Why Play Therapists Shouldn't Work Alone: Overcoming Clinical Isolation

Are you the only play therapist in your agency? Or perhaps you're in private practice and feel like you're navigating complex cases entirely on your own?

Many play therapists accept isolation as "just the reality" of the field. 

We push through, hoping that with enough time and experience, we’ll eventually "figure it out." 

But here is the honest truth: Clinical isolation is a liability—for you and your clients.

In this free weekly podcast, we’re breaking down why the "solo endeavor" mindset is holding you back and how connecting with a play therapy community is the key to better clinical results and reduced burnout.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The Structure of Isolation: Why graduate programs and agencies often leave play therapists without the specific support they need.
• The Clinical Cost: How second-guessing your decisions and processing complex issues, like trauma, in a vacuum slows down client progress.
• The Mindset Shift: Moving from "I can handle this" to "I need a community that speaks play therapy."
• Clinical Confidence: How having a "backup plan" and a peer network improves the quality of your work in the playroom. 

Stop second-guessing your clinical decisions and start building the support network you deserve. Your clients (and your personal life) will thank you.

Connect with Cathi & Renewing Hearts Training: www.rhplaytherapytraining.com

#PlayTherapy #ChildTherapy #PlayTherapistSupport #ClinicalIsolation #TherapistBurnout #RenewingHeartsTraining

Join my free Facebook Community Play and Expressive Arts Therapy Playground.

Check out my free resources for mental health professionals working with children, adolescents, and families who want to integrate play therapy and expressive arts into their clinical work.

I work with individuals and agencies to develop successful strategies and meet the treatment needs of your child and adolescent clients and their families using play therapy & expressive arts.

Contact me to schedule a free 30-minute video call if you're ready to level up your skills

Transcript

0:02

Welcome to Next Level Play Therapy, a weekly podcast dedicated to supporting the next generation of child and adolescent therapists to provide exceptional play therapy services. We'll explore all things play therapy to elevate your work with children and adolescents using the therapeutic powers of play. I'll discuss practical tips and ideas so you can provide a transformative experience for your young clients and make a real difference in their lives. So get ready to take your play therapy skills to the next level and make a lasting impact in the lives of children, adolescents, and families. Welcome to this week's episode of Next Level Play Therapy. Today we're gonna talk about something that might feel a little what I call ouchy, ouch, ouch, ouch. So it might, it might be a little challenging. My hope is that it's gonna be challenging in a good way. It's gonna challenge you to think differently and maybe think outside of the box where you are probably feeling a little stuck right now. So how many of you have or are currently the only child therapist in your agency, or maybe you're in private practice and you're, you're sharing space with other therapists, and the other therapists are all adult therapists? If that's you, then this episode is for you, and I want you to feel free to comment in the… as we go along. If you're watching the live stream episode, uh, here on Instagram or YouTube or LinkedIn, or you're watching it in the Facebook group, then feel free to join the conversation, the Facebook group. You're probably watching the, the replay, but maybe you're watching the replay on Instagram or YouTube or LinkedIn as well. If that's you, then feel free to join the conversation. Leave a comment, uh, message me if you'd rather have the conversation in private. This episode is for you. This is, this is an episode that I feel like is really important and that we really need to talk about, and that is accepting that isolation is just the way it is, and we just have to push through and accept it and deal with it, because I don't think that's true, and it- my experience has been when we accept it, then our clinical decision-making kind of suffers, and our energy suffers. What we have left over for family, our own loved ones suffers, and we start second-guessing ourselves and wondering if we're actually doing a good job and maybe second cr- guessing your career decisions. And that to me is the cost of being an isolated play therapist, and that's what we're gonna talk about today. Clinical isolation is more of a liability for you and your clients. So join the conversation. I'm Cathi Spooner. I'm a licensed clinical social worker, a registered play therapist supervisor, and I have been in the mental health field for, I am coming up on 35 years. And there's something that I've noticed that hasn't really changed too much over the last 35 years. Even with all of the ability that we have to connect through the internet, I find this is still happening. So I think it's a really important conversation for us to be happening, uh, having. So if you find this information helpful, please feel free to share it across your social media. If you're watching on YouTube, hit that like and subscribe button. Also hit the notification button so that you get notified whenever I go live. If you're wa- uh, if you're listening on the podcast, um, hit that follow button. And also if you're listening on the podcast, I would love it if you would leave a comment, give some feedback. It kinda helps other people find the, find the podcast, but it also gives me some information for what is hitting home for you and how to make sure that th- this weekly podcast, weekly live stream episode is useful. All right, so let's get started for today. We are gonna be talking about today why play therapists shouldn't work alone, overcoming clinical isolation. So the… And, and I get it. I, I get why we have a tendency to believe that isolation is reality that we have to accept, that we just have to push through, make do, figure it out on our own, um, because that's kind of how our field is structured in many ways. I know it was for me. I had, I, I, I was in graduate school. I graduated with my Master's of Social Work in 1992 Was the same back then, and I unfortunately am still hearing the same kind of stories. Although I will say there's, there's been a- an improvement. There are some programs that are beginning to introduce classes, or at least within the class it's starting to introduce this idea of play therapy and, and in my thinking that's really trying to help future therapists work with children, 'cause play therapy I think has become the go-to modality for, for children. But here's the thing, we want it to be the go-to mota- modality, and we want it to be good clinically. We want our clinical decision-making to be… I always strive for excellent. Is it a- excellent 100% of the time every single day of the last 35 years? No. Nobody can be excellent 100% of the time. My belief is though we can strive for it, we can… And what that would mean is we're kind of looking at the things that maybe if we did have a bad day, we're kinda looking at, hmm, what happened with that? And here's the thing, so we work with challenging cases. We work with complex clients, and being able to figure that out on our own can be really, really challenging. And so what we're trained to do in graduate school is we're given an introduction To the field. Some programs have more clinical classes than others. Um, and there's not a lotta training to work with kids. You probably had a practicum where you kinda got a taste, hopefully, of what it's looked like. Some practicum or field experiences are better than others. And then we're told, we graduate, we're f- we're told, "You've got this. You're ready. You're trained. Go out there, figure it out, go help kids. You can do this." But the problem is we end up being the only play therapist or the only kid therapist in our agency in a l- I keep, I keep seeing this over and over. I talk to so many people where I hear the same story even now. It was the case when I started back in 1992. There was a playroom. I got hired because I wanted to work with kids. I had one class on diagnosing kids. I had seen play therapy in action in the 1980s, the late'80s, when I was a special education teacher, and our school psychologist and our school social worker were doing that with the kids in my class,'cause I worked with kids with serious emotional disturbance. I hate that label. Um, and so I had seen it. I graduated. I got hired because I lo- I wanna work with kids. There was a playroom, and I had absolutely no one to help me figure it out. All of my therapists, uh, supervisors were awesome and amazing, and I learned a lot from them. However, they did not know how to work with kids, and I hear that same story now. I hear that story of, "I got hired 'cause I like to work with kids." I had a conversation a few years back at a, um, with a therapist I was not supervising. I had no supervisory oversight. Um, and this therapist was contacting me because they were feeling a little stuck working with their kid clients, and I was known as the kid therapist in the agency. And I'm having this conversation with her, and she is describing to me what is going on and h- what she's doing. And in my mind, I know she has absolutely no idea what she's doing. She's doing the best that she can, and she has no idea. But she told the agency she likes working with kids, so the agency kind of figured she would figure it out. She would get it figured out And when I was giving feedback, she wasn't really interested, um, 'cause she didn't really wanna make any changes. So I, I find that happens a lot is, is that there… people get hired because they like working with kids, and then they say,"Go figure it out," but they have no support provided and there's no structure provided. When I owned a group practice back when, um… this is, ooh, how long ago? This is, like, 10 years ago now. Um, and I owned a group prac- practice for 10 years. I- we specialized working with kids, and when I brought people on board, I made it clear the expectation is we use play therapy here. I expect you to learn how to do it. You… and I will provide the support for you to learn how to do that I don't find that happens very often though. I think it, it is happening more than it used to, which always makes me happy. Um, but the thing is, here's what, here's what I think is not… Here's what I think is getting missed. No, I'm not questioning people are capable, I'm not questioning skill ability. What I'm, what I'm talking about is there's a difference between being capable of doing the work and being set up to do the work well. Isolation tends to increase the gap between those two things. When you're doing it alone, you're isolated. You don't have access to the resources and support that you need. And here's the thing. I've been doing this almost, almost 35 years being in the child and adolescent mental health field. It took me probably a good 10 years, 'cause I started really early before the internet had taken off. Um, I don't, I… My guess is the Association for Play Therapy was pretty spanking brand new when I, or, or fairly new when I was getting started. And it wasn't really until I went into private practice and I was out on my own, and I, I found another play therapist who helped me figure out and, and get started and find the support that I needed. And I s- even after all of this time, I still need support. W- these are complex cases that we work with. There are times I don't know what to do. I have to kind of take a step back, get some support for myself, and kind of get some ideas, um, use my support system to help me figure it out. And to, to expect that we're doing this alone, I think is, honestly I think it's a travesty. I, I remember maybe b- maybe they're still doing this, I don't, I don't know, I haven't checked in about this recently. But I, I remember back in the day- Um, the physicians in hospitals would do this thing called grand rounds, and they would go, go in a cohort, and they would do consulting. And I thought, well, doctors have figured it out and they, and they have all these advanced degrees and skills and they know they need support. And, you know, as a play therapist, how come I think I don't need support, right? That's kind of my, my thinking as I was really pondering this issue lately, because I keep seeing it over and over and over, and I do think it's something we need to talk about, um, that, that we're kind of set up. It's not that you don't have the skill. It's not that you don't have the ability or the capability or the desire to do a good job. I think it's more about the fact that you're not set up to succeed. And to me, that's the mindset shift that we need. So I think the reframe, the mindset shift, if you don't take anything else away from this episode, here's what I hope you take from this episode. Isolation isn't just re- your reality, it's a clinical liability. It's… And it's one that's completely fixable. So I'm gonna say that again. Isolation isn't just your reality, it's a clinical liability, and it's one that's fixable, and you have the ability to fix it regardless of what your agency says or if you're in private practice. You have a lot more control in private practice. It's, it's fixable. The thing that's actually slowing down your client's process, progress isn't your skill level. Sometimes it's that you're processing complex cases without a support network, a community of people that actually you can go to to help you figure things out. So when you're not sure what to do or you're feeling a little stuck or you're feeling a little emotionally exhausted because the work is hard and, oh wait, you're not just showing up clinically every single day, every single session with your clients, you're also have a family, probably loved ones, friends that you need to show up for as well. And so who's showing up for you? Who is showing up for you to help you get rejuvenated, to help you get another burst of energy and inspiration? Who's helping you let hard things go? Who's helping to remind you that you don't suck? We talk about this all the time in Play Therapy Academy, and now my, my new online membership, more community based to reduce isolation. We, we do this in Play Therapy Academy as well, and Play Therapy Elevation Circle, time after time after time. In Play Therapy Academy, we're gonna staff a case. We'll ha- And usually we staff your hard ones, and the ones where you're feeling exhausted and feeling like you're probably the worst therapist on the planet, and that you're failing your clients, and at any moment now, parents are gonna figure out y- you're a big giant fraud, and they're gonna pull their kid from play therapy or treatment, and it's gonna be all your fault. That's what you're thinking. It'll be all my fault. I failed my clients. I failed myself. Or you have, you're in private practice and you're with adult therapists who are awesome, and you, you value them, and you hear from them,'Your sessions are too loud. Can you keep it down? You're interrupting my session.' What are you gonna do? Who are you gonna go to to get support? Because if you don't have somebody or a group of play therapists, play therapists specifically who get it, who get play therapy, that you don't have to explain it to, to help them understand so that hopefully you'll get help, they're not gonna understand. Because if they're not play therapists, they're not trained and they don't understand it, and they're always gonna give the advice of, you know, pull out a, pull out a game, get them to talk or, you know, get a worksheet, do some skill building. That's the advice I got, and it is still advice being given today. And if you're a play therapist, you know that doesn't work. Not that we don't pull out games, not that we don't do worksheets. I don't really like worksheets. I think I'm allergic to worksheets. I've used them, but I, I think I'm allergic to them. I try to find a, a way to engage play with them 'cause otherwise I just hate them But who is there to say to you, "Oh my gosh, I had that problem too. Oh my gosh, that happened to me, and here's what I did." Or another person who said, "Yeah, I had a similar situation. Here's what I figured out what the problem was, and here's what I did to solve that problem." When you're in isolation, you don't have access to that support. When you do have that support of play therapists who get it, who understand the why behind the behavior and who know what to do and how to help you, or at least they've got some ideas. I can't tell you how many times, this happens all the time in Play Therapy Academy and, and now it's happening in Elevation Circle, and it is my most favorite thing, most favorite thing. I love it. And that is somebody will, um, present a case, and we will be looking at the issues, or maybe we're, we're looking at a sand tray photo, or we're looking at a photo of client art, or we're watching a video, and we'll be able to give feedback. So not just with my almost 35 years of experience, and I can cut through the clinical noise pretty darn fast, um, these days. I've, you know, 'cause I- I've pretty much seen it a thousand times. And here's the thing, even with all of my experience, when we staff those cases together and I hear the amazing feedback of the other therapists in the group, it is pure magic, pure gold, what happens in those consultation meetings. And I… s- 'cause sometimes I can get, like, really focused on a point, and then I, I get fascinated, and my little nerdy part comes out, and I'm, like, kind of nerding out on one specific aspect. And then another therapist will add their, their insights, even new therapists. I can't tell you how many times I've heard play therapists in Play Therapy Academy say to me "Oh, I knew everybody's gonna be more advanced." I, and I'm finding this in Elevation Circle as well, that people are kind of doubting if they don't have a ton un- of experience, but they'll add to the conversation. And it's so insightful, and it hits another aspect of what we're talking about that's just another piece of the puzzle, that if we didn't have that piece to that puzzle, then we'd be missing something really important. And to me, that's the value of community. That's the value of not accepting that I have to do it alone or that I- it's I just have to push through on my own and make do. I'll read the books, I'll watch the videos and it, I'll, I'll listen to the podcasts. All of which are good things. They don't replace having a community of like-minded play therapists. Because when you have that, your skill improves, your confidence improves, and your clients feel it. They pick up on it. They get it. It, you can feel it in the room. And so to me That's one of the reasons I think we need to be having this conversation about isolation, and it's not… We w- I don't think we need to be accepting that it's a, a reality that we have to s- accept, and we have to just push through and make do, because it is fixable, especially now with the internet. There, there's so much access. We, w- in my communities, we have Play Therapy Elevation Circle, which is closed now. It's gonna open up in August, so more on that. That one's more support, reducing isolation, helping you to stop second-guessing yourself and get support, and there's lots of resources in there. And then I also have Play Therapy Academy. So for those people who really want to do a deep dive and really work on their skill building and their confidence, but they wanna do it in a community where they don't have to feel like they're alone, then, then that's Play Therapy Academy. And one of my absolute favorite things about Play Therapy Academy is our group consultation. We have people in there who have been in there like four years, three years, two years. Some people stay shorter. W- I would say most people stay at least two years. And we get a really solid support 'cause it's much smaller. Elevation Circle, there's not a limit. Play Therapy Academy there is, because that one is designed to meet the criteria for the Association for Play Therapy, so the, um, if you're pursuing your RPT credential. So we keep that one small, and that, and because people stay for a while, I think we get kind of close-knit. People come and go. Life happens, that, you know, those things happen, and we, we do have a, a really amazing group. And I get ideas from them. I, I, I love those, those meetings, and I think if you asked anybody in Play Therapy Elevation Circle or Play Therapy Academy what's their favorite part, they would tell you it's those group consultation meetings, or in Circle it might be the, um, book club meetings where we kinda nerd out in there also. The idea is, the foundation is that we're not doing it alone, that you have a community of like-minded play therapists to help you figure it out. And here's the thing, there is a cost to isolation, and here's what I want you to really, really, really sit with this week. Every week, this… Well, let me back up a minute. So this one might be a little ouchie. So if, if it is a little stingy, ouchie, ouchie, um, my hope is that it's in a good way. This isn't meant to be judgmental. It isn't meant to make you feel bad. It is not, I promise you that. It is meant to challenge this mindset of we just have to accept reality. That's what it's meant to chu- to, to challenge. So that is my hope. And here's what it is. Every week you sit, every… Sorry. Every week you spend clinically isolated is another week of second-guessing yourself that you could have made those decisions with confidence. I'm gonna say that again. Every week you spend in isolation is another week of second-guessing yourself and making decisions without feeling confident. And I have been there. It feels awful. I remember that feeling. And I remember the difference it made when I got support. My confidence soared. I see that today. I see that in Play Therapy Academy. I see play therapists who came into Play Therapy Academy, and I would also say Elevation Circle. I see people come into Play Therapy Academy second-guessing themselves, feeling like they're probably the worst play therapist on the planet, having very little confidence, and leaving. And I, I s- I watch them really blossom and grow, and confidence grow, and you can see it in their, you can see it in their voice, you can see it in their feedback, I can see it in the way they show up. And what I see it when we see the, when we observe the videos, you can see that in the playroom Every week you spend clinically isolated is another week of second-guessing all of your clinical decisions and not having confidence. That is the cost of being isolated. That's another week of getting parent phone calls where you're, um, getting off the phone feeling like you've failed your client and, um, you kind of have your heart pounding maybe a little bit during that phone call. Maybe you're kind of second-guessing yourself in the head, in your head, not knowing what to say, just trying, hoping the conversation ends, and you're just kind of saying whatever you need to say in order to get the phone call to end. It's another week of a child probably not making as much progress as quickly as they can because you don't have a room full or a Zoom call full of peers, other play therapists who get it, who can give you the feedback and the support that you need, and that's where confidence comes from. And here's the other thing. Here's the other thing I see all the time, is play therapists feeling burned out and overwhelmed and feeling a little guilty because they showed up in a way being fully present, attuned with their client session after session, and then they got nothing when they go home for their own kids Talk about guilt, right? I know I struggled with that, and we talk about that in Play Therapy Academy as well because we're feeling burned out. You show up, that therapeutic use of self session after session, day after day after day. How are you getting your own well filled up, right? Where are you getting your support? And to me, that's what a play therapy community does. I see that all the time. People will come in and say,'I'm just really struggling. Here's what happened. I feel like the worst play therapist. I feel like the worst parent. I'm just tired and worn out, and here's what happened to me this week.' And then we provide so much encouragement and support, and it's genuine because we have relationship. It's not a free Facebook group where it's strangers in a group where you might ask a question. This is a group of people who know each other and support each other and trust each other, and we challenge each other, giving some clinical feedback. I will challenge you I hope in a gentle way, but still in a very direct you gotta get this done way, right? That's how we grow and learn, but we're not gonna do it if we don't trust the people that we're with. That's your play therapy community, being with people you trust, being with people that you know. And, you know, Facebook groups are great. You can get some resources. Discussion boards are great. It is not the same for getting to know the actual people that you are in community with, that you know them and they know you because you've spent time together and you've shared things and they've helped you grow clinically. They've helped your confidence grow clinically. To me, the cost of isolation is not having that in your clinical decision-making, and the quality of services that you can provide is impacted. But here's the other thing. It also impacts your personal life. We need support. We can't do this in isolation. And here's the thing. When that changes, when you stop being isolated and you start being in community, everything starts to shift for you and your clients. And so that is what we talked about today. That is, that is our topic for today. Let me just go do a quick recap for what we are talking about today, which is why play therapists shouldn't work alone, the cost of isolation. Um, so we, we've kind of talked about, um… For years that I've heard play therapists are the only kid therapists in their agency, or they're in private practice with limited access to s- specific support. So they just kind of accept that being isolated and being the only kid therapist is the reality, and I just have to push through and get it done. I'll look for free resources on s- online. I'll, I'll get a book, I'll read the book, I'll attend a training. But here's the thing, at some point you have to apply that information with clients who aren't always gonna line up with what the book said or the free video said, or even what I said, um, on maybe one of my episodes. When you're in community, you have somebody to talk that through with, which is why when I was doing trainings, um, for the first half of this year, all of the trainings that I provided included at least 60 days of access as part of the registration to Play Therapy Elevation Circle. Because I know even in my trainings, you're gonna leave like a month later and wonder, "Oh, what do I do with this client? How do I use that information for this client?" And to me, that's where community comes in. And so that's the mindset shift, is that being isolated results in feeling overwhelmed, second gle- guessing your clinical decisions, feeling burned out. We are not intended to do this alone. Human beings aren't designed to be alone. We… Even if you're somebody who likes a lot of, as I say, me time, I have a s- my oldest son likes a lot of me time, but he, you know, even people who tend to be a little more introverted still need connection. Everybody needs connection. And that's, um, being isolated is probably the reason that you're second guessing yourself and doubting your, your decision-making. That's the cost of isolation. The truth is that accepting isolation doesn't really help you get the best results you can for your clients. In fact, it might be the reason your clients aren't making as much progress as they could be. I know that one's a little stingy. Um, it's not meant to induce guilt. It is meant to shift and challenge thinking though. So if I've done that, then I've, I've accomplished my goal for today's session. And so that is it for today. If you're interested, I do currently have some openings in Play Therapy Academy Um, it's a small group, so in Play Therapy Academy, I only have openings when somebody leaves. So in Play Therapy Academy, we meet twice a month. We do clinical consultations, somebody… always two people presenting, because we're going to kind of have dedicated time to staff your clients. You'll get my almost 35 years of experience plus the collective wisdom of the group. There are courses in there to support your learning, and then we also have a group chat space. And anybody, all, anybody in Play Therapy Academy also has access to the Elevation Circle membership as well, so access to our book club, and our mini trainings in there, and other, uh, consultation and support. So there's a lot, there's a lot of support in Play Therapy Academy. So if you're interested, if, in Play Therapy Academy, and you are tired of trying to figure it out alone, and you want to improve your skills using play therapy 'cause you're tired of feeling like an imposter, worrying that parents are gonna figure out at any moment in time that you don't know what you're doing, uh, and pull their child from therapy, which means you would've failed. Not, not really. And trying to do it alone isn't your only option. There are other options. If you're interested in Play Therapy Academy, then schedule a 30-minute video call with me. It's free. We'll talk about Play Therapy Academy. If it's a good fit, great. If it's not a good fit, that's not a problem either. Maybe Elevation Circle's a better fit. We'll talk about that. Or maybe you're not quite ready, um, and maybe Elevation Circle is a better fit for you. So if you're interested, go ahead and, um, schedule a 30-minute video call with me. We will figure it out together. You don't have to do it alone. All righty. So that is it for this week's episode and I will see you next week. Bye for now. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Next Level Play Therapy. I hope you found the discussion valuable and gained new insights and ideas to support your work helping children, adolescents, and families heal. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to the podcast and leave a review. Your feedback helps to improve and reach more people who can benefit from this information. Remember, play therapy is a powerful tool for healing and growth. Whether you're a new play therapist or experienced, I encourage you to continue your learning journey to unlock the potential of play in your own work and relationships. If you have any questions or topic suggestions for future episodes, I'd love to hear from you. Connect with me on social media and visit my website at Renewing Hearts Play Therapy Training to stay updated on upcoming episodes, trainings, and resources. Thank you once again for listening to Next Level Play Therapy. Until next time, keep playing, learning, and growing.