Path to More Profit, Fans, & Freedom” - melabraham.com/book/
How do you measure wealth? If you ask most people, they’ll tell you that they measure it by what’s available in your bank account. However, I actually believe that you measure your wealth in time. Then, when you do that, you start to look at the dollars differently.
Here’s what I know, no matter how much money you have in your accounts, if you aren’t in control of your time, it is a poor existence because you’re beholden to someone or something else out of your control.
My guest today, Megan Sumrell, is going to be a must-listen as you’re trying to create your affluent life because there’s more in common than you think between time and money management: they’re both limited and a result of our behaviors and choices.
Megan, like most of us, reached a point in her life where she realized that trying to juggle multiple roles was not sustainable if she wanted to build a truly rich and fulfilling life. That’s when she decided to do things differently and found that a thriving life came from harmony, not from trying to find balance.
Get ready to be equipped to take control of your time so you can continue taking control of your future. When you start controlling these two resources of time and money and use them in the present to create movements and missions that align with your purpose, you will find that you’re living the richest life possible.
IN TODAY’S EPISODE WE DISCUSS…
CONNECT WITH MEGAN:
SUBMIT YOUR QUESTIONS FOR FUTURE EPISODES: www.askMelnow.com
TAKE THE FINANCIAL FREEDOM QUIZ
OTHER RESOURCES:
CONNECT WITH ME:
GET MY BOOK:
“The Entrepreneur's Solution The Modern Millionaire's Path to More Profit, Fans, & Freedom” - melabraham.com/book/
Hey there, welcome to this episode of the African entrepreneurs show, you've heard me talk about wealth is more about a behavior than it is about money. But you've also heard me say that one of the critical outcomes that we want for all of our followers, all of the community and the people we work with, is to live a richer lifestyle. And that restaurant lifestyle is how you experience life. And so here's the thing. Have you ever been in a situation where you feel like you don't control your time where you feel like, all of a sudden you're along for a ride, and everyone else is telling you what to do with your day and your time, and you get to the end of the day, but I don't know where it all went? I know I have. Well, in this episode, I'm talking to a dear friend, Megan Somerville, who is an expert in this area, and she came to it not because that's what she studied, she came to it. Because someone on a bench, looked at her and asked her the question, what do you do for fun, and she didn't have an answer. And we're gonna walk through all the parallels between creating time that works, and money that works. It is amazing, it is rich, and it is going to be the pathway to get in the driver's seat with your money, and your time, enjoy the episode, I can't wait to hear from you. This is the absolute Entrepreneur Show for entrepreneurs that one operate at a high level and achieve financial liberation. I'm your host, Mel Abraham, and I'll be sharing with you what it takes to create success beyond wealth. So you can have a richer, more fulfilling lifestyle. In this show, you'll learn how business and money intersect. So you can scale your business, scale your money, and scale your life, while creating a deeper impact and living with complete freedom. Because that's what it really means to be an absolute entrepreneur. Hey there, Megan, it's so good to have you on the affluent on first show. This is going to be fun.
Megan Sumrell:It is I've been excited for this.
Mel Abraham:I don't know, um, y'all didn't get get a chance to listen to the pre conversation. Sometimes the pre conversation is great. And when we get into it with Megan, you're going to hear some of the amazing stuff she does. But she's been drawing parallels to wealth and time. And I actually believe that you measure your wealth in time. And when you do that, then you start to look at the dollars differently and everything so but before we get into it, you know, Megan and I met, she came in as a client. And then we ended up having a conversation and she's in the master's program with us and everything. But in the conversation with Megan, she disclosed and we're going to dig into it kind of a journey. That was an epiphany and Aha, a way that she wants to live life differently. And I think when we talk about the affluent life, we're talking about how we experience life. And so before we jump into anything, Megan, would you do us a favor, and you know, the audience may not know who you are, and they should, and we'll make sure we have all the links, but just kind of a little bit of the backstory. How did you get here? Because you have a different kind of path. But it was an awakening? Yeah,
Megan Sumrell:yeah, it really was. So I was a, which I think brings funny to the planet. I was a math major in college. I love numbers I always have, but ended up landing. I kind of equate it to the briar rabbit a little bit ended up landing a job that I didn't even know existed that I loved, which was in the IT space in these kinds of software testing capacity. So I spent over 20 years in the corporate IT world we're really my role was to go into large scale software organizations that were chaotic. Most of them are especially with startups and really help them develop the right processes so that they can build their software better, faster, cheaper, loved what I did was great got married later in life started a family later in life. And you know found myself at that crossroads of juggling, you know being a new mom career home. And for a while kind of prided myself I like to use the analogy of I could sprint across a balance beam while juggling like 20 Balls without dropping any. And that may sound cool but it's really not sustainable. And one day kind of found myself it was a very pivotal moment for me and my journey I was going to be a Friday I wanted to be able to get off work a little early and go enjoy some time at the park with my daughter. So you know did what every quote high performing productive person does set the alarm extra early right got up Before 45, did all the things packed everything the night before and arrived at the park that Friday afternoon. And she managed to get to the swings helped get her set up there pushing on the swings. And a mom comes up next to me and push on her child. And at some point in the conversation, she very innocently just asked, What do you do for fun? And I didn't have an answer. It's hard for me to like fully remember that moment? Because it was a hard reality for me. Because I didn't even realize that I didn't have an answer. Because I just couldn't remember the last time I had done anything I would, I would think of as for fun for me, not that I had an unhappy life, right. I mean, I was at the park with my daughter, I loved that I had a great career and nice home, a family, all the things but I didn't really have anything that connected for me anymore was just like this robot motion every single day. And so long story short, that kind of launched me into a journey of saying, you know, the irony here, Megan is you have all the skills and over 20 years of training and certifications on how to look at something that is not very optimal, and how to restructure that. So I was like, let's do that. Take yourself on as a client, which is essentially what I did. So I threw away all of the productivity time management, I've done all the trainings and certifications. I said, Let's treat this as if you were walking into a software company, and really set out on a new path to how I look at and creating a new framework for planning and managing my time. And people started noticing I was different, I looked different. I acted different. And instead of hearing the UK, kind of questions, I started hearing, what do you do it? Like you look different to do exercise routine, or you're trying keto, whatever I was like, No, I'm actually I'm just having time for myself again. So couple people asked if I'd help them out. So I started showing them what I was doing. And then you know, finally hit the wall one day where I just said, this is my calling in life I feel is and I call it work life harmony, which I know you really resonate with. I'm just on a mission to shut down this work life balance myth, and introduce people to a new way of planning and managing their time that we really get to live a harmonious life instead of a balanced one.
Mel Abraham:Yeah, I love this. And I hope the viewers and listeners are here that the message because it's so easy for us, especially with the pace at which we live today. For us to get in a rhythm to get into a pattern and to just do and, and each day is just a repeat of the day before and the day before and the day before. And we do it. Because we're expected to either the expectations are from us internally, from our bosses, our parents, society, the profession, the standards, the all of that. And before we know it with find ourselves in our 60s and 70s looking back and go, I don't even remember the journey. And I think that's, you know, Bronnie Ware has that book, the regrets of seven Regrets of Dying, and one of them is one of the top regrets. She's a hospital sinners. Is them getting to those last days of their life and saying I couldn't live my life or someone else's? And I think that the message and I hope that people are hearing this, that we are in a time of uncertainty economically. I think we are at a time of uncertainty politically, globally on so many levels. And we can look at that as a rallying cry to dig in and continue on and persevere. Or we can look at it as a wonderous opportunity to say, What am I called to
Megan Sumrell:do? Yeah, like, Hang on. Let me take a step back. Yeah. Yeah.
Mel Abraham:And I think that's, that's the beauty of it. If we just slow down and have one of my favorite parts of the day. I mean, I get up like you got up that time. I'm usually up at 430. And between four and 430 You know, my wife gets up at like, 666 30 and she's like, why are you so loud in the morning? It's because I've had two hours of warm up. My favorite time is I go to the gym, but then I come back and I take Budo and we just go down on the beach and it's just him and I in the sunrising, the waves, the sounds, and for that moment, everything slows down. Everything becomes clear. I get to think I get to look at things. And I just I look at I say, you know, that moment in the park with your daughter, it was a slap, it was a smack it was a wake up, but it got you to just go, Oh, yeah. And I look at the gifts that you're bringing, because what you're doing for people, and this is the thing that, you know, why bring Megan on a show that is focused on money, wealth and riches. Because this is the key to rich, it truly is y'all, if you don't get that, that I can help you make all the money in the world, millionaires, billionaires, whatever it is. And if you can't control your time, you are living a poor life. And so what Megan does, and this is why it's so important, and I want to dig into some of the things that she does. Because when you have control of the moments of your life, that's when you start to live, the richness of life. richness is how we experience life. And I look at what you've done, how you shifted, and not only what you've done for yourself and your daughter and your family, but how you're doing it for other people, to allow them to access richness again, to experience life fully again, and I think this is an important thing to consider. So when you start to look at this, I'm sure it wasn't a shift that just happened like overnight.
Megan Sumrell:Oh, good grief now, because it's, uh, you know, just as I applied all of the, you know, 20 years of learning the principles and certifications, you know, for any software nerds out there listening all of the core principles that come with the Lean Six Sigma movement, you know, the the agile movements, even some of the, you know, the old school, Franklin Covey kind of things, right. But similar to how you approach teaching this financial independence, right? We aren't as a nation, we aren't taught financial management in high school and college really, unless you decide this is my career path, right? I'm going to go major in it. Well, we aren't taught time management practices and principles, either. And so then half of us or more than half of us are walking around thinking there's something wrong with me, or I'm stupid, because my bank account doesn't look like the way it wants, or I just can't seem to get organized, I can't seem to figure it out. I can't seem to get a plan. Well, it's not because there's something wrong with you. It's because we aren't teaching these skills out there. And then when you go into the planning community, which obviously I'm a part of, the solution, so many people are offering is, hey, buy this book, buy this physical planner, and it's going to fix your life. Well, that's like saying, buy QuickBooks or buy quicken and it's going to fix your life. No, it's not going to fix your life, if you don't know how to use it. You don't know the principles, and you don't create a system and a framework that you get to plug into daily, weekly and monthly. So that you know for me review it's you're controlling your finances. For me, it's you're controlling your calendar, because if you don't, everybody else is going to control it instead. So I spent a good three years really refining what is what I call my top framework today, which is time management, organization and productivity. And it really is getting all of the inputs created and structured in a way that works for you. And then what is the core framework are the repeatable weekly planning, monthly planning, quarterly planning and annual planning systems. So, you know, again, the parallels are just there. So right there with everything that you teach, the uniqueness for everyone is your inputs, right? So you get to bring your own inputs to the table, what are the realities of your life right now? What are your current commitments? What is your family life look like? What is already pulling from your time, kind of similar to you know, with the work I do with you? What's my budget? Like? What are my expenses? What are my needs versus might want? So we do the same thing with the time, what are your needs, we need to understand that and then what's left over, and then with what's left over, we've got to put some key prioritization processes in place that you're revisiting on the regular and then get the framework set up. So that you know, you start with a basic five step process. Then we move to the 10 step process. How do you create your plan each week that is in alignment with all of that and so This is why, you know, as I've been going through your program, I'm just like, I'm nodding it every step, I'm like, this is exactly what I'm doing with my time, why did I not see that these exact same principles because I mean, money time, same thing. They're, they're somewhat limited, right? We have to make choices. And part of those choices that I think people are missing both with the finances and the time, is we're always focused on the right now, like, where's this deal, you are going to stay in perpetual hell of like up, make my task list, try and get it all done, go to bed, wake up, pay my bills, try and get them paid off, go to bed. So with the same with time management, you've got a set like I know what my long term vision is, with my time. I know that three years from now, I want to only work three days a week, for four and a half hours a day. That's my time goal, just as I have a financial goal. So because I have those, I know how to back that up to say, what practices do I need to be putting in place today to help me meet that time goal, just as I'm putting the systems and machine in place today, to help me reach that financial goal.
Mel Abraham:This is so good. And it kind of hit me because I keep saying that. We've brought Industrial Age thinking to our money because we came from an assembly line mentality. And that assembly mind line mentality was we were going to dedicate our time we're going to put our trust in a company, we're going to work for 40 5060 years, we're going to get this pension, and they're going to take care of us for the rest of our life, which at that time, was a short period of time, we didn't last into the years that we did. And I started to look at it and go, and it's the same assembly line thinking that we're bringing to our time, because we're task driven. And if we're allowing the task to drive our calendar, versus the vision for a life that we want, we're gonna get our priorities all screwed up, whether it's money, or time, it's gonna be
Megan Sumrell:on on a hamster wheel, like it was never going to end it's always tell people, a task list is not a plan. If you are operating from a daily task list, you are going to stay in that health for forever, until you learn how to create a plan that is leading you towards a path of your desired output. And it's the same goes for whether it's a financial plan, or a time plan for yourself. But this you know, waking up and just making enough money to pay off the credit card or waking up and thinking of your task list and trying to check it all off. That you're just constantly stuck in the right here and now and you're never going to be able to move past that.
Mel Abraham:Yeah, so when someone comes to do some of this, because just like creating financial freedom, it's a journey. It's a path. Y'all should run the other way if I came to you, so I can do it in 24 hours. Okay, it just doesn't happen overnight. And the reason for it. One is, it is truly behavioral in the sense of how we show up each day. And now because of our conversation, I'm starting to see the parallels to because it's a belief system, which is set back it up, because the behaviors come from our thinking. And so I'm assuming someone comes to you, I come to you and I say I am frantic. I am working 10 hours, 12 hours a day, I don't see my wife, I don't see my dog, I don't get to the beach, you know, all those things. One of the what's the one of the first things that said?
Megan Sumrell:Yeah, the first thing I have everyone do, which is similar to the very first thing you have all of your clients do is we need to take an inventory of where your time is going today. So you know, people have heard the phrase time audit, but I bring a very different flavor to it. Because it's one thing to just go and like keep track of your time. And I like to use the analogy of the food log like you're for people that are trying to lose weight a lot of times so sit write down everything you eat. Well, if I have to write down everything I eat, I'm probably not going to behave the way I normally do. Right? I'm going to pass by the peanut m&ms run on all day, I would grab the fifth handful of peanut I can
Mel Abraham:vouch for it because I've gone through that, and I go if I eat it, I gotta write it down. I don't know the ingredients. So I'm like on. It's too complicated. I'm not getting
Megan Sumrell:it with finances. It's a little more black and white, right? So you can go back and pull up your bank statements or your credit card statements even see with time it's a little bit trickier. So I spend a lot of time with folks up front saying listen, we need to just keep our daily life with the understanding of the audit that we're doing is not to highlight what we're doing wrong. We need to put on our detective lens to say we're going to be looking for patterns. And then we're going to be looking for those large pockets of time, which almost everyone has, where at the end of the day, they're like, I was really busy, but I'm not really sure what I was doing. Because we all you know, until you get really good at this, we all we all have those. So I spend some time coaching people on, you know, here's why we're doing the time on it. And here's a very specific way to do it. So we're that we're getting the information that we have, so that then we know what changes need to be made, because they are going to be different for everybody. And in two of the biggest downfalls that people tend to see right away, usually, By day three, the emails start coming in. They're like, Oh, my gosh, I already like I had no idea, right? And a little gender bias here. But I mean, a lot of people I work with are women, and they've got kids, and they're juggling work and young kids. And when you were single dad, you know, that's not easy, right. And so one of the things we're looking to do right out of the gate is to minimize context switching. And it's different than multitasking. So multitasking, doing two things at once. And there are times when actually multitasking is great. Like I listen to audiobooks when I run, because my brain is only listening. So I'm not, I'm not going to say you can never multitask. There are times where it's really great as long as your brain is only focused on one thing. But it's the context switching that gets you and when I talk about that it's think about all the roles that you may serve, right? I mean, like for me, I'm a, I'm a business owner, I'm a mom, I'm a wife, I'm a daughter, I'm the chauffeur, I'm the meal planner, you know, all this stuff. If you are shifting from one of those roles in and out every five minutes all day long. That is the massive suck up productivity. So you're answering an email for a client, and then you're shifting over and answering a question to your child or your spouse, and you're coming back in because a team members calling and you're hopping on the phone. And if you're shifting into these different contexts all day long. This is why we feel like we never get ahead. And we're so dang exhausted by the end of the day. And most people have no insight into how often they're doing that.
Mel Abraham:Yeah, I imagine that. At the same time. It's got to raise their stress level and with or without the
Megan Sumrell:100%. Yeah, yeah. And you're always kind of edgy, or a little irritable. It's what causes you to wake up at three in the morning with the Oh, my God, and you start making the mental lists at 3am. Because you're so worried that you're forgetting about something. Yeah, because you never get to be fully present. And what I love to see people shift to and I had to go through this in my own life was, you know, I was just I hate the whole phrase of a side hustle, or the, you know, fit it in into your life. This is what's causing people to anytime they have 15 minutes, feeling like they need to jump in and do something that they think the outside world is going to deem as productive. And so Megan of 10 years ago, in the afternoons would have been kind of playing a game of Candyland, while kind of checking my emails while maybe heating up something on the stove right. Now, I work far less. I mean, my workday is basically from like 830 to one. And then I'm out. And from one to six o'clock, I'm not checking anything. Because I know from six to 620, I get to check back in again. But getting comfortable with being able to stepping away from something for several hours, and leaving that role behind and then coming back. It's a big belief shift. It's a mindset shift for people. But once you do it and you start experiencing the incredible increase in efficiencies and the decrease in stress, I get far more done in my days now than I did when I was working twice as much.
Mel Abraham:So it's reminds me of when I first became a single dad when when Jeremy came to live with me at five and a half, six years old. So I had an office and you know, the traditional CPA, you're in there at like eight o'clock and you're working till six, you know, but I got this kid, you know, not this kid this gift, I should say, you know, that is going to school, he's going to preschool he's you know, he's going to after school day care and everything and and it wasn't until I walked into the daycare center. One time I was trapped. I traveled a lot and spoke a lot. And so I came in the daycare center. It was kind of after school because I was leaving to the airport. And I wanted to say bye and The Absolute craziness that was going on there the noise, and all of that was just, and I looked at him. I said, Dude, I said, Is this the way it always is? The actresses? Yeah. I said, How are you getting your homework done? He says, Well, I tried to do they, are they helping you? Just sometimes. So I looked at him, I said, when this trip is done, you won't be back here again. And I had partners at the time, and I kind of said, Hey, y'all, two o'clock? I'm out. I'm done. What? You can't do that. I said, I can fire me they did just so for other reasons. But but the reality is, is that, that I thought that people would look at me and go, wait, I can't get a hold of you between two and four, and everything. But once I trained them to the point of saying no, to and for my time with my son, yeah, then I'll come back to you for an hour, hour and a half, then the evening is back with my son.
Megan Sumrell:And then what's amazing, and I'm sure you found this that hour, you come back. Like you can get caught back up on those three hours. You weren't there like that, because it's focused, you're not jumping in and out all the time, right? So when I let go finally, and just said, Hey, I'm kind of tap out at one 130. And then we'll circle back up with the team at six. I mean, we're gonna have five hours go by and in 20 minutes, and backup where I need to be and can shut down and I know I'm good to go till the next day. Whereas before, it was four and a half hours of me Trump being pulled in multiple directions. Incessantly is on rolling into the evening with nothing left to give. And that's, you know, again, it's just not sustainable.
Mel Abraham:You Yeah, you know, it brings to mind this, this thought of busyness isn't progress.
Megan Sumrell:Yeah. And I've actually got the front of my planner or the my bookmark in my planner says, busy is not productive. Yeah, just not Yeah.
Mel Abraham:It's so I don't know, you know, how often do we take the time we went, I remember when we bought our first this is ag me. bought our first fax machine. You know, back then it was like, $2,000
Megan Sumrell:I had a pager. I
Mel Abraham:had a pager. You know, I had the block phones, although Yeah. Oh, yeah. But what I think and this is the demon we wrestle with right now, is that there was a time where we didn't have email, we didn't have fax machines, we didn't have all these things. So if we needed something quickly, it would be a messenger that might take it or something. But by and large, it was snail mail. It wasn't immediate. But what happened
Megan Sumrell:were telegraph like telegraph. Yeah. telegrams, whatever. Yeah.
Mel Abraham:But we, we compress time, and expectations of time, because we'll just fax it to me. Now. It's emailed to me, Can you text it to me? Can you just upload it? And now all of a sudden, the space that we had to
Megan Sumrell:breathe? Yeah, it's gone. Gone.
Mel Abraham:It's gone unless we intentionally put it back. Yeah.
Megan Sumrell:And when I think about it, even like the relationship of the money to the time as well. This way with money, sometimes it can be a little bit easier. A lot of people, they don't want to look at the reality of the bills, right? Because they don't want to see that they're spending that their outcome is more than their income. And I know through your programs, when the first thing we do, like, what are the expenses? What is the income, like? First thing we got to do is fix that if it's out of whack. We'll similar with my approach with a time management. That's ultimately what that time audit is all about is when it comes to time, because it is just it's out there, right? We always think we have more than we do. And so one of the subtle nuances that I teach people when they're creating their plan for the week that I don't really see anyone else in the planning community doing is the first step is we plug in, what are your current commitments? Like? What are your expenses, right? What meetings have you already committed to what appointments? Do you have what's already blocked on your calendar? What most people do is they take that, then they write some ridiculous long task list. Think of it like a credit card, and then they wonder like, is this gonna happen, it's gonna get done, and then they can't figure out why it's not not getting done. Well, the second thing that I have people plug into their calendar is what I call recognizing your unavailable time, meaning those pockets of time in the day where you are awake, you are in motion, but you know that nothing on the important list of stuff that needs to get done is getting done. So for me from you know, I get up at 530 to six. From then until 830. I'm awake, I'm in motion things are happening. But nothing's getting done. I I'm making breakfast I'm going for time with a dog, I'm going for a run and packing lunches, your morning routine, all of that. My day doesn't really start till eight 830. But it would look like maybe it started at 530 or six, because that's what I'm getting up. And so when when I teach people how to start blocking that and creating visuals in their calendar for No, this time, is actually not time you're going to have available. And when I think about it with finances, it's kind of those annual things that creep up on you, right? The annuals, homeowners association dues, the things that aren't in your regular, they're not on your budget, per se. So we've got to bring these to light and get them into your calendar. So that when you're creating your plan for the week, you know what your real budget of time is, instead of constantly thinking, and usually for most people, they realize it's a third of what they thought it was. And they've been living a life thinking that they should be getting two thirds more done, than what was ever even possible for them.
Mel Abraham:So So here's an interesting question around that, because you start reformatting people's calendars, they're back to their lives, okay? And their time, which requires them to shift and change behavior, they see their days how they see their time. But it also requires them to do something different. And I know that when we talk about money, there's a tremendous amount of story guilt, even shame that come around. And when we all of a sudden say, Nope, this time is for me. No, this time is for us. And we didn't do this before. How do we help them navigate the potential pushback or guilt that they feel because they feel they're neglecting something they didn't neglect before? But in reality, they're giving to themselves?
Megan Sumrell:Yeah, so it's kind of a two fold process. One is walking people through understanding where they're being should in life, right? I should do this, I should do this. So as we go through all the stuff on their list that they've been trying to squeeze in, it is kind of that painful internal conversation of okay, this, why have I been spending time here? Is it because this is something important to me? Or is this because I'm doing it? Because I feel like I should. It's what, you know, I got guilted into by a family member or a loved one, what I saw on social media thinking I needed to live up to that, whatever the reason is, and there's kind of a series of questions that we can keep asking and asking to get to the real root of why is this even something I am trying to squeeze into the precious time that I have? Once we kind of get those buckets of No, really, this is something I want to be doing versus the huge chunk of shoulds that have come there. The next step is now going through an exercise of basically learning how to create boundaries. Because for most of us, like some people will say, Oh, you're either you're either a yes person or no person. For everyone that I work with, we're usually a combination of all of them. It just depends on which pocket of life we're talking about, right? There are things in my life that I am 100% of people pleaser on and I have to watch that. And then there are other sections in my life, where I'm the total, no person from a fear basis of afraid of like, what if I'm not good enough? What will someone think? Right? So it's walking through an understanding with each one of those, where does that fit? And then what are some boundaries that we can take a baby step on, we're not going to change it overnight. I just went through a whole annual planning exercise with with the women in my community and it was zeroing down what is one boundary, you're going to start with for the first quarter of next year, just one and then when the more you use it, then it just becomes a muscle. And then the more we exercise that muscle, eventually it just becomes a habit. But you know, this whole movement like that the whole Marie Kondo, like throw everything out and only bring it back if it brings you joy. That's great with physical stuff. But but let's be realistic, we can't go that extreme. Flip the switch, whether it's time or money, right. So it's how do we take those baby steps and start, how do we start pulling $50 a month out of our paycheck and putting it into that bank account right out of the gate before we grow that? And the same is true with the activities that we choose to spend. I realized that all stacks up Exactly. Yep. So
Mel Abraham:part of setting boundaries because I think this this may be important is to do Get Real around the expectations of others, and how to manage those with the expectations of self.
Megan Sumrell:Yeah. And one of the I know, I'm gonna butcher the quote, but it was a quote that Jensen cero had shared in her book on habits, she did a whole thing on boundaries that was so good. And she said, boundaries are a gift to everyone. And I love that mind shift change, because I think we think boundaries is going to set people off. But like, I have a friend who she is the master of her boundaries, and I appreciate it. Because if I call her, she will get on the phone and right away say, Hey, I've only got five minutes. Are you calling for catch up? Or do you have a question that I can help you with? She has very clear boundaries on no one's going to jump in. And I love that she does x if it's me calling to catch up. I'll be like, just wanted to catch up. Let me know when you have a minute. I'm not upset. Yeah, he's owned her boundaries, right. And so I think when we can see that putting those in place, and then getting the communication tool with others for it is really freeing for everybody.
Mel Abraham:There's a level of trust, I think that comes from it. It reminds me of a of a guy he used this metaphor on on stage one time I remember. And he said, if you have an aggressive dog, can you trust it? Or not? And most everyone said, No. He says, No, you're wrong. I can trust that it will be an aggressive dog. Its pattern of behavior is expected. It is consistent. And it is it is adhere to. So I can trust it's gonna bite me. So the idea of trust he was saying was, is the person's behavior consistent, predictable and open? And when it is, there's this level of trust doesn't mean you have to accept it or like it.
Megan Sumrell:If you know what to expect. Yeah, yeah.
Mel Abraham:And so you this friend, you know what to expect. And you actually respect it, not just expect it,
Megan Sumrell:which is Oh, and then when we are having time to just be together. We both know we're fully present there. If we're meeting for coffee, neither one of us has our phone out. Neither one of us is being distracted by something else. Because we both have very clear boundaries on our time. And so we're rewarded for that, that we can be fully together when we are and then I'm not, you know, she's not left annoyed with me because I called and she didn't have time. She's just very honest about that. And it really creates that honor. We're very honest. And if you run into people that that's not okay. Recognizing that something they need to grapple with, that is not then become your problem.
Mel Abraham:And I love I love that, that that is it is their issue, not yours.
Megan Sumrell:Yeah. Because it's your time if you do not control it. Everybody else will. They absolutely will. And so you need to have that conversation with yourself. Same with your finances. Do I want to be in the driver's seat of my finances? Hopefully, yes, do I want to be in the driver's seat of my time, and where it's going and how I'm spending it. And if you do, that means you're going to have to learn the systems and tools to do that. And then you're gonna have to practice it, you're gonna have to give yourself some grace on the journey to get there. But it is 100% achievable.
Mel Abraham:And I think that when you choose and actually make sure that you're on those parallel journeys of money, being in the driver's seat of money and time, what's on the other end of that, even if we don't create the exact picture of the life that we wanted, we at least know, like the old song goes, we have a lot closer we are we did it our way. We're doing it our way. We're on the journey. And I think that there's a bigger thing at play here. Because I think about how old your kids she's 12. So I think about the example that you are for her to give an example to our youth to our children to society on how you can live fully present in a moment and still be productive, still be successful, still be fulfilled, and not fall prey to whatever Zeitgeist whatever media social media expectation. So now all of a sudden, you're this ping pong ball that's going back and forth because of someone else's desires.
Megan Sumrell:Yeah. And even with that, there's boundaries she's having to learn there. No, this is my work time. You don't need me. But when it's over, you get me at 100%. It goes both ways with that, which I think is really important. And if I may, can I get on a math soapbox, because you can do about this, I love in your program that you're very, you know, yes, you are going to do some math. And if you want to own your finances, you need to do math. And I tell people, the same with your time, because time is numbers. And you have to learn the formula for you have X number of hours in the day, you have X number of things you're trying to fit in there. And I struggle when I hear people do that, I don't do math like Well, first and foremost. Would you ever walk into a room and say, I don't read, like what adult, whatever go do that. Ever feel comfortable doing that? Well, the math that is required of you to manage your finances. And the math that is required of you to manage your time is the math that we learned in first and second grade, we're talking addition and subtraction, and maybe a little multiplication are thrown in there from time to time, but you can do it on the calculator on your phone. So if anyone is thinking, Oh, I've got to be a math whiz, to get this planning under control to get my financial planning under control? No, it's you just need to get back in touch with your first and second grade math. And recognize that's all it really takes.
Mel Abraham:It's so true. It's so true. And thick. Look, it's and this may be confusing for folks. But I think it's a cop out.
Megan Sumrell:It's a total cop out. We may not like it. I mean, I hated writing papers in college. There's a reason I'd go get all the syllabuses and try and not take any classes where I had to write a paper, I don't like it, I prefer the numbers. But can I do it? Did I do it when I had to do it? Absolutely. And it was a skill set. And it was things we had to have. But with math today with the darn Google Sheets, Excel calculators, there really is very little for you to mentally process, you just need to put the inputs in and let the software do the outputs for you. I do believe it's a cop out because we just don't necessarily want to see what the answer is. Right, and then be confronted with making some hard choices.
Mel Abraham:Well, I think that's the crux of the issue is that if I do the calculation, if I look at this, then I have to face the facts.
Megan Sumrell:I don't want to go stand on the scale in my bathroom lately. The the numbers there.
Mel Abraham:I have a saying though I said, you know, you can put your head in the sand. You can as much as you want. But when the train hits you, it's still going to hurt. Yeah. And so when we talk about time, when we talk about money, the truth of both of those will come home to roost, either in I can't pay my bills, houses in foreclosure, we don't have enough for retirement or a relationships breaking up because you weren't present.
Megan Sumrell:Because it's constant. I'm too busy.
Mel Abraham:I'm too busy. You know, the whole classic cat's in the cradle son scenario for the song, you know. And the relationship I remember when Jeremy because I traveled and I spoke I was building a business when I became a single full time dad. And one of the things I did, there was two big things that I did. One was first to make sure that he knew he was a priority. No matter what was going on. I would cancel anything if he needed me. But to I created a calendar. And there was blocks on the calendar that were red. And he always knew that those red blocks were his I would never move. We do
Megan Sumrell:the same. We have our weekly thing up on the fridge so the whole family knows what's going on. And then when it's just us. Yeah.
Mel Abraham:And so it was setting expectations. It gave him some peace to know Dad's coming back this, you know, and I would never move. I do the same thing with Stephanie. Now we with our planning of our time, our staycations, our vacations and all that we block it out a year ahead of time when we say this is what it is. We had to put a family calendar in place when we got Buddha because someone had to be here with Budo. And what were we going to do? Yeah,
Megan Sumrell:absolutely. Absolutely. And it just, it pains me I felt because the culture that we're in now is also busy, so busy. And I mean my mom bless her heart and like mommy's been saying this to her for years when she'll call me and I answered most of the time when she calls and she'll always start the conversation. Oh sweetie, I know you're busy like mom Stop. I'm not busy. If I were in the middle of something really urgent, I wouldn't have answered the phone. I've answered the phone because I want to talk to you. But I think we've wired each other to almost feel like it's intrusive. To talk to people care about, like, no, let's stop that. We just need to stop propagating that I am not busy, I have a full life. I have a full calendar this week, maybe I've got a lot going on. But no, I'm never going to use busy as an excuse to not have the time for the things and that people that are important to me. Well, and I
Mel Abraham:think that comes from that very first part of what you do is when you start to set the the priorities with them. And they understand that I say that these are the priorities, then make them the priorities.
Megan Sumrell:And then when you have a framework in place to manage your time, just as you teach the machine for managing your money, then when something new comes in, hey, I want to buy a car, or hey, there's this opportunity over here write something to pull your finances or on the flip side, Hey, I've just been asked to serve on the Board of this thing. Can I fit that in? When you have the framework in place in the system, that you know what to go look at how to analyze that? What is that added? You know, whether it's an expense or income, you know, time or money, it allows you to make very intentional choices. And to do them in a way that again, you get to be in the driver's seat and understand if I say yes to this, here are the consequences of that. And is that okay? If I say yes to buying this new thing? Is this something I can afford to take on? If not, what choices Am I making? I mean, we just went that through that here's a family 10 days ago, we had to make the choice. Are we going to homeschool? Or are we going to continue with our school? If I didn't have the systems in place that I had for managing my time, home school never could have been an option, or it would be a complete disaster here right now, granted, it's not a well oiled machine yet. We're only 10 days in. But because of those systems in place of this is how we prioritize this is how we plan this is how we Okay, here's what this means from a time perspective. It's it's adding a new expense to my time budget. What are we shifting to accommodate that? I have to say after 10 days zoom, I mean, we've had some had some issues, but it's gone far more smoothly than I thought from a time perspective, but this is the gift of having these frameworks for anything in your life, whether it's finances, time, anything else, it allows you to accommodate change very thoughtfully, and far more easily than without it.
Mel Abraham:I've got a couple more questions that lead to this. And what you just said kind of leads to this, this kind of thought is this is when you're working with someone, and you're trying to manage and set all this up. Do you create I talked about in the construct of margin for volatility margin for error. But in time I kind of alternate is to leave space for margin for magic.
Megan Sumrell:Yeah, I call it planning for uncertainty. And so and everybody needs a different range of that, right? There have been stages of life for me, where I did not need to plan for much uncertainty, there wasn't a lot of that going on. There are other stages in life. I mean, when COVID hit my planning for uncertainty grew by like 40%, I did not know what I didn't know, every day, right. And it took a while. So I could bring that margin back down. So yeah, there are there are a number of different strategies that you can implement when it comes to planning your weeks, whether it's, you know, creating some padding in between appointments. And for some people that have consistent volatility day to day, that's a strategy that we put in place. The stage of life I'm in right now, where it's the day to day isn't the turn, it's kind of the big curveball that might come mid week or something. That's when where we teach a different strategy where I'll say, hey, it's actually the third thing that we put in your weekly plan for the week. How do we protect a chunk of time that in case something in the front of the week gets completely hijacked for something we know we have a space to go and move that. So there isn't a one size fits all? It's really understanding what is the level of uncertainty you need to plan for? And then do you need to build a daily strategies for that or weekly strategy for that as well?
Mel Abraham:So good, so good. So you've been on this Time journey, you're wanted to uplevel your money journey. Yeah, to be on where it's at. And so now you're bringing these things together? How are things changed?
Megan Sumrell:Oh, God, I don't know. It's like, I want to keep my language appropriate. Like, I feel like badass. It's really awesome. So, you know, my husband and I have, you know, on paper, we've always done the right things, right. You know, we were both W twos forever maxed out our 401 K's did all of that we have a financial advisor for investments. And he's always telling us, we're in great shape. And, you know, I'm embarrassed, I'm not embarrassed to admit it just hasn't become a priority for me yet. I just always kind of went well, if he says that we need to make these shifts, He knows our goals. I trust him, he keeps us in the loop, like I just kind of would not and go sounds great. But I never fully like, understood at all. And just was kind of trusting he knew where our goal was, and help us get there. And then, you know, this year has been a tremendous growth year for me in business. And I'm really at that point, I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna start making some serious like, I'm in a position here where we can really tap in this business is now going to be providing a whole new retirement vehicle for us that I didn't know about, right. And it looks very different. And so I found myself just and I've been listening to, you know, your stuff for years now. And the timing was just right, where I'm sitting in the spot going, I'm gonna make some big choices at the end of this year and starting in the next year. So I've been going through your blueprint, and you kind of know these things in theory, right? Well, yeah, I should be saving some I know, there's ways to help with minimizing taxes. But when I started investigating of okay, well, do I get an accountant? Do I get a bookkeeper? Do I get a CPA? What's the difference? How do we even make sure it's a good one? How do I tie them into this guy have already been working with for 16 years. It's scary, because you don't know what what you don't know, these are things you haven't been taught, right. And so I felt like the timing was perfect for me, because I knew I want to be in the driver's seat of this to say, this is the plan I want. And I want to know that when I'm having conversations with him or anyone else. I'm bringing questions to the table. And I'm driving the vision of this. And so for me going through your program is giving me the words to use the knowledge of I kind of knew some things well that I know I need to do it, but I didn't really fully understand why. So it shifts you from kind of felt like I've been in the passenger seat, I don't quite fit in the backseat. But I'm ready to get out of the passenger seat and get into the driver's seat. And now I know how to bring in the resources to help me really drive this. And so it is just a very empowering place to be in to know I know what's going on. But more importantly, I know how to set things up, that are going to make sure I'm hitting this goal. And if something goes haywire along the way, I'll know exactly what to do to get it back on track. So I'm just I'm loving it. It's, it's very empowering.
Mel Abraham:So good. I love hearing that. I love hearing that. So here's the thing. Man, I could talk to you for days with with some of the stuff because I think it is they are the two sides of the coin, the money in the the money and the time and everything. So
Megan Sumrell:you can have both, it doesn't have to be
Mel Abraham:yes. And if you're going to trade one for the other, then it isn't the life that was wrong. Yeah, comes wrong, something's wrong. And so I look at it, there's gonna be people that are sitting back saying, I get free to control my time. I'm gonna do that. So what does Megan have that can help them? How do they stay in touch with you? How do they follow you to get into your world to start to realize that as much as I want to drive my wealth, I need to drive my time along with it.
Megan Sumrell:So I will tell you the best resource to get a ton of step by step training is actually in my app. So I've got an app in both the App Store and Google Play, you can just search for it all one word, and it's called the pink bee with no spaces. It is $1.99 I'm not gonna say it's free, but it's not a subscription or anything. It just pays for the hosting. But in there I have step by step training videos showing you that kind of weekly planning process I was talking about. I show you exactly how I do it with a calendar. So we talked through and you get to see what is this basic five step process look like? I've also got training on some monthly planning steps in there, along with some other organizational things. I'm a bit believer if you only need one notebook in your life, not five, not seven, not 20 journals, not one of the car and one at your desk. So I do a whole training on how to stay organized with one notebook because it actually equates to time. And then there's a bunch of other stuff in there as well. And then if you are a podcast listener, which if you're watching this, you probably are, you can come out on any of the podcast platforms and look for work life harmony. They're super short episodes, each one teaching a very specific time management skill.
Mel Abraham:So cool, so cool, y'all tell me your time and the richness of your life ain't worth a buck 99.
Megan Sumrell:And if you can't do that, you need to get into Mel's program so that he can have the dollar 99 for it.
Mel Abraham:Oh, so good. Megan, thank you so much for being here. I will make sure that everyone's in the notes and all. But I truly and we'll continue this conversation. I think that there's so much goodness, that when we can control these two resources of time and money, and use them in the present moment to create movements and missions and live our calling that we will find that we're living the richest life possible.
Megan Sumrell:And it's really that you talk about not being stepping away from trading and getting into investing, right? That's what we're trying to do with our time, we need to get the skills so that every day it doesn't feel like we're day trading systems to have this investment of of our time. And it's a much happier place to live.
Mel Abraham:So good. So thank you again for being here. And I can't wait to see the impact that you have and watch you continue to soar make a difference in people's lives. And to give them the gift of time back which truth be told it is the most finite resource we have. We can't create it. I can't print it. I can't. I can't do any more of it. So it is what we got. Yeah. So thank you. Thank you. So I look forward to it. We'll hook it all up and y'all go get the app. All omegan and let's get your time back thank you for listening to the affluent entrepreneur show with me your host Mel Abraham. If you want to achieve financial liberation to create an affluent lifestyle, join me in the affluent entrepreneur Facebook group now by going to mele ram.com Ford slash group and I'll see you there