Mom of 6 Shares Back to School Routines & How to Confidently Send Kids to School

Ever pondered on how to weather the rollercoaster ride of sending your kids back to school? Pull up a chair and join us as we explore this emotional journey with my good friend Nicki, a mother of six who has experienced it all. Nicki spills the beans on managing these mixed feelings, from praying and affirming her children into a positive mindset to the beauty in watching them carve out their independence.

You'll pick up a few tricks as Nicki walks us through her strategies for dealing with a full house and busy schedules brought on by the new school year. She unveils her routine in planning the week, enforcing a bedtime routine, and ensuring homework is done in a timely manner. We gush about the perks of having teenage drivers and a small house in town and the crucial role of routines during the school year.

In the spirit of growth, we dive into the sometimes tricky path of letting our kids fly solo. From packing lunches to back-to-school routines, we delve into the emotional aspects of raising children and the joy of watching them flourish. Tune in as Nicki shares her wisdom on instilling responsibility in her kids, from sandwich-making to packing their own lunches. Don't miss out on this enlightening conversation packed with relatable experiences and handy tips.

Connect with Nicki on Instagram @review.momma

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Connect with Ciera on Instagram @confidentlybeautifulpodcast

Transcript

Ciera: 0:03

You're listening to Confidently Beautiful with Ciera, a podcast to help you stay confidently beautiful, because we all have confidence inside us. We just need to bring it out and I'm here to show you how Body image, dreams, parenting, style, personality and more here we cover it all. Get ready to stay confidently beautiful. I have my beautiful friend, nicki here. Nicki and I are friends through our makeup and skincare business and I have gotten to meet her in person a couple times now and she is just so fun. She is a mom of six and I thought that this would be a really fun episode to talk to her and pick her brain about back to school, because she has all the experience of having all these kids. She has different age ranges of kids and I thought it would be really fun. So, nicki, why don't you start off by introducing yourself?

Nicki: 0:56

My name is Nicki. I'm going to be here, Ciera, with you. I love you. So I have six kids, three boys, three girls. They range from 22 down to nine. So I have three that have, that are graduated and out of school and three that are still in school. And we live on a working cattle ranch in the middle of nowhere. We're 25 miles from the nearest neighbor town, whatever, so it's just us out here and we just work cows and live the ranch life, and so, yeah, it's wild and crazy, but it's a good life. I really enjoy it. So I do a couple of work from home jobs, but Unique is my favorite.

Ciera: 1:38

Yeah, it's a good one, so I can see why I had no idea that you were 25 miles away from another person. That's crazy, it's wild.

Nicki: 1:47

A huge adjustment Adjustment when we first moved here. Huge, We've been here 24 years. So we've been here a long time and my kids know no other life.

Ciera: 1:57

Wow that's crazy. Well, so you have three kids going back to school. So here in Southern Utah we ended school, I know, quite a bit earlier than like other people in the other, in other parts of the country. Are you kind of the same? School end of May, yeah, we ended right before Memorial Day. Okay, so you'll go back, probably mid August, just like we will. Yep, we do, okay. Yeah, I know it's crazy. It's like what, five, six weeks away? I can't even believe it. So I'm not ready. So how are you feeling about sending your kids back to school? Are you like happy, are you nervous? Are you like what? Tell me all the feelings, good and bad? Yeah, I mean, I'm both.

Nicki: 2:38

I love having my kids home. My husband especially loves having them home, because summertime my kids always say summer vacation, what's that? Because they don't feel like they get a vacation. Because my husband's like oh, I need your home and we have so many projects that he wants to do. So we love having them home, I love having them here. You know, being together as a family, working, has really strengthened that family bond for us. But by the time it's time to go back to school, I'm like bye, anyway, yeah, and a schedule, and so it's both. I love it and I hate it. But I think every person is that way. I think you know I can't, but at the same time we're like you need to go back to school and bless, bless parts of teachers that take them on. You know, every year when it's time to go back.

Ciera: 3:23

Oh, absolutely yeah. So how do your kids typically feel? I'm sure every year is different, but how do you deal with it? If your kids are feeling anxious or nervous or scared, like how, as a mom, like that's hard to see your kids feeling all that, how do you help them?

Nicki: 3:38

It is for sure, and I feel like the bigger they get, for me, bigger They've gotten. That's a little bit easier when they're little. It's a lot harder because of that unknown. Honestly, for us a lot of it is just prayer, family prayer, you know, and and Encouraging them and reminding them that they're confident. I think those daily Montres I think it's kind of become a big thing in our world but I think those things really work.

Nicki: 4:03

I think our minds are so powerful and just Saying those things with our kids and reminding them you know I'm brave, I'm strong, I'm smart, I'm capable, and just reminding them that they can do hard things.

Nicki: 4:18

And I feel like I have a Extra added benefit here, where we live and what we do, that my kids have had to learn they can do hard things, they can take on a task and tackle it without someone there, you know, to usher them along the way. But I think just work those things daily and encouraging them when they do Even things around the house you know my youngest like I try to make eggs this summer and just being like look at you, look how good you are, like you took something that you didn't think you could do and you learned how to do it and now you're mastering it. And I think, just remind them of those things when they get in a situation where they're scared or they're anxious to be. Have that inner voice telling them I'm okay, I can do this, I, I am brave, I am confident, I am strong and I can handle this. So I think I think those are really important things. To the time. They're small, yeah that's really good.

Ciera: 5:15

I, even for me as a mom, like as I've sent I mean my oldest is only going into first grade, so I mean I'm like brand new to this world School but even for me, like sending her off to kindergarten and it was all-day kindergarten Like she was feeling all those things and like I did I you know I did a lot of that like you know you can do this, but it even helps me as a mom, like telling her like you can do this, you're brave. Like it reminds me like, oh yes, she is brave, like she can do this, and so I think it not only helps our kids but it also helps us, which is really great for sure, by myself I can do hard things all the time yeah yeah, I love that advice.

Ciera: 5:51

That's so good. And do you have any like really fun back-to-school traditions that you guys do as a family? We don't really do a lot.

Nicki: 5:58

But one thing we always do is we always have a really fun dinner the night before. I usually kind of let the kids pick what they want to have, just to kind of have one last family before it gets really crazy again, especially when you get into those teen years and sports and practices and all the things. So we love to have a really fun family dinner and then the first morning of school of course we do the pictures that everybody else does. My husband loves to make breakfast. That became his thing when our kids were little. He grew up with a mom that always made a good breakfast before school and I was with a mom that did the same thing. So we tried to continue that.

Nicki: 6:35

It's gotten harder. They've got their arm. Mornings we have cereal but we try to have a hot breakfast mornings a week but for sure on the first morning my husband always gets up and makes you know, peas and eggs and sauce and he makes a big breakfast for him. And then not my kids but my little kids. I love going into school with them the first day, taking them to class. My kids know the teachers in our school because it's so small, but you know you sure they greet their teacher. Take a picture Just kind of making a big deal it's. It's a big deal at our school.

Nicki: 7:07

They roll out a red carpet and they play music and the teachers all actually stand along the carpet and they're like, oh, I'm here for the kids, oh, it's so fun, and then you're here, and you're here, you know, and so that makes it really fun. But I think making it fun and something to look forward to helps them be less anxious and less nervous, because they're excited, and that's that's a good thing. They should be excited about going back to school and seeing their friends and, you know, starting a new year.

Ciera: 7:32

Yeah, that's cool Perks of a small school that you know that they take the time to like do that for their kids, like that's awesome. Some back to school traditions that I've heard that I think are so cute is similar to like what you do. They do a dinner the night before but they call it like a back to school feast and they like go all out and they have crowns for the kids. I've like seen stuff like that. I'm like, oh, that's so cute and like, just like you said, making it special and exciting and helping them to feel excited for it.

Ciera: 8:00

Speaking of systems, you taught me mentioned that you love the back to school season, which so do I because of the systems and the routines and you know all of that. So what have you found and obviously your situation is a lot different than maybe the typical family, because you do live on ranch you know you have a lot more responsibilities that your kids are going to have that maybe most kids don't. But have you found like any systems that work for you, like with homework or chores as they get back into the back to school season? What do you do as a family?

Nicki: 8:29

Yeah for sure. So one of the things I started years ago that has been a huge help for me is I started to be a big builder in our kitchen. It used to be on my fridge and I got a new fridge. It didn't fit, but I hang it on the wall and at the beginning of every week, usually like during Sunday dinner, we just go over, okay, what do we have this week, and then we put on the calendar. You know, practice, piano lessons, youth activities, you know if my husband and I be gone for the day, we just we kind of map that all out for weeks. Everybody's kind of on the same page and I feel like that a lot. So then suddenly during the week we're like, oh, we've got, we've got to all go football game out of town or whatever. So I feel like that has especially the bigger my kids got and involved, they got in things. That has played a huge and just keeping every kind of you know, semi organized. I wouldn't say I'm organized, but that just keep everyone on the same page and everyone aware of what's going on.

Nicki: 9:31

The other thing we do and this is more about going back to school, but I feel like about a week before school starts I try to ease us back that routine of a normal bedtime and getting up when we should get up and having just kind of set schedule in place.

Nicki: 9:47

So because summers are crazy, we're running around, we're doing a million things, my kids never go to bed and then all this time to go back to school and they're so tired and they don't want to go and they don't want to do, and so I feel like starting that routine before we get back to school also helps us ease into that so much better.

Nicki: 10:06

And then, of course, we, just as soon as we get home from the day which sometimes is right after school, sometimes is not, depending on practices. But my kids know as soon as we walk in the door we get out homework, we get started on that. Homework is first we get that out of the way, then we go to chores, get that out of the way, and once that's done and they have time for dinner to do stuff, because once I feel like during the school year, once we have dinner it's like time to start the bed to the dean, and so they. We just have always had that schedule. That that's what we do and I think, just keeping those Skeds in place and trying not to veer from that, which sometimes you have to do, just helps keep them going and me saying as a mom, because they know what to expect and I think that I think that's important with kids, that they need to expect.

Ciera: 10:56

Which is what personal know. As for you, with your businesses and just the things that you needed to get done to like take care of yourself. It's probably nice for you to know like, hey, this is the time that my kids are going to need me, and then, like, I have maybe a little bit of time especially as your kids get older, before bedtime and all of that to do whatever it is you were want to.

Nicki: 11:16

It has been nice what teenagers that could drive their own day where I don't drive in and take kids to school or go to town. Or which has been nice is I were in school and I didn't have a driver. I went to town and then usually stay in there. We actually have a second very, very tiny house in there where I would go with the kids that weren't in school and spend the day and had to, you know, transport things to do in there, laundry or whatever. But now that I have teenage drivers, a lot of the days I just get to stay home, which is nice, because then I have that window where they're at school, you know, to get stuff done here, which is nice.

Ciera: 11:54

How nice that you have a little place that you can go, because the way you feel, because the way you feel being 25 miles away from everything you need, you know that would be a lot of driving if you're going back and forth.

Nicki: 12:04

And when I've had. You know, once I got teenage I was in kids in high school. I had kids that played sports and did dance and they had practices after school. So then my little kids could just what we call it the little house, because it's tiny, my little little house, and would have some, have a snack and start on their reading or their homework or watch TV or you know, and so we kind of have to have that so that my kids started school and it has been really nice to have Okay, those are like really good things.

Ciera: 12:30

What do you do about? Do you pack lunches for your kids? Do they pack their own lunch? Do they eat at school? What's your what's your lunch situation like?

Nicki: 12:40

I do a mixture of both. We get the you know the calendar every month of what our school is doing for lunch and then they decide my big kids that are at the high school the high school is actually on the block away from our little house in town, so I keep it stocked to a sandwich stuff you know, quesadillas stuff in the freezer. My big kids either walk or drive over there and eat. But my elementary school kids they look at the menu. Usually at the beginning of the month. We try to look over the menu and see they they all have days that they're like yuck, I don't like that. And so they know that on that day they pack lunch and I keep a little basket tote thing in my pantry with things that they like and they pretty much do it on their own. When I, you know, I'll try to remind them that before he tarot is how salad or whatever it is they don't like, we need to make your lunch. They're big enough now. I mean my youngest is nine, they're now the ones they're dressed and have eaten breakfast and stuff. Then I'll tell them can't get your lunch made and they can make a sandwich. Get their lunch bag and then they grow, you know a fruit or Some kind of snack or whatever you know. They want to go in it and they, they pretty much do it themselves.

Nicki: 13:54

I'm telling you, when you're getting enough to do all those things by themselves, like your mom, life really takes a turn for the better. Yeah, and they can do all those things by themselves. It is so nice. I mean I remember being where you are and a little, and you have to get everybody dressed and do everybody's hair. You know all the things and I mean I miss those days. Don't get me wrong. I, I really do miss those days when they were little and so much and needed all the time. But this is a totally different phase and it's kind of nice. So I make sure of home lunch and school lunch, but they, they're pretty good at handling it on their own. I've turned really hard to raise very independent kids, which has, you know, living where we live Obviously aided in that a ton that I feel like all six of them are very Independent. But I, I'm I'm proud of that accomplishment, that I know that. You know they're good on their own. They don't need me there to hold their hand.

Ciera: 14:52

So how do you feel confident sending them off to school we kind of already talked about this with like With their talking them through their anxieties and their nerves and everything but like, what do you do for yourself? Because I'm I'm sure it never gets easier, even like the older they get, I'm sure it's it's still just as hard. So what do you do for yourself as you prepare for back to school?

Nicki: 15:12

I think I do remember what that I've taught them. All that I've taught them. When they were little and I went to town, I was still right there, and now, most of the days, I don't go to town and so I'm here. So if I do have one of my kids call and say they're sick, I got hurt or something, I'm not right there and so that's one reason why I after my myself like they can't, they can handle this, they. I've taught them how to be independent. I've taught them To be confident. I've taught them to be strong and brave. I'm not perfect and they're not perfect. It's always a process. Even you know, my oldest that's 22 still calls and my advice and means things. But I have, I feel like I have taught them those values. I Just have to remind myself and when I'm I'm nervous for them that they're gonna be okay and that it I feel like that's one of the heart things as a mom is letting them go.

Nicki: 16:12

It's like the mom and the bird pushing the baby out of the nest. Like I tell you how to fly. Now I got to sit back and watch you do it and I'll cry talking about it. It's hard. It's hard to let them go, because you know they're going to have hard things, they're going to have playing blocks, they're going to have struggles, especially as they get bigger, and those teenage years, peer pressure and kids are harsh and judge and it's almost more emotional things that I worry about than the school and those things. But I just I have to constantly have that going, that reminder in my head, that they're going to be okay. They have things to learn, they have challenges to face, just like all of us do, and they're going to be.

Nicki: 16:59

I feel like I've taught them the things that they need to know and they're going to be okay. They're going to figure it out. They have to figure it out. I can't hold their hand forever. As much as you want to as a mom, you want to just keep them right there. I mean it kills me that I've already gone from home. It seems like I just started having babies and was in your stage of life and half of them have left the nest and it's so hard but at the same time it's so like there's so much joy in watching them succeed and handle those things and, you know, become the people that they're going to be. So it's a constant struggle. It really is. It's a constant struggle and I'm, you know, I'm figuring it out, just like everybody else. I'm not, I don't have it all figured out yet either.

Ciera: 17:44

I think you are such a good mom and just leaving the story of, I mean you teaching them how to make you know your nine year old makes their own peanut butter sandwich or whatever for lunch Like I'm sure the first time they made the sandwich, it was painful to watch, like you know, or like they don't put everything they're going to need in their lunch, and you know.

Ciera: 18:00

But you had to just but you had to teach them how to do it and they had to fail, and maybe not having enough food at lunch or not, you know whatever, but you had to teach them to be independent and I think that that's just, that's just an example of the kind of mom you are and I think that it's incredible. So thank you for sharing your, your wise words of wisdom as you're continuing to grow and learn. I think that was. I think that covers everything that I, all the questions that I had as far as back to school goes. But one thing I do like to always ask my guests and it does not need to be related to anything that we have talked about but what is one thing that you do every day to help you feel confident?

Nicki: 18:38

Get up and get ready. I feel like getting up, showering, doing my hair, doing my makeup, making my bed that morning routine. When we moved here we were newly married. We'd only been married just over a year. I knew nothing about ranching and this ranch has been in my husband's family for like a hundred years and we moved out here to run it not really knowing what we were doing. And I remember my mom saying just because you live in the middle of nowhere doesn't mean you should turn into a hatch Always got ready.

Nicki: 19:14

My mom was a stay at home mom. Most of my most of my childhood wasn't until I was, you know, in high school that she went to work, but she always got up and got ready and she was like you still need to get up and get ready, do that for you. And I really tapped her heart and was like you know what? There's? No, I shouldn't get up and get ready. And I have a friend that lives on a farm on the other side of the town closest to us and unless she's leaving the house she doesn't. She's like no one's going to see me. Why should I care? Which is fine that you know. That's her life, she can do what she wants.

Nicki: 19:41

But for me, I feel like if I get ready, I feel better, I have more energy, I have more, you know, just drive to get things done in the day. If I don't, if I stay in my pajamas and I don't get ready, I don't want to do anything, and so I feel like that is a huge, a huge confidence boost for me to just feel good about myself and just give me the boost to get things done. So that's something I do every day. Some days it takes me a little longer to get there, but I get up and get ready every morning. That's really good. And make your bed is a game changer. I'm telling you, I'm shocked how many people don't get up and make their bed every day, do you?

Ciera: 20:24

No, I'm like hit or miss, Like. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, but the days that I do, I'm like, oh, I feel so accomplished. I made my bed, Like you know, it's just something that took literally two minutes.

Nicki: 20:35

Yeah, I do it every. Oh, I'm like crazy about it. I have, and my kids for a long time did not To the point. I mean, when they were little, I moved to the beds and then, when they got to the point that they were big enough that I was like, okay, you need your bed. And most didn't. And my middle daughter that just turned 16, just within this last school year, suddenly started making her bed every day. I was like, mom, my room looks so much cleaner. And I was like, oh, I've been trying to tell you guys that and I've been saying all these things in the videos, which makes me so happy.

Ciera: 21:09

Yes, well, there is something about just getting into a freshly made bed like it just feels so much better than a messy bed, which is weird.

Nicki: 21:16

It's the exact same blankets, but it just feels better I totally agree, totally agree, and it really does make your room instantly look cleaner.

Ciera: 21:26

Yes, it does yes, a piece of advice. I love it so much. Well, where can the listeners connect with you?

Nicki: 21:35

So my Instagram is reviewmama m-o-m-m-a. I share, obviously, unique makeup, but all kinds of products. I'm a self-proclaimed product junkie. I love to try new things, always looking for interesting things, new products, things for your kitchen, things for your home, things for your health and beauty, all the things. And so I share lots of things there. And then Rounge Life, of course, and my unique business. And so, yeah, at reviewmamacom, that's my, that's our. At review mama, I guess, is my Instagram handle.

Ciera: 22:07

So Well, I know you've shared a lot of good things. I like you just shared the ramen thing. Speaking of getting your kids to be independent that ramen cooker I'm like that's genius, like I would use that for myself, game changer, I know, yeah, that thing's a game changer. Yeah, you guys definitely need to check out her Instagram because she has all sorts of good gadgets that you're going to want. But thank you so much, Nicki. This was really fun and I appreciate all of your advice as we get ready for back to school.

Nicki: 22:35

Thank you, good luck with your little one.

Ciera: 22:37

That first one is scary, but yeah, once she's starting her brand new school this year, and so I'm like I feel like I'm doing it all over again, but it will be good so.

Nicki: 22:49

She'll do great.

Ciera: 22:51

Well, thank you, nicki. We will talk to you, hopefully sometime again soon, because I'm sure we would have another thing that I could pick your brain. I will Thanks I love it All of my listeners who are a doula, a photographer, you have an Etsy shop, you have a clothing boutique, you're an esthetician, you're a realtor, you have a house cleaning business, you're a life coach, whatever it is. If you have a small business, listen up, because I have something for you. I have come across an amazing email system. It is flowdeskcom slash c, slash confident. If you go there, you can get 50% off your very first year. That's a big deal 50% off. That's awesome. This is amazing, and let me tell you why I love it.

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