Our Take on Relationships, Growth, and Choosing Each Other - with Janelle and Dan

Welcome to our very first episode! We (Janelle & Dan) are diving deep into relationships—what makes them work, what breaks them down, and whether most divorces could actually be avoided.

With 24 years together, kids, businesses, financial ups and downs, and all the real-life challenges that come with long-term love, we bring both practical and intuitive perspectives to navigating relationships. In this episode, we talk about:

💡 Why many relationships struggle and what can be done
 💡 The reality of long-term commitment and how we’ve made it work
 💡 Why women often lead relationship growth
 💡 The impact of kids, finances, and life changes on connection
 💡 The importance of choosing each other every day

We’re not perfect—but we’ve built a strong, lasting relationship by being real, self-aware, and committed to growth. Whether you’re happily coupled, struggling, or somewhere in between, we hope this podcast offers insights, laughs, and real conversations that help you reconnect.

🚀 Bonus: We’re currently offering $99 relationship reconnection sessions—because you shouldn’t have to break the bank to strengthen your relationship.

📩 Got a topic or question for us? Send it our way! And if you have any name suggestions for this podcast, we’d love to hear them!

Book a session:

https://janellebridge.com.au/relationshiprescue/

Transcript

Hello and welcome to our podcast. So it's Janelle here and Daniel. And we don't even know what we're calling the podcast, but we thought, you know what, we'll, we'll, um, cross that bridge when we record an intro. So maybe somebody sent some suggestions. Yeah. Unnamed podcasts. I'm not even sure where would you send it to?

I don't know. We'll fuck around and find out. So. Anyway, what we wanted to talk into today is a little bit as of an introduction to us as a couple, um, and what we're offering. Would you say that summarizes it well enough? It's very simple to say. I guess it's an introductory top thing, I guess. So as you know, from my original podcast, most likely I'm Janelle and I love all things woo woo.

I love the intuitive side of relationships and can read people really well. And Dan is much more practical and logical than I am, but does operate off instinct as well. And the reason that I feel that [00:01:00] we're offering, um, relationship sessions, or relationship reconnection sessions, I guess, is something you can call them, is because we have a lot of experience.

So, 20 odd, 20 odd years, 24. Okay. Hmm. So Dan and I have been together for 24 years. Um, we obviously have a couple of children who are nearly 14 and nearly 12, both of them are neurodivergent quite to the extreme sometimes. So I feel that we have a lot of life experience when it comes to helping couples navigate.

Real life shit. Absolutely. And I think as you go along, you'll find out you've got more than what you expect or more than we even think, because we've, I think we've come from basically being children to, um, young adults, having our own children, babies, businesses. Ups and downs, uh, hospital visits, a lot of, uh, I guess as everyone would have their own issues and we've just been able to work through it [00:02:00] together and, uh, just gained a lot of experience just, and just being together, I think that's a, and we're sticking it out and we, we're not perfect and I'm not here to say that we're perfect, but I know.

Certainly not perfect in any way, but I think what we're good at doing is just working together and staying together. And I think a lot of people have a lot of issues doing that. Yeah. A lot of people just split up. Maybe they can't work together and maybe they do just need a bit of help and they can make it work.

When I was brainstorming while I was driving the other day, I was voice recording some subjects to talk about and one of the subjects that came up, which is a little bit edgy, is that I believe that most divorces can be avoided. And that might not be so now because maybe it's gone on too far, but you know, if things are nipped in the bud and communication is better, has been worked upon and you're both willing to make it work, then I do believe that most divorces can be.

Avoid it. That's not to say anyone should stay in a relationship that is not [00:03:00] beneficial to them or is abusive or anything like that, but there are so many things that can be worked through, provided you both have the same goal, which is staying together and making it work. Yeah, you both have to want it.

You have to choose each other. And by the way, what is the divorce rate? Do you know what the divorce rate is? I know. I don't. I don't care about negative stats, but I know that when I was a marriage celebrant, it was one in three. So when I was doing that full time, it was one in three marriages would end in divorce.

But I can honestly look back at the hundreds and hundreds of couples that I've married and I would say most of them are divorced. And that's not me. That's not a reflection of me. That is a reflection of life. So they might've got married, I started doing about 15 years ago. And, you know, for whatever reason they've separated since then.

And it makes me really sad because I see them on their wedding day, really hopeful, really humid to each other and really excited and declaring their love for one another. And it, and it doesn't work. And I think we can all agree that marriage is fucking hard sometimes life is hard and it does take work.

Like I feel that [00:04:00] the marriages that last are the people that are committed to learning to be better people as individuals, but also committed to growing together. It can't just be one of you either. Yeah. That ratio is wild. It says it'd be nice to be better. The divorce rate is so high. So, and I do agree that a lot of it can be.

I guess rectified, but you have to want to work through it. You have to want to, and you have to be self responsible too. So, you know, if you're sitting here wanting to work about it and your husband's just really not there, then, you know, that's not your responsibility either, but there's lots of things that we can work towards with, but, you know, even if we just look at our school, at our kids at school and how many of their parents are not together.

What? Yeah. Whereas when we were at school, a long, long time ago, it was the other way around. So, you know, it was the exception to the rule if someone Was, you know, their parents weren't together and they stayed at their dad's on the weekends or whatever, whereas now it's really common. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, and I agree what you're saying because like your family, your parents are still together.

Yeah. [00:05:00] My parents are still together and I guess that's what I grew up with. That was just what the norm for me. But the norm isn't the norm these days. No, and again, there's very valid reasons for separating. And, you know, if you are on your second marriage and you're listening to us or, you know, The term broken home gets thrown around, but it's, we want to work towards happy homes and happy relationships.

So we're not here to say, Oh my God, you have to be with the person that you married forever and make it work no matter what, or you failed, but whatever relationship that you're in, it can always be improved. And improving your relationship is going to help the happiness of your family and your children as well.

Yeah, I agree. So we've already gone off topic. I can't even remember what we were talking about before, but you know, I guess coming back to relationships, don't just. Succeed on their own. It's not just like you get married happily ever after because like their life starts happening. Oh my God. And yeah, we were talking about what we bring to the table, so I'm going to share a story really quickly [00:06:00] around.

I was offering relationship connection circles or, um, relationship kind of couple sessions when I had my studio. And I was on a local Facebook group and somebody said, can anyone recommend a relationship counselor, blah, blah, blah. And I jumped in and I said, Hey, I'm not a relationship counselor. I am now I have the qualification, but tick the box.

I tick the box. You tick egg. Congratulations. You tick the, I'll tell you the box, tell you what. I didn't learn much from that box, I tell you, but I. I said, I'm not a relationship counselor, but I'm a relationship coach, and this is what I can help you with, and this is why. So I went into, you know, being in a relationship for this long, um, I have intuitive psychic abilities, which really do help me to kind of see what's actually going on underneath what you're both saying is going on, because sometimes you're not aware.

Um, and I got fucking destroyed online. Like I rang Dan in tears and Dan was like, why do you care? And it really, for some reason shook me. Um, because I was being pushed online and, and I guess really promoted as this person who was dangerous. They said, you're dangerous. You don't have accreditation. You don't have [00:07:00] accreditation.

So what you're doing is dangerous and unethical. Now, the person who led this kind of witch hunt online. I then kind of looked them up and yes, they do have a qualification, but no, they've never been in a long term relationship. They don't have children and they're same sex attracted. And there's different dynamics at play when it comes to the relationship with a man and a woman versus two women, two men.

And I think all of you deserve love, but there's different dynamics at play, you know, And I just thought, fuck you, what qualifications do you have? And it makes me laugh now that I was so shook by someone else's opinion. When I know that life experience and self responsibility and being aware of yourself.

That's where we learn wisdom from it's, and I did the course and it was shit, man. It was, I donated my money and I ticked the boxes. I didn't really learn much. I learned the names for what I do intuitively, if that makes sense. But it doesn't change. It probably doesn't change a thing that you would do anyway.[00:08:00] 

It changes my bank account balance. That's it. It wouldn't change the way that you would try to cancel or help somebody. And let's speak into that for a little bit. So in the counselling courses, it actually says, don't share your own experiences. Keep it about the client. And I get that the client is the focus, right?

Yeah. But I find it so beneficial when someone says to me, Oh my God, that's where I was three years ago. And this is what I did to move forward. So I would never heed to that advice. Cause I think that life experience is the only experience that counts. It's not about discounting what the client's going through.

It's about sharing. I can relate. I guess they're giving realistic hope. A hundred percent. And you know, something that Dan and I were witnessing in this work and knowing that relationships are important and families are so important and all that kind of stuff to us. I was seeing people promoting their relationship shit, basically, that don't have children.

And now we're like promoting how to like bring the spark back. Right. And they don't have kids. And it's like, [00:09:00] dude, once you have kids, are you judging somebody because I don't have children? I'm not judging them, but I'm just joking. We know everyone that has kids will understand that it makes an enormous difference.

What someone tells you to do in your relationship that doesn't have kids becomes funny, doesn't it? It does. And you told someone about this in a session the other day. I used to get Dan's clothes ready for him on the bed, you know, laid out so that he could come home from work and just change into new clothes.

And there'll be food in the oven and all the things. I used to, I used to get you to get me, um, popcorn chicken. Yeah. Could you go get me some chicken? And I love nurturing. So I loved doing that. And he loved being looked after in that way. Can I do that now? If he rang me and said, I'm Millie from Open New York, can you go and get me KFC right now, I'd be like, no.

Well, I wouldn't ring anyway. You know what, you might do it, but the thing is, things change, you don't even, I don't even try to ask for that because I understand. You have to learn to love each other in different ways. And you have to learn to receive love in a different way than what you're used to because you're like, you move down the priority line as much [00:10:00] as you shouldn't, you do, right?

Because you're keeping kids alive. So Dan sometimes does, but most likely doesn't need me to keep him alive. Yeah. Whereas babies needed me to keep them alive. So our priorities have to shift and change. And now that our kids are a bit older, it's like we can move ourselves up the priority list a little bit.

Sometimes when Seb's not in hospital, so over the last 24 years, what have we navigated? I think I mentioned earlier. So I guess we navigated, um, just growing up together. Firstly, just being children, being kids, uh, turned to being adults and yeah, running businesses, working, you working, you're not working, a lot of different dynamics, me working, me not working, negotiating roles is a big thing.

A lot of different dynamics I think. So it hasn't just been one stable way forever. There's been so many different shifts. Yeah. And when you think about it, it's true. There's been so many different shifts over, uh, course [00:11:00] of the 20 odd years where we have gained experience and we've just made it work in, in every dynamic.

So some people might be perfect in one specific dynamic and then maybe if something changes. that can throw them and they might just need a little bit help resetting like that. So I guess we've got a lot of experience in the different dynamics. Many. And that's a really big thing because when things change, you actually then have to roll with that change and not try and get back to what you were.

You have to go, fuck, this is my new reality. How do we make it work the best? As it can right now, if that makes sense. So, you know, we've rolled through things like having our first child, which is once you have a kid, it's never, you can never roll. It's never the same. Once you have a kid, it's once you have the kid, it's like, this is different.

This is like this forever now. But even for us, so like, I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but it's just, it's just different. But even for us, we, you know, when we had Sebi, we were both working full time. And then I was had said, but I got my marriage celebrant business up and running. And I was like, I'm not going and doing that again.

I'm not. And you know, I feel like we both really respect [00:12:00] what we want from life outside of the normal. So I remember we had a huge house and the mortgage was also equally huge. And I said, I'm not going back to that job. I'm not putting my kid in daycare. And you were like, okay, let's sell the house. And it wasn't a, I'm calling the shots, making the decision.

It was like, this is the best family decision for us. Let's fuck off this mortgage and let's downsize. So I feel like it's important because we have the same values as to what's important to us. And I never went back to that job. Actually, I did. I can't, I went back for like one day so I can keep my sick pay and then I, then I quit.

It was a horrible job. It was horrible. Anyway. Um, and then of course you have a second baby and then life gets even more crazy. But so we navigated both of us working full time to one of us working full time and one running a business and the other one starting business and then going, I don't want to plug and work for someone else either.

So then we became really self sufficient. We've also navigated. Having money to not having money, which is probably a big thing. That's huge. And that's one of the reasons, you know, I can say that, like, [00:13:00] I can say a lot of people would struggle to say that, but we've navigated from having money and just doing it easy to doing it hard financially and still having to get through together.

Yeah. And that's like coming up to the, you know, we built businesses and we back each other. I think that's really important. Um, is that I feel like you trust me to make the right decisions with my life and with my business. And therefore our life and our business and I back you as well, you know, we, um, bought a photo booth and that was, you know, we started a daycare company.

This is not a business podcast, but just to give you an idea, we started a daycare company and that went really well. And then we decided time to sell that and we bought a photo booth and then Dan kept fucking buying more photo booths with all the profit that we were making and we ended up with 13, 12.

We had 30 in the end, didn't we? Nah, 12. I thought nah, it was an odd number. Can we come back to that? I'm going to make you a bet on that. We had 13. No worries. No worries. It's a free win for me. I think it is. I feel like we had an odd number. Anyway. Next [00:14:00] episode, you can update the listeners on who we won.

We had a lot of photographs, we had a lot of stuff and then COVID came and it was like, huh, you've got no money. You're fucked basically. Wasn't it? Yeah. Fuck you. Like, you know, that job that was coming in, you know, and I remember it, we spent like 5, 000 on supplies because we were coming into busy season.

And then it was like, all events are paused indefinitely. And we were like, what, wait, what? And that continued for essentially 18 months in Victoria. And that was terrifying for me, it was absolutely terrifying for me because I had my marriage celebrant stuff as a backup, we had this big events company and Dan was playing in the band and we couldn't do any of those things, like, we couldn't do any of it.

And we, we made it work, didn't we? I was happy the COVID come at the time, I guess to have a bit of a break, but eventually it hits you. It's like a, hold on, hold on a second. Yeah. Well, that money you had saved up is gone. Gone, gone. And getting [00:15:00] money out of your super and just, just because we're not very financially driven people.

We're not very financially savvy. I'm just going to be honest. No, we're not driven by finances. We're driven by freedom. Correct. But money brings some freedom too. Yeah. So we're trying to balance. Yeah. And so it, it was actually like, we look back and we're kind of glad that it happened because it put us in the right direction in some ways, but sometimes we get stuck looking back and being like, wow, wow, where would we be if that didn't happen?

But I was stressed. You were stressed. It was pretty stressful. Doing that amount of events and managing staff and things like that. Anyhow, so then I, um, you know, during this time that we're running a really busy business, I came home and said to Dan, I enrolled in psyche development. You're like, what the fuck?

Why? Because I want to, and I feel like you're very tolerant of me doing things because I want to because in not in a selfish way, but because it doesn't have to be a purpose. Cause it sounds interesting and lucky I [00:16:00] did cause I'd been doing that for about 18 months. COVID came and then I, um, decided to just offer some free readings.

I wanted to give back and then I was really good at them. And then I, I said to Dan, I'm not going back to the photography, so I'm not doing it. I'm doing this. Do you think that your, your readings is a snowballed into a relationship type thing where people would come to you for relationship advice? Yeah, for sure.

So the dynamic again shifted because I was working a lot and you were looking after the kids and all that kind of stuff as well. And yeah, people were coming for relationships. And what I noticed was I could give people a totally different perspective on what was going on because intuitively. They would just be stuck in, like, my husband has said this, or my husband is doing this, and what I can do with my psychic gifts, and also, I guess, counseling gifts, is look at that from an eagle eye view and see what's actually going on.

And then, a lot of the time, it's not what you think that's going on, it's something totally different. You're so stuck in your corner, you're backed into a corner, all [00:17:00] you can see is what's directly in front of you, when as I look at that from, like, an eagle eye view, I can say, okay, I can see that this needs to shift and this needs to shift as well.

So, I love the juicy relationship stuff. What I hate is like, when am I going to get married? When am I going to meet the one? We won't talk about that this episode. I don't think, but let's not speak about soulmates and twin flames and all that kind of shit. That's I hate that in the psychic world. So yeah, it has really been a segue into relationship work.

And when I had my studio, I was doing a fair bit with couples in there and then my studio got demolished. That's fun for apartments. But, um, it's something that I really want to do together because I feel like we bring a different. dynamic together than just me. I think that's, that's fair enough. Like, cause the question would be like, what am I here for?

What are you, what am I here for? Is it the bounce ideas off? Is it just from another perspective? Would people feel more comfortable having as a couple talking to another couple or talking to [00:18:00] one person, a guy having another guy there? Uh, all I know is that I want to help and, um, if I can help, if I'm here, if I can help, then yeah, I'm happy to, uh, give my suggestions and I think we work together, bouncing ideas off each other and all that kind of stuff.

There's no doubt that you're going to do the majority of the talking, but I do listen. He does listen. And I feel like Dan is very practical and very logical and very strategic as well. So, um, Very realistic too. As you know, if you've listened to me before, I, um, I believe in the best all the time. I see the positive most of the time until, unless I'm hungry, then I'm like, everything is shit.

You are terrible when you're hungry. You suck when you're hungry. I'm horrible when I'm hungry. I think I've said it before. I said, if you acted like you were hungry all the time, we definitely wouldn't be married. It says. I always say I couldn't, like Dan always says, go and survive. He loves survival. And I feel like the social side and even the physical side of me, I'm like, I don't want to be good at.

But I, like everyone would vote me off the first week cause they'd be like, she's a fucking [00:19:00] bitch. Like, it's not my fault. It's actually condition people with their blood sugar spikes. Our son is similar. Annabelle, our daughter, she's pretty chill. Yeah. But yeah, Seb definitely has your hunger or hang, hangry genes.

Yeah. So I'm pretty positive, pretty like, um, Look on the bright side. And then I feel like Dan can be the polar opposite of that, but not so much in a negative way. I mean, sometimes, but the realistic side, if that makes sense as well. So it's almost that grounded approach as well. So I feel that we work really well together.

And I feel like, you know, it's, let's face it, it's probably going to The women listening to this podcast, because women always go first. And that's something we might talk about in another podcast is that, you know, I will often have women come to me and say, I'm growing in my house. My husband's not doing the work.

Who's not growing. I'm like, yep. It's the women's job to, to grow first, to grow first, because we are the ones that are like, okay, I want more connection or I want [00:20:00] more time with you, or I want us to communicate better. Like we are the ones that is in charge of that connection, if that makes sense as well.

And so we always are going to go first. So if you're a woman listening to this. Totally get it. It might be hard to go home and convince your husband to come and see some crazy psychic lady to talk about your relationship because I don't know what, if I came home, it's a bit hard because you trust what I do and respect what I do, but like, if I came home and said to you, let's go to a relationship counselor, she's a woman, she's got psychic abilities.

Like, how would you actually feel about that? You can be super honest. Dan's medicine, like Dan's medicine is the truth in terms of thinking. Yeah. Yeah. It would feel a little bit weird, I think. It'd feel weird, and I feel like there's maybe a part of the masculine that might be like, she's gonna take my wife's side.

I think a lot of people would probably think that. Yeah. Which, we don't, it's really important that we don't take sides. Absolutely. We will call that really bad behaviour, and say, meh, I wouldn't be happy with that either. But we're not here [00:21:00] to take sides. I mean, what's the end goal? The end goal is to get the information.

Untangle it and try to give some people some practical things that can improve their relationship one step at a time. Yeah, absolutely. And this is the baby steps, baby steps. Absolutely. And it's like clarifying your goals is really important. We did a session the other day and it's like, what do you want?

And what do you want? And we need to make sure you both want the same thing. So then it's like, you can almost. Almost get rid of all the shit that's happened up until that point and focus on how are we going to get from here to the point that we want to be at, which is connected, which is communicating properly.

So I feel that we bring that really well rounded approach to that. And for me, if I'm looking for a coach, when it comes to my business relationship or my own personal development, I want to know that they have an understanding of what I'm walking through. So this is why we decided to do this podcast and kind of talk about where we've gained understanding for perhaps what you're walking through right now.

So if you have neurodivergent kids. [00:22:00] I see you. We see you, you know, and Dan and I were talking about this before Dan likes facts, whereas I just go, I don't know, we'll do it. I said, you know, even the fact that Dan's sister has three kids, right? They go to bed on time, don't they? They're she's like, kids got to go to bed seven o'clock or whatever.

They're all in bed, tucked up. We've never had that luxury. We've never had the luxury of getting our kids to bed at a decent hour. So again, like. And if anybody can give us some tips on that, we'll please send that in as well. They're teenagers now, pretty much. They're going to bed when they want it. Um, but so for, you know, if you've got neurotypical kids and you have that tightly run ship as your home.

That advice of connect when the kids are in bed is so easy, or have a date night and let them have a sleepover at their grandparents. There were times when our son would leave our side, we'd drop him off for a date night and he would like hold onto our legs just all of a sudden. It's happened. It did happen.

Yeah. And so, [00:23:00] you know, we know that sometimes it's not about romantic weekends away and date nights and all of that. I'd say for us, like, I can't fucking remember the last time I went on a date night. Like literally. We've been through a ringer recently. Well, we've been in hospital last couple of weeks.

But we still find ways to connect in the chaos. So it's not about like wishing your circumstances were different or like blaming the kids or needing an escape. I think this is the key, actually. It's not about creating an escape for your life where you can connect. Cause what's that you're going to connect once a month, once a week.

It's like, how do you find connection? In the shit fuckery that you're sitting in, in life in that moment, would you agree you're nodding? They can't see, you nod. Yeah, I'm nodding. I'm nodding. We might not agree on everything, but, uh, yeah, I definitely agree on that. But reiterating, we're not perfect. We're not coming from a space of we're perfect.

We're figured it out. We have all the answers. We're coming from a space of, Hey, [00:24:00] we might've navigated it and we can give you guidance. I also feel that we're coming from the space of really innocent and pure intentions in that like It's really sad when people break up when they probably don't need to.

And especially for me, it's really sad when people break up because they're wearing masks. I think especially when there's families, when there's families involved. Yeah, it's heartbreaking. And it's heartbreaking to be in a toxic relationship. It's heartbreaking to be in a relationship that's disconnected as well.

No doubt. I'm thinking of it from the children's point of view. Yeah. That would be very sad for them. And I know, understandably, there's going to be situations where It can't be avoided. I think that maybe we're just here just to try to help if it can be avoided. Yeah. If it can be avoided. People that are willing to give it a go, I'd recommend them talk to a lot of people to try to help their relationship or save their family.

Yeah. And it might be us that can help, it might be somebody else. So whether they stumble across us and we can help them, if we can, that'd be fantastic. Yeah. But, uh, if it is us, if it isn't us and they're giving it a go, that's still good as well. But at least, at least they're giving it a [00:25:00] go. And I feel like when a couple turns up to a session, like I just feel so honored that they've chosen both of them to say yes and show up and like, tell us their secrets, you know, it's, we, we totally understand that it's hard to talk about relationship issues.

And I also want to speak about this and there's so many podcast topics that we could talk about within this podcast, but maybe we'll save them. Please be mindful of who you speak about your relationship to. So if you're speaking to a counselor or a coach and they're a trusted person, fantastic. Speaking about relationship can be so healing to getting clarity and to getting strategies to move forward.

All you need to do is jump in a mom's group on Facebook and see the toxic advice that is dished out around relationships. You know, you'll see things like, ah, you know, and this woman probably had a really hard day with her kids. My husband comes home from work, he's been working 14 hours, and like, he just sits down on the couch, takes his shoes off, there's dishes in the sink, he didn't even fucking help me, like, he's so fucking lazy, I can't do it all on my own, and these mums will pile on and [00:26:00] be like, divorce him.

He's so lazy. Like, that is so not good enough, you know. Other examples, I guess I've seen as, you know, new, new mom going to have a shower and the husband constantly coming in every time she has a shower with the baby that's screaming because she's breastfeeding and saying here, the baby only wants you.

And again, the parents are piling on, the mothers are piling on saying it's his kid too. He needs to learn. I'm like, that's just bullshit. And he's being blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Right. I look at that from an eagle eye perspective where I go, okay, he needs to learn. Yes. How to placate this baby. I totally understand.

But he also has no fucking idea what he's doing. He's been chucked in the deep end, right? So he's here, his baby who he loves so much is screaming. He doesn't know how to comfort her. He knows that mom's boob will comfort her. So he's like, fuck, I've got to give her to mom. I don't want my baby crying. Why?

And I understand that it's really fucking frustrating because we're just trying to wash our hair, right? But it's, again, it's that believe in the pure intentions of your partner. He is [00:27:00] trying his best. How can you help him be a little bit better in that situation? So again, going a little off topic, but you only have to read through a Facebook moms group to see the absolute toxic advice that is being given out.

And what we can do is be like, see, I'm fucking right. Because all of these people agree with me, instead of speaking to someone who can help you see both sides, it's never about excusing shit behavior, but it's about actually witnessing like. Where you're the problem as well, because it's rarely one person.

Who's the problem. I'm not in any Facebook moms group, but you know, like, and we, we pick and choose who we speak to about things. Right. Like. You could, they would have one girlfriend who's like a Scorpio and is like, yeah, fuck that person. Like, no way. I'm totally on your team. And you might have another friend who's a Pisces who'll be like, how's that making you feel?

So depending on your mood and what kind of response you want is who you choose to go to. What I want to say to you is be sacred about who you speak to around your relationship issues. [00:28:00] Because you need someone who is not speaking through the words of their wounds and through the lens of their wounds.

You want to speak to someone who can have a look at the whole situation and believe in the best, the best in you and your, and your husband and your wife. Partner, you know, to see the way forward, if that makes sense as well. So I feel like we both have that really non judgmental way forward of the way forward.

Do you know what I mean? I feel like that's a quality of character. We wouldn't be doing it if we didn't think that we were good people to at least for somebody to talk to. Yeah. So. Yeah. Ticking that box. Yeah. So as you can see, pretty easy to listen to, hopefully. I go on tangents and then Dan brings it back to where it needs to be.

You know, you just, you go blah, blah, blah for a while. And obviously they're in this drop in one or two lines. But I feel like, but it's good. You're good at filling up the space. I feel like, you know, [00:29:00] having the two that having, having husband and wife there in front of you can be. A really relaxing standpoint, you know, for a husband and wife sitting in front of us.

And as I said, we're not perfect by any means as well. And we'll tell. We will. I think some of the things that are relatable. Some of the things that we'll probably advise people on is things that we need to continue working on as well. I think, yeah, it'd be maybe good for people to see, understand that as well.

But yeah, I'm not sitting back judging people. No, no, not at all. Because we are far from perfect. Absolutely. But yeah, we have lived through a lot of it and, um, we choose each other. And maybe if people choose each other, then we can help them, uh, guide them in the right direction for that. Mm hmm. With the right intentions.

Yeah. And I feel like part of the, part of what I'm really good at saying is, is what you actually want and helping you both clarify what you actually want. Because a lot of times in relationships we're saying things like, I want to feel this, or you don't make me feel loved, or you don't make me feel this.

And it's like, well, what do you fucking need to feel that way? Like, what is it that you [00:30:00] actually are asking for? Because neither of you, even if your psyche is fuck, even if you've done my development courses, you're not there to read each other's minds. Communication is obviously going to be key for probably everything.

Communication can save relationships, marriages, friendships. Work all of it. So I reckon that it may be our role is to help people first and foremost is to help people communicate Mm hmm, and that's not it would be the first thing that you will try to work through and that's not easy for people to learn How to communicate I think that's really important because there's so many blocks to communication So it's not about reading a book and being like I think I know how to communicate better It's about like yeah, you're right.

I don't want to broach that subject because I'm fucking terrified of being rejected Yeah. Or I feel embarrassed to ask you about this. So it's about kind of stepping outside of what you're scared of and getting vulnerable because that's where connection happens. Is there anything else you want to add?

I'm good. You're good. I'm going to add that [00:31:00] we have 99 sessions available at the moment as we kickstart. We also understand that financial security and financial stress can really aggravate and add to disconnection within couples as well. So I feel like our aim even moving forward is to keep this affordable for people.

I feel like you shouldn't be struggling and fighting about money and then have to pay more money to, or lots of more money to. Work it out. I think that's really important. Um, so you should book in, I will drop the link underneath the episode description, and we'd love to see you. You should, if you feel like you need to book in, feel free to book in.

Absolutely. They do need to look, everyone can benefit from this. Let's be real. And let's talk about that for a second as well. Who, who do we want to work with? I'm open to working with people who are separated and want to make their way back together. I'm open to working with people who are happy. They just wanna connect even a little bit more, you know, you don't wanna wait.

I think that's probably key is you don't wanna wait till you're in crisis [00:32:00] to try and fix things. That's a good way to look at it as well. Yeah. If you are fighting over the same things, 'cause you know there's always cycles that we have in that same fucking cycle that we can't get out of. Maybe you need to book him with us, because I guess you could probably think that the majority of people will be like on the pre, on the precipice and like they're just about broken up and they're like, this is the last resort kind of thing.

Mm-hmm . So. Yeah, getting in a bit earlier as well, even if things are going well, then maybe, uh, open up a new, a few new things that could improve things even more. That's going to be technically good. The quicker you catch it, the quicker it's going to be to repair. But I, in the end, you Like I know from my point of view, I just, I don't want to work with people that choose each other.

They want to be together. Absolutely. It's going to be hard. We're not here to convince anyone to stay together if that's not what they want. Yeah. Deep down if they were going to, if they truly want to be together and if we can help, I guess, improve that relationship or give them some tools, that's, that's where I want to be.

Yeah, absolutely. Whether they are, yeah, sit [00:33:00] on the precipice or going well. I want people that are choosing each other and want to stay together. Or oscillating between the two because we've all been there. Yeah, have a good day and then you're like, I'm fucking done. Everyone's uttered those words, I don't care how long you've been married, you've definitely said those words to each other at some point.

And again, We can love, you know, bringing more playfulness is, is part of it. So you don't have to worry that sitting in a counseling session is going to be like us sitting there wearing reading glasses and taking notes. Like we make it easy to talk to you. There's always a few swear words dropped.

There's the going to be real life experience that we talked to you about as well. And it's almost like you catch up with your wise friends. It's not like a clinical discussion where we're judging you and being like, they fucked up. We would say that to you anyway, rather than to ourselves afterwards. But it's a very low key, casual, I want to say life changing relationship, changing experience.

We just need to give it a name. I know, fuck. What are we going to [00:34:00] call it? I don't know. It's all really corny. There's lots of corny names for relationship help. What, what's the corniest? I was going to say something that's not very nice. I'm not going to say that. I don't know, like I just, you know, there's a relationship rescue, relationship revival.

Like it doesn't really sum us up. The No Bullshit Relationship Therapist, I don't know. That's too many letters. Too many words. That's too many letters. Mmm. Reconnect? I don't know. Maybe we should brainstorm off it, but if you have anything, let me know. It'd make for a better podcast. I don't know. So are we sending this out intro free then, because we don't know what the hell we're going to call it.

Possibly. Yeah. I think we should just send it. Send it. You're turning into Manny Jen like me. Just send it. Just send it. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's important that we get this out there. Like this is a lot. This work is alive for us. It's something that we feel can really positively impact those around us, those that work with us and your families and your communities as well.

So we look forward to working with [00:35:00] you. Have a good