The Undead Symphony

Episode 356: Ick (2024)

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0:00 | 52:03

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American made with Arab oil money from the UAE. Is that why the Ick, a monstrous alien lifeform that has been around for about 20 years looks like oil? Maybe. 

Starring Brandon Routh, poor, poor, Brandon Routh, I do genuinely feel bad for him, this tells the story, kinda, of the Ick, and how it has always there in the town where he loses everything after being the high school star quarterback and prom king, with Mena Suvari as his prom queen, to being a crippled alcoholic janitor, then science teacher, before the Ick then becomes aggressive and takes over the country.

Nice idea? The Blob meets Venom in B-Movie madness? No, it is a fucking mess. Despite the acting, Brandon Routh, Malina Weissman, Taia Sophia, Zeke Jones, Jack Seavor and Mena Suvari are all great, a decent soundtrack, and Cold Storage level FX. A bag of cats no one should have opened. 

This movie will cause severe brain damage to anyone higher up the evolutionary ladder than a demented bee. Despite a rocking early 2000s soundtrack (Good Charlotte, Blink 182, Wheatus, Toad the Wet Sprocket)  this movie was put together by a director who makes music videos, so has a max attention span of 4 minutes, and an editor with extreme ADHD. No shot lasts more than 15 seconds, no scene more than 5 minutes, there are scenes crammed in that don't fit, or have some sort of relevance but are filmed so differently that it's like we have ad breaks mid movie and those ads are for TikToks of a different version of this movie.

I go back to my Hitchhiker's reference, "this movie will cause severe brain damage to anyone higher up the evolutionary ladder than a demented bee." 4/10 and very very disappointingly put together. Sorry, Brandon.