047. D’Arcy Benincosa: From Poverty to a Million Dollar Business

Overcoming Poverty to build a Million Dollar business. Today’s guest almost doesn’t need an introduction. I’ve admired her photography work from afar for years and had to pinch myself when she agreed to come on the show. She is a force to be reckoned with who’d rather play it brave than play it safe. Our conversation is nothing short of inspirational and will leave you lifting your eyes to the stars … It's an honor to have D’Arcy Benincosa sharing her story on the podcast today! 

WILDFLOWER SHOWNOTES : shannaskidmore.com/darcy-benincosa

Transcript

D'Arcy Benincosa (00:00):

Because I grew up in a community that never changed and nobody ever went anywhere or did anything. It was kind of like Pleasantville, if you've ever seen that movie, oh, I re-watched that movie. I'm like, yep, that was me breaking out of my small town life in Utah. And so I wrote in my journal, I'd much rather play it brave than play it safe. And that's actually how I came up with the title of my podcast. And so my whole life philosophy is play it brave. What do you want your memoir to say, D'Arcy? That's what I always ask myself when I'm afraid of something, the history of my life. What do I want it to say? She did the risk or she stayed and just did what was expected and typical.

Shanna Skidmore (00:41):

You are listening to Consider the Wildflowers the podcast, episode 47, overcoming Poverty to Build a Million Dollar Business. Today's guest almost doesn't need an introduction. I've admired her photography work from afar for years and had to pinch myself when she agreed to come on the show. She is a force to be reckoned with who'd rather play it brave than play it safe. Our conversation is nothing short of inspirational and will leave you lifting your eyes to the stars. It's an honor to have D'Arcy Benincosa sharing her story on the podcast today. If you dig professional bios, here goes. D'Arcy Benincosa is a world-renowned international photographer and an industry leading expert in marketing mindset and motivation for creative entrepreneurs. D'Arcy has worked for Sports Illustrated Magazine and her work and teachings have been featured in the Huffington Post. Martha Stewart, Out Magazine, ABC, NBC, the View and Upworthy.

(01:32)
D'Arcy has educated, consulted and inspired thousands while also founding three six figure businesses in the past decade. When she started, she had one camera, one lens, and a massive dream taking her small startup photography business from 16,000 to 120,000 in revenue in just 11 months. All right, y'all formal introductions over, let's hear from D'Arcy. Hey, it's Shana, and this is Consider the Wildflowers, the podcast. For the past 15 plus years, I've had the honor to hear thousands of stories from entrepreneurs around the world. As a former Fortune 100 financial advisor, turn business consultant, I have a unique opportunity to see the reel, but behind the highlight reel, I'm talking profit and loss statements, unpaid taxes, moments of burnout, and those of utter victory. Or as my husband says, the content everyone is wondering but not many are talking about. And now I'm bringing these private conversations to you. Hear the untold stories of how industry leaders, founders, and up and coming entrepreneurs got their start, the experiences that shaped them and the journey to building the brands they have today. Stories that will inspire and reignite encourage to redefine success and build a life in business on your own terms. Welcome Wildflower. I'm so glad you're here. Hi, D'Arcy. Welcome to the show. I'm so glad you're here and that we're doing this.

D'Arcy Benincosa (02:44):

Thank you so much for having me. I always love chatting with you, chatting about money and business, my favorite things.

Shanna Skidmore (02:50):

I know. It was so fun. So it was such an honor to be on your podcast recently, so that was the first time we really connected, and I'm just so excited to dig more into your story today. And so thanks for just coming on and sharing all the things,

D'Arcy Benincosa (03:07):

The stories we have to tell.

Shanna Skidmore (03:10):

Will you just tell everybody who you are and then we're going to kind of kick it back to life before business.

D'Arcy Benincosa (03:15):

Okay. Hi, I'm D'Arcy Benincosa. I am a destination wedding photographer. Turned I guess educator. I was an educator long before I was ever a photographer. I was a school teacher for 14 years, broke out and took my hobby into my passion into creating a business. And from there, yeah, I've scaled pretty, I scaled pretty quickly and just love educating, love traveling, love being independent, love making passive income, all those good things.

Shanna Skidmore (03:45):

It's a full circle moment. I didn't know you were an educator before becoming a photography educator. How cool?

D'Arcy Benincosa (03:52):

Well, I think I was just a natural born teacher, and what is sad is what teachers get paid in our country. And so I knew I had the teacher archetype in me and I just needed to let it birth in a different way than it was birthing in our system in America.

Shanna Skidmore (04:14):

Yeah. Okay. D'Arcy, tell me life before business. So you went to school for education, you were teaching, just walk me through before even starting your photography business.

D'Arcy Benincosa (04:26):

So I was just a wanderlust person and I moved to Paris when I was 20 years old and I had this little point and shoot camera and I started, I didn't have a lot of friends at the beginning, and anytime you move somewhere new, you have to take that time to build friendships and things like that. This is long before cell phones existed. This was 1997, and I moved over to Paris and found myself in this beautiful, amazing city with a camera. And I just started really honing my photography craft. Then I then went and finished my degree in English and French and traveled the world teaching English, which was really, really cool. From Korea to, I spent time studying educational systems in the favelas of Brazil to working and living in Ireland to having a very high profile job in Switzerland. And then half the year would be in Portugal for this company. So I basically, all of my twenties were devoted to getting two degrees teaching across the globe and really experiencing the world as a young artist, which was amazing.

Shanna Skidmore (05:37):

I mean, what an incredible story and journey and I'm sure life experiences. Did you have family member? Did you always love to travel? Did you have family members that took you on trips? How did you see this love of travel? Yeah, being born, I mean, I feel like as a 20 year old, I would be so nervous to move to parents.

D'Arcy Benincosa (05:54):

Oh, I know my, parents were so nervous for me, they were really scared. They're scared at most of what I do because they live what I call Groundhogs Day. I love my parents to death, but they have basically lived the same day a million times since I was little. Same house, same food to eat, same job, same. Everything is very traditional. Back then, when you would stay at a job for 30 years, and when I was little, I think I was seven or eight, and I don't even know how I learned this, but I told my mom, I'm going to live in Paris and I'm going to live in New York. And when it came time to choose a language to learn in school, seventh grade junior high, my dad was like, please learn Spanish. It will give you, so we have so many Spanish speakers in Utah and in the west.

(06:41)

And now I really do wish I spoke better Spanish, but my dad was like, please learn Spanish. And I said, well, but dad, I'm going to live in France, so I need to learn French. And I knew that by that age. And so the very first biography I remember reading as a kid way back in elementary school was a biography of Joan of Arc and just this young girl leading this army and she's like 15. And I related to her so much. And what else I related is I have this very funny French name, it's D apostrophe, capital A R C Y. I don't really get it. I was like, what were you thinking, dad? It's a French name because my dad got to name me. But when you look at Joan of ARC's name in French, it's Jean d apostrophe a r c, Jean of Arc Dark. It's a French way of saying it. And so even our names were so similar. So I think my podcast is called Play It Brave, because I remember writing in my journal because I grew up in a community that never changed and nobody ever went anywhere or did anything. It was kind of Pleasantville, if you've ever seen that movie. Yes.

(07:47)

With Reese Witherspoon and Toby McGuire. Oh, I re-watched that movie. I'm like, yep. That was me breaking out of my small town life in Utah. And so I wrote in my journal, I'd much rather play it brave than play it safe. And that's actually how I came up with a title of my podcast. And so my whole life, Phil philosophy is play it brave. What do you want your memoir to say, D'Arcy? That's what I always ask myself when I'm afraid of something. Even if I don't ever write a memoir, it's a good my life, me, my memoir, absolutely the history of my life. What do I want it to say? She did the risk or she stayed and just did what was expected and typical, right? Yeah. That's how I make my decisions.

Shanna Skidmore (08:31):

I love it. I heard a interview with Elizabeth Gilbert, this was years and years ago, and she said, I was talking about the idea of passion, and she said, if I had a hundred different jobs in my lifetime, how incredible of an experience that was. And I've botched how she said it, but it was just this really interesting moment of That's so true. I think sometimes we for, I don't know if it's safety or like you said, kind of the groundhog Day of life, but it's so interesting and unique to try these different things. So it was just a really cool moment when I heard that from her of like, yeah, that's so true. Go experience things, try things, have fun. And sometimes we fear. We fear them.

D'Arcy Benincosa (09:15):

And I think we also, so I heard a podcast about a woman, a very successful woman, I can't remember her name. If I find it out, I'll send it. She purposefully changes her career every 10 years, she starts a new job, a new venture, something different because who you become when you're building a business. I think who we become as we're building these creative businesses or doing something different is the whole point. It's the whole goal. And I have a very unique life where I don't have kids and I don't have a husband, and I'm in my forties and I've never had kids and I've never had a husband. And so my life has really been, I've made every single decision in my life, which can get kind of exhausting because I'm like, can somebody just tell me what to do? Or could somebody be in on this with me?

(10:08)

I have to make every decision myself. Yeah, do I spend my money here? Do I invest here? Do I do here? And I've always kind of envied that partnership. Having that partnership where you have somebody else, it mutually invested in this life. At the same time, I've also witnessed a lot of women who are like, well, I can't do that. My husband won't let me, or I can't spend that, or It's not my money. And I'm like, Ugh, the upside. Because every side of something has a great side and kind of a hard side, a light and a dark. The upside of me making every single one of my own decisions is I can put myself at risk. If we want to call at risk, sure, I can give myself these experiences. I can do crazy things. I can't tell you the number of times I decided to move to New York City in 48 hour period, and within a week I was there.

(10:59)

Yeah, I found the apartment, I found the situation. That was my second time moving back to New York. And so there, there's something, yeah, I think there is something really powerful in being very consistent and having some stability when you're older. But my twenties, the twenties, you need to explore. Please don't go become a full-time entrepreneur in your twenties. You're too young. You can do it, I guess. And money's great, but I think you should go spend a year in Thailand or yeah, just learn the world first before you decide on the big life decisions. My take, because that's what I know.

Shanna Skidmore (11:36):

Yeah. Oh, this is whole conversation. I mean, we just went right into it and I'm loving every second. So you did education around the world for, what'd you say? 13 years?

D'Arcy Benincosa (11:49):

Like 14

Shanna Skidmore (11:51):

14 Years.

D'Arcy Benincosa (11:51):

Crazy. Yeah.

Shanna Skidmore (11:52):

Okay. And then tell me about the transition, D'Arcy. I mean, when were you thinking, I want to take, was I want to take photography, or you just wanted to stop what you were doing and do something new? How did the photography business begin?

D'Arcy Benincosa (12:07):

Yeah, so it happened when I'm a school teacher and I learn about this new thing called the law of attraction or manifestation or that movie, the Secret came out and your thoughts are things. This was a very new concept at the time. And I started looking into that, and I did what a lot of people now know as building a wealth mindset. I grew up very, very poor to the point where when I was a little kid in our house that had one bathroom and three bedrooms and five kids and two parents, so seven people. My parents at one point took us all into the living room and set up a tent. Well, it was like the one gathering room, and there was a pot belly stove, and my mom would heat water on it and we would light lanterns at night. My parents said we were indoor camping.

(13:02)

I now realize we didn't have any money to pay our utilities, and my parents were trying to keep us warm. We had no hot water. We had no electricity for a couple of months because my parents have never been good with money, declared bankruptcy twice. Money was very, very hard. And as a school teacher, I was making about 50,000 a year, and that felt luxurious. I could pay my bills. I was able to just, that's what I thought a salary was. And when I started to do a wealth mindset, I realized I really loved learning how to make money. I loved the idea of ending these bad cycles with money. I, I had always told myself I was never a numbers person because I was a creative and I didn't like math. And I started to change the story. I was telling myself I would write out little note cards, you are a numbers person, you understand investment.

(13:58)

And then I would go right back to a book about reading about investments, even though it was hard. And as I did this mindset growth, I came to a conundrum. This is what most of us face, this problem, that we can't seem to make sense in our heads. I am learning how to make more money and learning that I am worthy of more money and learning this entrepreneur mindset. And yet I am in a government job where no matter how good of a teacher you are, and I was one of the best, I loved teaching and I loved my students, you can never make more money. The Joe Smith across the hall who just showed the kids videos for their history lessons, he made the same amount as I did, even though I was putting in so much more time, so much more effort, all of these things.

(14:44)

And so I thought, how am I going to make more money in my career? And at that point, I never thought, you're going to have to change. And then finally the light bulb went on, you're going to have to change career D'Arcy there. This is a dead empath financially, and you don't want to just make 50,000 a years. I had a big desire to be a millionaire, to be like, what would it be like to be the first Ben and COSA to make a million dollars? I really felt that coming up in me. And so the day came when I realized I have to quit my job. And I had taken a photography workshop, and the photographer was sharing that at the time, he was making $250,000 a year, and I thought, what? You're making $250,000 a year as a photographer? I had never known a photographer who had made that kind of money. And he got to a lot more than that. I think now he's still, he makes a lot of money then that's when I was like, oh, you've been a photographer your whole life, D'Arcy. Now it's time to make money at it. Yeah. Turn it into a business and learn everything you need to learn about making a business. And that's exactly what I did.

Shanna Skidmore (15:56):

Was this what, 2010 ish, D'Arcy?

D'Arcy Benincosa (15:59):

Yeah. So I started learning marketing around 2010. I opened my L L C 2011, the very end of 2011. So basically the start of 2012, and I quit my school teaching job 2013. And that year of 2012 when I was doing a school teaching and photography, I made $16,000. And when I quit teaching, I went full, full-time photography. I made $120,000 my first year. That's incredible. Which is insane.

Shanna Skidmore (16:26):

Yeah. Oh my goodness. This is, so photography was your passion. I love how you said, I've been a photographer my whole life. Now it's time to make money doing it. So did you take other education? How did you learn? Tell me about those early days of photography. Did you have a goal? I'm going to replace my income and then I'm safe to quit. And how did you price yourself and was it weddings from the beginning? How did you come up with what you were going to sell?

D'Arcy Benincosa (16:50):

So I quit before I was ready. That was really scary. But I knew that I needed the time because I was an English and drama teacher and I was putting on the school place. I would work until eight or 9:00 PM at night when we were in play mode. So I quit before I was ready, and I took that summer and really built a couple of things. So the first thing I did was I had been working on my Instagram and Sports Illustrated magazine, the director of photography. I was only posting portraits, and this is when it was only still images somehow found me and reached out and told me he loved my portraits. And I, I'm like, is this a fake account? Yeah. Because I could not imagine, but I had been working on portraiture since 1995 probably. Yeah, that's, so this was 2 0 11, 11 ish, 12 ish, I think it was beginning of 2012 and that moment.

(17:55)

So I told him, he's like, I'd be really interested to seeing how you could work for us. And I had lived in New York before. That's where I got my master's degree was at NYU and directing, which really played a key into me learning how to shoot doing weddings, because I was already directing large scale musicals and weddings are kind of just like that. So I told him, I said, Hey, well, I'll be in New York at this time. And he's like, great, bring in your portfolio. And I was like, sure. So I didn't know how to even take a portfolio. I didn't know know anything. So I was Googling and I printed out my top 50 images and I printed them on really fine art paper. I put them in this beautiful box, and I remember flying to New York. I flew there for 48 hours, just he didn't know that.

(18:45)

He thought I was just there. Sure. Whatever. And the building that Sports Illustrated in is the Time Warner Building, which is the same building if you've ever seen the movie, the Secret Life of Walter Middy, which is such a great movie for photographers and artists to watch and all humans, because it really is about this whole thing we're talking about, right? Playing it. Brave Walter Middy breaks out of this boring life he's in to go on the grandest adventure of his life. I get chills every time I watch that movie. I'm just like, oh my gosh, this is what my life stands for. And so I'm walking into the Walter Middy building. I go up the stairs. I have my Sports Illustrated name tag. I walk down this hallway that is just full of cover issues of the most incredible magazine that's been around forever.

(19:30)

And there they are. And I walk into this office and I present my portfolio, and he kind of chuckles because he is like, I've never had it presented this. And I said, oh, what do people do? He goes, they usually just bring me an iPad. And I scroll through and I'm like, oh, that would've made more sense. And I was like, and I'm like, well, I shoot film still, and I really like for you to have a tangible experience. I know how to spin anything. Yes. So he takes it out. And what's so cool is in that moment, he takes all 50 images and he divides them into three piles. So without him even knowing it, he's showing me what work resonates and what doesn't. And he gives me basically a portfolio review right then, and he talks about it, and then that's it. He doesn't, he just wanted to get to meet me.

(20:14)

I leave and I have a vision board. I used to work a lot with vision boards. It was kind of those things where I'd put everything I want. And what I do a little differently is I put everything I want to achieve in a year on this vision board. And as it comes true, I take it down and I had this vision board in front of me and it had one thing left, and what it had was my name badge that I got that day that said Sports Illustrated, because I kept it and I had it on there and I was looking at it. It was above my desk, my computer. So I just look up and there it was. And I closed my eyes one, and I was like, how am I going to make this Sports Illustrated thing happen? And I kid you not, Shanna, these are the things you can't make up.

(20:53)

When synchronicity happens, the phone rings. It is the secretary. She's asking me to come work on a shoot for Sports Illustrator. And it is. I know. And it is for 10 days in the month of September, and I hadn't quit school teaching yet because I was like, I need one more year to get really, like you said, stable. And because we always want that extra year. We always want to be stable. We always want to be smart, we always want to plan. I had none of those, and I knew that I couldn't take 10 days off from teaching school at the first of the year. No high school I know would be like, sure, yeah, take 10 whole days. The second week school has started and so I knew I needed to quit my job, and the universe gave me a huge sign in this way of Sports Illustrated.

(21:37)

I took the job and worked on that shoot for 10 days. It was photographing. I was the assistant, I was not the lead photographer. Sports Illustrated would never trust a newbie with that. But I did basically everything from styling it to coordinating to everything. I was working all hours. I've never worked so hard on a job, but we photographed all the winter Olympian hopefuls, and they had such a great shoot that they put out four different cover photos for the magazine of all the people who won the gold medalist. So I won. I met all the gold medalists before they won their thing. And it was an incredible education. It was something that propelled me into this world of photography with already a pretty awesome thing to put on my resume. And from there, I built my business three ways. So if I'm going on too much, let me know, but I'll just talk about the, 

Shanna Skidmore (22:28):

I Love it. I'm on the edge of my seat. I'm like, you're such an incredible storyteller. I mean, I'm like, got chills over here. Yeah, you're doing great.

D'Arcy Benincosa (22:34):

So I decided to do three offers. So one was going to be weddings, because that was how I saw that. My friend John, who I went to his workshop, John Canlis, that's how I saw that he was making money. And so because of his workshop, I had a pretty good idea of how to put packages together. I ate up every day of his workshop. It was the, I didn't know it at the time, but it was the best one I could have ever gone to. He was a master. I had known him way back in college and just went to it for fun, not even having a business. So I put packages together for that, but I knew it was going to take time to build that. So until then, I wanted to have something that wasn't dependent on the market, so to speak. Weddings are kind of one-offs.

(23:19)

I mean, you can try to get that client to book from you again and again and again. And I do have that happen occasionally. But for the most part, I photographed the wedding around the world and I never see them again. So I needed something stable. So the first thing I said about was making sure that I had 50 K a year coming in through commercial photography and commercial and stock photography. I will say, and this sounds so silly, but I just out feelers on Facebook, this was back in the day when people used Facebook a lot more than they did Instagram. And an acquaintance I had met who in, when I was living in Korea, was now working for a university. And the university had a $25,000 budget for photos for the year that they had to use or they would lose it. And within four weeks of doing the Sports Illustrate job, I did my first job for this university and I got paid $8,000 for it, which as a school teacher, I was bringing home after taxes like 28 to 3,200 a month, which is insane. So an $8,000 paycheck, I'm like, that's three months worth. 

Shanna Skidmore (24:23):

You're right. You're like, I got this

D'Arcy Benincosa (24:25):

And so I built that relationship and started to do quarterly work for them. And then another part of the university hired me. So within a year, I had built a $50,000 a year salary just from these jobs. That did not depend on getting a wedding inquiry, because as any wedding photographer will know, the hardest part is waiting for those inquiries to come in your inbox. And the scariest part is when they don't, because you're like, what do I do? And it's one of those things now with good marketing, I can gauge. I have inquiries come in every month, but at the beginning I was really nervous, so I did that. The second thing I did is I thought I'm going to build, even though I knew family photography wasn't like my first love, but I knew I could do it. And this is from a woman who directed 50 8th graders in, you're a Good Man, Charlie Brown musical, so I can do some family sessions.

(25:16)

So I decided, and I did this in one month, I decided I'm going to do these mini sessions. I'll charge $350 and I'm going to have my first $10,000 a month doing it. This is exactly three weeks after the Sports Illustrated job. And one month after my photography salary expired because you get paid through the summer. So my last paycheck was September, 2013, and my job was sports. I'll say Straighted was September, 2013, the month of October. So two weeks before I created a whole marketing campaign about how I was going to do these mini sessions. I networked with everybody. I had no problem saying it. And I had this whole Facebook system of promotion, and by the end of that month, I had made $12,000. And that was insane again. So I made 12,000 in October, November, I got the commercial, my first commercial gig for 8,000, and that was the first 20, that was almost two 10 K months right after my school teacher paycheck had ended. And if you have 12, 10 K months, what do you make? $120,000. And that is how it started.

Shanna Skidmore (26:28):

Yeah. Oh my goodness. D'Arcy, your story is so inspiring. I truly am. Was so engaged with what's going on, and thank you for sharing just how you're breaking it down, how you're thinking. I love it. I love how you structured your offers. Did this all just come naturally to you, or were you scared to charge what you were charging, how, it sounds like you do a lot of mindset work. I'm just so intrigued by the fact that you're making 10 K months right off the bat. Do you think that's a natural gift or something that came easily for you?

D'Arcy Benincosa (27:04):

Yeah, I think we all have some natural gifts. The way I like to explain it when people work with me is I talk a lot about the four main archetypes that make up humanities, like power centers. They're the queen, the warrior, the magician, and the lover. And the magician, which I really relate to is somebody who can create, see a thought and turn it into form. And that is a gift I definitely have. But I will say what helped me really develop it is two years before I quit school teaching, I started taking marketing classes like weekends. There was this one called Experts Academy, and it was run by Brendan Brouchard back in the day. He doesn't run it anymore. And I flew out to San Jose and did, it was maybe a three to four day thing I did in the summer. And he broke down step by step how to position yourself as an expert in your field.

(28:02)

And one thing that I noticed that creative people don't do is they have a lot of self-doubt. They're afraid to sell. So they're not afraid to create the art, but they get very nervous to sell the art. And I always have associated the word sell with serve. And so I'm also not afraid to sell. I have no qualms. I know what I offer is valuable. And when I first started shooting weddings, I was charging 2,700. So it wasn't like, now it's a big advocate for 10 K a day, don't work less than $10,000 as a luxury wedding photographer. And I can break down why, because people get really nervous when they hear that number. But when you break down your expertise according to the experience you give and all the hours and how you're upselling and serving everybody, it is a $10,000 experience at least.

(28:56)

And my mini sessions were 350, which now my mini sessions are 1500. So at the time, I felt like they were on par with somebody of my expertise. And also because I did so many of them, and I built such good relationships. And one thing I really am good at, I don't drop the ball and I follow up. So all of those people who did mini sessions with me that first year, 2013, they all came back and brought their friends. 2014, they all came back and brought their friends. 2015, they all came back. I have a really good follow up, support, nurture. I love funnels when you talk about a funnel, how people experience brand. And I think that creatives don't learn the marketing business side as much. I think it's different now though, because everybody's almost teaching this stuff now. So I do think more creatives are, I still think they psych themselves out. And I was a 34 year old woman. My self-confidence was great. I didn't go through the whole, I mean, I did in my twenties, but I didn't go through this whole, am I worth this? Worth

Shanna Skidmore (30:06):

My

D'Arcy Benincosa (30:07):

Worth? Yeah. I had other life experiences that taught me how to find my worth really fast and had to stand for myself in a lot of ways. I had a very hard upbringing. And so I think in that way, going into a business was not the scariest thing I'd ever done. It's not the hardest thing I ever faced. I'd faced a lot of scary hard things before that. So going into business was play. I made it a game. I didn't take it, when I say didn't take it seriously, if something went wrong, I would not spend endless hours beating me up and then never letting myself try. I watched some educators, photographers or whatever, turn educator, they have one bad launch. It wrecks them for good. They never want to try again. Yeah, that's not me. Yeah. I'm like, oh, it went bad. Why? Let's fix it. Right? Yeah. And let's do it again.

Shanna Skidmore (30:59):

Oh, D'Arcy, this is so good. Just thank you for sharing so much of your story. I love that you give the numbers that you gave those numbers because three 50 a session, that's doable. 2,700 a wedding, that's doable. And I think so often we look at your success in other industry leaders and it can feel impossible for somebody, especially newer in the business. And so I just think it, thank you for sharing your numbers like that because I think it's really encouraging to know that with hard work, with consistency, with showing up and doing good work, it does pay off. Okay. I'm going to ask you a question because I want to fast forward to where you are now. But looking back, would you say that there was a turning point in your business where things really started to catch or just major shifts and pivots? Because I want to hear how you got to what you're doing now and all that. So just kind of walk me through the trajectory and growth of the business.

D'Arcy Benincosa (31:57):

So I think two main things happened. One was my photography career had one moment that was those viral moments that you can never predict will happen. No amount of marketing will make it happen. And what happened, it was same-sex marriage got legalized in the state of Utah back in 2012. And one of my friends were the first gay couple to get married in Utah. And I ran down there because everybody was flocking to the courthouse because they didn't know how long it would be legal for. And it was only legal for, I think 48 hours until it got shut down. And I took all these photos, I was like, this is people's day. They don't have time for a photographer. And I just went down there and gave my heart, and I just started taking photos and video of everybody. And unbeknownst to me, I had more footage and more things than most of the news stations.

(32:50)

And so wow, I got asked on a BBC news, and then I got asked on NBC News, and then I booked a wedding from that that got featured on the Ellen DeGeneres show, and then it was featured on the View. So a lot of big things happened, and my work got seen, and the bookings really, really picked up. And I started shooting a ton of weddings and I jumped my prices to 4,000 in the space of a month or two. But then the $4,000 was kind of a dead zone for me. And I ended up booking this seven and a half thousand dollars wedding from this couple in LA who were coming to marry in Park City. And then a month after that, I booked my first 10 and a half K wedding, and I knew exactly how to do it. And the upleveling happened really, really quickly because of that magical thing.

(33:38)

So that was a major turning point. And then the second major turning point is when I decided to start mentoring other people. And that happened, I took two months off from my beautiful career, and I built the systems that I was utilizing into a program and put it into a very, when I coach people, listen, I have had coaches who are like, whatever you want to talk about, what are you feeling? How does that make you feel? And I appreciate that, but I am a girl who's like, Uhuh, I need a list. I need a set of strategies. I need to know exactly what you did. And I know that it won't replicate in exactly the same way for me, but it's going to give me a pretty good roadmap. And so I put together the roadmap, took two months off and then launched it.

(34:26)

And within one five day period, I sold seven at three and a half thousand dollars. So do the math. I think that's like what, 21? That's something like in the twenties. It's in the twenties. And I did that in one week. And that blew my mind. And those clients have hired me. I get repeat coaching clients because they love what they accomplish when we're working together because like I said, I'm really good. You've seen, I'm really good at molding this beautiful art. My images are beautiful artistic. I put a lot of my creative in there, and that's kind of like my feminine energy. And then the masculine or the structured en energy, which is all about systems, strategies, follow up funnels, just running the business without all the emotion type of thing, getting down that is really strong. And so those two really came together. And then my coaching business grew very quickly and became its own million dollar business outside of what I do with my photography and things like that.

Shanna Skidmore (35:33):

When did you start mentoring D'Arcy?

D'Arcy Benincosa (35:34):

2016.

Shanna Skidmore (35:36):

Okay. And then that's when you launched your very first course as well?

D'Arcy Benincosa (35:41):

I launched my first course in 2018. So what I did was in those two years of mentorship, I wrote down every single question my clients had about building it, and then I created the course around that. And so I launched the marketing map in 2018, and it had a six figure launch.

Shanna Skidmore (35:59):

That's amazing. That's so fun to hear your story because, so I did, I've been in finance now for 15 years, but I had my consulting company for three years, had the exact same thing happening, was answering the same questions over and over and over and over again. I took two months off and wrote the blueprint model. We launched it in 2016, did a hundred thousand dollars launch. And it's just been really cool journey to, I think now there's so much more education. I don't have an education background, so I was like, well, I don't know. I'm just, how can I serve more? And I've had to learn how to be a great teacher, but now there's a lot more education available. But back in those days, it really wasn't, like you've mentioned several times, it wasn't as accessible. And I think having that type of success is just a game changer in business. And it sounds like for you, that became a big turning point when you were mentoring, then educating, and now you've grown a million dollar business just with the education side.

D'Arcy Benincosa (36:59):

Yeah. Yeah. It's funny because people are like, do you still shoot weddings? That's kind of like their measure. If I'm in touch with what they're doing, and I do. But at the same time, even if I didn't, I know how to run the foundations of a very successful business. And so I do think it's important to have had experience doing the thing you're teaching and then to constantly be in the know of. So me right now, the biggest thing I'm learning right now is chat, G P T, and how is that going to affect my business? How will it affect my client's businesses? How will I teach this to make it easily understandable? That is one thing. I think as a teacher of high school kids, I learned how to be one really compelling and interesting, so I didn't lose their interest. And two, how to break things down really, really simply with objectives and making sure it's broken down.

(37:54)

And I think we're moving away from traditional college. I think that it's not as appealing to people unless you do. My older sister's an accountant and my other sister's a nurse. Those are things you go for. But entrepreneurship, so many people are starting their own businesses. We're really, I mean, we don't even go into big offices to work that much anymore. Even the big offices are learning how to be at home, doing your own thing, working in your zone of genius. And so there are more opportunities than ever before to run a successful business. And I also want to say, I think one hard thing about being on Instagram and stuff is it looks like everybody's a millionaire. And I was super, the difference between 500,000 and a million has just made it so I invest more money and invest in real estate. My life hasn't changed a lot.

(38:45)

I'm not, but I'm not a super, let's go buy this new car and let's go do this. That's just not my personality. And I think the pressure to make multiple millions makes people feel like a failure if they're making 250,000, and that is an incredible paycheck, that is such an incredible paycheck, and it can bring such freedom to your life. And so I do think the idea of being a millionaire is sold all over, and I don't think everybody needs to achieve that. My sister always says that she makes around three, her and her husband. She's like, we are so happy. I don't spend my whole life marketing. I'm not on Instagram. All the, yeah, I put a lot of content out, podcast, all of this to be relevant and stay in that space, but it doesn't have to be in that big of a scale either.

Shanna Skidmore (39:31):

Yeah. Oh, D'Arcy. So good. Okay. I'm going to ask you two questions and then I want to go into a quick fire round. But the first is, what would you say is the best thing that you have learned about money?

D'Arcy Benincosa (39:46):

That it's an energy that is met, that is grows when you help people solve their problems. The thing I've learned the most this past year, it's not the most important thing in life, and I have really restructured my life lately to not be all about the money. I think there is this hungry phase you go through to prove to yourself that you can make money, especially if you never had any money. And then once you show that you can do it, then you can either go the route where you become obsessed with it and it takes up all your waking thoughts and you have to be a multimillionaire, and it's a place where you find your worth, or it can just be a beautiful tool. Basically, money is a tool, and we get to decide what it means in our lives, and we get to decide how much importance it takes up and how we're going to use it. So money is a tool. It is not good or bad. It is neutral. We are the ones who put all the stories on it about what it means in our lives. Yeah.

Shanna Skidmore (40:49):

That's so good. Okay. Speaking, this goes back to what you just mentioned a minute ago, which is why I wanted to ask it before we go into a quick fire round. In a world that kind of ask us to do everything well, how do you focus your time and your energy? I'm asking this a little differently only because you just mentioned you put out a lot of content, you run at high level. Not everybody can do that. How do you find the pace that works for you? Has there been a time when it hasn't worked, I guess is my second? Oh, yeah.

D'Arcy Benincosa (41:19):

Yeah. I'm still recovering from burnout from years ago in the sense where I now make sure I get rest. I have an end to my workday. I think what is such a beautiful question right there, and this is something I was asked by a coach, and until she asked it, I didn't realize it was a question I needed to answer. And that was, D'Arcy, what's your capacity? How much can you handle and still be a happy human being? And I never asked that because when you're trying to make money at a business, you take any money that comes in and you find and make the time at the sacrifice of eating well at the sacrifice of moving your body, at the sacrifice of sleep, at the sacrifice of relationships. I sacrificed all of those things and then I realized, oh, my ideal work time for me to be a happy, healthy, productive, loving person who can show up in her relationships at times.

(42:17)

I will say when I launch, everybody knows that they won't see me for a month. And that's okay, right? I'm not always perfectly balanced, but I understand when I'm going to be launching and I understand how to rest after the launch and what my capacity is. And so when I divide up my day and see how long I'm working, what I can say yes to and what I can say no to, gets very, very clear. I got offered a chance to come to Croatia and do a really amazing workshop, and I had to make this decision yesterday, and I really want to go to Croatia. I've never been. The locations to shoot in there are phenomenal. I wanted to go there because everybody's doing Paris and everybody takes all the same models, all the photographers are doing the same thing again and again. And then when I got real, I'm like, well, the truth is people are wanting to see more of my real weddings.

(43:09)

They don't want to see my style shoots as much. It will not make a lot of money because the European market doesn't pay the same for workshops. So I had to go through where my artistic stuff wanted to be like, yeah, yes, I'll be there. Of course, let's make it happen. My business self was like, you will have just gotten back from a week in Switzerland when the time this is happening. You already have a really killer real wedding that you're going to take people behind the scenes to next April. This is fine. I had to say no. Yeah, because it wasn't the best. Even though it was fun and exciting, it wasn't the best use of my time right now. It could be in the future, but understanding your capacity, I personally need to not start work till 10:00 AM because I like to get up. I like to take a walk. I like to meditate. I like to eat a healthy breakfast. If I can have a good breakfast, it sets the tone of my whole day, and then I'm ready to sit and work. And then I'm so productive for the rest of the day. But I need those two hours to myself in the morning, right? For me to be my happiest, healthiest self. So I think understanding your capacity,

Shanna Skidmore (44:14):

Such a good question. Let's go into a quick fire. Okay. See where it takes us, D'Arcy, what is the one thing you would be embarrassed if people knew?

D'Arcy Benincosa (44:23):

The voice I use when talking to my dogs, it's really embarrassing, and I've never heard a voice like that come out. And I don't know if mothers do that with their children, but my dogs look like stuffed animals, and I can't not talk to them in oh duh, in these little voices that I'm like, who have I become?

Shanna Skidmore (44:42):

That makes me so happy? What kind of dogs do you have?

D'Arcy Benincosa (44:44):

I have a little, I anxious Pomeranian and a very sweet, chill Maltese. And they represent the two sides of my brain. And when the dog is super anxious, I'm like, what are you being anxious about, D'Arcy? Where are you playing? Where are you giving into fear? Whatever. They're such good models for that.

Shanna Skidmore (45:04):

I love it. You got me cracking up. This is so fun. Okay. Any regrets or wish you could do over moments?

D'Arcy Benincosa (45:11):

Yeah. I really, because I'm a plus size woman, I held myself back from starting a YouTube channel and putting myself out there for years because I told myself I was too overweight to do it. And that would be a, and really nobody cares. No, it was just me and I was holding myself back. And I think there are stories we tell ourselves that tell us why we can't do something, and we don't tell ourselves enough stories of why we are the exact person to be doing it. And what's been really awesome, as I've started to get more photos and I've started to show up more in front of the camera, I get dms on the daily from people who have body image issues, who are the way you show up is helping me see that I can show up too. And luckily, our society is starting to move in that way. Women are still just really harsh judges of them themselves and other women, and especially their bodies. So I think if I, yeah, that's one regret I have.

Shanna Skidmore (46:06):

D'Arcy. Thank you for sharing that. I have a two-year-old little girl. She is so cute. Madeline is her name. And I think sometimes when I speak negativity over myself or I say unkind things to myself, I get teary eyed thinking about, I look at her and I think, would I want her to speak to herself that way? I just see. And so it's been really helpful for me to go through this life experience and in ways to be kinder to ourself. I think in some ways we all, whether it's body image or whatever, that struggle is, speaking truth and kindness to ourself is so important. So

D'Arcy Benincosa (46:49):

It's so beautiful. And I keep a picture of myself at four years old by my desk. And when I have, listen, I have an overworking tendency. I'm, I'm a three on the Enneagram. I am the achiever. And when I've been sitting at my desk too long, I'll look at her and I'll be like, you're right. It's time to go play. And we got to go play and have fun. Cause otherwise, why are we working so hard? Right? Yeah.

Shanna Skidmore (47:13):

Oh, good. Oh, I just want to talk to you for, okay, let's, next one big win or pinch me moment

D'Arcy Benincosa (47:19):

When I hugged Jason Mamoa. Beautiful in person. That's S

hanna Skidmore (47:24):

So fun. Yeah.

D'Arcy Benincosa (47:25):

Oh, he was so beautiful. It was incredible.

Shanna Skidmore (47:30):

Total. Total. Big one. So great. All right. Best advice or just really good advice that you have received?

D'Arcy Benincosa (47:38):

It's better to ask for a slap on the face than a pat on the back. And what that means is you have to get really honest with yourself. And I've had coaches and mentors who they just wanted to be nice and nice is not the same as loving. And sometimes the most loving thing you can do is be really truthful. Nice people always say yes when sometimes the most loving thing you can do is say no. A loving to yourself and them, even if it feels hard, all parents know this. So I have gotten really good at taking feedback without getting defensive, and it has made me such a better artist and a better creator, a better business owner. So it's not about a tough skin, but I want people in my life who will be truthful and not just try to butter me up and just make me feel good. I want to feel good too. Right. But you feel so much better when you actually get the skills and the answers to take you to the next level. Yeah. So it's spare to ask for a slap slap in the face than a pat

Shanna Skidmore (48:47):

On the face. Did somebody tell you that or did

D'Arcy Benincosa (48:49):

You Yeah, some guy read that. Some guy, because I had gotten a portfolio review, I hired this very famous woman to review my images, and she ran a very famous blog at the time, that doesn't exist anymore. She wasn't publishing me. And so I paid $500 for her to look at my portfolio. And she said, oh, that's nice. That one's good. Oh, that one's really good. And I said, okay, great. Why aren't you accepting any of my submissions?

Shanna Skidmore (49:17):

Exactly.

D'Arcy Benincosa (49:18):

Just keep submitting. I knew she knew. She just wouldn't tell me, Hey, this one, this is bad because of this one is not working, if you can see. And so then I had a friend review the same portfolio. Two weeks later, I'm like, you got to tell me what am I not seeing? And he goes, and he looks at someone, he's like, oh, D'Arcy, you're better than this. He did it funny. And we had a relationship. He's like, you can never do this again. Do you see how this is off? Do you see that right here? You just did this, makes a photo. So not interesting. And when I saw that, and I got that done, but we will bring it full circle, right before I went to the Sports Illustrated event, and after he did that, I went back and I could see my work in a different way.

(49:57)

And I did not take offense. I mean, a little me was like a little, oh, that hurts. I really liked that shoe. Emotionally, I liked it, but aesthetically it wasn't a great photograph. And then I was able to redo my whole portfolio, print it out, take it to Sports Illustrated. He then did it again. I could have been offended by the ones he didn't like. Sure. He made a pile for ones he didn't, didn't say, I don't like these, but he said, these are the ones that speak to me. And from that, I learned how to even curate my work more. And why did they speak to him? I was endlessly curious about that. Yeah. So yeah, that's where that phrase comes from. It sounds kind of harsh, but it's helped served me very well.

Shanna Skidmore (50:38):

Yeah. I think it's this idea, and I'm not going to say it right, but it's almost like an unbiased observer of your work or a, like you said, even with money at the launch. So often we take that feedback straight to our heart instead of just letting it sit for what it is. And it's not a reflection of who we are. It's just an opportunity to learn something or change something or get better in area. I love, it's like you almost have this separation of D'Arcy as a human and the work that you're doing. While yes, it's all connected, but what saying it's, and it's such a cool way of having a little barrier there almost.

D'Arcy Benincosa (51:17):

And I am still a human. I know after every webinar, which I just did two weeks ago, I will cry. Even if they went well on one of them, I sold $50,000 worth of things, and it was a great webinar. Yeah. I still cry because I get So there were two dudes in there. I don't believe this, or duh. They were just naysayers that got in the masterclass. Right, exactly. It's still emotionally hard to put yourself out like that, and people are going to interpret you in many different ways as an online sales entrepreneur selling something. So after every webinar, I still, I'm like, I can't do anything the rest of the day. I will either be crying or sleeping because it takes so much out of me. But that doesn't mean if it go, doesn't go well. To get to the one where I sold 50, I had to do several where I sold eight. And so it's like you just don't let it hold you back. Yeah.

Shanna Skidmore (52:08):

Yeah. Oh, this is so good. Okay, last quick fire question and then we'll send it off. What are you working on now or one resource that you would like to share?

D'Arcy Benincosa (52:19):

Well, I have a million resources for photographers, but one of the ones that I really, really love is I have this seven day money mindset makeover. And it's really about how to just start telling a different story with money. So one of the things that I love that changed my mind is when I go window shopping with people, a lot of times what I'll see is people like, I couldn't afford that. I couldn't afford that. I couldn't afford that. And what I do, even though I'm not a big spender generally, but if I find something nice, I will invest in it. I say instead of, I can't afford that, I say, that's for me. And I learn that from a very wealthy friend that I met on my journey, and she's like, this just changes everything. That's for me. And it's not about entitlement. I get that, or materialism more stuff to fill this void inside of me.

(53:10)

It's more like allowing you to want what you want without judgment or without immediately closing the door to it. I can't afford that immediately closes the door and I can't afford that could go into, I'm not worth that, or I could sell that or I that. I couldn't teach how she does, or I couldn't grow that, or I couldn't start that business. It's the, I can't. All that does is energetically close the door to any possibility. And like I said, with money, I make it a big old game and I like to be open with it. So when I say that's for me, that just feels good to say, and then if I really want it, then the magician archetype in me goes, all right, Ben and KoSA, how are we going to do that? Let's have fun. Let's figure out, could you offer something new?

(53:59)

Could you do this? What are you feeling drawn to? How could you, and I always find the way to make the thing that I want happen because I keep the door open. I've really learned how to be in open mode, as I like to call it. It's where creativity lies. It's where possibility lies. It's where fun and games, and it's where all of that lies and it's, it cannot in that realm, your old stories of I'm not good with money. That's not for me. People won't like me. Those old stories cannot and are not invited to come play there. Yeah, they will not. They cannot thrive impossibility. Yeah. So you have to kill those old stories off and live in possibility. So I just love that phrase. That's for me, and I have this seven day audio that I can send to. You can put it in the show notes. It's just like a seven day, it's just like 20 minutes in your mind to just help you start priming into possibility.

Shanna Skidmore (54:57):

Yeah. Oh, I love it. Yes. We'll definitely link it below. D'Arcy, thank you so much for sharing your story. You are absolutely so wonderful to listen to. This is so compelling, so encouraging. Thank you for sharing your journey with our listeners, and I want to send it off by asking you, looking back, what would you tell yourself on day one of going into photography?

D'Arcy Benincosa (55:25):

Basically, I think I would say that you made the absolutely right choice, and this is exactly how your life is supposed to go.

Shanna Skidmore (55:33):

I love it. D'Arcy, thank you for joining us. This has been so much fun to spend time with you.

D'Arcy Benincosa (55:38):

Oh, so much fun. Always a pleasure. Shannon, thank you so much.

Shanna Skidmore (55:42):

Hey, wildflower, you just finished another episode of Consider the Wildflowers, the podcast. Head over to consider the wildflowers podcast.com for show notes, resource links, and to learn how you can connect with D'Arcy. Our wildflower of the week is Corrine. Corrine writes like a cozy couch chat with a friend. Shanna, I cannot thank you enough for bringing this podcast into the world. Every episode makes me feel like I just curled up on the couch with a cozy blanket and hot cocoa to chat with a close friend. You truly have a knack for asking you questions and keeping the conversation flowing in such a natural way. Thanks for having such wonderful guests and combos and being such an approachable, enjoyable to listen to host. Thanks for the sunshine. Corrine, I love y'all's reviews. They mean so much. Let's end it today with one of my favorite quotes from Mary Oliver. Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? As always, thank you for listening. I'll see you next time.