More than just mindfulness

Anxiety

October 27, 2018 Season 1 Episode 9
More than just mindfulness
Anxiety
Chapters
More than just mindfulness
Anxiety
Oct 27, 2018 Season 1 Episode 9
Robert Mitchell
Insight into anxiety. What is it? Why do we have it? and what can we do to manage it?
Show Notes Transcript

In which Robert explains what anxiety is, why we feel anxious and teaches some practices that help us regulate our anxiety, manage our stress and calm our mind. He explains how we can train ourselves to make these practices intuitive without the need to find the time in our busy lives.

Speaker 1:
0:01
Meditation was it initially designed to give us insight into our inner experience, which is basically thoughts and emotions. It's purpose was to provide what's known as clarity in the eastern traditions, Buddhism and Hinduism and understanding of the nature of the self in relation to everything else. And as such there's nothing comparable and it, and it is having a marked effect. A lot of very successful people use meditation and mindfulness practices as performance enhancement process and as a way of coping with the stress that they're under. The stress and anxiety side of meditation is the benefits of it are actually a side effects. Um, but it's so significant side effects and it's significant enough to be measured empirically with in controlled studies. So you take two groups, one group, you might teach them something just so that there's no placebo effect. You in the early days before everybody knew what meditation was, what they do is sit people down and get them to do things like think about a certain thing for 15 minutes.
Speaker 1:
1:29
And those people were told that that was meditation and because it wasn't in the public domain, they believed it. So any placebo that results and what a placebo is is yeah, when you're given a tablet with nothing in it, but you get better anyway. And that's a very real effect. So they were able to measure that against people who really did meditate. And you can see the difference in their stress levels. Stress is an easy thing to measure, can measure it in a number of ways. There's stress chemicals in the body. You're looking at people's heart rate, resting heart rate, and you're looking at things like working memory. And so you can do a a pretty accurate analysis of stress. We've already covered stress in this mini series want. What stress is, is the body's response to a perceived threat. So it's very important to understand what emotion is, to understand what anxiety is and what emotion is. Is Our body motivating us towards a certain behavior? It wants us to do something and, and there's a whole range of emotions and here's where we can see the consequences of our genetic inheritance is in our emotional responses.
Speaker 1:
2:57
Because to live in the modern world's, to do the things you need to do in the modern world, actually emotion gets in the way, which is why certain non empathic people are so successful. So if you're looking at the most competitive environments, elite sportsman, successful politicians, successful business people, empathy isn't an obvious behavioral outcome. They're focused on winning in a nutshell. And then so their, their emotional state gets suppressed in order to achieve that if they have an emotional state. And then there's a prevalence of personality disorders where people actually just fail the display. Any emotion. And you can see this when you meet these sorts of people, they're amiable, uh, friendly. Um, Eh, they're capable of speaking about pretty much any subject. But there are actual responses and the things that they do, you can see that as a human element missing so that that's kind of what it looks like to, to benefit materially in the modern world.
Speaker 1:
4:18
And then on the other hand, we've all got emotions. Every, all the rest of us have emotion. And those emotions often seem to conflict with the ideal behavior or responses. And the reason for that is because they're not over the modern world. Our emotions are a product of our genetic inheritance. So human beings are designed to live in small groups of about 150 at the most, uh, lifetime family groups where everybody collaborates. And the reason everybody collaborates, he's actually, if that doesn't happen, if there's conflict in the group, they're not going to survive. Right. Cause there's enough, there's enough conflict with nature. Yeah. Nature's a dangerous place to be. If you have internal conflict in the group, your chances of success of vastly diminished. So you've got this collaborative group where everybody cares for each other. There are no secrets. There's no politics. In order to have politics, you need to have secrets, but there's no walls.
Speaker 1:
5:33
Yeah, there are. They live in the jungle on Ray's rafts or tiny little huts where you can hear every single word and the life's completely different. There's connection to nature and there's connection to each other. If you look at society and culture as a set of trends, to my mind, the most prevalent one is fragmentation. So I know is fragmentation of families. I know is fragmentation of communities. You know, hands up. Anybody who's lived in the same place their entire life, okay, get the picture. We're, we're a fragmented group, but it doesn't matter where you go. And I teach in big organizations in central London. Nobody's gonna put their hand out like one in every 30, something like that. That fragmentation works against our emotional needs. We're not getting our emotional needs fulfilled as human beings. We're not getting that, that steep sense of connection and solidarity and care and love and affection and the capacity to overlook people's idiosyncrasies and all of these things that are so human.
Speaker 1:
6:49
And this isn't tribalism. This is more like family ism. And if you look at the places in the world where a higher proportion of people live to be over a hundred, the single most obvious outcome is social cohesion. Okay? So let's look at anxiety. Anxiety is, uh, a prediction of the bar, the emotional brain that there's a threat in the future usually, or that there's a continual low level threat. Because fear is, you know, fear. You run out the door, okay. Anxiety, you're still in the room. That's the only difference. This results in a thing called chronic anxiety, which is something that I suffered from for awhile back in 2010 I had look at it now and it was clear case of generalized anxiety disorder. I wake up in the morning, I'd have a symptoms of anxiety, which is a physical sense of distress. Somewhere in the body.
Speaker 1:
7:52
Go to bed at night, it'd be still there. It was a, it was a feeling in my throat. You know, that kind of choked up you feeling you get when you lose someone you love. And it was there all the time. And I suppressed it by keeping busy by exercise until that ran out. Um, by drinking too much, until that became a problem and all of the things that people do to try and suppress how they feel in modern society. And eventually I ran out of methods of suppression for how I felt and became overwhelmed and couldn't go into work one day because I was so angry. But that's, and that's absolutely not an unusual thing. People can see their lives, their trend of their lives and their emotional state leading themselves towards that. Or they'll have experienced it or somebody around them will have experienced it.
Speaker 1:
8:41
And what's going on there is the emotional brain's saying, nope, this is all wrong. This isn't right you, you, you, you, you got to be doing is looking for deep, meaningful connection. You, you need to connect your need to not spend your time competing with, with a lot of non empathic people for a new losery goal that irrespective of how approach you get to it never actually fulfills you. But I wasn't taking any notice. And the problem is with the emotional brain, it's only got one way of letting us know what's going on. And that's the feelings in our body. It's a one way street in motions to the thinking brain. You can't say, oh actually I think that emotions a little bit inappropriate, so stop. It doesn't work. So it's a one way conversation
Speaker 1:
9:37
as a brilliant scientist whose name eludes me at the moment, he wrote a book called anxious name will come to me in a minute and he clarifies that there's no direct connection between the Amygdala, which is the part of the brain that's largely responsible. Uh, Joseph Ledoux dukes. Yeah, that's his name. There's no direct connection between the Amygdala, which is the part of the brain that's responsible for emotion and the parts of the brain where working memory operates. And I am in my working memory right now. Yeah, it remembers the last thing I just said and it's, it actually hasn't got a clue what I'm going to say names, but it's keeping tabs of what's happening in, in my present moment environment. And there's no connection to the emotional brain, so I can't influence it directly to influence the emotional brain. What we need to do is intervene at the level of the body, the emotional brain in there, into the body and the body's going, don't do this, do that. Feel like this. Connect with this person. Avoid that person is it's constant messaging and it puts you reliable. If you read about successful people,
Speaker 1:
10:59
often I am. I have to make difficult choices and they're left with choices that are known as wicked problems. What a wicked problem is, is something that's so complex that there isn't a right and wrong solution. There's only better and worse solutions. Yeah, it's a lot of social problems are wicked problems. They're not. This is a technical term on a lot of life problems are wicked problems because there were so many pros and cons I would do. I'd move here too. I get this career. Do I make these changes in my life that these successful people often come back to say it's all down to gut feel. What's happening there is you're delegating a certain amount of responsibility to your emotional Brian for making a choice in your life has two effects. One is it's actually a little bit more reliable than what we perceive to be thought and a lot of situations, I won't go into that so much, but the other benefit you get from it is you are then aligned the you that you are and your emotional brain are both pulling in the same direction and that is the recipe for success because when there's a conflict, tell you what's going to happen.
Speaker 1:
12:20
You're going to procrastinate, you're going to perfection eyes, you're going to avoid or you're just going to have an emotional response to your experience that stopped you achieving what you want to achieve. It's all of it isn't about doing whatever you feel, but it's about taking how you feel into account. So that's how to approach anxiety externally. That's what it is and that's the things that we can do to reduce our anxiety is actually make choices that take care of emotional needs into account when we make the choice. Yeah. Often, often that choice is made for you by new house, buy a new car, meet the one your emotional brains decided and you're just going to try out a lot of reasons why you're going to do this thing. But for many choices, things like, do I stay in this job? Do I move to another career?
Speaker 1:
13:22
Do I do, I moved somewhere else? You want to be aligned. So that's the external perspective of managing your anxiety is look at the choices that you make. Get the know your emotional experience and your emotional brain until you find what you both want to achieve and work on that. And it might not be what your rational thinking, Brian thinks is the right thing. But for something it'd be sustainable in a difficult world, you need to be aligned with it. Okay, so now to the inside and what we want to do is this. We know when our anxiety is inappropriate. Anxiety is not always inappropriate. Sometimes it's quite correct if it becomes overwhelming, deal with the reality of it rather than try and overcome it. But let's say it's inappropriate. What we want to be able to do is manage it. What we want to be able to do is intervene in the physiological responses and to to that end, I teach two sorts of techniques. One is stress management, which is where we're dealing with the body directly and the other is emotional regulation. So for emotional regulation there's something that I've been teaching for quite a while and there's an app for that and what the APP does is it helps you breathe in a certain rhythm.
Speaker 1:
14:54
What this is actually doing when you do it is fundamentally changing your physiology. Adopt. I don't do demos in these classes, but if you come on the course, I'll do you a demo as well as that. I've got one on my youtube channel so you can see me downloading, installing and using an app and you can see the physiological change that results from using this particular breathing rhythm. Now what this is is actually an ancient set of techniques that are known as Prana Yama. Now, only 50% of people notice a change with a different APP. I can try it out on people. And I'm noticing the physiological change and what the physiological changes is a thing called coherence. It's synchronization of your breath and your heart rate, and generally speaking, they're not synchronized. But after doing two minutes of this for something like 95% of us, what's happened is we brought our heart rate and our breathing into a synchronized state.
Speaker 1:
16:06
So what we're doing is intervening in our physiology and what that does is that sends a different signal. So the body's sending us a signal and let's say that signal is be afraid, be afraid. What we're doing is intervening and we're changing the signal and the signal becomes everything's okay. Everything's okay. 50% of you will notice a change and the other 50% one, but it works for everybody. And what I'll do is I'll explain to you how you get it into your life. Because the thing is about all of these techniques, it becomes another thing to do and then you place the significance on on it. Let's say you're anxious. This is the thing that will stop me becoming anxious. And so then it becomes a big deal. And then when you don't do it, you the inner critic pipes up and you get, we get this tangled web all because we've nominate.
Speaker 1:
17:01
It's something to be important. So what we need to be able to do is get it in our lives in a way that's simple and easy and frictionless. And then from that were able to go in another practice. And then where I use that practice and our day to day, and it's, it's life changing. Okay? So what the practice is, many of you will know is the four, six breaths. Now this is one of many Prana Yama as there are others that are as useful and they're all useful in different ways. One day I'll do an entire retreat on Pranayama. I use this because it's the most accessible. I did it last night when I went to bed. I wanted to get to sleep and I knew that my mind was going to be busy because I had to get up particularly early this morning. Notice what happens when you know you need to get up early. You know that the mind's going to get in the way of that monkey mind battle. The monkey mind. I did for six breaths. I did another uh, relaxation sent, neat, drifted off, and then of course I woke up at the crack of dawn. Well before it was light and same thing, exactly the two same practices went straight back to sleep again. So I've actually managed to
Speaker 1:
18:20
do this long enough for it to be really effective in the situation where back in the day I would have just got up because I knew I wouldn't have been able to get back to sleep again. So I've been woken up at four 30, five o'clock okay. So when we're breathing in and out, these are the key things to keep in mind. Your body will decide how much air you breathe in and how much air you breathe out. You don't need to do that. All your doing is deciding that you're going to be breathing in during the four seconds in breath and breathing out during the six seconds. Outbreath the best place to focus on is the movement of the belly. Just at the top of the belly, the belly meets the chest. You're noticing that movement there. And this is a good way to begin the four, six breaths because it's a frictionless experience. Noticing that movement top of the belly, just where it meets the chest and you're just noticing that movement rising and falling. Now, if you notice that for a little while, then when you start this, and we'll do this for a couple of minutes, what you need to do is count. And the way it account is one 1002 1003 1004 one yeah, thousand and when you're counting out, count the thousands down a six one 1002 1003 1004 1001 1002 1003 1004 1005 1006 1000 we just do that for a couple of minutes.
Speaker 1:
20:06
Just noticing that movement. So while you breathe in, you know the senior debt rising, when you breathe out, you know seeing it full name, you're better off with your tongue, up against the back of your teeth. How are you breathing in? In and out from the nostrils.
Speaker 2:
21:02
[inaudible]
Speaker 1:
21:53
so that's a couple of minutes. That's enough. That's all you need. That makes the change that moves your coherence from probably something like 30 or 40% to 100% so don't take my word for a single thing, right? You'd get to try everything out yourself. What this is is a Chinese menu, so if you go into a Chinese restaurant and I give you this huge menu of the size of a tabloid newspaper and it's got all of these dishes on it. If you were to ask the restaurant to which ones were nice, he'd say they're all nice. Yeah, okay. All of the techniques that I teach work, but as we know, some people are going to light crispy beef and other people are going to prefer crispy Paul Prom bowls and other people are going to like vegetable chair, Mine. All right, so this is the same with meditation. There's all these techniques you get to choose.
Speaker 1:
23:02
I'm just the restaurateur, I'm giving you each a little recipe and you find the ones that work for you and you just forget the rest. When we go into a Chinese restaurant, you've got this big menu and although you know what you like and what you don't like, you, you go through it or just to see if there's something new. So that's an important thing. Once you find some techniques that work for you, then go through the techniques and find what works for you now or next or a new thing or a more useful thing. So it's times times to use this, you can use it when you wake up in the morning, hands up who presses snooze in the morning when they wake up. Okay. That's your new meditation time. If you can't get any other sort of meditation and it do the four, six breaths, so it now becomes four, six breasts time.
Speaker 1:
23:57
Neat, neat, neat, neat. For six breaths time, everybody else. There's a time between when you wake up and when you get out of bed as for six breaths time and all you're doing is becoming comfortable with the practice so it becomes useful to you. Yeah, you need to practice it enough so that it becomes intuitive and then when do you use it? In your day. If you're feeling anxious and you want to reduce your anxiety, this is the single most effective non-drug or big activity oriented thing that you can do. So exercise will reduce your anxiety for a while having a glass of wine, we'll reduce your anxiety for a while. We've got lots and lots of things that we can do and we can't always do them. And there's an expectation on you deliver and you can feel your physiology telling you get out of this place, run away.
Speaker 1:
24:56
And instead what you need to do is, is performed first thing called performance anxiety, which many people experience. And so what do you do? You do the four six press. If you haven't practiced it, it won't be as useful. Nowhere near as useful as if you've made it an intuitive activity. So you can even do this while you're in a difficult situation. Regulate your breath. If you've got a couple of minutes, bring yourself back into balance and then don't take my word for it. Monitor your performance. Notice what happens in your life when you use these techniques and what happens when you don't write it down in a journal, have a look at it, do these are life skills and these are the things that everybody can use to benefit their lives in a multitude of different ways. And so then it might be the, actually no, this doesn't work for me, but then there are other techniques and I'm going to teach us another one in a second.
Speaker 1:
25:57
Okay, so that's kind of an indication of what it is and what it does, why it does it. So there's this coherence, which is a big deal. The other thing that happens is because we're breathing out for six seconds instead of four, we're spending more time in relaxation and stress breathing in. We're in stress mode, breathing out, we're in relaxation mode. So we're moving our body towards relaxation as well as that we're breathing more efficiently. Oxygen transfer improves all of these things. Three things. They're the keys to rebalancing your physiology in two minutes. And then the other thing we can do is relax. We'll do a meditation now. So this is a meditation that I devised. It's called the four tenors meditation. And it starts off. What we want to do is relax our eyes. And of course if you go to the person in the street and you say, relax your eyes by, I'll give you a quizzical look because we don't know how to do that. We don't. We're not getting the physiological feedback from our eyes and we haven't learned the skill. So what we need to do is to learn that skill. And the way to do it is to take your hand palm of your hand like that and place it very close to your forehead without actually touching your forehead.
Speaker 1:
27:19
And what you'll notice is the warmth of your palm and a tiny little tingling on the forehead.
Speaker 1:
27:27
So if you place your hand back down, wherever it's comfortable, and notice now that there's a sensation you get in physiological feedback from your forehead, we now want to help our body to relax. So there's two keys to this key number one, first thing to do, place your elbows by your sides. Most people elbows are in front of them. And then so we're leaning forward and were active. I in a lot of muscles around the back and sides of the neck and the shoulders and so on. And then notice your skull balanced on top of your spine. Find the spots, maximum comfort. Just doing those two things reduces our stress. Stress and anxiety are very, very closely connected. And what's happening there is we're beginning to intervene in our stress, beginning to intervene and our anxiety and another physiological trek tongue up against the sharp part of the teeth. Just gently and contact with the sharp part of the teeth. Also suggest you keep it there throughout the exercise. And again, noticing your breath this time. Ideally the sensation of the breath in the nostrils. You'll notice the coolness of the breath and the warmth of the outbreath.
Speaker 1:
29:23
And so now reconnecting with the forehead. Notice you're still aware of the sensations in the forehead and I'll begin the meditation and ended with a bell. What were you going to do? Is gently relax. Forehead on successive outbreath. Relax the eyebrows, relax the eyes and relax the cheeks, forehead, eyebrows, eyes, cheeks. What we do is we do that on the out breath. So we're breathing in normally breathing out, relaxing the eyes. So when you're doing this as a practice, what you do is count the number of outbreath you relax the eyes for about 10 outbreath. Tom Still gently and contact with the sharp part of the teeth. Relaxing the mouth and lips, jaw and throat. Same thing. 10 out breaths. Breathing in normally, breathing out, relaxing the jaw. And again, breathing in normally breathing out, relaxing the shoulders. Check your posture again. Oh, your arms comfortably hanging by your sides. Is Your skull balanced on top of your spine? You're noticing the sensation of the shoulders, shoulders, rising and falling. And then Jen, the relaxing the shoulders on each out breath. Breathing in, normally breathing out, relaxing the shoulders.
Speaker 2:
32:32
Okay,
Speaker 1:
32:57
so you do that for 10 outbreath and we need to relax the hands, which is again, not something in our domain of experience for most of us. So what we do is breathing in, tighten the first, breathing out, relax the hand, breathing in tight in the first, breathing out, relaxing the hands. You know what, he needs to do that for about three or four cycles. What you're doing is you're training yourself to become aware, to feel the sensation of the hands relaxing, checking in with the body. Again, scalp comfortable as possible. Elbows by the side, breathing in normally breathing out, relaxing the hands. This is just an incremental process is an incremental process of relaxing the hands while we alax in the hands. And it's an incremental process of training where each time we do it we get better at it. So we need patients in learning to relax. But you're talking about six, six to eight weeks of patients if you do this on a daily basis and how we want to put it all together. So when we breathe in, we breathe in fully, not deeply. So you're not filling your chest as if you're going to go diving.
Speaker 1:
34:55
You're just breathing in through the nostrils. Focus on the cool sensation in the nostrils as you probably then when you breathe out, starting at the top of the head, relaxing the eyes, the jaw, shoulders and hands, body posture, relaxed, tongue up against the sharp, the teeth, relaxing eyes, jaw, shoulders, and hands. Like a wave of relaxation on the outbreath starting at the top of your head. Moving down to the tips of your fingers, down to your feet and into the ground. Coolness, relaxation, coolness, relaxation. Okay. And noticing what you can smell when you breathe in, what you can taste. The sensation of sitting may be wiggling your fingers and toes and then very on time.
Speaker 1:
36:42
Jen, a return your attention to the room. Hi, all we're looking for here is neutrality, neutral, calm, stillness. That's where we just want to get back, our natural state of calmness. And so you know, if you kind of look at anxiety as a, as a downward moving pendulum, what we want it to do is to swing up back towards the calm, neutral state. There aren't many people that can do. These are the exercises that I'm teaching the day that can do these without actually feeling calmer at the end of it. And even if it's a little bit, so let's say your 5% Karma, so you're coming, he said, oh, it's no good, it's only 5% Karma, but that's your first time and what we're looking for is another one or 2% every few days, every week and then you're able to monitor your progress, not by noticing how you're progressing right now is this, is this a good anxiety day or a bad anxiety day?
Speaker 1:
37:54
You're looking back at the Yo three months ago, six months ago, and have everybody makes progress. Everybody makes progress. If you, if you can find a way to bring these into your life it or you'll be able to use it and you'll discover situations change and problems go away, such as in a little bouts of anger, chronic anxiety will diminish its. It's got a whole bundle of benefits. There was a lot of things that can get in the way of this process of course. But overall if you stick with these sorts of practices and develop expertise, you'll get to the point where you can use them as a life skill and you can use it in all sorts of, this is the stuff of elite athletics. Yeah. Football players, Olympics sportsman, a lot of it's about psychology gets to a certain level and the team with the right psychology or the individual with the right psychology wins and psychology includes anxiety and fear at standing there ready, run out in front of 100,000 people and when they've got to win or they're going to lose their job and the emotions going to get in the way of you succeeding.
Speaker 1:
39:08
Okay, so what we've done there with the four, six breaths, that's a focus on anxiety and then sue as lesser extent on stress with their relaxation. Meditation is a focus mainly on stress, but partly on anxiety. So both of those work with anxiety. And what I'm going to do is teach you now think are called the relaxation response. Because what we need is we need a technique that we can use when the chips are down, when we don't have time, we don't have two minutes. We might be in a room getting a mental waterboarding offers somebody. We need to be able to respond now. And the way to do that is with the relaxation response. And that's what you were doing at the end of that training session. So you know it's, we relax the eyes, we relaxed the jaw, we relax the shoulders, relax the hands, and then we did this breathing in coolness, breathing out relaxation, master that and you master your difficult emotions that don't go away, but they stopped you doing the things that you know are unhelpful for your happiness because your emotions are in control of you. So if it's anger management, if it's becoming overwhelmed, you want to intervene in it or you want to manage your emotions for any reason in the situation, that's the way to do it. Call him breath.
Speaker 1:
40:43
The mind stops. It's like a pause button for thought relaxing. Outbreath you're bringing the body back in. Moving it from stress to relaxation is mutually exclusive. It's a switch. Literally are you're either in stress mode or you're in relaxation mode. We're training it to move ourselves to relaxation mode. So other times to do that, do the four tens meditation when you're going to sleep. So if you find it difficult, getting asleep is specially if you wake up in the night and find it difficult getting asleep. Yeah, if you don't find it difficult getting asleep, that's fine. Do it before you go to sleep. So there's that period when you get into bed, you committed to sleep, you might have a minute, two minutes, you do the four tenors meditation and you're using period of time, which is just generally pointless rumination that drifts you in dreams. And if you fall asleep during it, that's fine. It doesn't matter. That'd be days where you don't fall asleep. And if you want to fall asleep then it'll help. But the key to it is not to want to fall asleep. The key to it is to wants to do the meditation.
Speaker 2:
42:03
Yeah.
Speaker 1:
42:04
So move your mind over to wanting to do the meditation. Give up on sleep, cite yourself. Doing this for an hour is as good as sleep and is. Move over to doing this and focus on it. Each time your mind wanders, you just come back, start at the eyes again. Eyes, jaw, shoulders, hands, 10 out. Brass. For each one mind wanders back to the eyes, back to the eyes, back to the eyes. Okay, so that's, those are the two key techniques. Then we're left with the mind. Yeah. So wake up in the morning, monkey mind's going, Yadda Yadda, Yadda. I go to bed at night, Yada, Yada, Yada. All through the day. We spend 50% of our lives with our mind wandering and what we want to be able to do is intervene in that. The most useful technique for intervening in it that works for the majority of people are, well actually no, just about half is a thing called counting the breaths. You can also use this as an aid to sleep, but the four tens meditation is more effective. But there will I be every, everybody's different. There'll be some of you for whom this is more of a benefit to get to sleep than say four tenders, meditation and yeah, again, you're finding the time to be able to practice it. So it's for counting the breaths. We begin by noticing the breath. So what I'll do is I'll begin and end this meditation with a bell.
Speaker 1:
43:45
You can either notice the breath in the nostrils or know or notice the breath in the belly, whichever is the most convenient or if you prefer anywhere else where you're aware of the rising and falling of the breath. That's it. We're just noticing the breath. Noticing the breath rising. No, it's saying the breath folding and then what we're doing is counting the breaths.
Speaker 2:
44:18
Okay,
Speaker 1:
44:18
so we count one on the in breath to on the outbreath, three on the m breath for on the out breath up to 10 gets a 10 star or one lose count. Start at does she? Using the inner voice one on the in breath till on the outbreath, three on the in breath for on the out breath thoughts a 10 gets a 10 star, one lose count star one. Let's practice this for the next few minutes is called counting the breaths. Okay. And again, breathing in, noticing what you can smell, what you can taste, what you can hear, the sensation of sitting.
Speaker 2:
47:00
Okay,
Speaker 1:
47:02
gently return your attention to the room. So it's true that nearly 50% of people find that that calms their mind. There are a whole bundle of other techniques and when we say calm the mind, all we want to do is reduce the volume. The reason for that is because all of these things are connected. So anxiety and stress are most deeply connected, but then thought is connected to anxieties and stress as well. So for example, you can have a thought on that con yeah, happens all the time. You have a thought and there's an emotion pops up or there's an emotion and a thought pops up. So those are an associative link there. And if thought gets in or spiral, then your emotions are going to be maintained based on whatever the thoughts happen to be to where we're focused on. That's how we feel. And all of these things work together to help us to intervene in our emotional state. They work together to get back our neutrality. But then what we also want to be able to do is, is to learn to help to elevate our mood. So to elevate our mood, I teach a technique called self compassion meditation. So we'll just practice that for a couple of minutes.
Speaker 1:
48:27
And this is a breath based meditation as well because were repeating a mantra and all the mantra is, is something that we repeat in our minds and it's on the out breaths. And the mantra is first outbreath may I be well second outbreath and may I be happy. So out press, may I find peace of mind, may I be well, may I be happy my I find peace of mind checking in with your posture, balanced and relaxed on relaxing, on the out breath as you breathe out. May I be well, may I be happy my, I find peace of mind. If there's minor irritations or problems or such, like difficulties in your life and someone's causing them, you say the mantra for them. May they be well, may they be happy? Might I find peace of mind? This is all the people that irritate you or frustrate you. Sayi
Speaker 2:
50:28
unhelpful, inconsiderate, thoughtless things. Might I be? Well,
Speaker 1:
50:37
I mean I'd be happy, right? I find peace of mind, but most of the time we want to be doing this for ourselves. No. Seeing what you can smell and taste and feel and the sensation of setting and checking in with your posture
Speaker 3:
51:25
very, very on time.
Speaker 1:
51:28
Gently returning your attention to the room.
Speaker 1:
51:37
Okay. That's it for anxiety, but all sorts of levels of calm lists that come from this kind of clarified the times that you can squeeze it into your life, just when you're waking up and that time when you're just going to sleep so that you don't have to invest any useful time in it. It's, it's time that happens every day and it just gets utilized generally via unproductive mental processes. And so you're actually replacing those. You're helping yourself get asleep. If you do the four six in the morning, there's a thing called a cortisol spike in the morning as up to 10 times. The amount, of course, is all, which is a stress chemical. It's bringing you back online, making you alert so that you can get into the being awake rather than being asleep. And what that means is if you're anxious, you're very anxious in the morning. So intervening in it with a full sex perhaps is a good thing to do.