Party in the Front!

Summary

In this episode of the Church Talk Podcast, hosts Jason Allison and Rob Paterson engage in a lively discussion with guests Jeff Dillon and Ty Dannenbring about the importance of community connection, the impact of loneliness in modern society, and the concept of 'party theology' as a means to foster relationships. They explore cultural shifts that have led to increased isolation, the barriers to connection, and practical tips for church leaders to encourage outreach and engagement within their communities. The conversation emphasizes the need for authenticity, intentionality, and the power of hospitality in building meaningful relationships.

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Transcript

Jason Allison (00:00)
Well, welcome everybody back to the church talk podcast with Robin Jason Rob is good to see you my friend life going okay. We haven't actually talked in a few days and I just I get lost without you.

Rob Paterson (00:12)
You know, that makes perfect sense. You ought to feel lost without me.

Jason Allison (00:15)
Well,

tomorrow, though, we do get to hang out because we're we've got our central Ohio lead team and we've got all our pastors coming, coming in to spend some time together for the day. And I mean, really cool. We get to zoom in with Mitch Harrison. We had him on a few weeks ago and his book running on fuel on what is it running on full. My goodness. Yeah, it's middle afternoon. My medication is wearing off. So ⁓

Rob Paterson (00:34)
Full. Full.

You

Jason Allison (00:40)
But

yeah, it's going to be a lot of fun having him zoom in because he's in Vegas. So he didn't want to just zip over for a little bit of time. But yeah, that's been exciting. But yeah, I don't know besides that. Anything else?

Rob Paterson (00:52)
In fairness to Mitch, he did want to zip over, but we decided we wanted to save him zipping over for a larger pool of people as opposed to just one lead team.

Jason Allison (01:03)
Yeah, yeah, that is true. We want to get all of the pastors in the entire mid-Atlantic region involved if we're going to bring Mitch in. That's a valid point.

Rob Paterson (01:12)
Yeah, you know, it's interesting. Jeremy and I, one of my staff guys, we just did our annual planning retreat to map out our teaching series for all of 2026, just a couple of weeks ago. And for our small groups on ramp series, we are actually going to do a series called running on full where we encourage our whole church to get a copy of Mitch's book and, to go through that. I'm, I am just like super excited. It's such a simple concept, right?

Jason Allison (01:41)
Yeah,

Rob Paterson (01:42)
But the

Jason Allison (01:42)
yeah.

Rob Paterson (01:42)
idea, I mean, it doesn't matter if you're a teenager, 20-something, you know, all the way up to, you know, kind of pushing toward the grave. I just hear people all the time talking about how burned out they are and how they're running on empty. And so I just sort of felt like, man, if we can do anything to help people to feel like they're running on full more often than not, what a good gift.

Jason Allison (02:02)
Yeah. yeah. Yeah.

man. I love that. I love that. And, you know, one of the things that really gets gets my energy back up parties. I just I'm an extrovert. so, man, give me an excuse for a party. I am in. And today we get to talk to a couple of guys who I just by, you know, meet them. I think they know how to party and.

Jeff Dillon (02:14)
Hahaha

Jason Allison (02:26)
but in a good way. No, mean, today we, I'm really excited, Rob. We've got a great conversation lined up for today. We have with us, Jeff Dillon and Ty Dannenbring. I hope I said that right. ⁓ I never checked the pronunciations of people's names. I just go for it. But yeah, these two guys, Jeff is the pastor at Redemption or is a pastor at Redemption Church in Loveland, Colorado. And I love you were a journalism major at Colorado State University. So that really

Jeff Dillon (02:37)
You got it. Nailed it.

That's right.

Jason Allison (02:53)
It's a good preparation for ministry. And I actually mean that sincerely. I can see that would be really helpful. ⁓ because there you did, you learned how to share stories and things. And that's so important. You're married to Becca and emails. Yes.

Jeff Dillon (02:58)
⁓ yeah.

And emails as Jeff. Yeah,

I write, I write a mean church email guys. mean, bullets are worthy. Hey, I was going to put that out of business now though. That's true.

Jason Allison (03:11)
Well, wow. Yeah,

Rob Paterson (03:11)
Nice.

Jason Allison (03:15)
here and I thought chat GTP was the best way to do that. Now I just got to call you. But you have five kids and I think that would explain why you love the mountains. Anything to get away? No, I'm saying and traveling and being outside. No, that's great. And Ty, you are a financial advisor there in town and obviously I'm assuming you attend the church since you guys, you know.

Jeff Dillon (03:18)
Yeah.

Rob Paterson (03:20)
you

Jeff Dillon (03:26)
That's right. ⁓

Jason Allison (03:39)
or at least connected and have written a book together. But you also have a whole bunch of kids. And yet somehow with five kids, you still claim to be an avid golfer. And that I am so impressed with that. And I'm not lying. That is amazing.

Jeff Dillon (03:48)
Yeah.

That's why I became a financial

advisor so I could golf more.

Jason Allison (03:54)
I you know what that thought crossed my mind. I'm not going to lie. That is exactly why. So I this week I've actually playing golf with a guy and he is at a country club and he is a financial advisor. And I'm like, hmm, I think I'm seeing a connection here as to. It does, yeah, yeah, that must be nice anyway. No, we got we are so glad you're here because you guys just don't just but in the last couple of years have come out with a book that I think is.

Jeff Dillon (03:57)
Yeah.

Yeah, if it's like a glove, it's good.

Jason Allison (04:21)
Phenomenal, I think it's got some great stuff. You know, it's I love the title, Party in the Front. I mean, that is phenomenal. So maybe let's just get started and say like, what what prompted you even think about this and tell a little bit of your story?

Jeff Dillon (04:35)
Yeah, thanks. I'll start us off. I came up with the book title and I was actually mowing my lawn and just started kind of laughing to myself about the idea of like a reverse mullet, you know, that haircut. And so it's kind of a play on words there. But we had started to try to connect with our neighbors about four years ago when we moved into our now neighborhood. And it was just post-COVID and it was just kind of people coming out of their houses, really.

and trying to connect was hard. we moved our Blackstone griddle from the backyard to the front. And we just started having pancake breakfast and just being out front more intentionally. And so just the name stuck. And I was like, I got to write a book about this. And then I'm not going to write it by myself. Who do I know? Jeff. Jeff knows how to write. that's journalism.

Jason Allison (05:20)
There you go. Nice. I love that. So Jeff, you come in. What part did you play in this party in the front?

Rob Paterson (05:22)
Mm, yeah.

Jeff Dillon (05:29)
Yeah, yeah, tie. Tie is the fun. I'm just the I'm just the the words guy. I feel like I'm like a good like mustard or relish or something like I'm like, you you're like the sandwich that I can like, I'm like a dog. But tie brings the flavor, you know, but you got to have fun. That's right. That's right. There you go. See, it all makes sense. But no, yeah, you know, being a journalism major and a pastor, like I've talked about

Jason Allison (05:44)
Okay. But you hold it all together. Yeah. Yeah. It does.

Jeff Dillon (05:57)
I think every pastor has about 40 different book ideas. know, someday we'll write that book. And so I've always wanted to write something and, um, Ty approached me with this idea about three years ago, a little over three years ago, and just said like, you know, what do you think about this idea? And I was like, man, I think it sounds great. And I'd be willing to take a shot at it. And it resonated with us because my wife and I and our kids, um, we had just moved, um, right at the end of 2019. So right before

all the COVID craziness. ⁓ we moved to a house where we live on, I call it an eyebrow. Apparently no one else calls it that, but it's like a little separate drive off the main streets of the neighborhood. I don't know, but I've heard people call it different things, but okay, yeah. I think I made that up.

Jason Allison (06:28)
Mm-hmm.

Okay, yeah.

Rob Paterson (06:45)
Never heard eyebrow until right now. I was today years old.

Jason Allison (06:49)
Own it, man, own it.

Jeff Dillon (06:50)
I don't know how high, yeah, anyway. We'll go with it. That little separate drive became where we spent all our time. All of a sudden our girls wanted to be in the front and not in the back. And when COVID hit, we realized the power of that because we were meeting all of our neighbors and people walk by our house. We live close to a park. We're meeting other families in the neighborhood. And we were realizing how hungry many of our neighbors were for connection. so

Jason Allison (07:07)
Mm.

Jeff Dillon (07:16)
our neighbors would just come out while we were out there playing with our kids and just want to talk. And so when Ty shared that idea, I was like, yes, like that that resonates personally as well as just just the idea in general. And so we gave it a shot.

Jason Allison (07:21)
Hmm.

Rob Paterson (07:30)
Yeah, guys, that's so good. As you're talking about this, I'm thinking right before COVID hit, my wife and I bought a new house as well. But we actually moved from a subdivision where all of our neighbors were like 10 feet that way and 10 feet that way ⁓ to a house on 20 acres. And throughout COVID, we kind of said, it's so nice that our kids during these kind of quarantined, avoiding people,

Jeff Dillon (07:37)
Yep.

You

Wow.

Rob Paterson (07:55)
kind of moments they had 20 wooded acres to go like play on and have adventures on and even invite some friends over to. But just, you know, as a pastor, just because of the nature of what I do and who we are, I mean, we have a huge bonfire every year and invite 50 people over and you know, our small group comes over to our house all the time and you know, there's like plenty of yard just to park wherever and so, you know, we can have all these people over. But like in general,

You know, it seems like people feel more isolated, people are more isolated. So maybe talk a little bit, you know, about how our culture has shifted over the last hundred years or so. And, like leaving people just kind of with isolation and loneliness is kind of the key, key aspects in life sometimes.

Jeff Dillon (08:42)
Yeah. Yeah. We did a lot of research on that with the book and went back to look at that. Like how has culture changed? And there's so many things you can point to. And I think that's why the book, the idea of the book really resonates with people, whether they come from a faith background or not is like, people are like, yeah, something has changed in our world, you know, and, people don't know their neighbors like they used to. And so, so in some of our research, you know, just going back to look at obviously

Especially kind of the post-World War II era, era when people started kind of the suburbs kind of became a thing, right? And people were moving out of cities and getting some space. And early on there was very much that community mindset. And, you know, we talk about like bridge and things like that. These old like card games, you know, that people used to play, my grandparents used to talk about. There were bridge clubs and bowling clubs and all these things that neighbors would do.

Rob Paterson (09:15)
Mmm.

Jason Allison (09:32)
Hmm.

Jeff Dillon (09:37)
When you get to about the seventies and eighties, which is really kind of when television starts to explode more and just about every home now has a television. and then certainly as you get into the nineties and the two thousands and the internet, know, and everything changes and, you just see the statistics of, of neighborhood interaction, community, social interaction, just plummet over those decades. And then you get all the way to COVID in 2020 and it just like sucked.

Jason Allison (09:50)
Mm-hmm.

Jeff Dillon (10:04)
all of the remaining social contact. I mean, to the point that we were, you know, not supposed to be together for a while there. So, so we studied that a lot. And one of the things that really it came out as we were writing this book is the US Surgeon General in 2023 actually declared an epidemic of loneliness in our country. So this is our government saying, like, there is a major problem here with loneliness.

Jason Allison (10:11)
Right.

Hmm.

Wow.

Rob Paterson (10:25)
Mmm.

Jeff Dillon (10:32)
And they actually, that report had a bunch of interesting stats in it. But one of the, real eye opening things is, is they found based on their studies and the impact on health, that it's more dangerous to be lonely than to smoke 15 cigarettes a day. Like that's what their study found. It's all like loneliness is like, is, is killing people is, is harming people physically. So those are some of the things that we found. Yeah. And I'll just add like,

Jason Allison (10:50)
Wow. Yeah. Man. Yeah.

Rob Paterson (11:00)
Wow.

Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (11:02)
You know,

when we think of structured houses and how they're structured and how neighborhoods are structured, I think we're starting to see a little bit of a shift back to the way they were in the 50s and 60s. But nowadays, people just, it's easy just to drive into their garage and shut the garage door behind them. then you think about things like, hey, we've got a way to just order food in. We've got a way to just watch church online.

Jason Allison (11:08)
you

Jeff Dillon (11:26)
go to online classes. You know, people don't live by their families anymore. There's just a lot more nomads out there. And so just the bonds, the things that brought people together typically over the last 30, 40 years are starting to drift away from that. And so that's why we're like, hey, we got to be intentional to actually have meaningful conversations with people.

Jason Allison (11:47)
Yeah, I love that because like you guys kind of introduced what I can't remember if you said this or this just came to mind as I was putting your words together. basically a party theology. You know, it's like, it's like, what does that look like? What does that mean? Because, you know, you read through the Old Testament that there's, mean, God basically requires the people of Israel to throw parties every so often. I mean, that's like in the law and which find by me, but, know,

Rob Paterson (11:47)
habits.

Jeff Dillon (11:58)
Yeah.

Yep.

Jason Allison (12:17)
But I'm wondering, how have you

seen that play out? Like, as you guys have really looked into this, do you see this party theology as something that is actually happening? Has it completely gone away? What do we do about

Jeff Dillon (12:30)
Jeff, you want to take a step? Yeah, I mean, I think I think that's, you know, the challenge right now is I think it's it's maybe as hard as it's ever been to to live those things out in our culture. And there's always been different challenges. And so, you know, it's easy to just whine about how hard it is for us. But, you know, it is just different now where like you're you're you're trying to fight past a lot of barriers that didn't exist 20, 30, 50 years ago. And I think

You know, the first thing that I think of is like what God has designed the church to be right. A fellowship of believers, a family that invites people in that welcomes people in, you know, Paul talks about this idea in Ephesians that weren't like the Jews and Greeks just complete polar opposites. Enemies have been made one in Christ. And so like of any people on earth that has a message of what brings people together, it's it's Christians, right? It's people that

Have the hope of the gospel like that is what gets us past those barriers. And one of the big things that we really discovered along the way, it's funny because you set out to write this book and you think, you know, exactly what it's going to be about. had a great little outline at the start and it kind of is still there, but the book kind of becomes its own thing. And one of the things that really, I think God led us to in the book was there's a lot of barriers externally to, getting to know our neighbors and moving towards people.

Jason Allison (13:40)
you

you

Jeff Dillon (13:57)
But there's also a lot of barriers in us too. Right. And that was something we really wrestled with. Cause like, I'll be honest, I even as a pastor writing a book about the party, there's still many days where I drive home, I'm exhausted. I'm peopled out. I'm sure you guys understand that. And I want to just drive into my garage and close it and ignore everybody around me. And yet that's not what God calls us to. And so I think we, we spend a lot of time in the book wrestling with like, what is that in us?

Rob Paterson (14:00)
Mm.

Jason Allison (14:12)
Amen. Amen.

Mm.

Jeff Dillon (14:26)
Which

of course we, we, we trace all the way back to, Genesis, you know, in the fall and, and that there's something in us, there's a broken relationship that needs to be addressed. And we believe it's addressed by the gospel.

Jason Allison (14:30)
Yeah.

Hmm.

Rob Paterson (14:37)
Hmm.

So good. You know, you guys have said this a number of times. It made me think, gosh, it's probably been 20 years ago. I heard Leonard sweet. He was speaking at a conference that I was at and, he talked about like, you know, the, suburbs and, and, and I think, know, anyone today, like building a house and I know there's like the functional convenience of it, but just how he described it and you guys said it, maybe using different words. said, you know, it used to be, we all had front porches.

So we could like talk to our neighbors as they walked by and just anyone. And now we have these mouths on the front of our houses where we push a button, they open, we drive in and we live closer than ever to people. And yet we still, you know, like we still don't interact. And so yeah, that what a, what a fascinating thing, you know, just to consider, I mean, you know, good design, you know, uh, convenience, all those things, but the ramifications of what we've done.

are really, really fascinating. So in your book, you guys talk about, you kind of call it three party fouls. Can you tell us like what they are?

Jeff Dillon (15:43)
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, that was really interesting exploring because it's like there's so many things we could talk about. But I think we really kind of nailed down a few that that really stood out to us. And one of them is is just busyness. And I think it's actually the last one we talk about. But it's funny because I keep coming back to that. And I think that's something everybody can relate to. I think we are the busiest generation ever. I think that's pretty easy to.

Jason Allison (15:57)
Yeah. Yeah.

Rob Paterson (16:02)
Hmm

Jeff Dillon (16:08)
to, to defend when it, when it comes to how much we try to do, how much we're aware of how distracted we are. And so, you know, we just, we just really wanted to wrestle with that reality again of like, okay, it's easy to point the finger at all the things out there, but like, do we actually create space in our, in our calendars, to be able to make those connections and it takes intentionality. It takes saying no to other things to be available to people around you. And so.

one of those things was, was just wrestling with, with the busy-ness that we face. So you want to take another one? Well, and I'll just, I was having a conversation with my dad the other night and we were talking about club sports and you know, my kids are, well, both of our kids are about the same age and we're having to make those decisions on what to say yes to, what to say no to and yes to golf. Yeah. Yes. Even though it's four hours around. but, but my dad was saying, Ty club sports are killing.

Jason Allison (16:40)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (17:04)
families. he because we have another family friend that we just don't see as often. And my dad's like, Yeah, just we never see him anymore, because they're always at club sports on the weekends. And so yeah, busyness, we just have to be intentional about what we're saying yes and no to. ⁓ You know, another one. Another party foul is the political division. And, you know, obviously, right now, more than ever, it just is something that we need to talk about. and so, yeah, I mean,

Jason Allison (17:04)
Hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Rob Paterson (17:20)
Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (17:32)
It's hard when you go to a party and you don't know anybody. Obviously there's this tension of like, what can I say? Who's a safe place to talk about this stuff with? But yeah, anything else you wanna add about that?

Jason Allison (17:38)
Mm-hmm.

Rob Paterson (17:41)
Yeah.

Well, no, I wanted to, when you said that, Ty, it made me think, so, you every year, I'm sure you guys do this too, Jeff, like, you know, we always have tried to create on ramps for people to get connected in small groups and relationships and community, those kinds of things at our church. And, and I still remember one year there was kind of that season and there was one of our small groups that was going to have a little a cookout.

And so they just invited a bunch of different people who might be interested in getting connected. And so there's some really good friends of mine who showed up to this and this couple, he is conservative and she is liberal. Like it's just in their politics and, it works for them and that's totally fine. So they show up and there was this older couple and this guy, as soon as he saw like my email address and our church bulletin, like he starts, he's the guy that was emailing me.

Jeff Dillon (18:21)
Yep. Yep.

Rob Paterson (18:34)
And this was even after this was like, like who, who this was the president, but I would get like one or two times a week, like president Obama is the anti-Christ kind of emails and conspiracy theories and all that sort of stuff. And so this couple literally sits down across a picnic table from this older couple. And this guy can't help himself. He just starts spewing his partisan political hate. And this couple left.

Jeff Dillon (18:44)
Right, right, yep, yep.

Rob Paterson (19:02)
And the wife was like, we are never going to go to any small group thing ever again, like between now and when we die, because a stranger couldn't keep their mouth shut about their weird extreme political views. You know, so I totally see how that could be an alienating party foul for sure.

Jeff Dillon (19:08)
Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And it's, it's a, it's a challenging one, right? I mean, you can write a whole book on it. There have been lots of books written about it, but like, I think that what we really thought about is, is especially when it comes to, your neighborhood and where you live. Yeah. You know, it's like, again, there's already a lot of barriers to connection. Like why would you add more, you know, and, we even talk a little bit in the book and this is a little bit controversial probably because, you know, I have

Jason Allison (19:43)
Ready.

Jeff Dillon (19:49)
Lots of friends and family members who do this, but like even putting out like political signs at election season, it's a, it's about that time again, ⁓ you're locally and like, it's like, get it. And there's, and there's times and causes that I think as Christians, need to be very vocal about. But when you put those things up in your yard, it's, it's almost like you just turned off half of your neighborhood instantly, right? Not going to talk to them. And even if you have a very, you know, deep, well thought out, know, open handed.

Jason Allison (19:55)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yeah, yes.

Rob Paterson (20:12)
Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (20:19)
perspective on things and could have a great conversation. There's not going to be a conversation because you just, you just put up a barrier. so let's think we need to wrestle with some of those things. Not that we can't or shouldn't stand up for things or speak out on things, but when it comes to reaching out to the people around us, I think we need to lead with the gospel, not with our politics.

Jason Allison (20:25)
Mm-hmm.

Mmm.

Rob Paterson (20:38)
Yeah, so good. So what's the third party foul?

Jason Allison (20:38)
Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (20:42)
the racial divide. So yeah, obviously, you know, we're trying to hit on some some things that people should be talking about and need to talk about. But how do you talk about that with with people? And so we just want to kind of state the obvious in this book.

Jason Allison (20:43)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. So I just literally just submitted an article to our local newspaper and the title of it was prophetic hospitality. I'm trying to challenge people to use your hospitality as a prophetic witness to the status quo, the culture, to the messages that we keep getting of, hey, you're supposed to hate them.

Jeff Dillon (21:04)
Yes.

Hmm.

Jason Allison (21:18)
Right. And and demon say, what would it look like if we decided to be a prophetic voice, not by shouting, right, but instead by having a party and welcoming people who don't necessarily know. I'm not supposed to be around someone like that, but instead we do it. And man, I was reading your book going, yes, like, let's do this. You know, because it's a party. Let's relax. Let's actually just get to know each other. So.

Jeff Dillon (21:19)
Right.

Yep.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

Rob Paterson (21:44)
Mm-hmm.

Jason Allison (21:46)
Yeah, I love the way you guys laid out because even in the political divides, which, you know, can be very a dicey topic to throw in a book. Right. I mean, you know, it's it's easy to lot of landmines that you could step on. But as you guys navigated it, it was more about, hey, let's let's acknowledge it like you just said. Right. And then let's let's get through it together because it's about the gospel. It's not about, you know, which party you are, which kind of goes back to what you're saying. You know, the busyness and stuff.

Jeff Dillon (21:55)
Yeah.

Yep.

you

Jason Allison (22:16)
That problem is answered. And I think you guys addressed this in the book. It's answered by your identity in Christ, right? It's those those divisions, those those things that are barriers. When we really learn who we are in Christ, then we can throw these parties right. We can be present in our front yard, even though the people that may be walking by disagree with this, you know. So, yeah, I love the I just love the way you guys present this in the book.

Jeff Dillon (22:22)
Yeah, right.

Jason Allison (22:44)
Yeah. Were you going to say something?

Jeff Dillon (22:44)
Yeah.

Well, I think, yeah, I mean, you know, on all of these topics, I actually, this is, this is maybe getting like super deep, but my, my, nine year old was drawing pictures of this, like little, little alien creature the other day. And she, she had, it was called like a. A boof loop or something like that, some weird name, but it was like really creative and she, she was drawing all these pictures of like, this is the creature sad. This is the creature mad, you know,

And then there was one of the creature happy and, you know, big smile on its face. And I was like, what's this around it? was like, this is its protective bubble. And like, like it's, it's happy cause it's safe, you know? And I think, you know, it goes a couple of places in my mind, but like, I think a lot of times we, we were, pull away from people and hard conversations to, to try to keep ourselves safe.

Rob Paterson (23:25)
Mmm.

Jeff Dillon (23:37)
And we forget that exactly what you're talking about that our identity in Christ is secure. And we actually do have an eternal bubble around us, protecting us. Like we should be the people that are willing to move towards the other and move into hard conversations and even have people think wrongly about us or be unkind to us, you know, and because we are secure in who we are in Christ. so I just think that's, yeah, that's, that's what we want to get across to people is like, okay,

Rob Paterson (23:51)
Mm. Mm.

Jeff Dillon (24:06)
It starts in us with a recognition of who we are in Christ and what the gospel does to transform us. And that's what enables us to push past those barriers towards other people.

Jason Allison (24:15)
Yeah.

Well, you've got to go ahead, Rob.

Rob Paterson (24:16)
Yeah, Jeff.

Yeah, Jeff, a friend of mine just shared this analogy that we heard years ago at exponential, which I thought was so good. And the idea is that avocados are better than cookies, right? Because so many Christians are like cookies. We have this crispy exterior and a soft center. So if you were to push past our, our beliefs and our opinions and all that kind of stuff, you would find people who

are loving and kind and generous. The problem is people aren't willing to push past that exterior, so that's all they see. And that's a negative thing, where instead we should be like avocados. When people first encounter us, there's like a softer exterior, but yet we have a core that is solid and firm and stable that literally leads and guides everything in our lives.

Jeff Dillon (24:49)
Yeah. Yep.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes.

That's great. We gotta have avatados at our next party in the front. For sure. That's good stuff. I like it.

Jason Allison (25:11)
There you go. Well, hey,

one of the statements you guys make, this one just jumped out at me. You make the statement God loves your neighbors as much as he loves you. I love that. I mean, I just stopped when I read that line. And I've when I work with churches, often I'll make the statement that, you know, God wants to save the people in this neighborhood more than you do. But the way you worded that, you know, God loves your neighbors as much.

How have you seen that kind of truth impact the people like in your church as you began to talk about this idea that, you know, God loves the neighbors, even the ones that don't go to church or, you know, the couple behind you that, yes, yes, how have you seen that impact people as you've taught that and lived that out?

Rob Paterson (25:51)
Or have the different political sign?

Jeff Dillon (25:53)
Right, right.

Yeah, great question. And I'm glad you appreciated that. I don't know if this exactly answers your question, but when I look at Paul's example, God saved Paul, and then he started reaching out to the Gentiles. And that was so radical for that time. And I'm sure he got persecution from that. So it's like, think for us, we just want to lead by example.

Hopefully at our small groups or whoever the people that we're bringing along or introducing to our friend groups and our friends notice that, they're not from this Christian bubble that I'm used to at church. We can just lead by example. For different parts of the country, it's going to look different and for all of our backgrounds. I think just having that, getting back to the avocado, the core of knowing who we are, that frees us up to just be an example. Yeah.

Jason Allison (26:39)
Yeah.

Hmm.

Yeah, I'd love that.

Jeff Dillon (26:50)
One of the things we talk about in the book is what's called the blessed strategy, which I don't know if had you guys heard of that before? Yeah. And so we definitely did not come up with it. We stole it from somebody because that's what pastors do. That's what we do. That's what we do. We just reuse each other's stuff, but it's so helpful. And we've used that as a church over the years and we really wanted to include that. and so, you know, the first, the B stands for begin with prayer.

Jason Allison (26:55)
Mm-hmm. yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Rob Paterson (26:57)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jason Allison (27:05)
Yeah.

Rob Paterson (27:05)
Amen.

Jeff Dillon (27:18)
Right. It starts with prayer. so we've really just challenged our church and I've been challenged to just be faithful to pray for our neighbors and, which challenges you first to know their names, to know who they are. And so, one of our, our former pastors actually, Greg Pugh, he, he would encourage us all to like, draw a little map of your neighborhood or print one out from Google and, write people's names as you meet them.

Jason Allison (27:30)
Yes, yes.

Jeff Dillon (27:44)
and then put it in your kitchen or somewhere that you can be prominent, which helps you then when they walk up like, I remember their name, but also prompts you to pray for them. And so that's one of the biggest things that I think we've encouraged people with is like, as you start to intentionally get to know, and then pray for your neighbors, it's amazing how God starts to just give you that heart to like, to love them and to, to build a relationship with them. And so we've been praying for some of our neighbors now for five, six years.

Jason Allison (28:12)
you

Jeff Dillon (28:12)
And we've

seen God do some incredible things in their lives and in those relationships. And now they're like, they're not just our neighbors, they're our friends. And, and so that's what we're trying to encourage. And it takes that step of just, yeah, start starting with prayer and caring about them enough to move towards them.

Jason Allison (28:20)
Yeah.

Rob Paterson (28:20)
Mm.

Jason Allison (28:30)
Yeah.

Rob Paterson (28:31)
So good, so good. So, you know, as you guys are talking, I'm thinking to myself, you know, I've planted a number of churches and I still remember one of the churches we were launching. There was a family who was checking us out and I invited him and one of his kids over for Monday night football at our house. And a couple months in, this was just so weird for me because it's the opposite of how, you know, I'm wired when they were like, hey,

And they'd adopted some kids, white family, upper middle class. They'd adopted some kids from Africa. The thing they loved about what we were doing is we were planting kind of this inner city, you know, diverse expression of faith. And they're like, we want our kids to be around people that look like them. And in the, you know, upper white middle-class community we live in, like they don't see anyone who looks like them. So they were really compelled. But as they were basically telling me, Hey, we're going to stay at the rich, fancy white church that we've been going to.

One of the reasons they gave was, you you are like an open book and we can actually get to know you. And for us, we want our pastor to be someone older that we can put on a pedestal and never get to know. And I'm just like, it was just like such a weird, you know, kind of thing to kind of hit my ears. In the book, like you talk about this idea, like one of the great benefits of throwing a party in the front.

Jeff Dillon (29:38)
interesting.

Rob Paterson (29:49)
is that people can actually get to know the real us. And I think for people who, if your neighbors know all of their Christians or they're like highly involved at their church or they're a pastor or whatever, there's some barriers and thoughts that might be in someone's mind that may not really be true at all. Why is it important that people get to know the real us and that we are human beings too?

Jeff Dillon (30:16)
Yeah, I think, you know, for people to relate to us, you know, it's, we can't relate to people when they think differently of us, because they're like, Hey, that's my Christian neighbor. I don't really want to talk to them. And then like, but then if they like know that you're like a Broncos fan, or if they know that you're, that you like to golf or whatever, they're like, you can find some common ground. And then you're relatable. You can, you hopefully then have some meaningful conversations about like, Hey, this is

Jason Allison (30:37)
you

Jeff Dillon (30:44)
This is my family background and you go into that deep enough, you're going to find some dysfunction there. so, yeah, I think that's the biggest thing is just being able to be relatable. Yeah, this is what led us to on the cover of our book. There's a Highland, which is a very, you know, a popular cow these days. And we we we kind of came to that because of obviously the party in the front hairdo, right? Like the Highland has the reverse mullet going on.

Rob Paterson (30:53)
Mm.

Jeff Dillon (31:10)
But actually, as again, as we were writing, like, it really kind of became our mascot, the Highland, because I mean, you see you really do see them everywhere, you know, like, like, I've been in some, you know, nice friends houses and things where they have like beautiful art, and there's this big picture of a highland on it. It's like, that's art now, which is just funny to me. But I but everybody loves the Highland. And so we talk in the book about how what makes the Highland lovable is not that it's this

Jason Allison (31:15)
you

Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (31:38)
You know, beautiful. It's actually very kind of goofy looking messy animal. but it's unique and it's real and everybody's just like, you know, attracted to it somehow. that sounds weird being attracted to Highland, but you know, and so, know, ⁓ it's like, kind of became this symbol for us of like, what you're talking about, Rob, which is like, do we actually allow people to see the real us and actually what,

Jason Allison (31:52)
We get it, we get it.

Jeff Dillon (32:05)
What really creates opportunities for relationship is that realness, that authenticity. And it's so heartbreaking to hear like that family actually didn't want that, right? Because I think what they see is like, wait, if you're going to be that real, then we've got to be real with you, right? And like, that's scary. so, but I think more people than not crave that. I think we were designed for that. And so if we can model that for people, especially for our neighbors,

Jason Allison (32:21)
Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (32:32)
to show like, man, we're messy people. We're like, just come on in, come on over. Like, this is just our lives and let people into that. It makes them realize like, okay, like I don't have to put up a front. I can be real. I can be messy too. And then that's, I think the place where real relationship can start.

Jason Allison (32:50)
Yeah, yeah, I agree. Building on that, you know, in the last chapter, you give some very practical just tips, suggestions, ideas. I mean, for our listeners, you know, we've got pastors and and so forth. But I mean, this is this is some great stuff on suggestions, ideas, maybe share a couple that either you've done or you've seen done that just you really like. Share a couple of those suggestions if you don't mind.

Jeff Dillon (33:16)
Yeah, I'll give a couple of fall related ones that come to my mind. And this one's a little bit controversial when it comes to Halloween. You know, because you can take a couple different sides on that. And I think everyone's got their own convictions and for good reason. you know, we decided to do a hot chocolate bar as a family and kind of enter into that situation. Because I mean, think about it like you have

all your neighbors and their friends literally coming to your door. you know, obviously we want to, to some degree use wisdom with what our kids are going to be seeing for some of those costumes and stuff. But there are some scary costumes. But with people coming to your door, hot chocolate bar outside, of course, in the front is a way for us to serve the parents. It gives them a reason just to linger a little bit longer. And you're, you're inevitably going to have some conversations. I mean,

we never had anyone that's like, I wish we had candy instead of this hot chocolate bar, you know, and you can obviously have candy too, but like, we made it fun. We had sprinkles. had obviously marshmallows, like just make it a fun thing. And so that's just one example for, for how to kind of enter into Halloween instead of turning your lights off. Yeah.

Jason Allison (34:20)
Now I will. So I got I got I got one suggestion that

probably is even more controversial ⁓ because in my neighborhood as the kids go around, know, Chris, the parents are right behind him. If you walk up to because we all put in Ohio and it's a suburb, right? You know, we put it. We've got those little burn, you know, things, little little bonfire thing, but it's just a little campfire. And so we all have that on our driveway, right?

Jeff Dillon (34:26)
Great.

Yeah.

Jason Allison (34:46)
And then there is usually the basket of candy for the kids. And then there's a cooler to the side. That's for the adults that are having to traipse around the neighborhood. some of them will on their post office box, right? Their mailbox. If there's something in there for the adults, the flag will be up. So there are adult beverages scattered throughout the neighborhood.

Jeff Dillon (35:05)
man.

Yeah.

it's funny. Yeah, they have. Yep.

Jason Allison (35:11)
So they've taken that to another level. That's a whole nother thing. But I love that

idea. And I've actually tried to do that the last few years, like, you know, set up something that's got the fire, just gives people space to talk. And, you know, I know of a church in our region that on Halloween, they set up, they get permission from a, you know, a family in their church, they set up a basically an extra house, but like a thing, and they give out full size candy bars, right?

And you know, but they say that we just want to be a blessing in the neighborhood and is exactly what you guys are saying. So I that's fairly practical and it comes every year, whether you like it or not, it doesn't matter. It's going to happen. Why not take advantage of that? Yeah. What else?

Jeff Dillon (35:54)
Oh man, had a party here actually where we had a bunch of people over at Jeff's house here this last, or it two weeks ago, and we rented a apple cider press. So obviously fall time harvest, so we had a bunch of apples and it was just really cool. We had chili, soup, you know, just a bunch of stuff. And then the kids were able to just use this apple cider press and we made some homemade apple cider. And it was just a really fun, practical way to

build community and yeah, was, and hopefully the kids learned something too. Something we've done recently is speaking of the little, the little solo stove thing or whatever it is, we have one of those and we usually have it on the back patio just because of space, our, because our home was not designed with a large front porch, but we bring it out to the front and just put it kind of in the front of the driveway and we'll do s'mores and

Jason Allison (36:26)
Yeah. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Jeff Dillon (36:48)
We just go around, just invite neighbors and you know, the neighbor kids all come over and make us more. But it was really fun this last time there was a couple of construction workers down the street that were still working like late on a Friday, pretty late in a Friday evening. They were doing some, some work. I don't know what they were doing. I'm a pastor. I don't understand construction. But they, you know, we, went down and, and invited them, you know, like, Hey, you should come. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Jason Allison (37:04)
Psst.

Jeff Dillon (37:16)
construction workers. don't do s'mores, right? And they're like, thank you. They were real nice about it. But, but then later as I told two of my girls, I'm like, just go take them one, like make them one and take it. And they went down there and they were just like the hap, they like became little kids, you know, they were so happy and they even came down later just to thank us. And, and so it just like simple things like that again, so much of it is just being out there, being available. ⁓ Our neighborhood we've

Jason Allison (37:40)
you

Jeff Dillon (37:42)
My wife does such a good job with this and she started, she did a popsicle night several years ago where we just had a cooler popsicles in the summer and a sign, you know, and, and now that's grown into like a yearly park gathering where a hundred or more people come. And so I can just start so small and simple. I think a lot of times we feel like it has to be this big elaborate thing and you can do some of those things, but sometimes it's being outside with a, with a cooler of popsicles. I guess the flag wouldn't be up.

Jason Allison (37:48)
you

Jeff Dillon (38:09)
on that one. But a cooler of something and you can make those connections. That's true. That's good stuff.

Jason Allison (38:12)
It depends on the depends on the popsicles, right?

Rob Paterson (38:12)
Yeah. freeze it. I don't know. so,

so guys, one last question, you know, if, there's a pastor listening to this, or a leader at a church listening to this and they're thinking to themselves, man, you know, our church just over a long period of time has become a lot more inwardly focused. You know, people come here for lots of programs or classes or whatever.

But if they're being honest, maybe they're seeing like their church dwindle and they're not like super hopeful because, know, like once everybody dies out, that's it. Cause you know, people aren't engaging their neighbors or their community. And maybe some of the things they've heard today, you know, not only cause them to want to get a copy of the book, but they're like, man, I would love to take some steps to really infuse some of these ideas into our culture.

to get us looking out and facing out and really interacting with people and reaching people for Jesus. Are there one or two words of encouragement you guys might wanna give to people whose heart really is to see that shift in their local church?

Jeff Dillon (39:17)
Yeah, I think that's great. that's why we wrote the book too, is not only for the lost and lonely, really for the church to encourage the church. I think when we take a party from the back and put it in the front, is no longer like something that's secluded. It turns it into an us scenario. And people, our neighbors see that. getting back to your question, I think it all starts at the heart level.

and it's going to take these little steps. And I think when it's modeled, there will be some traction. And we, I don't know if we wrote it in the book or not, but in our conversations, we've said like, you you can't give what you don't have. And so we just need to encourage the church to recognize like, what is at the heart level? Like, who are we in Christ? And what has God actually called us to? And so we just really need to start at the heart level.

Jason Allison (40:01)
Hmm.

Jeff Dillon (40:04)
That's the first thing that came to my mind is like, like start with modeling it, like live it, you know, yourself. That's challenging for me as a pastor. Like I don't want to, um, I want to practice what I preach. Right. And, um, we have a pastor friend who always says, you know, if you want your people to believe it, you've got to hemorrhage it as a leader. so, you know, starts with you and living it out. And then, you know, I think about some of the things we've done and, this is challenging in different environments. Um, we're, we're a downtown church. So we like literally don't.

Rob Paterson (40:21)
Hmm.

Jeff Dillon (40:33)
We don't have an outside. I don't have a yard, but we've done some things where like on a Sunday we've sent people out and I think we gave every family like a five or $10 gift card depending on your size of church. You might have to adjust that number, but we gave people a little gift card and said, go eat somewhere in downtown after this or grab a cup of coffee. And then we gave people a little cards, nothing about the church actually, but just like a, God loves you.

Jason Allison (40:35)
Right.

Jeff Dillon (40:59)
And and just encourage people like if you get an opportunity to pray for someone do that but if nothing else just go and bless and tip well and And just be in the community. So there's even some things I think we could do as a church to like actually do a party in the front as a church and model it and Show people how simple it can be. I know a lot of churches do things around, you know, it's not Halloween for the it's fall festival or whatever it's

Jason Allison (41:14)
Mm.

Jeff Dillon (41:22)
Trumpetry or Christmas time things. like, you know, what are things we can do to, to invite people into that and show our body what this looks like. And then, you know, I think, I think we did a series, an actual teaching series, teaching through the blessed strategy a few years back. And that was really helpful. So I'd encourage pastors to look at that. They can grab the book and steal it from us or steal it from wherever else. But that was really helpful. We talked through each of those things, you know, begin with prayer, listen well.

Jason Allison (41:38)
Mm-hmm.

Jeff Dillon (41:52)
Eating with people the power of food and having having a meal with someone Serving others and sharing our story and God's story, you know just walking the body through that I think is really helpful as well But I I really think the best thing we can do is live it ourselves and invite people into it Our small group. go ahead. Sorry Jason This this coming weekend actually when our small group meets that we're gonna be going through the introduction in the first chapter and we actually Jeff and I wrote

Jason Allison (41:55)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, no, no, you go ahead. Go ahead, go ahead.

Jeff Dillon (42:20)
seven-week study guide with this. So our small group is going to be going through this this fall. We're excited to kind of roll that out and we can send you that PDF. It's just a free thing that if you wanted to put that in the link too.

Jason Allison (42:28)
Yeah.

Absolutely. We'd love to do that. Yeah, I love the concept. I love what you guys are doing. I really do appreciate it and we can't wait to share it. Of course, the link to buy the book and everything will be in the show notes and we'll share it, all the social media stuff. But one thing I would encourage the pastors who do engage this is, what does it look like for the church to actually not only teach it, but then resource their people to do it? What would it look like if the church had

Rob Paterson (42:53)
Hmm.

Jason Allison (42:56)
a couple of big bags of supplies for a front yard party that people could check out or take with them or what. Even things, I I've heard of church that have like those blow up screens so you could do an outdoor movie, right? And what would it look like if the church owned a couple that you could check out to do a party in the front? Things like that could be a cool.

Jeff Dillon (43:11)
Yeah. Great idea.

Rob Paterson (43:17)
Hmm.

Jason Allison (43:20)
I've just, we've got some really creative listeners. So I think they're going to come up with some great ideas. And so, ⁓ guys, I really do appreciate you and I appreciate the book, the effort that you put into that. thank you so much for doing that. And, yeah, for the conversation, man, this was amazing.

Rob Paterson (43:25)
Yeah.

Jeff Dillon (43:36)
thank you guys. Thanks for having us. And yeah, I was going to say we, we would, one of the things we'd love to see and hear is ideas from other people and what they're doing. So any pastors or church leaders, like we'd love to hear those ideas and, and share those. We're on Instagram at party in the front book. And so we're trying to just share ideas and things on there. and, and you can find us other places, but we'd love to connect and just hear those stories and, encourage one another with, some of those ideas. So yeah, love it. Thank you guys for having us.

Rob Paterson (44:03)
So good.

Jason Allison (44:05)
of course. Yeah. And to our listeners, man, take a minute and send us your ideas. Like we'll forward it. We'll make sure you get connected and we can share those. And I think we're friends on Instagram now, so that way we can share together some things and that would be awesome. And for our listeners, too, I mean, take this this episode and share it with some friends, you know, subscribe so that you get these every week. And we really appreciate you.

Jeff Dillon (44:15)
There you go.

Jason Allison (44:27)
You do church every week and we understand that that can be tiring. It can be draining, but in the same breath, it's the most beautiful thing in the world and it is God's plan to save the people of this world. And so we appreciate you and we are cheering for you. Have an amazing week and we will talk to you again next week. Take care.